Weird Science
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WEIRD SCIENCE
By Eric
Chapter 1: A Fateful Decision
Beautiful, fiery Sarah Langley was pissed. No, that wasn't right. To
say that she was pissed was like saying that Niagara Falls was a leak!
That ignorant Asshole Professor Dr. Charles (do NOT call him Charlie!)
Martin was going to flunk her and she hadn't the money for another
semester. The Asshole wouldn't even let her demonstrate her invention.
And he called himself a scientist! Her hairdresser was more a scientist
than Prof Asshole!
Sarah was 21 and strikingly beautiful, with a great curvy figure and
long midnight black hair, she had a cute, pert face and she radiated
charm with a capital C and had enough sex appeal for 4 girls. Ms.
Langley had 3 boyfriends fighting over her and could have more if she
thought they were worth the bother. Because of this she was not popular
with other COEDS! One Boyfriend Mike, the team's middle linebacker,
even beat up the other two and wanted her to marry him! As if!
He didn't have enough money to support a wife and besides Sarah wasn't
ready to settle down yet.
She drew in a deep breath and every male eye was on her. For once Sarah
didn't notice or care. She would make a final appeal to Professor
Martin, as the day after tomorrow was the last day even he could change
her grade. She went home and dressed in her sexiest outfit, a skintight
black leather mini dress and her tall, black high heel boots.
Sarah had been right about Professor Martin, no one was allowed to call
him Charlie, not even his wife of 20 years. He looked up from his
office desk and sighed. Sarah Langley was here to pester him again! A
woman that sexy and beautiful was not used to taking NO for an answer.
But she would have to! Professor Martin stood up. He was a tall thin
man of 45 with thinning gray hair with stooping shoulders. He felt a
twinge in his neither regions. Damn those hemorrhoids!
It would not make him better tempered for poor Sarah!
If Sarah had a phaser she would have blasted that smug smile from
Professor Asshole's face. But she made herself smile winningly. She had
practiced that smile in front of a mirror most of her life. Her smother
had always told her to smile and be pleasant and men would flock
around. Sarah opened her mouth to speak.
"Save your breath and my patience, Miss Langley. Unless you have
another project than your absurd mind transfer device. You can save
your breath and my patience. It's the most impossible thing I've ever
heard of!"
Sarah's fingers curled into claws. "But it works! I've tested on lab
animals. Rats and -"
"Yes, yes, I've seen your faked data - rats go immediately through a
maze, aggressive dogs become friendly, chimps who have never learned
sign language now know it and their personalities change and you know
there's been a mind swap. It's the most blatantly falsified data I've
ever seen!"
"But it's all true. Professor if I could only be allowed to demonstrate
my device you would be convinced!"
"Give in up, Miss Langley, it's not going to happen."
"But if I don't pass your test I won't graduate. I'm broke. I can't
afford another year of college and my folks are both dead. I'll have to
work as topless dancer or something to live and get enough money for
another year!"
Behind his horn rimmed specs his eyes gleamed at he thought of her
topless! She had the greatest tits! But any fool knew that anyone that
spectacularly beautiful couldn't make a scientific break through like
she claimed. The bland smile got wider.
"Miss Langley, please quit wasting my time. I think your theory and
device is utter rot if you'll forgive me for saying so. (She didn't)
Testing would take a whole day at least and would be nothing but a
great waste of my and my assistant's time."
"You're ruining my life by not even giving me a chance! I beg you to at
least give me a passing grade so I graduate! I was hoping for an A, but
-"
"Sorry." he didn't look sorry but pleased. "I could not in good
conscience prostitute myself. I did warn you that your theory was not
possible. Better luck next year. And this time please take on a less
ambitious and possible project! You might even consider forgetting
about school and just get married."
He chuckled and Sarah felt like scratching his eyes out! He went on.
"Like the Greeks say, we learn by suffering."
"You're insufferable! You can laugh about ruining my life."
He frowned. "No need to be rude, Miss Langley!"
She couldn't believe him. He could destroy her life and then criticize
her for complaining!
The clicking of Sarah's boot heels was like a machine gun. She broke
her date with Mike as she hardly felt like being agreeable - especially
to a man! She had trouble sleeping that night.
But in the morning she woke with the answer to her problem! She often
solved knotty questions in her sleep.
"I'll use the device against him! I'll show the Asshole first hand that
my theories work! Then I'll change my grades, maybe even transfer some
money to my account for pain and suffering."
For the first time in days Sarah laughed.
Chapter 2: SUCCESS!
