Shaving free porn video

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First time I tried it I almost bled to death, a Bic razor is useless, cuts down the base of my shaft and 7 or 8 on my sack, can you imagine trying to put band-aid on a scrotum
So Veet, jees that stuff burns, I looked like it had been napalmed lol, bright red sores and the pain well that's something else,
I really should have read the reviews first haha
this one had me in tears

Veet -- the Men Hair Removal Gel Creme (from hell) . . .
By John W. Osborne Jr. - 30 July 2012
After having been told my danglies (American: "dingle-berries") looked like an elderly rastafarian I decided to take the plunge and buy some of this as previous shaving attempts had only been mildly succesful and I nearly put my back out trying to reach the more difficult bits.

Being a bit of a romantic I thought I would do the deed on the missus's birthday as a bit of a treat.I ordered it well in advance and working in the North sea I considerd myself a bit above some of the characters writing the previous reviews and wrote them off as soft office typesoh my fellow sufferers how wrong I was.

I waited until the other half was tucked up in bed and after giving some vague hints about a special surprise I went down to the bathroom. Initially all went well and I applied the gel and stood waiting for something to happen. I didn't have long to wait.

At first there was a gentle warmth which in a matter of seconds was replaced by an intense burning and a feeling I can only describe as like being given a barbed wire wedgie by two people intent on hitting the ceiling with my head.

Religion hadn't featured much in my life until that night but I suddenly became willing to convert to any religion to stop the violent burning around the turd tunnel and what seemed like the destruction of the meat and two veg.

Stuggling to not bite through my bottom lip I tried to wash the gel of in the sink and only succeeded in blocking the plughole with a mat of hair.Through the haze of tears I struggled out of the bathroom across the hall into the kitchen by this time walking was not really possible and I crawled the final yard to the fridge in the hope of some form of cold relief.

I yanked the freezer drawer out and found a tub of ice cream, tore the lid of and positioned it under me. The relief was fantastic but only temporary as it melted fairly quickly and the fiery stabbing soon returned.

Due to the shape of the ice cream tub I hadn't managed to give the starfish any treatment and I groped around in the draw for something else as I was sure my vision was going to fail fairly soon. I grabbed a bag of what I later found out was frozen sprouts and tore it open trying to be quiet as I did so. I took a handful of them and tried in vain to clench some between the cheeks of my arse.

This was not doing the trick as some of the gel had found it's way up the chutney channel and it felt like the space shuttle was running it's engines behind me.This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen which should give you some idea of the depths I was willing to sink to in order to ease the pain.

The only solution my pain crazed mind could come up with was to gently ease one of the sprouts where no veg had gone before.

Unfortunately, alerted by the strange grunts coming from the kitchen the other half chose that moment to come and investigate and was greeted by the sight of me, arse in the air, strawberry ice cream dripping from my bell end pushing a sprout up my arse while muttering" Ooooh that feels good "

Understandingly this was a shock to her and she let out a scream and as I hadn't heard her come in it caused an involutary spasm of shock in myself which resulted in the sprout being ejected at quite some speed in her direction.

I can understand that having a sprout farted against your leg at 11 at night in the kitchen probably wasn't the special surprise she was expecting and having to explain to the k**s the next day what the strange hollow in the ice cream was didn't improve my statusSo to sum it up Veet removes hair, dignity and self respect. :-[/b]

So is there anything out there that will do the job without cooking my meet and two veg?
YEP, Soft Sheen Carson Magic shave cream, nice minty smell, cooling and kind to the skin, just cover the whole lot in this stuff, wait 10 minutes and wash it off with warm water, apart from blocking up the plug hole this is faultless

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MY WIFE TINA TAKES CARE OF HER NEEDS My Wife (Tina) and I have been married for 27 Years and she has been telling me how she would like to spice up our sex life after it has become doll. (Tina does go out and FUCK other guys but she says getting FUCKED in the bed of a truck or in a car or on a car hood does not take care of here needs not one COCK at a time it is a turn on but she says she needs more.) So I ask her what she would like. She said she would like to FUCK Two COCKS at the same...

2 years ago
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The Barbie Lez Fantasies Week 80 Incestuous Horseplay

Introduction: A quick and kinky bestiality fantasy! Authors Note 1: These short fantasies started off as weekly mini-stories for my readers, but the newsletter was shut down because autoresponders do not accept adult content. I thus decided to publish these fantasies for free for my readers to enjoy. It is meant to entertain, so please do not leave hateful comments if everything is not perfect. I am only human after all. Authors Note 2: Although this fantasy can be read independently, it was...

