Preacher s Sinful Daughter Chapter 5 Sinning with a Woman
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The Sin Of Murder free porn video
Please, if you haven't already, check out the first entry into my "Sinful" series here:
https://xhamster.com/stories/the-original-sin-9913625
Fair warning, the following story has highly offensive material for those with(out) good tastes :P lol if you are at all thin-skinned, easily offended, or otherwise unsuited for coping with the full spectrum of life, I strongly advise you to click off this story immediately and read some Peppa Pig activity books instead :)
Also, I just want to make it perfectly clear right here that the following views, words, sentences, insults and name-calling found in this story does not reflect my true feelings on people of all ages with physical and/or mental disabilities, and the families of said unfortunate people. This is just purely my creative expression on how I believe God, of the monotheistic Abrahamic religions, must surely view people with such disabilities, and therefor is highly offensive, rude, crude, nasty and ugly.
You know you're going to have to buckle your belt tight when a story comes with such a warning! haha :P
With that all said, please enjoy :)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Having been cast out of Eden, and after many years of holy God-approved cold frigid courtship, Eve finally let Adam back into her Garden of Eden, if you know what I mean!
Oh yes, she sure let him frolic around in her pleasant fields of paradise, alright! Sometimes she'd even let him in through the back exit of her garden path, if you know what I'm getting at! Oh yes!
It was the first bit of fun they were allowed to have after angering God so much. Of course, as you well know, any form of birth control is one of the greatest sins of all time, even Adam pulling out and wanking into a sock made God very angry at them, and so Eve was made to carry every child she fell pregnant with to full term, with her having no say on what happens to her body whatsoever.
Their first child to be born was Abel. It was quite a shock for ol' Adam and Eve, when they saw for the first time this weird long rope made of flesh attached by the belly of Abel to Eve. God had to explain to them to cut that fleshy connection, because humans are just such stupid creatures who constantly need telling what to do by a higher authority throughout their entire lives. And then the dumb idiots were extremely perturbed by the resulting belly button that formed on Abel. They deemed it as sinful to look at as a woman's nipple, and thus was forced to cover it up in public until at least 1946 AD, and even then that was only allowed at a beach or a swimming hall for only the most hussiest of hussies to reveal.
The next child to be born was Cain. There was something rather off about Cain...
In time, the young children grew to adult age. God watched over them the whole time, and was extremely pleased by just how hot and hunky of a man Abel grew into. Like, seriously, Abel- phew! What a hunky dreamboat! Such a perfect man. He was just everything a man should be. God looked upon his broad oily pecs and, whilst touching Himself, thought to Himself, "If only you had been my first creation of man, I'd have let you stayed in the Garden of Eden forever!"
Cain, however... Well... Cain was special in his own way.
He couldn't count their flocks of sheep without falling asleep after "3". Granted, he couldn't actually count higher than 5, but still. He had an harelip. His skull was concave on one side of his head. His teeth were bucked and crooked. He had a hump on his back. One leg was shorter than the other, and one foot was clubfooted. He was very slow in the brain, too. God would often watch over Cain and, through tears of laughter, declare, "Ha! Look at that dumb retard! He's trying to be like a normal human!".
God's words, not mine. I, your humble narrator, am merely just the vessel through which God writes.
God always shone very favourably upon Abel. Everything Abel did was exactly as God wanted. He could do no wrong in the eyes of the wise Lord. So much so, that every year, God would bestow upon Abel a new girl child inside the belly of his mother, Eve, to join his ever growing private harem for use in later years when they came of sexual age, though, occasionally, also before the age of sexual maturity -- it gets rather cold and lonely during those winter nights!
But, ah! We do not like to talk about those girls, because they are filthy disgusting women who are totally to blame for everything wrong that happens in the world of man. They should count themselves extremely lucky to even have a mere mention here, serving their role of baby-making sex objects to men, which is what all women are only good for!
Cain, however... Well... Cain would try his best, but it was never good enough for the Lord.
Eventually, in time, God decided to hold a contest for the two brothers.
"I demand a sacrifice from you both!"
God demanded of them.
"Isn't kicking us humans out of paradise and forcing us to live in toil and strife in a harsh world full of sin enough of a sacrifice already?"
Abel asked.
"No! I demand further sacrifices! And no more of that lip from you, dear boy. You're lucky you have washboard abs, a chiselled jaw-line, and a nice pert round bottom, or I'd have smited you for questioning me!"
God continued demanding.
"Hehhh! God said 'bottom'! Hehhhh!"
