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The Warlock Tyrant by Tegeli CHAPTER I: Surrender I was surprised to see the supposedly divine skyspeaker of the Vatins before me. It had turned out that in their beliefs suicides were barred from ever incarnating to better lives. While I could regard their superstitions with only mild interest, I was glad Madeise hadn't escaped, even into death. The skyspeaker was a young man, barely out of his boyhood. His lean frame was straight in a confident, arrogantly defiant, posture. Fair- coloured hair framed his handsome yet decidedly graceful face. The stare of his red-hued eyes was attempting to kill me with pure hatred, but as far as I knew, the Vatins lacked such sorcery. "Kneel before the despot, captive," my chamberlain Nunim bellowed, with sorcery in her voice to make it even more intimidating. Madeise obeyed, but managed to retain an uppity air doing so. Like he was doing it out of his own will. I thought I would enjoy breaking him. "I formally surrender myself to be a hostage, o great ruler. I plead that you let my companions go," the skyspeaker said. "Let only me suffer from this folly of my own making." "No." I let a grin spread on my face. "The cowardly attack of your band of raiders warrants no additional mercy. They will work to repair the damage they did before ransom is even considered." Madeise gritted his teeth. "Then kill me." "I will not do that. Even if the priests of your people wouldn't merely choose a newborn to replace you." I motioned to my guards. "You will be my guest for the time being." The skyspeaker didn't answer. My lesser office was tiny, and thoroughly more private than the reception hall. Only the stiffly standing Madeise, the always so smugly stern Nunim, and I, the ever magnanimous despot, were present. No guards were needed. Even if Madeise had been armed, he wouldn't have been match for two Peritian sorcerers. I waited for the skyspeaker to try saying something witty or defiant, but he just stared the table between us three. "Oh, he's not going to speak, Brilliance," Nunim said. "Wise. You could twist anything he said into a torture with ironic sting." "True, though I have the tortures already in mind. Chamberlain, see to it that Madeise is set up as a lady in a private room of the women's house, with all that entails." Nunim rolled her eyes, but nasty smile spread to her lips. "Splendid idea. I can see the cute girl in her already." Madeise had lifted his-- no, her gaze. There was still the hate in her eyes, but it was tempered with confusion and fear. "What?" I asked. "Did you think I'd be so banal as to whip you like a common criminal? But I'll make a concession out of my endless reserves of mercy: while I take it that Madeise, as a name, could go both ways among your people, you can refer to yourself as lady Kir if you feel ashamed of your identity." Even though she gritted her teeth, I too could see the cute girl in Kir. CHAPTER II: Tortures The destruction caused by the Vatin attack left me terribly busy with repairs and managing the response, so it was several days before I could call lady Kir to my chambers. She came wrapped in a splendid gown fit for a chaste young woman, red like the blush under her tanned cheeks. Nunim and her folk had done their work well, and hadn't I know, I couldn't have told if the boyish girl in front of me was anything but that. "Be welcome, lady Kir." She flinched like from a blow. I grinned without caring if I looked threatening, half-dressed and lounging on my divan as I was. "Haven't you enjoyed your time in the women's house?" Kir snapped: "What do you want me to say?" She squeezed her fists, her knuckles red and white under the pale skin of her hands. "That I had always wanted to be a girl, and this is not an unending humiliation but a dream come true?" "That would be amusing." I poured myself some wine. "I wanted to ask you some questions." "Anything, Brilliance," she mocked. Her voice had a grating manly quality compared to her appearance. "First, come kneel in front me." She grimaced but obeyed. My pleasingly muscular arm struck out and my fingers coiled around her throat. Kir barely recoiled, something I found quite admirable. An unvoiced spell channelled a bit of my energy into a transformation in her throat. I pushed her backwards. She clambered back to her feet, staring me murderously. "Speak, girl." "Wha--" She gasped, with delightful girly tones. "You..." She gathered her composure with a short breathing exercise. "Well, this was to be expected. Maybe the chamberlain will allow me to speak openly from now on." "I'll instruct her to have you taught singing. If you can't already, that is." "Oh. Thank you, Brilliance. I would love nothing more than to entertain you, our beloved despot, with my new voice." Her flustered attempts at barely veiled derision were pure delight. And even false willingness was a step toward real acceptance. "Have you lain with a man?" She flinched and took a half-step backwards. "No. That sort of... perversity is not something Vatins partake in." "Women do not lay with men among your people? How then are there so many of you to trouble us so?" She glowered at me. "The incarnated skyspeaker is expected to remain chaste unless they marry, which happens rarely. I am not married." "Well, habits are different here in Peritland." "Yes, I have noticed." She grimaced and the heavy antimony around her eyes traced a single dark tear down her cheek. I frowned: tears on pretty faces had always been a weakness of mine. The sight constricted my heart, rising a guilt I had no right to bear. "Why did you attack us?" I said to get the fire back to her gaze. "You burned straight to my city with barely any raiding. You did avoid our patrols, but then your forces were trapped when I arrived with my army. Why such foolishness?" She brushed her cheek with a sleeve. "It was foolishness. An oracle told us that you, the warlock tyrant of the Peritians, would snuff out the manliness --the courage, pride, prowess, the details were unclear as always-- of either of our people or their skyspeaker. Me. Our lords demanded a host to be called to destroy you, and I accepted out of fear for myself. But seems we ourselves did the work of the prophecy." Interesting coincidence, I though, but I never put much worth to fickle things as divination. "You should be careful with your tone going further, lady Kir. Maybe the prophecy told about your gelding." She recoiled and a shiver went through her. "What's the matter?" "I apologize, Brilliance." Her voice was meek now. "It's just that skyspeaker's reincarnation could be jeopardizes by such malicious mutilation. The next skyspeaker could be a woman, though that wouldn't be too bad. What would be quite catas--" I lifted my hand to stop her jabbering. Such foreign superstitions were worthless, save for the leverage it gave to me. "You may leave now, lady Kir. Do keep our conversation in mind." CHAPTER III: Weakness I always tried to take the opportunity to walk about my demesne, or at least my city, to maintain a connection to the small matters. It was also useful to reinforce the idea among my subjects that, yes, I was nigh unkillable sorcerer. One who didn't need a bodyguard beyond an armour-dressed porter or two. Well, those men were some of the best soldiers under my service, but they were more for decoration than utility. Most of the time. But that chilly day my bodyguard was with me, to protect lady Kir, as we walked on the outer wall of Asikhatum, my splendrous capital city. "See, how sturdy these walls are, lady Kir?" I asked. Of course she knew now, but I suspected she had underestimated their strength by quite a large margin. "Yes, Brilliance. There's nothing like this in our land." She swallowed. "The Vatins were unprepared." We arrived at the ruinous mess, where crude sorcery had blasted a small gap in the wall. A group of captured Vatins were moving the rubble while more skilled workers reworked and piled stone. Kir froze. Some of the Vatins lifted their gaze, but the weary dullness in their eyes didn't change. Madeise must have been glad that she was unrecognizable under her wide-brimmed hat and a gauze veil. She was close to the edge, so I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her back. She let out a quite scandalous yelp, but didn't move away from my side. "Worry not, lady Kir. The Vatins are treated well, as long as they do not dawdle undoing the damage they worked to cause." "That is... Magnanimous of you, Brilliance." She gave me a lovely half- smile, and I almost believed she meant it. I made a habit of taking Kir for walks from then on. I definitely wanted to boast as I showed her my city: its mighty edifices, the high towers, the clever infrastructure that kept it clean and healthy. She was aloof though not uncordial. Clearly she was glad to leave her cloistering in the women's house, but she remained distant. I desired to see her smile again, but giving gifts --bribes for friendship-- would have been a vapid gesture. At least without a good excuse. Eventually it was the day of a peasant flower festival, during which it was traditional to hand over a flower to the members of the opposite sex. There were no rules to: it was up to the recipient to interpret the gesture how they willed. The tradition had spread to the city, and I had made a custom of handing a flower --rather randomly selected-- to every woman in the palace, from servants to court ladies. I couldn't afford to be seen as a miser. But Madeise intruded my thoughts foremost: I didn't want Nunim or any other woman giving Kir a flower, even in jest. So I called Kir the first thing in the morning and handed her a large stalk with curling leaves and majestic blossoms. She just stared at it. At that moment I realised the feelings I had for her: I feared she would think I was mocking her situation, instead of praising her in my clumsy fashion. At length, Kir lifted her eyes and smiled wide. "Thank you, Brilliance. It is very beautiful." 