Careful 2 (Steve's Story)
Please note this is the second part of the story Careful by
Miss_Anyonamiss. If you have not already done so, please read
Careful first. Meanwhile Jennifer's side of this story is being
wonderfully told by another author, Mrs_Anyonamrs. It is
recommended that the reader also read her side of this tale.
Comments are appreciated.
The next day I went to work, but I hardly accomplished anything.
The images just kept running through my mind, the package, the
note, but most of all, the bracelet and the wistful smile on
Jennifer's face when she put it on. I tried to focus on my job, but
I went though the day feeling like another person. How could I have
let this all happen?
Driving home that night, I knew I needed to calm down and find some
time for myself to do some thinking. I stopped at a liquor store on
my way home and bought a small bottle of bourbon. I was never
really much of a drinker, in fact I had given it up years before,
but I felt like a needed a stiff drink that night.
I can't explain why, but the first two weeks after Jennifer's night
with Rob were not so bad. I was shocked, but for some reason I was
in some kind of denial. I knew it happened, but it felt like some
weird dream that would eventually fade away. The package had
changed all that. Now I realized that everything had changed. My
wife was no longer only mine. I had allowed another man to sleep
with my wife. The bracelet would be a constant reminder of what I
had done. I wondered how much she would wear it. She wore it to bed
the night we opened the package, but I noticed she did not have it
on the following morning.
As I walked in the house that night, I was relieved when she did
not have the bracelet on. She greeted me in the same friendly, but
not loving, way she had treated me since Rob left. It was a Friday
night and we had dinner as a family. After dinner we all spent time
together. Fortunately, this was the one thing that had not changed
in my life. Despite the fact that Jennifer would not allow me to
feel close to her as a husband and lover, our family life had not
changed. We were still close as a family, and I was grateful. My
greatest fear was that this fantasy that I had started would
disrupt our family life. So far it had not.
That night I told Jennifer that I had some catching up to do on my
work and that she should go to bed without me. I waited about a
half hour and went back to check on her. She seemed to be sleeping
soundly.
I headed out to the patio attached to the back of our home. It was
a balmy late summer night and I felt the dampness on my skin as I
sat in one of our lawn chairs and poured myself a drink for the
first time in years. My mind was churning as I watched the half
moon emerge from behind a cloud. I listened to a slight breeze
rustle some leaves. It was peaceful, and the sounds of the night
calmed me. I felt like I had taken a break from the mixed emotions
and anxiety I had been feeling for the past few weeks. My first sip
of the bourbon was stronger than I remembered. I felt the sizzle of
it sliding down my throat, but I smiled when I felt the distantly
familiar warmth when it reached my stomach. Despite how surreal I
felt at that moment, I knew I was at a turning point. I knew that
I was no longer in control of my marriage, but I also I knew that
I needed to sort out exactly how I felt and communicate with
Jennifer. We had not had a real talk about what had happened, only
a defensive inquisition on my part.
I tried to make a mental list of all the questions I had to answer
for myself. Why had I started all of this? Was dressing up this
important to me? Why did I have this longing for women's clothing?
Why did I not explore dressing on my own, why was it important to
me to share dressing with Jennifer? What did I really want from
dressing up? How did I feel about Jennifer now that she had slept
with someone else? Why didn't I stop it? Why did I agree to it in
the first place? Was it really about dressing up or something else?
Finally I realized there was something else, something that had
nagged at me from the first time Jennifer told me that she had
thought about other men. I couldn't quite put my finger on it but
there was something deep in my mind that was driving all of this.
As I poured another drink I decided to focus on what started it
all; my fascination with women's clothes. It was hard to admit, but
I knew that it had started early. I remembered my adolescence, my
first crush, the first time I considered a girl sexy. I remembered
the girls that appealed to me in high school and college. They were
always the girls that dressed in skirts and other decidedly
feminine attire. I had never been attracted to the athletic type,
rather the demure soft feminine women. I remembered specific
clothes that these girls wore and how I fantasized about them in
class. Ok, I stopped myself, was it the girls or the clothes? It
was the girl, but the clothes made a difference. I realized that
clothing could take a woman from average to sexy. The right clothes
on the right woman could give her power, sexual power. Was that it?
No. I did not want power, certainly not sexual power over men. No,
I wanted to feel the sensual feeling that women feel. When a woman
is dressed her best, she looks confident, carries herself
differently, she even smells different. There was something about
a woman who looked great, and knew it, that I wanted to emulate.
So I had come to a realization about myself and why I wanted to
dress up in women's clothes, but I still needed to figure out what
I actually wanted to do. I knew that this desire was only a small
part of me, but still a part. It was a part of my sexuality. Did
this make me gay? No, I knew I had never felt that way. I took a
minute to review my past sexual thoughts; I had never felt even the
remotest attraction to any man. There, I had reassured myself, even
I was guilty of the fleeting thought that cross-dressing had
homosexual implications.
Even when I had made my initial request to Jennifer, I did not have
a clear idea of what I wanted. No wonder she was shocked. If I
didn't know what I wanted, how could she? She must have had all
kinds of possibilities running through her mind. I winched at what
she might have thought.
So, what did I want? There was the nagging feeling again. I wanted
to feel the excitement of dressing, but not everyday dressing,
dressing for something else. I also wanted something besides the
dressing, acceptance. That was it, I wanted the feelings but I
wanted to share them. I wanted to share the feeling with Jennifer
and I wanted it to not just be about me, I wanted to be something
we both shared. I realized I was not getting anywhere so it was
time to move on.
The bourbon had definitely had the desired effect. I was now alert,
thinking. My mind was lubricated and I was no longer held back by
my insecurities. I decided to move on to the question of how I felt
about Jennifer and the changes that had taken place in our
relationship.
I took a deep breath. I knew I should be angry, but at who? This
was not a simple answer. How could I be angry at Jennifer? I had
given her permission and I could have stopped it. I knew I should
be angry at myself, but I wasn't. The nagging feeling was there
again. Why was I not angry at myself? Why did I not wish to turn
back the clock to the night when I agreed to let her
“experiment”? I thought back to our sexual history. When we
were dating the sex was good, but it was rushed. We were always
doing it in secret in different places. I blamed it on the fact
that we did not have time to please each other. When we were
married, before the kids it was still not mind blowing. By this
time I had begun to think that Jennifer was just not a very sexual
person. In fact she even told me that it was not that important to
her. When the kids came, I blamed it on the pressures of
parenthood. But why the change? Our sex lives had improved the day
Jennifer told me that she was curious about other men. Now I knew.
It wasn't the time, it wasn't Jennifer, it wasn't the kids, it was
me. I had never taken the time to be interested in what she wanted.
