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The Mirror by: Sylvia Wechsel Note: Thanks to John Hill for revising the text. I suppose now it is more acceptable. There are no major changes in the plot, only English was improved. Sylvia. Synopsis: The small surviving crew of a research and exploration starship, destroyed in an accident, is stranded on an ice-covered planet. The conditions are sufficient for them to remain alive, even in comfort, but there is no hope of rescue. During explorations they discover a portal to another universe, which looks like a mirror. The only problem with this portal is that whoever travels through it has his or her gender reversed. Notes: - This story is intended to take place in the same fictional universe shown in "Wildworld", but not in the same timeline. (I guess it is set between 400 and 600 years before the events described in "Wildworld"). The two stories are unrelated, so they can be read in any order. - There is sex, of course, but it is not the main point of the story. I'm more interested in dealing with the way different people adapt to a gender change and, in the present case, things like authority and duty. - I'm not an English-speaking native; I used the orthographic correction facilities of my editor, but it is possible that some errors or weirdly constructed phrases remain. I ask you to read the stories with generous eyes and, if you wish, you can e-mail me suggestions to improve the writing. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ The mirror Chapter 1 -- The accident Captain Rogrs watched Lieutenant Simms place on the floor what he supposed was the last crate salvaged from the "crash landing site." Seeking to confirm his suspicion he asked, "Is this the last one?" "Yes, there is nothing more left to save from the containers," answered the young and beautiful blond woman, with a sad expression in her face. Captain Rogrs could well understand that sadness; he felt the same way thinking about the 658 comrades who lost their lives in the accident. It was ironic that he, the Captain, was among the only six members of the crew who survived the crash landing of the once mighty research and exploration starship Aghaton on this sterile and barely habitable icy planet. Of course the term "crash landing" was a euphemism. The starship itself broke into small pieces which burned up in the atmosphere during reentry. They were in the process of recovering the contents of several special landing containers which were automatically deployed before the Aghaton's destruction. He felt guilty. He would rather have died with his ship, but one of the Marine guards on the bridge had brutally thrust him into the last available escape pod and launched it before he could protest. It was useless to think about that the punishment the Marine might receive at a court marshal for manhandling a superior officer; the guy was long dead. Besides his, only five other escape pods made it out of the disintegrating starship, which quickly disintegrated after that meteorite impact. It was ironic that a tiny object could destroy such a large high-tech structure, but this was a known risk in space travel. Being small, it was not detected in time and, due to simple misfortune, it hit an Achilles heel in the structure causing its collapse. A half meter to the left and that meteorite would probably have caused decompression in only one hull section and they would now be, surely, mourning fewer lost lives, not to mention that they would probably be able to return home. The fate of the storage containers was much better. The automatic systems in the ship took care of deploying all containers as soon as the emergency state was recognized. Most of them successfully landed close to the descent sites of the pods. There was no time to choose were to land, so they ended up in a very large (hundreds of kilometers large) mountain range. The automatic landing systems, however, made sure that no pod or container landed on cliffs or other in dangerous areas. Anyway, it would have been preferable to land in a plain field, but one could not choose such things. They had quickly found the caves were they were now building their base. The six survivors would probably even have a comfortable life, since energy, water and food were guaranteed. That is, comfortable except for the fact that they were trapped on a desert planet in the middle of a severe ice age. Distracting himself from these depressing thoughts, he asked, "Did you set the beacon?" "Yes, the subspace beacon is transmitting well, but you know..." answered the Lieutenant, who, in spite of her low rank and age, was now his second-in-command. He knew what she meant. It was a very long shot to think that someone would detect that signal. The emergency beacons, which produced a small, but distinctive distortion in the space-time continuum, able to travel 100 times faster than the light, were designed for conventional missions in the inhabited portion of the galaxy, not for the long-term, deep space exploring missions like theirs. Loosing ships was a commonplace in such circumstances and since they had no pre-established flight plan nobody would be looking for them. It was just funny that the zero-point-field-powered beacon would be transmitting long after they were all dead; it would be quite useful for locating their corpses in the far future. "Don't lose faith, it's not good for morale," he said. Simms acknowledged with a nod of her head as she move away, leaving him alone again in the storage area of their cave base. Rogrs thought he might well use his own advice. *** The first few months after the accident were used for healing wounds, machine maintenance and setting and organizing their "barracks." The caves were sufficiently large and long and all six members of the crew found a way to get some privacy. Besides him and Lt. Simms, the crew consisted of medical officer Langr, nurse Maeda and Privates Woelson and Smid. Woelson, who broke his leg during landing, was by now healed. The surviving crew was, therefore, in good shape. In the beginning the task of setting up the power generator, the hydroponic farms and the science and medical laboratories was demanding and no one had much time to think about their situation. Once these tasks were accomplished, however, the surviving crew faced the worst challenge they would live with in the future: boredom! It didn't help either that the landscape of the neighborhood of their cave was so uninteresting -- an ice-covered mountain range which extended to the horizon in every direction. It was soon clear to Capt. Rogrs that he needed to find a way to keep up morale among the crew. He missed having someone to talk freely about this problem. Langr would have been the logical choice, but Rogrs couldn't stand him. In his opinion he was an arrogant bastard. Langrs' feelings towards Rogrs were reciprocated. Maeda. Woelson and Smid were too young, as young as Simms. His second-in-command would be responsible for them -- but she couldn't help him, in spite of being a trained officer. Her inexperience didn't inspire confidence. Ironically enough, she was the one who suggested the solution to him, unwittingly, of course. One day she requested to speak with him and made a suggestion. "An exploring expedition?" he asked. "Yes, Smid and I want to explore the nearby mountains," she answered, pleading with her eyes "I have to do it, or I'll go