CHARLES CLAIRE KALISTAChapter 35
- 4 years ago
- 29
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I came back down dressed for the spa, Sarah was already in, so I checked and asked, “You do have a suit on, right Sarah?”
She stood up and had on a beautiful one-piece swimsuit, that had the American Flag on it, but there was a mesh portion over the bosom area that flashed a bit more ‘skin’ than I had been expecting. I got in and turned my back to her saying, “Be gentle, Mrs. Robinson,” which caused her to laugh a bit.
Just as she was starting to rub my shoulders, everybody came through the front door, with Claire shrieking, “I am a C cup – I am a C cup, Saaarrraaaaahhh, Charles, I am a C cup!”
Sarah yelled, “We’re out in the spa honey, come on out. Let’s see the girls?”
I turned my head to Sarah and questioned her, “What?”
She said quietly, “The girls, the boobs, the twins — when you have a pair worth looking at, they’re called ‘the girls.’ I guess that phrase wasn’t in any dictionary you read, was it, Charles?”
Annie and Kalista came out to see us, with Mom saying, “She’s going to put on a new swimsuit. Charles, don’t say anything you’ll regret to her – eye contact buster. Is that a new suit Sarah, I have never seen it before?”
“I got it for Charles a while back, first time I have worn it,” she said proudly.
“I am going to put on my suit too, be right back,” Kalista said leaving in a flash.
I was leaning back into Sarah’s built-in pillows a little. Mom looked at me and said, “You look ... comfortable Charles.”
“Mom, chill out, please – we got all the pants lengthened, and this is our treat.”
“I see that, but is it your treat, or hers?”
Sarah exploded, pushing me off of her, “I am getting tired of your innuendo, Annie. Charles — get up, I am getting out ... I’ll find something else to do that won’t offend your mother!”
She quickly got up and out of the spa, grabbing her stuff as she left.
“Wait – Sarah, don’t ... Great Mom, just great – because of your jealousy, I have to suffer Sarah being embarrassed like that. I am getting out too. I am going up to my room, if that’s all right with you?”
She slapped me ... hard, in the face.
With sarcasm aplenty, I said, “Great, did that help, at all? I hope you didn’t hurt your hand? We wouldn’t want the high and mighty Annie Newman to have a sore hand.”
I passed Claire on the stairs, telling her how beautiful she looked, and said, “I’m going to go listen to some music in my room.”
After spending about fifteen minutes listening to music for future routines, there was a rap on my door. I took out my ear buds.
“Yeah,” I yelled though the door.
“Can I come in please, Charles?”
“Yeah, you are welcome in here, Sarah – leave the door open, so she-who-should–not–be-named, can’t accuse us of anything.”
Giggling over my retort, she sat on the bed, a fair distance from me.
I looked at her, and I saw she had been crying ... I was too mad to cry. She put her hand on my face where Mom had slapped me, rubbing it gently, “I’m so sorry!”
I leaned forward, nibbling on her ear a little, and putting my hand on her flat tummy.
“Stop it,” she said giggling. “We have some things to discuss, Loverboy.”
“Anything more important than me telling you how stunning you are?” I said, kissing her on her neck some more.
“Don’t ... distract me dear,” she said pulling away. “We’re making the commercial for the Chevy Dealership that’s gifted us the Suburban tomorrow morning, and Mr. Bublé and his people are coming over tomorrow afternoon to make a commercial for the SST Tour.”
“Are Claire and I doing anything in these, other than just standing there?” I said moving my kisses to her face.
“They both may want a little bit of dance, but nothing you guys can’t handle,” Sarah responded also giving out a little moan.
I asked, “What else is there, before we start practicing for the Tour?” I was rubbing her neck right behind her ear.
“If you’ll ... stop that for a minute, I’ll tell you, Charles,” Sarah said playfully slapping at my hand. “That’s it. We left open the ten days before Labor Day, so you guys can practice, or not. Maybe learn something new, or whatever? We got the SST Schedule for the first twenty-eight cities, starting right here at the Columbus Performing Arts Center, two days after Labor Day.”
She added, “We’ll be practicing all day Labor Day, and the following day, then starting our Tour at the Battelle North Room at The Performing Arts Center, which can hold twenty-two hundred people, after you bring in Michael’s orchestra.”
“Besides your weekly, negotiated salary, Michael has sent an addendum to our contract, which says, we get two percent of the gross gate, three percent, if there’s a technical sell-out. Those percentages will be in place for every venue in every state we travel to.”
“Wow, Sarah – I honestly never thought of gate fees. I thought only rock stars commanded a percent of the gate.”
“Well, Charles – I suppose Michael considers you a draw, and a rock star.”
“I could be your Rock Star, Sarah – you rock my world,” I said touching her ... beautiful neck.
“Charles – Stop it?” She grinned, but I could tell she was enjoying the flirting. I know I was, too much. She pushed my face away.
“After that, we travel by our new Chevy Suburban, to 28 cities in 86 days — including, in order, Dayton and Cincinnati, Ohio; Louisville then Lexington, Kentucky; Knoxville and Nashville, Tennessee; Birmingham, Alabama; Jackson, Mississippi; New Orleans, Louisiana; over to Mobile, Alabama, then five stops in Florida; Tallahassee, Tampa, Miami, along with Orlando and Jacksonville.”
“Will we have time to go to Walt Disney World, Lover?” I asked.
“Absotively, Posilutely,” she replied, smiling at me.
“And when we’re in Memphis, can we go see Graceland if we have time?”
“You bet, Charles – Do you want to hear the rest of the Tour?”
“Sorry, Gorgeous – uhm ... I guess I better stop calling you that?”
“Not even – you can call me anything, anytime, X?” she said a bit defiantly, but still quite seductively.
“Go ahead, and tell me the rest of the tour please, Mrs. Robinson?”
That made Sarah laugh, which made me laugh. We took a moment, looking into each other’s eyes.
Sarah pulled away saying, “OK, where was I, oh yeah; Jacksonville. Next is Savannah, Atlanta and Augusta, Georgia; Charleston, South Carolina, then up to Charlotte and over to Raleigh, North Carolina.”
“Then off to Richmond, Virginia; Washington DC; Baltimore, Maryland; Harrisburg then Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; Akron, Ohio and then coming back home for about four days.”
“Where will we be on October 15th?” I asked playing with her hair a little while asking.
