A Man Anally Molests A Stranger On A Crowded Commu free porn video

Anal Sex with Stranger on a Train 1

On the way home from work, a man anally m*****s a stranger on a crowded commuter train.

Having been riding this train for years, Peter rode this commuter train every day, twice a day to and from work home. In all the years, never has he ever seen the train as crowded. With nowhere to put them, the train was so crowded that there were still people standing on the platform left behind. With no way to get home in this raging snowstorm, they’d have to find a hotel room or return to work to spend the night.

In the way they were packed in like sardines, he didn’t think they could squeeze in one more person but they did and continually kept doing until the doors finally slowly closed. The last train out of Springfield, Massachusetts heading for Boston’s North Station, in the way that the cars were so overstuffed with people, this commuter train could have been a train in Tokyo, Japan. If this train crashed, he was protected by and surrounded by so many human airbags. Not able to move anywhere but up, he’d be cushioned by so many bodies that he didn’t think he’d be hurt, that is, so long as the train car he was on stayed intact and didn’t disintegrate upon impact.

The last train home before they shut down the rail line for passenger and employee safety, there was a raging blizzard going on outside. Another train moving down the tracks ahead of them, the slow snowplow train in the way of an ice cutting ship carefully moving in the South Pole breaking up the ice, slowly cleared the tracks ahead of them only as fast as the tracks were covered with ice and snow again. A bumpy ride, on again and off again, the lights continually extinguished every time the train stopped and, every time the train stopped, the women would gasp and let out a little scream as if they were riding a dangerous ride at the amusement park.

Seemingly as if he was the only man mistakenly put on the wrong train during the occupation Nazi Germany during World War II, there were so very many women on this train. In the way that his body was in close contact and touching other bodies, with women wearing less clothes instead of heavy, winter coats, he only wished this was the summer and not the winter. Only how could there be a snowstorm, a blizzard in the summer? Then he thought of a catastrophe or a terrorist threat that would force businesses to close and everyone to flee the city. Maybe in the way that it daily is in Japan, overcrowded subway and commuter trains was something routine in his immediate future.

* * * * *

Feeling a bit feverishly lightheaded with all the perfume and estrogen that surrounded him, he was the only man in the passenger car. There were so very many women and so very many women’s asses on the train that he didn’t know where to look. With so many asses to see, there were small asses, big asses, fat asses, flat asses, round asses, tear drop asses, apple asses, ghetto booty asses, shapely asses, tight asses, narrow asses, skinny asses, thick asses, voluptuous asses, average asses, BBW asses, bubble asses, chubby asses, plump asses, and asses galore. Everywhere he looked, he saw women’s asses. Packed in ass Heaven as if he was a Jewish prisoner on a train headed for a Nazi death camp, so long as he really wasn’t going to be gassed and die, what a way to go?

He allowed his experienced eye to scan the crowd of women to find the perfect ass and the most receptive victim. Unable to help himself, always his eyes went to the most beautiful women first, typically a blonde with big tits and a shapely ass. Getting better at picking out the right woman, one who’d be receptive to his inappropriate gropes and sexual advances, cramped in a train with so many asses, he felt confident that he’d find his anal sexual match on this crowded train.

Off in the far distance, way down at the other end of the car, he spied his sexual match, a tall, sexy, blonde. Only with the mass of female humanity blocking his way, how would he even get there? With not even room to hold his hands up, he inched his way while allowing his horny hands to touch, to feel, and to wander across the sexy asses of women. As if he was in a new car lot feeling fenders, most women, while moving their ass out of the reach of his horny hands, were happy to be rid of him and to allow him to squeeze by them.

“Pig.”

“Pervert.”

“How dare you?”

“Eww!”

Grinding his cock against this ass and against that ass, he bumped that one before humping this one. As if making his way through a feminine maze, turning one way to turn to the other when spotting an ass that he’d like to be more intimately familiar with, he forced his way slowly and sexually excitedly through the crowd of women.

“Excuse me. Pardon me. Sorry. Excuse me. Pardon me. Sorry,” he said finally squeezing his way all the way down the passenger car.

At last, standing directly behind his chosen victim, he positioned himself behind her, his preferred position with women. With barely any room to stand, he stood so close to her round, shapely buttocks that he’d be hard pressed to slip a playing card between her ass and his emerging cock. With his cock firmly resting between her bulbous ass cheeks, indeed, a utopian paradise for his hardening cock, this was his true definition of nirvana.

* * * * *

When most men drove their cars back and forth to work, perhaps because of the sexy view in rubbing elbows with so very many attractive women, Peter enjoyed taking the commuter train while always hoping that an anal sexual opportunity would present itself. Not ever on a train nearly this crowded, he felt as if he was prowling the grounds of a crowded carnival, a packed concert, or a busy parade route where available women and their asses were abundant for him to rub and bump against. Fortunately for him, there were always many more women on the train than men and with today with him the only man on a car stuffed with women, today was a women’s fest bonanza.

Moreover with mostly men left behind on the platform, the men were gentlemen enough to allow the women to board first. Being that this stop was the end of the line, he got on the empty car going in the opposite direction across the way and rode it back around. When the doors opened, he was already standing on the train. When the doors opened, as if filling an empty container with fast flowing water or filling a cattle car with cattle, he couldn’t believe the deluge of women who pushed and shoved their way to get on this train.

Rather standing than sitting, with the train teeming with asses, he couldn’t count how many up skirts and down blouses, his horny eyes have been already been rewarded in seeing. He’ll be masturbating over this day later tonight while surfing the Internet for porn as his wife sleeps alone in bed with her virginal ass. An anal paradise, he was surrounded by women’s asses covered in pants, jeans, dresses, skirts, slips, pantyhose, and panties.

Everywhere he looked, as if he was Superman blessed with X-Ray vision, he imagined he saw women standing all around him wearing just their panties. White, yellow, pink, green, blue, purple, and black, he loved panties, especially bikini panties that covered firm, round, shapely asses. The only thing he loved more than asses covered in bikini panties were naked asses.

With some men breast men and other men leg men, Peter was an ass man. Even the license plate on his car, in disgust of his uptight, easily, sexually offended wife, proclaimed his proclivity for that one specific body part, ASS MAN. Funny that he’d marry a woman who only had an average ass, an ordinary ass instead of a spectacular ass, perhaps it was just coincidental that his ass fetish started after he married his wife. Perhaps the reason why his wife never rides in his car is because of his personalized license plate. Whenever they go anywhere, she drives him in her car. His favorite song, Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-a-Lot, he knew all the words by heart.

