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March Madness By Jena Corso Edited By Angela Meyers Chapter 2 Mike's mind was racing as he sat in the passenger seat, staring out the window as he found himself about to be thrust into a night scene where he had little experience, even as his male persona. He was doubting the crazy choice he had made, knowing he was moments away from holding the arm of a man he barely knew while spying on his girlfriend, and at the same time trying blend into the scenery. As the car pulled up, it was ever so strange having his door opened for him, and even more odd feeling the cool evening air whisk right through his hose the moment he lifted his right leg from the vehicle. As he steadied his heel on the pavement and pulled himself to a standing position, the goose bumps seemed to instantly pop from his skin as he quickly found himself on Stuart's arm as he stepped to the curb, softly clenching Stuart's bicep. They walked the length of a lit pathway before cautiously he was led up a dozen steps as he could have never have imagined what a comforting feeling it was to have a gentlemen's warm hand on his bare chilled shoulder blades, steadying him as they entered the event. His eyes quickly wandered, scanning the large crowd as quickly people scurried over to Stuart as he found himself in the middle of meaningless introductions and faux kisses. Mike could barely process any names nor did anyone care who he was, yet they seemed more curious that he was with Stuart. It was a good forty minutes of mingling until he finally spotted Jen across the room, drinking and engaging in conversation. He had sipped some champagne but felt no effects as his senses were razor sharp, watching her every move. He still didn't care for her short cut but had to admit to himself she looked amazingly beautiful, like a starlet appearing so modern and chic with the new hairdo and sexy dress, even though it was so hard to see her hanging on another man's arm and his concentration on her was constantly interrupted as he had no choice but to do the same. "Stuart darling. I can hardly believe it," said a woman coming over and breaking his gaze. "Tell me I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing." "Martha, I'll tell you anything you want to hear, but believe me, your eyes are not deceiving you," said Stuart. "Michelle, please meet one of my oldest friends, Martha." "Oh darling you must be really something if you can get him to parade you around," said Martha, hugging Mike. "She's simply ravishing, Stuart." "Thank you Martha." Stuart put his arm around Mike and kissed his cheek. "She's an amazing woman." "That dress is exquisite, Michelle. It's a Versace," said Martha. "Isn't it?" "Oh, I'm not sure," said Mik,e making small talk. "It's something I slipped into last minute." "Versace? Last minute? No need to be so modest, dearie. We're all in one designer or another tonight." Martha rolled her eyes at Mike. "We all know that tulle dresses like that capture the magic of the label's iconic glamour. Back in my hay day, I had a body like yours as well. Have a nice evening you too." "What did I say?" whispered Mike as Stuart covered his mouth to avoid breaking out laughing as Martha turned her back on them. "Scrawny bitch," huffed Martha under her breath as she waved as she turned walking away. As the waiter passed by, Mike grabbed a few glasses of champagne, sipping quickly as he again turned his attention watching Jen. Not a lot was happening as he just hung on Stuart's arm, smiling silently from conversation to conversation as he was happy to avoid anything more than small talk, and was being paraded around the room without issue. "Take me down that corridor," Mike whispered to Stuart as he watched Jen head that way with Enrique. "I want to see what she's up to down there. Looks like they're headed for a more private spot." "Ok, but let's not get that close, as remember we do know each other and she may approach me to say hi," said Stuart. "I doubt it," said Mike, annoyed and giving Stuart a nudge. "She barely strayed from that same asshole all night and has been in with the same little click of losers. Let's go!" They strolled down the hallway, keeping a safe distance as Enrique and Jen turned, heading out on a balcony as they settled near a small bar near the French doors that lead outside. Mike leaned back against the wall, finding an angle where he could peek outside through a large potted palm plant. He could see them talking and laughing as he stared intently, as it was the first time Jen and Enrique were truly alone. "We can't stand in this dreadful spot all night?" said Stuart looking at his watch. "I'm going to go meet with a few people and then I'll meet up with you later." "I can't stand in a corner alone," Mike replied. "At least if you're here it looks like we're having a private conversation." "Five more minutes, and then I have to get back to the event." Stuart rolled his eyes. "I said I'd bring you here. Not babysit you!" "Wait! Shit! They're coming in," said Mike, seeing them moving towards them as he peaked through the leaves. "They're not coming this way are they?" "Uuumm, yeah! They just made eye contact with me," said Stuart. "You better hustle away. I think they're coming over to say hello. Quick, the ladies room is right down the hall!" "Holy shit!" cried Mike, panicking. "I can't move quickly in these fucking shoes and this tight dress. I'm barely walking holding your arm. If I try to even walk fast, I'll be on my ass and then what." "Well, you better come up with something quickly," said Stuart, peeking out of his left eye. "They're definitely headed this way." "Shit! Shit!" Mike was shaking and then grabbed Stuart's hand, pulling him slightly behind the plant. "Hide me!" Quickly Mike reached his arm around Stuart's neck and pressed his lips against Stuart's. He forcefully pulled Stuart's body against his as he pinned himself against the wall, holding on to Stuart's neck with one hand and his back with the other as he hid his face from view behind Stuart's mimicking a passionate kiss. He peeked open one eye for a moment, seeing them kind of bewildered as they seemed to be checking out the passionate couple without trying to stare. Mike quickly closed his peeking eye, digging his fingers into Stuart's hair, slightly twisting his neck to make sure as little of his face could be seen, as he had little choice moving his lips and mouth. After another twenty seconds, Mike peeked open one eye, again noticing they were gone and quickly pushed Stuart off of him. "Wow, now that was some serious hiding," teased Stuart, smiling as he stepped back. "I never realized what a passionate date you'd be tonight. Am I in for any more surprises? I love surprises." "That's not funny, asshole," said Mike angrily, seeing his lipstick smeared all over Stuart's face, trying to compose himself. "I had no choice. You know that. It was nothing." "Well it may have been, but the mess on your face says something a bit different," said Stuart, tucking in his messy shirt before wiping his face and putting out his arm. "Come on, we better both go freshen up because we certainly can't go back out there like this." Mike wiped his face with his finger tips and took Stuart's arm, heading for the rest rooms. He quickly entered the ladies room, almost stunned at what a wreck he looked inside and began repairing his lips. He easily wiped his face, reapplied his lipstick and gloss before he did his best at fixing his blush and sprayed his hair. When he came back out, Stuart was waiting anxiously for him as quickly he was back on his arm. "Much better," Stuart teased. "Who knew you'd be so frisky, and quite the little hussy." "I'm sorry. I panicked," said Mike, feeling ill. "I can't believe I did that either, but can we not talk about that and just pretend it never happened. It was all I could think of last second." "Well, it's all