“We perform on the fourteenth, in Miami, I suppose we could spend a whole day in Walt Disney World, maybe even celebrate a ninth birthday?” Sarah said with a sparkle in her eye.
“Call and find out if WEDCO would like Charles & Claire, and the Sparkling Kalista, to perform on that day, somewhere in the park,” I asked Sarah. “If not, we’ll just go there, and have some fun.”
There was a knock on the door, “Go where and have fun, Charles?” Kalista asked walking in.
“Sarah was telling me about the first leg of the SST Tour, and we were discussing things to do, besides performing ... you know stuff to do for fun,” I white-lied.
“Kalista, please go find Claire, I want to practice dancing with my girls,” I said.
She left, squealing at the top of her lungs, “CLAAAIIIRRREEE!”
I got up, giving Sarah a quick kiss on the mouth and said, “Spare no expense at Walt Disney World, Sarah – I want everything that’s available for the five of us to do, OK?”
“All right, Loverboy – what do I get on my birthday?” She looked quite sexy the way she said that.
“I don’t know when your birthday is, Sarah?” I answered honestly, “What would you like for your birthday?”
What a loaded question!
Sarah was looking me up and down, actually licking her lips, and she said, “March 29th is my birthday Loverboy,” she said, “During Nationals, next year.”
“Keep this to yourself beautiful, but I am not completely sure we’ll be doing Nationals, after all,” I said putting a lock of her hair behind her ear. She leaned into my hand, growling.
I had no real plans to skip Nationals. I said that to her, to test her new promise of ‘no leaks’. We headed downstairs – I reached for her butt, but she grabbed my hand and said, “Be-have!”
Kalista had Claire and Annie out back on the dance floor; Sarah and I joined them.
“OK, everybody, here’s the plan. First, we go through all of our routines involving a Michael Bublé number. If the routine is between Claire and me, we’ll do it first, then I’ll go over it as well with Kalista. When we get to a Kalista routine, she and I’ll perform it first, then Claire and I’ll go over the same number.”
“When we get to a number that I did with Annie, Kalista and I’ll re-learn it together and when we get to a song I did with Sarah, Claire and I’ll go over it. We’ll do this until nightfall, or until we get too tired to continue. We’ll pick it up again at our first convenience in the morning.”
“We’ll be adding, some ‘show moves,’ like easy Developés, Side Lunges and Rondés to our routines. Do you have your show underwear on girls?”
“CHARLES!” Annie said with clear indignation in her voice.
“Mom, there’s no other way to say it, or ask it, so I did; get over it, please — OK?”
Both girls responded by saying ‘yes,’ blushing a bit, and giggling loudly.
“Also, before the two Moms go ballistic, I still love you both and plan to dance with you, while we’re on the road. But, for the next six days, it’s going to be just Charles, Claire, and Kallie dancing. I need you to understand, that you are loved — but right now, I am ready to focus on dancing with my girls. Ladies, have patience with me please? Since I’ll be alternating between Claire and Kalista, could Annie or Sarah please man the boom box, please?”
I saw Annie and Sarah look at each other, and then Mom broke for the player, saying, “Which song, Honey-Buns?” and flashed a big smile at me, mouthing ‘I am sorry’.
“Excuse me girls, for a second,” I left and walked over to Annie, and we embraced each other. I whispered in her ear, “You know you have got the better smile and butt, than Sarah does.”
She whispered back, “I know,” and she giggled.
I love her.
Walking back to the girls, I yelled, “‘Everything,’ please Annie. Kallie, come here,” We danced the routine, opening up the moves a little. I showed K what a lunge and a Rondé are, and we quickly got through it.
Claire came up to me, I nodded to Annie to start it over; it was a perfect replication of what Kalista and I’d done only a few minutes before...
You are a falling star,
you are the getaway car
You are the line in the sand
when I go too far
You are the swimming
pool on an August day
And you are the perfect
thing to see
And you play
you are coy,
but it’s kinda cute
Oh, when you smile at me
you know exactly
what you do
Baby, don’t pretend that
you don’t know it’s true
Cause you can see it
when I look at you
And in this crazy life,
and through
these crazy times
It’s you, it’s you;
you make me sing
You are every line,
you are every word,
you are everything
You are a carousel,
you are a wishing well
And you light me up
when you ring my bell
You are a mystery,
you are from outer space
You are my every minute
of my everyday
And I can’t believe,
uh, that I am your man
And I get to kiss you,
baby, just because I can
Whatever comes our way,
oh, we’ll see it through
And you know that’s
what our love can do
And in this crazy life,
and through
these crazy times
It’s you, it’s you;
you make me sing
You are every line,
you are every word,
you are everything
So, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
So, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
And in this crazy life,
and through
these crazy times
It’s you, it’s you;
you make me sing
You are every line,
you are every word,
you are everything
You are every song,
and I sing along
Cause you are my everything
Yeah, yeah
So, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
So, la, la, la, la, la, la-la-la, la-la-la
We very quickly got through it, plus the thirteen songs we’d previously choreographed, and moved on to the other Bublé music, we had yet to deal with. We started with ‘I Can’t Help Falling in Love with You,’ which I did first with K, creating a brand spanking new routine, to the beautiful waltz tempo of the song.
Next was one of the faster songs that Michael sings, it’s a Paso Doble, and it’s called ‘It Had Better Be Tonight’. I created a routine for Claire and me.
I then went back to ‘I Can’t Help Falling in Love with You,’ switching to Claire. Both girls were watching each other very carefully, making sure they did matching moves, for when I changed partners. I was quite proud of both of them. Not a single word between them, except ‘Excuse me’ as they swapped out, giving each other a high five each time they did. That usually prompted a giggle from one or both of them.
Both of these girls were showing me how much they wanted to please me, by not complaining a bit during our marathon dance lesson. Last new dance of the night would be to ‘I Got a Crush on You,’ a Slow Samba.
This would make a nice dance for either Annie or Sarah to dance with.
I looked over at the girls, and saw their eyes drooping, so I called it a night. Both girls said they could keep going, if I really wanted. I wore them out, and come to think of it, my feet were a little sore.
“Sarah, could you bring in the boom box and the music please, I need to talk to Annie alone for a moment?”
She nodded OK to me, as I grabbed my mom’s arm and we walked inside together. She leaned into me as we walked, and we went into the living room and sat down. I kicked off my shoes, groaning in relief. She took my leg and put it on her lap, rubbing my foot, ankle and leg.
