Careful 3 -- Steve free porn video

This is Steve's version of events described by Mrs Anyonamrs from Jennifer's point of view in "Jennifer's Story 3," posted earlier. See also the earlier chapters posted by Miss Anyonamiss and Mrs Anyonamrs. Careful 3 -- Steve by Miss Anyonamiss That night I slept a sound and contented night sleep. When I woke, it took a moment for me to remember I still had "breasts" and was wearing a night gown. I rolled over and looked at Jennifer; she was lying on her back just staring at the ceiling in our bedroom. After a few moments she looked at me. I could see what seemed to be disappointment in her eyes. "Good morning Jen," I said as I reached out and took her hand. I still loved her, maybe now more than ever, despite everything. "Thanks," I added. She did not reply. She simply looked into my eyes with a loving but questioning look on her face. Her aggressive attitude from the night before was completely gone, replaced by uncertainty. As I looked at her I was reminded of my incredible love for her. I knew in my heart I had lost a part of her, the lover I had known in the early years of our marriage. This part had been replaced by the sexy aggressive lover I had known for the last few months. But the part of her I worried most about, my best friend, was still here. I knew I had to keep that relationship with her no matter what. I moved my hand from her hand to her arm. I was afraid she was going to turn and leave me. "I'm sorry," was all I could manage. She continued to stare at me with the uncertain look on her face. After a moment she tried to move away from me but I wrapped my arms around her. I wanted to hold her, to comfort her. I wanted her to know I was still the same man she'd loved before. "Please Jenn," I begged her not to reject me. She allowed me to hug her but she did not return the embrace. We stayed that way for a few long moments and my head began to spin with all the things I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know how much I loved her. I wanted her to forgive me for wanting to dress like a woman. Part of me wanted to pretend that the last year had never happened, but another part wanted her to accept me as I was. "Its time for us to get up and have breakfast," she said after a while, breaking my thoughts. "Please forgive me," I said trying to pull her back to me. "We can talk over breakfast," she said as she firmly pulled away from me. We got out of our bed; I was still wearing her nightgown and panties. I again became worried she was repulsed by the sight of me. I wanted to get them off. I wanted to talk to her as myself. I began to remove the nightgown when she stopped me. "Stay like that, I'll get your robe," she said softly. I immediately looked up at her in surprise. She moved through the bedroom and came back an offered me her robe. I put it on thinking now was not a good time to argue. As we walked to the kitchen I composed my self. I wanted to tell her how sorry I was and ask for her forgiveness. I knew from some of our problems in the past that she would forgive me and we could move on. The important thing was for me to be contrite. I sat down at the kitchen table and watched her make the coffee. She was wearing my robe but she still looked incredibly sexy. I thought back to the previous night. She had been so aggressive, so in control. I remembered the look on her face when I took her picture. There was no doubt that she had changed. I wondered if things would ever be the same between us. At the same time I noticed sadness in her manner. Her movements and her facial expression were almost mournful. I wondered if she was grieving the loss of her marriage, or was she grieving the loss of me, the husband she had thought she knew so well. Her gaze avoided mine as she brought me the coffee and sat down across from me. We each took a thoughtful drink before I spoke. "I am sorry," I said. "What for?" she asked, she was still avoiding my eyes. I looked down before replying," For starting all of this, and not trying to stop you from sleeping with Rob." "Oh," was all she said. "Jenn, please forgive me," I said. "Punish me if you want but please forgive me," I continued. I was sure this would soften her. She had already punished me by sleeping with Rob and telling him about my secret. "Punish you," she replied, the tone of her voice took on and edge I had not expected. She had gone from sad to perturbed in a way I had not seen before. "Like, a naughty little boy? Stop your pocket money?" she said. This was not going as I thought. I was again on the defensive. I thought she would have sympathy on me. I thought she would have thought that I had been punished enough. "Or do you mean no sex for a month," she said. The volume of her voice was rising. I looked up; she was looking directly into my eyes now. "Sorry, we've done that one," she continued. A slight smile crossed her lips. "Or perhaps when I send that picture of you to Rob I could include all the others and you can explain to him about the ones you took of me. That would be an interesting punishment," she said. A chill went through my spine. I had really hoped that she was not serious about sending any pictures to Rob, much less all of them. I reached for her hand. "No, you can't do that," I pleaded. "Why not, I think it would be very appropriate, and I could talk to Rob afterward. I am sure Rob would love to know why you took those pictures of me," she said. I could not believe what I was hearing. I thought we could just keep everything between us, but she seemed intent on bringing Rob back into this. Why? I wondered for a moment, had they been talking about me for the last few months? "Please Jenn, don't ask me to do that," I took a deep breath and continued, "I won't talk to Rob about the photos of you, you can't ask me to do that." I was close to hyperventilating. "Well you don't seem very sorry, the first thing I propose as a punishment you say no to." She said, her voice had softened a little. She now seemed like she was trying to convince me of something rather than yelling at me. "Oh well then," she said as she rose from the table and moved around behind me. "You can't be feeling very sorry can you?" she softly whispered in my ear. The warmth of her breath excited me. "Or do you really want me to tell you how exciting it was with Rob?" I was shocked. The image of Rob and Jennifer kissing on our sofa flashed in my mind. "Jenn,, I really am sorry, I need to be punished but it needs to be something I feel is a punishment," I said. As soon as the words come out I realized they sounded strange. The truth was I wanted to hear about her night with Rob, but I did not want her to tell me in a vindictive, punishing way. I wanted her to tell me about it as a friend. Honestly I had thought a lot about her night with Rob. The husband in me was more than a little jealous and angry about it, but there was another part of me that felt differently. Part of me wanted to be her friend, just her friend. I wanted to be someone who could listen to her story, and be glad for her. Glad that she had a new lover, a lover that had awakened new feelings within her. Someone who had brought out the woman in her. This part of me was now driving my thoughts. I wanted to feel feminine when she told me. I did not want my masculine jealousy to be part of it. Her hands slid down my body and gripped my new breasts. I felt the tug against the skin on my chest. My heart was racing as whispered in my ear again. "And telling you how good it was with Rob would not be a punishment?" she asked. I tried to formulate a response but she spoke again before I could get it out. "Well how about a spanking for my Girly man?" she asked. I could not believe she asked me that. An image of one of my childhood spankings flashed in my mind. "But that is for children," I weakly responded. "No it is for all naughty people," she said. I was at a loss. "No," I