I can think of now," Stuart grinned as they went back into the room. "Whether that happened on purpose or not, your spontaneity has put me in an odd position." "I'm sorry. I know I owe you big time for everything tonight," said Mike nervously. "Wait, what type of position?" "We'll talk about that later," replied Stuart as he was being approached by a group of people. "No need to worry. Look." Mike glanced over, seeing Jen across the room getting on her coat and leaving with Enrique. There wasn't much he could do now as he had to smile and again enter into small talk, stuck with a group of Stuart's boring friends. "Ok, come on I want to follow them," whispered Mike into Stuart's ear. "You're kidding, Michelle," Stuart said, not yet ready to leave. "I can't just run out without saying goodnight to some people." "Please, we have to," said Mike, tugging him towards the door. "Hurry up before I lose them. I'll make all this up to you some other time. I promise." Stuart shrugged as they quickly headed outside, handing the valet kid some money for his keys and by passing having the car brought up. They got in his car as they looked across the parking lot, seeing Jen just sitting in the passenger seat of Enrique's car with it's motor running. They both slouched down as Mike adjusted the rear view and side mirrors, watching them just sit and talk. This went on and on as they whispered to each other, trying to read lips and watching their every move. "What are we learning here?" whined Stuart. "We've been sitting here twenty minutes, and all they're doing is talking. They're just friends doing nothing but bullshitting." "I hope you're right, but they are sitting kind of close," said Mike. "And he did have her by the hand as they walked. We both saw that!" "Oh stop, I got more action from you tonight, and you're not even my type dressed like this," teased Stuart. "Not funny Stuart. I thought we agreed to forget about that," said Mike. "Please let that go and I told you I'll owe you some other time." "I told you you're not my type, but the crazy part is I'm still hard as a rock," said Stuart. "It's kind of interesting don't ya think!" "No, and that's way more than I need to know," said Mike, annoyed. "Just help me do my surveillance please." "The thing is, I used to have a thing for this sexy little female impersonator. Oh he was amazing! Come on...look what you've done to me," said Stuart, unzipping his pants. "And you...well you all dressed up like this reminds me of him." "What the hell are you doing?" said Mike, sliding back towards the passenger door, repulsed. "Put that away! Are you nuts?" "No, just very aroused," said Stuart, grabbing Mike's hand chuckling and touching his manhood as he playfully pulled him towards him. "Look at how hard I am. Look what you've done to me. Just feel that shit. You said you owe me anyway. Come on, just a few strokes will do." "Are you insane? You know that's not what I meant! Stop, this isn't funny--," said Mike as he now found his fingers interlocked with Stuart's around his penis, before he heard a horn honk and looked up. "Oh shit, duck," yelled Stuart pushing down on his head. Stuart rolled down the window, seeing Jen with her car double parked across from his, with her windows rolled down staring over at him. "So what's up Stuart?" Jen grinned. "I thought this was your car running!" "Jen, how wonderful to see you here," said Stuart. "How have you been? I thought I saw you across the room at the party tonight, but I was stuck in so many boring conversations, I had trouble seeing everyone." "Yeah, I was there and I saw you parading some leggy brunette all over," said Jen. "So what's going on with that? I was heading over to say hi but by the time I got over there, you looked a little busy cleaning her tonsils out." "Oh sorry about that?" said Stuart, fumbling for an excuse. "I ah. I ahh." "Oh stop, no need to explain," said Jen. "I'm happy for you but I had no idea you...you ah.. you know switched teams." "Yeah well neither does my mother," said Stuart, feeling some pleasure. "Believe me, she's been praying for years!" "Yeah, well mine too for me to settle down, but hopefully that'll change for the better soon," said Jen, rolling her eyes. "Things just haven't been as I thought they'd be lately, so I've got a lot on my mind but maybe we'll meet up soon and chat about all that." "I'd love that because now's kind of not a good time," said Stuart, tensing up and hearing a gagging sound. "Oh shit! I'm so sorry." Jen covered her mouth, giggling as his elbow buckled, moving up under a layer of curls as she now detected the top of Mike's head. "That's not what I thi--!" "Well?" uttered Stuart, embarrassed. "I didn't realize I interrupted. So sorry," said Jen, getting flushed as she put the car in drive, shaking her head. "Call you soon. Bye. So sorry!" Jen was laughing as she sped off, while Stuart released his elbow before exploding as Mike screamed, as his entire face was being saturated by semen as no way could he pull back that fast. "Uuuugggg. Holy fucking shiiiiiiitttttt!" cried Mike, disgusted beyond belief, holding up his hand and ready to scream. "Easy relax," said Stuart with a chuckle. "I've got napkins and tissues. Here take them. Take them all." "You kidding? I can't see. It's everywhere. I'm fucking covered. How the hell could you do that!" "I'm sorry," laughed Stuart. "That's never happened before like that, but I just couldn't hold back. You should have let go and stopped rubbing it across your face." "Let go!" screamed Mike. "You were squeezing my hand on it, and all I was trying to do was not let it touch me." Mike was grossed out, quickly wiping himself and then trying to regain his composure as Stuart zipped himself up. He folded down the lit vanity mirror, never happier to fix his face as he took a few deep breaths, barely saying a word. "So look at the bright side," said Stuart as he began driving. "You know she didn't go home with him." "Really, she could be driving to his place right now," said Mike. "I'll never know because obviously I can't come home to her like this, just in case she's there. And if you weren't so fucking horny, you could have pumped her for information as she seemed ready to spill to you!" "I guess that's true," said Stuart. "But I'm pretty sure if anything was happening she would have been all over him in that car. Look how easily it happens with us, and we weren't even into each other." "Nothing happened! And whatever did kind of happened accidentally," said Mike. "I'm in disguise and why the hell did you whip that shit out. What is wrong with you?...Wait, you're supposed to be gay. What the fuck is going on in your head." "A moment of weakness I guess for a pretty girl...who by the way happens to be pretty well hung," teased Stuart with a thick belly laugh. "Plus, you don't kiss like a gir,l maybe that was it. Seriously that was kind of hot with you being stuck down there with all the tension of her chatting with me. I mean if you were really a good girlfriend you could have wrapped your lips around me instead of me just smacking it off your face, but I guess we'll save that for our next date." "What an asshole you can be," said Mike, still annoyed and trying to wipe up every ounce. "Like I'd ever do this again." "Since you're still not sure, I'd bet you would in a heartbeat," said Stuart. "You'd have to or you'd lose your mind. You know it and I know it, and I doubt a little squirt in the eye would stop you!" "Never again," replied Mike, finally letting loose a little smile and having doubts in his mind. "You did say it was nothing, right?" "I can't believe you're this naive. No wonder she's out prancing around on you!" Teased Stuart. "That's not funny and you just said she wasn't," Mike slapped his forehead. "Did you think the guy she was with was gay. I'm usually good with my gaydar, but you're the expert?" "Expert maybe. I've been quietly out of the