An Innocent Hypnotic Fantasy
- 4 years ago
- 12
- 0
THIS IS NOT A FANTASY free porn video
THIS IS NOT A FANTASY. I was just lying in bed and I had a flash
of something that happened to me that I totally blacked
out and suppressed. I have this cousin that I used to get
high with, sometimes we would run out of pot so we went to
one of his Indian friends house and inhale, something called
Toyal (spelling?) this was something we did often. A few
years later when he and I were hanging out he told me that
he was at this party once where everyone was inhaling Toyal,
one of the guys got so fucked up he was giving everyone blow
jobs and he was ****d by a couple of the guys. I said "that
guy must have been really fucked up and I ask him if I knew
him he said He didn't think I did". That guy was
me. Now I remember being on the floor and crawling around
like a dog and someone was telling me what to do, so I did
everything that was told. I remember getting my ass
pounded by some big cocks and how messy and painful that
was. Also I remember all the cum in my mouth and its taste.
I also remember setting on a guys lap with his cock in my ass
with my back to him.I had my hands on each of his legs while
I bounced up and down on his cock (he had dirty blue jeans
on). When I awoke the next day I had a sticky ass , was covered
with sweat, a bloody ass , a head ache and my under ware was
on backwards but no memory of the night before. I can remember
how strange that was. Now I remember opening each guys pants
and taking out there cocks, how they came in my mouth. I must
have "done" 10 to 20 guys that first night. All
these years I had glimpses of some of what happened that
night, but I could never put all pieces together. It was
like a lot of separate little pieces. For the next week I
had a really bad head ache. Now I can see why I lost some of
my friends during those days. They must have shared what
happened to me with one another or they took part in playing
with the sexual toy they had found. I'm glad I finally
put it together, but I'm really fucked up. I always
wondered where all those little pieces came from because
I never had sex with anyone.....(as far as I could remember).
I must have been 20 years old when it happened. My cousin
never brought it up again. He must have thought I was crazy
not to remember, but Toyal does that to your brain. They
must have kept me snorting the stuff for hours, almost a
total black out. 35 or 40 years later it all falls into place.
I thought those images were from something I that happened
when I was younger 10 or 12 years old with my cousin. I'm
still getting little flashes as I write this down. Most
of the guys that were there were X-Cons. One of the guys had
his girl friend there...she must have watched while I straddled
him so he could fuck me in the ass....also at some point three
young Ladies came over. I ended up in a bedroom and in bed
with them. They must have been between 15 to 18 years old.
I believe one of the girls straddled my cock and I came quickly....she
got pissed of then went to her brother or cousin and told
him what I had done. He was one of the Indians. He got upset
with me and I ended up back in the middle of the living room
tied face down on a foot stool with one hand tied to each leg.
I think at this time they all figured out that they could
do whatever they wanted to with me and I wouldn't mind
or remember. I think this is where I get fucked by those who
had the d**gs, a kind-of sex for d**g deal was made. So I think
this is where I loose track of the order that things happened.
I remember giving a B.J. to a short fat guy and his two friends,
I think he was a d**g dealer. I also remember going down on
a fat lady but no clue what that was about. I believe we went
for a ride with four guys. Here it is months later that I figured
out who these guys were . I gave B.Js the two in the back set.
Then the driver parked the car in the woods and I sucked him
for a couple of minutes. Then he and the other guy that road
in the front set, fucked me in back set of the car. I think
the car was a 4 door beige Olds. These guys were some of my
cousins best friends. It is now clear to me that my cousin
took me around to all his friends so they could get in on the
fun. Sometimes they would come by the house and pick me up
without my cousin. Then they got me fucked up on the stuff
they wanted me to sniff. I can remember going to a party near
the Indians house where two Bi-guys and a girl lived. They
got me high while I was there and they got me making the rounds
taking care of anyone that wanted sex. One of the girls got
upset and called the police. They got me out of the house
and put me in an apartment at the rear of the property. The
police showed up and asked a lot of questions but I was in
the other apartment so by the time they got to me I had my cloths
on and was acting normal. By now I was with 3 or 4 other partiers.
The Cops went around asking everyone what we were up to and
we all said just having a party. After they left it started all
over again. Those
that lived in the front house were the two guys that were
bi-sexual and girl just loved sex. She liked to watch and
join whenever she wanted . I think this is when I sucked the black
guys cock, in the rear apartment.