said, "that would be too humiliating." How could I agree to being spanked? She let go of me. "You're not serious about being sorry, you just want to make yourself feel good, I am going to get dressed," she said. I watched as she left the kitchen and went to the back of the house, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I sat in disbelief for a while. I wondered what had just happened. I thought after last night she would want to end all of the strife we had been going through, but today she seemed intent on continuing to make me pay for what I had done. I wondered, did she really want to spank me? I had read some things in the past about erotic spankings but I had never imagined Jennifer wanting to do such a thing. I realized that there had been some things going on with her that I was clueless about. I put my head in my hands and thought about the future. Would she really send the picture or pictures? I realized that I could no longer predict what Jennifer would do or how she would react. To my surprise the thought excited me. For some reason, I felt a comfort in not knowing what she would do. Had our marriage gotten that boring, that I would relish her new unpredictability? The sound of the phone ringing interrupted my thinking. I got up to get it, but it only rang twice. I went to the phone anyway and checked the caller ID. It was my mother. She was probably just checking to see when we would be picking up the children. I was relieved when I saw her number. In the back of my mind I was worried that it was Rob, calling to see how my big night went. I wondered if she had told him the date. I sat back down in the kitchen and finished my coffee. I thought about my statements earlier about being punished. Why had they come out? Did I really want to be punished? My thoughts turned to some of the events of the last few months. I thought about the look on Jennifer's face the morning after she slept with Rob. I thought about the month that she denied me sex and how she had gotten dressed in front of me, watching my reactions and seemingly relishing my frustration. I realized that for the last few months she had been subtly cruel to me and had obviously enjoyed it. I also realized that strangely enough I had also enjoyed it. After a while my thoughts turned to my current predicament, I was still wearing women's clothing with painted nails and breasts. How would I get myself cleaned up and presentable when I had to pick up the children soon? I went to the kitchen and began cleaning up the coffee mugs. I heard Jennifer's footsteps in the kitchen but I did not look up. I was still unsure of myself. I did not know what to expect from her. "Your reprieve has been cancelled. Your mother wants to take the children out to lunch so you're not picking them up until late afternoon. We have all morning to discuss your punishment." She said in a manner of fact tone. A shiver went up my spine. I had been hoping to get cleaned up and have a chance to regroup before Jennifer and I went any further. Her hands cupped my bottom and gave it a loving squeeze. "What is the matter, nothing to say," she said. I really did not have anything to say, but the same relaxed feeling came over me. The same feeling I had experienced the night before. "Turn and look at me," she said. Her voice was calm and very self assured. I turned to look at her. My eyes traveled from her head to her feet. She was wearing heavy make up that made her face look very cold and calculating. Her lips were a deep red that was accentuated by a rather pale foundation. The contrast was striking, almost like a geisha, but there was enough difference to make her look in charge rather than subservient. The top was a jacket that was buttoned low enough to show her beautiful breasts, the tops of which were visible because she was not wearing a blouse. She also wore a tight black skirt which came to just above her knee. Finally my gaze settled on her legs and feet. She was wearing black stockings and a pair of black high heels which gave her posture a very imposing presence. For a second, time stood still for me. In front of me was my wife, but she now the woman of my fantasies. Before this moment the two were separate, but now they were one. The clothes made the difference. I was nervous. There is a level of comfort for a man when he has fantasies but no real way of living them. His mind can take him in and out of them at his free will, but now, for me, fantasy and reality had merged. I had no easy escape. "Come here," she said after a moment. I took a step towards her and she reached out and pulled me close. Our bodies came together. We seemed to fit this way, her holding me while her hands reached for my bottom, gently caressing it over the silky material of the robe and my panties. "Would you like to wear a sexy, feminine pink dress for the rest of the morning?" she asked. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close. "Then I can give you a spanking as your punishment," she continued. I would like to say I was surprised but I expected it after our morning conversation and her outfit. I held her for a few minutes, not really knowing how I should react. "Go shave and shower but do not wet your hair," she said. I still felt paralyzed and I did not immediately follow orders. Simply put I was scared of what this might mean. Would allowing her to spank me change our whole relationship? "Please don't do this Jenn," I said. It was token resistance. I knew I had made this. "You're the one who feels you should be punished, you cannot make up your mind about which punishment so it's only right I should choose. But if you prefer talking to Rob..." she said. But I released my grip at the mere mention of speaking to Rob. I immediately walked to the bathroom. I was in a daze as I shaved and showered. I recalled some of my past fantasies. I wondered if I could really handle them in the real world. Jennifer was waiting in our guest room for me when I finished. She handed me a beautiful pink bra and panty set. I put them on, it was much easier than the night before. She told me to wear my present from Rob again. I put on the garter and this time I did not need help with the stockings. I loved the luscious feeling of sliding them up my legs. The pleasure was actually enhanced by the knowledge of how they came into my life. Jennifer took a few minutes fixing my hair and applying fresh makeup to my face. I really enjoyed the attention. I tried to study her as she worked on me. Her face told me that she was doing this as a reflex and her mind was elsewhere. Finally she gave me the once over and moved to the closet in our guestroom. When she emerged she was holding a reddish pink cocktail dress. I remembered several nights in the past caressing her body while she wore it. I even remembered when she first wore it. She was worried that it made her look heavy, but I just remember thinking how great she looked. Now she was unzipping it and holding it open for me. I stepped into it. The feeling was incredible as she pulled it up my body and I felt it begin to conform to my body. I put my arms though the thin straps and she moved around behind me and zipped it up. It felt great. It was a little loose around my chest but it fit snugly across my midsection. The shirt hung about midway down my thigh and I loved the feeling of it resting against my stockings. "Stay here until I call you into my bedroom," she said and left me alone with my thoughts. "My" bedroom, the statement echoed in my head. I knew it meant that she was now in charge of our sex life. Anything that went on in the bedroom would be her choosing. I just hoped everything that went on in there would be with me. I turned my gaze to the mirror. I looked at my image for a few minutes. I was thrilled at what I saw. The dress was much sexier than my outfit from the previous evening. I looked very refined and sexy. I quickly