closet for years honey, and I'm still shocked from time to time about people," said Stuart, patting Mike's thigh. "I don't run around publicizing it, but I've been out at events with my boyfriend's for years and never seen him out before, so I'm not sure. I'd need to meet him and chat so I could give you a better evaluation, but it's hard to tell because they didn't go public with anything intimate like we did." "I think our kiss was more private than that," whined Mike, feeling sick. "At least I hope it was!" "You'd think so, but do you think I got so much attention just with you on my arm tonight?" said Stuart grinning. "Many people were shocked, including your girlfriend and trust me, many people saw that and certainly I'm sure the news made its way through the room. Here if you look at my phone, you'll see all the buzz!" "So you're saying people thought I was a drag queen like you mentioned?" asked Mike, surprised. "Nope! Not a one!" said Stuart. "That's the interesting part for both of us. You looked and still look incredible. By the way, you do realize the night's over so I'm kind of curious why you just fixed your lipstick in the mirror when we're on your way home?" "Because it tastes better than your freaking jizz you jerk, and as you know I'm paranoid in case we somehow meet up with anyone else, so what the hell else was I to do except clean myself up?" Mike looked at his reflection. "Just take me home so I can get out of all this crap. I've had more than enough." Mike was pretty silent the rest of the ride home as he slipped off his shoes and ran barefoot, carrying his heels into the house. He texted Jen a few times to no avail, and began stripping off his clothes and extensions. He felt so much better after he got out of the shower and fell asleep sitting up in his recliner, physically and mentally wiped out. In the morning, the first thing he did was brush his teeth again and again a few times, trying to remove any memories of last night. He looked at his phone, seeing a reply from Jen to give her a call and he quickly dialled her up. "Hey hon," said Mike as she answered. "How was your night out?" "Oh really fun, and how were the games," said Jen. "I'm sure you didn't miss a minute, but I thought you'd be here so we could talk when I got home, but obviously you went back to your place." "Oh, yeah, well I thought you were pissed at me so I left," said Mike. "I was, so maybe it was better but I guess we really do need to talk," said Jen. "I have a lot to do today, but I thought we could spend some time together today and maybe flesh out some things. I'm pretty wiped, but I know the championship is tomorrow, so obviously today might be better." "Oh definitely," said Mike, looking down as his nail extensions. "I'd really like that, but I'm going to need some time to get my shit together?" "What shit?" asked Jen, annoyed. "I'm on my way for Starbucks. Why don't I just stop by and we'll clear the air on some things." "No, now's a bad time hon," said Mike, looking at his reflection with thick false lashes still on his face. "Just give me a little time and I'll come to you. Maybe even tomorrow is better. Screw the game. I'll take you to dinner." "What the fuck is going on Mike? Since when can't I come right over?" Jen was getting pissed. "It's almost like you have another girl there or something?" "No, there's no girl here!" said Mike. "You're my girl!" "Am I?" said Jen sarcastically. "And why would you all of a sudden give up your biggest game of the year for me. Must be some serious guilt trip going on. I'm not looking for your sympathy, asshole. Plus, I already figured you'd be busy for the game, so I have plans that night. So sorry... I'm not available." "Don't tell me?" said Mike, getting pissed. "Could it be with Enrique again?" "If you must know, yes," said Jen. "It's the biggest fashion gala of the year, and we're going. Don't worry they do it on purpose during the biggest basketball game of the year, so that men like you won't try to come and ruin a good time for the rest of us that don't give a shit about sports. Have fun with whosever there today, but I'm sure it's just your idiot friends and we'll chat in a few days. That should give both of us a well needed break to sort out if we've got anything left to talk about!" "Jen, stop. Jen, hello!" screamed Mike into the phone as she hung up and turned off her phone. Mike threw the phone across the room and then sat down for a while. His mind raced for a few minutes and then he starting thinking and then calmed himself down, picking up and dialing the phone. "Good Morning, Stuart, it's Mike" "Oh, good morning," said Stuart happily. "So what do I owe the pleasure of this wake up call on this sunny morning? Last time I saw you, my lovely date was running from my car." "Sorry about that," said Mike, feeling bad. "You know it was a rough night." "Well not for me, but I understand," Stuart laughed. "So what's up? I'm sure you're not calling for a second date?" "Well of course not, but maybe," said Mike, all embarrassed. "Thing is we had a big fight this morning already, and now she's going to some big gala fashion show tomorrow night. You wouldn't be going to that as well would you?" "Are you kidding! That's one of the most exclusive events of the year, and one hottest tickets in the city. It's amazing, and I've been to it a number of times. Originally I was going with my boyfriend, but since my now ex-boyfriend is going to be there, I got rid of my tickets," said Stuart. "Wait, are you asking me to take you there?" "Well kind of," said Mike sheepishly. "Is it possible?" "What happened to never again?" said Stuart with a chuckle. "How about maybe I should call her first and see if I can get some dirt for you? She did want to talk last night?" "You're killing me, Stuart! Don't you think I'd rather you call and do that, but I know that's not happening? "Whenever we have a fight, her phone goes off and it won't be coming on anytime soon! She's so freaking stubborn and hot headed, so I can't waste time not knowing. So you could get us in?" "Ok, I you know better than I do, so let me understand you and let's be crystal clear," Stuart said. "Are you asking me out on a date with 'Michelle' again?" "Come on, Stuart," said Mike, getting pissed. "Say again dear?" Stuart giggled. "And you are going to owe me big time on this one!" "You know I hate you," said Mike, giving in. "I'd like to know if you'd go out with me again... Wait, I mean 'Michelle' would like to know if you'd take her out again to the fashion gala tomorrow night." "Much better," said Stuart. "I'd love to take 'Michelle' out again. That was really fun!" "So can you get us in or not!" asked Mike, frustrated. "I told you it's like the hardest gala to get into, but believe it or not my mother is on the board," said Stuart. "So I'll call her since you are this desperate, but you should know she's a big pain in the ass and she's still pissed about me blowing it off to begin with. Now I'll have to come up with a story about how I changed my mind." "Thanks, so you'll call her now?" Mike asked. "Sure," said Stuart. "What the hell. I'll call you right back!" "Thanks," said Mike as they hung up. Mike sat there anxiously waiting for Stuart to call for a good half hour. He was dying inside as finally the phone rang and he answered, seeing it was Stuart on the caller id. "So you're sure about this right?" Stuart asked as Mike answered. "I don't think I have a choice," said Mike. "Well you were right about her phone, because I called her twice and it's definitely off," said Stuart. "You better be 100% sure, because this is going to cost both of us!" "Yes, I have to be there, as I think things might escalate that night," said Mike. "I need to know everything, and hopefully I can save it after that." "Ok, then hold on I have Mom on the other line, and she's no picnic," Stuart clicked his call waiting. Mike sat for a good five minutes