Miracle
4 years ago
As the sun shined on my face I slowly woke up from my sweet dreams. Suddenly, I heard someone knocking on the door. I forgot to close the door last night, so the person could walk right in. It was Michael, one of my best friends. ‘Liz, get up, you’re late again. You know the professor will kill you if you get late ag…’, Michael stopped in mid-sentence, only now realizing I wasn’t alone and we were naked. ‘Uhmm…nevermind. I’ll see you later.’ He turned around, noticeably ashamed. I woke up...
3 years ago
The wet slap of the water hitting concrete echoes through the space. Anna's been sitting here for God knows how long in the bleachers around the 50 metre pool, semi-hidden behind a cement column. Her oil pastels are scattered, any pretense of working on her art folio abandoned. She can't stop watching him. Watching Rhys. She started coming here in winter, when the school swimming season was well and truly over. She'd bring an A3 sketchbook and work from memory, drawing birds,friends, still...
First Time
2 years ago
Amazon - Part 8: CHARM SCHOOL Week 4 By Itinerant Edited by Amelia R Biographer's Note: This is Nicole's story. It covers those events and people she finds notable in her life and chooses to share. If you have problems with it, take it up with her. I'm just a glorified stenographer. *** Monday, January 29, 2001 Somerley It was amazing! After all the clich?s about foggy, rainy England, she was here during *lovely* weather. Not warm by any means, but sunny and dry nonetheless. N...
4 years ago
The man bowed again. ‘Princess, I am Calico, Knight of Avalon, taken from my home without my leave. I find myself in a strange world where people are about to kill me to get to you. Might I ask you a question?’ ‘Yes, good knight, you may indeed ask your question.’ ‘What is your name?’ This was said with an exaggerated tone and a big smile. She grinned, despite herself. ‘I am Selene, Daughter of Queen Mariah and King Brion. And heir to the realm of Sulleigh.’ Calico bowed to her and turned...
4 years ago
I don’t know who first came up with the notion that a groom shouldn’t see his bride-to-be the night before the wedding, but it was a bloody stupid idea. It’s a nerve-racking experience knowing that in just a few short hours you’ll be dedicating your entire future to someone else. What if you’re not worthy - or worse, what if they’re not? It’s enough to keep a man awake the night before the biggest day of his life, worrying. But still, my fiancée insisted on following tradition. “It won’t...
Cuckold
3 years ago
"Signor Giuli mi dispiace ma questi sono i fatti" - ero nel mio studio e stavo mettendo al corrente un mio cliente degli ultimi aggiornamenti sul suo caso: tre mesi fa la figlia era stata rapita durante una crociera nel mediterraneo la polizia non ha mai trovato niente, allora si era rivolto alla mia agenzia, mio marito aveva lavorato diverse volte per la sua società e quando lo informai che mio marito era rimasto ucciso ed io avevo preso il suo posto nell'agenzia era rimasto sorpreso ma mi...
Group Sex
3 years ago
Introduction: I apologize for taking so long to post this, I barely finished it last night. Ive been busy with a paper that I have due in a few days but its now done. So my next paper isnt due for another three weeks so my parts will come a lot faster, thanks you for waiting patiently, enjoy(: Bailey felt like a whole new person, she really did. She had new clothes, a few pairs of new shoes and she just got a hair cut. She now had bangs and a short bob, her hair barely passing her jaw line. She...
4 years ago
In the office on Friday, Mona had the usual wad of 'While You Were Out' slips and a wad of paper. "What's that?" I asked. "A billet doux from your favourite staff member. And Chaz', I guess." "Mt. Watkins?" "Got it in one! He was unhappy about your decision to support Chaz. So this is our copy of his protest to Canberra." "Do I need to worry about it?" "I wouldn't think so." "Chaz?" "No. I think he's safe, too. But there's something in his cover letter that Kevin...
3 years ago
“I’ve finally gotten you alone for a minute, Jennifer!” Gretchen cheered as she stepped into Jennifer’s office and closed the door slightly. Pulling a chair up next to Jennifer on her side of the desk, Gretchen could hardly contain herself. “So… tell me EVERYTHING.” Gretchen anxiously waited for a response from her coworker.Jennifer’s eyes bulged, shocked at the sudden intrusion into her office. She had been trying to finish up her last-minute changes to her presentation for the staff meeting....
