Jack and JillChapter 2
- 4 years ago
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It didn't take long to figure out we didn't have enough refrigerator and freezer space for everything we picked up. I called Daddy's cell phone, got voice mail and left a message that we'd be over later to put some stuff in his place. He put a huge double side by side refrigerator in when he remodeled the kitchen and there's a big chest type freezer in the garage.
I worked with June to figure out what the two of us could store while I had Jack make three kinds of dip. We covered them in Saran Wrap and took them, the burgers, chicken and corn and the fresh cream over there.
Wherever Daddy and Wanda took off to, they were still there. There were no surprises at the house, and we were in and out within twenty minutes. I noticed that the refrigerator seemed a lot emptier than it had been while I was living there.
When we got back, Jack and I went over to the house and had a war council with June and Mary.
The first thing June said to me was, "Didn't I tell you that Alex was going to bring drinks for everybody?"
"Oh, Shit. Sorry — I meant shucks."
"I'm sure you did."
Jack chimed in, "We'll keep it in the garage. If we need it, we'll use it. Otherwise we can always return it."
June then said, "Where are you going to put everybody?"
I knew the answer to that one. "You said we could use the back yard."
"So, are you going to have everyone eat off the ground?"
Jack said, "Tables."
His sister said, "Good one, Einstein."
June gave Mary the look before the two of them could get into it with each other.
"I've ordered twelve long folding tables with benches for tomorrow. They'll be here sometime between nine and ten. Alex is also going to bring three sets of sawhorses and full sheets of plywood to keep food over near the barbecues. He won't need that much room for his stuff, so you can set up a buffet for your chips and veggies. People can just grab what they want and take it to their tables. Are you going to make people eat with their fingers?"
I said, "Silverware."
Mom didn't even give Mary a chance. "Plastic. And paper plates and bowls and some trash bags and you'll need bowls for the ice cream. Some plastic table cloths for the tables wouldn't be a bad idea, either. And you know there are some people who are going to want to put their drinks in a cup."
Jack was elected to get the paper and plastic goods this afternoon and make a run for ice first thing in the morning. Alex was coming by at 9 with the drinks, so they could be put on ice for the party at 1.
Once the tables were set up, he'd be off to my father's to get the things we'd already taken over there.
Jack said he wanted to take Sara with him and Mary went in to get her. Sara was fine with it, especially when Jack said it would give them time to talk.
June told Jack where he could get tablecloths and gave him some money. She told him how many of each thing he should get. When I thought the amounts were pretty high, she said that some people would be back and forth for food three or four times and would get clean plates each time. And most of them would dump their silverware before they realized there was ice cream. Any who used cups would use a lot, especially kids.
After Jack and Sara headed out, the three of us teamed up to make the potato salad. Mary and I went upstairs and scrubbed potatoes and put them in tin foil, then we broke up the broccoli and cauliflower, rinsed them and put them on plates. The pieces of carrot and celery got rinsed and went on plates, too, then everything was covered in Saran Wrap and stored in the refrigerator. We decided to hold off on the green salad until the last minute, but washed and cut all the stuff for the shish kebabs. By that time, the beef and prawns had soaked long enough and we put everything on the skewers. Mary almost lost it when I pretended to swallow a whole one. I could probably have come close to doing it for real, but the last thing I wanted was to stick a long nail down my throat. And if I'm going to put raw meat down there, that's not the kind I want.
Jack and Sara came back. She'd talked him into getting some napkins, and he got some big rolls of clear shipping tape so we could make sure the tablecloths stayed put. The place June had sent them for the tablecloths was a party supply store. They had everything we needed there, but it probably would have cost three or four times as much as they did at Costco for the rest of the stuff. Jack did pick up four plastic frames, designed to hold big trash bags. They probably wouldn't last past the party, but they'd do the same job as new trash cans at a fraction of the cost. He picked up a big box of bags at Costco.
Sara looked better when they got back than she had this morning. She took off after helping him put everything in the garage for tomorrow.
"Did you two figure anything out?"
"We're working on it."
"Good enough."
"What are we going to do for dinner tonight?"