'Like you' I thought to say but instead I mumbled: "You are welcome." We walked a small round around courtyards in silence. Kir --and that smile-- invaded my thoughts with disturbing regularity, and for good month of sinking into work I managed to avoid her. But when chamberlain Nunim mentioned I wouldn't have any duties before the noon of the next day, I gave in and called Madeise to my quarters for the second time. Her outfit was quite a bit more daring. The splendid fabric was thin and the low neckline emphasized the existence of her new tiny breasts. Nunim had worked enhancements, which would make Kir go through the poorly understood process little girls did as they became women. She was indeed becoming like a woman: in addition to her teats, luscious easy life in the palace had built soft flesh on her lean frame, pleasingly concentrated on her butt and thighs. "Good evening, lady Kir. How have you enjoyed your time as my guest?" She stayed silent. "You can speak frankly. I'm genuinely curious." "It's humiliating, Brilliance, but I can tolerate it. I'm not mistreated beyond the indignity. But I do enjo--" She lowered her gaze and the blush on her now nearly untanned skin brightened. I waited for her to continue, enjoying the sight of her self- consciousness. She didn't lift her eyes. "When it's not aggravating, I do enjoy the pampering, like any human craving creature comforts. And I realize there's some mercy in your treatment of me, as constant embarrassment is a torture that quickly loses its most painful edge." Was she being impertinent? Her tone was sincere. She continued: "I am also grateful that you have allowed my identity to remain a secret. And that you have had chamberlain Nunim spread the rumour that I am merely my own cousin, while the skyspeaker is actually locked in one of the prison towers." It had been no kindness: I was merely concerned about the scandal the revelation would cause among the Vatins. I had to be sure it would be beneficial before letting the truth out. This capitulation was surprising, not to mention suspicious. I frowned while I examined her carefully. The delicate features of her pretty face, the enticing body only emphasized by her clothing. Heat stirred in me, but that lust had been anticipated: I wouldn't have gone through with the whole thing if the thought didn't titillate me. Yet it had been quite a new desire for me; nothing such had emerged in my mind before the sight of Madeise. I stood up and stepped to Kir. My chosen form was tall, and she was barely above average for a woman, so I towered over her. Yet, she met my gaze with unwavering confidence. While I couldn't see the old hatred in her eyes, she was clearly determined to remain defiant. I placed my hand on her cheek. The skin was silk. Gone was the roughness of arid winds and sunburn. I moved my thumb to her pouty lips, and she didn't resist as I pushed the digit into her mouth. With a bit of coaxing I got my thumb between her teeth. She didn't bite. Perhaps she knew her jaws would never pierce my skin, or maybe she waited for something more vulnerable to sink her teeth into. My desire continued to build, and along with it resentment. She had managed to wrap me around her finger without having done anything, save for being pretty, coy and beyond my reach. Sure, I could have taken her by force, but so could I any other woman, except possibly for Nunim (though neither of us would have enjoyed the attempt). What I couldn't take, but suddenly wanted to have, was Kir's freely given love. I hated myself for such weakness. She hadn't done anything to deserve my affection. She was an enemy, rightfully captive. She was due only a swift execution, from which her people's weird religion had saved her. I sank back to my divan and said: "So, how grateful are you exactly?" The words came out much colder than I intended. She was getting under my skin, and now she knew it. My heart skipped a beat when I interpret the smile that spread on her face as a suggestive one. Damned minx had learned fast the wiles of the women's house. "You look stressed, Brilliance. Maybe I could help relieve some of the tension?" I stifled a groan. I didn't know what to think. Everything I could do would serve to embarrass me further in front of my captive, this whelp of a steppe-bandit. I gathered what remained of my composure and put on a steely face. Maybe her confidence would falter when pushed. "Take of your clothes, lady Kir." She only hesitated long enough affect bashfulness, before a pull of a cord slipped the dress off her. I tried to tell myself that her body was nothing special compared to plenty of other ones I had been showcased, but it was in vain. I already put importance to the person attached to those slim curves. Nunim was an artist, and perhaps Madeise had been a good canvas. Kir's waist was thin, but her belly had pleasant tempting softness. Her hips weren't overly wide, but enough so to advertise fertility, in a deliciously incongruous fashion on her. The hips continued into meaty thighs and otherwise slender legs. Furthermore she was clearly aroused: the diminutive penis was hard enough to to rise slightly, fighting against the feminine influence of what Nunim had conjured. And that falsely demure cat's smile plastered on Kir's face! She knew what I felt. She was crafty and brazen. I should have sent her to entertain the menservants so she'd learn the price of presenting wantonness. But I wanted her for myself. "Kneel here," I growled and motioned between my knees. If nothing else, she'd do at least one thing she wouldn't be able to own as the skyspeaker, and I'd get over the lust clouding my thoughts. "Yes, Brilliance." She obeyed, and I took out my member. It was proportional to my frame, so only moderately large. I had no need to bolster my masculinity by summoning a constrictor snake into my trousers. To my chagrin, there was no discomfort in Kir's expression. In fact, I was taken aback by the lust that was clearly still there. "What's wrong with you?" I almost shouted. "What do you mean, Brilliance?" She dared to grin at me. "Oh, you mean my willingness? Your chamberlain did magic on me, and now I'm constantly bothered. And I can now see how handsome you are, I guess because I'm being turned into a girl." So she was just a sorcerously brainwashed floozy. Taking her wouldn't be any better than base rape with the force of stronger arms. I was deflated. "Is something wrong, Brilliance?" "Yes." I swallowed the embarrassment of failing to perform in front of a willing slut. "Go back to your room." The dawn found me in a black mood. I called Nunim to my quarters, fully knowing it would disturb her duties. "What do you want, Brilliance?" she asked, without trying to hide the annoyance in her voice. "I want you to stop any brainwashing on Madeise." "No such thing is done." "But yesterday she acted like a cockhungry whore!" Amusement lifted the corner's of Nunim's mouth. "She's going through what all girls go through. Perfectly normal process, if a bit accelerated. Brilliance, I'm starting to think you might not be aware that women also have desires, though gods know I do not try to hide mine. Unthinking arousal is not just for men." "Don't get overly impertinent with me now, my friend." "Look, my despot. My friend, I'm quite surprised to see you affected this way. But I think I get what's going on. You fell for the bitch." "I'm that blatant?" I sighed and got out of my nightwear. "But yes. Better not start lying to you. And not about trivial things like this." Nunim's smile gained some warmth. "I take this as a compliment. I worked hard to make her body both plausible and enticing. Nevertheless, it's not my place to offer you advice on your trysts. But perhaps try wooing her in a more traditional way? She probably won't try sucking you off in public, and you might be able to gauge if she has any emotion for you save lust." CHAPTER IV: Confessions Despite my non-apparent age, I had no notable experience on courting anyone. I had barely even thought about it. Never had I the chance before having not the time. When we walked in my garden, which was public enough that we might be seen but private enough so we would not be heard, I was nervous. Like all those years back when I brought flowers to Nunim only to receive mocking laughter. My anxiety wasn't helped by Kir's behaviour. She walked with a stiff back, hands tightly hidden in her sleeves, face as an expressionless mask. I was such a fool to expect anything else. "Brilliance, I apologize my behaviour yestereve. I do not understand what came over me." She gave me a look I couldn't read. "Although, I wonder... Never mind, Brilliance." I had to be direct. Or more direct than merely walking in silence at least. I didn't know any other way. I guided us to a pavilion and reinforced its obscurity enchantments so we couldn't be eavesdropped. We sat on a