Novels
3 years ago
Introduction: Some boyhood adventures, cont. (Note: Like pt.1 Revised, this is a re-post, with a few changes, so sorry if you have already read it. It published without themes and other stuff so, so only way to fix it was to delete and repeat. Also, I did some editing, so its a bit different) In part one I told a bit about my early years in a small, country town. This picks up my story. Ill tell next how I did finally learn about jacking off, or I should say, about having my first orgasm,...
3 years ago
John stretched as he got out of the car. It had been a long drive from Tallahassee. Fortunately, he had taken two days to make the drive to Louisville, instead of trying to make it in one day. His parents were also coming up to his cousin Walter's wedding, but they had flown up, instead of drying. He pulled out his phone and dialed, "Mom?" "Yes, honey?" "I made it," he replied. "Excellent. Just check-in at the hotel desk, although the rooms have already been paid for." "OK, see you in a few...
Incest
1 year ago
After much anticipation of shooting together Naomi and I have our first encounter that was without a doubt intense. We instantly crave each other’s skin, we kiss, and my hand goes around her throat as I touch her body. I continue with fingering her and then laying down where I kiss and lick her pussy and asshole. We have nearly unbroken eye contact as we have sex all over the bed. I use a Hitachi on her as she cums on my cock multiple times. Naomi is passionate and giving, her mouth...
xmoviesforyou
3 years ago
I wasn't exactly sure what kind of building Ariana was bringing me into. It wasn't dirty or dangerous or anything like that, but it wasn't an apartment building either. It seemed like a collection of business suites. She had asked me to be quiet so I didn't want to ask her until we were behind closed doors. When she lead me into the room, it made more sense. The space was small and softly lit, very warm and cozy, with music playing and a padded table in the middle. Very small. She had clearly...
4 years ago
After Jessie’s and Jill’s request to be more open with the family I began to notice a few chances around the farm. I noticed how lightly the girls had begun to dress. They would walk around the house in light clothing which revealed a lot of their beautiful skin. Obviously trying to catch my attention, I think it excited them to prance around the house trying to impress a boy, and it certainly excited me! Those occasions usually turned out to them unzipping my pants and playing with me. They...
4 years ago
"Jewelry, my dear, jewelry!"Hold my fingers two incles apart, "This is six inches!""No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you are thinking!"Who the hell runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?The group at the table started cracking up at every line. They were so loud some of the other patrons were complaining to the management. The servers tried to quiet them down, but in moments another line would be tossed out and their laughter would go wild again."No, we ride the camels to town to meet...
Humor
3 years ago
WRITER'S NOTE: THIS IS MY FIRST STORY. ANYONE IS WELCOME TO ADD TO THE STORY, OR TO CREATE ALTERNATE CHAPTERS. I WELCOME ANY CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM, ADVICE, OR WRITING TIPS. THANK YOU, AND I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOURSELF. The day started normally for 18 year old student, Sarah. She had woken up, showered, gotten dressed and gone to school. Her first class was math with Miss Swafford. Sarah was often called teacher's pet by her peers due to her willingness to always assist Miss Swafford with...
Lesbian
1 year ago
Ooohhh So Lovely! A bomb bitch who choose the best mothafucking stage name in the history of smut! No man watches Osa Lovely and then struggles to remember her name the next time he feels the urge! One look at her fiery curves and the unique name stays etched in your brain forever, and today I am privileged to check out Osa's official Twitter page! Twitter.com/osalovely is an account that proves that Twitter is way more than a bunch of old maids bashing dudes and small-dicked nerds who hate...
Twitter Porn Accounts
3 years ago
My friend Breanna is one of the best people I’ve ever known. She is truly a wonderful soul. Her energy is infectious and she just makes everyone around her happy. I met Breanna in college. We were both on the tennis team and we have been friends from the second we met. Although I am basically into guys, I am a “wee bit” bi sexual. My two soulmates, Shannon and Jessie, have been with me through every moment of my life. Encouraging me, helping me, giving me tough love and also making love. We...