I heard a whimper from her, and I asked, “What’s wrong, Mom?”
She picked up her head and said, “I am ... so ashamed for slapping you, Charles. Can you ever forgive me for that?” She had big tears rolling down her cheeks.
“Mom, I was asking for it, mouthing off like I did. I want us to be OK again, can we?”
“Hand me your other leg, sweetheart? Charles, you were right, I was ... I am ... jealous of Sarah. I can never be the one you flirt with. My husband left me; but her husband ... wasn’t even her husband! I don’t know what I would have done, given the same set of circumstances.”
“Mom, you are the best Mom I have ever had, and will ever have, so I’d like to flirt with you, if you can handle it. I can be appropriate when in front of the rest of the ladies, but flirting with my mom sounds really naughty, and maybe — a little bit of naughty is what you need in your life?”
Her hands felt so nice on my legs.
“Charles, I am truly amazed at how grown up you have become. You are taller than me, you handle all kinds of grown up situations and decisions so well. You have become the man in my life — I am very proud of my son.”
“And I am very proud of my hot mama, with the pretty face and the nice butt.”
“When have you ever checked out my butt, Charles?” She was fishing.
“Every time, you have on a swim suit, and some of your new dresses really make your tushie, look good enough to touch.”
“Charles!” She giggled and was shocked at the same time, blushing a little.
“What, Mom – can’t handle being told you are a hottie. Didn’t Dad ‘ever’ say anything to you, about how beautiful you are?”
“No, Charles – He didn’t have time for any of that. Sometimes, I wonder how he ever had time to make babies with me.”
“Well, I am sure glad you two made some babies, because you are the most wonderful woman I could ever hope to be my mom.”
I leaned into her and started a kiss on her lips. She seemed unsure of what exactly was happening, so I put my hand behind her head and put some real pressure to her lips. I felt her lips respond, and her mouth opened, as did mine. We were now in full make-out mode. I saw Sarah on the stairs ... giving me a thumbs up.
I closed my eyes and separated from my mother, giving her a peck on her nose and said “Good Night, Hot Lips. See you in the morning. Wear something tight tomorrow for the commercials, OK?”
“OK, Loverboy – that sure was naughty, but it sure was nice. Goodnight.” She went towards me and wanted another one, just like Sarah did. I love them both so much.
The next morning, we got up and got dressed in our dark blue outfits, with Kalista in black, and the Moms, both in tight red dresses. We took the Chevy to the Dealership, getting there a little early, and they had a guy take the Suburban away for a moment, while we worked out the details of the commercial.
It was decided, that Roscoe Martin, owner of Martin’s Chevrolet, would do all the talking, and we’d dance into the camera shot, waving at the camera. Claire and I practiced a few moves, when I had a minor epiphany.
I pulled Claire aside and we talked about a few things, when our Suburban pulled up, with a big vinyl sign that had been put on it... “The Something Special Tour, with Charles, Claire and Kallie” in one-foot-tall lettering, that wrapped around both sides of the SUV. Our website was also on both sides of the Chevy. Charles.claire.kalista@musiccom [not real]
On the back door, was a vinyl sign, with the Charles, Claire and Kallie pose from the posters. The girls both shrieked as they saw their faces on the back of the Suburban.
I walked up to Roscoe and gave him my idea, which he loved. He got the cameraman to back up and set up on top of a nearby vehicle. He had a cordless mike so distance wouldn’t be a practical problem.
I yelled up at the cameraman, “Film the rehearsals, please?”
He looked at Roscoe who said, “You heard him, Ronnie, film the rehearsals!”
Roscoe stepped forward, and started his scripted lines:
“Everybody at Martin’s Chevrolet wants to Congratulate Charles, Claire and Kalista as they start on their Something Special Tour. We, at Martins Chevrolet, want to help, so we’re donating the use of this brand new, fully loaded Chevrolet Suburban to Charles & Claire, on their Tour across the Country, so we hope Charles & Claire have people across the country dancing in circles to see their Tour.”
After they filmed that twice, Claire and I got the boom box out, and asked Mom for the ‘Six-Pack,’ I sent Kallie to just outside camera left, while Claire and I stood just outside camera right. I had Annie ready to start the music and Sarah with a timer, so we’d take fifteen seconds to get from right to left behind Roscoe, I would swap to Kallie, off camera, and take fifteen seconds to come back, in front of Roscoe.
The first time we tried, we took too long to get over, so we stopped, and started again. The second time we got to Kallie in fourteen seconds, swapped and came back doing the exact same steps. Not quite, but close enough.
“Ready Roscoe, say the same thing you just said and don’t change anything, or it won’t match up in editing. Everybody ready for this?” I asked. I heard a number of ‘hell yesses’. We had a contingent of salespersons and patrons all watching, who I had asked to please stay quiet.
Roscoe said, “Anytime, Bossman.” Everybody laughed at that, including his employees.
“Start the music on my nod, Annie ... and go...”
The music started, nine seconds in we started, along with Roscoe, Claire and I were dancing and moving towards Kallie, who was ready and didn’t miss a step on our pass back, to camera right. I looked at Sarah, who said, “thirty seconds exactly guys,” and there was a big whoop.
Roscoe came over and said, “That’s going to help me sell a butt-load of vehicles, Charles – Thanks a lot for taking a blah commercial idea and turning it into a production number like that.”
“Consider the Suburban your payment from all of us at Martin’s Chevrolet. Let me sign over the pinks to you guys. Who’s going to be the owner of the vehicle, Charles?”
“C-Cask LLC will be the proud owner of a beautiful Suburban from Martin’s Chevrolet. Where is your daughter Carolyn, who helped getting us all together?”
“Behind you, Charles.”
I reached for her and she let me pull her up into my arms. She gave me a great big kiss right on the lips.
“Carolyn, I told you ‘on the cheek,’ a peck ‘on the cheek,’” Roscoe said, a little embarrassed. Carolyn certainly wasn’t!
Kalista said, “Don’t worry, Mr. Martin, there are 50,000 other girls just like your daughter who’d like to do that? Only Carolyn did ... and they won’t.”
Everybody laughed, with Annie snorting as we got ourselves together to leave.
I shook hands with Roscoe, Ronnie the cameraman, and gave Carolyn a hug goodbye. We all left for home, which was only ten minutes away.
Kalista was leaning into me, and Claire and I held each other’s hands as we got home.