bench, and she gave me a look accompanied by a faint smile. "Is there something you wanted to discuss, Brilliance?" I wanted to ask why she tormented me so, but I wouldn't have been able to bear the shame of that. "What do you want?" I asked. She was barely taken aback. "In what way?" "In general. You must hope for something." I couldn't help it: my tongue continued on its own. "Why do you tolerate these impositions on you so gracefully?" "Is my behaviour not to your liking?" "It is..." Delightful. Lovely. Infuriating. "Entertaining." "That is good. I have come to understand that my situation is very much a deserved humbling, decreed by gods. The only way a failure of a skyspeaker like me can carry out my duties to my people is by trying to garner your good will. The Vatins would benefit from your friendship, and suffer horribly from your enduring wrath. Your people are prosperous in a way mine are not even near." Obviously horse-wanderers couldn't build cities like Asikhatum. The splendour of the palace didn't mean my people were free of poverty, though. "And even your lowly servants have nothing but praise to say about your justice." Nunim worked hard to ensure the palace remained loyal in words, deeds and thoughts. Kir lifted her gaze to the intricately carved ceiling. "And your terrifying might is unsurpassed." A scowl threatened to spread on my face. She had been flattering me, but now she was merely debasing herself with verbal grovelling. She continued: "Even your only rival the chamberlain speaks about the despot Asikhat like she would be in love with him, if she wasn't into women." My sharp breath was as revealing as a gasp. I had no reason to doubt Nunim's loyalty, but claiming she might have been in love with me was overmuch. Our friendship was purely pragmatic. I would have had to end her if she had been a threat instead of an asset. I leaned back. Madeise's behaviour had indeed been a ruse, though she was almost honest about it. The revelation was stone off my chest, yet some of the weight I immediately missed. At least I could stop making a fool of myself. "Some praise and a fellatio won't make me ignore the constant raids, Madeise." Her gaze went down and then returned to stare me with the familiar fire of confidence. "I did not think so. But not all of the 'raids' are out of our greed. Peritians spread their flocks and sometimes even farms on our lands, and do their fair share of reaving." That wasn't entirely untrue. My head hurt from remembered stress. The Vatin frontier was such a thorn in my side. I didn't want to deter peasants from claiming new land if they thought they could cultivate it, regardless of where the land was, but I couldn't just leave them to fend for themselves either. Dead subjects made me seem weak, and Vatin pastures were too marginal for me to believe my peasants much coveted them, even if my border lords were always greedy for more land. It might have been possible to march an army into the land of Vatins, and lay waste to their flocks and scatter their folk, but the sort of logistics required could easily go horribly wrong, even if I led the expedition in person. And I had more important things to do than murdering annoyances. The silence was so deep, while I pondered, that I was startled by Kir's speech. "Brilliance. I didn't mean that my conduct has been purely out of duty. And the excuse that I was under your chamberlain's spell was mostly just that, and excuse I made for myself." Kir was holding her hands on her lap and looking down. "This... imposition, this mask of lady Kir, has unlatched... tendencies in me I must already have had. Obviously some of it is roused by the spells, but I do not dislike it." I did my best to harden my heart, but instantly failed. Empty adulation was common in the palace, but I was amazed how she could talk about her inner life so openly and --out of all people-- to me. Maybe she had been humiliated until more of it did not register. Perhaps I too needed a bit of humbling. I took her hand in mine, enjoyed the width of her eyes, steeled myself with a deep breath and then said: "We should discuss the situation of the frontier." Before she could answer, I pressed my lips on hers. It took a moment for her to pull back. She gave me a cat's smile. "Yes, we should discuss." CHAPTER V: Discussion Our discussion was to take place in my chambers after last light. Kir came dressed in an enticing gown a bit more formal than the last one. With that faint smile the sight of her made my chest ache. But the mulling over wine and my thoughts during my solitary evening meal had raised suspicion back into my mind. "Have you heard what is going on at the Vatin frontier?" I asked. She sat down on the other side of the table. "Yes. I can't say I condone it, but I understand. The punitive raids are necessary, and I am ashamed of my foolishness that warranted them." The declaration of the raids had been more of a gesture than real policy. The border lords would have committed them anyhow, now that the Vatins were weakened by the loss of an army and lack of the ritual unity under their skyspeaker. But I had commanded all the captives to be brought to my estates as hostages, instead of being uselessly ransomed back or sent to the corners of earth as chattel; a demand surely earning ire on both sides of the frontier. "Tiresome." "What is, Brilliance?" I had thought aloud, so I had to own it. "This constant necessity to signal my power, to both my subjects and my enemies, and everyone else. Doing so requires constant impositions everyone --myself included- wished didn't exist." "I think I understand." She frowned. "But then, why did you take the despot's place, Brilliance? You weren't born to it." The unsaid 'unlike me' hanged in the air, surprisingly bitter. I had an ever-shifting list of excuses and rationales for answering that question. I chose the simplest and possibly truest one: "I wanted the power, and I want to keep it, even if it comes with unpleasant aspects." "There's more to it, I think. You are the best one for the responsibility. Lesser hands on the reins would work harm." That was the lie those with power over others and the ability for self- denial wanted to believe. The only thing I could know I did best was Peritian sorcery, which was tangentially related to rulership. But the compliment did lift the corners of my mouth. My wrath from the attack had been abated, and the desire to hurt Madeise was long gone. With the right question, I might be able to see into her true intentions. It would be a relief. "What would you do if I set you free? After we transformed you back of course." Her aghast expression showed much more shock than the mere chance of leniency should have. It took several breaths for her to collect herself. "I'm sorry, Brilliance. I hadn't given that any thought." Her hand shivered and she hid it under the table. "I would work to convince our lords that peace is our best option. But... But after my failure such talk would brand me a coward and all would consider the prophecy fulfilled." The dark makeup betrayed a stray tear. I should have had antimony outlawed, or at least come up with an excuse to make it unfashionable in the court. "Yet." Her voice was thin. "If you allowed it, Brilliance, I would prefer to stay here." I was being callous, but I had to ask it: "Why?" And she explained, along with sobs that were more of a danger to me than daggers. She feared the embarrassment. She didn't want to become the battle flag of a futile war for revenge. She wanted me to help her people, even if she didn't know how. And --in a thin whisper-- she liked being a lady, but she wanted me to know it was perfectly decorous and not due to 'the Peritian perversion' forced upon her, because some of the earlier skyspeakers had been women (she believed she was all of those too). And yet she was glad of the Peritian sorcery that had made it possible for her specifically. Lastly: "And I guess I love you." An emergency trance, intended for surprises during negotiations, took over me, to wipe all sign of emotions from my face. "I know it's embarrassing for us both," she continued, smile returning to her face. "But to me especially, for me to fall for my captor, no matter how kind or handsome." I needed to get out, but I couldn't just run out of my quarters in my own palace. "You are free," I stammered. "I swear it by the high gods under whose grace I am allowed to rule. An escort will take you to the land of Vatins." I pleaded in my mind that Madeise would finally reveal the ruse. Take the clemency and leave. I could handle the political repercussions better than whatever seemed to be going on. "But... That's not what I want." She lifted her gaze, which had regained its confidence. "And it would not be wise to give up your most valuable hostage. The power of Vatins has only been blunted, not broken." Her voice lowered. "And if our might was wielded more sensibly than before, it wouldn't be such an easy deed to brush us aside." I gritted my teeth out of confused frustration. Just a moment ago she had been sobbing and confessing love, and now she cast out barely veiled threats. Only the fact that my quarters were private, and that she would be unlikely divulge anything, stopped me from lashing out in order to avoid losing face. "What exactly do you want me to do?" I demanded, with barely enough presence of mind not to insult her. "Just let me be with you." She grasped the edge of the