4 years ago
How It All BeganI retuned home early from work than my husband expected I thought id surprise him, I opened the front door and strangely he wasn’t downstairs so I headed up stairs, when I got nearer the top I heard a bitch moaning loudly, Oh fuck, oh fuck yeah, yeah baby she cried, what the fuck I thought as I stood in the door way there was my husband fucking some big titty rock bird doggy style, I stood at the doorway in rage, I was shaking with anger seeing my husband cheating with some...
3 years ago
This happened a few years back.....When to Tony's parents place with him to check up on his sister while they parents is away on Holiday. Now Tony's sister Anna is 18 but she has always been the princess type that have no clue of how to cook, do laundry but she have one hot body... She is about 160cm tall with a slim athlete body and an ass to die for, bleach blond hair and b cup tits. Since I have became friend with Tony I have always dream of fucking his little sister. When we arrive at his...
4 years ago
Sherri and I quickly settled at John’s house. She and I even gave it that woman’s charm it needed. We decorated those empty walls of his as well as got some kitchen stuff as all he had was a can opener, a couple of pots and one frying pan. When you are a male living, alone I guess that was all you needed. Around midweek or so Sherri had told me that John was taking her and her friends skating Friday night. I asked John if that meant I got a woman’s night out with Cathy. John told me that...
3 years ago
Since I snuck into my neighbor Mr. Chapman’s backyard and got caught naked in his pool, my life had been a roller coaster of experiences. Who knew meeting my hunky black neighbor would turn into a sexual Renaissance for me? Not that I’m complaining, it just caught me by surprise. Now that we had forged an actual relationship, one that we officially upgraded to labeling, I wanted to do something special for him.One could argue that letting my two best friends tend to his insatiable cock a few...
4 years ago
Toby and Hanna met each other at a industry convention some 3 years back and simultaneously felt a desire for each other. Looking back you might find it strange that they didn`t hook up at the very moment they met. Civility had the better of them; "smile and talk, dirty thoughts to yourself". One hint lead to the other, another invitation led to the bed. During these last three years sex has been far from boring. Being in the sub 30`s Toby and Hannah had no complications whatsoever when it came...
Group Sex
3 years ago
“Cameron…” I felt it more than I heard it, my name a chill whisper in the dark that raced up my spine. I sat up, heart hammering in my throat. The sound, or whatever it was, had woken me from a deep middle of the night sleep. I looked around my room, wondering if one of my drunk frat brothers had somehow wandered in. All I saw was darkness and silence. No movement. Nothing. The room was empty except for me. Of course it was. I felt like a total idiot. No more watching Paranormal State...
Gay Male
4 years ago
As I put my lipstick-stained cock back into my pants,I sit in my chair and lean back. I try to process all that had just transpired; how incredible your lips felt, that amazing tongue of yours and how enticing your pussy looked. Everything.With these images going through my mind, I can feel my cock slowly coming back to life. I decide the best thing to do is to try and get back to work.…Hours again seem to pass by surprisingly normally, almost, as if it really was just another day at the...
Cheating
4 years ago
The car took me to the Holiday Inn hotel. My body left the car and walked into reception. Ginger was waiting for me by the reception desk. There was no love lost between the two of us. He indicated with his finger that I should follow him. I did, we entered a room, no ordinary hotel room, it was bigger than normal at one end there was a television with several chairs arranged around it and a small bar fridge, at the other end was a double bed with wrought iron headboard and foot board. Both...
3 years ago
Yasmin walked towards Shalini, stark naked. Their bodies touched, Yasmin’s breasts crushed against Shalini’s back while her crotch touched her ass. Shalini’s body trembled immediately, and her pussy began pulsating. Yasmin’s dusky skin contrasted perfectly with Shalini’s fair skin as their bodies wrapped around each other. Yasmin pressed Shalini’s breasts with her slender hands while Shalini explored Yasmin’s meaty thighs with her soft hands. Their souls intermingled as their auras hugged....
Lesbian
4 years ago
The next day, he only had one woman to service but three lawns to cut, but the day after that he was at another cheerleader’s home and her randy mother, the girl’s college-age sister and the young girl herself all demanded his attention. It took more than two hours but he was paid $150 for his efforts and left behind three happy women and a carefully trimmed lawn behind. That afternoon another young housewife hired him to do her lawn and cut back some bushes. When he was about half done, she...
