Joke-Untitled free porn video

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A man breaks into a house to look for money and guns.
Inside, he finds couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of the bed and ties him to a chair.
While tying the home owner's wife to the bed
The convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck,
Then gets up & goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband whispers over to his wife:
'Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes!
He's probably spent a lot of time in jail
And hasn't seen a woman in years.
I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex,
Don't resist, don't complain...do what ever he tells you.
Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you.
This guy is obviously very dangerous.
If he gets angry, he'll kill us both.
Be strong, honey. I love you!'

His wife responds: 'He wasn't kissing my neck.
He was whispering in my ear.
He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute,
And asked if we had any Vaseline.
I told him it was in the bathroom.
Be strong honey. I love you too.'

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I remember the day I first saw her. I remember that day well. The heat from the sun, the mixed aromas of coffee and car exhausts as we sat in an outdoor cafe. I was alone, of course, but she wasn’t. A punk ass was with her. Some chatty hollywood wannabe wearing a fifty dollar tee shirt and fancy sneakers. I had no interest in him. Weaklings neither excite or challenge my… darker sensibilities. My intuition told me that she secretly held the same disdain for him. Maybe it was the way she blew...

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The leather was soft as it scraped against Elle's skin. Alex tightened the strap, fastening the buckle. He stood over her, his amber eyes alit with a translucent glow. A slight smile grazed his lips as she reached out her unbound hand towards him. He shook his head, encircling her slim wrist with his larger hand. Pinning her arm against the satin cloaked bed, he began to wrap the second leather strap around her wrist. Pale skin contrasting against the dark leather. Closing her eyes, she...

Quickie Sex

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I remember the day I first saw her. I remember that day well. The heat from the sun, the mixed aromas of coffee and car exhausts as we sat in an outdoor cafe. I was alone, of course, but she wasn't. A punk ass was with her. Some chatty hollywood wannabe wearing a fifty dollar tee shirt and fancy sneakers. I had no interest in him. Weaklings neither excite or challenge my... darker sensibilities. My intuition told me that she secretly held the same disdain for him. Maybe it was the...

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joke of the day

So this guy goes up to a girl and tries to charm her by saying "hey i was gonna tell you a joke about my dick but it's too long".The girl replies,"thats funny".I was gonna tell you a joke about my pussy...but you'll never get it".

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