He was naked, with me on the floor naked in front of him, rubbing
his pubic hair.....thinking how different his pubic hair
was. And another time (it must have been later) I remember
being in a really big old house with a guy that lived there.
He fucked me from behind, in the bathroom while I had my hands
on the sink and again when we were in bed together. I think
he was a d**g dealer also. This guy, I think, is same guy that
I met two years later when I was living with the woman that
I married. I think he was looking for me but he didn't
know who I was or where I lived. I believe he met my wife at
the restaurant where she worked and he must have convinced
her to take him to meet me. When he showed up at our apartment
I had a feeling that I new him. He was with a woman that he said
was his girlfriend. But now I believe she was his sister.
My girl and this lady went outside to talk and thats when
he ask me if I knew him. I think I said no.and then he left with
his lady. (This was added a year after I started writing
because I just put this together now) I believe that my cousin
and his friends traded sex with me for d**gs to this dealer,
so this guy must have shared me with some of his friends.
Some other thoughts keep coming up .... for all this to happen
they must have made me keep inhaling that stuff over and
over again every hour or two. I think that all of this must
have happened over four to eight weekends. I do remember
asking my cousin to take me back to snort that stuff again
but I didn't remember any of the sex stuff happening
to me at the time. I must have spent 16 to 18 hours that first
day with them. As many as 36 hours ever weekend for the next
four to eight weekends. I think I only remember about 5%
of what really happened to me over what could have been months.
I'm remembering more now. I had a friend I used to stop
by and see, years later I stayed with him and he told me he
was bi-sexual. I think he may have had sex with me when I got
drunk and passed out on my bed in the basement. I do remember
waking up without any pants on but still had shirt and socks
on. This was only 16 years ago. I can clearly remember being
in apartments with people and having sex with someone there.
Sometimes my cousin was there but sometimes he wasn't
.I also remember my cousin and I waiting by a phone for calls
in the park near the Indians house. When whoever it was showed
up we went with them so I could have sex with them, he also
had people who would sign up to be regulars, guys that I would
"do" over and over again. So he would pick me
up and get me so fucked up that I blacked out more times than
I want to remember. Another time we went back to my parents
house where we had put up a big tent. My sister and her girl
friends were supposed to be sleeping in it and these guys
wanted to try and have sex with them but they weren't
there so they got me high and took turns fucking me on a old
army cot. The next day I woke up in bed and all I could remember
was that my bottle of Toyal was still out in the tent. I believe
that was all of the stuff I had and would not be able to get
more , so I panicked and ran to check and see if was still there.
How many times did this happen to me? This all has been a really
traumatic experience for me to remember....I thought
that I may be bisexual but I couldn't figure out why
or how I got this way. I'm having a real tough time getting
used to my past. How could I block out all of this for 35 or
40 years and the one that was only 16 years ago? This explains
so many things that I've heard from friends and my ex-wife.
Until now I've been afraid of this side of me. I will
always love sexy women but now I see I'm attracted to
some guys also. I guess I'm what is called a "Bottomguy.
I think I'd like sucking cock almost as much as eating
pussy and I think I'd like having sex with a guy about
as much as I like having sex with a sexy lady...go figure...These
memories have been coming up now for about a year I'm
still remembering more every day. The part that bothers
me the most is that I keep remembering more and more. Now...today
is 2 years after I started to remember. I am now trying to
recover more of what happened during that summer. I had sex with ,
what I believe to be ,
a police officer. He put me on my back, naked from waist down,
then he ask me to put my legs up, he took a hold of my legs and
then put his cock in my ass and fucked me with his balls slamming
my ass, I can't remember much else. My cousin must have
arranged this for some reason. Another time I was with a
few guys and we got trashed, I passed out on the couch face down.
It was a fake leather couch. One of them new about my past and told
the others. He said lets fuck him, help me get his pants off. I was
so fucked up I didn't care. Off went the shoes, pants, underpants
and a quick cock in my ass and another in my face. I took the cock and
started sucking it but I don't know who it belonged to. And after that
one came another one shoved in my face but it was uncircumcised sucked
that one also until it came. Some of the stuff I remember about that time,
but the couch is what triggered the memory because the couch was a
very cold leather. All I could think at the time was that I was to fucked
up to care. I'm still remembering this stuff and it's strange what triggers
a memory like a cold night and a warm
hood of a car or a cold leather couch or person caressing me as they pass me
or someone coming behind me and bumping my ass. All of these happen and make
me feel strange and brings more memories to the surface. It's been a few years
now and still new stuff comes up.