I was only concerned about my perception of the sex.
Yes, time for another drink.
I looked at my bourbon bottle in the light of the moon. It was more
than half empty. I wondered if my epiphany was the result of the
liquor or the truth. I thought for one more moment. I knew I was
right, but would I have the guts to admit it to Jennifer? I
sincerely hoped I would, and I hoped for......acceptance.
The next day I awoke with my first hangover in years. I clearly
remembered my revelations from the previous evening, but I was
lacking the enthusiasm I had the night before. I went through the
day wondering how I could express my feelings to Jennifer.
That evening I went to our living room to gather my thoughts. I
wanted to talk to her, to tell her how I felt, but I needed to come
up with just the right words. I sat for a long while, staring
blankly at the television running the upcoming conversation through
my mind. How could I have this conversation with Jennifer and still
retain any of my manhood? I was still deep in my conflicted
thoughts when Jennifer entered the room.
When I heard her footsteps I glanced in her direction to
acknowledge her. I quickly turned to face her when I saw how she
was dressed. The same short skirt, blouse, stockings, and red heels
that she wore the night I gave her permission to sleep with another
man. I would never forget that outfit. It now symbolized her new
sexual freedom and my infinite stupidity. The only way I can
describe it is to say she strutted into the center of the room and
did a twirl in front of me. When she ended up facing me she gave me
a withering look deep into my eyes and moved her hand to direct my
attention to the fact that she was wearing the bracelet. I was not
expecting this. I was hoping to be able to initiate the
conversation. I knew I was looking at a different woman than the
one I had known for the last fifteen years. She had never made an
entrance like that before. In one move she had taken me from
determined to communicate my feelings to her, to ready to do
anything she said. When she looked at me in that outfit with her
slight mocking smile, I felt an odd mixture of incredible sexual
desire and complete compliance to her wishes. I don't know if I had
ever quite felt that way before.
All I could manage to say was "Jennifer, please stop taunting me."
I was consumed with desire for her. I still had not had any sexual
contact with her since Rob left.
Her smile broadened as she said "do you like?"
She was teasing me in a way I had never known before. "Why do you
have to be so cruel?" I responded, now totally off balance. All of
my prepared speeches were now out the window. She was in charge.
She glided over and took a seat next to me. She crossed her legs
and her stocking brushed up against my leg. A shiver went through
me.
She looked me in the eye again and said,"I think we should talk
about your sexy present."
She paused and asked "how do you want to be dressed, and what do
you want to happen?"
I had no idea what to say. Her stare seemed to go right through me.
I had to lower my gaze away from her. "I just want to feel what it
is like to dress up like a woman and be treated like one." I
realized this was a vague answer, but to be honest I really had not
reached any decisions about my fantasy. My focus had been on her
and her new found desires and freedom.
She seemed irritated when she said' "Ok, that is a lot of help,
would you make me a drink please?" The words were a question, but
the tone was a command.
I immediately got up and headed for the kitchen. As I poured her
tequila I had a chance to collect myself. I had been working up my
nerve to talk to her all day, but I wanted to talk to her as
equals. As strange as it may sound, I knew we would never talk as
equals with her dressed the way she was, coupled with the fact that
she was wearing the bracelet. At the same time I was glad she was
willing to discuss my fantasy. At least she still realized I had
made a sacrifice and she wanted to treat me fairly. However, I also
knew she was still extremely uncomfortable with the whole idea. I
wanted her to plan my fantasy on her terms. Plus I still wasn't
really sure what I wanted from the dressing, but I knew I wanted
her to call the shots. I took a deep breath to calm down and took
her the drinks.
We sat and talked for a while as she drank. She questioned me
relentlessly as we sat, but I was careful not to set any specific
expectations for what she called "my big night". As we talked, I
slowly began to feel more comfortable around her. We were talking
like we did before all this happened and we were even able to share
a few laughs about it. I loved her and I knew I always would, no
matter what happened. Finally she asked me if I would like to go
look through her clothing to see what styles I would like to wear.
As I followed her into our bedroom she glanced at me over her
shoulder with a sexy smile. I couldn't believe I was married to
this newly created sexual creature.
She slowly showed me several of her outfits and asked me what I
thought. I really liked several of her dresses and skirts but I
made sure not to select anything specific. I wanted her to pick out
what I wore. Finally she opened her lingerie drawer. This was the
part I was looking forward to. I reached for a pink bra that was on
the top of the drawer.
"You know that bra does not go with the garter belt and stockings
Rob gave you," she said. "You should really pick a black bra and
panty set."
My stomach jumped into my throat at the mention of my gift from
Rob. I still could not believe he had done that to me. As a matter
of fact, I still couldn't believe Jennifer had told him about that
part of our agreement. I wondered what other intimate details of
our lives she had shared with him.
"Why does he get a say in what I do," I responded in a low voice.
She ignored me and started handing me pairs of black panties and
their matching bras. I examined each item as she handed them to me
but my mind was fixated on Rob. I knew he had slept with Jennifer
and taken her faithfulness from me, but I wondered what possessed
him to try to make such a mockery of me. What he had done had taken
deliberate effort to embarrass me. He had actually gone out and
purchased something for the express purpose of making me feel
ridiculous. He had also given Jennifer something to symbolize his
new status in our lives. My mind then wandered to the image I had
of him caressing Jennifer's body. My penis throbbed at the picture
I had in my mind. I was snapped back to reality when Jennifer
spoke.
"How about the bra I'm wearing now," she said as she moved in close
to me.
My focus now turned to her. I gazed longingly at her chest. It
wasn't the bra but her breasts I longed to touch. It had been a
long time since I was permitted to touch them, and I was still
unsure if she was willing tonight. "It looks great through your
blouse," I responded and moved my hands to remove her outer
garment. I became even more excited when she made no move to stop
me.
"Why don't you take it off to see it better," she said.
I needed no further encouragement as my hands moved to her back to
unhook the bra. I felt like a teenager removing a bra for the first
time.
My euphoria was broken when she spoke again.
"Rob was the last man to remove this bra from me," she said. It
seemed to me that she emphasized the word "man".
My stomach turned when she said it. I wondered how she could say
such a thing. I tried to say something but I am not sure if it came
out or not. I assumed she wanted to reject me again, so I tried to
let go of her. I was shocked when she seemed to hold on to me
forcefully and began to pull my clothes off. My mind was in a blur
as she quickly pulled my shirt up and undid my pants in a smooth
movement. Images of her and Rob naked continued to run through my
mind. I wondered about his reaction when he removed her bra. Had he
immediately licked her breasts? Had he caressed and squeezed them?