4 years ago
Having met whilst walking dogs sixty-three-year-old married woman Emily Wagstaff and fifty-nine-year-old divorced Trevor Hinton developed a friendship that rapidly turned into an affair.They had sex as often as practical but, although certainly not happily married, Emily was reluctant to leave her husband Arthur who at this stage had no idea that his wife was getting fucked elsewhere although he had very little interest in doing it himself.The lovers had taken a detour via Trevor's house before...
Mature
2 years ago
School was going to let out for summer soon, and with the completion of my 8th grade year I would be getting promoted to high school. I was now 14 years old, and I could only guess that classes and tests just got more dull and trying from then on. My newest concern about the rapidly approaching end of the school year was losing some of my friends when we had to go to different schools. I would miss my band mates, and my football team, but nobody more so than Anna. I knew Anna by...
3 years ago
Hi, iss readers. This is Arun again from Kerala, now 34 years old, with my next story. This story is about my cousin named Sreeshma (name changed). She is 18 years old. I have been seducing her for last 2 years. Only after her 18th birthday, she surrendered her virginity to me. We were doing FB & WhatsApp chat for a long time. She had even asked for porn videos from me. I had sent all videos I got to her. I knew one day I will have her. Initially, she told she will not lose her virginity before...
Incest
1 year ago
Reddit Wincest, aka r/Wincest! I am sure that some of y’all actually thought that you would get to see siblings or whatnot getting it on in a subreddit called r/wincest/. While the word wincest does suggest something like that, you could also use your fucking remaining brain cells to figure out that this is all in good fun. So you will get plenty of wincest themed content, but not actual incest.Let me explain it a bit better. Win + Incest are the words that were used in the creation of...
Reddit NSFW List
2 years ago
Jake White Continues The next day started far too early for Jake after his exertions the night before, but he was washed, dressed and breakfasted ready to accompany his uncle on their walk down to the chandlery ready for the day’s business. Over the next few months he was to learn about all the items that the chandlery stocked, how they bought and from whom, who they supplied and how, and about the accounting system too. Jake gradually adjusted to life at home too. Dinner was always a...
2 years ago
Hi, it’s me the naughtysexaddict. I was overwhelmed with the response to my first story “Virgin Gets Threesome Experience!”. Thanks to everyone for the feedback. I wish I will be adding more of my real life sexual encounters here to entertain you. If any girl or aunt interested in having a sex chat with me you can reach me at I promise it will be just between us. This sexual encounter happened when I was in my final year college. I was calm and silent student in my college. I used to be shy in...
3 years ago
"I want you to meet my friend." The idea had been a quick drink after a long week. Friday afternoons I liked to sneak away and slip into my favourite watering hole. Olisa knew where I would be and frequently met me when he could. We wouldn't stay long. Asa would get angry if I drank too much or had too much fun. Olisa was late but his wife Nkoli was there already sitting with a tall fair woman. The woman was not unnaturally large but she seemed to be. Next to Nkoli's tiny frame she looked like...
3 years ago
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I have rewritten this story using names (not real ) and added a little more to the body. I will review chapter 2 and 3 and revise there as well. I am also in the process of writting a new chapter that I hope will be up soon. This story started about 8 years ago. My second marriage was to a younger woman who had three children. Two daughters and a son. I helped raise the children, supported them financially...
2 years ago
When you get here your outfit will consist of flat heeled black shoes , silky dark thigh high stockings , short black silk skirt , and a sheer white sleeveless , collarless button up the front blouse. No panties or bra will you wear. The next time she worked she came dressed in this outfit and she stripped as soon as she arrived. He enjoyed looking at her beautiful young body as she did her duties around the apartment. Then about a week after she started he decided he wanted a sponge bath. He...
3 years ago
‘WHAT? Oh my god, oh my god,’ I cried and I watched as the tears began to flow down Jenni’s cheeks. She had a death grip on my hand and I wanted so desperately to kiss her and hold her and love her at that magic moment but we both knew we didn’t dare. We hurried through the process of paying the bill and literally danced around the car all the way home. Mom almost got knocked down as we held her and kissed her and told her how much we loved her, but then it was our turn and we cried and...
4 years ago
Hi, I know names don’t matter here. So you can call me any name as you wish. Let me take you to the indian sex story straight away. It was during the first few months of our relationship, and as you all may be knowing we were in deep love as every other who is in deep love during their initial stage of the relationship. This is the stage you will do anything for your partner. And I wanted to surprise my partner as well. She was going to her hometown after work for a few days leave. I thought to...
