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First time

My first time was in high scho*l. My boyfriend and I had been fooling around for a while, never getting beyond making out because I had my first kiss with him as well. One day, we were walking down the street after dinner, holding hands, and talking sweet nothings, stopping once in a while to duck into an alleyway and make out for a little while. Keep in mind I was in high scho*l so this type of horniness and boring date is expected. I pulled him by the hand into another alleyway, smiling as he...

What An Experience

My first look at him happened as I was walking towards Ham fields. I had just gotten off of the bus and was walking down Ham Street towards the hunting ground.As I looked for traffic before crossing the road he appeared around the corner on a mountain bike. He was stripped to the waist, wearing only a tight pair of shorts and a pair of trainers. The sweat from his exertions was trickling down his bronzed abdomen. His hairless chest gleamed in the hot sun, the deeper brown of his nipples drew my...

Max and Megan Ch 05

**A special thanks to bikoukumori for editing this chapter** Max Roberts yawned. He was dead tired and completely worn out from worrying. His ass was numb from the uncomfortable plastic chair. It didn’t help that Christian had been glued to him the whole time, he’d become used to it. The elevator dinged and the door slid open. A skinny elderly woman with electric pink hair, sporting a black spandex dress walked out of it. Max choked back a laugh. ‘LouLou, over here.’ Hal waved at the woman....

fun

conrads storyI have been asking my wife Nat to enjoy a group sex situation and over the Years I have had many e-mails and pictures sent by swingers asking to join us. Nat is a professional woman who has earned promotion in her job by working hard but she does not know how sexy she is. We decided to visit Leeds recently as part of celebrating Nat’s promotion, bit prior to this I had been e-mailing a number of black guys who wanted to meet-up with us. The guys all seemed nice and discrete and...

BoundGangBangs Alana Cruise Damsel In Distress

Five bored mechanics are standing around their garage, talking shop when one says he’d been thinking about proposing to his girlfriend. The other guys strongly disapprove and tell him to keep his options open. Just then, Alana Cruise walks into their shop, looking hot in a short tight teal dress and tells the guys that her car just broke down outside. The guys slowly surround her and tell Alana that they’ll take care of her. They all begin to grab at her body with their ten hands....

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waking up as a cock wore

I was away for work in the hotel drinking wondering if tomorrow would go as plannedi went t sleep early and of course the next day was a real nightmare, problems after problems, i endup finishing late and at 22h i arrived at the hotel exhaustedI took a quick shower and made my way to the barI had my first scotch , then my second when a black dude came to sit at the bar''hey ''''hey''casual talk ensueboth in town for workwe drank talking about work and stuf, the guy maybe 10yr more than me...

Far Future Fembot DarleneChapter 29 Heels

Thoughts I was very pleased when the door opened to see Anna enter, wearing no more than I was. More than anyone else Anna had to know how I felt at this instant. A moment later we embraced, with me rising up on my toes utilizing my new balance, although I still couldn't match Anna's height. Our busts almost matched however. We didn't need to exchange words, and a resync to update me on events while I'd slept could wait. I was just so pleased because, even if I didn't have an owner...

Getting out of the Rut Chapter 10

Pushing and pulling "Well?" Carol said when we made it to the room."You want to see some of the movies?""I don't think so, maybe save them for a day when we need a laugh?"I chuckled. "Did you know about the camera under the bed."That brought out a giggle in Carol. "What did it see?""Mostly Eddie's leaking cock while he was working on the lock. The best part was recording the bed noises."There was a flash of recognition. "That's how you did it.""Did it fool you?""It fooled...

Novels

Me My Girlfriend and My Ex Girlfriend I set them u

I Was visiting my Mother in Santa Monica and was snuggled up with My new Girlfriend Angel, who would eventually become my wife and the Mother of My c***d, We were board, and trying to figure out what to do for some fun. When the phone rang, It was Janine My Ex It was a real Shitty Break up She was a true Nympho and pretty much would Fuck Anything including I was told her Horse.Janine Had heard that I was in town from Riverside, and was checking up to see what I was up to, and if I wanted...