crazy." At first he was unsure about the usefulness of such an expedition, but he then realized this was the opportunity he'd been seeking and, considering that it would be a two-party expedition, it would be a good way to give Simms some command experience. She would need that in the future, since he was not a young man anymore and some day, not so far in the future, she would become the leader of that crew. He knew, however, he couldn't easily give up or everything would be lost. He said, "OK, but this expedition mustn't take more than a week. Then you'll have to return to base, rest for a week, and then prepare a new sortie." And so their explorations started. As Rogrs suspected, nothing special was discovered in the first three expeditions, but the moral of the crew improved a lot. The captain decided everybody but he should participate, including Maeda. Langr, who was as experienced as himself, decided he preferred to "stay home," as he said. The most useful results of these three expeditions were the installation of weather sensors on distant mountain tops and a star chart of the night sky Woelson sketched in the second expedition. Of course they had access to better astronomical databases, but it was nice to locate some of the familiar constellations in the sky, comparing them with the slightly different configurations they found in their homeworld. These astronomical observations also helped in determining the duration of the day and the year on this planet, which were not very different to what they were used to. This situation changed, however, when, surprisingly, Simms and Woelson returned from the fourth expedition with stunning news. Chapter 2 - The ruins Simms explained, "Woelson was responsible for the discovery. He noticed some weird-looking rocks on the other side of the valley. "We went there to investigate and found the entrance to a cave. It's obviously artificial, and ancient." Even Rogrs felt excited about the news. If the planet hadn't been desert in the past perhaps there were people still living here. Simms had, correctly, only made a brief investigation of the ruins and then returned to the base. They decided everybody would go out the next day to continue that investigation. They spent three days in the ruins. They were clearly ancient, and alien. This would be an exciting finding if they could share it with the others in their home planet. In spite of all space travel, mankind had never found alien life other than simple microorganisms. The crew found out that the ruins were a long network of galleries which extended deep inside the mountain. There was no way to tell how ancient they were, but since no other artifacts were found, they concluded they should be at least 100,000, perhaps even 1,000,000 years old. The high altitude and the prevailing cold, which partially closed the entrance with ice, had prevented everything being buried in dust. The first impression was that this exploration would bring no other findings beyond their own existence, but then Maeda found out a room which was clearly some kind of control room in the complex. The room was bare except for a large mirror on a wall opposite the door and a few remaining traces of furniture which had turned to dust in the distant past. At the left side of the mirror there was some writing scratched in the stone wall, probably with the help of a sharp rock found close by. Two things could be easily concluded about that writing. First, it was clearly much more recent used than the ruins themselves, perhaps less than 500 years old, and second, it was clearly of human origin: somebody had dwelt there before. The human origin of the writing was clear, since the alphabet used was an archaic version of the galactic employed in the five hundred inhabited systems. The language was unknown, but, at least they could read it. The discovery placed the "visitor," who wrote that, as a member of the first diaspora wave, when mankind first left the almost mythical "earth" and occupied the stars of the local neighborhood, before the dark ages reduced everything to ashes. The "visitor" was, probably, some stranded survivor of a previous expedition, just like themselves. The language was unknown, but a simple search in the archaeological database in the base computers allowed it to be translated. The writing was surprisingly simple and laconic. It read: "The portal opens every 23 sidereal days. It brings you to the mirror world which is more clement than here, but beware of the changes." Rogrs understood that the person who wrote that was a leader, perhaps a captain like himself, and that it was an instruction manual he (or she) wrote before going through the portal, the last one to abandon the ship. The crew discussed what to do and they decided a three party team would explore that portal the next time it opened. Simms would be the leader. Woelson and Maeda would complete the team. The idea, of course, was not to risk the whole crew, in case there was some danger on the other side of the portal. They decided to camp on site in order to identify the 23rd day of the message: there was no clock and no countdown, so they needed to stay alert, at least until the first time it opened. Langr and Smid returned to the base, while Rogrs remained with the expedition team. At midday of the 7th day they observed a strange light forming in the mirror. It was the portal. They had no idea how long it would remain open, so they decided to depart quickly. Simms and Rogers remained with the subspace radio connected, in the hope that a message could be transmitted from the other side of the portal. They entered the strange light and disappeared. Rogrs was anxiously watching his radio, waiting to receive an eventual communication when something appeared in the display, a written message: "We arrived OK, but..." At this moment the light disappeared. The portal was closed again. Chapter 3 - The mirror world The 23 day period that followed was the longest Rogrs had lived through in his life. As the end approached, Rogrs went with Smid to wait for the exploration team. Precisely at midday of the 23rd day, the portal lit up again. Soon a human shape formed and they saw Simms pass through the fluid surface of the mirror. She stood there, probing her body as if to see if something was missing and then the portal closed again. Worried, Rogrs asked, "Where are Maeda and Woelson?" "They decided to stay," answered Simms. This was something Rogrs feared would happen; the bounds formed by the military discipline were loosening. He was aware he could not keep up strict military discipline indefinitely, but he was surprised that at the first opportunity two crew members had already deserted. Simms' behavior was also different, more assertive. She was still respectful, but she was clearly no longer the inexperienced officer who had left 23 days before. They returned to the base, and when all four were reunited Simms made her report. "There is a village. According to the legends, the inhabitants are survivors of a colonial expedition which arrived long ago via a light bridge, surely meaning the portal." "And what sort of place is it?" Langr wanted to know. "As far as I could understand, it is approximately this same place, but in another time. "The same mountains can be recognized, but the tops are rounded and the valleys are covered with soil, I couldn't measure, but I have the impression that their height above