And The Horse You Rode In On
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The following day was the first day back at school for the second half of the autumn term. I was, for once, actually glad to be back at school. Even if it was a double period of General Studies first thing. Ugh! And games last thing. Double ugh.
I was very disappointed when Mrs Clarke wasn’t in maths. As were a number of the others. Particularly the males. To my slight surprise, and worry, Bondy wasn’t in either. I did start to wonder whether he’d been collected, and taken Mrs Clarke with him. But that didn’t make a lot of sense because Talulah had been in GS that morning and I didn’t think Mrs Clarke would just abandon her.
Talulah and Sandra, along with Higgis and Blish joined me for lunch. Higgis had been in maths, and Blish was in my form group, so in the same GS as Talulah and myself. We speculated idly about both Bondy and Mrs Clarke being absent, but came to no sensible conclusions.
“What do you folks do in games?” Blish asked.
“Rugby,” I grumbled. “I’d far rather do cross-country or swimming.”
“I wish I was doing rugby,” Blish said. “I’m doing hockey and I’ve been hit in the face already by a hockey ball.”
“And nearly in the balls by a hockey stick,” laughed Higgis.
“You doing hockey as well then?” I asked him.
He nodded. “Love it. No good at it.”
We all chuckled.
Both Sandra and Talulah were doing netball and both were perfectly happy.
“Anybody know what Bondy does?” I enquired. “It’s not rugby.”
“Footy,” Talulah said. “He’s actually quite good at it and he’s got into the school second team. He found out just before the hols.”
“Ah nice. I don’t actually like football. Can’t even stand watching it, but I’d rather play that than Rugby.”
“You hate rugby as well?”
I shook my head. “I love watching it. As long as it’s union, not league. But don’t want to play it.”
I found out then that Higgis and his family were from Yorkshire. “Nah,” he said. “League’s far better. More running. Less stoppages,”
“Except,” I butted in, “for those silly restarts every six seconds. You know, the ones after those mock tackles.” I grinned at him. “That’s just plain boring. Silly little scrums with what, just three players? Nah. You need a full eight-man scrum plus line outs, rucks and mauls to make it more interesting. League is more like tag rugby.”
The pair of us argued for about fifteen minutes, all, well mostly, in good humour, about the relative merits of the two versions of rugby. Union was the older code, and had initially been entirely amateur. League had been a fully professional game right from the start, but it had mostly been limited to Lancashire and Yorkshire. Over time some of the union players had defected to league, attracted by the salaries. Anyone who transferred to league, was instantly banned forever from playing union, but with the serious amounts of money floating around, and something which the press called shamateurism, in the mid 1990’s the international board decided to make union an open game. In other words, they allowed professionals.
The two games were actually very different, and it was not very common for players to transfer between the codes. I preferred watching Rugby Union, the fifteen-man game, but I could certainly see the attraction in the thirteen-man Rugby League game. It just wasn’t as interesting to me. Higgis thought differently.
We were actually playing rugby sevens, which was a seven-a-side version of the fifteen-man game. To my amusement Higgis actually thought it a brilliant game. “Even if it is based on Union it has more akin to League. And you do know,” he added slightly pompously, “that American football is based on Rugby League. Their ten yards in four downs bit is very loosely based on our six plays.”
I was actually under the impression American football was a bit older than that, and more based on a modified version of Rugby Union, and that League had got their ideas from that. I told him this and our friendly discussion once again evolved into an only marginally less friendly argument.
“Rugby for wimps,” Blish muttered into Sandra’s ear, referring to American football.
We all heard and laughed. “Yeah. They need to wear battle armour,” Sandra whispered through her laughter. “At least we don’t.”
“That’s because they cheat. They’re allowed to tackle a man without the ball.” That was a definite no-no in both rugby codes. This comparison was a lot hampered simply by the fact that none of us knew a great deal about the American game. Despite this however, we all decided that rugby, in whatever form, was far superior.
Lunch break was over shortly afterwards, and Blish and I headed off to physics, while the others went to whatever they were doing next. “Have you heard from Bondy?”
Blish shook his head and joined the group of students he normally sat and worked with. I joined my group and we chatted about the holidays while we waited for the teacher.
Bondy was in school the following morning, with his left hand in a cast. We all crowded around him before first class to find out what he had done, but at one point, when he had accidentally got shoved and cried out in pain, Talulah, who had been standing next to him, turned on everyone.
“Piss off the lot of you,” she said angrily. “You’ll all find out when he’s good and ready to tell you.” She saw me and grabbed my arm. “You stay.”