After helping my girls out of the Suburban, I went up to Sarah and thanked her and Mom for their help getting things done.
“Everybody keep what you have got on, on. Michael and his people will be here within the hour, take it easy and sit back. After they are gone, we’ll all ‘change into something more comfortable’ and do some more rehearsal with the newer Bublé music.”
There was a knock at the front door, about forty minutes later, with Michael, and a crew of people. He directed them to the back yard and said, “Great” as he saw the dance floor was up.
I walked up to him and he asked, “Are you enjoying yourselves, everybody? It’s getting close, isn’t it? Everybody looks great today. Anything special you want to do, Charles? Got something new to show off? I have been seeing your posters everywhere I go, could I get a set?”
“Sure, Mr. Bublé,” said Kalista. “I’ll get some for you, when Charles says to.”
“Michael,” I said, “We have a brand-new routine, but it’s not to one of your songs?”
“What song is it to, Charles?” Michael asked with a smirk on his face.
“The song ‘For Good’ from WICKED. We have had a single rehearsal to it, but we could do it. Or we have over thirty of your songs with a routine to it, that either Kalista or Claire can perform to. I plan to have a routine to every one of your songs before our first rehearsal together.”
“That’s not necessary, Charles,” Michael said. “Especially any with the word remix in the title.”
“Sir, we have a contract ... to dance for you, not to learn to dance for you, so I feel compelled to create a routine for every piece of music in your repertoire, Michael.”
“OK, Charles – fine, dump anything with remix, or that has another person singing with me; I have decided to take this tour alone ... with just you guys. That’s how much I think of you. Most of the first leg is selling fast, probably due to the three of you.”
“Anyway, what’re we doing here today, Michael? Are you singing and we’re dancing, and some faceless person comes along and says something like ‘Ladies and Gentlemen – Boys and Girls, Coming soon to a dance floor near you, Grammy Winning singer Michael Bublé, along with the dance styling’s of Charles, Claire and the Sparkling Kalista. You have seen them on YouTube, now see them in person – coming soon ... to where you live.”
“PERFECT,” said Michael, “Can you say that again for the commercial? And it’s Multiple Grammy Winning singer?” he said with a smile, and a chuckle.
“Michael, you have hired us to dance, nothing more,” I responded with a hint of exasperation.
He was staring at me so hard, I relented. “OK, all right – I’ll do it, can I do that first and get it out of the way, please?”
“Sure, Charles,” Michael said.
It was fresh in my head, so I waited for a sound check, then I did it twice, taking a little longer, so it’d be thirty seconds, and I was done.
“How about ‘The Way You Look Tonight, Michael?’ We learned a new routine just last night to it and, I could easily switch between the girls a couple of times in those thirty seconds?”
“Wonderful, Charles – that’s one of my favorites, being a Sinatra song,” Michael said.
“Actually Michael, Fred Astaire performed it first, in 1936, in the film SWING TIME when it won the Oscar for best Original Song, since then there have been at least thirty-three covers...”
“Charles,” Annie said.
“Sorry, guys – since I remember every song I have ever heard, it’s hard not to go into minutia sometimes.”
We gathered up everyone and moved to the dance floor, Michael had a mike in his hand, with the girls and me, off to the side. The minus track was started, with Claire and I immediately dancing, changing out to Kallie when Michael started to sing seventeen seconds in.
About ten seconds more and I switched back to Claire, who did some quick Cha-Cha Rondés in place, which really spiced it up, surprising Michael a bit, but he went on until we heard, ‘cut and print’.
Michael thanked us for our time, we confirmed our Labor Day rehearsal start and place, and they all left.
“I know I said we’d rehearse some more, but I need a bit of a rest people, if that’s OK?”
Sarah came up to me and asked, “How’s your back, Charles? I can give you a rubdown, if you need it?”
“Sarah – thanks for the offer, but my legs hurt a little, and my mom gives me my foot and leg rubs. She’s been doing it since I was five years old; you can have my back as needed, but my mommy gets my legs,” I said.
“And what parts do Kalista and I get, Loverboy?” Claire said with her hands high on her hips.
I blushed and said, “Make me an offer, Beautiful?”
After my foot and leg rub from Annie, I lay down for a little while. Something jolted me awake, and I got up and went downstairs, and two little kids ran up to me, grabbing my hands and said, “Daddy. You are awake, Daddy, we want you and Mommy to dance for us, please?”
Daddy? Mommy? I have kids? Wow, I don’t know what’s been causing all these dreams lately, but at least I haven’t woken up in prison, yet.
A beautiful blonde came out of the kitchen, and said, “Kids, stop pestering your father, he works hard all day and he needs his rest when he gets home from teaching dance.”
I don’t know this woman ... who’s this? I wonder; I walk over to her and give her a really nice kiss. I say, “You sure look very pretty today.” I try to give her another kiss, but she pulled away.
“Not in front of your children, Charles? I am just the nanny here; your wife is laying down in the living room. But, that was a nice kiss, what brought that on? I have always wanted you to kiss me, but Wow!”
“Is Charles up?” I heard from the next room over.
“Yes, Mrs. Newman, Charles is up ... and frisky,” she said, slapping me on the butt as I walked in to see my wife, Claire. Oh, my ... she still has eyes that brighten up a room, although her hair is kind of short now.
She puts out her hands so I can pull her up to her feet. I give her a truly inspiring kiss. However old she is at this point; her chest certainly has ... become magnificent. She catches my eyes looking at them and she smiles saying, “I knew growing these would finally get your attention away from my mother.”
“The girls sure do look nice, Claire – they look good enough to...”
“Charles, not in front of the kids, or Barbara. I knew, when we met her, during the Tour in Eastern Europe, that she’d be a wonderful nanny for our children. You seem to like her, don’t you?”
“Yes, dear, she seems nice, but she’s no Claire, or Kallie for that matter, or even Sarah,” I said.
“Well, thank you, and my little sister thanks you as well. She should be home from college any time now.”
I don’t recognize the house I am in, it’s not either the home I grew up in, or the McArthur house we moved to after that. I must be doing well, because it sure looks nice. We must have at least five bedrooms, what with two kids, Barbara and Kallie.
“Charles, I am taking the kids to Cotillion, and I am gonna stay to see how Brian and Susan are doing as the new teachers. It’s so sad that Jimmy died. But the Cotillion keeps on, now of course called the Newman Family Cotillion. Your mother sure knows how to run a business, doesn’t she?”