on pins and needles as he waited for Stuart. Finally he clicked back over as he heard Stuart's voice. "Michelle, say hi to my mother, Evelyn," said Stuart. "Oh Michelle, I'm so excited to meet you. You have no idea how long I've waited to meet a girlfriend of his," said Evelyn. "You must be really something special for my son to want to bring you to the gala." "Oh thank you Evelyn," said Mike in his mousiest voice. "I can't wait to meet you tomorrow as well." "Nonsense dear. I told my son I'll have you two love birds over for lunch today," "I know you've never been to anything like this before, so we'll talk and I'll help guide you on what to wear. I'm so excited. Can you be here by noon?" "Mom, it's almost ten," said Stuart. "Let's give Michelle a little time to get ready and let's say 1pm, ok?" "No problem, honey," said Evelyn. "I'm just excited to meet her. You've kept me waiting so long, so what's another hour." "Bye, bye mom," said Stuart. "See you at 1pm," Evelyn said as she clicked off. "Before you panic, I've already texted Sonia and she's on her way to pick you up," said Stuart. "Go take a shower if you haven't already, and I'll pick you up at her place at quarter to one." "This is nuts," Mike yelled. "I have to meet your mother as your girlfriend!" "You want to go to this gala or not," replied Stuart. "Trust me, this will be worse on me than it will on you. She's been waiting years for me to bring a girl home." "But I'm not a girl," said Mike. "What if she figures that out and doesn't she know you're gay!" "She knows, but she's never really accepted it so no matter what she'll be thrilled with you," said Stuart. "Now just move your ass, as this has now disrupted my entire day!" Mike took a shower, scrubbing off the last remnants of the night before and wasn't out long before Sonia had arrived. He was in old sweats and a t-shirt as she drove them to her place, and he quickly found himself back in her makeup chair. She lathered his face and ever so carefully shaved him a few times, removing any morning stubble and then he sat relaxing as she covered him in a pasty moisturizer. "I knew we should have done a little more adhering yesterday, as that would have saved us time today Michelle," said Sonia, cleaning around his breasts. "You told me you were done, but obviously you lied." "Sonia, I didn't," said Mike as he felt stickiness around his nipples. "None of this was planned. You know that." "Maybe not this lunch, but tomorrow is planned! No?" said Sonia, cleaning his face. "Yes, well yes I'll be dressing up again tomorrow night if that's what you're asking," replied Mike. "No dear," said Sonia, pressing at the right side of his chest with some force. "You'll be dressing from now until then if you're out in public, as once this glue sets it's not coming off that easily. No point taking these on and off as your chest is already bruised from the adhesive yesterday. This way I'll get them to hold perfectly, because I'm sure they'll need to look flawless in whatever you're in tomorrow. It is a fashion gala, so assume you're going to be in something extravagant." "Oh just great," Mike said as she was pressing on the left breast. Finally when she stopped pressing, she returned working on his face. She began blending in his foundation and then turned her attention to his lids and cheeks. He sat patiently as she took her pencil to his waterline and coated his lashes multiple times. She then returned her attention to his lips, outlining them before filling in some color. He could hardly believe the weight tugging at his chest as she elevated his chair and had him stand. He looked down at how they jiggled just a bit, but felt instant relief as she slipped his arms through a violet bra. She took a few moments adjusting the straps at his shoulder blades and then had him set into a matching panty. "Stay soft on me honey," Sonia told him as she pushed his testicles inside his cavity and pulled him back, snapping the waist band. "This gaff will hold nicely, so just make sure you put everything back the way I have it if you have to pee." She walked back to the front of her boutique and returned with a few outfits on hangers. It didn't look too bad as he soon found himself in some pants she liked and then he tried on a few tops. "This is so cute on you. Step into these and I think this will be perfect for lunch with your boyfriend's mom," Sonia Told him as she dropped a pair of pumps at his feet. "Hold the edge of the slacks while you step in." "Not funny, Sonia," Mike stepped in. "Glad you're enjoying all this." "It's just a job honey, but who says work can't be fun. Plus, remember I'm on the clock," said Sonia, looking at her watch and pointing back towards her chair. "Ok, hair, accessories, and you're ready for lunch. No surprises tomorrow, so be here early as we'll a lot need time to get you really done up for the big night." "Ok, ok," said Mike putting up his hand and walking back to her salon chair. "Let me just make it through today first please." "Good point, but I'm sure you'll be fine, pretty girl," said Sonia, wrapping her cape over him and spritzing his hair as she began combing through it. After a few minutes, she pushed his head forward and he felt two little snaps at the base of his neck as the first extension went in. She was humming to the music as she guided her flat iron down his back before horizontally parting his hair above it, and this time he felt three snaps as the next one went in. Each weft got a little bigger as she worked her way up, straightening each section with her flat iron as his ears were now covered. Finally after the fourth large section, she was parting his hair on the left and snapping in smaller sections as she worked on the heavy right side. It was amazing how she blended them with his real hair and then tugged forcefully on his own hair as she flat ironed it right in front of his eyes. "You'll be cute in bangs," Sonia said, holding her fingers like scissors in front of his eyes before blending them to the side and spraying them heavily. "Maybe you should have been a comedian, Sonia," said Mike as she covered his eyes, saturating his head. "Good one honey," said Sonia, changing his earrings before spinning his chair towards the mirror and snapping the flat iron open and shut a few times near his waitline. "And maybe you should have been something different too. You'd make a cute waitress or secretary. I can flat iron that little problem right off if you'd like." "Again, you crack me up," replied Mike, rolling his eyes as she began peeling the back of some nails and pressing them on him. She matched finger after finger until she finished, and then slipped a series or rings on him and a number of bracelets on his right wrist. "I know, but for now I won't quit my day job because otherwise who could make you this beautiful," said Sonia, pulling of his cape. "Behold a pretty lady about to meet the boyfriend's mama." Mike stood with his hands on his hips, admiring a very neat, well dressed ordinary looking woman staring back at him. He looked so tall and lean as he was now in simple black straight leg slacks, which were snug in the rear framing his buttocks with no pockets, and hemmed longer than his foot. His pointy closed toed pump had a four inch thin heel, keeping the hem two inches from the floor and revealed just a little skin above the toes. On top he was in a fitted long sleeve silk lavender blouse with a slight scoop neck revealing no cleavage, but certainly hugging his new assets before tapering in at his waist. His eyes had been done with violet outer edges and pastel creases behind thick lashes and thinly lined pupils. His cheeks were a darker, almost cranberry blended blush, and his lips done in a matte purple, which was a shade or two lighter than his blouse. His long brunette hair shone like a beacon from the glossy spray, as his natural hair and perfectly matched wefts had been blended