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I normally write for Literotica, but since this story's TG, there's no harm in crossposting it. Overall, I'd recommend the Literotica version more (it's very heavy on italics, which I apparently can't use on FictionMania), but the story should be similar on both sites. As an advance warning, every character has a different approach to gender pronouns, some of them far less enlightened than others. I apologize for any offense or confusion. Prologue (May 5 and August 7, a century apart) As I write these words, I am no longer Grand Priest of the Church of the True Divine. There's nothing left for me to be Grand Priest of. I must write for both the present and the future. In the present, priests across the no-longer-Blessed land must already be scared and confused, wondering why the Divine no longer answers their prayers. In the future, generations that grew up never knowing the Divine will need to understand why it was so beautiful, and so corruptive. I will not here explain the nature of my deed. Suffice it to say that, in committing it as Grand Priest, I have placed a seal on the Divine that will never be broken. What I will explain is why I did it... --The Apology of Jovan the Blasphemer "I'll let you sum up the rest," the instructor told them. "How did the Blasphemy come about?" For a moment, Astra wondered whether she was back in primary school. Every Blessed over the age of six knew this story, and most could probably recite the first two lines from memory. Then she noticed that the instructor was looking at the seat behind her. "Hashan, you get to answer this one," he continued, and Astra realized how much the next quarter of Basic Theoretical Crystalology was going to suck for the one student in the class who wasn't Blessed. She had to admit that he cut a nice figure as he stood up from his desk, dressed in a poncho and pants rather than Blessed robes, his exotic black hair hanging behind him in a ponytail. She might even have called the soft curves of his face cute, different as they were from the points and angles of the Blessed. "We call them Scorned," he recited confidently, "because the Divine has not gifted them with magic. But I have studied their 'crystalology', and while it is a weaker power than our own, it has an important trait that ours lacks--" "You've memorized it," the instructor interrupted. "It's interesting," the Scorned replied. "He thought in strange ways." "I didn't ask you to memorize it," the instructor told him. I didn't ask you to come in here with that stupid Scorned hair, and that stupid Scorned clothing, and flaunt that your people have studied this for centuries longer than mine have, he said in all but words. "I asked you to answer the question. Can you answer in his place, Mercy?" The sound of her surname caught Astra off guard, and she stood and answered before she'd really thought it through. "Well, I'm of the opinion that he fried his own brain trying to mix crystalology with Energy magic--" "WHAT?" the instructor bellowed. She knew she was digging herself deeper, but she couldn't seem to stop. "They studied him--I mean, when he died--there were marks on his brain--" "Broadaxe, your turn. Jovan wanted us to use crystals instead of magic. Why did he want that?" Broadaxe Perrin turned out to be a short, soft-voiced boy she'd never met before, who looked surprisingly calm in the face of the teacher's rage. "Crystals are egalitarian. Magic required a very strong will--no woman or Scorned could ever become a priest--but anyone can use any kind of crystal." "Exactly right. So why are you here?" The boy seemed out of his depth. "Uh, because I want to be a healer..." "Let me rephrase that question. If I handed you a crystal right now, you could call power forth from it. But in Scorned lands, most of the people in this class wouldn't be allowed to so much as hold one. And let me take the opportunity to remind you all--" Here he looked at the Scorned just a little longer than necessary-- "That even here, it is a crime to use one with neither a license nor proper supervision from an instructor like myself. Why is that, Broadaxe?" "Crystals do weird things sometimes. We need to know how to keep them under control." "Precisely! I may seem harsh sometimes, but I've worked with crystals for decades. I've seen life crystals rip people apart from the inside, cold crystals freeze people's fingers off... It's my job to ram the theory into your heads, not so nothing ever goes wrong, but so you can fix things when they do go wrong, hopefully before someone gets killed." Perrin nodded enthusiastically, until the teacher told all three of them to sit down. "Now, let's see who bothered to do the reading. Fisher, can you tell me the first principle of crystalology?" Astra took it back--this next quarter would suck for everyone. -- -- -- -- She met the Scorned again the next day, at the absolute last place she'd expected--the outdoor physical training grounds, where he was working through a warm-up routine with a wooden rod. She stood a safe distance in front of him and went through her own routine, not meeting his eye until she was done. "I didn't know Scorned trained with staves. How good are you?" "Not very good," he replied. "I'm getting better, though." He examined both her and her staff, and she couldn't resist a smile as his eyes widened. "That is a very good staff. Are you good?" "My great-great-great-grandfather was Mercy Orsin," she told him. When it was clear he had no idea what that meant, she added, "Of the Order of Orsin?" When he didn't respond to THAT, "Orsin commanded that we heal the sick, never kill, and never use edged weapons. I've been learning the staff since I was five years old." "My father's father's father's... however many, all of them were merchants. I've learned to buy and sell since before I was five. I cannot buy and sell like they can." His smile was gentle, but his question was serious. "Are you good?" She twirled her staff overhead for a few seconds, then swung it downwards. It made a satisfying THUNK against the packed dirt. "I'm the best my age in the order, though Piety Alban would argue the point." "The best at one of Orsin's three commands. You study life crystals to fulfill another. Am I correct?" "I was wondering if you remembered me from class." He was clearly smarter