“Well, Sarah’s no slouch at it either, kiddo,” I said. “Remember how well she organized the SST?” I am trying to keep up ... it’s like the ultimate interactive video game, but with kissing.
“That’s right, she did. Can you believe she’d end up with Michael Bublé? They seem happy; he makes money — she spends money.”
The Announcer came on: “Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls; school’s out and guess who’s back joining us? Charles & Claire!” A wonderful round of applause came up from the crowd, the returning kids smiled at us, the new kids glared at us. “But they are last today, so let’s get started.” He went on to announce the first competitors and it began. Things were moving along, I felt a bit more nervous than usual. Claire came up to me and said, “Charles, remember we’re waltzing today, this...
About three hours later, we’d gone through our new routines, polishing them all up a bit—also going over every routine we’d won a trophy using. Some of those were quite fun, since we hadn’t performed them in such a long while. “LUNCH!” The three of us all came in to see a layout of food that was amazing; we had lasagna or meatloaf to choose from. Also, there were Pan-fried home-made French fries, which is a specialty of the ladies, and the usual Salad Bar, but it had more things to choose...
“Wow, Charles—that’s quite ambitious and crazy, like you said. The minute we touch down, I will do all I can to make that happen. You certainly have been the showman this past year, introducing me, special guests that I sprung on you at the last minute like Idina and adding those fantastic musical routines that include all of your ... harem,” Michael said. “That’s what you pay me the big bucks for Michael,” I said, feeling a pull on my shirtsleeve. It was Claire, who wanted a kiss. Never...
By the time I looked it up, Claire had gone back into our room, Kalista was looking for a suit and the ladies went back to their room to change. “Charles, I may need you to put some sunscreen on me, later?” Kalista said swishing her hips as she went into her bathroom. She knows how to turn me on! I got up and saw my fiancée walking out of our bathroom, with a delicious red bikini on. “Come on X Man, we want to get there before they leave for the day,” Claire said. As quickly as I could, I...
Excusing myself from the ladies for a moment, I went back upstairs to take a shower and shake the ‘Claire-webs’ from my mind. I quickly got dressed and went to BallroomDancer.com, (real!) to see which steps I wanted to add to our various routines and there was a knock on my bedroom door. Rather than my usual ‘come in,’ I asked, “Who is it?” “It’s Claire, Charles ... Annie and my mom said I should come up and talk to you. We need to talk.” “Just a minute — All right?” I was feverishly...
“E-rog-en-ous Zones – look it up. They are places on a woman’s body that, when touched ... or kissed, can produce the female equivalent of your ‘problem,’ at least it makes us feel really good all ‘inside.’” “A young girl like Claire or Kalista doesn’t know they have places on their backs that control specific parts of their anatomy, and can create a lot of sexual feelings, and in your and their cases, sexual frustration. Be Careful, dude,” Sarah finished. “Since this doesn’t sound like...
At that point, Sarah and I had scheduled seven days off to recharge and refresh in Dallas, only three hours away at the Cooper Hotel & Conference Center. The place was awesome. I even scheduled a Swedish Massage for everybody in our group - each in their own rooms, which costs extra, but we’re all worth it. While in Dallas, we went off to Six Flags Over Texas, only thirty minutes away from our hotel. We even got Annie and Sarah to go on some of the rides. The place was pretty cool. While...
Leaning into Kal, I said, “I think you can do this better than Claire could, but you know I can’t tell Claire that and you can’t either, ever! You promise me? Pinkie Swear?” She put out her Pinkie, attaching hers to mine. I heard her say, “Pinkie Swear, Charles.” I looked over and saw a delicious smile on Claire’s face as K started to try the cut time tempo. She was hesitating. “Look at me, Princess? This song is called, ‘Hold On’ so you can hold on to me and I know you can do this. Try it...
2nd City Grand Rapids, MI Radisson Hotel Here, we performed at the DeVos Place Convention Center in the DeVos Performance Hall, which seats 2,400 people. Mr. Bublé told me we got in here because Harry Connick Jr cancelled, and we got the date. The irony of that is that the two of them have reasonably similar singing styles as well as they sing a lot of the same old crooners’ tunes. From there, we schlepped to, 3rd City Detroit, MI Holiday Inn Woodhaven 4th City Akron, OH Sheraton Suites...
We all got out of the Spa, changed and had something to eat. Both refrigerators, as well as the chest freezers in the garage were quite full, so we have enough food to last until we leave on tour, maybe even longer. I suppose we could pack some food to go with us? Annie spoke, “Today is July 25th guys, midway between Charles & Claire’s birthdays. In celebration of this, kneel, Claire McArthur and Charles Newman.” Kneel? Claire and I looked at each other, not knowing what was about to...
Having brushed up on all of our routines the past couple of days; we were ready to begin rehearsals for the US Something Special Tour. We made our way to the Battelle North Room at The Performing Arts Center in Columbus and found Mr. Bublé there, along with his twenty-nine-piece orchestra and the Arts Center Staff working together to get ready to rehearse. Michael waved at us, as we came into the room. “So, Charles – did you really create a routine to ALL of my recorded music?” Michael...
Sarah went to her daughter and hugged her, tightly. “Yes, I do,” she said just loud enough for us all to hear. My mother started back up, “Claire, calm down. I believe you, but I need you both to be thinking clearly these next few days ... about only dancing! You may become stars whether you win this competition or not, if David Letterman has his way. He may even ask you to go on his show. I believe it broadcasts from Manhattan. I had better go and talk to Jimmy about this.” “Go ahead and...
I blushed deeply as we started to dance using our classic routine we’d made so long ago, to this—her favorite song. She glowed as we danced close enough together to push the ‘girls’ up and against my chest. I glanced quickly down at them, but I just as quickly, returned to the beautiful face of my future mother-in-law as we danced alone on the dance floor. The music ended as I rolled her out and in, ending with my arms completely surrounding her from behind. The audience had been as...
Even Pam and her cameraman Eloy, from WSYX-TV, were there, along with Dave the DJ and his following. I saw my girls changing into their slippers as I mulled over in my head which dances to perform. I quickly decided on ‘The Only Exception’ a Waltz with Kalista, and our new ‘Encore piece’ ‘Xanadu.’ Out of breath, Pam came up to me and said, “National in two minutes, Charles, please?” “Thank you - two,” I responded. Pam laughed. An energy always pulses through me every time I know we’re...