He had just looked at them, triumphantly? Each scenario had its own
humiliating vision in my mind. Again, my wandering thoughts where
broken by her words.
"Come on, Rob couldn't wait to get my clothes off," she said. As
she said it, I gazed into her eyes. I saw a lust I had never seen
before. Was it for me? Or was it the memory of Rob? Her statement
seemed to confirm what I had hoped, that her night with Rob had
been rough, lustful, and full of passion, but not intimate. She
moved my hands back to her bra. As I undid the clasps she told me
to continue undressing her. When she was naked I admired her body
as if I was seeing it for the first time. I was still very nervous
but I felt a lot better when I noticed her removing the bracelet as
we moved to the bed. At least I could make love to her without the
reminder of Rob.
As me made love, I couldn't help but try to give her what Rob had
given her. I tried to be aggressive, but she still maintained
control of the act. There was a mixture of the familiar and the new
in our coupling. The positions were the same but she struggled with
me, pulling me in new angles and shifting her body as if trying to
get me to touch her in slightly new ways. I knew she was trying to
recreate some of the feelings she had with her new lover.
When it was done I felt a relief. I had regained some of my former
privileges. We held each other close for a while then made love
again. There was a closeness and tenderness in our second session
that made me feel like I was welcome in her bed again.
The following day was like old times. Jennifer and I were playful
with each other again. I gave and received several hugs from her
throughout the day. We had a wonderful day together and as a
family. I could barely contain myself. I felt like together we had
weathered the storm and our marriage and love for each other had
stayed intact.
For two weeks nothing was said about the past. No mention of Rob or
my dressing came up. I was relieved. My rational mind hoped we
could continue our old relationship and eventually forget
everything that had happened. Jennifer was the loving wife I
remembered. The only difference from before was the more confident
way she carried herself. I had to admit the change. Since her night
with Rob she acted just a little more self assured. She continued
to dress in more attractive clothing. Nothing over the top, but
either consciously or unconsciously she seemed to button one less
button on her blouses, and she always seemed to be wearing shoes
just a little sexier than before. She also teased me with her body
language and facial expressions. When she passed me in the hall or
kitchen she would lean into me and look me directly in the eye,
always flashing a coy smile.
I was also glad to have reaffirmed myself in our bedroom. We had
regular sex several times; I even initiated it and was accepted. I
was happy. I felt like I had my wife and best friend back in my
life again. All that changed one evening when the phone rang.
I was in our study, finishing up my work for the evening when I
picked up the phone. I had not bothered to look at the caller ID.
"Hey, what's going on?" it was Rob. This was the first I had heard
from him since his package arrived three weeks earlier. I was very
apprehensive about speaking to him. I wondered if he had called to
speak to me or Jennifer.
"Not much, what are you up to?" I replied, it was my standard
response.
We talked for a while, mostly about sports and current events. As
the conversation proceeded I became more comfortable. My hope was
that he was sorry for embarrassing me and was trying to smooth
things over. Rob and I had disagreements in the past and we always
just let it go. My thought was that if I could get through the
conversation without mentioning anything about what had happened
that would be the end if it. I know it sounds dumb, but that is the
way men deal with things. We continued to talk for a while and I
made hints that I needed to get off the phone. Then he pushed the
issue.
"So tell me, did you get everything you wanted for your birthday?"
he asked.
I was floored; he was not going to let me off the hook.
"Well, it is not for a couple of weeks," I countered, still
clinging to the hope he would let me off the hook.
"Oh sorry," he said. "Well I hope you enjoy the gift I sent you."
I had no idea what to say back. How do you proceed with such a
conversation? I tried to change the subject back to sports but he
continued.
"Do you at least know what else you will be wearing on your
birthday? Have you picked out and panties yet? Maybe you should get
a thong." he teased.
We had always had the kind of friendship were we kidded each other
relentlessly, but this was different. He seemed to be making a
direct assault on my manhood. The problem was he was right. I had
no response as he continued.
"You know you should get a bra like Jenn's, her breasts are just
the right size." He said and waited for my reply.
My temper started to kick in. I responded defensively. "What are
you trying to do?" I asked.
"I'm just asking you about your birthday, I thought since I had
played a part in it I should have some input on your big present."
He said. I was surprised he was even willing to bring up the
subject of me in women's clothing.
"My birthday is between Jennifer and me," I said, still pissed.
"Ok, but some of it was between Jennifer and me, if you remember.
I have been meaning to thank you for that. It was some of the best
sex I have ever had. Jennifer really seemed to need it," he said.
"Rob why do you have to act like this, isn't it enough that you had
Jenn? Why do you have to be a prick about it? Do you really what to
fuck up my marriage? It is not my problem that you have never been
able to keep a relationship for long." I said. I was trying to hit
a point with him.
"Alright fine," he said. "But you need to understand something."
"What" I said, my tone laced with sarcasm.
"I have never, not satisfied a woman, and it was obvious to me that
Jennifer was not a satisfied woman until I had been with her. She
told me I had found some very special places within in her that you
had never known were there. You need to try harder to satisfy her
sexually, and I can promise you she doesn't want to see you dressed
up like a girl. She wants a man." He said.
I worried that he was right. Had I ever been a good lover to
Jennifer? Had she tolerated my inadequate love making until I had
pushed her over the edge by asking to cross dress? I was sick at
the thought.
"Listen, why don't I come for a visit on your birthday, you dress
up, and then Jenn and I will have our own celebration, you can
watch if you want." he stated. I hoped he wasn't serious, and he
just wanted to show me how stupid my fantasies were.
I hung up the phone. I had nothing else to say.
I sat quietly alone for a few minutes. My heart felt like it would
pound out of my chest. I had just had a conversation with a man who
had slept with my wife, and on top of it he knew my most secret
fantasies. I had no idea what to do. At first I thought I should
just forget it and not tell Jennifer, but I knew he might call back
and talk to her.
After a while I got up and walked slowly to our living room. I knew
I had to tell Jennifer about the call, but I was not sure how. I
walked in and took a seat on the sofa wondering how to start the
conversation.
Jennifer looked at me. She could obviously tell something was
wrong. "What's the matter?" she asked me. I still couldn't bring
myself to answer her. "What is it Steve?" she asked again the
concerned tone in her voice sounded more urgent. She moved to the
couch and held my hand. The warmth of her touch made me feel
better, somehow secure. "Tell me." She said with a worried look.
"That was Rob on the phone," I replied as I looked her in the eyes
looking for some sympathy.
My heart sank as I saw Jennifer's face turn from worried to
somewhat amused. A small smile crept over her face and she visibly
relaxed.