Amanda Adventures 2 Amanda introduces Toby to Ka

Amanda and Toby parked the car and proceeded to the shopping centre (meadow hall) and met Katie there. Katie looked gorgeous and extremely sexy she was wearing a summery floral print dress which hugged her figure and attenuated her slim waist and exaggerated her already ample tits.Her eyes lit up when she saw Toby, has did his when he saw her.My wife Amanda also looked stunning, she wore a grey flannel skirted suit which was very tight. The skirt was just above the knee and she wore very high...

Untitled Gangbang

© 2001 Kenny N Gamera I stood at the bar in a Nevada whorehouse with a bottle of near beer watching a camera crew do their pre-shoot duties. I wondered how in the hell I ended up in this situation for maybe the millionth time since my friend asked me to tag along with him. I didn't belong in places like this waiting to be part of a live studio audience to a pornstar gangbang. Just be thankful, Gamera, I reminded myself, you could be part of that imbroglio. Which is what Fred had wanted...

The New StartChapter 3 Getting Acquainted

With reluctance, they left the beer behind and followed the stream to the cliff where they found it easier to scale beside the water's edge. Upon reaching the top of the cliff, they looked out on a vast meadow of low shrubs and grasses and dotted with clumps of forest. From their elevated vantage point atop a large boulder, they had climbed this topography extended to all horizons with the exception to that on their left, which had, what appeared from this distance to be a huge range of...

Sexual Autobiography

The only reason behind not disclosing my identity is because I am expecting true feedbacks for my writing! If you really like the story you can write me at “unidentified at live dot com”. This story covers the desires of a GIRL before loosing her virginity & also expectations after that! NO MORE WASTING OF TIME, the story goes like this… He laid me on the bed, his technique displaying his sheer adeptness. The angle, my descent, how he didn’t take his eyes off me yet I landed on target with no...

Nai Shaadi Shuda Biwi Ki Seal Pack Toda

Hi … Mai rehan apni dusri story lekar aya hua pahli story aplogone padha hoga “train me do bacho ki maa ko chadar ke andar chudai” uski kafi mail mili mujhe uske liye thankx all ab mai dusri story pe ata hu..Lekin usse pahle mai rqst karta hu ke aap logo ko meri story kaisi lagi jarur bataye mera eml addrs ha “ jaisa ki aap jante hai mai kolkata me rahta hu aur akele rahta hu ye karib 3 ya 4 mnth pahle ki baat hai mai office wapas ghar Thoda jaldi agaya meri tabyat kuch thik nhi thi mai jaise...

Gym Access for Cum

You see, it is a small village we live in. A new community of newly build houses. If you open any gay app here, you will find noone that realy makes you’re dick twitch. Me and my husband just moved into our own small bungalow here. Just enough room for us two. Since we won’t have any offspring, we decided to have one room as a homegym. Working out is a big part of our lifes. I am Mike, 35, lean build with a 7 inch in my workout pants. My Husband, Taylor, 28 but looks so much...

THE BOSS S DAUGHTER

THE BOSS’S DAUGHTERIt had been well over a year since Dave had seen his sister and his niece. He had been working really hard at his job and hadn’t made much time for hi family.Dave had decided to go spend a few days in Miami where his sister and her daughter Anita lived. It had been close to two years since his first encounter with his lovely niece. He had spent the last few days thinking about the sexy nineteen year old, and all the things he had plain to do to her sweet sexy body. Dave never...

Softwear Engineer Meri Rakhel

Hai dosto kaise hai aap mai iss ka regular redder hu muze aap logo se ek bat kehani ki tumhari life me jo ghatna ghti hai use hi likho our dusari bat ma – behano ki burai karna chod do jaise ki meri ma our mai our behan ko choda etc. Aap log naraj ho gaye kya koi bat nahi mai aapko ek majedar kahani padata hu .kaise mai ne ek softwear engineer ki chudai ki Mai ek Production Company me dispatch ka kam karata hu meri age 27 hai dikhne me itna smart nahi hu lekin htta-katta hu. Ek aurat ya ladki...

MyPornstarBook

If you have developed a taste for a pornstar in specific, then you might as well check out My PornStar Book where you should be able to find thousands upon thousands of pictures of the prettiest girls in the porn industry. My PornStar Book can be both viewed on your desktop PC, but it also can be viewed on your phone since the website has a mobile version as well. The page allows you to get your own dose of the most beautiful pornstar pictures in the highest quality. What you decide to do with...