realized I needed some shoes. I noticed the shoes I had worn the previous night were in the corner. Jennifer must have put them there but forgot to have me put them on. I slipped my feet into them and walked in front of the mirror. I was still very excited by my image but I began to be more critical of my appearance. I realized that the reason the dress felt so snug in the middle was because I had a slight paunch on my midsection. Even though I kept myself in reasonable shape I still had some love handles. I made a mental note that I would try to drop a few pounds and do some abdominal exercises. The other flaw that drew my attention was the shoes. The flat sandals I was wearing just did not look right with the dress. I realized that if I had seen a woman who looked like I did now I would have been disappointed that she was not wearing sexier shoes. I realized I needed some pumps to go with the outfit. Something went off in my brain. I realized I was evaluating myself based on what would be attractive to a man. Did I really care how a man would perceive me or was this just how a woman would think? I knew this was a significant question that I would need to answer but I knew the clock was ticking. Jennifer could call me at any moment. I sat down on the bed and tried to prepare myself for when she did. I knew she intended to spank me and I was willing to let her do it. However, there was still something in me that wanted to escape. Even though I was sitting there in a pink dress there was some machismo in me. This part of me was fighting to the end. Despite the fact that I had made up my mind to submit to Jenn, I knew this part of me would fight the little things, like how she did them, when and where. I smiled a little. I was glad I had this masculine part still in me, it made me feel whole. I was not a woman in a man's body, just a man who needed more. Finally she called to me from the bedroom. I slowly walked to the bedroom and opened the door. As I entered I looked around quickly. It was very neat and the only thing I noticed out of place was our stool placed at the foot of our bed. I also notice that there was nothing of mine visible in the room. I thought back to her earlier reference to "her bedroom." I knew she wanted to make me feel like and outsider in her personal place. Jennifer was standing rigidly in the center of the room. I inhaled deeply when I saw her. She looked so wonderful. Her body was made for the suit she was wearing. It seemed to accentuate all of her curves. She stared at me with an expectant look on her face. "Pease Jenn, don't do this in here," I said. It was my last shred of male ego protesting. "Why not here? I think it fitting that you should be punished where you let Rob sleep with your wife." She said. Her comment cut me right where she knew I was most sensitive. "No," I whispered. I was not sure if she even heard me. My eyes followed her as she loosened her jacket and sat down on the stool. Her skirt rode up on her stockings and I just wanted to fall at her feet and caress her legs. "Come here girly," she said. I moved in front of her, my eyes were focused on her sexy legs and feet. ""Not there silly, by my side so that you can come across my knee." She said. "No Jenn, this has gone far enough," I said. Deep down I knew I did not really mean the statement but I wanted her to tell me how far we needed to go. "So you're not really sorry?" she asked "Yes, I am but this is so demeaning. Can't you punish me some other way?" I asked. What I really wanted to know was if this was something she really wanted, or was she trying to play a role. "I gave you an alternative but you said a definite no to that. However if you have another punishment to suggest let's hear it." I could not think of anything that I thought might satisfy her and I definitely did not want to be denied sex again. "Right. Stop wasting time and get across my knee now." she said. I was done arguing. I took a deep breath and lowered myself on her lap. The warmth of her body felt wonderful. The feeling of my stocking rubbing against her as she situated me felt incredibly erotic. I gasped as her hand touched my leg just below the knee. It traveled slowly in a caress up my leg until she found the bottom of my dress and she lifted it exposing my panties. "From now until I tell you to move, your hands are to remain firmly on the floor. If you try to cover your bottom you'll get another spanking. Do you understand?" she asked, but it was more of an order. I felt her body shift below me. The shift was one of excitement rather than her simply trying to get comfortable. Her hand pulled at the waistband of my panties and I felt them ride up on my ass. I felt the carpet beneath my hands when the first blow fell. The feeling was strange but it was definitely pleasurable. I felt a mild sting and at the same time I could feel my blood begin to flow below my waist. My mind told me this was something I could handle and I began to get an erection. Se smacked me again. It was a little more forceful than the last but it aroused me none the less. More blows followed, each one slightly firmer than the last. I found there was a point were the spanking stopped being sensual and began to be painful. When I crossed this threshold I again told her I was sorry. My body began to instinctively try to avoid her hand and I felt like I was writhing in her lap. Fortunately she stopped, and I felt my body relaxed against her. "Thank you Jennifer," I said. I was thanking her both for the spanking and for stopping when I felt I had reached my breaking point. Her hand began pulling down my panties. "Oh no, that was just your warm up, true spankings are delivered on the bare bottom," she said breathlessly. I could not believe she wanted to give me more. She giggled a little at my situation. "Lift your bottom," she said firmly. I did not move. I knew the next part would be painful, not sexy, and I hoped she would think better of it. Unfortunately I was simply strengthening her resolve by fighting her. "No Jennifer, that's enough," I begged. "Now, now Girly," she said. "Don't be naughty or I shall have to find something harder to spank you with." "No," I said, "What?" "I shall go and get a wood mixing spoon from the kitchen," she snapped. "Lift. Or do you want me to go to the kitchen?" I raised my buttocks off of her and allowed her to lower my panties. She stopped as they came to rest on the clips of my garter belt. I was very worried about how hard she would spank me but her next movement seemed to calm me. I felt her body shudder slightly. It was barely noticeable but I knew then that, whatever her other reasons, she was spanking me for her pleasure. In the past I had always worried that sex was just for me, that she really did not enjoy it. However, now I knew she was really enjoying what she was doing. Even if the act caused me pain I told myself I would endure it for her. She began again. Tolerable at first, but it quickly grew to a very painful series of smacks. My fingers clawed at the carpet trying to find something to hold on to. I clenched my teeth. These were all futile attempts to convince myself that I could take it. Finally my mind gave in and I accepted the pain. My eyes filled with tears and I sobbed just slightly. This act in itself relaxed me. Could it be that the pain was all in my mind? It was as if once I gave myself to her the pain subsided. Each strike now felt like an affirmation of my new position in Jennifer's life. Finally she stopped. "Get up," was all she said. I rose from my prone position. My hands moved to sooth my tender buttocks. "Don't you dare touch your bottom," she said quickly reprimanding me. She reached behind me and I felt her tuck my dress in a position that left my ass still exposed. I realized my panties were still bunched around my upper thighs. "Go and stand in the corner with your hands on your head," she commanded. It