"Did he give you a message for me or ask to speak to me?" she
asked, I could hear the hopefulness in her voice. I could only
shake my head no.
"Well, what did he say?" her tone now had and edge. I was not sure
if she was angry at me for not elaborating, or angry at Rob for not
calling to talk to her.
My voice was trembling as I replied. "He said he just called to
talk. So we started talking about sports, but then he asked if I
had my birthday. When I told him it was still a few weeks away, he
told me he hoped I enjoyed wearing his present."
"Go on," she said. The slight smile had returned to her lips, and
her eyes were locked on mine.
I tried to go back to discussing sports but he kept slipping in
remarks about what I should wear, like panties or a thong and that
I should have breasts like yours because they were just right to
hold."
I stopped to take a breath. I need to collect myself. I could not
believe I was sitting here telling my wife about my conversation
with her lover. As I resumed my voice quivered with embarrassment.
"After a while he thanked me for letting you spend the night with
him and he told me that he was sure you enjoyed it as much as he
did." I looked at her face as she turned her head and blushed. I
continued, "I tried to turn the conversation back to sports but
then he asked if you had told me about the special places he had
found that night."
She returned her gaze to me. Her face was flushed. I could tell she
was fondly remembering her time with Rob. I could feel my heart
pounding in my chest.
"Well my girly man, what did you say to that?" she replied.
"I told him I did not know anything about what happened that
night," I paused before continuing. "He laughed at me, and then
said he was sorry but I probably had not been allowed to have sex
with you yet."
I stopped for a moment. I did not know if I could tell her anymore.
My mind was going in so many directions. Part of me wanted to just
beg for forgiveness, but another part wanted to give Jennifer some
space to see where she wanted this to go.
Finally I told her the last of it. "He also asked if he could come
over on my birthday and see me dressed, then the two of you could
celebrate my birthday together." My voice trailed off, but Jennifer
sensed there was more.
"And?" she said glaring at me.
I took a deep breath. "He said I could watch if I wanted to." I was
struggling for air as I said the last sentence. "I hung up the
phone while he was laughing."
Jennifer continued to glare at me, "Well what did you expect, did
you want to watch instead of listening outside the door?"
How could she have known that? I was taken aback.
"You did give me to him as a present; maybe I should call Rob back
to discuss this." she said in a very aggressive tone.
"No please don't" I pleaded.
"Why not? I am sure he wanted to talk to me before you hung up, why
don't I call him back. I will put him on speaker so you can hear."
She said as she looked at me.
"I think I will have a drink first," she said as I looked her, she
raised her eyebrows which was my queue to go get it for her. I was
glad for the chance to retreat and try to catch my breath and get
my pulse down.
As I made her drink, I tired to take deep breaths to calm myself.
I thought about what Rob had said and tried to sort out my own
feelings before returning to Jennifer. Rob's comment about letting
me watch stirred something in me. The image of Rob and Jennifer on
our sofa, locked in a passionate embrace burned itself into my
mind. I am not sure why but I became extremely aroused. I
immediately got a strong erection. I tried to turn my thoughts away
so as not to let Jennifer know my arousal. I tried for several
minutes but I could not get the thoughts of the two of them
together out of my head. I realized I could not stall any longer so
I took Jenn her drink and hoped she would not notice the bulge in
my trousers.
I give Jennifer her drink and took a seat next to her as quickly as
possible to hide my embarrassment. "Go ahead, call him," I said as
calmly as I could manage.
"Do you want me to?" she replied.
"You want to humiliate me so go ahead, it does not matter what I
want," I tried to sound sympathetic. I was hoping she would tell me
she would not call him.
"Its getting late now and I know we have a lot to talk about," she
said. I breathed a sigh of relief, but she continued, "perhaps I
will call him tomorrow."
"Oh no," I realized she would not let this go easily.
She reached over and put her hand on my leg. I was hoping it was a
gesture of sympathy.
"Its ok sweetie, when I call him you can listen," she said.
This was not the sympathy I was looking for. I wondered how I could
have let all this happen. I had no idea what to say.
"Did you want Rob to tell you what happened?" she said.
I was still speechless. The truth was I wanted to hear it from
Jennifer, but how could I admit that to her.
"Never mind, perhaps you will hear it when I call him," she added,
twisting the knife. "Do you want to tell me what you think
happened?"
I buried my face in my hands and said no.
"Perhaps you prefer to imagine what happened when Rob undressed
me?" her voice had taken on a low lustful tone. I imagined Rob
slowly unbuttoning the red silk blouse she wore the night she slept
with him. I wondered what thoughts went through Jennifer's mind
when another man saw her naked. I could not stop my own arousal at
the thoughts.
She paused for a moment, "and imagine his hands moving over my
body?" I had never heard Jennifer say anything that way before.
My thought shifted to an image of Rob's hand cupping and squeezing
her breasts. I wondered if he had been gentle or forceful. I could
not take it anymore; my brain seemed to be on overload with the
erotic images of their love making. I turned to look Jen in the
eyes and tried to muster some words.
"Stop, please don't Jen," I begged her for some mercy, some show of
affection.
She reached for my crotch. My complete arousal was obvious to her.
"Are those just words or do you really want me to stop?"
I knew I didn't, but at the same time I was not sure if I was ready
to hear every detail. There was a pain that accompanied the lust I
felt. The pain of losing the woman I thought I knew so well because
of my own stupidity. I had no answer.
She put her drink down and drew her body close to me. She whispered
in my ear, "did you like watching Rob and I making out on this
settee?"
My body stiffened, "I didn't know you saw me," I said.
She gave me a sexy giggle, but a withering glare. "Its time I went
to bed," she said.
I grabbed her hand. I wanted to hold her and tell her that I loved
her but how could I after what I had done? We looked into each
others eyes for a few moments before I got up to lock the house for
the night.
As I headed for the bedroom my sexual arousal subsided, but I still
longed for Jennifer's affection. I wanted to climb into bed and
hold her. I wanted her to know how much I loved her despite what
had happened and what I had allowed. My hopes were dashed, when she
was obviously angry at me for being so passive to Rob. She made
some snide comments to me before kissing me goodnight and rolling
over.
The following few days were some of the most insecure of my life.
I realized Jennifer knew my most secret thoughts and fantasies. I
wondered if she still thought of me as a real man. I wanted to hug
her all the time and I even asked her to hold me as we went to
sleep one night.
A few days after the phone call,after we put the kids to bed
Jennifer literally attacked me in our living room. It felt like she
devoured me. She was aggressive and demanding as we made love.
Actually it did not feel like love making, but it was passionate.