Pornstar Databases

Ary s initiation

The sludge encrusted harpies circles Ary slowly. Lassa left brownish marks on the floor. "Do you wish to change..." Lassa said, in her echoing voice "I do" replied Ary "Do you have the bowls of cum from a male, female, horse and yourself?" Lassa "I do" "Do you have the bowls of shit from a male, female, horse and yourself?" "i do" "Do you have the ounce of blood." "I do" "Take these four feathers. they are the final ingredient" "Take the...

Episode 18 8211 Finding Out

It was an uneventful Sunday for most, but things were heating up at the 4th floor apartment of Mrs. Nair. Rahul, who had ventured in looking for Aarushi, was caught unaware while Mrs. Nair was naked after bathe. And Rahul had to offer all he had, including his manhood, to get out of the situation. However it was a deal, he ended up liking too. Mrs. Nair worked on his cock for close to an hour, milking him, making his cock dry. Rahul sprayed his cum all over her breasts, and now it was his turn...

Michelle 6

Some Wednesday, around late june 2000-2001. I was home alone, given the fact that my two parents worked and my sister was either working or hanging out with friends. My sister was gone for a couple of days to Montreal, to see a few shows and meet with some friends/cousins to have a good time. My mom had just called me (it was about noon) and told me that she wouldn't come back home after work, that my dad would pick her up and that they would go to some romantic dinner and come home around...

2 Love Birds Alike

2 Love Birds AlikeBy: Londebaaz Chohan If not the ultimate, Jim was almost pretty close to be the geek of the high school. Accepted that he was virgin but far more than that; he was the model boy of being so desperate for the pussy and a physical contact but absolutely unable to succeed because girls always backed away from him. Surely this impossible distance between him and all sorts of femininity gave him a rigid and hefty hard on all the time to carry in front of him, between his legs. He...

From Gay to Cumslut in 4 weeks

In my previous story you learned how I sucked my first dick, took my first cumshot, lost my anal virginity, swallowed cum, and had hot cum shot in my ass all withing 72 hours. That set me up change the way I watched porn. I know found myself watching porn to learn how to perfect sucking cock, how to cumplay after I get a load, how to take a cock deep in my ass then beg for cum in my mouth or face. I studied Asia, Jenna, ashlyn Gere, And all the other girls who sucked the famous cocks, like Tom...

Delilah s Slave

?Kneel.? On Delilah’s command, I squat painfully in my 5 inch heels before dropping my knees to the cold linoleum. Leaning back slightly, I primly smooth the pleats of my French maid’s skirt as the cruel, spiked heels dig painfully into my buttocks. Uncomfortable as it is, the position nevertheless offers some welcome relief. I’ve spent the last 2 hours performing Delilah’s weekly ?sissy maid? chores: dusting, mopping, scrubbing her stove, and washing a mountain of dishes. I’ve also polished...

Road Trip for the Ages

One summer I was driving across the country to visit my family that lives out of state. I was driving alone with my girlfriend of two years. We were driving though the middle of nowhere when she curdled up in a little ball in the passenger seat to sleep. Her ass was facing me perfectly which made it hard to focus on the road, but it looked so nice in her cute tight sweatpants. I jokingly put my hand on her butt cheek then pulled away because I knew she was not really into the whole "ass" thing....

Helping the Elderly Ch 02

This is a continuation of the original story without any recaps. Read "Helping the Elderly Part I" to get the full story from the beginning.**********Tracy fell asleep in Harry's arms wondering what it might feel like to have his gigantic member penetrate her hungry pussy. "Harry. Wake up. Harry." Tracy needed to return home to cook dinner for Jim."What? Oh, Angel. Thank you for the best treatment a man could hope for!" Harry was still reeling from his orgasm Tracy gave him some two hours ago....

My Descent Into Being a DogslutChapter 2

Last Saturday night was amazing. Everyone is having a horrible time at the minute obviously due to this ghastly virus and our ‘lockdowns.’ Hope everyone is staying safe and well. I haven’t seen any of my regular lovers for weeks now and other than messages from them to let me know how they are doing, my fun has obviously been curtailed somewhat! Everyone is with family mainly and of course Mike is now home fully (most time we have ever spent together!) Our two children are with friends...