table with both hands. "For a while at least. It wouldn't hurt anyone." Again she used her best weapon against me. I couldn't say no to her, not with those tears running down her cheeks. "Come here." I motioned her to sit next to me on the divan. Knowing not what else to do, I wrapped my arm around her. Pressed against me, she was so small. Her arm and frame felt so thin and frail I feared I would hurt her with a chance movement. We stayed that way for a long while. "If you stay..." I said. "Sooner than later the truth will be out. There will be rumours..." Not that I'd have minded them --talk of such 'perversities' didn't diminish the prestige of sorcerers, or Peritian despots for that matter-- not before realizing how they might have hurt Kir. "I know," she whispered. A bang of guilt created a flash of understanding in my mind. She was afraid, of the uncertainty of her situation, of the displeasure of her own people, of her own feelings, of me and what I could do, or leave undone. "What would make you feel safe?" She stayed silent for a moment, but breathed more calmly. "Thank you, Brilliance, for asking that. If you would but keep me close. I know you won't hurt me, and if you did, I wouldn't care to live." My breath got stuck in my throat. "Are you unhappy in your room?" "No. The quarters are pleasant --I love the water gardens-- and the residents are friendly. The chamberlain is a stern mistress, but not without her own kindness. Still..." She fell silent, I felt, in order not to cry again. "If you want, you can come live in these quarters. Nothing would be amiss if I seemed to keep a wellborn bedwarmer. But I can't offer you any official position. That said, I suspect it would be lonely here, so you may keep the room in the women's house too." "Wouldn't that mean freedom to the palace, to move as I please, at least between here and there?" "Yes, but you are my guest. I swore a rather terrifying oath to that." She pressed against me, her face hidden. "Why are you so kind to me?" That was a good question, without any rational answers. "I fell in love with you." "Thank you." Her voice was quiet, tired with the sudden release from anticipation. I too was weary. I lifted her up, kissed her forehead and took her to the bedroom. "We could... If you wanted." It wasn't right to take advantage of her vulnerability. And the awkwardness of the evening had stolen all mood for pleasure. Maybe I also had drank too much wine during the meal. I placed her on the bed and pulled the blanket on her. "Let's just rest," I said as I lied down. "Alright," she said and pressed next to me. Now I could escape. I brushed her hair and spoke the words of sleep, and then did the spell on myself. I woke on a bed empty. I couldn't believe the yestereve had been a dream, so I looked around. "Kir?" "Here, Brilliance." She walked out of the small bathing room, with the blanket wrapped around her. Somehow she was almost as radiant as ever with her hair messy and without the make-up. "Hi..." She looked demurely down. "Good morning, my despot." "Good morning." "I was just cleaning myself a bit. It's weird that the despot of all Peritland has no body servants waiting on him." "I prefer the privacy more than the convenience of someone fussing over my wardrobe and person before I get out of the bed. They can do it when I get out of my rooms." I dreaded the stories of how stifling mere dressing up could be for the nobles, who couldn't signal status by just by being sorcerers. She pouted. "But do you prefer me over that privacy?" "How can I know yet?" I stood up and strode to her. "I only know that you are beautiful." "Than--" My kiss silenced her. She pressed against me for a while before detaching. She said: "I realized that some arrangements are needed, if I'm to live here." I smiled. "Already making demands?" "No, but I will need a place for clothes and dressing up. Though I need to practice painting my face myself." I rubbed my temple. "I didn't think of that. I can't allow you to run around unkempt. Not that you aren't fetching the way you are now, but they would think I'm deliberately humiliating you. You will have to move to the attached quarters." "Those for the despot's wife?" "Yes. Would you mind?" "No, but the court will talk." "I don't care." I walked to the bathing room, chilled a jug of water with the memory of ice, and poured the now cold liquid on myself. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feeling of being uncomfortably alive. I felt a towel on my back and turned to look at Kir's smiling face. I let her continue drying me and said: "The quarters have a bath fed by a tiny waterfall, and contraptions for helping with your hair, face paint and dress--" "Those wonders! The women's house had a few of them!" "--so you do not have to take any servants with you. Unless you want to." She didn't. I left her to arrange her new quarters, and went on to my duties. The responsibilities weighed lighter, and I almost felt embarrassed how easily my mood had been so considerably improved. CHAPTER VI: Bedwarming Several matters in the city had required the despot's direct attention, and when I returned to my lesser office, I was drenched in sweat from the day's heat. Numin was there arranging my papers. "Afternoon," I said and took off my riding coat. "Afternoon, Brilliance." She grinned at me. "So, your new mistress is moving to the marital quarters. Your countenance sure has brightened. It's almost... Brilliant." "You know I can shine like a lamp, or the sun, if I cared to." "That would surely spook the courtiers. Anyhow, on to the business I'm here for. The Vatins are sending an envoy." "I know." "And they will want, among other things, to negotiate the release of their skyspeaker." "Yes, I know." I managed to keep the annoyance from my voice. "And keeping that skyspeaker as your personal doll is not conducive of that." "Get to the point, Numin." "Sorry, Brilliance, being obstinate is my job. Nobody else would dare to do it." "I'd kill you too, if I wanted." She smiled. "Yes, but that would be risky work, and not like a petulant boy stamping an ant." I sighed. "Sorry, Numin. I do understand your point. Gods, I wish we could just erect a big impenetrable barrier between us and the Vatins." "That would kill the lucrative trade with them and the lands beyond. And be expensive to maintain. Unless you planned on doing it yourself?" "I'd order you to do it." She nodded deep. "I'm honoured of your assessment of my aptitude. But Asikhat my dear, you can't keep the lid on this for long. In fact, the secret is already becoming a rumour. I did my best, but not much thought is needed to figure out something is going on when a girl doesn't bathe or dress up with the others." "How much does the palace know?" "That you took a captured boy, a fetchingly girly one, for a lover." "I don't care about that." "Nor do you have any reason to. I take boyish girls to my bed all the time, and the most backtalk I hear from courtiers is 'please don't kill me.'" She let out her lovely laugh that chilled you deep into the bones. "It's actually widely assumed you already killed Madeise, and are just keeping the subject wrapped up to confuse the Vatin priests. I think most believe the savage Vatins were lead by beefy warrior instead of a fresh youth. But when the Vatin emissary gets here, things will change." I rubbed the ridge of my nose. "Do you have any suggestions?" "Not really. Foreign policy is not my responsibility. But I think you should ask the hussy in question for help. She knows her people." And so I did when I went to have the evening meal back in my quarters. "Brilliance," Kir said. "I don't know. I do want to help, but I can't know what the lords and priest are thinking. Oh, how can I be so useless..." "Perhaps you could come with me to the talks, as lady Kir, my mistress from who I can't keep my hands off even during negotiations. You could advice me directly based on what they have to say." Her mouth quivered. "Would that be appropriate? Wouldn't they know?" "I doubt it. And I'll have the meeting as private as possible." "I could do that. I'm glad if I can be useful. To you and my people." "I'll have the chamberlain give you our reports on the Vatins. So you can understand both sides." "You would let me read your military intelligence?" "Yes, I trust you. If you were spying on me, you are doing it rather ineffectively." She grinned. "Maybe I'm not so bad a spy as you think. Mistress Nunim already gave me such reports, saying that 'as I wasn't going to disappear from vexing the despot' I might as well do something useful, and had be correct errors I thought were harmful to both Peritland and Vatins." I frowned. I didn't like Kir spending any time at all with the chamberlain. While I trusted Nunim, almost with my life even, her eccentricities were as nasty as mine. "Something wrong, Brilliance?" She cocked her head. "Can I call you Asikhat? In private, I mean?" "Nothing's wrong, and yes. Do you want me to call you Madeise or Kir?" "Both are fine, though lady Kir is probably better for public. Madeise is usually a man's name among Vatins, but not unheard of on a woman. But if you called me 'dear' or 'love', or something... It would make me happy." After the dinner, I had to go through a few last errants before returning for the night. When I stepped into the room barely lit by the crystal lamp, Kir clambered up to sit on the divan. "Seems I fell asleep waiting for you," Kir