“I like big butts and I cannot lie. You other brothers can’t deny that when a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face, you get sprung, wanna pull out your tough ‘cause you notice that butt was stuffed deep in the jeans she’s wearing. I’m hooked and can’t stop staring,” sung Peter to himself while staring at the ass directly in front of him.

He loved women’s round, firm asses and the woman standing directly in front of him, a tall, leggy blonde had the most perfectly beautiful ass he’s ever seen. He wished there was an Olympic event and a gold medal awarded for the most perfect ass in the world. He wished there was a Miss America contest not for beauty but for asses. If there was a gold medal awarded or a beauty contest crowned for asses, the woman standing in front of him would be a gold medal, diamond crowned winner. As if her ass was a ripe, piece of fruit, watching the movement of her hips in slow motion, every time the train moved her ass moved too. Already in the mood, he’d love to get him some of that.

Getting his body into the rhythm of her movement, as if he was a dirty dancing, salsa dancer, back and forth and back and forth, she lightly bumped him as if they were gently, slowly having anal sex for the first time. The first time she bumped him, she turned hallway around to him without her really seeing him and without him really seeing her and said, “Sorry.” Yet, with nowhere for her to go and with nowhere else he could stand, they were stuck together as if they were contestants getting ready for an ass dancing contest.

* * * * *

Going with the flow, he maintained his swaying motion as if they were having anal sex while sitting on a swing. In and out she bumped him and back and forth he lightly humped her to the timing of her bumping him and him humping her again and again. Such a delicate movement, a mastery of timing, so wanting to put his hands on her hips, he wanted to hump her harder and deeper. Yet, if he missed a beat, she’d immediately know that he was being fresh with her ass when he missed a cue and humped her ass without her bumping him. With the train being this crowded, he’s already gotten away with a lot more than he normally does when the train isn’t as pack jammed with women.

Being that she had already given him an erection with her ass movement and being that the train was so crowded to capacity if not more so, he thought he’d take a chance. With him having much more to gain, a once in a lifetime opportunity, what did he have to lose? Sandwiched by two, very large and tall, Sumo type, wrestling woman with jumbo asses, and with another very large woman standing behind him with a BBW ass, as if standing in a stall surrounded by three barrels, the view of him was blocked by their enormous asses. Eclipsed by three, giant full moons, no one could see what he was about to do with his horny hands.

Besides, if she was so opposed to him touching and feeling her ass, the train was so overcrowded that this poor woman standing in front of him didn’t even have the room to turn around to slap his face for being fresh with her ass. With her arms pinned by her side, she didn’t even have the room to raise her arms to hold onto anything. Unable to free her hands to hang on to the strap, to the rail, or to the pole, she was sardined in this crowd of feminine humanity. Yet protected by all the women standing around her and with him standing behind her, she didn’t need to hold on to anything to maintain her balance.

Ever so lightly, as if forging the signature on the back of his deceased mother’s Social Security check or writing his name in the sand at the beach while ogling half naked women, he traced the outline of her panty through her dress with the delicate touch of his fingers. A master panty tracer, having groped unsuspecting women all of his adult life, an expert at groping, sexually assaulting, and shamelessly m*****ing women, just by the first touch of her ass, he could tell she wasn’t wearing a slip or pantyhose, just panty. Based from his extensive lewd and lascivious, inappropriate, sexual experiences, the ones that he had the most success with in touching and feeling were the women who only wore panties. As if they were asking to be felt up and begging him to touch their asses, such whores and sluts, women who only wore panties, especially within the crowded confines of a passenger train car, were asking for trouble.

* * * * *

He hated pantyhose. They should tar and feather the gay man who invented pantyhose and ban him from residing in the United States of America. Paying an actor masquerading as a doctor to tell TV viewers in a commercial that pantyhose is bad for women’s health, Congress should pass a law outlawing pantyhose. The only people allowed to wear pantyhose should be professional football players and armed robbers. Unable to see panties through pantyhose, how dare some gay man invent something that ruins heterosexual men’s voyeuristic up skirt fun?

Yet, whoever this woman standing before him was, she was wearing his preferred attire beneath her thin dress. She was wearing panties. She was not just wearing panties, she was wearing bikini panties and he so loved bikini panties. Just by the feel of her naked, round, uplifted, ass cheeks, his fingertips were never wrong in discerning bikini panties.

Yet, more than just her bikini panties, he’s felt asses before but he’s never felt an ass like this one before. So round and so firm, yet soft in the way of the desired firmness of a memory foam mattress, she had the most perfect and perfectly shaped ass. She must have been a gymnast, a figure skater, or a champion diver, swimmer, or track star, to have such an ass. Should someone want a better ass and should someone be in need of ass implants, plastic surgeons should pay her to mold her ass.

With the train too crowded for him to do so without feeling the giant asses of the women on either side of him and without bumping in the huge ass behind him, if he could reach his hand down in his pocket, he’d pull out a quarter to bounce off the firm, shapely ass of the woman standing in front of him. Certain that he’d catch the quarter every time with the big bounce that it would no doubt take. He’d love to play that coin game all day with her phenomenal ass. He’d love to hit her ass, slap her ass, squeeze her ass, and spank her ass.

Being that he was shorter than she was, an average 5’9” tall, and with her nearly 6’ tall in her high heels, strangely enough, he was at the advantage. With just barely enough room for him to slide his arm and hand down, when he squatted just a little, he could feel the hem of her short dress. Ah, hidden from sight because of her dress surrounded by big asses, as if her hem was the secret combination to a safe containing valuables, the hem of her dress was the key to her panties.

Knowing what he was about to do, holding her hem between his thumb and index finger, just the touch of her hem sent shivers through his spine. Ever so slowly and ever so carefully, he lifted the hem of her dress as if he was lifting a shroud from a priceless piece of artwork and loosely tucked it in the top of his pants. As far as he was concerned, her beautiful ass was a beautiful work of art that he sexually treasured. God must have smiled at the angels when he created her ass.

Going slow enough for her not to feel him lifting her dress, with him not wanting to prematurely reveal his ass playing plan to her, this part of his sexual m*****ation was critical. Once he reached this point, make or break, depending upon her reaction, the rest would be easy or impossibly difficult. Slow but surely and inch by subtle inch, he raised the light material of her dress until, when he looked down, he could clearly see her light blue, bikini panty clad ass exposed to his horny eyes.