PenthouseGold Savannah Bond Busty MILF Savannah Bond Pounces

We know busty MILF Savannah Bond loves cocks, but boy does she really pounce all over it like a ravennous cougar when it’s humongous and black. Case in point is this steamy interracial Penthouse porn video where big titty blonde takes ebony stud Rob Piper’s monstrous dark dick balls deep down her throat and juicy shaved pussy. Watch the Australian bombshell’s massive melons and big ass cheeks shake as she gets a hardcore BBC fucking until he unleashes a messy cumload on her...

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Diary of Billy Bob Chapter 10 Conclusion

This is the diary of Billy Bob McTavish, a teen boy, about he and his young girl cousin growing up, having a family and a wide variety of sexual adventures, some quite bizarre. It has ten chapters: (1) Becoming a Man, (2) Marriage, (3) House Guest, (4) Satisfying Our Guest, (5) Helping a Psychologist, (6) More Sex Therapy, (7) Mutual Therapy, (8) Our Daughter, (9) Our Daughter is 13, (10) Conclusion Billy Bob Chapter 10 (Conclusion) The girls were tired of just having sex with each other and...

My Best Friends Brother Pt 4

Introduction: I made this one a little longer:) enjoy, lemme know what you think. The next afternoon Abigail and I were at Dannis house, that morning I had earned a pop to the mouth for complaining about being too old for a babysitter. It was awkward for me being there at first, but Abigail jumped right in and started playing with one of their many exotic pets. Me and Danni went to her room to watch a movie and I laid in bed with her gingerly, trying not to lay right on my wounds. Danni, I...

Over Mom s lips

I was at the point in my life when I started waking up with hard-ons. Embarassing?Yep!Standing in line to use the bathroom,with four younger sisters?Painful!Painful,because each and every last one of them was Sexy as Hell!Standing outside of the closed bathroom door,my cock had sprung from the flap of my boxer shorts. I was in no hurry to hide it. Simply because,I watched my sisters stare at my boner. They were always licking their lips,whenever they saw my cock. In fact,my youngest sister,who...

Living Next Door to Heaven 180 Thinking About College

"Nona-Mom and Anna-Mom, can I ask you something?" "You just did, Samantha," Anna laughed. She was in a very good mood. Not only did she have Mom and Dad, she also had fresh bread. "Go ahead, dear," Mom said, poking Anna and then kissing her. Right there at the kitchen table. In front of Courtney, Jennifer, Samantha, and me. My mom kissed Anna. On the lips. With tongue. I guess there was no more hiding their relationship. Samantha squirmed a little and waited for them to come up for...

Curiosity Killed the CatChapter 29 Progress

Tuesday, June 18, 1996, Sanford Maine I lay awake snuggled between my sister and our best friend and lover CC and quietly contemplated how complex my life had gotten so far. It was hard to believe that just a relatively short time ago, I had been a single clueless teenager of fifteen-years-old. Now I was a semi-clueless teenager, sixteen-years-old, and had two girlfriends to my complete amazement and disbelief. In my quieter moments, I had been analyzing the relationship that I had...

Got My Dream Fulfilled By My Secretary

Hi, this is ilrumjack here again after a long time. I wanted to share an episode that happened recently at my workplace. Hope you find it interesting. All ladies who want to know more can write to me at and we can have some good times. Here it is… My working days are Mon-Fri but sometimes I do land up at work on Saturdays – basically to catch up on pending work. Hence, I was at work last Saturday. Being a non-working day only a few of my colleagues had come in to work. I work on the corporate...

First time trying bbcs

Hi I’m mad my hubby is Paul I’ve told this story before so I hope I am not boring everyone. We tried swinging but it was so – so. My husband wanted to share me with another guy and I was a little suspicious and said no….several times. Then we were at a nudist resort in Caribbean I had a it to drink and we smoked a lot of herb and I was around naked black men for the first time in person. Simply said I was turned on by them and they seemed to be attracted to me. A couple of guys in particular...

Horny Amateur Housemaid Goes Berserk

Hi everyone. Just for a change, I am from Pakistan and have been a fan of ISS for long. I have been living abroad for a while now and due to some free time, I thought about writing erotic tales now. I used to read stuff here which would most of the times be a major turn-on and hence I thought, why not post my own for everyone to enjoy. In this sex story, I will include some words in Urdu as well. Before I begin, I would like to introduce myself as well as the other character in this story. I am...