“I am glad you like it so much, Loverboy. If we move into your grandpa’s home, we better have a spa in the backyard, if not inside somewhere too.” “Yeah, inside—that’s the term your mother was using on me too.” We went out to dinner and got back early enough to work on our new routines some more. First, I got Kalista and we worked all of our numbers, then I got Claire to do the same. Lastly, we did out group numbers and the Claire/Kallie numbers as well. It was after eleven pm by the time...
We all looked at one another and did not understand what she was saying to us. She tried again, “That man who just left here ... is ‘John McArthur,’ not Daniel. It was Daniel who died in June’s arms, all those years ago. John swapped ... all their credentials and took over the life of Daniel, including, being the f-f-father of all of my children.” She was sobbing very hard again. I remarked, “It seems like John and Daniel played the same kinds of tricks on everyone, being twins? Including...
Last year, being thirteen-year-olds meant we danced on Tuesday, but this year (2013) since we both will be tuning 14 in late July, we’re probably moving to Thursday nights. However, we got a letter from Jimmy with the upcoming Cotillion schedule. Things have changed considerably; Monday is now 17/18-year-olds, Tuesday 13/14-year-olds, Wednesday 11/12-year-olds, Thursday 15/16-year-olds, Friday is the 9/10-year-olds, and Saturday at ten am, will be the 7/8-year-olds. This was explained by an...
“MOTHER!” She was on a roll, so Sarah kept going, “Sorry Claire, but the truth is the truth. Most girls your age are getting ready to go to high school and plan to sleep with every boy they meet, until they find the one to bring home to Mom and Dad. You, however—hit the mother lode; he’s cute, he’s smart, he treats you like he’s known you for a dozen years, but it’s been barely over a year and a half, from when you first met.” “I know I didn’t originally understand what was going on with...
“You had me worried there for a minute, Tiger,” she said giving me a new nickname. “I thought I felt your hands moving towards my butt.” “They did ... a little, but I was in control of my hands the whole time, OK Love.” “OK Love,” she repeated quietly. Jimmy told us that during the next week we would likely still be working on the Tango and Cha-Cha. Claire and I only needed to refine our steps and learn a few more. We must keep Jimmy satisfied. ==== It was Saturday night, and Annie and...
“I am in a spa with four very healthy and attractive women; my mother, my girlfriend, my soul mate and my potential mother–in-law. The last thing on my mind is having fun. Wait a second ... that didn’t come out quite right.” “Charles,” Claire said swimming over to me, “Do I make you nervous right now?” “Not n-nervous, Claire. More uh — uhm, well ... uncomfortable,” I lied. Claire started to walk towards me with water dripping off ... everything. “Claire,” said her mother, “Don’t tease...
The next couple of days were something of a haze, with the practices, the new routines and such. Mom repeated that the musical guidelines for time are, to avoid a penalty, between 150 and 210 seconds. “Annie’s Song” was 180 seconds, but a song that goes 223 seconds, like “Footloose” does, might be stretching it just too much. Claire told me that Josiah could trim music from the front or the end of the song to make it fit the 210 maximum. So, I asked her to have him cut the opening eight...
Breaking the mood, Sarah said, “He’s not the greatest dancer ever, but he’s darn close. Thank you for stopping by,” she added, rubbing my back saying, “She’s not too far from the truth, Charles?” I leaned into Sarah and cried for a bit. Fed, showered, and dressed - we showed up early for our second Carnegie Hall Performance, these folks paid $2,500 each to see us, so we really needed to be jazzed and ready. Walking up to Michael, I saw he’d actually put on the T-shirt we got him. “Hey...
“Back to the Countdown, all right?” I hopefully asked. That settled them all down, at least a little. Claire said, “You were at 14, Charles.” “Thanks honey,” I said with a kiss. “Number 14;” 955,000 Sarah “Marilyn Monroe” pose “What’s that mean?” Kalista asked. I said, “There was an actress in the 40s, 50s and early 60s named Marilyn Monroe, Kalista. She exuded sexuality and one of her many famous pictures was with her bent over in a low-cut all-white dress, with her ‘girls’ pushed...
“Let’s get back to the hotel everybody,” Annie said. “Michael, when do we leave for Russia?” “In three days, we fly from here to Novosibirsk, Russia, about 2,950 miles, then on to Moscow, an additional 1,730-mile leg, after that to St. Petersburg, our final Russian stop,” Michael said. “Good, I might just sleep for the next two days Michael,” I said. Claire leaned in close and said, “Not without me, you won’t?” The realization of the previous evening, hit me when I woke up. I had my arms...
When they saw us walk up to their ticket windows, there was a scream from within, and they called their supervisor who gave us all free passes for the day. Ever-present Sarah showed me she had autographing pens with her. First thing we did was to take the Behind the Scenes Tour that showed off their zoological support area, and Jonathan, our guide, made a prideful point of mentioning all of the endangered species they had at their park. After the Tour was over, our guide, Jonathan stayed...
What was that? Did they say we had moved on, or were they telling us to leave the floor? The crowd was stunned and started to applaud very loudly. I guess that meant ... We made it! We waved back to the crowd, and Claire took me by my collar and kissed me in front of everybody there. I knew this was likely to come back on me, but I responded and kissed her back causing the other dancers around us to start applauding as well. We broke up both equally embarrassed, but happy as can be — we...
FIFTEEN YEARS LATER (2032) “Charles?” K said, now 28. “Yes, Princess?” I responded, now 33. “Everybody’s gone, leaving us alone.” “Where did they all go to?” I asked. “Claire, Annie and Sarah with Rose and Michael, along with Ken and his brood, went to check on the newest Charles & Claire Dance Studio in Pittsburgh. On their way back they were going to Columbus for the day, to check on the studio that Brian and Susan, and their family, are in charge of.” “That leaves us all alone,...
Well, again, Tuesday night couldn’t come soon enough for me. This week, Brian’s mother took us to Cotillion getting us there early so Claire and I could confer with Jimmy. We told him about the BBQ and about all the steps we learned. Mr. Bradshaw looked at us flabbergasted and said, “You have learned The Natural Turn Progression? I usually don’t even try to teach that to anyone under fifteen; they ... just can’t grasp it. You two really are something special, you know. Next week, I will be...