Cain drooled slowly with his dopey laughter, which sounded like a low-pitched goat being molested, which often happened on their farm when both Eve and the girls were too sore, or just on their disgusting periods, to carry out your womanly duties to the men's satisfaction.
And so, both brothers sought out the perfect sacrificial gifts to give to the Lord.
Abel brought to God a great big bounty of crops from their fields. God looked down upon this offering, and grinned from ear to ear.
"Oh Abel! My perfect man! How ever did you know that I had just started a vegan diet? Thank you, my dear boy, you know me so well! What a perfect, smart, intelligent, wise young man you are. You are the best. Just the absolute best!"
God praised him,
"I mean, you're not better than me, of course, but, I got to say, you come pretty gosh darn close to being almost as perfect as I am! Now let's see your gift, Cain?"
Cain held his hands out, offering to God a bucket filled with sticky thick creamy viscous fluid.
"Uh... What?"
God cast a very concerned, dumbfounded look on His face at the offering.
"It's bull milk!"
Cain grinned proudly, with that unsettling cross-eyed thousand-yard stare of his.
"Sorry, what milk?"
God questioned.
"Daddy taught me how to milk our bull, hehhhh! Bull has special udder just for milking! Hehhhh!"
Cain started laughing that dopey laugh of his.
"The fuck is wrong with this retard...?!"
God sighed to Himself, and watched with a disgusted expression as Cain then tipped the rim of the bucket to his lips to take a little gulp of the questionable gooey liquid.
"Bull milk tastes salty! Hehhhh!"
Cain laughed as thick creamy goo trickled messily down his chin.
"You disgusting fuck...!"
God had to hold a fist to His lips to keep from throwing up.
"Please be kind to my brother, O Lord. He's not all there in the head. He's special. He doesn't quite understand."
Abel placed a hand of comfort onto Cain's shoulder.
"Maybe I should take abortion off the 'Sin' list...?"
God questioned himself as he eyed Cain up and down.
He then suddenly shook His head and remembered the point of this exercise.
"Well, there's a very clear winner here. Abel your sacrificial offering is the best gift ever! Congratulations, you perfect hunk of manmeat, you! You win yourself another girl child in Eve's stomach. This one is going to be blonde haired and blue-haired, and extremely slutty with a fondness for anal sex, as a special treat just for you in a few years time!"
God winked and licked His lips perversely at Abel.
"As for you, Cain, how about I give you a very special Hertz Doughnut, providing you can swallow all of the contents in that bucket of yours, in less than 30 seconds!"
God challenged him.
"Hehhhh! I'm going to turn my poo white! Hehhhh!"
Cain laughed, and proceeded to down the entire buckets worth of bull semen in half the time.
He wiped the sticky messy goo off his cleft lips with the back of his wrist after he was done gulping the salty cream down, and then God reached a mighty hand down from the heavens, and slapped Cain hard upside the head.
"Hurts, don't it?! Haaaa ha-ha-ha! Got you good, you retard!"
God laughed mockingly at him, and then disappeared into the heavens to prepare food in His kitchen for His pet T-Rex.
Suddenly, Cain started going ape-shit. Screaming loudly, red in the face, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"Oh no! God touched his ear! He doesn't like his ear being touched! Oh fuck, no! Oh fuck!"
Abel started panicking loads, and took off running through the fields, as Cain gave chase after him.
With a trowel in hand, Cain caught up to Abel, and whilst screaming incoherently and high-pitched, plunged the sharp edge of the trowel into the side of Abel's head. He continued screaming in tears, as he beat Abel to death with the trowel.
After he was done, Cain's tears stopped, and after a long pause, he started laughing that dopey laugh.
"Hehhh! Abel sleep on the job! Hehhh! Wakey wakey, Abel! Father hits us if we sleep in fields! ...Abel, you tired, huh? Hehhhh!"
Cain started shaking Abel's motionless shoulders to try to wake him up.
"Hehhhh! Abel play games with Cain! Hehhh! ...A-Abel, wake up now, hehh... W-wake up, Abel... Heh... Abel?"
Cain's face began to drop as he couldn't wake up Abel.
"You making strawberry jam, Abel! Stop making jam and wake up now!"
Cain pleaded as he fingered the blood coming out of Abel's cracked skull, and it all began to dawn on him.
"Uh-oh... Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh!"
Cain began to panic, slapping his own head repeatedly with both hands.
A sudden almighty crack of thunder roared overhead.
"OH WHAT THE FUUUUUCKKKK?!?!?!"