He moved the material of her dress out of the way and to the side of him while holding her upraised dress in place by the tightness of their bodies glued so closely together, now her blue, bikini panties were on display for his horny eyes to see. Oh, my God. Form fittingly highlighted and proudly raised up by the tightness of her bikini panties, indeed, she had an incredible ass, the most perfect ass and ass cheeks he’s ever seen.

Her ass was so round, so full, and so tight, that he couldn’t wait to touch her ass. He couldn’t wait to feel her ass. He couldn’t wait to fondle her ass. He couldn’t wait to caress her ass. He couldn’t wait to squeeze her ass and God willing, he couldn’t wait to fuck her ass.

* * * * *

Fortunately for him in this case, he was no George Clooney or Brad Pitt, and being that he was a plain, average, and nondescript man, all the other women on the train paid him no never mind. All the other women on the train were busy talking, laughing, reading, and/or talking on their cell phones, that is, those who had a cell phone signal. Free to lift her dress undetected by anyone, especially by the sexy woman standing in front of him, he did his panty work as if he was a professional safecracker or a highly successful jewel thief.

Glad that she was wearing a dress when most women wore pants on such a cold, wintry day, most certainly he was at the right place at the right time. Could this be the day that he finally realizes his sexual fantasy to have anal sex with a woman on a train? In the way that some people are proud members of the Mile High Club after having sex on a plane, he was hoping to be a proud anal member of the Laying Down Some Track Club.

Seemingly unfazed, even unnoticed, by the sexual attention that he was paying her ass, he wondered, if she felt his fingers tracing her panty line through the thin material of her dress. He wondered if she perceived a chill and knew that he had lifted up her dress to her waist. Did she know that his horny hand was ever so lightly feeling her panty and her panty clad ass? With everyone having left work early because of the blizzard, unless she was oblivious or high from having a couple of cocktails at lunch, how could she not know that he was feeling her ass through her panty? Maybe his perfect woman, she didn’t care that he was having his inappropriate way with her panty and ass.

One slow finger at a time, as if he was exploring forbidden territory and certainly he was by uninvitingly exploring the panty clad ass of a stranger. Surely, unless she was paralyzed below the waist, how could she not know he was touching her, feeling her, and groping her? How could she not know he was caressing her in a way that she’d only allow her husband, her boyfriend, her lover, her son, or her son-in-law to touch her, feel her, and grope her? Seemingly hopeful that she was having as much fun being touched, felt, and groped as he was having fun feeling her, touching her, and groping her oh, so voluptuous body, he didn’t want this sexual exchange to abruptly stop.
On the way home from work, a man anally m*****s a stranger on a train.

The furthest he's ever gotten to freely touching, feeling, and groping a woman's nearly naked ass on a moving train, he was so excited. Not wanting to make a mistake by rushing things, if she didn't know what he was doing behind her, he'd rather keep it that way. By going slow and taking his time, he was doing all that he could do to make this encounter last longer by being undetected in his sexual assault of her oh, so beautiful body and oh, so perfect ass.

Perhaps because the train was so overcrowded with oblivious women, victims he called them, women who were too busy texting and talking on their cell phones, reading, or talking to and laughing with another passenger to notice what he was doing. With him surrounded by supersized asses, no one could see what he was doing to the woman's ass standing in front of him. He still couldn't believe that she was allowing him to have his wicked way with her ass. Having lifted a few skirts before, he's never lifted a woman's skirt in public before. He's the most excited he's ever been to not only having lifted her skirt all the way up to her waist but also by keeping her skirt there with her panties exposed by the close contact of their bodies.

Even if this sexual m*****ation was to end now with her feeling his hand, swatting his hand away, and pushing down her dress, he'll be masturbating over this day of having his sexual way with a woman's panty clad ass for the rest of his life. It was even more sexually exciting that she was a total stranger. Someone he's never met before and didn't even know her name, he's now more intimate with her ass than he's ever been with all of his co-workers, relatives, and friends' wives. Gaining more confidence and growing bolder with every seemingly welcomed touch, he finally put his whole hand on her panty clad ass and left it there while waiting for her to protest his unwelcomed sexual advances.

From his fingertips to the palm of his hand and down to his pulsating cock and throbbing erection, the sensation of him touching and feeling her panty was electric. He was feeling her ass. He couldn't believe that he was feeling her ass. Oh my God. Are you k**ding me? How could she not know that he was feeling her ass?

As if he was feeling Christie Brinkley's ass twenty years ago, the warmth of her firm, round ass is something he'll never forget and something he'll always remember for the rest of his life. The train slowly moved, stopped, and abruptly jumped before going again while swaying from the wind nearly in the way of having sex on a waterbed. In the way that she continually bumped him and then even sometimes grinded him with her shapely ass, he now knew that she knew that he was touching her ass.

Seriously, how could she not know that his horny hands were all over her firm, round ass? Maybe she was okay with him feeling her ass so long as he didn't try to stick his hand between her legs and move her panty aside to finger fuck her pussy. Moreover and more importantly, she was seemingly okay with him having his wicked way with her ass. What an unbelievable woman, she was such an unbelievable woman to allow him to lift her dress and have his way with her panties. With her bumping and grinding him, ass for cock, he continually and gently humped her and grinded her ass with his erection.

Doubting that a woman so tall, so blonde, so busty, and seemingly so beautiful would allow some sick pervert to park his cock between her ass cheeks before lifting up her dress to hump her, he couldn't believe his luck. Out of all the women on this train, he found the one, perhaps the only one, who wanted to play. She must know that he's feeling her ass. How could she not feel him m*****ing her? How could she not feel his hand touching her exposed panty and her delicious ass checks that looked like something that Michelangelo carved from alabaster? How could she not know that he was humping her and grinding against her ass as if she was a stripper giving him a lap dance?

Back and forth and in and out, she bumped him while he humped her and while she pressed her exposed panty clad ass against his cock as if she was trying to get him to penetrate her through his clothes and through her panties. Erotically exciting and sexually enticing, a sexy game they obviously both enjoyed playing, what are the odds that he'd find such an anally receptive, sexy woman on the train ride from his work in Springfield to his home in Boston? Moreover, with all the stars lining up for this chance meeting, having never seen her before, had there not been a blizzard of a snowstorm outside and had the train not been this overcrowded, he never would have had met her. He never would have had the opportunity he was given to take such sexual liberty with her ass in the way that he was doing now. Always wanting to have sex with a stranger on a train, having always dreamt of having sex with a woman on a train, even if he didn't do another thing, he was living out that sexual fantasy now.