During the act she was driving me for more. She was pulling me into
new positions and new angles while urging me on to satisfy her.
After a while I was exhausted but the memory of her taunting
whispers from a few nights before kept my passion fueled. When we
were done, I asked her what had gotten into her. She gave me a very
coy reply, which I knew meant it was none of my business. As I
drifted of to sleep I worried that it was not me that had aroused
her but the memory of Rob. However I was comforted by the fact that
I could satisfy her, no matter what turned her on in the first
place. I slept soundly that night.
After that night we seemed to return to our normal selves and I was
happy. I realized that though things had changed we still loved
each other. In fact, now we even had a very exciting sex life to go
with our deep friendship and love.
Around the same time, I started to experience some problems with my
work. I managed a team of employees and we had a group project that
required everyone to put in extra hours and effort. We had a
deadline which put everyone in my office on edge. I normally try to
be a very supportive boss and not put a lot of pressure on my
people, but this project was different, I had to take the lead and
I could not stand for anyone wasting time. Several times I was
forced to take a hard line with my team in order to get their best
efforts. This put a great deal of stress on me and I know I took
some of it home with me at night.
One evening after a really tough day, Jennifer told me she was
planning on having her hair cut short. I put up a bit of an
argument because I loved the way she looked with her shoulder
length hair. After a little back and forth, Jennifer walked over to
where I was sitting and glared at me. She told me her mind was made
up. Then she gave me the same raised eyebrows that she gave to me
the night she slid into the booth with Rob. I immediately realized
that she would do as she pleased and that I had no say. Strangely
enough, as she walked away I breathed a sigh of relief. It was
great to have her showing so much confidence. Her attitude stirred
feelings of arousal.
When I arrived home the next night I was shocked. I thought she
would just have a little cut, but she looked like a different
person. Her hair was really short and it conformed to the shape of
her head. I guess I was so accustomed to the old style that this
style looked very severe to me. I avoided the question when she
asked me how I liked it and sat down in a chair. She strode over to
me in her now familiar swagger. I could tell she wanted to make a
point.
"You look like you intend to be in charge," I said, feeling
defensive.
She reached down and lifted my chin as she planted a very
aggressive kiss on my mouth. "You will soon get used to it," she
said in a very firm voice.
"I am sure I will, you look great," I said. I think my mouth hung
open as she walked away from me toward our dining room.
The day before my birthday, my team finished its work project. It
had gone well and it was a tremendous relief for all of us to have
finished. In retrospect, I was glad the project had come up. While
it had created a lot of stress for me, it had allowed me to get
past the last few weeks without constantly thinking about my
birthday and about Rob. Thankfully he had not been mentioned in our
house since the night of the phone call. In fact the only mention
of the subject had been when Jennifer had told me we would wait for
the weekend for my present.
Driving home that evening I reflected on the past few weeks. I was
actually surprised that I had been able to keep my mind off of the
upcoming event. I thought back on my history again. I realized it
had always been this way. Don't get me wrong, I had always been
interested in women's clothes, but there were times when I thought
about it all the time, I burned to feel them, but there we other
times when it hardly entered my mind. I was in one of those periods
now, and I questioned whether I should go through with dressing up
at all. Maybe it was something I could control. Rob's words rang in
my mind; "Jennifer does not want to see you dressed as a woman."
For the next day I wrestled with the thought of calling off my big
night. I thought if I told Jennifer I had changed my mind about it,
we could eventually forget everything that had happened. I even
planned my conversation with her, hopeful that I could find a way
to permanently bring back all of the love and affection that was
once a constant in our lives.
Finally my birthday came. It fell on a Thursday night. That day at
work I continued to turn over the possibilities in my mind. Would
giving up my fantasy bring the old Jennifer back? Did I even want
to go back? I realized that even though she seemed to have me
constantly off balance, I had never been more attracted to her than
I was now. Every time I saw her now I wanted to touch her and hold
her.
I was still waffling as I arrived home the night of my birthday. I
immediately made up my mind when I saw Jennifer. She was wearing a
long black skirt, black stockings, and a matching black turtleneck.
The turtleneck clung to her curves and while it was not revealing,
it certainly showed her assets. She looked incredibly sophisticated
and sexy. She must have spent some time considering her outfit,
because it seemed so perfect. To the kids and our family members it
appeared as if Mommy had dressed up for Daddies birthday. However
from my perspective it was the promise of excitement, the promise
of more to come.
We had a nice party with the kids. My mom stopped by after dinner
to drop off a gift and have some cake with the kids. I noticed she
seemed rather cool toward Jennifer. It struck me as odd because
they had always seemed to get along very well in the past. As well
as a mother in law and a wife can, I guess.
After dinner Jennifer and I sat together for a while. I couldn't
help myself and I asked her what would be happening this weekend.
All she would tell me was that I would be dropping the kids off at
my mothers on Saturday. I was beginning to get nervous about what
might happen. I had no idea how far Jennifer would go with my
present. My nervousness was abated when she allowed me to caress
her body and eventually make love to her.
That Friday at work was a very relaxed day. We had finished our
project and we had the weekend coming on. I allowed my staff to
spend extra time at the water cooler and even allowed several of
them to leave early. I spent most of the day thinking about the
coming weekend. I was nervous and excited at the same time. What
would Jennifer have me wear? Was her outfit the night of my
birthday a preview? As the day wound down I found myself getting
more nervous and my mind more preoccupied with my fantasy. I told
my assistant it was ok if she left an hour early.
She was a fairly attractive young woman about twenty five years
old. Despite her youth she had great work ethic and had been a huge
asset to me from the day I hired her two years before. One of her
best qualities was that she could normally read me like a book. She
could tell when I was angry and trying not to show it. She could
also tell when I was not angry, but was trying to act that way to
make a point. As she was packing up I was walking past her desk.
"So any big plans for the weekend?" she asked.
My mind was turning and I was not ready for the question. "Uh, no,
not at all, why?" I stammered my response.
"Oh, no reason, you just seem to be in a great mood today," she
replied and smiled at me. I relaxed a little.
I paused a moment to watch her to see if she had noticed my
uncomfortable response. She was just smiling the way she always
does. "No, I think I am just relaxed because we finished the
project on time, you guys did great," I made sure I threw in a
compliment.
"Yeah it does feel good to have it done, Ok, see you on Monday,"
she said as she picked up her purse and headed for the exit. I
noticed a small smile as she left.
"Bye," I said. I thought about what she would think if she only
knew my plans for the weekend.