God yelled out to Cain.
"Can't I ever leave you humans alone for just 5 fucking minutes without you doing some stupid shit?!?!"
He berated the panicky simpleton.
"Abel sleeping! Making jam!"
Cain tried to explain in his own way through pouring tears.
"I can fucking see that, you dopey cunt! What in the fuck did you do to my beloved Abel?!"
God angrily demanded to know, even though He already knew, for He is all knowing and all powerful.
"Nothing! Abel sleeping! Abel sleeping! Making jam! And sleeping!"
Cain cried out, once again trying to shake Abel awake.
"You absolute, useless, fucking melon!! Abel was a fucking perfect human being! He was the fucking best thing I ever made! And you fucking killed him! You dopey, thick-as-shit, retarded, drivelling, snot-nosed, sponge-brained, shithead, cuntface!!"
God yelled angrily as thunder roared overheard.
"Cain make Abel better! Cain make Abel better!"
Cain dropped to his knees and started trying to scoop the congealing blood pooling around the stalks of vegetation, into the large open wounds on Abel's head.
"STOP IT! STOP THAT! YOU FUCKING FREAK!"
God willed Cain away from Abel's body.
"Look how you massacred my boy! My perfect boy! My perfect man!"
God started to cry as He willed Abel's body down into the dirt to bury him.
God took a moment to compose Himself and dry His manly, heroic tears that in no way makes Him seem womanly.
"This is a fucking travesty, Cain. You killed my perfect man. Oh sure, I could have prevented you from doing that, as I'm all knowing and all powerful enough to see exactly what you were doing at all times and I knew exactly what was going to happen as a result of my fun little contest. But it's you whose entirely and solely to blame for this mess! This is all your fault! And you need to be punished for it!"
God lectured Cain bitterly.
"First of, every crop you attempt to grow will fail on you. Secondly, I shall mark your face, so people know what a fucking idiot you are at a distance, and therefor will be too busy laughing at your stupid ugly face to cause you any physical harm. Although if anyone does murder you, I shall punish them seven times as harshly! Because some murder is 7 times more acceptable than other types of murder..."
God then reached down with a mighty divine permanent marker in His hand, and proceeded to write the words, 'DUMBASS MOTHERFUCKER' across Cain's large-browed forehead.
"Thirdly,"
God added,
"You shall be cast out of your village. You shall go east, to the land of Nod, since you like making people 'go to sleep' so much."
"Waaahhh!!! My punishment is too much!!"
Cain wailed through red-faced tears.
"Ugh, I hate it when retards cry. They look enough like dumb mongoids as it is already!"
God crossed His arms and shook His head disapprovingly.
"...Alright, alright, listen closely numbnuts, stop your blubbering; In the land of Nod I shall grant you one of your sisters to take as a wife. From which, lots of great men shall be born, generation after generation, including one dude who'll earn the achievement of 'Oldest Living Man Ever'! But, quite a large number of your descendent shall also be as dumb and stupid as you are, because, honestly, it's fucking hilarious to me watching severely mentally-disabled children barely being able to breathe let alone live, struggling throughout their entire lives! And it's even more funnier to me watching those mobile enough to keep banging their heads into coffee tables and kitchen counters as they stumble around on their dumpy crooked legs! Especially when their parents have to give up their entire livelihoods and live in abject poverty, and be shunned by the rest of society, just to take care of the little thickos before the invention of a Wellfare State ever comes into existence!"
God chuckled heartily to himself.
"Now go on, spaz, off to the land of Nod with you! Why don't you try to make a city whilst your there? That'll be a laugh for me to watch! Ha ha ha!"
God continued laughing.
And lo, Cain left for the land of Nod to do just that.
9 months later, Eve gave birth to another son, whom she called Seth.
"Gee, that sure was nice of God to give us another son to replace our murdered son with!"
Eve grinned to Adam.
"Yep! Sure was real swell of our Holy Father to do that! I mean, He didn't have to take both of our sons away from us in the first place, and to only give us one new son to replace them both with? But, ah, God's genius knows no bounds, and we must be forever thankful to His kind generosity for taking more from us than what He ever gives back!"
Adam also grinned.
"Thank you, God!"
They both looked up to the heavens and thanked the Almighty with big wide grins stretched across their rictus faces.
And since that day, every fucker on Earth started to bother our dear God with their own requests to receive something back from the Lord, in return for all that God takes from them. Sometimes God is generous enough to give back a little something, from the vast wealth of sentimental riches that God takes from us. And we thank Him every day for His generosity.