Was she really playing his game of anal tease and tickle with her ass and with him too or was she just that oblivious to his gropes, feels, and touches? Maybe afraid and nervous about being caught in a blizzard and unable to feel anything, she took a numbing Valium to get through the train ride. Yeah, that's it. Maybe she's on d**gs. Maybe she had a few drinks and/or sniffed some cocaine before getting on the train. Not looking the type to take d**gs or to be inebriated, maybe she was just a sexual a****l. In the way that he always was, maybe she was just horny.

Maybe she was so focused on the snowstorm and so nervous about the train ride that she didn't know that he was having his wicked, sexual way with her panties and with her ass. Maybe too frightened over the storm and/or too frightened over him inappropriately touching her, she seemingly didn't care that he was touching, feeling, groping, and humping her ass. Maybe this is all a trap, a setup arranged by her. Maybe she's already alerted the authorities by texting them. Maybe she's just going along with him and would report him to the police as soon as he alighted from the train. Maybe she'd have him arrested, prosecuted, convicted, and sentenced to do hard time for attempted **** in lifting her skirt up to her waist and having his wicked way with her perfectly round, firm ass through her panty.

* * * * *

What others can get away with doing to women in other countries, especially in Japan, wasn't tolerated here in America. The women here weren't as passively submissive as were the Japanese women who routinely submitted themselves to the wills of their husbands, their sons, their sons-in-law, their bosses, and to strangers. The women here were more aggressively angry and wouldn't give any man an inch inside her anal cavity without a diamond ring decorating her finger. The women here would kick his ass if they even suspected that he was being sexually inappropriate with not only their ass but also with another woman's ass at the park, on an elevator, in the mall, or on this train.

As if he had a death wish, his ass fetish was a dangerous fetish to have when on a train with so many angry women, especially with him being the lone man on this commuter train car. Fearing that the women would take their snowstorm frustrations out on him and the law in their own hands, if they caught him having anal sex with a stranger, he feared that the women would beat him to death. So as not to be noticed by anyone other than his intended victim, he had to take care when groping any woman's ass.

So many women, too many women, are dedicated members of the order of Don't Touch My Ass. As if they're all Nuns of the Holy Order of the sisterhood of Anal Virgins, in their detestation of anal sex, it was never an easy task to find a woman so agreeable to him touching, feeling, groping, and m*****ing her ass. With the Puritan lifestyle still alive and well in America, especially in Boston, too many women are too uptight when it comes to anal sex, especially when it comes to anal sex, and especially when they've never tried it before. According to them, their ass cavity is only for outgoing and never for incoming.

Just like Mikey in the Maypo commercials of old, his brothers needed him to try something new, a new cereal, this time a maple flavored oatmeal. Perhaps, if a woman tried anal sex, she'd like anal sex. Perhaps, if his wife tried anal sex, she'd like anal sex too. Only, most times, just like trying to get Mikey to eat new things, women were a hard sell when it came to trying anal sex, especially for the first time.

"Give it to Mikey. He won't eat anything. He like it! Mikey liked it!"

* * * * *

Certainly, she can't be that oblivious to his lustful feels, sexual gropes, and inappropriate touches. When a horse can feel a fly landing on its behind and swats it away with its tail, she must certainly feel the warmth of his hand on her oh, so thin and oh, so sexy panty clad ass. If she didn't want him touching her, then why hasn't she wiggled her ass away from his touch? As if encouraging him to feel more or her, if she didn't want him feeling her ass, then why was she keeping her ass pressed tightly right up against him, bumping him, and grinding her ass against his cock?

Not daring to move his hand from the round, firm, curve of her beautiful ass, taking his sweet time, his way to test the anal water, so to speak, one step at a time, he gave her ass a gentle squeeze when, instead, he wanted to give her ass a hard slap and an even harder hump. Finally, when he squeezed her ass, she didn't move away but, instead, she moved back into him as if encouraging his hand to feel and squeeze more of what no stranger should feel and squeeze of an innocent woman's behind aboard a commuter train crawling through a snowstorm. He squeezed her ass again, this time a little longer and a little more firmly in the way of testing a ripe watermelon in a supermarket. Again, unfazed by his touches, pinches, and squeezes, seemingly liking the sexual attention, she planted her ass right up against his horny hand and right up against his hardening cock. Oh, yeah, he found a winner if this bitch wants to play ass and cock and bump and hump.

Always a wanton desire of his, he always wanted to have anal sex with a stranger on a train. Beckoning him to keep rhythm with his hips, long before his sexual fantasy of having anal sex on a train with a stranger, there's something about the movement of the train and the sound of the tracks that always made him horny. Seemingly a good looking woman from what he could see of her, he looked up at her and all that he could see of her was her long, beautiful, blonde hair. Poking his head around her, to look at her from the side, he could see the full outline of one of her big breasts, her flat, toned stomach, and her oh, so shapely hips. With a body like any sex siren that Homer wrote about in his Odyssey, definitely, she had big tits, a full C cup, maybe even a D cup.

He was glad that she wasn't wearing a long, cumbersome, wool coat that would surely get in the way of his horny hands and sexual desire. With too much material in the way to dispose of, impossible to lift her skirt without her knowing had she been wearing a coat, he was glad she was wearing what she was wearing or not wearing. Too much heavy material that interferes with what he wanted to do to her, it was too hard to discern from the little jacket she wore how big her breasts were but suffice to say that she had big tits. Besides, more interested in her ass than her breasts, where most men would rather be facing her big tits and her beautiful face, being the dirty dog that he was, he was in Heaven standing behind her while humping her ass.

* * * * *

He wondered why someone would wear light, unseasonable clothes when it was so cold outside. Lucky for him, maybe she runs hot. Lucky for him again, maybe she drove her car into work and with the streets unplowed, she had to take the train home, the poor thing. If he had his car, he'd offer her a ride home. He couldn't help but imagine having anal sex with her in the backseat of his car. Yet, if he had taken his car to work instead of taking the train, he never would have met this wonderfully sexy, sexual woman with the great ass who wanted to play bump and hump.

Even though they had predicted some snow, a light dusting they said, the weathermen didn't predict a blizzard. Instead of calling it their pinpoint forecast, he called it their pinheaded forecast. With all of their advanced degrees, meteorological computers, and Doppler radar, it's amazing to him why they just don't pull their heads out of their asses and stick their heads out the window to tell everyone that's it's snowing outside.