of something that happened to me that I totally blacked
out and suppressed. I have this cousin that I used to get
high with, sometimes we would run out of pot so we went to
one of his Indian friends house and inhale, something called
Toyal (spelling?) this was something we did often. A few
years later when he and I were hanging out he told me that
he was at this party once where everyone was inhaling Toyal,
one of the guys got so fucked up he was giving everyone blow
jobs and he was ****d by a couple of the guys. I said "that
guy must have been really fucked up and I ask him if I knew
him he said He didn't think I did". That guy was
me. Now I remember being on the floor and crawling around
like a dog and someone was telling me what to do, so I did
everything that was told. I remember getting my ass
pounded by some big cocks and how messy and painful that
was. Also I remember all the cum in my mouth and its taste.
I also remember setting on a guys lap with his cock in my ass
with my back to him.I had my hands on each of his legs while
I bounced up and down on his cock (he had dirty blue jeans
on). When I awoke the next day I had a sticky ass , was covered
with sweat, a bloody ass , a head ache and my under ware was
on backwards but no memory of the night before. I can remember
how strange that was. Now I remember opening each guys pants
and taking out there cocks, how they came in my mouth. I must
have "done" 10 to 20 guys that first night. All
these years I had glimpses of some of what happened that
night, but I could never put all pieces together. It was
like a lot of separate little pieces. For the next week I
had a really bad head ache. Now I can see why I lost some of
my friends during those days. They must have shared what
happened to me with one another or they took part in playing
with the sexual toy they had found. I'm glad I finally
put it together, but I'm really fucked up. I always
wondered where all those little pieces came from because
I never had sex with anyone.....(as far as I could remember).
I must have been 20 years old when it happened. My cousin
never brought it up again. He must have thought I was crazy
not to remember, but Toyal does that to your brain. They
must have kept me snorting the stuff for hours, almost a
total black out. 35 or 40 years later it all falls into place.
I thought those images were from something I that happened
when I was younger 10 or 12 years old with my cousin. I'm
still getting little flashes as I write this down. Most
of the guys that were there were X-Cons. One of the guys had
his girl friend there...she must have watched while I straddled
him so he could fuck me in the ass....also at some point three
young Ladies came over. I ended up in a bedroom and in bed
with them. They must have been between 15 to 18 years old.
I believe one of the girls straddled my cock and I came quickly....she
got pissed of then went to her brother or cousin and told
him what I had done. He was one of the Indians. He got upset
with me and I ended up back in the middle of the living room
tied face down on a foot stool with one hand tied to each leg.
I think at this time they all figured out that they could
do whatever they wanted to with me and I wouldn't mind
or remember. I think this is where I get fucked by those who
had the d**gs, a kind-of sex for d**g deal was made. So I think
this is where I loose track of the order that things happened.
I remember giving a B.J. to a short fat guy and his two friends,
I think he was a d**g dealer. I also remember going down on
a fat lady but no clue what that was about. I believe we went
for a ride with four guys. Here it is months later that I figured
out who these guys were . I gave B.Js the two in the back set.
Then the driver parked the car in the woods and I sucked him
for a couple of minutes. Then he and the other guy that road
in the front set, fucked me in back set of the car. I think
the car was a 4 door beige Olds. These guys were some of my
cousins best friends. It is now clear to me that my cousin
took me around to all his friends so they could get in on the
fun. Sometimes they would come by the house and pick me up
without my cousin. Then they got me fucked up on the stuff
they wanted me to sniff. I can remember going to a party near
the Indians house where two Bi-guys and a girl lived. They
got me high while I was there and they got me making the rounds
taking care of anyone that wanted sex. One of the girls got
upset and called the police. They got me out of the house
and put me in an apartment at the rear of the property. The
police showed up and asked a lot of questions but I was in
the other apartment so by the time they got to me I had my cloths
on and was acting normal. By now I was with 3 or 4 other partiers.
The Cops went around asking everyone what we were up to and
we all said just having a party. After they left it started all
over again. Those
that lived in the front house were the two guys that were
bi-sexual and girl just loved sex. She liked to watch and
join whenever she wanted . I think this is when I sucked the black
guys cock, in the rear apartment.
He was naked, with me on the floor naked in front of him, rubbing
his pubic hair.....thinking how different his pubic hair
was. And another time (it must have been later) I remember
being in a really big old house with a guy that lived there.