The crowd did disperse, no one wanted to be on the wrong side of Talulah, and soon it was just Talulah and Sandra, Bondy and myself. Even Blish and Higgis had vanished, though I was sure I had seen Blish in the crowd.
“So go on, give us the official version, and we’ll make sure that’s what gets around,” Talulah said imperiously. There was an impish glint of humour in her eyes.
“There is no ‘official’ version,” Bondy gasped, still a little grey from the pain of the shoving.
“You should go home,” Sandra told him, her eyes narrowing as she frowned at him, looking intently at him.
“I can’t. I have to be here today, or in hospital. Things happening at home. I might stay home tomorrow if I can.”
“Have you got any pain killers?”
“I’ve got co-codamol, but I’ve already had one dose today so I can’t have any more until lunch time.”
“What lessons do you have today?”
“He’s in phys prac with me now,” I told them.
“After that?” Sandra asked.
“Er. Double German after break,” Bondy told us, “then after lunch French, PE and maths.” I remembered now. Bondy had a mostly similar timetable as me, just substituting German for tech drawing, and French for chemistry. We had the same PE, general studies, maths and physics.
“So what happened?” I asked.
“I was riding pillion on Dad’s motor bike. Some arse came out of a side road and almost took us out, but in the process Dad had to swerve. I fell off because I wasn’t ready for it. I landed on the bonnet of the other car and tore a tendon in my wrist when I fell off.”
“Oh shit. Your dad okay?”
“The bike never got touched, and if I hadn’t come off I suspect the car driver wouldn’t have even realised he’d nearly hit us.”
“When was this?”
“Sunday evening, I didn’t get out of hospital until four Monday morning and Mum and Dad both said I could stay home yesterday.”
“Don’t blame you mate. What’s happening to the car driver?”
“He’s claiming it’s all Dad’s fault because he never touched us and only his car got damaged.”
“But if he pulled out of a side street and caused your dad to have to swerve, then surely it’s his fault?”
“Yeah, but he reckons that’s not what happened, and his passengers back him up.”
“What are they saying?”
“Not sure exactly, but they are saying it’s all our fault, and if we don’t pay up they’ll come and sort us out.”
“Did the police get involved?” asked Talulah.
“They should have been called because I was hurt, but when Dad tried to call them they just threatened us.”
“Shit, so what happened then?”
“Well someone else called an ambulance, and I suspect the ambulance service notified the police because it was an RTI.”
“RTI?” asked Sandra.
“Road Traffic Incident,” Bondy told her.
We all nodded. “So the police did turn up?”
“Yeah. Eventually. After the ambulance. The car driver and his mates were threatening the paramedics as well, but Dad still manages to look fairly fierce when he’s in his leathers and helmet, so he, sort of, kept them from doing something too stupid. When the police finally did show up most of the car passengers made themselves scarce.”
“Probably wanted by the police,” I said.
Bondy just nodded, but said nothing.
Although it was a physics practical lesson first, and a double lesson at that, Bondy had no problems as he was right-handed and it was his left hand in plaster. We did no practical that day, just theory, so sitting and listening and writing as the teacher gave out information.
The four of us met up again at lunch time. I couldn’t help looking at Sandra as she fussed a little around Bondy, making sure he was okay and got his food. That’s when I noticed just how pretty she really was. She wasn’t as pretty as Talulah was, I suppose, but then Talulah was, to a certain extent, brash about her looks, and extremely outgoing. Sandra on the other hand was far more introverted, had a much more understated beauty. One that, now I looked, I realised was, in its own way, at least as beautiful as Talulah. I genuinely wondered how many people had noticed. By staying in Talulah’s shadow so much, plus with her dark goth makeup and spiky hair, people rarely actually looked at her. Her makeup and dress-style hid some of her beauty. Now I was looking, and I saw and was quietly impressed.
Mrs Clarke wasn’t seen all week, and the rumours and myths did the rounds. We all knew about the Confederacy collections, and everyone assumed she had been taken. On Thursday however, the teacher taking us for maths first thing told us Mrs Clarke would be back in on the following Monday. Naturally the rumours all changed, but still, amongst the boys at least, some of those rumours were well into the gutter.
I had worn a different pair of knickers every night, plus during the day on Wednesday and Friday, the only days I didn’t do either games or PE. By Wednesday lunchtime I had to take that pair off and go commando for the rest of the day. From that day on, if I was to be going out wearing a ‘new’ pair of knickers I wasn’t sure about, I made sure that I could actually wear it without pain first.