Saturday finally came. I was on edge all morning. My mind was
turning over all the possibilities that Jennifer might have in
store for me. I was also nervous about what her reaction would be
after I was dressed. I feared she might be so disgusted that she
would stop the whole thing. She had already told me that she
thought of me differently since I had confessed my desire to dress.
Would seeing me dressed make it even worse? Thoughts of calling the
night off started to resurface.
That afternoon I dropped off our children at my mothers. She asked
if I wanted to stay for a bit, but I told her I had some errands to
run. The truth was I wanted a little time alone to think before I
went home.
On my way home I stopped at a shopping mall. I wanted to just walk
for a while. As I did, I ran everything through my mind again.
Should I decide not to go through with the dressing? After a while,
I passed an attractive woman about my age. She was dressed very
nicely, not sexy, but smart. She seemed so confident, so self
assured as she noticed me looking at her. She gave me a smile when
she noticed my gaze. She was not self conscious at all. She seemed
to enjoy the unspoken attention I gave her. I looked away after
returning the smile. What was it about her that made her that way?
I knew on a conscious level it wasn't the clothes, but my mind
wanted to feel the way she felt, or at least the way I thought she
felt. I made up my mind at that point that I would have to
experience the feeling of being a woman, even if it was just for a
little while.
As I arrived home I had no idea what Jennifer had in store for me.
I took a deep breath and opened the front door. Jennifer was
waiting for me. She was dressed in her casual around the house
clothes. I felt better when she seemed to be as nervous as I was.
"Are you sure you want to go through with this?" she asked me.
"Yes, I think I have to," I replied as I hugged her. She seemed to
hold the hug a little longer than normal. It was as if she was
hugging me for the last time as I was. I tried to push this thought
out of my head.
"Ok, from now on you must do everything I say," she said.
I nodded my head in agreement. She seemed to smile a little and
relax once she had my consent.
She told me to go shave and I headed for our bathroom. I took my
time and tried to shave as close as possible. When I was finished
she lovingly caressed my face. She told me she still felt some
stubble and told me to shave again. This time I put in a new blade
and shaved even slower. I felt my face and it felt smooth to me.
This time it passed inspection.
Jennifer then told me to go get a shower. She had been quiet so far
and was not giving me any clues as to what was still to come. As I
showered the warm water help relax me as I wondered what outfit she
had picked for me. She was waiting with a towel when I finished.
She had me dry off but did not tell me to get out of the shower.
When I was dry she began spreading a lotion all over my body. I was
looking forward to her touching me, but her motions were not
sensual. She was applying a thick layer over every part of my body
from my neck down. The only area she skipped was very conspicuous.
The lotion was cold going on and after a while I noticed it had a
terrible smell. I was starting to get the idea that it was not a
skin moisturizer as I had originally thought. After what seemed
like fifteen minutes I felt my skin beginning to tingle. I called
out to Jennifer to let her know it was getting uncomfortable. My
fear was confirmed when she called back that it was removing all my
body hair. My nerves came back as I immediately realized I would be
dealing with this for some time to come. I tried to figure out in
my mind how long it would take to grow back. I was glad it was
early fall and cool weather was coming on. It would make long
sleeve shirts less noticeable.
For the next five minutes I tried to relax and accept what was
happening. That all went out the window when Jennifer turned on the
shower. The first blast of cool water shocked me, but not nearly as
much as when I saw all of my hair just rinsing off my body.
Jennifer made a coy comment about no pain no gain when she saw the
scared look on my face. When she was confident all of my body hair
was gone she led me to our bathtub.
She had drawn me a bubble bath and the feminine scent of the water
was a welcome change from the smell of the hair removal lotion. I
was glad to have a few moments to relax as I slid into the warm
water. While in the bath it dawned on me just how different my body
felt without hair. First I ran my hands over my arms and felt the
strange smoothness. Then my hands slowly moved down the rest of my
body until I ran my hands over my now smooth legs. The sensations
relaxed me further. I made up my mind at that point to just try to
relax and enjoy my night for what it was, and worry about the
consequences later. I relaxed in the bath for another ten minutes
or so before Jennifer came in with another towel.
I dried off and she led me to our guest room. She had laid out my
clothes on the bed and placed a chair near our full length mirror
that she had covered with a sheet. I took a quick inventory of the
items on the bed as we entered the room. A white silk blouse, a
black skirt, a black bra and panty set, and a pair of black strappy
sandals were all arranged on the bed. In the center was the gift
box from Rob. The sight of the clothes set my mind racing and my
arousal level increased significantly.
Jennifer noticed my arousal and immediately handed me the panties
to put on. She smiled as she handed them to me and took a quick
glance at my crotch. The panties were silky but seemed to have a
lot of elastic in the material. I experienced yet another new
sensation as I pulled the panties up my hairless legs. The material
seemed to mold itself to me as I pulled them in place and tucked
myself off to the side to make myself more comfortable. I glanced
up quickly at Jenn, her eyes were still lingering on my now
constricted manhood. She quickly looked up and handed me one of her
silk dressing gowns.
I put it on as she led me to the chair. The material felt cool on
my skin. I sat down as she began working on my hair. When she had
finished putting curlers on my head she pulled out a cosmetic bag
and began to work on me. There was very little conversation as
Jennifer proceeded to do my nails and applied make up to my face.
When she glued false nails on my fingers I had to remind my self to
just enjoy the experience and to worry about how to get them off
later. She had selected a soft pink shade of nail polish, and from
what I could tell applied a matching lipstick. I found the makeup
had a faint but pleasant smell and I smiled softly when I pursed my
lips. There was a new silky feeling from the lipstick. Finally
Jennifer stepped back and admired her work. She had even polished
my toenails. A strange feeling swept over me as I felt like I was
being evaluated.
She turned around and pulled something out of a drawer behind me.
She paused for a few moments before coming around the front of me
with two artificial breasts. My eyes widened. I wondered were she
got them. I was shocked she was planning to go this far with my
dressing. I tried to relax as she held them to my chest. She spent
a few minutes trying to make sure they were in the right position,
and then she pressed them onto my chest and held them against me
for what seemed like two minutes or so. When she removed her hands
I immediately felt the weight of them pull against the skin on my
chest. I looked down and then quickly back at Jennifer when I
realized she had glued them in place.
"When will they come off?" I said, I knew my voiced sounded
petrified.
She took a moment to read the tube of glue she had in her hands
before responding, "It says they should hold for about a week." She
had a satisfied smile on her face, the same one she had as she
watched my body hair wash away.
"I can't wear these for a week, everyone will see," I pleaded,
hoping she would tell me there was something that would get them
off quicker.
She just giggled at me. "Well you will have to behave then, or
maybe wear a sports bra to flatten them," she said as she handed be
the black lacy bra.