It was all very well to say ? DO IT. But how and when had to be worked
out precisely. The device could not operate safely any distance over 8
feet so she couldn't switch them at a distance. Also, it had to be done
where no one else was near either of them. Sarah scouted out his
classrooms and even his house where he lived with wife. The woman was
cold enough to freeze ice on her ass. A fit mate for The Asshole! The
classrooms were not suitable. Neither was his office at first sight,
but then Sarah started thinking in 3 dimensional terms. Ah good, right
above his office was a closet full of cleaning supplies. She did some
measuring and drilled a hole that came out right above his chair.
Perfecto! Sarah double checked his office hours. Better and better. He
had office hours tomorrow from 10 to 11 AM.
Sarah grinned as she wrote a note explaining things for the Prof to
read when he woke up in her body - just in case she couldn't get back
to the closet right away. She didn't want the weak minded fool to have
hysterics and run through the campus screaming. That would not do her
reputation any good at all! Sarah explained they would swap back when
she changed her grades. Surely she could make it back in time to keep
him from leaving the closet in her beautiful bod but no sense taking
any more chances than needed. She had confidence in her theories and
her device but it had not been tested on human beings. Though thinking
of Professor Martin Sarah doubted that he could be so classified!
That night Sarah checked and rechecked her equipment. She was smiling
fiendishly like a satisfied cat. Would Prof Martin be surprised!
IMPOSSIBLE, HUH! She was just a silly woman was she! She would show him
the error of his ways!
When Sarah woke up the next morning she was very nervous. It had been
easy enough to plan and think about switching with the Asshole but to
actually do it was something else. But it had to be done! Apprehensive
and frightened she drove in her junker to the office. Shaking, she
gathered herself together. Sarah told herself that her future ? her
entire life was at stake here. It was a litany she repeated over and
over to herself as she set up her equipment. She rubbed sweaty hands on
her old jeans. Sarah wore some old and cheap clothes for the swap. She
didn't want the Professor messing up her good outfits while in her
body. Maybe he would even pee in her pants - the silly, prissy little
sissy! Despite her fears Sarah was excited to be testing the device on
humans. An Ex boyfriend had called it an 'infernal' device.
Then everything was ready. Now to wait for the Prof! Which was not
easy. If it were to be done, it would be well if it were done quickly.
Was that McBeth or Lady McB who said that? Sarah wondered absently as
she checked and rechecked her watch again and again. At ten on the dot
Prof Asshole arrived! Damn but he was insufferable and she would have
to be him for most of the day!
Unfortunately he was with some one. She couldn't do it until he was
alone. God only knew what would happen if there were more than one
person present. Shit, listen to him pontificate! Would he ever shut up?
Yet another student came in ? then another. Poor Sarah's stomach
started churning. Would he ever be alone? This was her last chance to
change her grades. Tomorrow would be too late. Time clicked endlessly
on. Then.1030, 1035, 1040. At last he was alone!
She sighed with relief and pressed the button!
For a moment nothing happened and then was a feeling like no other. She
felt nothing and she saw nothing. Then she could see, breathe and feel!
Sarah blinked and it was behind horn rimmed glasses! It had WORKED! She
heard a female scream above her and grinned with savage satisfaction.
Then she frowned. Sarah hoped Professor Martin would not damage her
beautiful body! Now that was a horrid thought!
She got up on shaking legs and tried to gain coordination in this male
body. Sarah moved towards the door to go up and reassure and gloat to
Prof Asshole. Unfortunately the office door opened and Prof St. James
and Prof Hammerslogger came in.
"Professor Martin, we need a few moments of your time," said St James
who was the department head.
Sarah cleared her ? throat ? or rather Prof Martin's throat.
"Can't it wait? Something has popped up and I really need to leave?"
she said in Martin's plum, self satisfied tones. Now that was weird!
"It will just take a minute Charles. These are your office hours and
after all I am head of department," St James said jovially.
Sarah fumed inside but was helpless. What was Asshole doing with and in
her body? The two men were reminding her at great length that there was
an important meeting tomorrow and wanted Martin's support to deny
tenure to a woman instructor! It was hard but Sarah made herself keep
smiling and agreeing! After about 30 minutes they finally left. During
the whole time Sarah had felt like a cat on a hot tin roof afraid that
Asshole would come bursting in at any moment screaming like a banshee
even though she wrote in her note to wait for her outside the closet!
Then at last they went. Thanks god, she thought.