He fucked me from behind, in the bathroom while I had my hands
on the sink and again when we were in bed together. I think
he was a d**g dealer also. This guy, I think, is same guy that
I met two years later when I was living with the woman that
I married. I think he was looking for me but he didn't
know who I was or where I lived. I believe he met my wife at
the restaurant where she worked and he must have convinced
her to take him to meet me. When he showed up at our apartment
I had a feeling that I new him. He was with a woman that he said
was his girlfriend. But now I believe she was his sister.
My girl and this lady went outside to talk and thats when
he ask me if I knew him. I think I said no.and then he left with
his lady. (This was added a year after I started writing
because I just put this together now) I believe that my cousin
and his friends traded sex with me for d**gs to this dealer,
so this guy must have shared me with some of his friends.
Some other thoughts keep coming up .... for all this to happen
they must have made me keep inhaling that stuff over and
over again every hour or two. I think that all of this must
have happened over four to eight weekends. I do remember
asking my cousin to take me back to snort that stuff again
but I didn't remember any of the sex stuff happening
to me at the time. I must have spent 16 to 18 hours that first
day with them. As many as 36 hours ever weekend for the next
four to eight weekends. I think I only remember about 5%
of what really happened to me over what could have been months.
I'm remembering more now. I had a friend I used to stop
by and see, years later I stayed with him and he told me he
was bi-sexual. I think he may have had sex with me when I got
drunk and passed out on my bed in the basement. I do remember
waking up without any pants on but still had shirt and socks
on. This was only 16 years ago. I can clearly remember being
in apartments with people and having sex with someone there.
Sometimes my cousin was there but sometimes he wasn't
.I also remember my cousin and I waiting by a phone for calls
in the park near the Indians house. When whoever it was showed
up we went with them so I could have sex with them, he also
had people who would sign up to be regulars, guys that I would
"do" over and over again. So he would pick me
up and get me so fucked up that I blacked out more times than
I want to remember. Another time we went back to my parents
house where we had put up a big tent. My sister and her girl
friends were supposed to be sleeping in it and these guys
wanted to try and have sex with them but they weren't
there so they got me high and took turns fucking me on a old
army cot. The next day I woke up in bed and all I could remember
was that my bottle of Toyal was still out in the tent. I believe
that was all of the stuff I had and would not be able to get
more , so I panicked and ran to check and see if was still there.
How many times did this happen to me? This all has been a really
traumatic experience for me to remember....I thought
that I may be bisexual but I couldn't figure out why
or how I got this way. I'm having a real tough time getting
used to my past. How could I block out all of this for 35 or
40 years and the one that was only 16 years ago? This explains
so many things that I've heard from friends and my ex-wife.
Until now I've been afraid of this side of me. I will
always love sexy women but now I see I'm attracted to
some guys also. I guess I'm what is called a "Bottomguy.
I think I'd like sucking cock almost as much as eating
pussy and I think I'd like having sex with a guy about
as much as I like having sex with a sexy lady...go figure...These
memories have been coming up now for about a year I'm
still remembering more every day. The part that bothers
me the most is that I keep remembering more and more. Now...today
is 2 years after I started to remember. I am now trying to
recover more of what happened during that summer. I had sex with ,
what I believe to be ,
a police officer. He put me on my back, naked from waist down,
then he ask me to put my legs up, he took a hold of my legs and
then put his cock in my ass and fucked me with his balls slamming
my ass, I can't remember much else. My cousin must have
arranged this for some reason. Another time I was with a
few guys and we got trashed, I passed out on the couch face down.
It was a fake leather couch. One of them new about my past and told
the others. He said lets fuck him, help me get his pants off. I was
so fucked up I didn't care. Off went the shoes, pants, underpants
and a quick cock in my ass and another in my face. I took the cock and
started sucking it but I don't know who it belonged to. And after that
one came another one shoved in my face but it was uncircumcised sucked
that one also until it came. Some of the stuff I remember about that time,
but the couch is what triggered the memory because the couch was a
very cold leather. All I could think at the time was that I was to fucked
up to care. I'm still remembering this stuff and it's strange what triggers
a memory like a cold night and a warm
hood of a car or a cold leather couch or person caressing me as they pass me
or someone coming behind me and bumping my ass. All of these happen and make
me feel strange and brings more memories to the surface. It's been a few years
now and still new stuff comes up.
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