"I don't know. I'm wiped out. Maybe your mom has something planned."
"When did you last let the beast out?"
"God, he hasn't been out since we got back."
"I think I'll take him down with me before he hurts himself."
"I'll go with you."
My dog can run down the stairs really fast when he's motivated. He seemed motivated. He watered three bushes on the front lawn before he came running up to me with his tongue hanging out. Jack was busy paying attention to Queenie.
We went into the house and the girls were in the dining room, setting a bunch of places. Jack said, "While I've got all three of you... you need to clean up after your dogs tomorrow morning. The last thing we need is a bunch of people stepping in shit."
I was all set to put on my "please help poor little old me" act when Sara said, "I'll do it. You guys have enough to do without picking up shit."
Both Mary and I thanked her.
Mom came down the hall. "Oh, there you are. I just tried to call you. Jill, your father called a few minutes ago. He and Wanda will be here in about 45 minutes. They're bringing pizza."
Mary said, "From Perlione's?"
"God, Mary. You look like Bozo this afternoon when he was watching us make shish kebab. Don't drool on yourself. And to answer your question, as far as my father's concerned, Perlione's is the only place they make pizza.
Jack said, "Yeah. He thinks Pizza Hut is a character from Star Wars."
Mom laughed but the rest of us just stared at him.
Mom said, "See what happens when you hang out with children, Jackie?"
His survival instinct must have kicked in because he just squeezed my hand and said, "They're good for some things, Mom."
She pretended to look at each of us, then back at Jack. "They? Mary too?"
"Oh, I could tell you stories about Mary."
His sister blurted out, "JAACKEEEIE!"
He kept quiet but that didn't stop June from examining Mary like she was under a microscope. "Maybe it's time you and I had a talk."
Mary said, "Mom, you already...", then turned red and covered her mouth as she ran out of the room.
June just said, "That girl. Even when she first learned to get around, she was always on her knees, trying to put something into her mouth."
I got this picture of a full size Mary crawling around and grabbing... Anyway, if I'd been eating or drinking something, it would have come out of my nose, I laughed so hard. Jack was right there with me. Sara laughed a little but was weird about it. Like she thought she shouldn't be laughing but couldn't help it, trying to stifle it.
Jack and Jill - A Naughty Nursery Rhyme by Lubrican Once upon a time there was a boy named Jack, who had a twin sister named Jill. They lived with their widowed mother in a small cottage at the bottom of a big hill. You may even have heard of them. There was a well known poem that was written about them going up that hill to fetch a pail of water. But what you probably DON'T know is the REST of the story of what happened that day. Jack was a strapping lad, 5'10", wide at the...
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The alarm woke me up and I had to untangle myself from Jack to turn it off. I had just finished putting on my robe when the phone rang. Jack tried to bury himself beneath a pile of blankets and pillows while I answered it. It was Mary, wondering if we were going to karate. I told her we were still on, that we'd just have to make sure to come straight home so we could get going to the playoffs. She hadn't decided if she was going to go early with us or finish some things she was in the...
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I stood up and so did Sara. "Thanks, Jack." She kissed me on the cheek and wrapped her arms around me. We were standing in my new kitchen hugging each other when I heard Jill's voice. "My, my. What have we here?" "Oh, Hi Jill. It's not what you think." "Oh, really? And what do you think I think?" "You probably think this is all innocent and I did something nice and Sara's thanking me. It's really a prelude to going in the bedroom and having mad, passionate sex." "Oh. I...
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We discussed where to go out to eat. Laurie was a little young to appreciate Perlione's or the country club. Jack suggested Home Town Buffet and told Laurie how she take her own plate around and put whatever she wanted to eat on it. That sold her on it and she started hounding everybody, asking "Can we go now?" every couple of minutes or so. Daddy finally got up after twenty minutes of this. "Honey, why don't we meet you over there? We'll take Laurie to the restaurant and get...
I didn't do my cleanup in the gym. Going to school was something I wanted to do; I would have felt I was taking advantage if I didn't. Coach was aware of today being Jill's birthday and I had no qualms in not swinging a mop over the gym floor. And if he didn't want to pay for this week, that was fine. After all, I hadn't done anything to earn any money. When I got home, Mom's Lexus was in the driveway but I didn't see Wanda's car. I opened the door to let Bozo out. Wanda and Jill...