Vixen Jia Lissa Tori Black When In Paris

Some people can’t understand married life – but not Tori. She loves her husband and they have always prioritised their desires before anything else – without exceptions and this keeps everything very interesting. They have a little tradition, whereby Tori likes to find the perfect girl to suit both of their needs every so often – and their vacation in Paris is no exception. A waitress, Jia, has already caught her eye, and it is time to put her plan into action for the...

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Perversion Chapter Two

Chapter Two: The Pool(Please note the people mentioned in these stories are fictional and bare no relationship to people either alive or dead. These stories contain explicit sexual descriptions and are aimed at the over 18’s)(Not interested in the story the sexy bits are at the end) The bus travelled in silence as we all knew if there were any shenanigans, they would just turn the bus around and take us back to the home. I sat in one of the single seats with Maureen just in front. It wasn’t...

Short and Sweet

This story, like most of what I publish, is a total fantasy, not a word, person, or location is based on anything more than an erotic thought in my head. I have had a couple conversations with someone that provided some inspiration, I will leave it up to her to find the part(s) that are all hers. Hope you enjoy, love to hear comments.Short and Sweet[/]I met Charlotte, really more by accident than design. I was single and she was too, so that was a plus in the sense that neither of us had to...

B J Jones the Story of My LifeChapter 232

By 8 PM Friday we were done with the enrollment process. There had still been up to ½ hour waits at Warrington and Rochester but that was behind us now. The teams were on planes headed home. By 10 everyone would be here. The security groups went back to regular work shifts with the afternoon shift today. A holiday weekend right off and the first week of classes next week would seal the deal. I was antsy; I couldn't wait to see my mates. The four days seemed like forever. There would be no...

Housewife Trapped

Hello to all readers…this is my first story on net so forgive me if any spelling mistakes are there.. this is really true story..you will feel the reality in this story.. this story is about a housewife seduced and trapped by me and my friend Rohit helped me in doing this. My name is Sazy , im 25 year old doing job.this incident is about 4 years back. Rohit is one of my best online friend i had,we chatted for around 3 months before trying this.Rohit likes to chat about his wife Sunita.According...

Lost My Virginity To A Spanish Milf

This is a true story that happened in July of 2018 while my parents were shopping at Splau (shopping mall in Barcelona). I am a 20 years old boy who studies at the university here in Barcelona. I am a normal guy and a frequent reader here. Now I will share with you how I lost my virginity. This is a story of how I lost my virginity to a very attractive granny. I was returning from Lidl (a supermarket in Europe). I saw an old lady struggling with her plastic bags so I decided to help her with...

19 Year Old Virgin

Was it really almost 20 yrs ago? Doesn’t seem like it. I can remember….. Nineteen years old and still a virgin. Now that’s something you don’t want to get around to the rest of your shipmates. But hey, I was a little drunk and looking for sympathy when the subject of “last piece” came up. I was only temporarily assigned to the ship and wasn’t really part of the group. They let me tag along sometimes and that’s why I was there when the...

HotCrazyMess Leah Lee Keeping Secrets

Leah Lee has been trouble for her stepfather since he married into the family, but things escalate when he finds Leah’s phone. Scrolling through Leah’s messages, he realizes that she’s planning on hooking up with a guy over the weekend instead of going to a friend’s. When her stepdad confronts her about her lies, Leah is initially contrite. Claiming that she’s been really horny and she needs to get some this weekend, she asks her dad to keep her secret. When he is...

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First bisexual experience in winter between three women and a man

(True story)December 1st, 2017: I woke up around 10 am with an irresistible urge to meet a couple for the weekend FFM adventure.This would be my first experience in the company of both a man and a woman.So I logged onto the libertine site 'Madintouch’ where I noticed with astonishment that my profile had had a lot of success with the fairer sex but also with couples. I absolutely had not expected that.That said, like any such website there were people who roused my curiosity as well as many...

Bisexual

My sisters Big Tits

I noticed that my sister, Donna had about the biggest set of tits in the family. It was a true delight for me to be close to her when she sat beside me to watch television. Sometimes, at the dinner table, she would catch me looking over at her enormous round jugs, and several times, I noticed that there was a secretive little smile that ran across her face briefly. I could sometimes see the impression that her tits made on the blouse she was wearing, how the nipples seemed to harden and strain...