sea-level is also lower than here" completed Simms. "Do you mean this portal is a wormhole which communicates with the future?" asked Smid. "I'm not sure, it could be the past also, some time before the elevation of these ranges." "What did you mean with the approximately this same place?" Rogrs wanted to know. "The mountains are the same, but they are on the opposite sides, like a reflection in a mirror. I guess the other side of the portal is located in an alternate universe, with a different chiral symmetry relative to our own." The reunion continued for quite long time. Simms told them more details about the society in the village, which seemed to have regressed to a pre-space, even pre-industrial, agrarian society. The climate was cold, but milder than here. The soil was fertile, and the village inhabitants raised some animal stock, which was also imported from this universe. According to Simms they even brewed some decent beer. The others raised the question of Maeda and Woelson, but Simms, reticently, only said again that they had adapted on the other side and decided to stay. Simms suggested that everybody should go there, and those present realized she too was eager to return. Rogrs, though, was not happy with the idea of abandoning his base. It was settled that when the portal opened next Rogrs would return with Simms to the other side to assess the conditions, while Langr and Smid remained in the base. Only after his return they would make a decision whether to move permanently or not. *** That night Rogrs was alone in his quarters when Simms approached and asked to speak freely. She said, "I want to ask you for a personal favor" "Tell me what you want and if I can I'll do it," answered Rogrs. After some hesitation, the girl went on, violently blushing, "I want to make love with you" This obviously surprised Rogrs a lot, so Simms decided to explain better, to justify her request, "I'm still a virgin and there are no other candidates here." "There are Langr and Smid" he replied. "Langr is not my type and Smid is my subordinate, I wouldn't feel comfortable with suggesting something like this to him" She didn't seem to realize she was his subordinate too, so the moral question she raised against having sex with Smid applied to him as well. Rogrs tried once more, "Why didn't you do that on the other side? "As you said, there are many other males there." "I can't," she answered, violently blushing again, and continued, "There is no way to explain this to you, but it must to be with you." Rogrs concluded that the girl had some crush on him. He, himself, found her attractive and in the past he had secretly desired her. He knew the moral objections were completely useless in their situation and, frankly, he was willing. So he replied, "OK, how do you want to do this?" The girl didn't need long to decide what to do next. She quickly began to shed her uniform, exposing her nicely formed breasts first and then her pubic area. At the sight Rogrs felt his penis becoming hard and decided to undress himself. Naked, he approached her and kissed her mouth. She laid herself on the ground and Rogrs lay over her, kissing her again. She opened her legs and Rogrs penetrated her vagina. She was tight and Rogrs felt his excitement building. She was moaning with pleasure and they continued until she obviously had an orgasm. Soon after that Rogrs had his own orgasm, not caring about contraceptive measures. They were not important anymore. After they finished Simms thanked him, took her clothes, and left. She didn't say a single word about it in the whole time until the next portal opening. This puzzled Rogrs and he felt a bit used. Chapter 4 - The other side of the mirror When the 23rd day arrived, they went to the portal again. There was no need for an escort so Simms and Rogrs went together, alone. On the way she spoke for the first time about what had happened between them. She thanked him and said it had been very important to her. Rogrs was still a bit hurt, but decided it was not worth mentioning. They arrived at the portal shortly before midday. Few minutes after that the mirror lit up again and they went through. Rogrs first saw a very bright light, and when it faded he felt dizzy. Something was not right and he needed some time to recover himself. After he regained his senses he saw a strange man wearing a military uniform like his or Simms'. She was nowhere to be seen. Then he noticed something was wrong with his body. There were some strange weights in his chest. As he moved, these weights bounced, and only then he realized they were breasts. In shock he investigated further down and found that his penis was gone, he was in a girl's body. He had a dark curly hair which was down to his shoulders. Still not believing what had happened, he asked (in the strange girl's voice he now possessed), "Who are you, where is Simms, what did you do to me?" "I'm Simms," answered the man, with a powerful deep voice. "The portal, I've no idea how, changes the gender of everybody who comes through," Simms said. Rogrs also noticed that Simms looked older than she was on the other side and he, of course, looked much younger (perhaps something like 20 years old). He said, "You mean, Maeda and Woelson are...?" "Woelson is now an eight year old girl and Maeda is a mature, 40 year old blonde male, almost two meters tall," Simms answered before he completed his question. "It was like this, the other time?" "Yes, it seems the persona you acquire here is always the same in both universes." "Why didn't you tell me this before?" "Would you have believed me if I'd told you or, worse, would you have come?" Probably not, he thought. Then he realized why it was impossible for her to make love as a woman on this side of the portal. Rogrs was disappointed; he'd really though she cared for him. When he confronted her, she said, "Please, don't take me wrong, it was nice and I enjoyed very much. I had to see what is like to make sex as a girl. That was only possible on the other side and I thank you for that, but now I know I prefer being this way" pointing at her body. Rogrs was still furious about the betrayal, but it was pointless to continue arguing. Rogrs investigated the room, which was a close copy of the room of the other side, only with the difference that everything was reversed. For example, the entrance was on the opposite side, as he remembered it. The writing was still there, but it was now on the right side of the mirror. Rogrs observed that the writing was practically the same as in the other side except for one word, which was in the place of the word 23 on the other side of the portal. Simms, seeing what he was looking at, went on, "Yes, the time also runs differently on this side. This word means the portal at his side opens every 437 days; the time here runs over 20 times faster than in our own universe." This caught Rogrs off guard. Not only would he have to stay as a girl for a time, but it would be for over a year, even though only 23 days would pass on the other side. Getting to what she wanted, Simms took over control and said, "We have to change clothes. Last time we arrived at the village wearing our uniforms and they found it strange, especially Woelson wearing an oversized uniform "The natives have no idea about the portal, but they'll get suspicious if we keep appearing wearing wrong-sized uniforms. We have to hide our high tech stuff here and play the