Corvino s Defense of Homosexuality
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Surprisingly Surprise Sex free porn video
Jacob was pumped as he walked out on stage for a karaoke/improv night. He had two minutes to make a good impression and get the audience to laugh. This was his chance, at last, to be a comic and see where it took him. Money, fame, sex and being a celebrity all ran through his mind. He was ready!
"Hi everybody, my name is Jacob and we're going to see how people respond to sex."
He began with, "Guys know they can talk about sex and laugh, joke and sometimes brag but they have difficulty talking to women about sex. It's weird. That seems like the ultimate win-win situation. Guys, just ask her what her favorite position is? If you feel comfortable asking, go ahead and ask. You're not alone so just lean over and ask. It really is simple; just ask. It's just four words. You have your opportunity right now! The answer may be very revealing. Go ahead, I'll wait."
He paused before continuing, "Ok, now ladies, if your man asked, raise your right hand. Ok, my next question: if he didn't ask and you wanted him to, raise your left hand. See, it's easier for guys to listen to me joke about sex than to talk to your woman about it. You guys in the audience just proved it!
"It'll be a win-win situation except for one minor detail. Women will now have the opportunity to tell him what your favorite position is. But what if he thinks you're "kinky?" Woooo... Would you tell your girlfriends your new boyfriend is really nice but he thinks you're kinky? Would you dare tell your mom? If you want to, there's really only one time you can. It'll be a memorial time period in your life. Oops, I meant to say strawberry. I promised not to use that other word tonight.
"So you tell your mom your new boyfriend is nice but he thinks you're kinky and watch her face. The look will be priceless! Shock, wonder, disbelief will likely appear. She may turn white as a ghost. Her jaw may drop and her eyes get wide. What you won't expect is a grin.
"Think about that. You've just told your mom your new boyfriend is nice but thinks you're kinky and she smiles at you. You wouldn't be expecting that! And you know what that means!
"But here's where timing is so very very important. You've just told your mom and watched her reaction. Then you can say "April Fools!" and smile innocently. And dress innocent too! Her facial expression will go from relief to pissed that you tricked her. Everybody has a phone with a camera. If you can, make a video of it. And if your mom smiled, you now know something she didn't want you to know. Now she's really pissed. And if she realized you've made a video of it, she's really really pissed. But you'll have a good laugh about it. Just don't expect your mom to laugh."
Easing into his routine now, he continued, "We're all a little kinky in one way or another. We're just not organized about it. We seem to be organized about just about anything. America has had some unusual groups and organizations in our history. We've had the Federalists, the tea party, the Puritans, vegetarians, nudists, fifty shades of gray, and more.
"Now let's do a little revelation. How many people do you know who will admit to being kinky? Has anybody ever asked you what your favorite kink is? It shouldn't be a big deal because being kinky can be a lot of fun. Some of you may not know it but America used to have a very popular group called 'The Kinks.' They were very popular and almost everybody knew somebody who liked The Kinks.
"If you don't know what The Kinks are, look around. For those who do know what The Kinks are, DON'T SAY ANYTHING! Just raise your hand.
"You can ask random people today if they ever liked The Kinks and you'll get some very interesting answers. You'll quickly learn what The Kinks are. You may even want to learn more. I'm sure you'll find other people who would suddenly want to know about The Kinks. Especially if you're a young and cute woman and you walk up to a group of young guys and ask, 'Do you like The Kinks?' You'll have their undivided attention better than any push-up bra can!"
He finished with, "As I leave, I can't help but think there's going to be some very interesting conversations in cars tonight."
Jacob smiled and waved goodbye to his audience as they applauded. 'Not bad for the first attempt,' he thought.
Harry passed him and smiled. "Good job!"
"Thanks!"
Barbara, the assistant manager smiled as she hurried by. "Not bad, not bad at all!"
Jacob smiled in return but she was already gone. He sat down in the "Entertainer's Room" and drew a deep breath.
'I did it! I did it!' he told himself. His heart was still racing, this was a dream night come true!
The knock on the door shook him from his thought. "Come in!"
Two women entered. Both wore heels and fish-net stockings poke out of their short skirts. "We just wanted to say we loved your skit! You were hilarious!"
"Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. This was actually my first skit in public."
"Really? Wow! Can I get your autograph?"
"Uh, yeah. Sure."
"I've got a marker here. It's in hot pink. Can you sign just above my panty line?"
With that, she turned around, hiked her skirt up past her panties, and bent over. Her panties were bright white and lacy and hugged a nice looking ass.
Jacob's cock responded to her suggestion. 'Yes!' he thought, 'I'm gonna get lucky tonight!'