than she'd expected. "I found your why. Can you find mine?" "Uh, you like the climate? You think bread tastes better than rice? You have a thing for yellow-haired Blessed girls?" For some reason, that last one amused him. "You are funny, miss... Mercy, it was? I will give you my why as a gift. I am merchant caste. Few merchants rise to warrior caste, and fewer warriors rise to crystal- worker caste. I want to see if it is true that Blessed have no castes." He hoisted his staff above his head, then slowly lowered it. "I would challenge you now, but you said you are good. I must first challenge another who is not good. I will challenge you when I beat him." "Hold that thought." Out of the corner of her eye, she'd noticed Alban together with Merritt, both in padded armor. "Come over this way. This should be fun to watch." Alban had already donned his helmet, and was giving Merritt his usual warning. "I hope you're better prepared for this than last time." Merritt was giving his usual reply. "Best of three, loser pays for lunch at The Boar's Head... Hey, we've got an audience! I'll try to fight extra hard!" He did. He truly did. For the first time in six matches, he actually scored a hit. But as always, the first thing out of his mouth when his ass hit the dirt for the final time was "I'll get you next time." Astra took over the introductions once he'd stood again. "These fine folks over here are Piety Alban and Charity Merritt. If the names didn't tip you off, they're fellow members of my order. And this strapping fellow is... er... Hasan, was it?" The Scorned made a sound that reminded her of a sneeze. "But you Blessed say the given name last, so..." He repeated the sneeze with some of the syllables switched around. "Blessed never pronounce it right, though. Call me Hashan Sahe." In retrospect, she thought it significant that he thought backwards from how she did. At the time, however, she simply smiled. "If you'd like to have lunch with us, Hashan Sahe, I'm sure Merritt's finances can accommodate one more person." Merritt started to protest, of course, but they all ignored his whining as they made their way off the field. Horace (September 14, late afternoon) It is not a simple task for a priest to master his powers, for he must keep his powers from mastering him. In the Divine, we find all--all good, and all evil--and only through the strength of our wills can we withstand what it shows us. The first step on this road is self-understanding. If yours is the magic of Matter, the simple things in life make you happy and cheerful. At times--but only at times--you think wistfully of extravagance. Find friends and lovers with the power of Shadow, and the time you spend with them will make you more generous. Cessation, however, will give you tools you can't be trusted with. --The Primer of Talents At the moment, the only thing that would have made Bravery Horace particularly happy and cheerful would have been a plateful of roast chicken at The Boar's Head. Astra had promised to pay if he'd take part in the ritual, and he was eager to get it over with. He didn't want to spend any more time out in the middle of the woods as it got closer and closer to sundown. But no, the Scorned kept asking questions! "You haven't told me much, Astra. What is this ritual?" "It's something the order does to remember the Divine. We try to set things up so at least one is performed every month of the year--that way, the Divine won't feel like it's only remembered some of the time. Any six people can perform it, so long as they hold a love for the Divine in their hearts..." Merritt didn't seem to be holding any more love for the Divine at the moment than Horace, stamping his feet to keep warm in the chill air. Alban was engrossed in his work, using a stick to draw a circle of runes around the edges of the clearing (or rather, the bare patch of dirt Astra had dignified with the term "clearing.") Sahe seemed mildly curious, but not exactly invested, and the friend he'd brought along was completely unreadable, standing in place and silently watching. "Why me?" the Scorned asked. "I can't know the Divine. And Perrin... is Perrin," he finished, as if that was reason enough. "As a woman, I can't know it either. But that doesn't mean we can't love and honor it. Besides, you'll just be watching if Lucius and Curtis finally show up. Which they should any second now..." The two spectacularly failed to appear. "Figures. Sahe, you can stand in for Lucius as High Priest of Shadow. Perrin, you'll be Cessation. All you'll need to do is repeat part of a rhyme in the old tongue." "Can I be Shadow this time?" Merritt asked. "I like the way the words sound. 'Rossiu rassio! Rossiu rassio!'" As if on cue, he shivered. "Also, can we finish this quickly? I'm sure the Divine wouldn't want us to be out in the cold like this." "Okay, then, you can be Shadow. Sahe, you're Energy, and every time I say 'tawu sangio', you say 'crevu menio.' Got it? 'Crevu menio.' And Perrin, when he says that, you'll say 'Silu henio.' I'll be Grand Priest as well as Void, so I'll say other things at the start, too. Now, Sahe stands on this rune; Perrin stands on that one. Merritt will know when it's time to stop." This is so boring, Horace thought as Astra began the litany. Does she really think the Divine will listen to all this? Then, as the chant passed from person to person, Kind of a waste, such a nice body given to such a fanatic. If there's anything left in the world that's truly Divine, it's between the legs of women-- Horace would later realize that his careless thought had done several things, and only the most minor was that it had given some insight into what the Blasphemy must have been. They'd known that Jovan had done something on the most sacred altar of the church, and they'd suspected that he hadn't acted alone. Only one act, treated as unholy, could have forced the Divine to leave--until the same act, restructured in holy terms, allowed it to come back. At the time, all Horace knew was that he suddenly couldn't see. Things hadn't gone black, nor had they gone white. Horace was beyond colors at the moment. He was naked, his back against the dirt, his front against someone else's skin. They were warm together in the cold air, and there was something around them that he couldn't identify--something powerful, something... magical. Almost