took a minute for her words to register. "Do we have to start again?" her voiced was edged with anger. I quickly moved into the corner and put my hands on my head. "Stay there and don't move," was the last statement I heard from her for a few minutes. I realized she had left the room. I stood in the corner in silence for a few minutes. My ass hurt. I wondered if she had hurt her hand. I could not believe she could hit that hard. Was she really that angry with me or was it the sexual charge that she was obviously getting "Did that feel like a punishment?" I heard her say after a while. I was unaware that she had reentered the room. "Does that make you feel sorry?" she continued. It was obvious that she was pleased with the way she had punished me physically. There was a mocking tone to her voice. I did not respond. "Answer me," she snapped. "Yes," I said. "Yes to what?" "It felt like a punishment." I was trying to avoid any more spanking. "A punishment for what?" she asked. "For starting all this and not stopping you sleeping with Rob." I blurted it out. "But I enjoyed it," she said. I wondered for a second if she was referring to the spanking or her night with Rob, but then I realized she enjoyed both. "Don't Jenn, please don't," I begged. I heard her move behind me, then abruptly say, "Come here." I turned and tried to look at her but I could not seem to look her in the eyes. "Come on," she said. Her voice was now encouraging, but I felt like she was calling a pet. I slowly shuffled in front of her. Her hands grasped my panties and she firmly pulled them back up into place. I felt my body stiffen as the soft material came into contact with my sore ass and my penis at the same time. Her hands held my panties in place just longer than they should have. It was a subtle signal that the panties were on me because it was her choice, not mine. "Why shouldn't we talk about my night with Rob?" she asked. "That's what this is all about isn't it?"" I wrapped my arms around her, hoping a hug would soften her resolve. "Please don't," I pleaded, "you have punished me enough, can't we just forget it." I really did not want to forget it but I wanted to hear about it under different circumstances. "You want me to forget about my night with Rob, while you hug me in a pink dress?" she said. There was an amused sarcasm in her voice. She had a point, the dress and my desire for the dress was what had set all this in motion. "Oh Jenn," was my only reply. I felt her finally return my embrace before moving her hands to the jacket she was wearing. She opened it, revealing her fantastic breasts. I just stared at them while she moved me around onto the bed. She firmly pulled my face to her bosom. I instinctively began kissing and licking them. I steadily became more aroused and wanted to put my hands on her but I knew she was in control. I dared not make any moves on my own. "There, there," she said softly while she ran her fingers through my hair and caressed my back with her other hand. "We don't need to talk about my wonderful night with Rob if you don't want to." The way she emphasized the word wonderful caused my arousal to continue to rise. "Let's just talk about you being punished in a pink dress," she continued with the same sarcasm. I was worried that at that moment I might be forfeiting my chance to ever hear what went on behind our bedroom door that night. I knew I wanted to hear it but I just wasn't sure if I was ready. I pulled my mouth from her breast. "But you won't tell me about your night with Rob?" I asked breathlessly and immediately resumed my tender licking. "I promised Rob I wouldn't," she said. "But I think I could break that promise if I told Rob how sorry you were and how I punished you for it." "No Jenn, Please, please don't do that," I begged. I did not want Rob to hear about my spanking. He knew too much already, and I still wondered if she would send him my picture. I stopped my licking and looked up at her, pleading for mercy with my eyes. Her face was flushed with sexual excitement and her smile was calming. She said nothing as I went back to her breasts. I could feel her body begin to squirm, seeking more attention but I dared not touch any more of her without permission. Her hands began to move over me. My excitement grew as she caressed my stockings. Finally she moved me to a new position on the bed and unzipped my dress. I felt so sexy as the straps of my dress slid off my shoulders and my bra came into view. Jenns hands quickly found the breast forms and she began playing with them, squeezing and pulling them. "Make love to me Jenn," I pleaded. The words were ragged. I felt so feminine, so exposed. I wanted it to be tender. I wanted to kiss and caress her body and slowly remove her clothes. I wanted to hold her and feel close to her. I could only watch as she moved off the bed. Her eyes locked into mine as she took her clothes off in a very business like fashion. I could see the lust on her face, but she seemed to revel in making me lie there with my dress half off. She took her time. As each piece came off of her body she took a moment to fold it and place it carefully next to the bed. She was telling me with her actions that my desires were secondary, she would take me when she was ready and not before. Finally she climbed back on the bed, now fully nude, her glorious body flushed with excitement. She straddled me and ground herself against my pantied manhood. Her hands resumed massaging my bra. "Please," I begged again. This time she acquiesced. She pulled my panties down but not off. I closed my eyes in shame wondering what she thought of the sight of my erect penis springing free of the panties and how I looked with my dress disheveled and my garter belt exposed. I felt her pause for a minute before taking me inside her. I reached up to touch her but my hands were quickly pinned to the side of my head and she grunted and thrust her tongue into my mouth. She held her tongue in me and pushed it to the back of my throat. It almost felt violating, and the sensations overwhelmed me. She had a firm grip on every part of me, and my mind relaxed and allowed her domination to become complete. As she began to satisfy her lust the sensation of her smoothly shaved legs rubbing against my stockings took my breath away. I closed my eyes and just enjoyed it. The sex did not last very long. She satisfied herself passionately but quickly. When it was done I was relieved that she lay beside me and we cuddled for a while. I think I felt as much pleasure in the cuddling and the implied acceptance as I had in the actual sex act. After a while the sexual glow faded and the pain in my bottom began to force its way back into my mind. Earlier my crazed lustful state had helped me block out the pain. Jennifer sensed my discomfort and asked me what was wrong. I tried to pretend that it was fine but she demanded an answer. "My ass hurts, I'm sorry," I said. I did not want to anger her. I was still enjoying just holding her and I did not want the moment to end. "You are supposed to remember a punishment," she giggled. I was glad it was a warm giggle, but there was just a hint of satisfaction in her tone. "I know," I said as I pulled her close to me. The rest of the day passed very quickly. Thankfully Jennifer had only been teasing me about the breasts staying in place for a week. She had a solvent that removed them quickly. I realized that I actually felt a little strange when they were gone. I had worn them for around twenty four hours and my body had become accustomed to the extra weight in my front. There were two things that would stay with me for a while however. First the fact that I was now completely hairless, even my male clothes felt a little odd rubbing directly against my sensitive skin. The second reminder was the incredible discomfort I had on my backside. The pain turned from stinging to a deep soreness sometime in