And this is good.
https://xhamster.com/stories/the-original-sin-9913625
Fair warning, the following story has highly offensive material for those with(out) good tastes :P lol if you are at all thin-skinned, easily offended, or otherwise unsuited for coping with the full spectrum of life, I strongly advise you to click off this story immediately and read some Peppa Pig activity books instead :)
Also, I just want to make it perfectly clear right here that the following views, words, sentences, insults and name-calling found in this story does not reflect my true feelings on people of all ages with physical and/or mental disabilities, and the families of said unfortunate people. This is just purely my creative expression on how I believe God, of the monotheistic Abrahamic religions, must surely view people with such disabilities, and therefor is highly offensive, rude, crude, nasty and ugly.
You know you're going to have to buckle your belt tight when a story comes with such a warning! haha :P
With that all said, please enjoy :)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Having been cast out of Eden, and after many years of holy God-approved cold frigid courtship, Eve finally let Adam back into her Garden of Eden, if you know what I mean!
Oh yes, she sure let him frolic around in her pleasant fields of paradise, alright! Sometimes she'd even let him in through the back exit of her garden path, if you know what I'm getting at! Oh yes!
It was the first bit of fun they were allowed to have after angering God so much. Of course, as you well know, any form of birth control is one of the greatest sins of all time, even Adam pulling out and wanking into a sock made God very angry at them, and so Eve was made to carry every child she fell pregnant with to full term, with her having no say on what happens to her body whatsoever.
Their first child to be born was Abel. It was quite a shock for ol' Adam and Eve, when they saw for the first time this weird long rope made of flesh attached by the belly of Abel to Eve. God had to explain to them to cut that fleshy connection, because humans are just such stupid creatures who constantly need telling what to do by a higher authority throughout their entire lives. And then the dumb idiots were extremely perturbed by the resulting belly button that formed on Abel. They deemed it as sinful to look at as a woman's nipple, and thus was forced to cover it up in public until at least 1946 AD, and even then that was only allowed at a beach or a swimming hall for only the most hussiest of hussies to reveal.
The next child to be born was Cain. There was something rather off about Cain...
In time, the young children grew to adult age. God watched over them the whole time, and was extremely pleased by just how hot and hunky of a man Abel grew into. Like, seriously, Abel- phew! What a hunky dreamboat! Such a perfect man. He was just everything a man should be. God looked upon his broad oily pecs and, whilst touching Himself, thought to Himself, "If only you had been my first creation of man, I'd have let you stayed in the Garden of Eden forever!"
Cain, however... Well... Cain was special in his own way.
He couldn't count their flocks of sheep without falling asleep after "3". Granted, he couldn't actually count higher than 5, but still. He had an harelip. His skull was concave on one side of his head. His teeth were bucked and crooked. He had a hump on his back. One leg was shorter than the other, and one foot was clubfooted. He was very slow in the brain, too. God would often watch over Cain and, through tears of laughter, declare, "Ha! Look at that dumb retard! He's trying to be like a normal human!".
God's words, not mine. I, your humble narrator, am merely just the vessel through which God writes.
God always shone very favourably upon Abel. Everything Abel did was exactly as God wanted. He could do no wrong in the eyes of the wise Lord. So much so, that every year, God would bestow upon Abel a new girl child inside the belly of his mother, Eve, to join his ever growing private harem for use in later years when they came of sexual age, though, occasionally, also before the age of sexual maturity -- it gets rather cold and lonely during those winter nights!
But, ah! We do not like to talk about those girls, because they are filthy disgusting women who are totally to blame for everything wrong that happens in the world of man. They should count themselves extremely lucky to even have a mere mention here, serving their role of baby-making sex objects to men, which is what all women are only good for!
Cain, however... Well... Cain would try his best, but it was never good enough for the Lord.
Eventually, in time, God decided to hold a contest for the two brothers.
"I demand a sacrifice from you both!"
God demanded of them.
"Isn't kicking us humans out of paradise and forcing us to live in toil and strife in a harsh world full of sin enough of a sacrifice already?"
Abel asked.
"No! I demand further sacrifices! And no more of that lip from you, dear boy. You're lucky you have washboard abs, a chiselled jaw-line, and a nice pert round bottom, or I'd have smited you for questioning me!"
God continued demanding.
"Hehhh! God said 'bottom'! Hehhhh!"