abstractly, he wondered whether to be afraid. Then the other body moved, and he felt something inside him in a place he didn't recognize. He shifted against it, slowly at first, testing the way it felt. Then, before he'd realized what he was doing, he found himself kissing this magical body's lips. It was startled at first, but then it pressed against him, comfortingly firm as it knew just what he wanted. They joined in two places, his tongue in the other's mouth and the other's... something in him. They rocked and bucked, faster and faster, until he had to stop moving, had to break from the kiss, had to cry out in a high voice that was not his... The world returned, and Horace found himself on his back, his legs spread wide. The body atop his was frail and light, but it was also quite clearly male. To his left, he turned his head to see a Scorned woman (whom he was fairly certain had recently been a Scorned man) sucking at a smaller woman's breast, only to stop, suddenly aware and ashamed. To his right, two more women were lost in their own world, one moaning with her eyes closed as the other's head bobbed between her legs. He would have looked up at the sky, but a face he couldn't stand to stare at blocked his view. He closed his eyes, and directly into that face, he shouted the three most appropriate words ever said. "What the FUCK?" Kyrie (September 14, evening) "I am not eternal," the Divine told them, "and in two ways may I leave you. Reject me, with the full force of hate, and I will go away until I am wanted again. But neglect me, and I will never return to you. There must always be a priest for all of my aspects, and should even one be missing from your Church, my power will vanish from this world." --The Parable of the First Church "Our cause is just." The speaker's voice was loud and clear in the crisp evening air, and Kyrie would have rolled his eyes had he not been so caught up in the rhythm. "Our hands are empty, but our hearts are steady, and our time is now! Are you ready to stand against hatred and oppression?" "YES!" Kyrie shouted, and many voices shouted with him. "Are you ready to fight for your brothers and sisters?" "YES!" "We march!" the speaker finished. Kyrie was on the edge of the crowd--which, not coincidentally, meant he was at the front of the march. He led the way down gaslit streets, past what seemed an endless line of befuddled bystanders at their front windows, repeating the chant of "Equal rights!" to pierce their literal and metaphorical slumber. It warmed his heart to hear the words in so many different tones, and for a while, he hoped that things would go smoothly. Predictably, they only marched four blocks before the city watch blocked their way. Never mind that Kyrie had checked and triple-checked the regulations--it was late enough, and they were loud enough, that technical obedience to disturbance-of-the-peace laws meant diddly squat. "Go home!" one of the watchmen shouted, barely loud enough to be heard clearly over the crowd. Kyrie responded with an obscene gesture, and beside him, a Scorned woman mimicked it. It slowly spread throughout the crowd. Technically, the protesters attacked first, with an unidentifiable thrown piece of garbage that hit a watchman square in the chest. This was the only provocation the watchmen needed to close ranks. There was no room to dodge in such a tightly packed space, and Kyrie regretted his front-row position as a truncheon descended toward his head. He didn't close his eyes, so he caught a glimpse of the flash of light that froze his attacker in his tracks. The Scorned woman beside him rushed forward, slamming the watchman aside and breaking the tightly packed ranks. Just past the blockade was a narrow alleyway, and he followed her into it as the crowd descended into chaos. They didn't stop to catch their breath until they'd reached a parallel street. "Thanks," he told her once he'd finished gasping. "For what?" she replied. Her voice surprised him--its depth seemed to belong in a much bigger body--but her tone was obvious. She was nervous. "That was a time crystal back there, wasn't it?" he asked. "Don't worry, I won't rat you out if you don't have a license. I'm just happy my head's in one piece. By the way, my name's Kyrie. What's yours?" Her answer was surprisingly straightforward. "My name's Sahe, and you don't have to thank me. My day has been very confusing. Your protest helped clear my head." Another pause. "Do you do these things often?" He took a moment to look her over, and he decided that he liked what he saw. He didn't normally go for Scorned chicks, but there was a confidence in her stance that he found intriguing--and besides, he would never miss a chance for a date with a girl with such huge knockers. "I ought to go back to the protest--there are some people I need to check on--but if you want to talk some more about our cause, I'll be at The Boar's Head at noon tomorrow. Since you saved me, I'll pay for the meal." Perrin and Merrit (September 14, late afternoon and evening) If you are of Cessation, you're always thinking and questioning, but not often feeling. Light will help you understand your emotions, but Matter will influence you towards selfishness. Priests of Shadow desire unity and avoid conflict, but beyond that, they often find themselves aimless. Matter will help motivate you, but Void will only make you more lost. --The Primer of Talents "I don't get it," Horace kept repeating. At least, Perrin thought it was Horace--the brown-haired, charmingly plump girl before him bore little resemblance to any Horace he'd known. "I just don't get it." Perrin would have wondered if she'd cracked, but he wasn't entirely sure he hadn't cracked either. It was easy to think of Astra as "he," and not too hard to call each of the others "she." Yet every time he almost deemed himself "herself," he felt like he was standing with his feet on either side of a splitting faultline. "We have to think rationally about this," Astra insisted. "What just happened must have been the work of the Divine." Astra and Sahe had been the first to dress themselves, their clothes neatly piled at the edge of the rune pattern. Sahe had checked an inner pocket of her poncho when she'd thought no one was looking, and she'd breathed a sigh of relief to find something inside it that looked suspiciously like a crystal. At