Puffing in Martin's body she ran up the stairs. He wasn't there! She
opened the closet. He wasn't inside. She backed out and looked up and
down the hall. No sign of her body anywhere. She turned on the light in
the closet and discovered her equipment was also missing. Then Sarah
spied a note. It was from Prof Martin, but written in her hand writing.
"I regret I was wrong and you were right. Shall we meet later tonight
in Classroom 233 at 7? I assume that will give you time to change your
grades."
Sarah was surprised. After the initial scream Prof Martin was handling
this better than she would have believed possible. Sarah shrugged and
hurried over to the Dean's office. It was weird to be a clumsy male
and so out of shape. The short walked tired her. Sarah arranged
Martin's face in his usual smug, superior smile. She told Mr. Ford, the
Dean's assistant:
"I want to change Miss Langley's grades." She was so nervous, but
relieved that she kept the male voice from tumbling.
The man smiled with obvious relief. "That's good. We all told you were
being unduly harsh to keep her from graduating. What made you change
your mind, Professor?"
With an effort Sarah keep herself smiling. Martin was a bigger Asshole
than she thought. He even went against the judgment of the college!
"I was totally wrong about Miss Langley," said Sarah with satisfaction.
"I agreed to test her theories and they were correct. She is absolutely
brilliant!"
Ford was startled. It was very unlike Martin to give praise to anyone
but himself. He handled the necessary paper work over. "You do
realize, Professor Martin that this must be the final grade. Things are
frozen at 6 o'clock?"
Sarah did know it. At seven when they met she and the Prof could switch
back and he couldn't do a damn thing about Sarah changing her grades.
She would graduate with honors and no harm done. If he didn't tell
anyone of the body swap ? which was very likely all would be well. If
he told anyone about the switch he would be a laughing stock in more
ways than one and she knew Prof Martin very well ? he did not like
being an object of fun or derision! If they were believed then he would
have to admit that she had been right and her brilliant invention had
done exactly as predicted. She'd be proved right and he foolishly
wrong. Her plan was perfect.
Sarah fumbled in Martin's pocket for his cellphone and then called her
apartment. Hopefully Martin was there. He wasn't but one of her
roommates was. It was really weird to hear her being fearful and
respectful to her.
"No sir, Sarah isn't in. I haven't seen her since this morning."
"Ask her to call me."
"Does she have your number, Professor?"
Sarah had to choke back a laugh. "I am sure she does!"
Chapter 3: The End?
Filled with unholy glee and triumphant over Prof Martin Sarah decided
to lunch in the faculty dining room! She had always been curious what
went on this "holy of holies". She would fool all the fools. She ate
an expensive lunch and had an expensive glass of wine after all Martin
was buying! She did not enjoy the lunch as much as she expected, as it
tasted rather bland. Sarah was glad to observe that Martin was not
popular with the other Professors as no one sat with her.
Her cellphone rang. It was her! Rather it was Professor Martin of
course. "My God was it weird to hear your own voice under some one
else's control!" Sarah thought.
"Any problems with changing your grades?" asked a musical, sexy voice.
"None."
"Excellent. Now, since you have made free with my body, life and career
I need a favor."
"What favor and why should I?"
"Because if you refuse. I will shave your hair off!" Came the calm
voice.
Sarah grew cold with fear. She shuddered. Not her crowning glory!
Everyone loved her long luxuriant hair. True she could harm Prof
Martin's body or rep too, but that sort of escalation could get very
easily out of hand.
"What do you want?" she asked.
"Something simple and easy. My wife is giving an important tea at four.
Please attend as me and do your best to pretend to be me. If you do, I
will promise no attempt at later retaliation." He proceeded to give her
instructions.
Grumbling Sarah took notes. Well she might was well do this as
something else. She couldn't give back this body until after 6 anyway!
She had planned to keep an eye on the Professor in her body but that
might be weird anyway. As she got up Sarah recognized some unpleasant
feelings. Shit! She had to take a shit in Martin's body! Gross!
Man did it hurt and continue hurting. She groaned! Just great, the
Asshole had hemorrhoids! Now Sarah felt justified going to the bank and
transferring 5 thousand to her account from Martin's. By the time the
fool found out it would be too late! It was the least she was owed
after all her emotional turmoil and the way he had almost ruined her
life ? plus of course the hemorrhoids.
The tea was even duller than Sarah expected. Thank God she didn't have
many afternoons like this. Mrs. Martin was colder than a frozen
mackerel! Every time Sarah tried to bring a little life to
conversations she caught the bitch staring at her. At least Mrs. Frozen
Ass didn't expect or wish any kisses or hugs from her.