Cain drooled slowly with his dopey laughter, which sounded like a low-pitched goat being molested, which often happened on their farm when both Eve and the girls were too sore, or just on their disgusting periods, to carry out your womanly duties to the men's satisfaction.
And so, both brothers sought out the perfect sacrificial gifts to give to the Lord.
Abel brought to God a great big bounty of crops from their fields. God looked down upon this offering, and grinned from ear to ear.
"Oh Abel! My perfect man! How ever did you know that I had just started a vegan diet? Thank you, my dear boy, you know me so well! What a perfect, smart, intelligent, wise young man you are. You are the best. Just the absolute best!"
God praised him,
"I mean, you're not better than me, of course, but, I got to say, you come pretty gosh darn close to being almost as perfect as I am! Now let's see your gift, Cain?"
Cain held his hands out, offering to God a bucket filled with sticky thick creamy viscous fluid.
"Uh... What?"
God cast a very concerned, dumbfounded look on His face at the offering.
"It's bull milk!"
Cain grinned proudly, with that unsettling cross-eyed thousand-yard stare of his.
"Sorry, what milk?"
God questioned.
"Daddy taught me how to milk our bull, hehhhh! Bull has special udder just for milking! Hehhhh!"
Cain started laughing that dopey laugh of his.
"The fuck is wrong with this retard...?!"
God sighed to Himself, and watched with a disgusted expression as Cain then tipped the rim of the bucket to his lips to take a little gulp of the questionable gooey liquid.
"Bull milk tastes salty! Hehhhh!"
Cain laughed as thick creamy goo trickled messily down his chin.
"You disgusting fuck...!"
God had to hold a fist to His lips to keep from throwing up.
"Please be kind to my brother, O Lord. He's not all there in the head. He's special. He doesn't quite understand."
Abel placed a hand of comfort onto Cain's shoulder.
"Maybe I should take abortion off the 'Sin' list...?"
God questioned himself as he eyed Cain up and down.
He then suddenly shook His head and remembered the point of this exercise.
"Well, there's a very clear winner here. Abel your sacrificial offering is the best gift ever! Congratulations, you perfect hunk of manmeat, you! You win yourself another girl child in Eve's stomach. This one is going to be blonde haired and blue-haired, and extremely slutty with a fondness for anal sex, as a special treat just for you in a few years time!"
God winked and licked His lips perversely at Abel.
"As for you, Cain, how about I give you a very special Hertz Doughnut, providing you can swallow all of the contents in that bucket of yours, in less than 30 seconds!"
God challenged him.
"Hehhhh! I'm going to turn my poo white! Hehhhh!"
Cain laughed, and proceeded to down the entire buckets worth of bull semen in half the time.
He wiped the sticky messy goo off his cleft lips with the back of his wrist after he was done gulping the salty cream down, and then God reached a mighty hand down from the heavens, and slapped Cain hard upside the head.
"Hurts, don't it?! Haaaa ha-ha-ha! Got you good, you retard!"
God laughed mockingly at him, and then disappeared into the heavens to prepare food in His kitchen for His pet T-Rex.
Suddenly, Cain started going ape-shit. Screaming loudly, red in the face, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"Oh no! God touched his ear! He doesn't like his ear being touched! Oh fuck, no! Oh fuck!"
Abel started panicking loads, and took off running through the fields, as Cain gave chase after him.
With a trowel in hand, Cain caught up to Abel, and whilst screaming incoherently and high-pitched, plunged the sharp edge of the trowel into the side of Abel's head. He continued screaming in tears, as he beat Abel to death with the trowel.
After he was done, Cain's tears stopped, and after a long pause, he started laughing that dopey laugh.
"Hehhh! Abel sleep on the job! Hehhh! Wakey wakey, Abel! Father hits us if we sleep in fields! ...Abel, you tired, huh? Hehhhh!"
Cain started shaking Abel's motionless shoulders to try to wake him up.
"Hehhhh! Abel play games with Cain! Hehhh! ...A-Abel, wake up now, hehh... W-wake up, Abel... Heh... Abel?"
Cain's face began to drop as he couldn't wake up Abel.
"You making strawberry jam, Abel! Stop making jam and wake up now!"
Cain pleaded as he fingered the blood coming out of Abel's cracked skull, and it all began to dawn on him.
"Uh-oh... Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh!"
Cain began to panic, slapping his own head repeatedly with both hands.
A sudden almighty crack of thunder roared overhead.
"OH WHAT THE FUUUUUCKKKK?!?!?!"
God yelled out to Cain.
"Can't I ever leave you humans alone for just 5 fucking minutes without you doing some stupid shit?!?!"