and flat ironed pin straight style. This simple everyday type look sat thickly on each shoulder and half way down his back, featuring an offset side part and next to his long side bangs which he knew was his natural hair. Just like the night before, it went from dark to light as his brunette base faded into a sandy blonde at the tips, keeping with yesterday's multi-tonal style. Above each shoulder, large silver hoop earrings peeked out, and on his right wrist was a thick chain like costume silver bracelet. His nails were covered with square tip acrylic press ons, which were an ombre blend of silver and purple, and his fingers had a few silver costume stone rings on each hand. "Holy crap, my boobs look so big in this," Mike exclaimed, using his nail tip to sweep his hair from his eye as he moved. "I think you made them too big, Sonia." "Oh, no, I think they look just right," said Stuart, coming in as Mike twisted around seeing him. "I think they just look a little perky, because you've really got no hips," said Sonia, spraying on his perfume. "Most girls would kill for your figure. You'll adjust to being a little bodacious, as depending on what you're in tomorrow I'd rather have something that can actually hold up a dress on your twiggy figure." "Great?" whined Mike taking his purse. "Well let's go meet the wicked witch," teased Stuart, putting out his arm. "This should be quite entertaining!" "Did you just call your mother a witch?" asked Mike as they walked out together. "Trust me, that's being kind," said Stuart. "But you'll see for yourself." Mike was extremely nervous as they drove to Stuart's mothers' house. As they pulled up at a well-manicured round driveway, he looked up, realizing they had serious money and stepped out as Stuart opened his door. "I guess we should hold hands, right," said Mike, slightly trembling as he initiated sliding his fingers between Stuart's. "If you insist, Michelle," Stuart answered as he slipped his key in the door and they entered. "OMG!!! Come in. Come in," said Evelyn, hurrying down a long circular stair case and immediately hugging and kissing Mike. "She's so beautiful, Stuart." "Thank you, and it's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Silverstein," said Mike as she grabbed both his hands and looked into his eyes. "No, the pleasure is all mine dear, and call me Evelyn," Evelyn wiped her bright red lipstick from his cheek and then took him by the hand. "Please come sit with me. We have so much to talk about." Mike shot a look of terror over at Stuart as he found himself quickly seated on a love seat with Stuart, as Evelyn sat across from them. "Get comfortable, you two," said Evelyn, staring him up and down. "Don't mind me, I know you're adults." "Mother?" Stuart said, giving her a look. "What a beautiful home you have, Evelyn," said Mike, struggling to cross his leg over the other but finally getting it done with no package in the way. "It's so lovely you having us over at the last minute, but we won't stay long as of course I wouldn't want to impose." "Are you kidding! You can stay all day honey! My son tells me nothing, and I can't believe he hid you from me, so there's no rush at all." "I want to know everything about you dear. How did you meet? How long have you kids been dating? You have no idea how happy you've made me Stuart. Details please." "Well we met through some mutual friends, mom," said Stuart as he began stretching things that were somewhat true. "We've never had anything but a spectacular date." "Oh, that's amazing," said Evelyn on cloud nine. "Was it love at first sight? Has my son finally embraced some romance?" "We've known each other for years, but only the last year or LESS," emphasized Mike, looking at Stuart with a smile. "Has it been this uuumm ...well let's say unexpected to where we are now with our relationship." "Yes, she's the unpredictable type, mom," said Stuart, putting his arm around Mike and leaning in, giving a quick soft kiss on the lips. "She full of surprises." "And he's full of many things himself," said Evelyn as they talked and shared some lunch. They talked for a good hour as everyone relaxed, until finally Stuart interrupted, lifting the dishes to the kitchen. "Leave them, dear," said Evelyn. "I'll take care of that." "No, let me Evelyn, and I'll need to use the powder room please," said Mike, barely able to hold it any longer. "Just leave it dear, and it's upstairs second door on the left," said Evelyn smiling. Mike smiled, taking his purse and gingerly made his way up the stairs. "So?" said Stuart, grinning as his mother stared at him. "So she's lovely and I really like her," Evelyn replied, shooting him a look. "But?" said Stuart, knowing her too well. "But you might be able to fool most people, but I'm you mother and no one knows you better than me," said Evelyn matter of factly. "So are you screwing with me, or do you really like her?" "Mom, come on!" cried Stuart. "Stuart, she's gorgeous but I know Sonia's work all too well," Evelyn grinned. "Remember I financed that boutique, so tell me it's not?" "I can't, but please let's not go there mom," said Stuart looking down. "Fine honey, but obviously I don't know how far along she is, but if I know you, she's still got what you want underneath doesn't she?" said Evelyn. "Or should I be fully elated here?" "Mother, I am not talking about shit like this with you?" said Stuart, getting annoyed. "And I am not letting you interfere in my relationships. Remember you promised you wouldn't." "Ok, ok but she's a goyem too, isn't she?" said Evelyn. "I can tell, you know!" "MOM!" screamed Stuart, getting pissed. "Oh Vey, whatever as long as she'd covert to the tribe!" said Evelyn calming down. "Ok, mom you're so out of control!" said Stuart, storming upstairs. "That's it. Tell her I'll be right back." "Stuart?" Evelyn called out as he ran upstairs. "Don't be like that! It's a special day, and I really like her." She sat back down sipping her tea and finally Mike wandered back in. "He'll be right back, dear," said Evelyn. "Sit with me honey. You're certainly an interesting and beautiful young lady." "Thank you," said Mike. "You've made me feel so comfortable." "Yes, like part of the family, right mother," said Stuart coming back in. "Oh, of course dear," said Evelyn. "I'm sure she'll be welcome in any family, she's so sweet." "I'm glad you feel that way, mother," said Stuart, getting on one knee and reaching in his pocket. "Michelle, you'll make a wonderful addition to our family." "You're kidding, Stuart." Mike was astonished as Stuart took his left hand, seeing the ring in the other. "Not in the least," Stuart gave his mother a look as he slipped the ring over Mike's frozen finger. "Michelle, will you marry me?" "I, I," Mike stuttered as he couldn't even utter a full word, stunned as Stuart kissed him. He peeked over, seeing the tears in his mother's eyes as he felt Stuart's tongue enter his mouth and was in no position to fight as he found himself in a deep kiss. When it broke, Evelyn practically jumped from her seat, hugging him as she was sobbing, and he was crying, as his emotions were that of shock and not knowing how to handle this. "It's your grandmother's ring," sobbed Evelyn, taking Mike's hand and then holding her heart. "I can hardly believe this is happening." "Me either," Mike said from behind another hug as Stuart was whispering to him to calm down. Finally, Evelyn released him and composed herself, taking a few deep breaths before kissing her son. She then grabbed her phone from the table and began texting a rapidly. "So I'm looking forward to the rest of the day together, Michelle," Evelyn was ecstatic. "This is so exciting." "What, huh?" said Mike, shaking his head. "The day?" "Yes, I just got you two included to my nephew's bar mitzvah this evening," said Evelyn. "No way am I hiding this wonderful news. Stuart was originally invited, but he always declines. Now that'll