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The 34GGG* summit in Seoul on Wednesday ended in disaster after political, economic, and sexual tensions erupted between the participants.
Presidential Mistress Vanessa Knight was able to escape safely from the fracas after a small struggle; her injuries amounting to no more than several hickeys, some smeared lipstick, and a torn bra.
Leaving the summit bedraggled and tired, but still determined, the Presidentress immediately called for an emergency press conference:
“We were discussing trade levies, when the Empress of China reached over and squeezed my slave's balls. Only I get to do that.” the Presidentress said. “Given her actions, Empress Liang has no right to complain about a pinched nipple or two.”
Fortunately no serious injuries were sustained, but the ensuing 30-woman wrestle was enough to disrupt the proceedings and bring the summit to an early close. A heavy blow for Knight, who bears much of the responsibility for the brawl, and had also hoped to use the 34GGG to secure the transport of low-willpower males from so-called “masturbator havens” to her own shores.
The Presidentress - now left with no clear direction - has reaffirmed her commitment to tackle the urgent shortage of new boobslaves:
"I regret the setbacks we faced at the 34GGG, especially Empress Liang's intentional sabotage of our negotiations, but achieving cleavage parity is still, absolutely, my number one priority, and that goal is still, absolutely, within our reach. I won't lie. The current cock shortage is severe, but the long-term impact has been greatly exaggerated, and if we take the right measures, then I am certain that every deserving woman will eventually find a boobslave of her own."
But many commentators are not impressed. Experts have accused the Presidentress of 'wishful thinking'. Laura Zalas, Professor of economics at Saint Anastasia University, has been particularly critical:
“Frankly, Knight's statement is utter balls. It has been several years since the blessing came upon us, and since then, 60% of men have gracefully decided to dedicate their lives to a partner's cleavage, but only 30% of women have achieved total dominance of a male. At this point, slave redistribution is the only sane way to achieve total parity.”
Professor Zalas, was also critical of the Presidentress's policies, taking particular aim at Knight's promise to spread the blessing to all adult women:
“It's complete madness to deepen more cleavages when we already lack enough cocks to fill the current ones. Look, it's a simple economic fact; the more blessed women there are in a population, the bigger the boobs, and the greater the demand for dick. I simply can't understand why Knight would promise something like this. With her bizarre policies, and her abhorrent actions at 34GGG, the Presidentress has shown us that it takes more than nice tits to run a country.”
But the Presidentress was quick to rebuke critics, even mentioning Professor Zalas by name in her post-34GGG speech:
"As usual, Zalas has completely misconstrued my words. I don't blame her, it's simply the kind of jealous, petty behaviour that I would expect from a woman flat enough to be able to buy her bras out of a supermarket bargain-bin.
'Cleavage parity', or 'cleavage equity', has never meant a cock for every cleavage. I have always made it clear that every man deserves to serve breasts, but not every woman deserves to have her breasts served. Many women are incapable of that level of responsibility, and for these women, a satisfied cleavage is not an automatic right.
Furthermore, my voters and online fans will know that I have also always been opposed to slave redistribution. It steals slaves from responsible TitMistresses, and grants them to flat-chested novices. It breaks up families, and friendships. It negates years of careful slave training. In other nations we've seen husbands stolen from loving wives. Sons separated from caring mothers. Students pulled away from attentive teachers.
We cannot have that here. We must not punish women for the mistakes of men. And you must understand that it is men who have caused this crisis. It is men who have proved too immature to know their rightful place. It is men who are often too selfish to devote themselves to the worship of women. And it is men - feckless masturbators - who would rather fuck their own fists than pleasure their wives' cleavages."
But the Presidentress's stance strikes some as self-serving. Many ask whether it is fair for the Presidentress to hoard so many slaves when so many women are forced to beg and cajole to obtain just one.
Presidentress Knight has been described by her supporters as 'smoking hot', but discontent with her rule continues to grow. Some rivals even suggest that it may be time for a democratic big-booby beauty pageant to determine a successor.
Mistress Amalie Verde, an organiser of the 34GGG, declined to comment when asked her opinion of the Presidentress, but when asked whether she feared that the controversy would affect the reputation of the summit she reportedly responded with a shrug:
"It happens mostly every year. We just try to keep oil and a video camera on stand-by."
*34GGG stands for the Global Group of Governments. A yearly international gathering for the leaders of 34 nations, and the representatives of several important international organisations.
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