3 years ago
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The Librarian Part 4

Being perhaps the more sensitive of the two, Daniel cherished most the intimate times they shared. Sex wasn't the point, although they continued exploring in that regard. More often than not, they just skated together on Lake George where no one else would know anything about them. Daniel had even convinced him to wear girlie skates, and was teaching him how to do an axel. Being so popular, town authorities had recently installed some lighting around the lake and the warming house remained...

4 years ago
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The Hotel worker

I’d worked in the hotel for over a year and couldn’t believe what I was about to do. I had booked a room out and he was there waiting for me. The room was in darkness. I couldn’t see where he was so I walked to the window and stood looking out at the city lights. It was peaceful here at night. This hideaway. Tucked away from the world. I leaned my shoulder against the wall and closed my eyes to absorb the atmosphere and engrave this night in my mind. A soft noise behind me made me straighten...

2 years ago
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Disparate HousewivesChapter 12 Massage Therapy

“Barb, it’s Terri. I just called to thank you for bringing the wheelbarrow back. Was that you or Jerry who brought it back?” Barbara Blockings blushed to her toes at the question. Thank God Terri couldn’t see her. She was mortified at the question. “Uh, I rolled it back Saturday morning. I guess you guys were still asleep. It was a great party.” “Definitely!” agreed Terri. “We were exhausted and slept late the next day. Anyway, thank you. Jerry all right? Was he sick?” No, just a drunken...

2 years ago
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justin cant pay the rent

'andy i'm really sorry but i can't afford to pay my rent this week since i lost my job and i'm finding it hard to get another i'm sorry mate' justin says'well justin when i agreed to let you stay i told you that you have to pay rent at the start of every month or you have to leave i'm sorry but you did agree to it''yeh but look mate i am good for it just give me a chance to find another job i don't have anywhere else to stay please''no i won't back down on this you agreed to pay at the start of...

3 years ago
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Fulfilling Casual Lovers Second Impregnation Wish

I ran some more hot water to make sure the suds covered my erection. Shelly came into the bathroom putting the tray down on the floor before resting on the edge of the tub, I could smell her perfume. Her gown slipped open revealing smoothly crossed thighs, she absentmindedly pulled it back over her knee. She looked very tired and sad but more beautiful than ever, tall and slim with an attractive face, piercing blue eyes, full red lips on a very pale but flawless complexion, and long straight...

4 years ago
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Construction pt 2

Paul then told me that he had seen me pull up yesterday and get out of the car he could not take his eyes off me he wanted to fuck me then and there on the top of the hood of my car. That when he had walked over and saw my lips all he could think about was how they would feel around his hard cock he took his belt then and smacked my ass he said he could smell my cunt yesterday and had waited but I had done nothing. At this point my ass is on fire my pussy is dripping like a waterfall I beg...

1 year ago
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MotherinLaw from hell

Mother-in-Law from Hell By Morpheus I climbed out of my car, removing my tie and popping open the top button of my shirt with a sigh of relief. It was Friday afternoon and I was done with work for the week. "The weekend is here," I said, already feeling lighter, as though the weight and burdens of my job had been lifted from my shoulders, at least for the next couple days. I was looking forward to sitting back and relaxing, catching one of the new movies that had just come out,...

2 years ago
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The Seventh Lunch

Seven years ago I wrote:“The vertiginous sky has given way to indigo hues as the setting sun gives way to dusk. I compared my ex's once omnipresent vitality to the mediocre life I had endured since she left me for a younger man. The infectious she, unfaithful and exuberant to her core, had marked me. Painfully. Permanently. Perpetually.Until today, when it all changed.The excoriation of my passion has ceased. I recreate myself. I am Proteus. Vibrant. Alive. My heartstrings are attuned with a...

Mature
3 years ago
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Making My Darling Happy

I am Anand from Bangalore age 33, its my third story. This happened during Last month. Aunty whom I made Happy making her feel real joy of sex, Indu (Name Changed), she is 30 have good figure and more over I was attracted by her boobs. I was living with my Family and kids, opposite to our building there is House where my lovely Darling lives, she used to stay with her husband and kids, her husband works for a security agencies and was busy during days. I am working for a logistics company in...

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