1 year ago
The beautiful Russian babe Misha Maver steps into our studio today, horny and ready to have her tight hole plugged by a big black dick. After a brief interview she gets undressed revealing a nice tattooed body, a nice pair of boobs and a big and firm ass ready to get fucked hard. She also has a very nice shaved pussy but that doesn’t get any action today. Instead, her ass hole gets a tongue massage before taking in every inch of dick in different positions before catching a big load of...
xmoviesforyou
4 years ago
"You are so going to get lucky this evening." Sarah said."God I hope so," Kirsty replied as she stood before the full-length mirror and gave a twirl. Her reflection showing an excited young lady who returned her wide cheeky grin. Her newly cut blonde hair was shorter than she would normally wear it but Kirsty was pleased with the effect. Sexier, she thought as she watched her image complete the twirl. The mini skirt was also much shorter than anything she had ever worn, but showed her great...
1 year ago
Julz Gotti visits Preston today after sharing some pictures last night. She gets to show off her hot body to us and we can’t help but be memorized by that ass. We get her to twerk, show off her tits, and make her crawl so we can check out every part of that young and tight body. We get down to business quickly as Julz is ready to suck some dick. You can tell she’s been wanting this because she gives a sloppy deep throat. They proceed to go doggy style and it gets so hot, that they...
xmoviesforyou
4 years ago
Crystal City, Virginia The emergency video conference was thrown together in a hurry. Not all the members were available on such short notice, nor at that time of the night. Captain Arnold, United States Navy, retired, was wearing jeans and an old Naval Academy sweatshirt. He hung up the secure phone and glanced at his terminal. He hadn't been able to gather any new information before the meeting started. His aide entered the room, looking remarkably fresh, carrying a thin folder. Arnold...
3 years ago
He was not surprised the following Saturday when Anne Lucas accepted his invitation to have lunch at the Lisboa. It all went well and they chatted about mutual acquaintances at All Saints and commiserated about the tactlessness of the new Vicar. When it came to coffee David used his well tried line, “I would suggest coffee, but it is cheap and nasty here. Normally I go home and make my own, but I don’t suppose...” “As you introduced me to this excellent restaurant, I’m not going to doubt...
4 years ago
Dear Diary, I was so nervous to be doing this. Hi, my name is Raven and I am quite successful but there is a part of me that wants to take control, that wants to feel alive. Its very sad when no one knows about my secret. Im waiting for her to come out of the bathroom now. Im so nervous and excited. I just can't stand it. I wonder how many people will watch live this time. I am a Christian Psychologist by day and a lesbian webcam model by night. I met this particular girl online. I met her on...
Lesbian
4 years ago
The following new characters appear in this chapter and others: Captain Roanoke Commander of the Space Marines, 6’-0’’ tall, 190 pounds, 32 years old, short black hair, blue eyes Hanson, Robert J. Marine Staff Sergeant, 5’-10’’ tall, 165 pounds, 28 years old, very short brown hair, blue eyes. Epps Marine Corporal, 5’-11’’ tall, 160 pounds, 22 years old, short black hair, brown eyes Gram Marine Staff Sergeant, 5’-10’’ tall, 165 pounds, 30 years old, short blond hair, blue...
1 year ago
My boyfriend and I have been together for about six months. As the holidays were approaching he mentioned that his son, Alex, who goes to college in New York, will be stopping by. I was at home one day when my boyfriend called and said Alex took an earlier flight and will arrive in a couple hours. When I opened the door I was surprised at how tall and handsome he was. We sat down in the living room and after a short talk I went outside to take care of some business calls. Soon after though, he...
xmoviesforyou
4 years ago
He smiled with a sense of palpable satisfaction, listening to the hungry slurping sounds rising up from below. Justice. Sweet justice. Memories came as goose bumps prickled the back of his neck. He was getting close. Any other time, the tragic memories would have been too painful to bear. But not anymore. Now they only heightened his sexual pleasure and vindication.He remembered the time he was chained to a pole in the plantations courtyard and whipped. All this because he laid hands on...