I lowered my eyes as I put the bra on. My new "breasts" filled the
cups perfectly. As Jennifer adjusted the straps for me, the tugging
I felt on my chest lessened. When it was on, my hands instinctively
cupped my chest. As I felt the bra a feeling washed over me. It was
one of contentment. I knew then I would do whatever else Jennifer
demanded. My worries seemed to fade away.
I proceeded to put on the garter belt, blouse and skirt with the
help of Jennifer. She gave me some instructions and I followed
them. I loved the feel of the skirt, it had a silky lining that
gave me a wonderful sensation as I pulled it up my hairless legs
and it rubbed against the panties I had put on earlier.
Finally Jennifer said "Stand up, hands by your side, and let me
look at you." It seemed like and order to me. I did as I was told
and Jennifer gave me the once over. My eyes were downcast but I
heard another of her satisfied giggles.
"Now for the stockings," she said. I glanced at her and she smiled
and raised her eyebrows at me.
I excitedly reached for the packet and started to open it, but
Jennifer stopped me.
"Careful, don't snag them with your new nails," she said as she
opened them and handed me the first stocking.
I sat down and placed the stocking over my foot. I was conscious of
my nails and was very careful to try to grip the material with the
pads of my fingers instead of the tips as I would have normally
done. I took a long time putting the stockings on, both because I
was careful and because I was really enjoying the feeling of the
flimsy material as it stretched and conformed to my legs. When I
was done Jennifer told me to stand and lift my skirt.
It felt very strange standing there holding up my skirt while she
adjusted the stockings and reattached them the garter belt. Her
hands felt wonderful as she adjusted the fabric and smoothed out
the stockings. Finally she handed me the shoes and I put them on.
There was a small heel which seemed to make standing just slightly
awkward. I noticed that the breasts and the heel of the shoes gave
me an ever so slightly different posture.
At last Jennifer pulled the sheet off of our full length mirror. I
was immediately transfixed by what I saw. While I did not think I
would pass a close inspection, I definitely looked like a
reasonably attractive woman. The clothes gave me a very soft,
feminine appearance. I looked a little flat in the chest from the
front, but when I turned to the side, I could see the outline of my
breasts. I was really pleased that I did not look totally
ridiculous. I even noticed how good my legs looked in the stockings
which were very visible since the skirt only came down a few inches
below the ends of the garter. I stood and admired Jennifer's work
for a few moments and even struck a few poses for myself in the
mirror.
In was jolted back to reality when Jennifer asked, "Do you like?"
"Yes very much," I replied and I moved toward her and kissed her
cheek. "Thank you, Jenn."
"It's ok my girly man," she said. Her tone had softened. She smiled
a soft reluctant smile, which I returned.
"Now go sit on the settee and look at the magazines I've left while
I get ready," she said. I walked out of the room and towards the
living area. I enjoyed the many sensations I felt as I walked. The
skirt swishing around my stocking covered thighs, the new bounce in
my chest, and most of all my legs slightly brushing up against each
other.
As I sat down on the couch my mind began to churn again. It was
incredibly exciting to finally be dressed as a woman, but I could
not shake a feeling that I needed something more. I wondered what
else Jennifer might have in store for me that evening. Would we
simply spend the evening talking or did she have other plans? I am
not sure why but I thought back to the night Rob called, and how
she taunted me for not standing up to him. Would she do more of
that tonight? Worse yet, would she call him to tell him I finally
got my wish and was wearing his present? My rational mind feared
these things but as I imagined them I felt that strange feeling of
serenity creeping over me again. What did I really want from all of
this? I realized I still wasn't sure, but at the same time I knew
whatever did happen, it was up to Jennifer. I made up my mind I
would do whatever she said and hope for the best.
After a while, she entered the lounge carrying some drinks. She was
dressed in a simple black outfit with some high heeled sandals. The
mono colored clothes made her appear taller and more confident. She
looked like she was in charge of the situation as she sat down with
me and we began talking. We talked for awhile about nothing in
particular, but the way she talked to me was odd. She was talking
to me as if I wasn't dressed as I was, just innocent chatting.
Finally we went into the kitchen to have dinner together.
Over dinner she finally brought up my outfit. She questioned me for
some time about how I liked my clothes and how I felt about her
choices for me. I found it difficult to talk about my feelings. I
was still embarrassed about why I would like to be dressed like
this. I tried to avoid most of the questions; I worried if I told
her how great everything felt she would think less of me than she
did already.
When we finished our meal, Jennifer stood and took my hand. As she
lead me away from the table she said, "Let's go for a walk in the
garden."
I froze. Even though it was dark outside it was easy to see into
our garden area from the neighbors houses. I was petrified that
anyone would see me. I made a weak protest.
"Don't be silly, it's dark and I will turn off the outside
lighting," she said and paused for a moment before continuing, "all
anyone will see is two women walking together," she added with a
smile and raised eyebrows.
I was still frozen. I felt like I should stand my ground. That was
before Jennifer's smile turned to a scowl.
"Outside now," she commanded, and smacked me square on the ass. I
was surprised at the force of the blow. I could not remember ever
seeing her hit anything before.
I immediately went through the door, but I cowered just outside the
entrance. Jennifer took my hand when she emerged. The warmth of her
touch made me feel better for a moment but then she pulled me out
into the open. I looked up at the night sky. Unfortunately, it was
a clear early autumn evening. There was a nearly full moon that
gave a pale light to our garden. Jennifer and I walked toward a
group of trees at the far end of our garden. It was only twenty
five yards away but it felt like a mile from the security of the
house. When we reached the trees Jennifer pulled me close and
kissed me. Her lips felt wonderful against mine, and it felt
strange as her hands traveled down to my bottom and pulled me into
her. I really wasn't sure how I was supposed to react.
Jennifer broke the kiss and began to lead me back to the house. I
was happy to be getting out of sight, but about halfway to the
house our neighbors outside lights came on. I immediately tried to
hide behind Jennifer and hurry into the house. Jennifer however,
turned and called a greeting to our neighbor before casually
walking back to the house.
I felt like my heart would explode out of my chest when I finally
reached the safety of out living room. I was short of breath as I
said, "How could you?"
She simply laughed at me. "Its all right, no one would recognize
you anyway," she said.
"Please don't do that to me Jennifer," I pleaded. Even though I was
enjoying my outfit my greatest fear was that everyone would find
out about my present. Rob knew already, that was bad enough. I
wondered if she had shared it with anyone else.
She gave me hug and flippantly said, "Do what?"