Maybe they should keep a beetle in a box to see if it develops spots. In response to decreasing barometric pressure, beetles demonstrate less of a sex drive when the weather turns foul. Actually, a more accurate way to forecast the weather is to be in tune with Mother Nature, more in the way that the farmers are and always have been. He couldn't remember when his local weathermen got a forecast correct, that is, unless they were right about the previous day and the next day in a three day cycle of unchanged weather. Seemingly, they'd have better meteorological success reading the Farmer's Almanac and reciting what's written there as if the almanac was a weather Bible.

Seeing her side profile, she looked a little older, his age, no doubt, late thirties or early forties. Oh, yeah, having learned some sexual things about woman from experience, specifically some anal things, the more mature women are the types who want to play. Old enough to know better, he wondered how far she'd allow him to go with her shapely ass before stopping him.

Too full of themselves and with most of them not wanting anything to do with an older man, he's never had any luck with the younger ones. Seemingly done with sex and angry that they're developing facial hair and bad attitudes about everything to go along with their aches and pains, imaginary or real, he hasn't had much luck with the older women either. Yet, for some reason, the women this age, late thirties and early forties, are the real, sexy, horny bitches, and the genuine MILFs. Married, divorced, and out working for a living in the real world, after having already been around the block a few times, instead of having some dopey guy taking care of them, he has the most success with independent women like her and women more his age.

Seemingly as if given the go ahead, with a long train ride home made into an extra-long train ride because of the foul weather, he had a ways to go before he'd be getting off this train. Not minding the long train ride now that he has her to keep his horny hands and hard cock company, he only wished this train was the Orient Express instead of the express to Boston. Going for broke, with her his type of woman, one in a million, doing something he's never done before, he unzipped himself and removed his cock from his pants and underwear.

With his erection totally exposed, blocked by three, big asses anyway, and with so many people blocking the light, it was dark and no one could see the movement of his horny hands and erect cock. Feeling as if he was a pervert sitting at the cinema filled with oblivious women while accidentally on purpose groping them, whenever the train stopped and the lights extinguished, which was all the time, it was pitch black. The perfect opportunity for him to have his wicked way with her ass, the only one who'd stop him was her and she didn't appear to be disagreeable to his horny hands feeling and fondling her exposed panties.

With her dress already pulled up to her waist and the excess material tossed to the side, he rubbed his erection against her panty in the way that he's rubbed his cock against his mother's, his sister's, his sister-in-law's, and mother-in-law's underwear whenever finding their panties and bras unattended and discarded in the laundry bin. With him the perfect height for her, he stuck his erection between the back of her legs. As if he was wearing a panty clad condom made of pale blue cotton, he enjoyed the feeling of her panty rubbing against his cock.

He felt his cock touch the back and the sides of her bare thighs. The feeling of his skin on her soft skin was an unbelievably arousing sensation. Instead of her resisting him, instead of her fighting him, and instead of her screaming ****, she pressed her ass into him as if she was giving him the permission to penetrate her and to fuck her up her ass. What an unbelievable train ride, such an unbelievable train ride, he'll be masturbating over this day and over this woman for the rest of his life.

Then, surprising even him, with her now playing the aggressor's role and with him being the submissive and controlled one, he felt her long, manicured fingers touch his cock. Unbelievable. She just touched his cock. He couldn't believe she felt his prick. No frigging way. Now beyond a shadow of a doubt and no longer giving her the benefit of the doubt with thinking that she took a valium, was drunk, or nervous about the train ride in a snowstorm, he knew that she knew what he was doing behind her.

Wrapping her long fingers around his cock as if she had wrapped her fingers around his big, hard cock a hundred times before, he couldn't believe this was really happening to him. As if ready to give him a slow, sexy hand job, she was holding his cock in her hand while slowly stroking him to an even harder erection. In the experienced way she was stroking him, no doubt, she's stroked lots of cocks in her beautiful hand before. His sexual fantasy come true, he's been looking for someone like her for years. Oh yeah, no doubt about it, he had a live one here.
On the way home from work, a man has anal sex on a train with a stranger.

Without even turning around to look at him, she reached her hand around behind herself to touch him, to feel him, and to hold his cock in her warm hand. With her holding his cock in her hand while slowly stroking him, as if giving him a not so subtle sign, this sexy bitch was ready for him to fuck her up the ass. In the way that she wiggled her ass and pressed her ass against him and his exposed cock, in the way that she was leaning back into him while he pushed her forward and humped her ass with his cock, he could tell that she wanted anal sex bad.

Obviously, she was into anal sex just as much as he was into anal sex. This one was a horny, sexy bitch. Most women would never have sex in public. Most women would never have anal sex. Yet, she was a woman not only willing to have sex in public but also willing to have anal sex. She was a one in a million woman who wanted him to do her right here and right now on this train to Boston.

Having already crossed the line in the sexual m*****ation of her, now for the difficult part. It was one thing for him to hump her ass. It was another thing for him to lift up her dress, expose her panty, and to feel her ass through her panty. Yet, it was something else entirely for him to pull down her panty and fuck her up the ass, that is, unless he could prove that the sex was consensual. With sodomy still against the law in many states and frowned upon by those who aren't gay men, assuredly so, it was **** for him to do what he was about to do.

Ever so slowly so as not to be noticed by the other passengers that surrounded them on the train, he inched down her panty as if he was a Japanese man and she was a Japanese woman about to be sexually accosted on a subway train in Japan. A chance he was willing to take, he hoped when he lowered her panty that she wouldn't come to her senses, realize what he was doing, and reject him by screaming ****. Instead of standing in the middle of a crowded commuter train, he only wished that she was standing in front of a full length mirror in a department store dressing room. He wished he could see her ass and her pussy at the same time while pulling down her panty in the way of pulling up a curtain to reveal a Price Is Right showcase.

Waiting for her to negatively react with her skirt raised and her panties pulled down, he took a big breath. Going all in and playing for all the marbles, when her panty was down far enough, he licked his fingers and lubricated her tight, little ass with his spittle. Wishing he didn't have to use his own saliva, he wasn't eager to part with his own DNA should there be a problem with him fucking her up the ass and with the forensic authorities identifying him. Yet with him not having any lube and not even a condom, after serendipitously getting this lucky with a woman, what else was he supposed to do? Next time, he'll remember to carry some lube around with him and a condom.

Next time? Who's he k**ding? A once in a lifetime chance, the perfect storm, they'll never be a next time with a woman wanting him to fuck her up the ass on a train during a snowstorm. Only, too sexually excited to think about such things, he didn't think about the reality of what he was doing in sodomizing a woman on the train. Pondering only her naked, creamy, white ass, he didn't ponder his subsequent arrest, felony conviction, state's prosecution, and long term prison incarceration. His only focus was pulling down her panties and having anal sex with this woman on a train.