part of some strangers coming from very far away." Rogrs saw that his own uniform looked awkward, way too loose, and Simm's looked too tight. It didn't please him, but he understood the need of secrecy about the portal. Then she continued, "I hid some clothes here last time. Here they are; since I didn't know what you would end up after the transformation I brought dresses in three different sizes. Here, take this one, I think it will fit you." Against his will, Rogrs undressed, seeing for the first time his naked female body, and took the garment Simms handed him. It was a leather dress, with some kind of wool lining. There was nothing like panties or a bra, and, seeing him puzzled, Simms said, "They don't use those kinds of things here, so you only need to put this on. Here, let me help you." Simms helped him to put one foot and then the other into the dress, pulling it up over his body; she then tightened the straps at his back, forming something similar to a corset. The dress was a bit tight, especially around his breasts, and it produced a very prominent cleavage and a thin waist. Simms gave him moccasins and Rogrs put his tiny feet into them. Simms changed too, into pants and some kind of leather shirt. Then she said, "It is important that you address me as a man and I will address you as a woman. This is a patriarchal society, so it's better that you walk behind me and that you only talk to answer my questions, at least in the presence of the natives." Rogrs understood what she said, but he felt humiliated, mostly by the authoritarian tone she addressed to him. It didn't help either that his new body was some 20 cm smaller than Simms' and that she was now, evidently, much stronger than he was. In an improbable violent altercation, he would be on the weaker side. They left the ruins, Rogrs walking in a submissive position behind Simms, and went in direction of the village. Chapter 5 - The village As soon as Rogrs set his now tiny feet outside the ruins he felt disoriented. As previously described by Simms, the landscape was recognizable, but what was "left" in the other universe, was now "right," and vice versa. Noticing his confusion, Simms said: "don't worry, soon you will get used with this." Rogrs felt irritated, he was used to being the one in charge, not the contrary, but now the situation was inverted. Now Rogrs was the "rookie" and Simms had lived over a year in this place. She had more knowledge than he did about this universe and he had to acknowledge that. They followed a path down the cliff, in the direction of the valley, which in the other universe was a deep canyon. Two scenarios could be devised to explain these differences. Either the landscape of the other universe was a result of terrain uplift and the canyon resulted from rock fracturing and water erosion, or the present landscape was the result of erosion after the advance and retreat of glaciers through the valley. None of them had sufficient training in geology to settle the matter, but in both scenarios there would be millions of years of difference, either more or less, in the geological times between both universes. Other differences were apparent. The most dramatic was the existence of vegetation. Pine trees, bushes and grass could be seen everywhere in the valley. Rogrs also noticed what he thought were sheep and cattle in the distance. As Simms explained, the other stranded expedition which arrived here thousands of years before was composed of settlers, and settlers brought seeds and animals with them. Probably everything he saw here was imported from the other universe. Rogrs was wondering whether the animals also suffered a gender change when traveling the portal and concluded this was probably the case. Whatever the technology behind that portal, it would surely be unable to distinguish between humans and other animals. Rogrs speculated that this would probably extend even to plants and microbial life forms, provided their gender could be defined. They walked for about 30 minutes until they saw the first signs of human beings. Soon after that they came to the center of a small village of wooden farm houses. Simms was greeted by others and spoke with them in a language Rogrs didn't understand. He concluded it was the descendant of the language of the first settlers. Not being able to understand the conversation, Rogrs observed the people. They were, of course and as expected, humans, but showed the normal damage of life in a low technology level society: scars, disabilities and other problems which, in his own universe, could well be solved by plastic surgery or using cybernetic prostheses. From time to time Simms referred to Rogrs in her conversation; she was probably inventing a story to explain his appearance. Rogrs was distracted with these thoughts, when he felt someone tugging at his skirt. He looked down and saw a little girl, who, after getting his attention, discretely said, "Captain?" Rogrs was puzzled. How could a little girl, who looked about 10 years old, know his language and recognize him as the Captain? Soon, though, the truth hit him like a lightning bolt. "Woelson?" "Yes, sir" Rogrs was in shock, the Woelson he knew was a 1.80m tall, muscle-covered, man, and what stood in front of him was a weak girl wearing ponytails and a dress. It was clear to him that his own appearance, as a young woman, was considerably different than what Woelson remembered. About this time Simms was finishing her explanations to the locals, which included kissing a woman carrying a young child, who Rogrs concluded were Simms' wife and child. Rogrs wondered what would the woman do if she knew what had happened between them in the other universe -- probably nothing good. After Simms got some privacy again she said to Rogrs, "We must talk," and then to Woelson, "Go call Maeda, we will meet in the townhouse." The girl ran out of their sight and both Rogrs and Simms walked toward a tall building which Rogrs concluded was the their destination. Chapter 6 - Life in paradise When Woelson and Maeda arrived, Rogrs had another surprise. Maeda was now a tall blonde man, looking about 40 years old. He (Rogrs cold not think of Maeda as the girl she was in the other universe, anymore), was at least ten centimeters taller than Simms, which made Rogrs look like a dwarf in comparison. He had beard and mustache and was dirty from, the Captain supposed, working in the fields. The contrast between the tiny girl Woelson was and the large man that Maeda had turned into could not have been more striking. It was clear also that Maeda was not happy about the meeting. Rogrs felt that the former girl was pretty much comfortable in this new life and everything that reminded him of the girl from an alternate universe was disturbing. The four of them formed a very weird group -- two tall men, a woman and a young child intently discussing very serious stuff. If anybody was watching this, they wouldn't understand a thing. Simms made a movement to start talking, but then Rogrs decided it was enough, he cleared the throat and ordered, with most authoritarian tone he could maintain in that girl's body, "Report!" Simms reacted the way Rogrs expected. The years of military training switched in and she started telling how the crew adapted in the new situation. As expected, the gender transformation was uncomfortable in the first days, especially for Woelson. Simms had taken control of the situation