any other time, Perrin would have analyzed this new data for any possible significance, but at the moment, he found himself singularly preoccupied. "Why would the Divine have done this?" Horace demanded. "Your hair," another voice interrupted, higher and more feminine than all the others. It took Perrin a moment to realize that it was his own, and he cursed the sound of it even before he cursed his sudden loss of self- control. Merritt, of all people, was the one to figure out what he meant. "Astra, your hair's all white! And Horace, yours went brown!... No one else's is any different, right?" From the looks of it, Astra was putting two and two together, followed by putting four with six and ten with the square root of negative one. "I think the Divine just changed its paradigm." "In simple words?" Sahe asked. "You've seen the old drawings, haven't you?" Astra replied. "Energy priests with phoenix feathers in their hair, Cessation priests with thick white beards like yetis... Before the Blasphemy, magic was a part of nature, and it bound priests to nature. Maybe that wasn't the only way it could have worked. Maybe all it needed to do was change priests' bodies, and it just found a different way to change them." He swallowed. "I think we're the new High Priests. I just performed a blessing ritual on Horace. Once I bless the rest of us, we'll be able to use magic, and we'll be able to bless others with it, too--" Sahe interrupted with a profane exclamation that only Perrin recognized. You're too late, my friend, Perrin thought. Horace already did. "Please, calm down," Astra told her. "I don't think this ritual would have worked if you didn't love the Divine as much as I do--" "I'll be back here tomorrow morning. If I'm not back to normal by then, we'll talk again." As she vanished amongst the trees, another figure followed her, and Perrin realized too late whom he'd neglected to pay attention to. "Alban, where are you going?" Merritt asked. "Get back here!" Failing to receive a response, she addressed her next sentence to no one in particular. "He'll be fine, right? Should I go after him?" "Talk fast," Perrin told Astra, "before you lose anyone else." He looked him over. "Have you noticed that you're shivering? Get dressed, and we'll discuss this at The Boar's Head." -- -- -- -- For better or for worse, no one paid any attention to them. Bleached white hair was far from the strangest thing to be found among the patrons of The Boar's Head--if anything, they were at most risk of being noticed for Horace's ill-fitting robes. A small corner table was fortunately unoccupied, and the four determined that their pooled funds were enough to cover everyone's meal. After about half a plate of roast chicken, Merritt felt ready to talk again. "Doesn't this feel right to anyone else?" she asked. Perrin made a show of checking for eavesdroppers. "What in the world do you mean?" "Horace, I found those books you hide under your bed, the ones with the drawings of girls having sex with each other. Now that you look like a girl, you can get girls like that to go to bed with you." Horace stayed silent, though his face reddened. "And Astra, you like to say 'It's not a woman's place to take power.' Now you can boss guys around without it being sinful!" Before he could interject, "Perrin, I'm sure there's something you get from this, too." "What do you get from it?" Perrin asked, his tone a little too eager. Clearly, he was getting back to his normal self. "I don't know. It just feels... You know when you wake up some days and you feel like you just don't fit in your own body? I feel like the opposite of that now. Like I'm starting to really understand how bad I was at being a guy." "Show of hands," Horace asked. "Who else saw this coming?" Astra and Perrin both stared at him, clearly not catching his meaning. Hung for a sheep, hung for a goat, she thought. "I'm not a guy who likes guys. I like guys--" One guy, she thought, as a picture of Alban flashed through her head-- "But I'm not a guy who likes guys." A very long pause followed. "Why don't we make this a double date?" Astra was the first to choke something out. "What in the world..." "Sure, it's not serious--none of us are in love with each other--but it'll help us understand how we feel. Horace, you were chanting Matter in the ritual, right? They say Matter goes with Shadow, and you're enough of a guy for me to give you one date, even if you look like a girl now. I'll even be a girl for you. Astra, you can work it out with Perrin which of you is the girl." "And what will we do on this... date?" Horace pronounced the word like it was the name of an exotic poison. "We're already having a nice romantic dinner, even if it is a little greasy," Merritt explained "When we leave, we can go for a walk under the stars--maybe share a kiss or two--and by the end of the night, we'll know whether we really want to bless each other. If it doesn't feel right, we'll forget all about it, and we'll try to figure out how to get back to normal." "I'm for it," Perrin said, to Merritt's surprise. "I feel very strange right now, and I'd like to figure out if it's the good kind of strange or the bad kind." "I'll do it too," Astra added. "I guess I've got nothing to lose," Horace said. "All right!" Merritt told them. "Let's begin the date!" She adopted the most seductive voice she could manage. "Horace, you're uh, looking quite handsome today..." -- -- -- -- "You know, I'm genuinely curious whether I can do this," Perrin said. "It's strange," Astra replied, "but I think it's what the Divine wants. " Astra had led them back to the clearing where they'd performed the ritual. They all knew they couldn't spend the night in the school dorms. What they hadn't discussed, but were all thinking of, was what they'd spend the night doing. "I don't really care one way or the other about the Divine," Perrin told him. "I'm just thinking about me. I never thought about... you know... before. Not even with a girl. It just wasn't something that occurred to me. Now I'm trying not to talk about whether I'm about to do it with a guy, and..." Out with it. They'd seen him naked in the literal sense; why not the metaphorical? "I think part of me actually wants it. In the ritual, I felt something new to me, and I'd like to feel it again." "Perrin..." Astra began, then trailed off, at a loss