We got up, showered and met up with the group for a small and quick breakfast. Sarah got us a room in the hotel to practice in, we went through all of our newly restored routines two additional times letting the girls flash them up a little. We took a cab ride out to Wembley Stadium to check it out. We saw a very large dance floor being setup, it was maybe 80ft across by 100ft deep, easily the biggest we’d seen so far. As fast as they were setting it up, Michael and his merry men were...
That caused Jimmy to smile big as he said, “Now ... Charles & Claire will show us all, the Tango,” starting “Hernando’s Hideaway,” a different version than we had danced to before, but quite lyrical. Claire turned to me and said, “Charles remember, No rise and fall!” What a wonderful dimpled smile was on her face. We proceeded to Tango ourselves into a lather using steps that we know Jimmy wouldn’t be teaching tonight, but when you love to dance ... you do what you do, and what you...
“OK, last subject – turning professional and going on this tour. I am beginning to believe, that we are going to like dancing for people on this tour more than anything else, so I suggest we all turn professional right away, informing the NDCA at the proper time. We go on this US Tour, and maybe even Michaels’ World Tour as well.” “Then we maybe find out about going on the World Dance Council International Tour, or starting our own Tour, something along the lines of ‘The Claire and Special K...
“Ooooohhhhh — That was a joke, Charles? That was my soon to be fourteen-year-old sons’ idea of a joke. Ha-Ha. Hmmm ... you knew I was behind the door, didn’t you? Well, you got me pretty good there, Chuckles. I must admit.” She started laughing with us; so, I guess she was OK, but I am going to start being more careful, generally speaking. RING “Hello, this is Charles Newman, who may I ask is calling?” “This is Kalista McArthur, Mr. Newman. Calling to see how you are doing?” “Kalista. So...
Not having been there for over five years brought back memories. It was an all-new orchestra, with a new conductor, Herbie must have retired or passed on. After getting everyone settled, I walked up and introduced myself and met the new conductor, Harold Watson, better known as Hal. He was aware of who we were and had a large number of our music ready for us. There was no live singer this evening, just a nice meal and dance music. I sat between my wife and my daughter. “Daddy,” Rose said...
The next morning, after working out and coming back to take a shower, I looked at our list of cities we’d gone to so far and determined that we have been to 30% of the total cities, and we’re about eight months into our 24-month long Tour so far, which ... matches up. We’re less than two months from Kalista’s 12th birthday. Our second Anaheim performance was as electric as the first, then we had a day off, then Fullerton for a single, the next day was our ‘Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon...
I chuckled, put the phone down and ran to Mom in the kitchen asking her if Claire could come over in the morning to practice. Of course, she said, “Are you ready to be a proper gentleman this time, young man?” I bowed my head and said, “Yes, ma’am. I have got Claire holding on the phone. Could we get her this time, instead of one of her family having to drop her off, please?” That probably sounded a bit needy. “That was the perfect amount of groveling. Go tell her we will be coming to get...
The performances the next four days in Sydney, were quite outstanding. Kalista was extraordinary, and Claire was at the top of her game as well. I’d begun to go to the gym now and work out every morning. I did look up the latest news on Happy Birthday, finding that only three weeks earlier (On September 22nd) a judge in Los Angeles ruled that none of the companies that have collected royalties over the years, held a valid copyright claim. An attorney for the plaintiffs, Randall Newman (No...
Claire said, “I guess we’ll find out who wins the battle of the chesticles, won’t we, Mom?” Sarah did a shake and said, “In sheer size, dear – there’s no comparison.” They all laughed and snorted. “All right let’s go ... Dammit! The stat site is down, I need to call Ken about this!” “Oh,” Sarah said. “We got a request from Disney to make our posters available in the non-USA Parks. Without running it by anyone, I said to go ahead, but only in Japan. I figured we could find out how...
“Both of our mothers, along with our future stepdaughter, would kill us both if we did something as stupid as that,” she responded. “You’re right Claire, and when you are right – you are right,” I said, first looking over the delicious body of my soon to be wife, then starting another kiss. “I am so horny, and you are so gorgeous – a deadly combination, my dear.” “I am up for a little ‘afternoon delight,’ Charles?” she said grinning at me, reminding me again of that wonderful June evening...
After we got home, I changed into a swimsuit and practically jumped into the spa. Being that everyone else was of a like mind, within a half hour, I was joined by my entire C.A.S.K of ladies. Kalista came up to me and asked, in an alarmingly sexual tone, “Whatcha doin, Loverboy,” and she sat down on my lap, spreading herself out in a leisurely manner. “Well, Special K, you sexy lump of clay, you, I was looking at the final leg of our US SST tour.” I had my laptop on a stool...
“Can we wait and not have sex, until we’re married? Too many kids rush into their first time and end up regretting their decision.” “Absolutely Charles, that’ll make it that much more exciting, when we finally do make love to one another, for the very first time.” Of course, that was exactly when Sarah walked in, knocking and saying, “I want the two of you to know something about love. There’s lust, and it is a very powerful and strong emotion, that can break up friends forever. It can ruin...
“I am so excited,” Annie said. “How do you calm down when you get this excited.” Michael knew, so he walked over to her and gave her a nice kiss, possibly the best kiss they had yet shared. She touched her lips and seemed calmer. “He certainly takes after his father,” Kallie said. “Charles did that to Sarah once, and she was never the same again.” “Five minutes please,” our tech girl announced through my headset. I passed that along to the gang. Turning to my wife, I said, “Ready for...
We all laughed for the next hundred miles or so as we headed towards our, 31st City Salt Lake City One Night SLC Marriott City Center We arrived in Salt Lake City about three am. Sarah had gotten us a large suite with two queens and a rollaway. We’re performing at the Salt Palace the day after tomorrow. We were emotionally drained from the last six hours of things happening, so Kalista got in the rollaway, provided I give her a goodnight kiss, which I did, and I crawled into bed with my...
Eventually, we all changed into rehearsal clothes again. We had less than four full months before we leave on ‘The Next-Generation Tour’, and these routines needed to be automatic. I introduced the third set into our regimen, two weeks later we added set number four. Six weeks later all seven sets were worked into the rotation. Sammi was right — the kids were catching on, smiling as they were barely out of breath after a day’s rehearsal. My daily workout did its job; I was back in the best...