Jack took four pictures that I wouldn't mind framing and hanging in the hallway. The rest were very private; a couple of them would make a porn star blush. Those went on my hard drive in a password protected folder. It took a lot for me to hand the memory card back to Jack without reformatting it. Both of us could get into a lot of trouble if those pictures found their way into the wrong hands. And we all know how easy it would be for them to end up on the Internet. I wanted to say...
"Damn, Mom. I oughta bring you to school for show and tell during sex ed." "Well, there's no reason a girl has to torture herself to bring pleasure to her man. And if she does it right, it will be more pleasurable for him, too." "Well, it seems to be very popular with a lot of people. I read that they spent $25,000 to make Deep Throat and it's brought in over six hundred million." "I'm sure it has. But Linda Lovelace's husband got her to learn how to do that by putting a gun to...
The three of us walked out of the courtroom and into the elevator. We got to the first floor and went to an exit around the corner from the metal detectors. Both Daddy and Arthur had been quiet since we left chambers except when Arthur told us which way to turn. We got to the street and Arthur said. "Where are you parked?" Daddy pointed to the lot across the street at the corner and said, "Over there." "I'm around the block. I'll meet you over there. Eastside,...
Jack pulled into the driveway just as Claude was pulling away. They must not have recognized each other because neither acknowledged the other that I could see. It was pretty chilly out so I closed the door. A minute later I heard Jack trudging up the stairs. I went to the door and opened it. He was on the landing with a big green trashcan at his feet. "I already gave at the curb," I said, pretending to close the door in his face. "That's fine," he shouted through the door. I'll just...
On the way to school, Jill said that she wanted to go furniture shopping on Saturday. I agreed to go out with her to see what was available. I had an idea that furnishing the bedroom, living room and getting a kitchen table as well as all the linens, dishes, silverware and all the other stuff that goes with moving into a new place was going to overtax my meager funds. It had seemed like a fortune when I got my ebay payoff, but I was beginning to realize that with the plans I had for her...
We got to the car and Jack stopped up short. "Did you leave anything inside the car? " he asked. "I don't think so," I said. "Why?" "It looks like someone's been inside it." He walked around the car, checking doors. "They're all locked. But Laurie's seat and her DVD were in there when we got here and they're gone now." "Wait a minute." I got out my phone and pressed 6 to call Daddy. He answered after the first ring. "We're ready to leave for home. You wouldn't happen...
"Give me a couple of minutes to make up a folder for Gina," Jack said. "That's fine. I'll go put on the coffee." I took the plate with the two cinnamon rolls on it and put it on the kitchen table, then started a pot of coffee. I went to the freezer and put the rest of the cinnamon buns on a plate and put them in the microwave, not turning it on yet. Jack came in and sat down at the table, grabbing one of the rolls. The coffee maker went through its dying gurgles and I poured a couple...
At 9:25, I pulled into the parking lot at the junior college. I got out and made my way over to the gate. The guard checked me out, recognized me and waved. I was waving back when Jill ran up to me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and I spun her around as she kissed me. Kind of like Mary Tyler Moore without the hat. Or was that That Girl? "Wow. This is new. Why so affectionate?" "Can I help it if I miss you?" "No, I guess not. I'd rather have you in my arms than have you ignore...
Bozo looked a lot better with the blood washed off. He did have a scratch about an inch and a half long that was a little over a quarter inch wide near the middle, but it wasn't very deep. Of course, he was perfectly willing to lie in my lap and have me hold him. Jack came back after getting rid the bloody washcloth sat down next to me. He reached over and scratched Bozo behind the ear. Bozo half opened his eyes, saw who it was, thumped his tail a couple of times, then closed his eyes. "I...