4 years ago
The sun glistened off her wet body as Naomi climbed from the pool, her skimpy bikini clinging to her small, but perky breasts. She squeezed the water from her long black hair and sat in the chair beside me. Naomi flashed me her beautiful, radiant smile and began reading from her magazine. I had always envied her, even though she was my best friend. Naomi had naturally tanned skin that shimmered in the sunlight, straight hair and long nails, and was always so petite. I was pale with scarlet-red...
4 years ago
College for me did have its moments of binge drinking and smoking way too much weed but it was nowhere near the fun seen in any movie. Instead I found it to be the place where I learned to become the adult that I so desperately tried to avoid being. It was my first glimpse into real responsibility and the first place where I began to understand that my actions can have repercussions that will follow me until the day I die. My name is Stephen I'm 35 years old now with a wife and 3 k**s and...
3 years ago
I had been out with some friends for a late night dinner on a Saturday evening when one of my friends suddenly fell ill. So our plans fell through and I returned home earlier than expected. As I entered the front door, I noticed that the TV in the family hall was on. The living room was accessible from the family hall through an open door and from the kitchen via a swinging door. A shuttered "window" also looked in on it from the kitchen. It was originally supposed to be a dining room, but it...
3 years ago
Hello all ISS fans. This is Abhishek Singh, a 18 years old boy from Delhi. I have written many stories in ISS from past one year. But from few weeks I have been quite for some personal reasons. But know there will be some blast from the past by me. Now I will write only insect stories in ISS and I am sure that u will enjoy too much. This story starts from here. I’m sure you have seen those commercials from Parker Brothers about keeping the family together with a game night. Well that’s what we...
Incest
2 years ago
Tara Edwards watched the cherubic face of her adorable three year old daughter. Her curly brown hair framed her beautiful face that was a lighter version of her beloved husband. How could something so simple bring both unspeakable joy and earth-shattering heart ache? She knew that she should probably quit being so hard on herself. She knew that her doctor and counsellor were right, she just needed time to grieve after the miscarriage. But dammit, she needed to be back to herself again. Or maybe...
3 years ago
Hi friends I’m Prince I Want To Tell You my Own True Story,() mai aap sabko apna aur apni sister ka intro deta hu my name is prince body type normal im now 18 year Old Aur Meri Didi Ka NAm He Sneha(name Chenged) aur age he 24 aur wo mere chacha ki ladki he but muze meri sagi behan ki tarah he bat tab ki he jab mai 10th me tha tab muze sex ke bareme jyada kuch nai pata tha par 10th me meri kuch aise ladko se dosti hogai jinki wajah se mai sex kr bareme janane laga blue film dekhne laga...
1 year ago
We had played with sex fantasy quizzes for some time and in some weird, deep thought in the back recesses of my mind I had hoped they would come true. Both of us have struggled talking about sex perhaps the way we were brought up. After a good friend joined the lifestyle (swingers) our world had slowly opened up as I felt more and more comfortable talking about sex with my wife and friends. One evening with our best friend Paul we were chatting about the taking sex fantasy and I never ever...
Wife
4 years ago
Hey friends your maddy is back with another kamukta story. First of all thanks for replying me on my mail about my previous stories and please do comment on my mail for this story too. For all the new readers let me tell about myself. Maddy from mumbai height 5.5″, like to party make new friends and hangout. And now let me introduce to gorgious sardarni, her name is simo, got fair milky skin, boobs 36c with perfect ass wer u can hit on and have fun. Let me cont in hindi now cz from ur comments...
3 years ago
A/N: Here’s the last chapter folks. All loose ends are tied up here. Enjoy! Thank you Blackstallion21 for everything! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ XIII. New Beginnings The sky was an array of pinks, reds, and purples as the heroes of Serenai arrived at the remains of the Unicorn Kingdom. As the flyers landed, their riders got off of them before the flyers changed form. ‘Oh my goodness!’ exclaimed Joyce when she saw her home. Pristine stepped forward before turning to her court. ‘This...
2 years ago
So just a few things I would like to bring to your attention. The first item would be that yes, I am Mishikail; the co-author of the Eternal Series that captius wrote. This is my private account on this site and I thought I would just let people know that. Even though this account is not named Mishikail, I am still her. I chose the username Oblivionthree for a reason; mostly because I think it sounds kind of cool. So some of you may not believe I am who I am claiming to be, but oh well....