said. I yawned. "I too am ready for sleep." I took of my private robe and walked to the bedroom. "Are you going to sleep in your own rooms?" She walked to me. "No. I thought we could have some... Fun before." I was tired, but the sight of her biting her lip and barely dressed stirred life into me. I kissed her and guided her to the bedroom. Lying on the bed, I let her take her time undressing. She climbed to the bed and hesitated. "Erm... I do not know what to do!" The words poured out like a herd of startled cattle. "The chamberlain did enchant my stomach so I would always be clean... Down there, and I made sure by cleaning myself thoroughly. But... But I'm so tight, and it would be unnatural. I think it would hurt." She took a long look at my now rigid member. "It wouldn't fit." I grasped her wrist and pulled her next to me. "We do not have to do anything like that." I didn't dare to admit that I was somewhat intimidated by the prospect myself, never having done such a thing as lying with a man or a 'girly boy'. It was hard for me to consider Kir as anything but a woman, and now her hesitation infected me. She pressed herself against by side. "I'm sorry. I thought I wanted it, but now I'm scared. I'm such a coward. I wish I was a proper girl." I could see the glitter of her eyes in the dark. She continued: "Would you still like me?" "Yes." I paused. "I'm not particularly attracted to... I'm attracted to you in particular, my love." "Thank you." She moved her hand over to my groin. "Can I?" "Go ahead." The handjob was clumsy from the position we were in, but I wanted to have her in my embrace. "Would Peritian sorcery be able to make me a woman, all the way?" "It would be risky." My breath came out ragged. "Nunim didn't change your body much more than what it could naturally have done itself in the correct circumstances." "Oh. I'd still want to try." I kissed her cheek. "You might die." "Well, I'd still like to. But later." She got up to her knees and bowed her head to my groin. "Do you mind if I...?" "No. But I'm close." She took the swollen head gingerly into her mouth. As she moved her head up and down, her teeth scraped the skin --and would have hurt a normal man--, but it didn't take long for me to climax. Kir took all my seed into her mouth, leaned back next to me and swallowed. "You have done something to your... fluid, Asikhat. It tastes good." "You are just a born cocksucker." "No. Don't tease me like that." She sounded genuinely hurt. "Forgive me, love." "I do." She wrapped her fingers around my hand. "But yes, the flavour change was something I did as a lad, thinking it would make girls want me." "How did it work?" "It required a girl to taste it in the first place, so not too well." She giggled. "I'll go freshen up so I can kiss you." "Do you need me to...?" "Help me come?" "Y-yes," I stammered. "Asikhat... I think that would make us both feel uncomfortable." She rose from the bed. "You are right." I put my head on the pillow, weary, but angry at myself. "I'll be right back." I was asleep before she returned. CHAPTER VII: The Emissary I did my best to imprint the days of waiting into my memory. Kir beamed when ever she could be of help, so I took her with me on the routine chores of the palace. It turned out to be a smart decision. Kir was good at taking notes, and she charmed courtiers and supplicants alike with her bashful courteousness. And I would have been much too eager to shirk my duties if she hadn't been with me. I felt bad that I didn't do much for her in the bed, but she insisted on using her mouth, and neither of us wanted to push the other into something they didn't feel ready for. The Vatins arrived in a small company, dusty from the road with several exhausted horses for each man. The emissary, a lean man dressed richly under the dust, bowed to me. "Greetings, Brilliance. I must apologize for the state in which I present myself to you. And I also must say that we couldn't bring a gift worthy of your splendour. The lords' council couldn't agree on anything, I'm afraid. So I, on my own behalf, give you these horses save the ones we ride back home." "I accept your gift." The horses of Vatin nobility were nimble, graceful and well-mannered animals. A herd of them had been captured after the attack on Asikhatum, but that would have been impolite to mention. Later that day, after the emissary had rested and cleaned himself, we met in the tiny reception hall. It was a small room with a table and chairs and a very low dais with a modestly throne-like divan. I sat on it, with Kir lying partly on my lap, more out of my preference instead of laziness to send for a suitable chair. With us were only the emissary and his assistant. Apparently the chamberlain had convinced them that taking guards into a room with me was less than futile. "Who's this woman?" the emissary asked. The politeness of his voice was tinged with severity. Kir lifted herself and turned her face away so they couldn't see her smile. "She's my focus. Her presence helps me concentrate." The Vitan assistant crumbled, but the emissary merely nodded a bow. They didn't take seats, which was as well, as the initial talks weren't expected to last long. The details would later be hammered out by the two hordes of assistants. The emissary bowed again. "The lords and priests of Vatins send their gree--" I lifted my hand. "We both know how the platitudes go. I respect your time just as much as you respect mine. Let's get to the business." "As you will, Brilliance." "What do they want?" "The release of all the hostages and still available slaves. End of the raids. And truce for seventeen years." Kir looked at me, but she didn't have to say anything for me to understand what she meant. "Until the new skyspeaker is of age, yes? I assume then that he has been found already." "No, Brilliance. We do not assume, without evidence, that you have murdered our skyspeaker. But if he was dead, for any reason, we would indeed prefer a sturdy peace until the new one is ready to guide us." "What would the Vatins give in bargain?" "We do not bargain!" the assistant yelped and got a heavy-ringed backhand slap from the emissary. "Keep your tongue, colt, lest you become a gelding!" The emissary turned to me and bowed deep. "I apologize." "It is forgiven." "Brilliance, the lords couldn't agree on any concessions. While I could try to assess what would be accepted if presented back to the council, it would make this much easier if the skyspeaker was here with us. The council would follow the terms he accepted." Kir leaned to my ear and whispered: "They want to know if I'm alive. The council is not bound by the skyspeaker's decisions, if the skyspeaker was not first advised by them on the issue." I spoke to the emissary: "Why would you come all the way here to state that you have nothing to say to me? I could negotiate with the skyspeaker without you, if that was any good without your council's approval." "So he is still lives?" "Yes." The Vatins both did a reverential hand sign. The emissary said: "Thanked be the gods, and your mercy, Brilliance." "So, what are your lords willing to give for more of my mercy?" "Brilliance, the skyspeaker must really be brought here. I lack the proper authority!" I tried to gauge Kir's expression from the corner of my eye. She didn't seem eager to reveal herself. I said: "What use is a youth who has been months separated from the events and has not heard the council?" The emissary bowed with trained impertinence. "Very well. I speak frankly. The lords prepare for war. Slay me if you will, my words are truth. Without a truce they will pour from our plains and hills to burn and kill until your frontier is so desolated it will take generations before your people can again encroach on our lands." Kir jumped up. "No! That would be purest folly!" "Who is this woman?" the assistant demanded. "I am Madeise, the speaker for our gods!" Kir moved her hand and said a stave in her language: a magic of her people or some sort of evocation of her gods. And the Vatins believed. "Foul sorcery!" the emissary cried. "The skyspeaker is defiled!" A blade was in his hand and he leaped like a wolf. Kir moved between me and the emissary but I stood up and brushed her aside. The blade sunk a knuckles worth into my chest. I flicked the emissary back and froze in place. The pain, bloodletting and the blade's potent poison threatened to rise the battle fury in me. I had to concentrate to keep myself in control. Fortunately the Vatins merely gaped at me. After I had calmed down and the poison had been burned from my veins, I helped Kir up. "Are you hurt, love?" "No, Brilliance." She clasped my arm. "Please. Please, forgive them. They don't know." She let go of me and turned to the emissary. "You are an envoy so you must be a soulseer?" "Yes," he said, wary. "Then see to my soul and mind, so you can witness nothing foul has happened. My mind is not addled with a warlock's spells!" I moved my arm between them and asked Kir: "Are you sure?" "Yes," she said. I stepped back. Kir lowered her head for the touch of the emissary's hands. For a while they stood there unmoving. The emissary let his hands drop. "I... I have to believe this. I apologize, my... my lady." He turned towards me and bowed. "I apologize to you too, Brilliance. I would offer my head for my mistake, but my testimony in it is needed by my lady." He lifted his hands towards me. "Instead I offer the arm that dared to hurt