I went into the kitchen and looked at the message board next to the wall phone. There was a message that Jill called with a phone number from our area code that I wasn't familiar with. I dialed the number and a man answered, "Talk to me." "Uh, I'm trying to reach Jill O'Hara. This is the number I have for her." "This is Dr. O'Hara, her father. Who is this?" "Oh, hi John. It's Jack Hill." "Oh, Jack. Hang on a minute... Jillian, there's an obscene phone call for you." This...
It had only been a day, but it felt strange to be going back to school. Spending a day in the middle of the week with Jack was amazing. I like my sleep, and getting up at 5:30 every school day was going to take some getting used to. But being able to snuggle up to Jack and hold his arm all the way to school would make it worth my while. Over the past couple of months, there had been several turning points in my life. Running into Jack was the first one, of course; the one that started it...
Jack and Charlie looked at me like I'd grown another head when I came out of the bedroom. "What?" Jack said, "Did you just say twat?" "Oh, come on, Jack. Don't tell me you've never heard the word." "I've heard it. I'm just surprised to hear it from you." "Girl talk, Jack. Girl talk." Charlie decided it was time to check in with Mary and Jack needed to finish copying his notes. "I'm going to take Bozo out and then I'll probably spend some time with Laurie." "How are...
Nurse Clipboard must have thought it was safe now. She ran into the makeshift delivery room after John and Mom left and confronted Jill. "We need to do an APGAR score on these children. You're putting the hospital in a terrible position." I heard the clipboard hit the floor and Jill said "Stick your APGAR up your ass, bitch. And clean up that mess." Jill stormed out and was followed shortly by Nurse Clipboard who now had twins in her arms, no way to do anything with her hands and was...
Tuesday morning came around too early. My alarm went off a half hour before I was used to getting up since I had to take Jill to school first. I heard some noise out near the garage but not enough to wake anyone up. I remember when the next door neighbors added a family room to their house. Once the workmen started, there was no way anyone on the street could sleep. It was as if they had every power tool under the sun, and they had to all be on at once. One more reason to appreciate Alex. I...
"Oh, Shit!" Jack said. "Did you call Silverwood?" We were on the way home from the grocery store. "Yeah, I talked to Claude. They all left early today. He said we didn't miss anything." "That's good. I'm sorry. I didn't even think about it till just now." "That's OK. They're my customer so it's my responsibility, not yours." We got home and Bozo must have smelled the chicken because he followed us into the kitchen, his nose in the air. He was quite disappointed when I...
Alex and Jorge finished up going through three plates of pancakes and a couple of cups of coffee. Jorge got into the blueberry syrup, he'd never had it before. I was done and went out to see what they were up to. Alex had a long handled squeegee that he used on the floor. It wasn't dry but it wasn't flooded, either. In the meantime, Jorge opened up a long roll of plastic on the front lawn. He went up the stairs to the second floor, got up on a ladder in the middle and measured from the...
I untangled my shirt from the waistband and worked my skirt down, tossing it in the hamper. After taking off the shirt, I used it dab between my legs to clean what hadn't already dripped out. I threw it at Jack, who caught it one-handed. "You can clean up the carpet while I take a shower." Jack and I have this battle going on about whose mess it is. I say since he made it, it's his. He claims it's a gift to me and if I choose to drip it out, it's my problem. So far, neither of us has...
Laurie and Posie were chasing butterflies on the front lawn when we drove up. It looked like the butterflies were winning but neither of them seemed to care. Posie was still working on that running thing, tripping over herself whenever she tried to go too fast. Mary was sitting with her back against the wall, reading a textbook. As soon as we pulled up to the curb, Laurie started running toward me, Posie right behind her. Mary put her book down and made her way to Charlie, though not quite...
We got Myra cleaned up and she started to leave. Laurie asked where Annette was and she told her the kids were down in the car. That meant getting a sweater on Laurie and going down to the car so she could say hello to her friend. Billy seemed happy to see me and Bozo. Yes, Bozo had to go down, too. And Posie. When we got back upstairs, Daddy and Mom were still talking at the kitchen table. I got the pot of coffee and topped everyone off. Again, I got the 'can't believe this coffee'...