he'll have a beauty like you to parade around with him, he's got no reason to ever stay away again." "Mom, no, we had plans," said Stuart. "Plus I already told them I couldn't make it." "No you didn't, and who cares what you told them before. You just surprised her. And even if you did, they just changed because I'm not keeping her closeted up for a second," said Evelyn, squeezing Mike's face lovingly. "Now let me grab my bag and I'll get Francine to squeeze her in with me." "Who's Francine, and where are you going?" asked Stuart as Evelyn grabbed Mike's hand. "You should remember. She's my manicurist, and you've been to her like twenty times. She can't go showing off that rock with those cheap extensions," said Evelyn, lifting Mike's hand and staring at his nails. "Oh Vey! No offense honey." "Ok?" said Mike, looking down at his fingers before Evelyn grabbed his hand. "Now go find a nice suit while we're getting our nails done, and we find your finance a dress for tonight," said Evelyn, tossing Mike his purse. "I can't show either of you off to the family like this!" Mike was speechless as he was being dragged from the house by Evelyn as she was calling anyone she knew on her cell phone. They drove through a ritzy neighborhood until finally they pulled up a posh nail salon. "Ladies, meet my soon to be daughter in law," squealed Evelyn as he was being hugged and kissed by people he didn't even know as they got inside. It was strange to be gushed at by strange women before it finally settled down and he found himself having his nails soaked. He mostly smiled silently as Evelyn never shut up while they slaved over him, massaging and moisturizing his hands. It was odd feeling how soft his fingers had become, as it really was nothing like the quick treatment he got from Sonia. He couldn't stop looking at the ring on his finger, and couldn't wait to see Stuart later to hear what crazy plan he had in mind, as pretending to be more than a girlfriend was never on the agenda. He had almost dozed off from all the strong scents until he looked down, seeing the clear coat being applied to his left pinky, and then watched as his entire hand went under the dryer. "Much more appropriate to show off that wondrous stone, Michelle," said Evelyn, inspecting his nails. "I know they're a bit longer than you had before, but after a few weeks, if their too much, you can cut them down a bit, but I think you'll adjust to them. We'll work something out so you can come with me every Friday, ok sweetie!" "Sure," said Mike, trying to figure out how the hell these would come off as the dryer ticked off. He looked down now, seeing the ultra-glossy French manicure that now graced his fingers, thinking how could he ever pick up anything? The white square tips extended his nails a good inch past his natural finger tips, and the natural base sparkled in every direction. Embedded beneath the clear gloss, a thin glittery line separated the white tip and the taupe nail, and a few tiny diamond like chips decorated just the outer edges of each tips. "Keep your nails fanned and this is a little special treat from Mrs. Silverstein," said a Korean woman, lowering the back of his chair. "Don't get offended, dear," said Evelyn. "But they're hideous. Just relax, and trust me you'll feel so much better after they fix them." Mike looked up, seeing two strings between the woman's fingers approaching him, as suddenly his vision was blocked. Quickly he felt the first little tug and felt ready to wet himself as he knew what she was doing. "Evelyn please," sighed Mike. "Not too much. I don't want them too thin." "She gone," said the woman, when his vision was unblocked. "No worries. I already make thin. Very pretty. No, you sit still and I make fix on other." "No, not too thin," sighed Mike, feeling her rip. "Go easy!" "Very pretty, yes," said the girl. "Thin nice on you!" "No, I'm saying not too thin," Cried Mike, reaching up his hand to feel them. "Not too thin!" "Yes, very pretty. You no ruin nails," The girl nodded, understanding very little as she pushed his hands back down before jumping back to the other side once more. "You very pretty. No ruin nails." Mike was steaming inside as finally Evelyn came back over. "Oh so much better dear." Evelyn flicked her wrist. "I will not have my future daughter in law looking anything other than fabulous. Now let's go find a dress for the bar mitzvah. Something sensational." Mike was shitting a brick after they raised his chair, and he now saw nothing but two pencil lines where his brows used to be. He tapped on the table, hardly believing these claws were now his, as Evelyn handed him his purse as she led him away as they walked arm and arm down the street. They window shopped like happy girlfriends, enjoying window browsing until finally she saw some things that caught her eye and she led him inside a boutique. "Look at these, Michelle," Evelyn grabbed a series of dresses. "Oh, I wish I was twenty years younger and had the legs for these like you've got. Go try a few on." Mike had little choice as she loaded his arms with a few dresses and he headed into the dressing room. He tried on each one, embarrassed at how short they were or even how they hugged his body. "Oh, that's gorgeous on you," Evelyn remarked when he came out in the fourth dress. "That's it. Give me the tag and let the salesgirl get you the matching shoes. Oh you're so pretty in that." Evelyn, it's a bar mitzvah right?" said Mike nervously as they measured his feet. "Shouldn't I be conservative? I didn't think I'm supposed to look hot for it!" "Non-sense darling! Honey, get her the appropriate undergarments as well. I want her to fill it out perfectly," said Evelyn, snapping at him and snapping her fingers at the sales girl. "I assume this must be your first ever bar mitzvah then. "Well, yes," said Mike sheepishly. "At your age, the girls will be dressed to kill there, and so will you of course, my dear," said Evelyn hugging him before pinching off the tag and looking him dead in the eyes. "I wish we had more time so we could do a little more with that hair and your makeup. But we'll save that for another day." Mike felt so embarrassed as he headed into the back room, changing his bra and panties as he stripped naked in the dressing room. The nude lacey silk bra was firm as he slipped his arms into it. It was more challenging than he thought, as for the first time he struggled to grasp the hooks on his back until he finally he managed to. The little pads and underwire pushed him up so tightly as he stepped into the nude thong panty. He was instantly worried as he tucked himself a few times and then once he pulled up his sheer hose, he realized they were so snug that nothing could really move once he snapped the waist band. The dress was a breeze to put on next to all this, as he guided it over his own head, sliding his arms through the sleeveless bodice. "Honey, you decent?" asked Evelyn. "You need any help?" "Um, I'm dressed," Mike struggled to reach the back zipper. "Just one more minute I think." "Here, slip on your shoes and we're off," said Evelyn, coming in and without missing a beat lifting his hair as he felt the zipper stop at his back of his neck. "I'll pay, and I'll see you out there honey." As Mike turned around, he opened the box, shaking his head at the height of his new shoes. He sat slipping his foot into the first one and slipping the thin strap through the buckle. He was dying as he placed it down and then did the other before standing ever so carefully. "How did I get myself into this?" Mike mumbled to himself, taking a few steps and realizing he was getting better at walking in heels now in his second day. "Fucking basketball." He opened the curtain, staring at his complete image in the three way mirror as he exited the private dressing room on his way back outside. He took a few steps towards it, amazed at how well he passed, putting his hands on