as soon as she'd recovered her senses and the three of them had started to investigate the ruins. Woelson, who had been in charge of the "sciences," used his hand computer to translate the writing and, at first, all of them were as upset as Rogrs was to discover that they would remain in these new bodies for at least for 437 days. If the waiting period had been shorter, probably all three of them would have returned to the other side at the first opportunity. They had walked out of the ruins and soon found the trail which led to the village. Their first encounter was strange. The locals had never seen strangers before and the different language didn't help either. They did, however, have legends about other villages dispersed in that world, so they first concluded the strangers were from one of those villages. As the crew learned the local language, they decided not to correct this assumption. They correctly concluded that it would be too difficult to explain to those simple peasants the concept of an alternate universe with reversed genders. They learned the local language with the help of a lady, Nayla, who was an informal teacher in the village. The three of them remained together, but it was clear that they could not remain simply as guests in the village, abusing their hospitality, for long. So they decided to try to blend in and collaborate with the local activities. Simms, easily recognized as a leader, was appointed as counselor by the village leader, whom the three of them called "mayor," and helped in the administration. Maeda, due to her large muscular body, was appointed to work in the fields and received a small farm to administer. She was upset at first, but soon realized she enjoyed the agrarian life style. Woelson joined the other children in the village and was placed under the care of a local family, who had recently lost their daughter of similar age in an accident. In the first months they met in secret, but soon they decided this was not necessary anymore. The first one to adapt was Maeda. He began referring to himself only by his male persona, adopted the first name Jonn, and began courting a neighbor's daughter. They married less than three months after their arrival and she (or better, he) was already father of two children, a 15 months old boy and three months old girl. Woelson adapted next. The constant love "her parents" (in the child's words) dedicated to her, had an effect, and the initially shy little girl soon began behaving like a normal child. It happened that Woelson never had a proper childhood in the other universe. He was an orphan since an early age and was raised in orphanages until joining the military. This was the first opportunity Woelson had to know what it was like to have a loving family. She adopted the first name Marie, which was the name of the half legendary great-great-great-grandmother of Woelson in the other universe. The last to "give up" was Simms, and this merely two months after Maeda married. He began dating the mayor's daughter and soon the girl got pregnant. They had to marry in a hurry. Simm's son was born shortly after the portal was active again and he had to leave his pregnant wife to travel to the other universe, Rogrs could understand how hard this had been. Simm's position as counselor and the fact that he was married to the mayor's daughter made him the next in line for succession of the village's leadership. Simms adopted the first name Mark. What had begun as an organized debriefing ended up as an informal chat, where the three members of the crew told all this to Rogrs in a completely unorganized way. In the end, all three of them turned towards Rogrs, and Simms said, "We jointly decided to call you from the other side, because we believe everybody should come here, there is no sense in staying there." This was, of course, not merely an opinion. They were simple declaring what they had decided to do. It was clear to Rogrs that he had been kidnapped, the only question was if they would allow him to return to the other side when the portal opened again. Simms continued, "The locals use only personal names to refer to themselves, your name will be Gia. I've already told this to everybody. Rogrs felt this as a blow to his male ego. Gia was a quite feminine name, and since Simms had already told this name to the people in the village there was nothing Rogrs could do about it. "You will be sharing a room with Nayla in her house, she is the teacher we mentioned before. "She will teach you the local language, so you can adapt." It was pointless to argue. Rogrs knew he was at a disadvantage. At least they didn't try to force him the get a husband or something worse. Living with another woman, even considering that he would need to behave like a girl all the time, was surely a better option. Rogrs could only wait for the next portal date and hope that the traitors would let him return to the other universe. Chapter 7 - Nayla Woelson and Maeda left the town house to resume their affairs, while Simms and Rogrs walked to another part of the village. Rogrs, as usual, was in a subservient position behind Simms, but this didn't prevent him attacking. "I'm disappointed with your betrayal" "Sir, please, don't look that way, we are doing this for your own good, for everybody's good!" answered the former Lieutenant. "If you are expecting that I will simply forget my old life and adapt here as a girl, you are mistaken" "Sir, I swear to you, when the portal opens again you will be allowed to return if you want" said Simms, and then continued, "I only ask you to respect our decision to remain in this community, and for that, you must behave as the girl you are now" Then he concluded, almost in a conspiratorial fashion, "We must refrain talking freely in our language now. Nayla is very clever and she already is able to partially understand us." Concluding thus, they arrived in front of a farm house, which Rogrs presumed was Nayla's. Simms, without ceremony, opened the door and entered. Rogrs felt uneasy with this invasion of privacy, but followed Simms into the stranger's house anyway. Rogrs was surprised by the house's interior. It was beautiful. It was a wooden house, as he already noticed of all the other houses in the village, but the walls were decorated with intricate bas-reliefs showing pastoral scenes. There were also other items of decoration, like porcelain pieces and intricately-decorated furniture. All pointed to a quite exquisite cultural level, which didn't match the simple house's exterior. It was clear to Rogrs that this couldn't be simply inheritance from the settlers' culture from 2000 years before the present; it was too long ago. This must be some local development, which meant that they had, at least, specialized artisans and a pottery industry. When Simms talked about Nayla, Rogrs constructed a mental picture of the teacher as an elderly lady, probably fat, wearing glasses and quite unsympathetic. The reality could not have been more different. A very young girl, with shining long black hair, came from the inner part of the house, drying her hands on a towel. She began to smile and said, haltingly and with a terrible accent, but anyway, in their language, "Hi Gia, nice to meet you, I'm Nayla" The girl was very beautiful, and young. In fact she very much resembled Rogrs'female body. She could have been his (or, better, her) sister. Rogrs empathized with the girl at first