you. Take both of them. I can ride with my knees." I gathered the best of my stately composure. "I will pardon you, for you acted brashly only in service of what I too love. You will go intact and spread the word of my indulgent mercy." "Maybe we should postpone further discussion," Kir said. "Until we all have had time to adjust to the changed circumstances." I was glad to accept. Fighting the poison and the fury had left me tired, and even when we got back to our quarters, my heart still raced like I had run around the city with wolves at my heels. The truth was out by the evening meal. The emissary or his assistant must have spoken to the other Vatins, and the ears of the palace had picked the rumour that reinforced other rumours until a truth-like consensus was reached. "Well, I'm glad I do not have to deny it," Madeise said. "I'll do my best to stop the rumours from running too wild," Nunim said. "You do that," I said. "Better that the fears of the Vatins aren't projected back to them." Nunim bowed herself out. "What sort of deal will your people accept?" I asked Kir. "They will accept a truce, as long as they feel the threat of their force wasn't pointless. So ransom the captives at a reasonably low price in gold and horses. You value gold more than we. Then give the ransom to your border lords in exchange of reliefs to the taxes of their subjects for the year. The lords will feel reassured on top of their new Vatin steeds, while the folk who have suffered from the raids and war-taxes will bless your name and perhaps be less desperate to squabble over land and flocks." The suggestion was close to what I had in my mind, but I was glad to have heard it from her. "However..." She bit her lip. "That alone won't be enough. While a soulseer will be believed, at least by other soulseers, the priest can't accept I'm with you out of my own will, unless I'm married to you and our love is proved in front of our gods." She looked down. "I will have to return." I gazed at the ceiling. I wanted to marry her. But the matter of succession wasn't entirely settled: Nunim might have been able to handle it, but she was just as likely to die before me. And I had only been supreme over the other sorcerers with her support. Yet, I hoped, my death would be far off in the future. "I will marry you. But I suspect the catch is in the gods' approval." "Yes. The ritual would have to be done in Rtein, a sacred hill at the root of our holy mountains, quite deep into our lands." That would be a problem. My frown must have been intense, as Kir's expression turned worried. She came to me and sat on my lap. "It would be dangerous, I know. That was why I can't ask you to do it." "I'll figure it out." She kissed me and crooned: "I want to try it. I mean, you inside me." It took a moment to understand what she meant. Flustered, I said: "That might hurt you." She twined her fingers around mine. "But you wouldn't try to hurt me. Please. You were so strong today, but I'm afraid something will happen to either of us. I saw... How you could still be hurt." It was true that the poison had caught me unaware, but it wouldn't have been much trouble if I hadn't tried to control the fury at the same time. Still, the dramatic revelation of the truth had left a shadow of doom over me, and I shared Kir's sentiment. I took her to the bed, and while I would have been satisfied with the kisses and embraces, she was adamant. "Get up," she said. "I asked the chamberlain for advice and she told me the best way." I obeyed but said: "Why did you ask her?" "I didn't know anyone else." After some adjustment she was on her back, with me kneeling between her legs, which were resting against me. She whispered: "We could do it like horses, but I want to see you." I liked seeing her too. She held her arms against herself demurely, and everything about her was endearing, even the half-limp wand resting on her. And I also had asked advice, though far earlier. As I spread the prepared oil into her with my finger, I couldn't imagine how it could feel as good as her crooning indicated. She pulled her legs against her and offered one of her hands. "Please hold me." And I did. After I felt she was becoming ready, I positioned myself ready to enter her. "Call me a girl." She spoke fast, almost delirious. Her hand squeezed mine so that the nails would have sunk into normal skin. "Your girl. This will make me girl, yours, yes. Oh, I'm scared." I told her she was my girl, and something less coherent about making her my wife, and pressed my member against her sphincter. I managed to enter the tightness only perhaps a knuckles worth. She squealed. "Oh no," she gasped. When I hesitated she continued: "Push in!" It took plenty of back and forth to work myself into her. By the time I was half inside, I was already nearing my orgasm. Next wanton trust slid fully inside, and I couldn't hold back. I came inside her. "I feel it! Oh dear!" But she hadn't come. I had been selfish in my treatment of her, but no more. I steeled myself, even if the sensation was intense, and continued to thrust inside her. She let out a yelp, when my hand wrapped around her penis. I clasped her firmly, and it didn't take much of milking, before I felt the pulse of her orgasm. I pulled out of her and climbed to the bed. "Thank you," Kir whispered. Kir was already dressed when I woke up at the first light. After cleaning myself, she was still waiting in the bedroom with a strange expression on her face. "Is something not alright?" I asked. "Yes. No. I just wanted to talk about yestereve." I motioned her sit to the bed and sat next to her. "You didn't tell if you liked it," she said. "Did you enjoy it?" "Well, it hurt. I'm still sore. But you made it feel good." I kissed her forehead. "Then I enjoyed it." She pressed her head on my chest. "I wish I was a girl all the way. What we did, it hurt, like it was something nobody should ever do. And when it wasn't painful, only thing that felt good was you. We can do it again if you want, but please not today at least." My breathing halted and my chest ached. Hurting her for my pleasure was not something I could bear. "We won't do it then. But let me dull the smarting." I pushed my hand under her butt and said the lesser words of healing. "Ooh!" She hugged me. "Thank you!" CHAPTER VIII: Marriage Madeise had been right about what the Vatin emissary would accept, especially when we presented the relative lax terms as undue influence of her on me. The emissary also agreed on the necessity of an immediate marriage. "I understand the benefit of a strong peace, but my testimony won't go unchallenged. This affair is unprecedented, and thus needs the approval of the gods. I am sure that you, Brilliance, can vouch for your gods, but not for ours. Not even our skyspeaker in her wisdom can, without the proper place and ritual." The Vatins left later that day. The emissary was going to try to break the news to his people as carefully as possible. I didn't envy him his task. Travelling as the person of the despot was always cumbersome. Doubly so when it was to a foreign, barely friendly, country. Too big of an escort would make for painfully slow travel and be easily interpreted as an invasion. Too small, and you'd seem like a pauper. And the poisoned knife had reminded me of my vulnerability. A small group of warriors couldn't kill me except with extraordinary luck, but a large one might manage. Or a small group of lesser sorcerers. Or a group of warriors supported by a lesser sorcerer. In the end my bodyguard was too large to move fast with all the needed baggage, and too small, should it need to execute a good fighting retreat back to the frontier against a whole Vatin army. I didn't like relying on my personal prowess when planning military affairs; anything could happen to a single man, no matter if he was a sorcerer or the despot. Still, we made good time through Peritland. At the frontier, the Vatin emissary and a group of priests welcomed us. They informed us that supplies would be brought on the whole way to Rtein. There was also a mixed group of locals, eagerly welcoming Kir. I was surprised how happy they were to see her, though perhaps they chiefly welcomed the end to the raids. Madeise blessed them all, which took a better part of the day, and we camped for a feast organized by the border folk. During our way to the mountains, Vatin lords with their small nimble escorts appeared to greet us and then excused themselves back to their lands or to quicker travel towards Rtein. I regarded them all with heaviest of suspicion, as all of them appeared to be gauging our strength, though beyond that they did seem sincere enough. But even with minimal pomp, the audiences dragged our travelling speed to a crawl. The land of the Vatins was austere in its beauty, and I often felt a fancy about disappearing into the endless plains, guarded valleys and steeply sloped forests with Kir. But she would never have agree to it, even if I had dared to ask. Her duty weighed on her even more than mine did on me. The bad thing for a despot to be a sorcerer is, that one becomes the focal point for enemy's desperation. They can delude themselves into believing that the sorcerer-despot is the linchpin, and that his death will cause the whole empire to crumble. Of course, that is false. Killing me wouldn't break Peritland. Killing all of our sorcerers wouldn't either, for that matter. Peritians would still have their armies, their