for words. Perrin turned his gaze. "Merritt, I'd like to ask you to go first, and let me watch. I think it'll help me understand." Merritt was already removing her robes, no longer bothered by the cold. "Hey, Horace, you know the picture on page twelve of Corrupted Crystal? Let's do that with Astra in place of the hermaphrodite. I'll be the girl in the middle." Apparently, the picture in Corrupted Crystal involved a girl sucking cock while having her cunt licked. Much more apparently, the exact position was only possible in fiction. Whatever Perrin was looking for, he couldn't find it in this swirl of tongues and other parts, nor in the struggling mass of arms and legs the three collapsed into as they lost their balance. No, he found it in Merritt's laugh as she emerged from the heap. "Okay, maybe page twelve was a bit much," she said. "How about sixteen?" In retrospect, Perrin couldn't have found a better group of people to have his first orgy with. Astra looked appropriately beatific as he lay on his back with his robe hitched up, unashamed to do anything for the Divine. Horace was embarrassed at first to sit on Astra's face and let herself be licked, but no doubt she was rationalizing it as some manner of girl-on-girl. Merritt simply smiled as she took Astra's cock in hand, and it was because of her smile that Perrin moved closer when she gestured to him with her free hand. "Sixteen is when the maid joins in on the fun," she told him. "She kneels at the hermaphrodite's side, and he squeezes her breast." Perrin said nothing as he knelt and lifted Astra's hand, placing it against the front of his robe. For tonight, at least, there were worse things he could be than a she. At least she wasn't the one who had to bear Horace's weight on her head! The time passed quickly in touching and licking, marked only by the rhythm of heartbeats and the sound of Horace's moans. One moment, Merritt's tongue was playing with the tip of Astra's cock; the next, she was drenched in a glowing white liquid that could have been anything but semen. Perrin watched as it soaked into her, blackening hair and reshaping bone. When it was done, she could have passed for Sahe's more beautiful cousin. Perrin found herself laughing, and Merritt joined in. "He cums magic!" Perrin said. "He actually cums magic! Can you cast any spells now?" Merritt stared intently at a low-hanging tree branch. "I guess not," she eventually said. Perrin turned her attention lower. "Horace, you can get off of Astra now." "Never again!" Astra told them, once his mouth was no longer obstructed. "I was afraid I might suffocate!" His tone was utterly serious, and Perrin couldn't help laughing again. "Uh, I don't mean that I'm not ready to go again," Astra continued. "A Grand Priest never runs out of energy when blessing disciples." This was when Perrin finally began to undress herself. "Go on, stick it in," she said. "I think I've found what I'm looking for." "I knew you'd come around. The Divine wouldn't have chosen us if any of us weren't meant to be priests." "I don't care about this priest thing. I just want to see the look on your face when we do it!" In response to his expression of utter incomprehension, she continued, "I'm not as cold as people think I am. I guess sex doesn't make me happy the same way it makes you happy, but if it makes you happy, it makes me happy to see you happy, you know?" In lieu of untangling that statement, Astra made a downwards gesture. Perrin lay back, on top of her robes, spreading her legs in an invitation to enter. In the brief time before their shared joy overwhelmed her, she wondered if she should remind the others about Sahe and Alban. Nah, probably not, she thought. They should both be fine. Sahe and Alban (September 15) You who follow Energy have a constant drive to improve yourselves and eliminate your weaknesses, but you are at risk of developing contempt for those less determined than you. Void will make your resolve even stronger, but Light will feed your feelings of superiority. All who are of Light understand their own wants and needs very well. That's why you have such trouble compromising with other people. Cessation's understanding of the outside world mixes well with your understanding of your inner world, but avoid Energy, lest it provide false justification for your inflexibility. --The Primer of Talents Not long after sunrise, two figures met at the edge of the woods. "I hope you had a better night than I did," Alban said. Sahe considered that. "I saved a boy at a protest. I think he wants to date me. He's handsome, for a... Blessed, so I guess my night was good." (He'd stopped himself in time before he would have used the slur "piss- hair." That would have been bad, no matter how Blessed yellow hair looked to his people.) Alban seemed to have been caught off-guard. "You're into boys now?" "Always have been--and girls, too. Scorned have two rules. Don't do it with kids, and don't do it with animals. We have many rules about marriage, but that's just for raising kids..." Sahe swore in his native tongue. "Just realized something. Two things may be true. Maybe I can't have kids like this. Maybe I can. Not sure which is worse." "Children are the least of my worries at the moment," Alban told him. "Listen, let's take a moment to talk, before we go speak to the others." "I can hear you, you know!" someone called from amongst the trees-- Merritt, most likely. "I'm supposed to check and see if you're coming. I can go away if you really want me to." "No need," Alban said. "It wasn't really important." Is Alban in love with someone? Sahe wondered. It was certainly a possibility--she might be wondering whether a sudden shift in sexes would change her feelings. The question, of course, was who she might be in love with... -- -- -- -- The second thing Alban noticed when he walked into the clearing was that there was a Scorned already present. The third was that there was also a girl with blue hair, shorter and slighter than the bulky Horace and even the ethereal Astra. Apparently, Merritt and Perrin had changed quite a bit in becoming High Priests. He noticed Astra first, of course. He'd always noticed Astra first. "I'm sorry I ran off last night," he heard himself saying. "I was confused. Actually, I'm still confused. Can anyone tell me what's going on?" "We've been arguing about that