sight. Simms soon excused himself, saying he wanted to see his wife and left both "girls" alone. For first time since the portal Rogrs needed to hide who he really was, and this increased his stress level. The girl didn't notice, or, perhaps, found it quite natural that "the girl" was feeling uncomfortable. She decided to show Gia the house, which was not so small as Rogrs thought at first. It was a nice house. The exquisite decoration of the living room was present in the other rooms too, with other motifs. When they arrived in a sleeping room, Nayla showed Gia her bed. The two girls would share a single room, so Rogrs would not be able to relax even during at night. She opened a wardrobe and showed some dresses, similar to the one Gia was wearing, and said she had chosen them for her, since she knew Gia (Rogrs) had come without baggage. This finally made it clear to Rogrs that he would need to behave like a girl all times, at least until he was able to return to the other universe. He decided to start to refer to himself in his female persona, adopting the name "Gia," and this way he hoped to avoid problems with Nayla. In his mind, he was Gia with Nayla and the other villagers, while with Simms and the others he would still be Rogrs. *** The first days after the arrival were the most complicated. Gia wanted to be mean to Nayla, but she couldn't. The girl was simply too nice for that. Particularly in the first days the others avoided being with her. Once, on one of the rare occasions when she met Simms (or, better, Mark, as he wanted to be called), Gia confronted him and was told they'd decided to do this so that she could learn the local language faster, but Gia suspected their true intent was to make her adapt faster to the life as a girl. Nayla began right at the beginning teaching Gia her language. She already had some experience, acquired when she taught the others, so Gia quickly progressed. When Nayla realized Gia had no idea how to do some basic female activities, like taking care of her hair, or applying the kind of natural make up they used, she decided to teach Gia these thing too, and Gia could hardly refuse. Gia began helping Nayla take care of the household affairs. She couldn't let the girl do all the work alone while she lay about. Soon she was mastering things like house cleaning and doing laundry, which weren't much different from what he'd had to do in his military life. They were, however, not alone in the house. Nayla was a widow. She'd married, as usual for that society, when she was 14, but her husband had died in a hunting accident after three years of marriage. Since Nayla hadn't gotten pregnant, a rumor spread that she was infertile, and this, together with her advanced age (17), left her a spinster. She didn't care too much about that. The activity she had with the children compensated for the lack of her own and she enjoyed the freedom of not being married. In that patriarchal society, however, it was unthinkable that a girl live alone. So she moved back to her father's house, a widower himself. His name was Wenn and they had a good relationship. He was not interested in intervening in Nayla's life and she didn't care what her father did or didn't do. He was a mine worker and usually spent many days away from home, so Gia and Nayla had plenty of free time by themselves. About a month (of the mirror world) after her arrival, an incident occurred, which would have strong repercussions in Gia's future life. She was walking with Mark, as they usually did, when Mark's wife, in an obvious jealous attack, came in their direction and began arguing with him. Gia hadn't mastered the local language yet and, trying to avoid problems for Mark, murmured the word "sister" (meaning she felt like a sister to Mark). Kari (this was the woman's name) suddenly grew still, and began apologizing. She understood she was Mark's sister. The whole village soon got used with that idea and the "travelers" (as they called themselves) decided not to correct this mistake. Chapter 8 - Wenn The months went by and Gia quickly adapted to the routine. She started helping Nayla with the children at the school and found out that she was not only the local teacher, but acted as a pediatric nurse as well. Soon Gia was mastering almost everything Nayla did and helped her do these tasks. This was a great help to Nayla. The village was small, but not that small, and Nayla, before Gia arrived, had to take care of more than 40 children (including the former Woelson). The crisis started 296 days after Gia's arrival. One of the children, a girl, became seriously ill after an accident and Nayla decided to spend some time at the girl's home to help in her recovery. Gia contributed, assuming the teaching tasks and taking care of their home, which she now had to do by herself. Around that time Wenn returned from the mines in the mountains to spend a few days at home. He was acting strange, but Gia was already aware of the mood changes that Wenn showed from time to time. As if by magic, Wenn's normally taciturn mood changed like water turned to wine at the prospect of his impending return to the mines. Singing and smiling, he asked Gia if he could pour her some tea. Tired of the heavy atmosphere that hung over the house during those days and also, of course, by her work with the children, she agreed. The tea was delicious. The herb tasted a bit like lemon grass, but slightly different, she could feel it. She drank and began feeling dizzy. The feeling was like getting drunk, but with the difference that she was not numb, she was perfectly aware of what was happening around her. She began noticing things in Wenn that she never did before. The size of his arm muscles, the tall body, even his bald head and the remaining white hairs he still had there fascinated Gia. Wenn started talking, and mentioned how beautiful Gia was. These words made her blush. Deep inside she knew this was wrong, but in her state of mind the compliment felt very nice. He moved closer and soon they were kissing each other. Wenn was not forcing himself on her, she was willing to kiss him too! As he inserted his tongue in her mouth, she did the same to his. Their activity became more intense. Wenn released her breasts from the dress and began fondling her nipples with his tongue. Gia soared to the clouds. Never before had she felt such an intense pleasure, but the best was yet to come. Wenn helped her to take her dress off and led her to the bed, where she laid herself down. Wenn teased her clitoris with his fingers and, without warning, inserted his index finger inside her vagina. Gia, surprised, began moaning, while with her own hand she continued fondling her nipples. She felt her vagina becoming wet in anticipation of what was to come. Wenn took his own clothes off and Gia admired his rock hard penis thinking, excitedly, that it would be inside her soon. She opened her legs, offering her pussy to him. He lay over her and pressed the head of his penis against the entrance of her vagina. Gia was afraid. She wanted this, but she feared it would hurt. His penis entered, however, without resistance, except for the fact that she was very tight since she was still a virgin. The first time his penis slid inside her she held her breath. The sensations were intense as his penis opened the channel which led to her uterus for the first time. Then he stopped and began moving in the other direction, pulling