He couldn't help grinning as he bent over and signed. This was great! His erection
"Well, if you're going to sign Lori's ass, you can sign mine too! But I want you to write something."
"What's that?"
"Thanks, Susie."
Jacob's grin grew wider and his boner throbbed. 'This is getting better!'
Susie wasn't wearing panties: she was wearing a hot pink and shiny thong! The cheeks of her ass were perfectly cupped and smooth. His hand shook a little as he wrote out, "Thanks, Susie," just above her thong.
"Did you sign your name?" Susie asked while remaining bent over with Jacob behind her.
"Oh, sorry. I'll have to move your thong out of the way."
"You're wearing a thong?" Lori asked. "Let me see!"
Lori stood next to Jacob and viewed Susie's ass. "Those are nice. You didn't tell me you had those!"
"You would have wanted to borrow them! That's why!"
"Here!" Lori ordered as she pulled down Susie's panties. "First name right here!" and pointed to the middle of one of Susie's cheeks.
'This is great!' Jacob thought as he signed his name.
"And here!" As Lori pointed to Susie's other cheek.
Jacob had a full erection now as he happily finished signing his name. "Why did you want me to write 'thanks' on you?"
Susie stood up with a mischievous smile and looked Jacob straight in his eyes. "I just broke up with my boyfriend and wanted to send him a photo of what he isn't getting."
Both Jacob and Lori laughed.
"Wow, that got a reaction from you," Susie stated, looking at Jacob's erection. "You're not used to signing asses of fans, are you?"
"Un, no. This was actually my first time that anybody asked for my autograph. I won't forget this!"
"You're going to make your girlfriend happy tonight!"
"I don't have a girlfriend right now. She didn't like the idea of me wanting to be a comedian. We broke up when I got scheduled here."
Lori frowned. "That wasn't nice. You've got talent. You just need practice."
Susie giggled. "Practice makes Lori perfect!
Lori gave Susie a sharp glance before turning back to Jacob. "Well, if you're a virgin at this, is there anything else we can do for you to improve this memory?"
"Well, ah, I don't know. I'm open to suggestions. I really hadn't thought of it."
Lori laughed. "Here's my suggestion. Have Susie give you a blowjob and I'll make sure her ex hears about it!"
Susie laughed this time. "Sure! I was his sex slave and now he's not going to get any more from me!" With that Susie opened his belt. "Ready for the reward for tonight's performance?"
"Yeah." Jacob watched in disbelief as Susie knelt to her knees while unbuckling his belt. His pants came down and then his boxers.
"Good looking cock you've got there" Lori stated.
Jacob didn't reply as Susie licked him from his balls to the tip of his cock
"Tastes good too!" Susie remarked before she slowly took his cock into her mouth.
Jacob's cock slid into Susie's mouth until it hit the back of her throat. She slowly pulled back, licked his balls and slid his cock back into her throat.
"Oh, yes!" Jacob exclaimed. The night kept getting better and better.
"You're getting lipstick all over his cock!" Lori exclaimed, laughing. "I hope it's organic!"
Susie was licking Jacob's balls but paused to reply. "Strawberry." She took Jacob's cock back in her mouth.
"Strawberry?" Lori laughed. "This is getting better. You never wore strawberry before. Is this another one of your secrets?"
"Maybe. It enhances the taste."
"No! A strawberry tasting cock? You're kidding me!"
Susie smiled. "You want a taste?"
"Susie, you're full of shit! You're not wearing strawberry flavored lipstick. No way you're lipstick would give his cock a strawberry taste!"
Jacob watched in wonderment as the two argued over the flavor of his cock in Susie's mouth.
This time Susie didn't stop at Jacob's cock pushing against her throat. She relaxed her neck, leaned forward, and took him down her throat, holding her breath as she wiggled her Adam's apple. She slowly pulled out and licked Jacob's balls again.
"Taste it or shut up!" Susie smiled in a naughty way.
"No, you're not getting away with that lie. I'll prove it!"
With that, Lori got down on her knees and pulled Jacob's cock away from Susie. She ran her tongue up and down Jacob's large, firm cock before taking him in her mouth."
"Damm you, Susie, you weren't lying. You win dinner again! Bitch!"
Jacob was about to cum to a fantastic night when he heard the door open and saw Barbara standing there.
"GET A ROOM! THIS ISN'T A TITTIE BAR!" Barbara yelled, her face red with anger.
Both Susie and Lori quickly stood up while Jacob pulled his pants up.
"Sorry," Jacob stammered as Barbara slammed the door.
"Let's go get a room," Susie asked. "Lori's buying tonight!"
"Bitch! I'll get you next time," Lori shook her head to Susie's laughter.
Jacob followed them happily. This night was getting better and better.
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