his hips as he stopped taking it all in. He lifted one hand and then the other, stroking his long nails through his straight hair as he moved it, neatly positioning some on the front of each shoulder and leaving the rest on his back. He flexed his legs, amazed at how long and toned they looked in the sheer hose and in a dress he would have loved to see Jen in instead of himself. He was in a thin, multi-colored hi-low dress that was definitely geared for a sexy young woman with a great body. On top, the canary colored halter shaped top showed no cleavage with a rounded neckline and was completely sleeveless. It would leave no one to think anything other than he was quite bodacious, as he was certainly displaying a rather chesty appearance under the soft silky top. On the bottom, the coral orange hi-low attached skirt was extremely short in the front showing off his legs, and then quickly tapered to a long flowing ruffle behind his rump, almost like a cape. On his feet were strappy five inch thin canary colored spider web strap stiletto sandals that buckled across his ankles and had a small half inch platform in front. In his ears now hung large gold multi-tiered teardrop earrings, and on his right wrist was a matching thick gold chain link bracelet. "Here, this will match better and just pump up the volume," said the sales girl, approaching him as she unscrewed the top off a brightly colored hot pinkish orange lipstick and handed him a little eye shadow kit. "Oh, thanks," said Mike, having little choice as he pressed it to his lips. He looked up at his image and realized why she handed him the shadows he needed to cover the purples from earlier. It was his first time applying shadows as he flipped over the kit, looking at the application picture. He did his best covering the purple with a peach and it was pretty unsettling adding a light taupe under the thin line where his brow used to be. He took one last glance, rolling his eyes at himself and then rubbed his lips together as headed out of the back room. "Now we're looking more the diva I thought you were, Michelle," Evelyn smiled as she saw him. "I love it!" "Me, a diva?" said Mike, looking at her as they handed him a matching orange purse. "Don't you worry, my dear; I can't have you taking a backseat to Stuart when you get married," said Evelyn, taking Mike by the arm as she led him from the store. "By himself my Stuart's diva enough for both of you, but I'm here to help make you a bit "Jappier" and trust me once you get used to it you'll never want it any other way. It's always tough for goyem girls at first, but no need to kvetsh as I'll take good care helping you." They drove for about ten minutes before they arrived at the party, and Stuart was waiting was they pulled up. He opened Mike's door, taking his hand as he stepped out, smiling instantly as he stepped from the car. "She looks fabulous, doesn't she?" said Evelyn the moment she stepped from the car as the valet opened her door. "Yes, she's looks amazing," said Stuart as he looked Mike up and down. "And don't forget sexy, dear?" said Evelyn. "Now let's get inside, as I can't wait to show her off to the family. There's so much to do." Mike was clenched tightly to Stuart's arm as he was being introduced to person after person. No way could he retain half the names or did he even care, as they sipped some champagne and was slightly relieved eating some finger foods to settle his stomach. After an hour of mingling with Stuart and showing off the ring, Evelyn returned with a few people, pulling Stuart and Mike from a group conversation. "Michelle darling, this is Dr. Schwartz," said Evelyn. "He's the best honey, and I was thinking maybe you could sneak her in next week for a console." "Mother, about what?" asked Stuart, putting his arm around Mike, rubbing his back for comfort. "I'm not sick Evelyn, but it's nice to meet you doctor," said Mike, being polite and extending his hand as he opened his purse, feeling it vibrating and silencing it. "Evelyn, she beautiful," said Dr. Schwartz smiling. "But of course for you Evelyn, I'll squeeze her in anytime you'd like." "Dear, I just want everything perfect for the wedding for both of you," said Evelyn as Mike's purse was buzzing again. "I can't wait to see her in a few dresses at some fittings. With a tweak here and a pinch there, the goyem thing will be gone in no time, and you'll thank me later, honey." "What's that mean, Aunt Evelyn?" said a teen boy coming over. "Oh nothing, hello boys," said Evelyn. "Wonderful party you're having here, Ira." "It is, but I'm tired of dancing with my annoying whiney cousins," said Ira. "Stuart, think we could borrow your girlfriend? Would you like to dance, Michelle? Me and my cousins have been dying to meet you." "Oh, aren't you sweet, but I don't think Stuart would," Mike started to say but quickly he was interrupted. "Oh, I don't mind, and she's been dying to dance," said Stuart, taking Mike's hand and giving it to Ira. "Go ahead Ira, she'd love that." "Thanks, come on Michelle," said Ira excitedly, almost pulling Mike's arm from his sock as he yanked him up. Mike looked back, ready to kill Stuart as quickly he was dancing with the teen boy. After two songs, he found himself dancing with a different cousin and then another as they were enjoying every minute taking turns. He towered a good foot or more over all of them as he had no idea how to act as they put their arms around his back, rested their heads against his chest, and snuggled up on the slow songs. Finally after disco, rock, and some ballads they were being sent back to their tables by the DJ as Mike almost ran back to his seat before anything could change. "You looked like you had fun," said Evelyn. "Thanks honey. You just made their day." "Yeah, I bet you did," whispered Stuart. "Ira's head barely left the spot between your boobs, Irving's hand never left you ass, and I'm pretty sure that short kid I don't even know looked up your dress more than once." "Go fuck yourself," whispered Mike in Stuart's ear before he looked over at Evelyn. "Yes, they were such nice boys. Thanks for that, Stuart." "Don't mention it dear," said Stuart, leaning in and pecking his lips. "Might want to check your phone though, your purse has been buzzing since you've been gone." He looked at it, seeing it was the third missed call from Jen and then saw a text for him to call her asap. "Just excuse me for a moment please," said Mike, taking his phone and dialing her as he walked away from the conversation. "Hey, everything ok?" "Why are you ignoring me?" said Jen annoyed. "I've been dialing you like crazy. What the fuck?" "I'm sorry. What's up?" said Mike. "I tried you earlier, but of course you turned off your phone!" "Why are you whispering?" said Jen. "What's with your voice, and is that loud music I'm hearing? Are you at some party or something?" "It's just a sports thing. No biggie," said Mike. "So listen, I miss you but what's the matter. I can't really talk now." "Whatever! I 'm so sick of this sports shit," said Jen annoyed. "Honey, please it's almost over and we can get back to normal soon?" said Mike. "Can't we?" "I don't know. There's always another sport, another game, another excuse from you," said Jen. "But honey, please," said Mike as she stopped him. "Honey please what? Honey wait for me? Honey where are you going? Honey what happened to your hair?" said Jen sternly. "Look I'm done with all that honey crap, and I called because I've been doing a lot of thinking and I've made a decision." "No, please wait," said Mike, panicking. "Let's just talk in person." "It's not that, you jerk. I don't want to talk about our relationship over the phone, and that'll take more time than a quick cell call," said Jen. "I wanted to just tell you about my back, and you know how much trouble I've had with it." "Oh, yes sorry," said Mike. "Sure, did you hurt it again?" "Well no but I went to a doctor today