farmlands, their trade and taxes, their cities and fortresses. But desperation tended to lack on rationality. It was early in the morning, but we were already moving at a good pace. Rtein was only a two or three days' march away, so I planned on making good time. Any lordling seeking an audience would get cold shoulder until I was married. A scout galloped over a small hill. His horn signalled: "An attack! Hundreds of horsemen! Heavy cavalry!" This was the bane of marching through hostile country while pretending everything to be friendly: one could get surprised even by a sizeable force. We had started to move to into a formation, when rows of Vatin riders rolled over the hill. Armour gleamed on man and horse, and their lances were like a forest. Their bows already sang arrows into air around us. Their war-cry rose shrill, with either the Vatin words 'kill the defiler' or 'kill the defiled'. Possibly both. I braced myself so I'd stay in control. I thought to use a bit of sorcery, to merely make them flee. No need to turn this into a massacre. But when an arrow thumped into Kir's saddle next to her lovely thigh, the fury was on me. I still barked the right commands. My riders formed around me, and we thundered towards the Vatins. They did their oldest trick of the feigned retreat, veering to the side and then away. We pressed forward, and they responded with raining arrows at us. But I sang the ground under their horse's hooves into swamp. I plucked their blood out of even their smallest wounds. I blunted the edge of their steel, and I stole the voices of their witches. I called down fire, lightning and the wrath of gods. When I came to, I was shivering, sitting on the flank of my dead horse. My clothes were scorched to shreds, and the carnage --and its stench!-- was unbearably thick around me. "Brilliance, we got the last of them," told the commander of my guard. "Ten deaths on our side. Twenty-six of our lads got wounded more than bruises and scratches. Nine of them could really use your help, Brilliance." I forced myself up. "Show me to the wounded." And he did. In addition to ours, there were plenty of the Vatins. I wanted to hurt them, much beyond what their whining and screams belied of their current suffering. But that was what they expected of me, and not what Kir did. I stopped the bleeding of everyone and healed whatever wounds I could. The Vatins would bear the fear of me, and the weight of my undue mercy, for the rest of their lives. "Where's Kir?" I suddenly asked. Immense guilt of not caring about her before struck me. "With the baggage, Brilliance." "Is she unhurt?" "Well, yes. You did command a squad to look after her and the baggage train." There was pride in the man's voice: for him it was obvious an entire whole squad of my guard could fend off anything the Vatins could have thrown at us. I took a horse and galloped it back to the baggage train. "Kir!" She rode to me with a lance in her hand. The way she held the weapon reminded me how she had been, and still was, a warrior. For a moment I stared blankly, until confusion was washed away by relief. "When your horse fell..." Kir said. "The guards didn't let me ride to you!" "You are unarmoured." "As are you." I could feel the shallow wounds from both arrows and blades around my body, but I smiled. Her smile twisted into a mask of anguish. She threw the lance into the ground and screamed. "Stupid! Pointless!" I jumped off my horse and helped her down from hers. She was shivering, not from fear but anger. "How you must hate me and us now," she wailed. "How we refuse you, despite your foolish attempts at peace!" I pressed her against me. "These weren't all of the Vatins. Just some of them with little sense and too much courage. I'm sorry. I planned to make them flee, but I wasn't able to control myself." "Did any of them survive?" "Wounded got gathered and I..." It felt oddly shameful. "I mended their bodies." "I want to see them." It was no use to try discouraging her. We went to the Vatin captives, who were gathering rocks and their dead for a cairn. They gave us sullen looks tinged with terror. One of them was braver, a lord who had been so courteous to us earlier on the road. He dropped the stone he had been carrying and cried: "We tremble in front of you mastery of trickery, o prince of warlocks! Do parade your bewitched toy in front of us, so we can see how your touch defiles!" "I'm not defiled." Kir jumped from her horse and strode to the Vatin lord. My heart leaped from the danger to her, but I kept myself back. "How much more mercy do you need to believe in good will?" she demanded. The lord was uncowed. "A warlock's mercy is but a trickier curse. Our skyspeaker would have gained from the lack of it. For one, he would not be the harlot for a foreign tyrant." "Then suffer the rest of your life as a 'curse!'" Kir turned around and strode back to her mount. We rode quite far away before her mask broke into dismay. The regret of healing the Vatins twisted inside me. I could have taken back the mercy, but that would had made Kir even more miserable. I had no fitting words. "Are you alright?" "No... Yes. We are soon at Rtein, and then they will have to believe that I'm not..." She turned her head away and didn't talk until supper, when her smile had returned. Next day several lords, accompanied with priests, came to apologize formally for the actions of 'the renegades'. Some of them we had met earlier. They were noticeably humbler now. Their friendly and respectable conduct made Kir happy, so I was happy to tolerate them, even if it meant additional day of travel before reaching Rtein. At least their presence deterred any further attempts at attacking us. Rtein was a large stone-crowned hill at the root of a steep mountain range. A sea of tents sprawled from it towards the plains. Large crowd welcomed us to the sparse town next to Rtein, and while plenty were joyous, there was no scarcity of sullen miens and wrathful looks. "Do we have to do some ceremony before ascending?" I asked. "No," Kir said. "We can go straight up with the priest. The feasts will be afterwards." I couldn't say I was much looking forward to the horse meat and milk 'delicacies', but I wanted the marriage done and secure. "It's getting dark. We should hurry." It turned out the most venerable Vatin priest of their order, who was still able to ride, had already gone to the top, so me and Kir proceeded to the steps. They were too steep for horses, so we had to walk. I wanted to impress her with a feat of strength, so I picked Kir up, but the stairs were unending, and soon I had compensate my body with spellcraft. Yet we reached the wind-whipped top with plenty of my strength to spare. "This must be good luck, the groom carrying the bride all the way," Kir said. "I have no knowledge about that." I let her down. "I just know that, in my experience, you horse-riders have easily tiring dainty little feet." The temple was collection of ancient pillars on top of a massive chiselled block of stone. First I thought it was but a ruin, but further inspection seemed to indicate it never had a roof. The priest was waiting for us by a stone altar. I never had thought I would get married in such a private ceremony at the end the earth, but then again, I had never thought much about marrying. "Good, good," the venerable man said. "It was getting chilly." The ritual itself was straightforward, though it did involve numerous vows and counter-vows until I wasn't quite keeping track of who was promising what. Then the Vatins revealed that this was the point: in front of the gods human words were empty, and only the thoughts mattered. The priest offered the draught of ritual sealing to Madeise, and she drank deep. I took the bowl and drank. Or tried to. Immediately as the liquid touched my tongue I knew it was horrible but tasteless poison. The priest was backing away. I started to flick him with force enough to break bones, when I heard Kir's gurgle. She was on her knees before I could catch her. I tried to neutralize the poison in her throat and stomach, but it was no earthly substance. I could feel it burn like fire and acid inside her. I shouted the words of healing while Kir stared at me with desperate eyes. She froze and was like stone. The hill top had disappeared into a shining mist. All was silent. I lifted my gaze and saw what I knew was a god at the edge of my vision. The air was still. Time was frozen for the instant. "What is this, godling of the Vatins?" I demanded. Once I might have feared a god, even a minor one, but the battle fury was threatening to take over. "If it be a test of how much I would give for her, I won't bargain. Take everything. My might, my empire, my life, so she can live." "This is no test," the god said. "She will die from the corruption. The vile sacrilege of tainting the blessed draught will curse the priest, all of his ancestors and all of his descendants." Strength left my legs, and I fell to my knees. "Why are you here then? To see me humbled? I won't deny my pride." "I have my reasons." Time began again as the scream of the wind. I turned and lifted Madeise to sit. She fumbled for my hands with hers. "Asikh--" Blood poured from her mouth. "Ksh..." I leaned down and pressed my lips on hers. Despite the taste of blood, bile and poison, the kiss was sweet. But when the lips felt cold, only bitterness remained. CHAPTER IX: Return When I got back down with my Kir, they had caught