As if giving her a medical exam, he felt her jump when he first inserted his finger inside of her anal cavity. Perhaps his finger and/or his spittle was cold. Everything was cold on this train but for the inside of her anal cavity. The coldest day of the year with a blizzard outside, fearing that his skin would stick to anything metal, he didn't dare touch anything metallic on the train without a glove.

Then, instead of trying to move away, she squirmed back into him for his finger to penetrate her deeper. Doing her best to accommodate him, she even leaned forward just a little to give him better access to her beautiful, naked ass. Oh, my God, what a woman, what an unbelievable woman. Whatever he was doing to her, she was willingly going along with it.

Out of all the women on this train, he chose her. What were the odds that she'd not only be agreeable to having anal sex with him but also to having public sex with him on an overcrowded moving train? He couldn't believe his luck.

'Thank you Jesus,' he thought to himself.

Without having a computer preloaded with all of the woman who willing would have anal sex and of all the woman who would willingly have anal sex in public, he was unable to compute the statistical possibilities in his head. What are the odds that he'd pick the right woman who'd be receptive to his sexual assault? He picked the one in a million women who'd be receptive to him giving her anal sex in public on a crowded train. Wow!

Something he's never done with anyone before but always wishing that he could do with his wife, his sister, his mother, his mother-in-law, and/or his sister-in-law, surreally erotic, he was finger fucking a woman up her ass that he's never met before. Never even having spoken to her before and someone who he didn't even know her name, so very sexually exciting, he couldn't believe that she was allowing him to fuck her up her ass with his finger. If she was to stop him right now, pull up her panties, and pull down her dress, if this was all that he'd do with her, even though he wanted to do so much more, this was good enough for him.

He'll be masturbating over this wonderful, anal, sexual day for the rest of his life. Finally he was living out his sexual fantasy of having anal sex with a stranger on the train. Even though his cock wasn't inside of her yet, his finger was and if only by the definition of the law, that still constitutes sodomy. Whether a dildo, a bottle, a broom handle, or his cock, she was allowing him to sodomize her with his stiff, middle finger.

* * * * *

Taking a risk and taking a big gamble, fortunately for him, so long as both participants are adults, sodomy is legal in Massachusetts. Yet, what he was doing was still ****, that is, unless she told authorities that it was consensual sex and welcomed as much by her as it was wanted by him. If not consensual and if reported by her, he could go to prison for life. With him on the smaller side and unable to protect himself from someone bigger and stronger, in the way that she was his bitch now, he could be someone's bitch in prison. If caught pulling up her dress, pulling down her panties, and finger fucking her up her ass, already constituting ****, the women aboard this train would surely beat him and stomp him to death.

No tolerance for nonconsensual sex, women had even less tolerance for a man who sexually abused a woman. To make matters worse, they'd show him no mercy for forcing a woman to have anal sex. Yet, even if he told them that the anal sex was consensual, they'd still show him no mercy.

Certainly, if discovered having anal sex with this woman, no doubt with her being a stranger, something he hadn't given any thought to before, she'd throw him under the bus. Even though she seemed agreeable to him having his sexual way with her ass, doing something so nastily forbidden, they were still having anal sex in public on a crowded train. With him a total stranger and her wanting to protect her reputation, no doubt, especially if she was married with k**s and had much to lose, definitely crying ****, she'd blame it all on him.

"It was all his fault," he imagined her saying while pointing the finger of accusation at him as if he was Hester Prynne living in Salem Massachusetts in 1642 in Nathanial Hawthorne's story, The Scarlet Letter. "There was nothing that I could do when he lifted up my dress and pulled down my panties. Too strong for me to resist, I was standing there so helpless to stop him from taking sexual advantage of me," he envisioned her putting the back of her hand to her forehead and putting her head back as if she was about to faint.

"What happened?" He imagined the other passengers on the train asking what he did.

Spreading through the train like a wild fire in a forest, the outrage of a man taking sexual advantage of an innocent women in the closed environment of a passenger train car is something they'd never tolerate.

"He lifted her dress," he imagined someone saying in the crowd. "He put his hands and rubbed his exposed cock all over her panties."

"Pervert," he imagined hearing.

"Pig," he imagined a woman saying.

"He pulled down her panties," he imagined someone else saying.

"Degenerate," he imagined hearing.

"That's so nasty," he imagine hearing another woman saying.

"He fucked her up her ass with her finger," he imagined hearing.

"Oh my God, how dare he do that to her? Such a vile, dirty man," he imagined another woman saying.

"He shouldn't be allowed to get away with that," he imagined the women talking among themselves.

"I could have screamed," he imagined the woman he sexually assaulted saying after the other women discovered that he sodomized her with his finger. "But with the train so crowded and in the way of screaming fire in a crowded movie theatre, I didn't want to start a panic. I didn't want to cause any trouble. I just wanted to go home," he imagined her crying.

"Oh, my God, the poor, poor thing," he imagined women talking among themselves. "How could he do that to her?"

"Then, when he pulled down my panties," he imagined his anal victim saying while pretending to sob in her hands, "I couldn't believe it when inserted his dirty, little finger up my ass. I've never been so embarrassed. I've never been so mortified. I've never been so humiliated. I've never been so used and abused, even by my son and his friends when they had their wicked gangbang way with me when they found me out of my mind drunk."

"Shocking," he imagined another woman saying. "How dare he do that to her?"

"Bastard, he's such a son-of-a-bitch, dirty bastard," he imagine someone else voicing. "I have a good mind to anally violate him with the sharp end of my umbrella."

"Pig," said another woman.

As if he were Julius Caesar, he imagined himself muttering, "Et tu, Brute." Running scared and nervous that he'd be caught and reported, he imagined this beautiful angel, who so willingly returned his humps with her bumps before reaching around to take his cock in her hand to stroke him, now innocently stood before him as if she was the victim. He imagined her turning to look at him before sticking her final, imaginary dagger through his heart in the way that Marc Antony did to Julius Caesar.

He imagined the District Attorney for the prosecution allowing this woman that he sodomized to tell her story to a jury of her peers.

"He pulled up my dress and touched me, felt me, fondled me, and caressed my ass through my sheer panties. Then, he pulled down my panties. Oh my God, I couldn't believe it when he dared pull down my panties. With the train so very crowded, unable to move, I was so frightened. Figuring that he'd finger my pussy, instead he fingered my ass. He ****d me when he stuck his finger up my ass," he imagined her saying while turning to a jury of her peers at the trial with a face full of crocodile tears.