the early afternoon. I had taken a peek in the mirror after my shower and I was surprised at the sight of what Jennifer had done with only her bare hand. My butt was very red and I had several noticeable welts that i was sure would transform into bruises over the next few days. The sight reminded me of the satisfaction I had heard in her voice. Was she really that pleased that she had hurt me? Or was she simply trying to make a point and she was pleased to have made it. After dinner that night as we put the kids to bed I noticed Jennifer seemed very odd. She had been so confident and self assured all day, but now she seemed lost. She was curt with me a few times and said very little as we cleaned up together and tried to organize ourselves for the week ahead. I was not sure how to react and tried to just leave her alone with her thoughts. I was a little concerned because prior to everything we had always talked about our feelings, but tonight I felt like I should just let her be. Later that evening I realized what a toll the weekend had taken on me. I was physically and mentally exhausted. I realized that anticipating the weekend had caused me to sleep poorly for a few nights before the weekend, and that I had gone through the weekend itself on pure sexual adrenaline. But now my mind, body, and sexual drive were spent. I went to bed earlier than normal and I was surprised when Jennifer tried to initiate another sexual session with me. I told her I was too tired. I think this may have been one of the first times in our entire relationship when I had turned sex down. I wondered how she could still have enough energy as I quickly drifted off to sleep. The next day I woke and got ready for work. I noticed that I was very alert and relaxed. When I got dressed I realized that even my male clothing felt sexier against my smooth now hairless body. I wear a suit to work everyday so I was not worried about anyone noticing the change, and I relished the fact that my body felt so different after the weekend. I felt great at work, but I did have a hard time focusing. My clothes still felt strange against my body, and I could not get comfortable sitting down. My backside was still sore from the beating Jenn had delivered the day before. I could still hear her words "punishments are something you should remember." If that was her goal, she had accomplished it. I could not ever imagine forgetting anything that had happened during the weekend. When I got home that night I was still a little unsure of myself and how to act around Jennifer. I realized the balance of power had definitely shifted in our house. How do you act around someone who has seen you at your most vulnerable? Actually, how do you act around someone who made you that vulnerable? I tried to act normal but I found myself going out of my way to do things for her, and to do things for myself that she normally would have done. After dinner I cleaned the dishes, I did some laundry, and otherwise I tried to handle some of the household chores she normally would have done. As the night went on I noticed that Jennifer was acting very irritated and distant from me. I asked her if she was ok, but she quickly dismissed my question and told me she had a headache. I knew that meant not to push her any further and just to let it go. I worried that she was having a hard time coming to grips with everything we had done over the weekend. I worried that even though she seemed to enjoy it at the time, that she had just done all those things for me. I worried that she was disgusted with me for wanting to dress, even more now that she had seen me as a woman. Would she ever look at me the same way again? Would she ever want me sexually as a man again? As I folded the laundry I came across both bra and panty sets I had worn that weekend. I knew the pink ones were hers and I put them away in her armoire. But I felt that the black set was mine. What should I do with them? Should I throw them away? I did not want to ask Jenn so I went to the closet in the guest room were I had dressed that weekend. We both kept our old clothes there, but I noticed three items of hers that were on the left side of the closet, separate from the rest. There was the blouse and skirt I had worn Saturday, the pink dress from Sunday, and another long floral print dress hanging next to them. I realized that she must have selected these as my three options for the weekend. I pulled out the floral dress and looked at it. I was glad that she had not selected this one for me. It was very nice and feminine, but the material was cotton and it did not feel sexy in my hand like the others had. I also realized that it was ankle length and it would not have shown very much of my legs. I wondered if she had not chosen it because she wanted my picture to show as much of my stockings as possible. I noticed that my shoes were placed neatly below the dresses on the floor of the closet, and I looked up to find my garter belt placed on a shelf above the dresses. Next to the belt were the stockings I had worn, folded neatly on top of the package that was still unopened. I know it may seem insignificant, but finding the clothes put away for me like this gave me a huge sense of relief. She had obviously put the stockings and shoes away in a place that was easily accessible. This corner of the closet was mine. I was glad that it seemed that Jennifer had given my feminine side a small space in our home and in our lives. I knew that sooner of later I would be wearing these items again, with Jennifer's permission. The thought gave me a sexual rush. That night we went to bed at our normal time and I wondered if Jenn would want to have sex again. I was rested now and hopeful that she would, but I was a little nervous about how I would act if she did. Did I dare take a more aggressive role, or was I now the passive lover in our relationship? It was not an issue as she simply turned off the lights and went to sleep. She seemed to drift off quickly but I struggled that night. My mind returned to the pictures and what she would do with them. Earlier that day I had checked our digital camera and found that they were gone. A part of me hoped that she had just deleted them, but another part of me wanted to see them. I remembered the topless shot of Jenn, the last picture I took, and how she looked through the camera. To me that picture represented the instant Jennifer changed. A year ago I thought I knew her as well as she knew herself, but now I realized how little I had ever known her. I had no idea she had this sexual side hidden deep within her. It made me sick to think that all of the years we had been together I had never been man enough to bring this out, but it had only taken one night with Rob to turn her sexual attitude completely around. I wondered how long she had wanted to sleep with him. We had known him for years, had she fantasized about him before my confession? How many nights had I disappointed her sexually and she wished I were him? Then I changed direction, was it Rob or was it just other men in general? She had told me the night of our agreement that she did not have anyone specific in mind. This made me feel worse, that I had been such a bad lover she longed for anyone different. Would that mean that Rob would not be the only man who slept in my bed? I realized I no longer knew her limits and I was scared. My mind drifted back to the pictures. Would her sending him the pictures make her feel more connected to him? Did I want her to talk to him? I realized that if I had to share her, Rob was not such a bad option. He seemed to be a committed bachelor so I did not fear her leaving me for him. He was good looking and obviously a good lover. I found myself hoping that he would keep her satisfied so she would not go looking for another experience. I also made up my mind that I would do everything I could to satisfy her, but I knew