I hated going home each evening. I couldn’t tell anyone about my home life: I was under eighteen and I suspected I would be ‘taken into care’ if the social services found out. Dumped with some foster parent? Not a chance. I wanted to stay in my own home. But I missed my parents. I slept in Mum and Dad’s bed Thursday night, but their scent had mostly gone by now. I missed them dreadfully.
At lunch on Friday I was sitting next to Sandra. Bondy hadn’t been in Wednesday or Thursday so it had been just the two girls, Blish and Higgis, and myself. Come Friday however, Bondy was back, still in plaster, but looking far more normal. I was chatting with Sandra as Bondy was chatting with Talulah. Blish and Higgis were not with us.
“Will you go out with me tomorrow?” I asked her softly.
She looked at me in surprise for a moment, then her face softened. She gave me a small smile that just lit up her face and took my breath away. “Maybe.”
“But,” I started.
“I’ll tell you at afternoon break,” she said softly.
“Thank you,” I whispered.
“I haven’t said yes yet.”
“But you also didn’t say no straight away. That alone is worth a thank you.”
Her smile got a little wider. “I like you,” she said. “You and Bondy have been really good for Tee.” Amongst her very closest friends, Talulah was known as Tee.
“Thank you,” I said. “She needed to know she’s, erm, well, safe? I’m glad she’s had you as a friend anyway.”
“I don’t really know how to help her, I just muddled through.”
“I think you did everything exactly right. You stayed her close friend. You stayed a true friend. You did tell Mrs Clarke, and she’s trying to put plans in motion to save both her and her sister.” I shrugged. “You accepted us. We got to show her, I hope, that most males are not monsters.”
Sandra’s smile went a bit sad. Oh shit, I thought. I frowned. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah. I’m okay.” She looked at me intently for a few moments. “Yeah, alright, I’ll go out with you.”
I grinned in delight. “Thank you. Shall I come and pick you up? I don’t drive or anything.”
She shook her head. “It’d be better if I meet you in town somewhere.”
“Where’s best for you?”
She grinned. “Where do you want to take me?”
I shrugged. “I don’t really know. Is there anything on at the pics you fancy?”
She shook her head. “Not going to the cinema,” she said flatly. “There’s an art gallery just around the corner from there that I love going into.”
I nodded. I knew of it but I’d never been in. “Okay. What time?”
“Two?”
“Sure.” I smiled at her. “Thank you.”
The really bizarre thing was that I had not planned on asking her out, it had just happened. Now it had I was happier than I had been for a little while. I put my hand out to take hers but she gave a tiny shake of the head and pulled her hand away. “Not now,” she whispered.
“Oh, okay.”
Friday afternoon was one of the harder times of the week, with chemistry, then maths and finally physics. Yet even this couldn’t totally dampen my happiness.
I was up reasonably early on Saturday morning. The first thing I did, after showering and dressing - a pair of Pauline Lipp’s knickers, was to quickly get a wash load on. Mum normally did two during the week, and two at weekends, plus sometimes another odd one or two depending on what was happening. I hadn’t done any during the week, so I was still a long way behind on the clothes that should be going to charity, as well as on my own stuff.
I met Sandra and we had a lovely afternoon together. She was nowhere near as heavily made up as she usually was at school, and looked totally different. Even her clothes were toned down somewhat. She was wearing trainers and jeans instead of the boots, skirts and sometimes leggings she normally wore. It really softened her down and made her look so much more feminine. Yet I still liked how she dressed and made herself up for school. It was a lovely contrast. After wandering around the art gallery for about an hour, we left and went and sat in a local coffee bar. Not one of the big chains. “My parents think I’m with a couple of girlfriends,” Sandra told me as we sat down with a couple of americano’s. “They won’t let me go out with a boy at the moment.”
“Why?”
She shrugged. “Various reasons I guess. Boys taking advantage. You know.”
I didn’t really ‘know’ but I did sort of understand. “Okay.”
“What do your parents think you’re doing?”
I looked down at the table and wondered what they were doing. “Dunno,” I said shrugging. “I didn’t tell them I was going out and meeting someone.”
“They think you’re on your own?”
“Haven’t told them anything. They don’t know where I am. Doubt they’re even thinking about me.” I didn’t know that, though I suspected both my parents were thinking about me, and worrying somewhat, but not often and only when they got the chance.
“That’s not good. You should tell them.”