The rest of the day was a blast, the farthest thing from dancing we could do. Occasionally, Sarah grabbed my hand as we walked to the things we wanted to see and accomplish. We’d gotten tired, and let our guide give us a mini-tour, while we stayed in the cart. We weren’t being bothered for autographs that much, but if someone asked, we’d stop and gladly do it. We were all dried out now. I’d seen a place on the Park Map I wanted to go to, so I asked to go to Topper’s Hat Shop. I got a light...
I opened the door to a wonderful scent, thank you Ken, and Claire and I quickly started a load of laundry, then stripped and got naked into our spa. I got a text from K, “Can I spa with U?” I asked Claire and she said ‘Sure’ and I texted K back. She was over in a flash. I was planning on putting on some boxers, but my legs felt so good, I stepped into the spa, naked. K came in already in a suit. “Princess, right now - naked only.” She got in, put Claire between us and stripped herself...
“Kallie?” I said pulling her to where we could talk and not be heard. “Yes dear,” she replied giving me again that smile that radiates love. “I found an ALS Research Center in San Francisco. They are expecting records from your doctor regarding your preliminary diagnosis. I have emailed you their information and would love it if you took care of doing that in the next 24 to 48 hours,” I asked. “It isn’t that important, Charles,” she said. “It is to me, please, Special K, do it for me,...
Things were breaking up and our group quickly surrounded us, as we exchanged hugs and kisses. I looked around and didn’t see Kalista anywhere, at least not until she was in the air, on her way to me and I caught her. I won’t be able to hold her much longer, she has gotten taller and thus, heavier; I certainly wouldn’t say that to her face. She went for the deep kiss, but Annie and Sarah were there in time, to stop it from happening. After signing autographs for over half an hour, Annie...
We laughed all the way down to the kitchen. I pulled the chair out for Claire and we went about our business. I made her a salad and brought it to her, then made us each a cheeseburger and grabbed some chips and took it to the table. Lastly I poured us a couple glasses of water and realized I was the only person moving at all. The ladies seemed perplexed over Claire’s ‘ensemble,’ but nobody actually said anything. Claire looked up and said, “Are Charles and I the only ones having lunch...
Our Three Sports Stadium Performances were not technical sellouts, but they were the loudest frikking amounts of people we ever had, with Dan the Man in his elements. Well, back to the Tour: 40 cities left in California; starting in Oxnard, then Ventura and Santa Barbara for 3, Santa Maria for 2, Bakersfield for 3 (In a new multi-use stadium capable of holding 125,000), followed by Visalia, Clovis, and Fresno for 2, Modesto, Stockton and Sacramento for 3. We were planning an extra two days...
“Yes, a Terrible Tango routine,” I said. “Must find just the right music,” as I started rummaging through our music collection. “What about ‘Hernando’s Hideaway,’ Charles? We have practiced to it a couple of times?” Claire suggested. “No, Claire ... it’s a great song to Tango to, but I want something that works for only you and me ... so nobody else will dare dance to it, after we do.” “Aren’t we getting a little full of ourselves, Charles?” mom asked. “No Mom, the music is important;...
Finally, we went back to dancing. I thought we could now practice the Cha-Cha and the Tango. Those were the dances we were expected to know for Cotillion later. We went back over the four Basic patterns, the New York step, along with both the Spot and Walkaround turns again. I added to that, the Crossover steps, and a really cool derivative step called The Chase. After going through this without music, I looked at their selection. They had the Eliane Elias version of “Oye Como Va;” a perfect...
Disney’s Hollywood Studios was impressive. With twenty attractions to choose from, including Rock ‘n’ Roll Coaster, Star Tours in 3D, The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror, that Annie and Sarah wanted nothing to do with, Toy Story Mania, the newly refurbished Fantasmic, and a 25-minute long Live truncation of ‘Beauty and the Beast,’ with five of the wonderful songs from the movie, including the Oscar winning ‘Be Our Guest’ and ‘Beauty and the Beast.’ We also watched the Indiana Jones Epic Stunt...
She pounced on my slightly diminished erection, enjoying it like a kitty cat that just got a fresh plate of milk. She got me clean and pushed me on my back. She dropped her butt down on my erection, causing her to practically scream bloody murder. I threw her a pillow, as she performed at first a ‘Cowgirl’ then without stopping turned it into a ‘reverse.’ I pulled out and got her on her hands and knees and I plowed right into that beautiful butt of hers, again doing most of the work. Only...
My girls all came up to me wondering exactly what I was going to say. As usual, I said that I didn’t know yet, I’d planned to wing it. The cameraman was getting instructions through his earpiece and I got Claire and Kalista on either side me. He backed up a bit and gave me a 5 – 4 – 3 – 2 – 1. The reporter handed me her mike, and I said, straight into the TV camera in front of me, “Ladies and Gentlemen, and kids of all ages, from the Pacific to the Atlantic. Welcome to the Columbus Mall, in...
We got back to Caesars about twenty-five minutes before things started. The same gentleman we’d spoken to before helped us to our seats. The lights dimmed. As part of her show, she does many of her most popular musical selections, including practically all of her music that we had. After her first couple of songs, she took her microphone and said, “Ladies and gentlemen, last fall I was lucky enough to be part of a very special wedding event. It was at a football stadium in Columbus, Ohio....
“I plan to ask her to marry me at graduation, not to marry me at graduation. I know many teenagers as well as older folks seem to think two or three months is plenty of time to be engaged. I hope to be engaged for two full years so when we turn twenty, that year’s McArthur Family BBQ could become our Wedding Day.” “I know you usually hold it in June, Sarah, but that year it could be the Sunday between my and Claire’s birthday’s in July. Could that be planned? Maybe you can get that dunk tank...
We landed in Fairbanks, Alaska, for the first of four performances in the 49th state. Fans in Fairbanks, Anchorage, and Juneau all loved our Next Generation Tour. Our hop from there to Hawaii was wonderful. Our Tour of Pearl Harbor was amazing. Michael explained it to his ‘girls’, causing all three of them to cry a little. Sammi did the same with Lily. My Great-great grandfather, Richard Noble Newman, was shipped to Pearl Harbor during the late summer of 1941. By the grace of God, he...
The next night’s performance was something of a letdown. Michael Bublé performed flawlessly, but every one of us fumbled something. After saying goodnight to him and getting our money, I called a meeting for when we got back to the hotel to pick up Sammi and her crew. After we all assembled outside our vehicles, I said, “What happened tonight was totally unacceptable! Even I messed up!” That garnered a laugh. “In the entire history of Charles & Claire, that has never happened. I don’t...