"****, he ****d her. ****, ****, ****," as if the word ****d was a big, biting insect that needed to be swatted and killed, he imagined the word **** passing through the crowd of women who were already angry and tired.

"Then, when he pulled down my panties, I was so humiliated when I felt his cock against my skin. I had to endure him rubbing his stiff prick all over my panty. If it weren't for you women saving me," he imagined her looking around at all the woman on the crowded train while smiling her thanks to them, "he would have fucked me up the ass with his cock. Look! See? His cock is already out of his pants," he imagined her saying while pointing to his stiff prick that proved his guilt.

"Look, his cock is sticking straight out of his pants," he imagined one woman saying while the other women bunched together around him to make a big enough clearing to see his big prick.

"God bless you all for helping me and for saving me from being violated in such a despicable way by such a mentally deranged man, a stranger no less," he imagined her crying. "It would be one thing if he was my brother, my son, or my son-in-law trying to fuck me up the ass at home but he's a stranger trying to fuck me up the ass on a crowded train. He's a man I've never seen before in my life."

"Let's get him," he imagined the crowd turning on him as if he was a drunken Red Sox fan at Yankee Stadium after having just yelled, 'Yankees suck!'

"Let's get the dirty pervert," he imagined someone else saying.

"Push him down on the floor and stomp on his cock," he imagine hearing another woman saying.

"Get the bastard. Get him," he imagined hearing someone else

* * * * *

Even though he was out in the open on a public train and blatantly m*****ing her, he feared being caught, arrested, convicted, prosecuted, and incarcerated. Not wanting any of that to be his reality, he took care not to be noticed. Still, even with being caught in mind, he couldn't help himself from brushing up against her, pulling up her dress, pulling down her panties, and fucking her up the ass with his finger. His dirty, little, secret to keep, yet with everyone possessing a cell phone, assuredly a video of him having anal sex with a woman in public on a crowded train most definitely would go viral.

He didn't want to be caught fucking a woman up the ass in public on a train but unable to control his sexual passion for her, he was a puppet to his need for anal sex. It's one thing to get a public hand job, it's quite another thing to receive a public blowjob, it's even sometimes acceptable to be caught having sexual intercourse in a public place, a park or in a club. Yet having anal sex was as bad as being caught having i****tuous sex with your mother, your sister, and/or your mother and sister. With laws against sodomy in many states, to be caught having anal sex out in the open is i*****l, something that men who are caught doing can still go to jail.

The last thing that he wanted was for the other women to know that he was fucking this woman standing in front of him up the ass. Fearing what would happen if they did, he'd have no place to run or to hide. A fear far greater than being in a squared circle with a cage fighter, being in a dark alley with a group of gangbangers, or being out in the wilderness and confronted by a mother grizzly bear with her cubs, is being stuck on a crowded train with a mob of angry, hungry, tired, and bitchy women. If caught sodomizing this woman, they'd tear him to shreds.

* * * * *

Something his wife would never allow him to do, he couldn't believe a stranger allowed him to lift up her skirt, pull down her panties, and fuck her up her ass with his finger. Even while it was happening, he couldn't believe she allowed him to lift her dress to her waist. Even while it was happening, he couldn't believe she allowed him feel and fondle her panty clad ass before rubbing his cock all over her panties. Even while it was happening, he couldn't believe she allowed him to pull down her panties. Even while it was happening, he couldn't believe that she allowed him to fuck her up her ass with his finger. He couldn't believe it. His sexual dream come true, he just couldn't believe it.

Leave it to a stranger to be so sexually adventurous to give him what he wants, anal sex, and what he needs, anal sex. Wanting to make this a pleasurable experience for her as much it was for him, over and again, he licked his fingers to lubricate her ass before slowly and gently inserting his long, stiff, middle finger inside of her. Each time he inserted his finger, he inserted it just a little deeper and left it there just a little longer while wiggling it as if it was a lure on the end of his fishing pole while trying to attract a fish. Each time he inserted his finger, she leaned a little more forward but, with not much room for her to move without bumping into the woman in front of her, she was just as careful not to attract anyone's attention as was he. Obviously she wanted to remain the victim and not be deemed a consensual player.

This time, going for broke, grabbing for all the gusto, and taking his once in a lifetime opportunity in hand and in ass, no longer caring that he may be beaten to death if caught or arrested and jailed, instead of inserting his finger, he inserted his cock. To finally have anal sex on a train with a stranger, in the way of a bear grabbing for honey in a bee's nest, was worth the risk in being caught. A perfect fit, obviously she was no virgin to anal sex. As if she was totally lubed, his cock slid right inside of her and that told him that she's been fucked up the ass plenty of times before, the slut. Oh, yeah, definitely, this woman was an anal whore.

Certainly, without a doubt, she's a slut for allowing a stranger to lift up her dress. Without a doubt, she's a tramp for allowing a stranger to pull down her panties. Absolutely she's a whore for allowing a stranger to fuck her up the ass in public on a crowded train. Only, glad that she was a slut, a tramp, and a whore, he only wished his wife, his sister, his mother-in-law, and/or his sister-in-law was more like her. For sure, they all could take a lesson from this woman in how to take care of a horny man.

Not only was he having sex in public but also he was having sex on a crowded commuter train. Not only was he having sex on a crowded commuter train but also he was having anal sex. Not only was he having anal sex but also he was having anal sex with a stranger, a stranger who he didn't even know her name. Moreover, except for the back of her head and her side profile, he's yet to even see her face.

Now wondering what she looked like head on so that he could dream of her tonight, yet what did it matter what she looked like? He didn't need to see her face. What revved his motor was seeing her naked ass. What mattered more was that he was finally having anal sex with a stranger on a train.

Going with the gentle swaying movement of the train, he was fucking her up her ass now. For the first time, a dream come true and finally living out his sexual fantasy, he was having anal sex with a stranger on the train. As if they were glued together in the way of two dogs in the street having sex, as if they were dirty dancers who rehearsed their dancing routine on Dancing with the Stars, and as if he had anal sex with her dozens of times already, he was fucking her up the ass.

As the train rocked and rolled when moving and bucked forward when starting up after stopping, keeping rhythm with the windblown train, she rocked and rolled with him too. Humping her harder and with her returning his humps, he could feel his cock sliding deeper until it was buried all the way inside of her ass. Accommodating him without being obvious so as not to be noticed, she leaned as far forward as she could for him to penetrate her even deeper. He was fucking her now, really fucking her up her ass.