At last Sarah was able to break away. What a relief! She glanced at the
nerdy watch on her wrist. It was a few minutes after 6. She was filled
with relief. No power on earth could now change her grade. She was home
free. Sarah still had an hour before the meeting with Professor Martin.
She needed a drink after that tea and to relax. It had been a stressful
day to say the very least. Stealing a professor's body, changing your
own grades and having tea with the witch of the frozen north and her
dead friends!
The horrified and opened mouth stares Sarah received going into her
usual student hangout brought her to her senses. This was no place for
her present body. Odd, she thought she saw 'herself' there, but that
was impossible. Professor Martin would hardly come in here! She went to
the sedate bar at the Hilton. Boring and expensive but she paid with
Martin's money.
She got into Martin's old Volvo and drove to the building housing the
classroom. She was very anxious to get back to herself. She hated this
ugly male body with its aches and pains as well as all the unpleasant
associations Professor Asshole had for her.
Sarah was 20 minutes early and was hoping Martin would come early, but
time ticked away and he didn't show with her beautiful body. She sure
hoped he hadn't made her look dorkie! She sighed. He probably wouldn't
show up until the precise time. His was an extremely Fileas Fogg like
obsession with punctuality. The classroom clock showed 7 at last! She
heard voices approaching. One voice sounded like hers ? and maybe some
giggling. Then she heard the tap of heels and her wonderful body
entered. Sarah dropped Professor Martin's jaw!
Martin had dressed her body in her sexiest outfit - a VERY tight,
revealing leather mini dress that empathized her great figure and her
high black leather boots with 3 inch heels.
He grinned her own impish grin at her and twirled.
"Pretty hot don't you think?" he said, her former dark eyes were bright
with mischief and excitement.
"Of course I do!" Sarah finally managed. "I am very surprised you dared
dress like that that is all."
"Why not, you do?"
Sarah then noticed two things. First Martin had got her body lit up. He
wasn't drunk but obvious had a few drinks. Two, he didn't have her
device with him.
"Where my mind switcher?" she asked in Martin's driest tones. "Are you
so drunk you forgot it?"
"What a prune! Of course I haven't forgotten it," Martin laughed gaily.
"It's in a very safe place."
"Where? We need it to change back?"
He laughed louder and stretched out Sarah's beautiful body seductively
full length across several desks and grinned impishly. "What makes you
think we are trading back?"
Sarah was horrified. "What are you saying?"
"Simply that if you were in my position, would you trade back? I think
not!"
Sarah was furious. "Why you bitch!" She yelled, moving forward. "I
won't let you get away with this!"
She started to shake her former body.
The apparent Sarah Langley screamed. "Mike, help! Professor Martin is
attacking me!"
Startled Sarah whirled around. Her boyfriend Mike, the linebacker for
the football team thundered into the classroom. His handsome face was
contorted with fury.
"Get your hands off her!" He yelled and Sarah felt his large fist
connect with her jaw and down she went on the floor. In a daze she
looked up to see Martin in her stolen, lost body embracing and kissing
Mike.
"My hero!" 'She' cried.
Mike swelled with pride. "Glad to it, darling! I didn't believe you
earlier when you said Martin was harassing you, but you were right! I
took the pictures of him attacking you with the video camera. What
now?"
Martin's beautiful stolen eyes were a sparkle. "Well sweetheart, we go
to the police station and get a restraining order against him of
course! Thank God I can count on a strong, handsome man like you, my
darling Michael. A helpless girl likes me needs protection from evil
men like Professor Martin." She cooed seductively.
Mike swelled with pride and kissed the beautiful girl. "Oh, Sarah
darling, when you said you'd dump those other guys and be my girl it
made me the happiest man in the world. If I get a pro contract we can
afford to get married."
"No, Mike you don't understand!" Sarah said, but Mike ignored her. This
was horrible. This was going from terrible to uber terrible!"
Sarah saw her lost beautiful face bent over her and where Mike could
not see she saw Martin wink at her.
"Yes, if it's any of your business we are tentatively engaged!" The new
Sarah hugged the handsome, young man affectionately.
"You won't get away with this!" Cried a furious Sarah to the beautiful
young girl gracefully exiting; her high heels boots made a clicking
sound of triumph! "I will win somehow you bitch!" Then they were gone.
"Somehow I will get my body back and I will never be ugly again!" Sarah
vowed.
The End?
Is there a part 2? If enough people want one I will write it.
This story is inspired by GENSABI'S CLASSIC PHOTO/CAPTION WEIRD SCIENCE
It's on his new page since Lycos shut down.
Eisley
- 19.05.2022
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