Sex in PragueChapter 2

After a few minutes, Anna draped her gorgeous body around mine in the pool and we kissed deeply as she stroked my body tenderly. “Before I give you my body, I need to let you know that I bullied my lover into showing me the correspondence that you and he have had over the years.” “Wow!” I replied, “Were you shocked?” “Darling man, do you think I would be naked in this pool with you if one thing in those letters had shocked me? Quite the opposite, your descriptions of your sexual adventures...

My oral lust and secret sperm swallowing sessions

When I was 18 and a freshman in college I lived in a dorm on campus which sat up in the hills above town. I had meet a guy who was 24 and had a place in town, I fell in love with him quickly and couldn't wait to be out of class so I could go to his place and fool around for the rest of the day. We were amazing together. One day though I did something i never thought I would do and it led me to be open to the type of person i truly am.I had just gotten out of class and called Jake to tell him I...

Sister s Horny DogChapter 8

The next day, Babs told her sister Madge all about her late- night sex session with their German Shepherd. "Then what did you do after you sucked him off and swallowed his cum?" Madge asked thickly. "I got him to fuck my ass for me!" Babs said with a gleam in her eye. "I guess what you mean is that you got him to fuck your pussy from behind," Madge said, not sure that she had correctly understood her sister. "No, Sis, I meant just what I said," Babs said with a grin, enjoying the...

A Critical PathChapter 14

Sally was as good as her word. She had a rehearsal with the LPO on Tuesday evening and presented Nick on Wednesday morning with a brochure and a contact telephone number. "There is an entry test," she said. "First of all whether you can sing in tune and second, your sight-reading ability. I gather that's in stages. You know: all one key without any sharps or flats and all crotchets. Then they test you on change of key and timing." "So much easier when the choir's changing key as...

First Time Glory Hole

After Rebecca, my first wife and I, broke up, and even though we'd rarely ever been truly 'happy' as a married couple, I was depressed for a while after words. Even though unhappily married, I'd gotten use to her being in my life, and even the angry outbursts between us were at least something, rather than nothing. Still, I felt somewhat 'relieved' that the anger had started to subside somewhat in those quiet, lonely hours following our separation and then divorce.Not long after words, I...

Don t Say A Word

You had offered to stay later then everyone else to finish up and clean up…everyone was gone and you were working alone…it was dusk and you were tired and wanted to call it a day… You were working out back when I walked in…the place was hot yet kinda cold, very drab looking, not much to the building yet…walls and a floor a cement floor that was hard and grey…the unit was dimly lit and rather small…just perfect for what I had in mind… I could hear you outside busy trying to end your day…I got...

I Is for Initiation

George stared blankly ahead into the DVD / Video tape aisle displaying and offering scenes beyond his wildest experience but not far from his dearest dreams. George was the assistant manager at Adult Video Warehouse in Ottawa. He sold a lot of exciting material for various vicarious kinky clientele. But his job, his dragging time behind the counter and his life in general was anything but exciting. That is, until today. At 3:45 p.m. on this warm September day, four girls waltzed into the...

Sarah Spanks Her Lazy Husband

Kevin was still in bed when Sarah breezed into the bedroom. She looked down at her husband of 6 months who stirred, looked up through half opened eyes and asked “what’s up Sarah? Why the racket?” Sarah stood by the bed and said “Kevin, its 11 O’clock. You should be up anyway.” “But it’s the weekend” he sighed. He could see his wife looked stressed. She always did when it came to getting him to do anything around the house. He was generally a lazy person. He knew it. It made his wife very tense...

The Smith Family Part 2 Austin s First Lay

Sandra grabbed Austin's hand and placed it on her left breast. "Play with my nipple," Sandra said. Austin did as she told him, and felt it get hard. He quickly realized what was happening and got into it, putting his right hand on her other breast and playing with that one too. He felt his cock growing in his shorts and precum forming, getting him even more excited. "Go ahead. Lick them," she told him. Austin was happy to oblige and shoved his face into them. He began to motorboat her then...

Taboo

Cumqueen Chronicle

Greek Festival August 5th 1989 Hi Guys! I have read a lot of so called "true" stories on the internet, but I must honestly say I believe most of them are works of pure fiction. That's perfectly alright with me, I enjoyed reading them none of the less, it only makes it hard for me to convince my readers, that every word I write is in fact a true memory of my life is. I hereby solemnly swear, that every written word of my chronicle has happened exactly the way described! In writing these...

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