In the way that he wished he could tell his wife, he wondered if she'd go home to tell her husband, her boyfriend, her lover, her son, or her son-in-law that she had anal sex with a stranger on the train. Who knows, maybe they shared the same sexual fantasy. Maybe she always wanted to have anal sex with a stranger on the train too. Yet, if only by the extended size of her anal cavity, he knew that this wasn't her first time having anal sex.
He wondered her name yet perhaps better he didn't know her name, being that he had a wife and k**s to protect, he'd rather that they just remain strangers, that is, until she was getting him off with the subtle movement and the humping motion of her ass. Oh, yeah, something he's never done before while having anal sex, he was getting ready to cum inside of her. With his other anal sex partners, whenever he was lucky enough to find one, never allowing him to finish, this would be the first time he ejaculated in a woman's ass. He's never been this far inside of a woman to get sexually excited enough to cum in a woman's ass but now he was about to do just that.

To ejaculate in a woman's beautiful behind, a woman who was so beautiful, so sexy, and so willing, was so much better than the whores and prostitutes that he hired for anal sex. Without having ejaculated in their asses, the anal sex that they briefly gave him never completely satisfied him. He recalled some of the women that he hired and tried to persuade them to give him anal sex. Specifically he recalled those women, those prostitutes, who had rejected him so vehemently. He recalled Keisha, Ruby, and Ebony.

"Get that cock out my ass honkie. Keisha don't have anal sex with anyone but her man," said Keisha waving her black, manicured, index finger in his face as if it was a metronome keeping the beat to her words. "Uh, uh, on no. You dig?"

"Say what Fool? You want to fuck Ruby up her ass? I don't think so. Not today. This ass don't fuck white men," she said. "This ass is only reserved for black cock. Unless you have a color change, they'll be no fucking Ruby up her ass today sugar."

"I beg your pardon? You want to fuck me up the ass? I don't think so," said Ebony putting her hand to her shapely hip and lifting her nose to the ceiling. "Fucking me up the ass will cost you more money than you have or will ever have," said Ebony. "What's say I just suck your cock?"

Compared to them, this beautiful woman standing before him was an angel. Compare to them, she was a model, and/or a celebrity movie stare in the way of Charlize Theron, Uma Thurman, or Robin Wright was but with tits. So close to cumming, just a little more, just a few more humps will just about do it, and he was ready to shoot a load of cum in her ass that would rival the load of cum that he routinely shot in his wife's mouth and/or pussy.

* * * * *

Wishing it was his wife he was fucking up the ass, alas that would never be. She'd never be agreeable to having anal sex. Even when she was drunk and sound asleep, as if somehow knowing that his cock was getting ready to take the anal plunge and that her ass was vulnerable to be so violated, she'd wake up. She must have incoming ass radar.

"What are you doing Peter?" Slurring her words, somehow she was lucid enough to know that he was about to fuck her up the ass.

"Nothing. I, um, lost my cough drop."

"And you thought your cough drop fell in my ass? Is that it?"

"Never mind. I found it right here on the mattress. Go back to sleep honey."

* * * * *

Only, just as he nearly reached the point of no return, the train stopped, the lights came on, the doors opened, and she pulled away from him. The suction he felt from his cock being buried in her ass before being so abruptly pulled out of her ass was as if pulling a cork from a bottle. He swore he heard a pop and looked down to make sure that his cock was still there and not stuck in her ass.

In an instant it was over. With his cock leaking pre-cum, he quickly tucked himself back in his pants and she lifted up her panties and pulled down her dress. That was really something. Totally amazing and totally unexpected, that was really something. Something he'll dream about and fantasize about for the rest of his life, he was breathless after having anal sex with a stranger on the train. He only wished he could have filled her anal cavity with his cum.

Still stunned and still reeling from the sexually excitement of finally having anal sex with a stranger on a train, he couldn't believe what just happened. He looked up at her while expecting her to be beautiful, as beautiful as Christie Brinkley was twenty years ago. If only by her beautiful ass, the best ass he's ever felt and the best ass he's ever seen, she must be beautiful. If only by the back of her beautiful head with her long, blond hair cascading down her back, and by the beautiful side profile of her beautiful face, she must be beautiful.

He couldn't wait for her to turn around. He couldn't wait to see her face so that he could dream about her tonight and every night for the rest of his life. Breaking his rule of sharing his identity with her to know her name, he had to know her name. Tonight when he dreamt of fucking her up her ass again, he needed to call her by something. Moreover, wanting anal sex with her to be a regular occurrence, he had to see her again. He needed to fuck her up her ass, just one more time, at least, in her bedroom, in her bed, and with the lights on or in the dark, whichever she preferred.

"Please, before you go. Tell me your name, just your first name. I need to know your name so that I can call you by something when I dream about you tonight," he said.

She just stood there with her back to him as if frozen in place. Now that the lights were on in the train and the doors were open, maybe the realization that she allowed a stranger to have his wicked way with her ass was too embarrassing for her now. Now that he asked her name, maybe giving out her name, even just her first name, was something too personal, even more personal than allowing him to fuck her up the ass.

"My name is Peter," he said while hoping that she'd turn around and respond in kind and give him her name too.

As the passengers alighted from the train, now with more room for them to move around, she turned to him, smiled, and offered him her hand. Only, instead of falling in love, he felt as if he was having a sudden heart attack. The sharp pain that traveled from his cock to his chest and through his brain to give him a sudden, excruciating headache felt as if he ate ice cream too fast. As if a phonograph needle went across a phonograph album and made a screeching noise with a LP width scratch, he couldn't believe his eyes.

"Hi," he said. "I'm Robert, but my friends, especially those who fuck me up my ass, call me Roberta," he said. "That was the best train ride I've ever had, if you know what I mean," he said with a laugh, a wiggle, and a wink.

"Sorry," said Peter. "I'm so sorry. Oh, my God, you can't believe how sorry I am. With your long, blonde hair, high heels, big tits, and dress, I thought you were a woman. I didn't know you were a man."

Suddenly, the song Lola by Ray Davies of the Kinks played through his mind.

"I met her in a club in North Soho where you drink champagne and it tastes like cherry cola, See-O-L-A cola. She walked up to me and she asked me to dance. I asked her name and in a dark, brown voice she said, Lola, L-O-L-A Lola, lo, lo, lo, lo Lola. Well, I'm not the world's most physical guy but when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine, oh my Lola, lo, lo, lo, lo Lola. Well, I'm not dumb but I can't