that it would have to be in a different way. It was too late for me to try to be a macho lover like Rob. She seemed to have been more satisfied with me lately when I took the passive role. If this was how she wanted me then I would do my best to fill that need in her life. Finally I drifted off to sleep. That Wednesday night I could not take it anymore. I had to talk to Jenn. She was still obviously bothered by something and I just had to talk to her. I had to reestablish my role as her friend and confidant. She was on the sofa reading a magazine when I approached her. "What is the matter Jenn," I asked as I took a seat beside her. She said nothing but looked deeply into my eyes. There was a look of uncertainty and guilt on her face. "You don't have a headache, do you?" She only shook her head. I asked myself, why won't she talk to me? I had never had to drag things out of her in the past. "Was it so upsetting for you to see me dressed as a woman?" I asked. She shook her head no. I small wave of relief washed over me. "Then what is it? You were fine until dinner on Sunday," I continued. Still she said nothing and turned her gaze from mine. I put my hand on her leg to reassure her. "I can't help you if I don't know what is wrong?" I said in my most comforting voice. I hoped she would open up to me. I desperately wanted to know what she was feeling. I could not stand the distance between us. "What did I do to upset you?" I asked. My fear was beginning to show in my voice. "Nothing," she replied. Her voice sounded surprised that I had thought it was about me. "What is it then?" "It's me," she said. "Go on," I said, and I continued to caress her leg. Finally she broke down. She told me how she felt guilty about what we had done, and how she had treated me. She told me that she was actually embarrassed about what she had done. I was surprised, I thought I should be the one embarrassed, not her. As I listened I realized that maybe she hadn't changed as much as I thought. Deep down she was still the same person. I found comfort in seeing her with her guard down. I also knew this was somewhat of a turning point. Could I have the old Jennifer back if I told her it was ok and asked if we could just forget everything? Or did I really like my new position. In a way she was now seeking some reassurance from me, that her new sexuality was ok and that I could handle it. The same way I had asked her to accept my desire for women's clothing. I knew that she needed the acceptance the same way I did. "What did you do wrong? You didn't do anything, deep down, I didn't want you to do. I thought you were great," I tried to reassure her. "You can't mean that. I humiliated you, I forced you to do things. I punished you for something that was more my fault than yours." She said. Her face took on a questioning look. "You don't mean you wanted all that?" she asked. "Maybe not wanted, but needed." I replied quietly. My gaze moved away from hers when I said it. I still had a hard time admitting that I was enjoying everything that had happened. She paused for a long moment before continuing, "What do you mean needed?" "I don't know. Something like atonement I suppose." I said. I was struggling to try to organize my thoughts. I paused, trying to buy some time to think. "Atonement for what?" she broke the silence after a minute. I decided to try to come clean, to confess that I had strangely enjoyed the things she had done. "For getting a sexual buzz out of being humiliated, for wanting to be controlled, for getting satisfaction out of being dressed as a woman, for allowing you to sleep with Rob." I replied softly. "So what about me sleeping with Rob?" she asked. Her face was bewildered. "It was painful, but the pain had a bittersweet quality to it," I confessed. "I knew up until the time you went into the bedroom and locked the door I could say stop. A large part of me wanted to but this small, exciting bit said leave it, its very erotic and you'll get your chance to dress in women's clothing. The sight of you kissing him in the back of the car gave me such a very painful thrill it was difficult to concentrate on my driving." My mind drifted back to the sight of them in our car. My stomach was in knots. Talking to her about the experience now was almost as humiliating as having it happen. "You actually got a thrill watching me kiss another man? How?" she asked. "I can't really explain it," was my only answer. She simply said, "Try." I thought for a few minutes. I felt my pulse racing and I felt a strange sexual arousal as I thought about that night. Watching them kiss and caress each others bodies. I noticed that while the images in my mind were incredibly erotic and I was extremely aroused, the message was not making it below my waist. I would have thought my arousal would give me an erection, but the reality was, it was having the opposite effect. As excited as I was, my manhood felt like it was actually shrinking. I recalled my feelings when I was sitting outside the bedroom that night. I had experienced the same thing but my mind was so overloaded I had not noticed it. "What else excited you?" she pulled my mind back to the conversation. I thought for a moment. My mind returned to the picture of the two of them on the sofa kissing. Jenn with her blouse off and Rob's hands moving over her soft shoulders and down her bare back. "Watching you with Rob on the settee after you thought I had gone to bed." Jennifer just stared at me. She seemed at a loss for words. "What... why.... Oh I don't know, I can't follow this. Where does the humiliation come in?" I recalled our conversation in the kitchen that night and how I felt as I walked away. "When you told me to sleep in the spare room so you could be with Rob. I was no longer part of the night." "What else?" she asked. Her voice was coming back to normal. The conversation had turned from me trying to find out how she was feeling to her questioning me about how I could possibly enjoy my role in all of this. I was relieved that we were talking openly again. My words were beginning to come more easily. "Oh in remembering things, watching you sitting next to Rob in the bar, talking to him, laughing. I cannot ever remember seeing you that way. Even early in the evening I could tell you knew where you were going. The look in your eyes showed a confidence I hadn't remembered seeing before. It was incredibly erotic watching you seduce him, but extremely humiliating to know that you wanted another man. I also knew that even if I stopped the two of you, it would not change the fact that you wanted it, perhaps that was the most humiliating and embarrassing part of all. It seemed to shrivel up all my maleness and left me with just a longing feeling." I said. The confession seemed to relax me. "So what did that do to you?" she continued. "It gave me this strangely excited feeling. I feel so passive. You were controlling and dominated me. I had this delicious feeling of being a woman, all vulnerable and exposed, moving with events rather than controlling them." I said. I was not sure if what I said made sense but it was what came flowing from my mouth. I wondered how she would react, but she put me at ease when she reached for me and caressed my leg reassuringly. "Please get me a drink," she asked softly. I went to the kitchen and took my time. I wanted to give her a few minutes to process our conversation. I took a few minutes to think myself. I realized she had enjoyed everything that had happened, but she had felt guilty about what it had done to me. If I wanted to continue experiencing Jennifer's new sexually aggressive attitude I knew I would need to let her know it was ok. I wondered again if I could handle it. I had been ok with everything that had happened so far, but how far would Jennifer go? Was I really ok with her night with Rob? I still wasn't sure about that, but I knew I had agreed to it and it