that Enrique recommended, and he found a solution," said Jen. "Jen, Enrique again," said Mike, getting mad as she again cut him off. "I tried to call you many times to come with me but you were too busy with whatever?" said Jen. "Obviously sports and partying are your priorities these days." "Jennn?" Mike was again cut off. "Listen, I'm cutting this short because obviously you're busy and I can barely hear you with the music blasting," said Jen. "I just wanted you to know that between my doctor, Enrique, and myself I made the decision to have a little procedure this week, so obviously it won't be the best time for us to really talk while I'll be laid up." "Procedure?" cried Mike. "Are you kidding? I'll be there with you of course." "No, don't get mad, I'd rather you didn't. It'll be hard enough for me without you being all emotional, especially how I know how you feel about them?" "Them?" said Mike surprised. "Yes, I'm getting my boobs reduced to alleviate my back pain," said Jen. "I friend of Enrique's had it done, and she swears by it. The doctor said it would be a good idea for me, so I'll be going down to a b-cup with my small frame." "But the Double-Ds," Mike yelled. "I love them. There has to be another way. Maybe better support bras or something." "Look this isn't open for discussion, but I thought I'd let you know in case you cared enough to check in on me and was wondering where I was while I was in the hospital," said Jen. "Look, I gotta go. Good night you jerk." Mike immediately tried re-dialing the second she hung up, but she had turned off her phone as usual. As he turned, he walked back over to the conversation. "Everything ok, Michelle?" Evelyn asked as he returned. "Yes, fine," said Mike with a fake smile, flipping his wrist. "Just a good girlfriend of mine and she's having some issues." "That's nice dear," said Evelyn brushing it off. He now found himself seated at a table with Dr. Schwartz, Evelyn, Stuart and a number of other people. He was up a number a times having to dance and socialize. After an hour or so, he heard the buzzing in his purse and excitedly reached in, grabbing his phone only to be shocked seeing a text message from Jen. "Jealous?" He clicked on it and a picture of her nude boobs filled the screen. "You ok dear. You seem pre-occupied," said Evelyn, tapping his shoulder. "I'd like you to meet Rabbi Levine." "Rabbi Levine?" Mike covered the phone screen nervously. "You know, to conduct your wedding dear," said Evelyn, giving him a dirty look. "You know he'd be the one to conduct the ceremony as he's done with all our family, and also assist with your conversion." "My what?" said Mike, slightly startled. "Just play along. You know how my mother is," whispered Stuart in his ear before giving him a soft kiss and then rubbing his leg. "Your conversion to the Jewish faith for our wedding! Rabbi Levine will help us with that so we can get married in our temple." "Oh, yes of course. How wonderful to meet you Rabbi," Mike noddied at Stuart. "I'm so excited to embrace my new faith, and as important it is to Stuart and Evelyn, well of course it's even more important to me. I can't wait to crush that little glass." "Oh well then I can't wait to welcome you to the tribe," Rabbi Levine raised his glass. "Cheers everyone! Mazltof!" Mike winked at Stuart, seeing how happy Evelyn looked as they all raised their glasses in a small toast. When the glasses went down, Mike tried not to think about it as he stared at his bright lipstick ring on his glass, and knew he had little choice but to show his love for his fianc?e as Stuart felt pressured to lean in, kissing Mike. "Why don't we powder our noses, Michelle?" said Evelyn glowing as she tossed her napkin on the table wiping her mouth and whispering to Mike as she got up. "Take your phone dear." Mike almost shit his panties realizing he had put his phone down on the table when he raised his glass. He grabbed it as it was half covered by Evelyn's napkin, stuffing it in his purse as he quickly followed her to the ladies room. She didn't say a word about it as they stood next to each other touching up their lips and making small talk ,until she turned taking his hands and looking him in the eyes. "I know this can't be easy dear, and it must be happening very fast for you. It's a lot of change for you," said Evelyn. "You ok?" "Oh, sure," said Mike. "I'm good." "And you can tell me if I'm being too pushy, ok," said Evelyn. "Because if you don't, I just can't help myself. I've been waiting so long and I love to help. I can help you get everything you want. Everything a person..I mean everything a girl like you has dreamed of. You're going to make an amazing bride, and I'm going to help you make it perfect. Ok?" "Oh everything's fine Evelyn," said Mike. "All I've really asked of Stuart was that I really wanted to go to the fashion gala tomorrow night. I hear it's amazing." "Oh, consider it done, Michelle. You know, has anyone ever called you Shelley?" asked Evelyn. "I had a friend once and that was her nickname, Michelle shortened. I think it would be cute for you." "You can call me anything you'd like, Evelyn," replied Mike giving her a hug and happy he'd be going to the gala. "And of course your help is wonderful. I'm new at some of this anyway." "I know honey, and I've always known. My Stuart can't fool me." Evelyn smiled as she looked at him and gave a wink. "But I don't care as long as he's happy, and no one else needed to know what's under that dress. All I see is a wonderful girl, and trust me no one else sees anything different." "Wait, you..." Mike squeaked. "Yes dear," Nodded Evelyn before hugging Mike and then releasing him. "Just because you have something extra that my son enjoys doesn't make you any less of a woman. I'm fine with that, and of course we all know how he feels. Now let's get back to the table, and tomorrow I'm buying you the most amazing dress for tomorrow night. I already can't wait my gorgeous Shelley." Mike walked back to the table with Evelyn, feeling an odd sense of relief but was careful not to let his guard down. "Everything ok?" Stuart asked, getting a weird vibe as he leaned in, purposely giving Mike a soft kiss and holding it. "Everything's wonderful, dear," said Evelyn, giving him a playful push off Mike's lips. "Now leave her be until later, we just repaired those lovely lips and she'll kill you if you smear them everywhere." Mike gave Stuart a little smile as again conversations filled the table. At the end of the evening, Mike walked out hand in hand with Stuart until finally they reached his car. "So, that seemed to have gone well!" said Stuart, buckling his seat belt. "Yeah, well I'll be spending more time with your mother tomorrow, so I can go spy on my girlfriend," said Mike giving him a look. "I guess that's the end result, right?" "You tell me," said Stuart. "That's what we're doing all this for, right?" "NO, you tell ME!" said Mike, getting annoyed. "How about we start with some truths asshole. Like she knows I'm a guy, and when were you going to tell me that. And how about she thinks I'm converting faiths for you, and that she'll be deeply involved in every aspect of our wedding." "Ok, ok relax," said Stuart laughing. "She knows I like what's under you skirt, whether she'll say it out loud is another story. But she knows. Immediately she knew it was Sonia's work, so I had no choice but to admit it to her or she wouldn't believe we were serious, and you'd never be getting to the gala." "She's going to be devastated once you tell her we've broken up," said Mike. "But that'll be your problem, as I've got enough of my own. That asshole Enrique has talked Jen into getting breast reduction because she gets a few back pains now and then. Is she fucking kidding me? First the butch haircut, and now this. I've got to figure all this out and what the hell is really happening." "Sure she's still the one for you, then?" asked Stuart