ourselves," Astra said. "I think we've found the source of the problem, at least. We need to rephrase our initial question." "Our initial question..." Sahe repeated. "You mean 'Why did this happen?'" "Correct, Sahe! I brought up the converse--why did this not happen before? We've done this ritual several times, with Lucius and Curtis instead of you and Perrin. Merritt, can you repeat what you said?" "Can you imagine Lucius with breasts?" "It sounds a bit flippant at first, but I don't think Lucius would have accepted this. Horace very nearly didn't--" Sahe advanced a step closer. "Did I accept this?" he asked. "You're worried that Jovan was right, aren't you?" Astra said. "I think that's the other half of the equation. Most other groups that perform the ritual don't have any women or Scorned. The Divine wanted to make certain that this time around, not only Blessed men would become priests--" A step closer. "Then who won't be priests?" Astra seemed confused. "The unwise, I assume. The weak-willed. Those who don't deserve the power." A step closer, and he was almost in her face. "As determined by whom?" "Well, the Divine will have final say--" "I have listened for a month to your preaching about worth. You amused me. I thought you harmless. That was a mistake--" "Shut up!" Alban screamed. Sahe turned to face him, his smile thin. "Your people have a saying. The truth hurts. My people served yours for centuries. I will not let the Divine be free again--" "Shut the fuck up! How dare you talk to her that way!" Just a few minutes ago, he'd been talking like Alban's friend, and now... "Her," Sahe repeated, as if savoring the word. "It makes sense now." "What are you--" This time, it was Merritt who shouted. "Stop it! All of you, stop it!" Sahe addressed himself to Astra, slightly louder than was necessary. "I assume we will all skip school today. Tomorrow, during prayer, I will go to my room and get my staff. I expect you to get yours as well. I will meet you in this clearing." Alban yelled after him as he walked away. "Apologize to Astra, you bastard! I refuse to let you say this rubbish!" He looked back just long enough for a few words. "I'm sorry for this. You're faithful, but I don't think you're like Astra. Some day, you'll see through her." "Don't bother being mad at her," Perrin said once he was gone. "Sometimes she just latches onto things. I guess she's latched onto the idea that Astra's a jackass, and it'll be tricky to get her off it." Alban turned back to Astra. "From the looks of it, only him and me aren't priests yet. I'd like to talk to you alone. If you're up for a meal at The Boar's Head--" Astra laughed. "I'm sorry," she said, "but I was there just last night." At his expression, "But if you want to talk, we can go for a walk. The rest of you can, er, get fitted for some new robes or something. Just be sure to be back here in the evening--we need to talk about Sahe." -- -- -- -- Sahe and Kyrie found each other just outside The Boar's Head. "I hope you haven't waited long," Sahe said. "A while, but not too long," Kyrie replied. "I've never dated before," Sahe admitted. "I don't know all the rules." "Love follows no rules, my dear," Kyrie said in an alarmingly smooth tone. Then, in his normal voice, "By the Divine, I almost gagged when I said that." As they waited to order, the first topic of conversation was Kyrie's work. "So, what was that protest about, anyways? I heard something about 'equal rights'..." "Marriage rights for homosexuals. We've managed to secure them in Freeport, but no other city recognizes the licenses." Sahe was nonplussed. "Homosexuals can't have children together. Why would they need to marry?" "Things work a bit differently here than in Scorned lands. Marriage provides all sorts of legal benefits--even tax breaks. Besides, legal recognition means societal recognition, which means societal acceptance." "So, how do you fit into this? You're not a homosexual." "I've learned it's a bad idea to explain that on the first date. Let's just say I'm an ally." Sahe took a closer look at Kyrie's face--small nose, flat forehead, rounded cheeks (as close to rounded as Blessed got, anyways...) Figures, he thought. Not like I care too much what he's really got in his pants. Aloud, he said, "I'd be happy to talk about something else. I'm sure you're wondering about that crystal." Kyrie grasped eagerly at the proffered lifeline. "Are you a crystal- worker? Why'd you decide to come to Blessed lands?" "I'm a merchant by birth. My father bought a time crystal to sell on the black market, but he found that I had a talent for using it. I came here because licensing is easier--I just need to get through a few classes..." -- -- -- -- Astra and Alban returned in the afternoon, when the others were gone from the clearing. That was good. Alban couldn't have done this with them watching. He couldn't remember a time when they hadn't been together, Alban and Astra, the front of the alphabet. She'd been the only girl in the order more devout than him, and she'd strengthened his resolve to follow the will of the Divine, even as he'd grounded her, kept her mind on the most practical ways of carrying out that will. He'd planned this for years-- even had the ring picked out, though he'd never managed to save enough to buy it. Yet, now... "You're afraid," Astra said. It wasn't a question. "You know me too well." He cringed inwardly, but what else could he have said? "The Divine trusts us to do this. I know that means as much to you as it does to me. So let's..." "Let's go slow." He lifted his hand to her cheek. "We'll start with touch." It wasn't Astra's body--not in more than the loosest of terms. Even the bones in her face had changed shape, from harsh Blessed angles to a curved wispiness, like she would blow away in the wind if her surface area wasn't so small. If there was anything of Astra to be seen in this curiously womanly man, it was in the way she moved, turning her cheek against his hand, trying and failing to hide her own eagerness to be touched. There was only so much to be done with hands, of course. Lips took their place, his meeting hers, then traveling down her chin and resting in the hollow of her neck. (He thanked the Divine that she hadn't grown a beard. There was only so much he could handle.) When he broke away, she wordlessly stripped, and this time, only eyes