out of her. Gia became desperate; she wanted to feel complete again. He reversed the movement, however, just before leaving her, and thrust his penis deep inside her once again. He repeated the rhythmic movement over and over again, and each time Gia's pleasure increased to a new level. They had sex for something like 20 minutes and Gia had at least three mind-blowing orgasms. Then he reached his climax and Gia was excited by the idea that he was filling her insides with his cum. After they finished Gia felt tired and moved to the other side of the bed with a smile in her face. *** Next day, Gia woke up with a huge headache. First, she thought the memories of the previous day were a dream (more likely, a nightmare), but then she noticed her bed showed signs that someone slept at her side and there was a bit of blood on the sheet close to her hips. Then, like being hit by a lightning bold, she realized: the bastard did drug her! She looked everywhere in the house, but he was gone, as well as his mining gear. She drank the kind of coffee the villagers cultivated and ate some bread and, after that, the headache subsided sufficiently so she could leave the house. First she sought out Nayla. When Gia told her what happened, her friend was devastated. She said, "I cannot believe he used the love herb on you!" Nayla then explained the "love herb" was a powerful hypnotic, native to this world. It left the victim in a suggestible state of mind and increased the libido. In the past its use had been tolerated, since there was a general need to increase the population, but for ages it had been forbidden. Everybody considered its use as equivalent to rape. In a short time Gia's situation became known to the whole village. A wave of sympathy came from everyone. If Gia had some doubt that Simms and the other travelers had something to do with the whole affair, their concerned faces showed that Wenn's actions were his own and nobody else was to blame. Wenn never returned. Perhaps he felt ashamed for his actions (or he felt afraid to return and receive his punishment), or perhaps he was simply dead. The mountain regions were dangerous and it was commonplace that miners went to work there and never returned home. Gia knew she should feel hurt or traumatized, but she felt only anger. Anger against Wenn and anger against herself, for being so easily deceived. Nayla took it harder. She felt responsible for her father's actions despite Gia's assurances that she was innocent. The worst part, however, was yet to come. A few weeks after her rape, Gia began feeling sick, and it was soon evident to everyone that she was pregnant. For Nayla, this was a very weird situation. Gia's child would be her brother (or sister) in spite of the fact that Gia looked younger than she. The time for her return to the other world approached and Gia felt that the other travelers were avoiding her. Finally she confronted Simms, already showing the first visible signs of her pregnancy, and the answer she got made her angry again. "I don't think it is a good idea that you return now!" said the former lieutenant Her argument was that Gia was pregnant and nobody knew what would happen if a woman with child went through the portal. A naive answer would be that the baby also changed gender, but Rogrs would surely not be able to sustain a pregnancy in a male body. Gia argued that Simms broke the promise, made when Gia arrived, to let her return at the first opportunity. Simms argued that in the other world this would correspond to a delay of only 23 days, but for Gia this would mean that she would need to live another year and a half as a girl and, worse, as a pregnant girl then as the mother of an infant child. Gia tried to fight for her rights, but the laws of the village did not favor the opinion of a girl. Ironically, if Wenn hadn't disappeared he, as the father of her child, automatically would have acquired the status of being her husband. Wenn was a bastard, but Gia knew he would let her go. In the absence of a husband or a father, the decision would be made by her closest male relative, and this was her "brother." So, Gia had no other option but to remain in the village. On the day the portal would open, she was discretely placed under house arrest by the other travelers. That day she cried out of sheer frustration. Chapter 9 - Being a mother After that it was Gia's turn to avoid the other travelers. She isolated herself in her life with Nayla, who helped her deal with her pregnancy. On the surface, Gia acted as though she was upset with the situation, which was perfectly understandable, considering the way she'd gotten pregnant. Secretly, in her life with Nayla, Gia enjoyed the new sensations and the opportunity to produce a new life out of her body. Sure, there were annoyances too. The worst were the morning sickness, which thankfully, disappeared after the third month, the constant annoying pain in her hips, and, as the pregnancy went into the final stage, the large belly and the constant need to pee. There were also nice feelings though. First, there was the abstract feeling that she had a live being inside her. These feeling became concrete as the baby started kicking and moving inside her belly. Her breasts also nearly doubled in volume. Gia didn't tell this to anybody (not even Nayla), but she kept a perfect memory of the pleasure she felt under the influence of the drug and secretly started masturbating. The increased sensitivity of her nipples was a bonus. Labor began, and finished 72 hours later. The fact that she was doing it at home almost alone (with only Nayla's help, who'd never experienced childbirth either), didn't help either. Gia suffered like hell and at each new contraction she cursed Wenn, Simms and the other travelers once again. She felt relief when her son finally left her body. After a moment of suspense the baby started to cry. He was a healthy boy, something that was far from being taken for granted in the precarious conditions of that society. The village had cows and goats, and they were used to produce milk, but it was unthinkable that she not breast feed her son, that option was reserved only to women who could not produce enough milk to feed their children, and this was not Gia's case. Simms visited Gia when she was doing so for the first time, soon after the birth, and asked what his name would be. Gia's answer was, "Rogrs..." The name was unknown in the village, and it was a blow in Simms' guts, since it was a proof that Gia hadn't forgotten the former lieutenant's betrayal. For the first months after her son's birth Gia lost herself in the routine of taking care of a young baby; only Nayla had some contact with her. She could lie to the others, but not to herself; she loved her child. As the baby grew older, subtle things amazed Gia: the first time he held her fingers with his small hand, the first time he smiled at her, his reactions to the hide-and-seek game, as old as the own mankind. After what she perceived as a long while (but in fact was 10 months) the young Rogrs was crawling and soon after that he was walking and calling her "mommy." After that it all became more difficult. It was one thing to think about abandoning a young baby who would barely remember his mother, but quite another to leave a child who knew she was his mother and would possibly have recollections. The worst part was that she was still eight months away from the day