had seemed to be the launch pad for what had definitely been the best sex of our relationship. I knew if I said stop now, I would always wonder what would have happened. I decided to trust her. I went back into our living room and handed her the drink. "So you want me to be in charge, to control you?" she asked. "Yes in our relationships with each other." "And where does dressing come into this?" she queried. "It's what I felt I should be like as a women and it felt good. The clothes felt more comfortable than men's clothes, the breasts and heels made me move differently. I felt deliciously exposed and vulnerable, and I didn't have to decide anything, you were doing it for me," I confessed. I hope she was ok with my answer. "And where did the spanking come into this? Is that what you wanted?" I thought for a moment. Spanking was not something I had fantasized about, but when it had happened I found that it had evoked some strong feelings in me. I also noticed it had made me feel more relaxed in the days following the spanking. "Once again I don't think it was what I wanted but it was very erotic." "How?" "Oh, by being controlled, having little say in what was happening. Once you decided to punish me the only option I felt I had was how, and discussing your pictures with Rob was not an option. After Saturday night I knew that I loved you more than ever and I had to trust you to take us both to where ever. My only wish was we would be together." "You were excited by the spanking?" she asked. I was disappointed, I was hoping for some reassurance about my last statement. "Yes," I whispered and looked away. "Go on. Tell me about it." "Oh no, don't make me do that" I resisted. "Tell me." She said firmly. "It hurt." I blurted out. "Good," she said as she raised her eyebrows. She seemed very pleased with my admission. "Is that what excited you?" "No, it was at the beginning the excitement started. When you walked in wearing your business suit and heels, I knew then there was no way I was going to escape being punished and I don't think I really wanted to." I explained. I paused for a moment before continuing. "When you said you were going to dress me again you could have done anything to me and when I stepped into that very feminine pink dress I felt so soft and docile. I was just waiting for you to take charge of me and you did. When I opened the bedroom door and crept in the effect was immediate. No longer was I the man in there, I was in your domain, the place where you had slept with Rob and I had been summoned to be disciplined." I said. I looked at her for a moment and noted the satisfied smile on her face before looking away. "I think we will keep that dress as your punishment dress. Whenever you are told to put that on you will know what to expect." She said. "Why did you not have sex with me on Sunday night?" "I was shattered. It had been a wonderful weekend but I was shattered by everything we had done. All I wanted then was sleep." "Oh," she said. "It wasn't that you were disgusted with me?" "Oh Jenn, how could I be disgusted with you?" I said as I reached out and held her arm. "How about dressing, is that something you want to do again?" She asked. My heart leapt when she asked me that. I tried to hide my excitement before responding, "Yes, I think I would like to, if we can do it together." "So I can sleep with Rob again, or other men?" she asked. Her eyes pierced mine. She had a small mischievous smile on her face as she waited for my answer. My heart sank. I realized she would continue to hold me to our original agreement if I wanted to dress again, but "other" men? I could not speak. I could not bring myself to verbalize it but I knew the answer. The next day I noticed Jennifer's mood improved significantly and things felt somewhat normal again in our house. I think the only real differences were my own perceptions of our relationship. I felt timid around Jennifer, I felt like I needed to do more things to try to please her. In a strange way I felt like I had when we first started dating. There was electricity in the air between us. That Friday I stopped on the way home and bought her a bouquet of flowers. I wrote a note that thanked her for a great weekend and presented them to her when I walked in the door. She accepted them, kissed me, and went into the kitchen. A moment later I heard her laughing to herself. I wondered why and went in and asked her what was so funny. She told me nothing, and just gave me a hug. Over the next few weeks everything seemed normal on the surface, but I was uneasy. I could not shake her words "other men" or her laughter at the flowers. I worried what she might do. How far would she take this? How many "other men" might there be? I found myself worrying about what might be going on when I was not with her. She seemed fine, but I still felt insecure. Actually I was afraid. During our last conversation I had almost begged for her reassurance that we would stay together no matter what, but she had not given it. She had simply pushed me for more assurance that her new sexual status was what I wanted. It was, but I still needed to know she was ok with me as I was. She had told me that it wasn't that bad seeing me dressed, but she had still not seemed to completely accept it. I wondered if everything she had done was her attempt to break me of it. Was she hoping I would beg her to stop and swear to never bring it up again? Would she continue to push me to find out my limits? Even I wondered what those were. I had fantasized about the clothing for years, and I realized that now that I'd had a taste of it, it was more important to me than I had ever thought. There was something in me that needed the dressing. I was also very worried about the pictures. Did she send them? Would she send them? They were gone from our digital camera. This told me she had definitely done something with them, but what? My hope was that she had simply put them on a disk and would taunt me with them later. I even looked around the house a little to see if I could find a hidden disk, but found nothing. For the next couple of weeks I was in a state of high anxiety. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. I looked some more but I could not find any trace of the pictures. I also checked the caller ID history on our phone and the calls on her mobile phone. From what I could tell she had not made any contact with Rob, but I could not be sure. I was looking for reassurance from her at every turn, but I could not seem to make myself relax. I began doing even more around the house. I was doing dishes, laundry and anything else I could find to make her life easier. I guess I was trying to compensate, or maybe I was just trying to please her, I was not sure. I also stuck to my plan of trying to trim down a little. I was eating just a little less and working out. I was trying not to go over the top but I did do some cardio and abdominal work. After two weeks I was already noticing a slight difference. I was working out for two reasons, first to make myself more attractive to Jennifer, and second because I knew at some point I would be back in the pink dress and there was this part of me that wanted to look good. Our relationship was slowly returning to normal but my nervousness kept me from feeling close to her. Finally something happened to make me feel better. I cannot explain why but it did. It was a Saturday night and I was doing the dishes, which had now become part of my normal routine. Jennifer walked into the kitchen in her black business suit, stocking and heels. She just walked straight up to me and gave me a kiss. She told me to go to the bedroom and put on what I found. I immediately went back to the bedroom. I was worried and excited, thinking that I might find the pink dress waiting for me. When I got there I found my black bra, matching panties, and my garter belt and stockings. There was nothing