were used. His gaze traced down her flat, hairless chest, past nipples and belly button to the thing between her legs, the thing his mind just couldn't process-- That was a lie. He ran his fingers down her abdomen, past the soft white hair at the base of the organ, and along it to the tip. It was strange, but it was hers, and he could accept it as part of her. He stroked and petted it, cautiously at first, and the sound of her moan was like a hymn to the Divine as it grew under his fingers. "There's something I want to try," he told her. "Give me a moment to undress first. I'll lie back, and if you sit on my chest..." He had accepted her strangeness; now it was time to accept his own. He guided her cock between his breasts, pressing them around it, just as he'd seen in one of the books he'd stolen from under Horace's bed. He couldn't quite manage to lick the tip, but she didn't seem to care as she relaxed atop him, letting him massage the sides. "You're... awfully good at this," she managed to say, but she did little else but moan until she suddenly spurted, drenching his neck and face like she'd upended a bucket over him. It was then, as liquid magic soaked into his skin, that he finally said what he'd wanted to say for years. "Astra, I love you. Will you marry me?" She looked like he'd just hit her with a brick. "I'm sorry. I should have known you'd ask this." He didn't quite process it at first. "I've loved you since we were children, Astra. I've been waiting all that time to say this. It doesn't matter how much we've changed." She said it bluntly, with no room for doubt. "Grand Priests mustn't love." "But--Astra--you--" Even in his shock, he recognized the tone of an impending religious lecture. "If I was just a High Priest, I'd be happy to make a match with you. I am sure that you would raise our children up strong and wise. But I don't think I can have children with my body like this, and even if I could, my duty is to the Divine." She softened her voice, seeming to realize that she was getting carried away. "You remember the parables don't you? How Grand Priest Silas fell in love, and fell from grace? I can't just ignore the rules set down by the Divine." "So... this was just so I could become a High Priest. You don't feel anything more for me than that." "I respect you as a fellow follower of the Divine, and as my friend. Even if you sometimes need to be corrected." His whole body tensed, and for a moment, he was completely still. Then he raised his fists and hammered at her chest. "Get off me! Get the fuck off me!" Astra (September 16, sunrise) Those of Void have a natural discipline (some would say indifference) that makes them difficult to tempt or sway. Energy's focus will do you a world of good, but Shadow will make you lose track of your motivations. --The Primer of Talents "What are your terms?" Astra asked. They were gathered in the clearing, at a time when most of them would normally have been at prayer. To the sides, four faces showed varying mixtures of worry and excitement. Sahe's expression was hidden under his padded helmet, but she knew his determination mirrored her own. "Three matches, each to first hit," he told her. "If you win all three, I'll do whatever you want. If you lose even one... Well, I won't do what you want. We'll use what's left of the runes as our combat circle--no leaving it, and no calling in friends. Everything else is legal. Do you accept?" "If I told you two not to do this," Merritt asked, "would either of you listen?" "Just watch," Perrin said. "Sahe's going to lose the first two rounds, then come up with some crazy last-ditch plan to win the last one." Astra ignored them as she took a position at the edge of the runes. "I'm ready to fight. Horace, you can call the start." "Go!" Horace shouted. "Pulverize her!" Alban added. Astra wondered which 'her' was to be pulverized, but as Sahe advanced with alarming speed, she strongly suspected it was herself. She'd never watched him fight before, and she wasn't certain what style he'd use. Now that he'd backed her against the edge of the circle, she wasn't sure he had a style at all. Her thoughts seemed to speed up and slow down at the same time as she parried one attack after another-- downstroke, sidestroke, sidestroke again, and then a ramming blow that she barely blocked in time. She was acutely aware that there was no way her new body could keep up with this for long. Well, if skill wouldn't work, why not psychological warfare? "We were wrong about everything," she called out. "Eh?" he asked, easing off from his assault. "What are you--" Her downstroke knocked him flat. "Clever," he groaned. "Round one complete!" Horace declared. "Break it up, and prepare for round two!" This time, she didn't let him back her up. "Why do you think it changed?" she asked as she circled around him. He made no answer, other than to turn and block, but she continued, "Why can we use magic? A woman and a Scorned?" As he pressed his assault again, "I don't think it changed at all." This time, he made sure to backpedal. "I don't understand." "Who would have blessed us, if they thought we couldn't use magic? And since they'd never bless us, we'd never learn we could. The Divine is broader than we ever imagined--" He tried to cut off her speech with an over-the-shoulder blow. She dropped to one knee to block, then swept his feet out from under him. "Round two complete!" Horace called. "Come on, Sahe, you can beat her!" Alban called out. Sahe positioned himself at the edge of the circle, waiting for her to come to him. "Anything more to say?" he asked, in a tone that strongly suggested "Any last words?" "I don't think there's a difference," she told him as she advanced. "Between Blessed and Scorned, or men and women--" With a flash of light, she found herself motionless. She struggled to speak as Sahe approached. "Out with the old, in with the new!" he shouted as he rammed his staff into her chest. Her muscles didn't respond again until her back hit the dirt. "You--you-- " she coughed. "Told you!" Perrin crowed. "Crazy last-ditch plan!" "I wanted to see if I could beat you fairly," Sahe explained. "I couldn't, so I beat you unfairly. Anything goes, remember?" He saluted her as formally as any opponent. "I am a man. The Divine can't make me a woman. And it can't make me a slave." Merritt was the one who broke the