I tried to calm down as we moved to our sofa. I did not even have
time to catch my breath before Jennifer moved into me. She placed
her hand on the calf of my leg which was crossed toward her. The
feeling was electric as her hand slowly slid up my stocking until
she reached the hem of my skirt. She then lifted her hand to my
face and turned it so I was looking into her eyes as she moved in
to kiss me.
She had kissed me outside but it was nothing like this. Her mouth
covered mine and her tongue pressed into my mouth. This kiss was
gentle but firm at the same time. Her hand remained on my jaw as if
she was thought I would try to break the kiss. After a short time
her hand left my face and began caressing my body. She slowly began
unbuttoning my blouse. Eventually her hand found its way inside my
bra. She gently squeezed my breast form and although she was not
touching me directly, I felt her movements as the breast form
pulled and tugged at the skin it was adhered to. I was surprised at
how good it felt.
Despite all the good feelings I was experiencing as we made out, I
noticed a strange feeling inside of me. On a conscious level I was
experiencing everything I had fantasized about for years. However
I could not shake the feeling that something was missing. There was
the same nagging feeling I had felt several times since the night
Jennifer had slept with Rob. It was as if her new aggressive
attitude had awakened feelings that had been sleeping deep with in
me. Despite the fact that I was definitely enjoying the feeling of
Jennifer fondling and kissing me, my self doubts were manifesting
themselves below my waist. I noticed that I had not yet achieved an
erection.
After a while Jennifer's hands began to move under my skirt. My
first reaction was to open up to her and allow access but I did not
want her to feel my limp penis which was still trapped in my
panties. My anxiety built as her hands reached the tops of my
stockings. I shifted positions trying to evade her caressing,
probing fingers. Finally despite my struggles her hand cupped my
flaccid manhood. She continued to kiss me for a few more minutes
before breaking the kiss and moving away from me. I could hear the
frustration in her voice.
"It's time we went to bed," she said as she got up and took my
hand.
We walked toward our bedroom. I was hoping a change of venue would
help me relax and enjoy the experience. Unfortunately my penis
still felt as unresponsive as ever.
Halfway down our hall she stopped. We were right in front of our
guest room. She turned to me and gave me a soft kiss on the check.
I looked into her eyes. There was sadness in them.
"Goodnight, girly man," she said to me softly.
"What?" I pleaded, "Aren't we sleeping together?"
"I don't sleep with women, and I only invite men like Rob into my
bedroom," she replied in a manner of fact voice.
I looked down. How could I argue with her? I was standing before
her in a blouse and skirt. I remembered the night I slept in our
guest room while she and Rob slept together in our bed. I felt like
I had given up my masculinity. I had no idea what to say next but
I knew I could not spend the night alone in the guest room.
Instinctively I grabbed her arm.
"Please Jenn sleep with me," I begged. I held on to her arm as if
I were hanging on to our marriage.
"Why," she shot back. "You aren't interested and I am not into
rape," she almost shouted at me. She looked at me with a piercing
stare, "let go of me."
I released her arm. I knew I was in no position to make any demands
of her. After all that had happened, I knew that whatever happened
from here would be up to her. I was in her hands. Our marriage was
in her hands.
"I'm sorry Jennifer, please forgive me," was all I could say. I
knew I was asking for more than forgiveness for grabbing her. I was
asking for everything. I moved forward to embrace her.
She avoided me and pushed me toward our bedroom. "Go in and we will
get you ready for bed," she said.
"Please Jennifer," was all I could manage. I was terrified of what
she thought of me, dressed as a woman, begging to sleep with her.
"Go touch up your lipstick," she told me.
"I don't know how," I asked. I wondered why.
"Just do what you have seen me do many times," she said. Her voice
had changed back to a soft encouraging tone.
I went to her vanity and picked up the lipstick I found there. It
took me a minute, but I tried to put it on as evenly as possible.
I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I still looked like a
woman, but I was not sure what I felt like at that moment. Suddenly
my thoughts were shattered as I saw the flash of our camera. I
immediately spun around to face her.
"What are you doing?" I screamed, even though I knew. I had dreaded
that she might do this. She was taking my picture for Rob. The
image of his condescending smile flashed through my mind.
"I thought we should have a picture of girly," she said with an
innocent smile. "Stand up and let me see you properly,"
"No," I begged her to stop.
She simply smiled at me. Her demeanor had changed. The uncertainty
has left her. I could tell she knew exactly what she wanted. "Yes
Steve, I want us both to remember this," she said coolly. Her tone
sent a shiver through me.
I rose slowly. For what ever reason I knew I had to. My eyes were
downcast as she again spoke to me. "Now tidy yourself up," she
commanded. I just stood there not knowing how.
She moved toward me and rubbed a tissue over my face. She stood
back and admired her work when she was finished. "Now button up
your blouse and look presentable," she said.
I slowly turned and looked at myself in the mirror as I buttoned my
blouse. It was strange trying to adjust myself in the mirror. I
actually wanted to look nice for my picture. It was the moment I
dreaded most but for some reason I was taking a small amount of
pride in my feminine appearance. I wanted the picture to at least
be respectable. I turned back to Jennifer and asked if I looked ok,
my eyes were still glued to the floor at her feet.
"Better," she said. "Now look at the camera."
I slowly looked up. I thought she would give me a chance to smile
or do something, but she snapped the shot just as I looked at the
lens.
"Good," she said. "Now shall we have one showing off your figure?"
Her tone was lighthearted but slightly mocking.
"Take your blouse off," she commanded.
"Oh no," I stammered. I started to unbutton the blouse and remove
it. She took the next picture as it fell from my body. I realized
my new breasts would be clearly visible in the shot.
When it fell away Jennifer told me to take off my skirt. I begged
her not to take any more pictures.
"I need one for Rob showing his present," she told me.
I am not sure how to describe my feelings at that moment, but I
will try. I knew that Rob had slept with my wife. I knew Rob had
already been told of my desire to wear women's clothes and I knew
that he probably knew what was happening to me that night, but at
the same time I could not bring myself to pose for a picture for
him. It was as if Jennifer was stripping away my last shred of
dignity. My eyes began to fill with tears. I felt like I had given
up everything, just for the feel of women's clothes. My voice came
out in a raspy whisper.
"Oh no, you can't do that," I said feebly.
She repeated herself, "Steve, take off your skirt."
I just stood there frozen.
She quickly moved toward me and in one motion, unzipped my skirt.
As it fell, I grabbed for it, it felt like my last chance. Then I
felt the slap of Jennifer's hand on my upper thighs. She smacked me
hard twice. I let the skirt drop. I felt the cold fabric pool
around my feet. My hands moved to cover the exposed are