the murderer. Somehow the other priests had known what had happened --as they claimed, by the sudden guidance of gods-- and the murderer was to be tortured to death with all haste. His motive had simply been my death; the skyspeaker would reincarnate and thus her death had been an acceptable loss. According to the murderer, the next skyspeaker would be free of the foreign tyrant's influence, thus this vile deed of murder would eventually be recognized as virtuous. He held a lengthy speech forgiving his unwitting tormentors, until the preliminary tortures became too painful for him to do anything else than scream. He did still manage to prophesy about a coming skyspeaker, who would unite the Vatins against their enemies, make riches flood to them and finally kill the immortal warlock tyrant. At least the other priests had the sense to profusely reject any divine inspiration in the deeds and words of their executed colleague. I didn't care to believe them, as a barely in-control sorcerer with small army was a great incentive for lying. Yet, more death couldn't undo death, and I let them be. War would have been tiresome. I headed home after Madeise's funeral. My mind was filled with the need to join her and, I regretted of not having drank the draught fully. No poison I had available would have ended me, and I pondered how to convince my guard commander to ride me down with a lance. He would have had to aim to the head, but it might have worked. But the matters of government were like shackles on numb limbs. Perhaps Nunim could have taken over as the despot, but not without a sizeable bloodshed. We hadn't prepared for the succession so soon, out of my foolish arrogance. Peritians didn't deserve the misery of a civil war, just because I myself couldn't deal with the misery everyone was bound to suffer. The Vatins didn't bother us on the way back home. Apparently the priests had sensed how I 'had been touched by one of their gods', which made me a sort of saint to the Vatins, a minor version of the skyspeaker. That was good for them, for little mercy was left in me. The splendour of the palace mocked me, when I slithered back to my nest. EPILOGUE She had enjoyed the thought that I was a fair ruler, and so I strove to be just, though it gave me scarce pleasure. No doubt I will be remembered as a tyrant, for the chief victims of my rule are the likes of those, from whose letters and diaries I too learned about the past. The great landowners, the high nobles, the magnates, the men and women of good standing but no true crimes, these I brought low without mercy in my grab for more power. Lest I seem like a hero to someone who puts little worth to the rightful order of society, I also murdered the weak, fearing they might become strong. Disgruntled voices were quelled as rebellions, traitors were ended in several generations, gifted children were blasted as rival sorcerers. My power was a thing depraved, only existing to grow itself. The Vatins had chosen their new skyspeaker, but the frontier had calmed considerably, and I could push the matter out of my mind. Two decades later, when a messenger announced that the skyspeaker wanted to meet me, in order to refresh the friendly relations of our peoples, I was more than annoyed. In fact I was furious. But it was better to open my own wounds instead of the frontier's. I gritted my teeth and accepted as courteously as I could. The skyspeaker arrived a week later, apparently already on the way before I had received the message. The skyspeaker was now a woman, barely out of girlhood. I had to accept that selecting a girl was a gracious gesture to honour my Kir. She had the same hair and eyes, which while common among Vatins, forced the emergency trance on me. Hidden behind the emotionless mask, I barely heard the exchange of diplomatic platitudes. I was startled when I noticed that the skyspeaker had stepped on my dais. She must have acquired the means to kill me, and this whole meeting was an excuse to set up my assassination. Oh, how the poets would sing: the foolish tyrant finally slain; with the shadow of remembered love. And I welcomed it. The skyspeaker merely stared at me with a half-smile that I would have found endearing, if it wasn't a bitter reminder. "Brilliance. Don't you remember me?" She took a step forward. "Your Kir?" I was worse than stabbed with a poisoned dagger. How could the Vatins dare? Brainwash a young girl to think she was a now dead woman, just to seduce a foreign warlock. I shrunk from the eidolon that was oppressing me by stirring memories. She leaned over me like a snake preparing to kill, and whispered to my ear the secret of how I 'tasted'. I stared at her, too stunned to speak. I didn't believe, I couldn't, but I allowed her to continue her whispers. For a length she told me things only Madeise would have known, and details about me I hadn't even realized myself. Eventually I noticed she was sitting on my lap. Her arms were wrapped around my neck and mine were around her thin waist. She was so small now, but I could see Madeise in her expressions. "It is really you?" I whispered. "Or is it just the memories?" "The skyspeaker does indeed reincarnate, Brilliance. The memories came with the soul. But unlike usually, as my last life was cut short, the gods granted me this sweet remembrance." She stabbed me with a kiss and continued: "I would have come sooner, but I wanted to wait for all of my memory to return. And it would have been awkward to come bodily unripe, pining for love." I realized the reception hall was not empty of audience. But I couldn't then care much about the business at hand, so I had the herald shoo everyone out. For long I merely held her in silence, afraid that any movement would break the illusion and wake me to a reality that would afterwards be too joyless to endure. "I love you, Asikhat." "And I love you... What's your name now?" "The priests saw early I that I was going to recover my memory, so I was named Kir and Madeise." I didn't pretend to know how the Vatin names worked, but continued into a starved kiss. She pulled back. "We should discuss the situation of the frontier." "Yes... We should discuss," I echoed. I kissed her again, the last shreds of painful doubt purged. "I did not mean like that." She giggled. "I was born as a woman this time. So it would be inappropriate for you to take me to your chambers, until we are married. You do still want to marry me?" "How could I not?" "Good. Because I think it will be necessary. My people have seen the value of peace, but it has stretched for long now. Our herds are large and the sons of the Vatins many. They --we-- might become eager for war again. You must reinforce your status as a godtouched, a holy man of our faith." She stared at me with her coy smile. "By sowing your seed in the skyspeaker." I was ready for the duty, and she must have felt the rigidity below her. I asked: "Do we have to go all the way to Rtein before that?" "Yes. I arranged for a loyal priest, a borderer grown fat with Peritian trade, to wait for us there. We could ride out, right now. Without an escort it shouldn't take too many days." She moved her legs, so she was straddled on my lap, and leaned to my chest. "I need you. For a decade I have had confusing memories about you, growing ever more frustrating as I understood them better. But I'm the skyspeaker. Even if we did it in secret, it would be known." I was convinced. Nunim arrived quickly for making the necessary arrangements. "Sure, Brilliance. I can handle the running matters during your absence," Nunim said, almost flippant. "No troubles on that front. I'm sure people will welcome the thought of you not being the sour bastard you have been." "Good. One more thing, Nunim. The matter of succession." I pushed Kir behind me and took the formal posture of challenge. "Are you going to start trouble yourself?" Nunim laughed. "Gods no! I will merely be glad that my position stops being that of the heir-apparent. I get attempts on my life almost bi- monthly, you know. But if I'm still around when you are dead, I'll challenge your whelps. But only if they aren't up to the task." "That is all I can ask for, my friend." We clasped hands and did the awkward 'no-need-to-kill-you-now' hug of Peritian sorcerers with surprising tenderness. With two spare mounts, we travelled as fast as I could, Kir being the better rider of us. While we rode, she sang to me. Her voice was plucked me like a musician at the strings. I couldn't help but force the still frosty ground to push out flowers, so I could make garlands for her. We pretended we were vagrants, or young elopers, and tarried at beautiful and hidden places. Despite the weariness of the road, I had to use the words of sleep to have any rest next to her in our cosy tent. AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thank you for reading! If you liked it (and even if not, I guess), feel free to distribute, alter and do whatever you want with this text. I apologize for hiding such a lengthy denouement in the epilogue. Kind of bad form to hide the happy ending there, like it was something to be ashamed off. Maybe I'm a tiny bit self-conscious about writing... Whatever this is. Pulpy fantasy with overbearing political elements thoroughly transfixed by a (very tame) 'bodice ripper'? But to be honest, I don't mind; I was pandering to myself on plenty of bases here. Hopefully it's enjoyable to an audience. All rights are waived, CC0.