He berated the panicky simpleton.
"Abel sleeping! Making jam!"
Cain tried to explain in his own way through pouring tears.
"I can fucking see that, you dopey cunt! What in the fuck did you do to my beloved Abel?!"
God angrily demanded to know, even though He already knew, for He is all knowing and all powerful.
"Nothing! Abel sleeping! Abel sleeping! Making jam! And sleeping!"
Cain cried out, once again trying to shake Abel awake.
"You absolute, useless, fucking melon!! Abel was a fucking perfect human being! He was the fucking best thing I ever made! And you fucking killed him! You dopey, thick-as-shit, retarded, drivelling, snot-nosed, sponge-brained, shithead, cuntface!!"
God yelled angrily as thunder roared overheard.
"Cain make Abel better! Cain make Abel better!"
Cain dropped to his knees and started trying to scoop the congealing blood pooling around the stalks of vegetation, into the large open wounds on Abel's head.
"STOP IT! STOP THAT! YOU FUCKING FREAK!"
God willed Cain away from Abel's body.
"Look how you massacred my boy! My perfect boy! My perfect man!"
God started to cry as He willed Abel's body down into the dirt to bury him.
God took a moment to compose Himself and dry His manly, heroic tears that in no way makes Him seem womanly.
"This is a fucking travesty, Cain. You killed my perfect man. Oh sure, I could have prevented you from doing that, as I'm all knowing and all powerful enough to see exactly what you were doing at all times and I knew exactly what was going to happen as a result of my fun little contest. But it's you whose entirely and solely to blame for this mess! This is all your fault! And you need to be punished for it!"
God lectured Cain bitterly.
"First of, every crop you attempt to grow will fail on you. Secondly, I shall mark your face, so people know what a fucking idiot you are at a distance, and therefor will be too busy laughing at your stupid ugly face to cause you any physical harm. Although if anyone does murder you, I shall punish them seven times as harshly! Because some murder is 7 times more acceptable than other types of murder..."
God then reached down with a mighty divine permanent marker in His hand, and proceeded to write the words, 'DUMBASS MOTHERFUCKER' across Cain's large-browed forehead.
"Thirdly,"
God added,
"You shall be cast out of your village. You shall go east, to the land of Nod, since you like making people 'go to sleep' so much."
"Waaahhh!!! My punishment is too much!!"
Cain wailed through red-faced tears.
"Ugh, I hate it when retards cry. They look enough like dumb mongoids as it is already!"
God crossed His arms and shook His head disapprovingly.
"...Alright, alright, listen closely numbnuts, stop your blubbering; In the land of Nod I shall grant you one of your sisters to take as a wife. From which, lots of great men shall be born, generation after generation, including one dude who'll earn the achievement of 'Oldest Living Man Ever'! But, quite a large number of your descendent shall also be as dumb and stupid as you are, because, honestly, it's fucking hilarious to me watching severely mentally-disabled children barely being able to breathe let alone live, struggling throughout their entire lives! And it's even more funnier to me watching those mobile enough to keep banging their heads into coffee tables and kitchen counters as they stumble around on their dumpy crooked legs! Especially when their parents have to give up their entire livelihoods and live in abject poverty, and be shunned by the rest of society, just to take care of the little thickos before the invention of a Wellfare State ever comes into existence!"
God chuckled heartily to himself.
"Now go on, spaz, off to the land of Nod with you! Why don't you try to make a city whilst your there? That'll be a laugh for me to watch! Ha ha ha!"
God continued laughing.
And lo, Cain left for the land of Nod to do just that.
9 months later, Eve gave birth to another son, whom she called Seth.
"Gee, that sure was nice of God to give us another son to replace our murdered son with!"
Eve grinned to Adam.
"Yep! Sure was real swell of our Holy Father to do that! I mean, He didn't have to take both of our sons away from us in the first place, and to only give us one new son to replace them both with? But, ah, God's genius knows no bounds, and we must be forever thankful to His kind generosity for taking more from us than what He ever gives back!"
Adam also grinned.
"Thank you, God!"
They both looked up to the heavens and thanked the Almighty with big wide grins stretched across their rictus faces.
And since that day, every fucker on Earth started to bother our dear God with their own requests to receive something back from the Lord, in return for all that God takes from them. Sometimes God is generous enough to give back a little something, from the vast wealth of sentimental riches that God takes from us. And we thank Him every day for His generosity.
And this is good.
Lynne
- 05.07.2021
- 23
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