else. I was excited about putting them on, but I did not want to parade around in them with the kids at home. I went back to the living room and tried to protest. Jennifer brushed all of my objections aside and told me to put them on and wear my male clothes over them. She gave me a slap on the ass as I left the room. As I undressed my anxiety returned in spades. Why was she doing this tonight? I was scared that she was getting me dressed to tell me something. Was she going to tell me she had sent the pictures? Or was it something to do with Rob? Worse yet, had she selected her next lover? My worries distracted me from the pleasure of putting on the lingerie. When I was dressed I returned to the living room and sat next to Jennifer. I began to relax a little as she kissed me sensuously. Her hand moved over my body. "Make me a drink please," she said confidently. I got up and went to the kitchen. I was still worried she was about to tell me something. When I returned with the drinks I sat next to her again. No words were spoken as she began kissing me. As we kissed I began to relax, there was passion and tenderness in her kissing. The only way I can describe it is to say that we made out. It felt like the make out sessions we had when we were dating. My nerves were beginning to subside and I just let her take the lead. I think we sat on the couch just kissing and moving our hands over each others bodies for almost an hour. Finally we moved to the bedroom. She continued to caress me as the clothes slowly come off. Her touch felt so loving. It was a different feeling, being so aroused but not being the aggressor. I could not just take her, I had to respond to her lead. It forced me to be patient but it also increased my arousal as my excitement continued to build. This was different than my dressing before. She seemed to concentrate on my pleasure, on working me up rather than punishing me. She did make a comment about Rob when she removed my stockings, but I was so aroused and into her touch that I am not sure if I even responded. I slept a very satisfied sleep that night. The morning after was strange, I felt a sense of relief and euphoria. It was the first time I had dressed and Jennifer had not humiliated me. There was no mention of the agreement and only a passing comment about Rob. It felt like I finally had Jennifer's acceptance of this side of me. I had an extra spring in my step all day. As the day wore on I felt better and better. I realized that slowly Jennifer had started to accept my feminine side. It had shocked her at first but she was starting to find a way to fit it into our lives together. I realized that I might need to do the same for her. I'd been shocked when she told me of her interest in other men, and I'd been even more shocked when she acted on it. That evening I got some quiet time alone to think while Jennifer watched a movie I was not interested in. We'd had a good day together and I was beginning to feel close to her again. My paranoia was fading. I thought about what I wanted from the dressing. When this all started I really did not know exactly what I wanted, I just knew I had this compulsion to try women's clothing. Now that I'd experienced it, I realized that I enjoyed it but it was not something I wanted all the time. Maybe an occasional dress up session and some time with Jennifer would help me wash away the stress of everyday life. It was like a small vacation from being me for a while. I am not sure why it had to be women's clothing, but that definitely did it for me. I was feeling very good now that I felt I was beginning to come to terms with my cross-dressing myself. These feelings had been there for a long time and I had struggled with them all through it. Now I was beginning to accept them. However, I realized there was something else, something I had not realized before. The feelings that Jennifer's night with Rob had elicited came back to my mind. I had tried to explain them to Jennifer but I was not sure if my words had come out right. I still remembered her words "other men". The thought was both sickening and exciting at the same time. I thought back to how I felt sitting outside the bedroom that night. For the first time I realized that the feeling was vaguely familiar. I knew I had felt it before but I could not quite put my finger on it. I thought back to early in our relationship when we were still dating, then it hit me. I remembered back when we had only been on a few dates together. We were already developing a connection but we were not serious about each other yet. Our friendship was still forming. I remembered a day in college when I was beginning to think of Jennifer as more of a steady girlfriend. It was a Friday night and I decided that instead of going out partying I would call Jennifer that evening and see if she just wanted to get some dinner and hang out. I was still getting to know her and I wanted some quiet time with her. Even though it was early in the relationship we were talking almost every day and we knew each other's schedules, so I was surprised when she did not answer the phone. I remembered calling her several times that night and leaving messages, but she did not get back to me until the next day. When we finally got together again she confessed that she had been out on a date. We had always been open with each other, even in the beginning of our relationship. She told me that when she got home she'd heard my messages and felt very bad. We continued to date after that and it wasn't long after that we became a couple. After a while I asked her about her date, and told her that I hadn't known that I had competition. She told me that she had been out with him a few times before we started dating, but he was definitely not for her. When I asked her why she told me that they did have some chemistry, but that he was only after sex and she wanted a relationship. She also assured me that they had not gone any further than kissing. I remember being happy to hear her say that but at the same time I was threatened by the fact that she'd said they had chemistry, and that I knew he'd tried to sleep with her. I also knew who he was. He was an athlete at our school and I knew he was good looking and was popular, both with the men and the women. As I looked back I remember having the same feeling I had when she was with Rob. Years ago I had chalked it up to jealousy, but now I realized it was more. Maybe Jennifer had settled for me because she knew I was nice and would always be there for her. But maybe she had been missing "chemistry" for years. I was now realizing that maybe we both had been denying certain feelings for some time. Jennifer had been open enough to accept me, and I knew I needed to return the favor. I took comfort in the fact that in the end I knew she would choose our relationship over physical attraction. I was beginning to feel confident in our relationship again, and it felt great. About a week later we were at a sporting event that one of the kids was participating in. Jenn and I were on the sideline watching together. She was dressed conservatively, but as had been the case over the last few months her shirt was just a little tighter and her pants hugged her bottom just a little more snugly than they had in the past. After a while she told me she was going to the other side of the field to say hello to her friend Jan. As I watched her walk away, I watched her walk. I enjoyed the view of her tight bottom. I also looked up and saw that she had turned the heads of a couple of men as she walked by. She talked to her friend for a few minutes, then made her way back to where I was standing. I watched her again as she moved through the crowd. I don't think she noticed me watching her because she made eye contact and exchanged smiles with one of the men who had been checking her out earlier. It was almost imperceptible but there was a differ