Telling Jill I'd sleep anywhere as long as she was with me was obviously the right thing to say. She held on to my arm and pulled close, a little sigh escaping her lips. I relaxed and was almost asleep when she spoke. "Jack?" Oh boy. Now what. "Hmmm?" "Do you remember this morning? In the car?" "Uh Huh. What about it?" "I told you I'd make it up to you for being there last night. I owe you, Jack." Her right arm untangled itself from mine and I felt her hand snake under my...
You have to have warm dinner rolls with lots of butter when you eat beef stew. If it's not the law, it should be. We'd stopped at Vons and picked up a tube of the things. I tossed them to Mary when we walked into the house. Sara look kind of wary when she saw the Tupperware. "What is it?" "It's beef stew." "It's not going to be like yesterday's, is it?" "Nah. This smelled pretty good. And Jill made sure she didn't screw up." "All right, then." Jill emptied the stew into...
Bozo spent the night in the garage with us. He stayed over near the water heater. Mom had told Jill to take responsibility for what she was doing to me while we were doing our chores earlier. Jill had promised to make it better. She did. I'd planned on talking to her about what she and Mary talked about while they were washing Mom's new car. That idea went out the window. Jill wouldn't let me put shorts on and she was naked when I turned out the main light. We got into bed and the next...
Laurie's action confused me. Did she think of me as just another DVD on the pile, another person to come into her life for a while and then leave? I wanted to tell her that I would always be around, that she could count on me, but I knew it wasn't true. My life was getting busier and busier every day and I just didn't have the time to spend with her like I was today. Less than a year from now, there was a good chance Jack and I would be gone, off to a college in some city far away. Would...
The alarm went off at 6:00. I got up and Jill moaned. Bozo came over to me and made himself known. I'd totally forgotten he was in the garage with us. He really was a pretty good dog. I opened the side door and saw that the outside lights were still on. Bozo ran out to squat as I flipped the switch. Jill came up behind me, put her hand on my shoulder and gave me a quick kiss. "See you inside. Gotta pee." I saw her open the kitchen door, step up with one foot, then screech "Daddy!" I...
We all sat down to dinner. I was glad we'd taken that walk. Mom had roast beef with mashed potatoes and gravy and asparagus covered in sour cream. "So how was your big date." "It was fine, Mary." "Did you get any?" "Mary, I don't want to hear talk like that. It's Jackie's business whether he got any or not. How would you like it if he asked you if you put out when you start dating?" My father's name was Jack Raymond Hill. When I was born, they named me Jack Royce Hill. So...
I gave them time to get home, then called John on his cell phone. "Talk to me." "Hi, John. It's Jack." "Hang on, I'll get her." "Wait a minute. I need to talk to you. I need your OK before I buy her something." "Jack, I said I wasn't ready for that..." It was after dinner. The only reason we were getting into this was that I needed to borrow her car to make it work. "Jack, I think it's too soon. Look at you, you were ready to give up on girls last week. You just gave...
Jack got home a little after five thirty. When he kissed me and asked "How was your day?" I felt like Donna Reed. Pretty good. I could get used to this. After we swapped some spit, I asked, "Did you shower after practice?" "Yes, Ma'am." He turned his head and pulled the top of his ear down. "See?" "Good Boy. Now you need to take Bozo out and let him do his business for about five minutes. And when you come back, I need you to lock the front door. Then let me know you're back,...
My body tried to jump up but something was holding my right arm down. I came up to consciousness and saw that it was Jill. She moved a bit and moaned. The banging that had awakened me started up again. "Amuhmfamfh" was as about as coherent as I could be this soon after waking. "Jack. Jill. Come on, breakfast. Mom wants to talk to us." I was able to get out a fairly understandable "In a minute, Mary." I reached over to get my underpants but they felt stiff. "I used them to clean...
Daddy had his eyes closed and was conducting Beethoven's Fifth Symphony as I came up to the car. It was easy to tell because he was at the da da da daaaah part. He turned toward me as I opened the door. His face looked relaxed and he smiled at me silently, leaned forward, turned the key and started the engine. We eased out of the parking lot towards home. He listened to the CD for a while, then lowered the volume. "How did it go?" "Real good. I think Myra's going to come work for us....