resulting pause. "So that's that?" she asked. "You got the shit beaten out of you, and used... what was that, a time crystal... to beat the shit out of him, and now you're just going to walk away?" "Those were the terms." "The terms were that you wouldn't just do what he wanted. At least give us a chance to talk this out. Astra's not as bad as you think he is." "There's nothing to say. You have your ideas, I have mine. No one I know and love would want the Divine to come back--" He paused, as if something had just occurred to him. "I need to talk to someone. Not any of you. I'll tell you what he says." None of them were able to catch up to him. "I'd suggest nailing her feet to the ground," Perrin said, "but it'd be like trying to catch the wind in a bucket. All we can do now is wait and see what happens." The Decision (September 16, afternoon and evening) "What's this about, Sahe?" Kyrie asked. Sahe had asked him to come to the edge of the woods. All she'd said was that this discussion wasn't appropriate for The Boar's Head. "I think I've found your why. You, too, are a man in the body of a woman. Am I correct?" Kyrie reddened. "Most people don't catch on this fast... Wait, 'too?'" "The past two days have been strange for me. A woman named Astra asked me to join her in a ritual..." In her terse fashion, Sahe unfolded a story that strained Kyrie's belief. When she'd finished, Kyrie stared at her--no, him--for a very long time. "Let's pretend I buy this," he said. "Why are you telling me about it?" "In Jovan's time, your protest could never have happened. Without magic, the world's slowly getting fairer." Sahe bowed his head in Kyrie's direction. "Each of us was born lesser, and refused to be lesser. Together, we can decide whether magic should come back." "Wow," Kyrie said. "That's... quite a big question. What you're afraid of is the Church of the True Divine, right?" "What do you mean?" "You'll need Astra to bless new High Priests, and new Void priests. She'll run the church, and she'll have the say. But you'll be able to bless new Energy priests, and you don't care about the church. This 'Alban' will bless new Light priests, and it sounds like he doesn't care about the church anymore. Just bless everyone you see fit, and let Astra bless who she sees fit, and I think things will work out." A pause. "I'd like to see the Divine, anyways." "Why? You've lived all your life without it." "I'm Blessed. I've grown up with stories of a world full of magic. It wasn't always fair, but they say it was beautiful." He smiled ruefully. "Besides, I have a personal stake. I'd like to see what this magic will do to my body." "I can't say I'm happy with what it did to me." Kyrie did something then that he hadn't planned at all. He gave Sahe a hug. "It's not really so bad, to live like this," he said. "You're still a man in your heart, just like me." He snuggled his body against Sahe's. "These pillows of yours only make you cuter... I'm kidding! I mean, I'm not kidding! I mean, ah crap, you know what I mean!" -- -- -- -- When Kyrie arrived in the circle that evening, he was confused to see five robed men standing quietly in a row. Then one of them called out, "Drop the illusion," and all of a sudden, they were five naked women. "Simple magic," the largest of them called. She was tall and strong, a red-haired warrior, but her voice was quite familiar to Kyrie. "Once we've blessed you, we'll show you how it works." "So, you went through with it..." I was just humoring the cute crazy girl, Kyrie thought. I didn't think it was real. "I did it with Astra. I hope I never have to again. I told her about you, and she said whoever wanted to could try to bless you." She gestured to the rest of the group. "I was able to talk everyone into it except her." "We figured we'd pay you back for getting Sahe to do this," a plump brown-haired girl said. "Magic for magic, you know?" "So, how do I get blessed?" "We wondered that, too," a perky Scorned girl said. "Astra has a cock, so the magic comes out of that. But we don't, so..." She squeezed one of her nipples, and Kyrie was alarmed to see a drop of glowing liquid trickle out. These are five guys, just like me, Kyrie reminded himself. Of course, they were five guys who looked enough like girls to give him a metaphorical boner. Five guys who looked like girls, and lactated magic... Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained, even in the depths of insanity. Upon their instructions, Kyrie undressed, letting his robe fall to the ground. He made his approach to the newly changed Sahe, and she pressed his head to her breast. It was a struggle at first to swallow the warm liquid, but the taste wasn't so bad--oddly spicy, but not bad-- "Nothing? Energy must not be your element. Your turn, Alban." This girl's body was all angles and no curves, almost a parody of how a Blessed might look to a Scorned. But her hair was rich and golden, and her milk was sweet. This time, Kyrie felt the change instantly, flowing through his head to the tips of his hair, then farther down his body, as something grew out, out, out... Released from Alban's grasp, Kyrie looked down to disappointment. "That's it?" he complained. "Just a dick, nothing else?" "Your hair's yellower," Sahe said from behind him. For her size, she was surprisingly quiet when she moved. "I'm sure you'll change more as you gain power. Besides," giving his nipples a tweak, "if I have to have breasts, you have to have them. "You know," Kyrie remembered, "they say Light doesn't go with Energy." "I'm willing to share. Who wants to give his cock a try?" The tiny blue-haired girl didn't even need to bend over to take his cock in her mouth. Behind him, Sahe moved her fingers lower, circling them around a familiar hole just below--"I wonder whether both parts come at the same time." The plump girl used her own fingers to make sure the blue-haired girl wasn't left out--"You HAVE to try this next! You won't believe how much she stretches!" Off to the side, the Scorned and the ultra-Blessed were making their own fun, the former's head between the latter's legs. Kyrie had never been very religious. But at the moment, he couldn't help but see the Light--not to mention listen to her moans. And with Energy and Cessation both doing their best to make him come, he couldn't have been more certain that he'd found the Divine.