“I know. I will if I get the chance.” I tried to change the subject. “Do you and Talulah manage to go out much?”
Sandra smiled slightly, acknowledging my change of subject. “Sometimes, and only after her dad has checked with mine that there are no boys involved.”
“Your dad isn’t.” I started, but Sandra interrupted me before I had got very far.
“God no. Nothing like that. My dad’s really nice. And my mum. No they’re just worried for me after something happened to my older sister.”
I hadn’t even realised she had an older sister. “Oh?”
Sandra just shook her head, a look of infinite sadness on her face.
“Was she raped or something?” I asked very softly.
Sandra shook her head and looked down at the table. I took her hand. “I’m sorry,” I said. “Forget I asked. It’s none of my business.”
Sandra looked up. “Georgie was being bullied at school because she was a real swot. She was clever, but she wasn’t really good looking. Not like Tee.”
“Or you,” I whispered.
She ignored me. “Because of that she didn’t have many friends. Some of the boys were really cruel to her. I mean really cruel. Said she was ugly. She committed suicide when she was fourteen.”
“Oh hell fire,” I whispered softly. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have asked. How old were you?”
“I was eleven and I loved her. I really looked up to her. She was so good, so lovely. So clever.”
“Oh no. Does anyone else know?”
Sandra shrugged. “It’s not a real secret. Most people at school know.”
“I didn’t. I’m sure Bondy doesn’t.”
“Tee does.”
“But you have to be strong for her. Who’s strong for you?”
“Tee helps me at least as much as I help her.”
“Let me be strong for you,” I said softly, still holding her hand. She looked up at me, studying me. We were sitting on opposite sides of the table but she suddenly moved round next to me and hugged me.
“Thank you.” She looked around, then at her watch. “Come on, let’s go for a walk.”
It was early November with bonfire night a couple of days away. Most people would have theirs tonight, but for once I wouldn’t. It was sunny but cold and we held hands as we wandered slowly up the high street. We didn’t talk much; I just enjoyed being in her company.
We eventually made our way back to the bus station and went into the attached coffee shop to wait for our respective buses. It wasn’t as nice as the first one we had been in.
“Thank you for a lovely day,” I told her.
“No, thank you,” she said, and gave me another hug. To my surprise she even gave me a kiss on the cheek. I smiled softly and picked up her hand and kissed it. She blushed a little.
“Are you free tomorrow?”
She looked surprised. “Are you sure?”
“I’ve never been more sure of anything.”
Her surprise turned to pleasure and happiness, but that quickly changed to regret.
“I can’t. I’m doing family stuff with my parents tomorrow.”
“Okay,” I said, very disappointed.
“I want to come out with you more than anything, but,” she shrugged.
I nodded. “I know. I’ll see you Monday anyway.” I paused. “Do you have a mobile?”
She nodded and rattled off the number. I laughed and took my phone out of my pocket. She took it off me and quickly typed in her number. Her own phone rang moments later. “Now I have your number as well. Text me first though. Especially if you know, or think, I might be with my mum or dad.”
I nodded. “No worries. Except when we’re at school, you can text me anytime.”
“Won’t your parents mind?”
“I don’t know. They might if we’re all sitting down to a meal, but when that happens, I’ll just ignore you until I can respond later.” I hadn’t told a lie. Not directly. I just didn’t want to tell her I was on my own at home.
She nodded then looked up as another bus swept into the small area. “This is mine.”
“That’s mine right behind yours,” I said as a second bus came in, slightly slower.
She laughed and reached up and gave me a peck on the lips. I was shocked, but her soft lips on mine, even for that fraction of a second, had felt wonderful.
When I got home there was a strange car parked on the drive. I didn’t recognise it and approached slowly.
The door opened and I started to back away, until I saw it was Mrs Clarke.
“Toby” she said, relief very evident in her face. “Where’ve you been? I’m so sorry. I didn’t find out until this morning.”
“What?”
“Invite me in. Please?”
“Uh. Sure.” I unlocked the door and took her straight into the living room. The dining room had a pile of knickers in while I hadn’t done any washing up this week so the kitchen was a mess also. The living room however I had kept spotlessly tidy. It had just seemed the right thing to do.”
“I’m sorry, my parents,”
She interrupted me. “It’s okay Toby. I know what’s happened to your parents and to your sister. Your father phoned me, but I wasn’t home so he left a message on my answerphone.” She looked sad. What was it with sad women at the moment. My three favourite women on Earth, Talulah, Sandra and now Mrs Clarke were all sad.
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