the portal would open again (and everyday her son would develop further). This remembered her that it was time to begin to replace breast feeding with some solid food in his diet, to make the transition easier. As the return day approached, Gia became more disturbed. There where occasions when she decided she would stay in this reality, assume her role as a mother and forget her duties as Captain Rogrs in the other universe, but most of the time her resolution came back. On the critical day she left her home early. She kissed her sleeping son on his forehead for what she thought was the last time, left a note to Nayla asking her to take good care of her son (who was, by the way, Nayla's half-brother), and went to the portal. She was surprised (and afraid) as she found out Simms was there expecting her, but the former lieutenant (and prospective future village mayor, as Mark) just wanted to be with her at the transfer. As they arrived at the portal, Gia took off her female clothes and dressed in the oversized Rogrs' uniform. Simms used the remaining time trying to convince her to stay, but after some time the former lieutenant gave up and said only that all the remaining crew should come through the portal; this would be their last hope of survival. The travelers would keep clothes ready in the portal room, in case they decided to come. Precisely at midday the portal lit up and Gia stepped in, disappearing in the glow. Chapter 10 - Back in the freezer As Rogrs reappeared on the other side, he was relieved to discover he was back in his male body. He was disoriented, of course. After almost three years living in the other universe he had adjusted to the reality there. He was also freezing. The climate in the other side was cold, but not ice cold like the ice age universe he'd returned to. Finally he decided to adventure, seeking the way to the base using his memory. He arrived and after a brief explanation, Rogrs gave a full report about everything he'd gone through on the other side of the portal. At first he thought about omitting the part about the rape and the pregnancy, but he decided it was his duty to tell everything, so that no one would be deceived ever again. He was surprised that Langr didn't use the opportunity to make fun of him, and even seemed sympathetic to his ordeals. Perhaps living in isolation helped in developing his character. *** Life resumed its pace, the three remaining members of the crew dedicated to the base maintenance duties and to the science labs. Rank had no meaning anymore. Rogrs and Smid shared the hard tasks equally. Langr, being older and the only one with medical training, was freed from cleaning duties (except in the improvised sick bay, which he maintained by himself, as he preferred), and working in the hydroponic gardens. Hard work was even welcome, without it they would fall into boredom again. In his personal time Rogrs was dedicated into writing a detailed description of his time in the other universe, in form of a journal. He did it mostly to pass the time, not expecting anyone would ever read it. It was also an opportunity to write frankly about his mixed feelings. Everything would fall into this routine, and the others would be forgotten, had it not been for Langr's illness. He suffered from a degenerative heart disease but, being the jerk he was, he didn't say anything until the day he collapsed and was found, only by chance, four hours after the fact when Smid went looking at him. Rogrs and Smid had basic medical training, but it was not sufficient to treat the old man. Their only hope would be calling Maeda back. She, at least, would know how to operate the medical gear. The problem was that calling her meant that one of them would need to travel to the other side and spend more than a year as a girl. Smid reluctantly agreed to go, at Rogrs' urging. The captain knew that if he went to the other side he would not come back. It was already three months after Rogrs' return, so his son would be about five years old by then. He knew he would be in no condition to abandon his son once again. Smid traveled to the other side and 23 days later he returned, accompanied by Maeda. She was changed. The formerly shy Asian girl had given place to a self conscious, almost arrogant, woman. She reminded Rogrs more of the tall Jonn, rather than the girl she had been. Smid was disturbed and the reason for that was revealed by Maeda, in a mocking tone. When the private traveled to the other side he'd turned into a very beautiful 13 or 14 year old blond girl. This meant that she was of marriageable age. Rogrs, as Gia, was too old to be disturbed (except by Wenn, but this did not count) and Woelson/Marie was too young to marry (but would soon be old enough). Smid, though attended by Lara, was the right age to attract the attentions of horny teenagers. So the girl had to spend more than a year fleeing from prospective suitors. Rogrs could imagine how difficult this had been, since he was supposed to behave like a girl. In spite of this "attack" the "girl" managed to remain a virgin the whole period. Maeda felt uncomfortable as a girl, but she returned out of her friendship with Langr (it was implicit that she would not return for either of the other two). With her help and the use of the medical equipment Langr's condition improved slightly, enough for the old man to regain consciousness. Maeda stated that the only way to heal him was if he traveled to the other side. The idea was that by doing so he would gain a new body and, as in all previous cases, the conversion of a male into a female would probably be followed by age regression. Langr dismissed this idea and affirmed he was more comfortable with the prospect of dying as a male in his own universe. Rogrs previously would have attributed this to the prejudices of the old man, but after unwillingly living more than three years as a girl on the other side of the portal, he now felt sympathy for his position. The crew discussed the possibility of bringing him across against his will, but it was unnecessary because Langr died a few days before the portal opened again. The three improvised a grave close to the base entrance and Rogrs, as the Captain, gave the burial speech. In the few days left, Maeda discussed with Rogrs the traveler's hypotheses about the portal. There was no clue about what technology was involved in that machine. The gender change seemed to be a facet of traveling from one universe to the other, but they had no idea how the machine selected a new body at the other side. They thought perhaps that the body was selected at random out of an available pool, and that it would be stored again as they traveled back -- according to Maeda anyway. Simms believed that, in any case, the body would remain in inanimate suspension when not in use and his assumption was that this body apparently didn't age (hair and fingernails didn't grow, in spite of the long period of "storage," for example). Finally it was time for opening the portal once again. Maeda told the other two she would not return anymore and that she thought both of them should go to the other side, since there was no mission anymore. *** The two remaining members of the crew continued their routine, but in greater isolation. One day Smid disappeared. Since it was close to the day the portal would open, Rogrs suspected he had gone to the other side, but he might also have gotten lost outside the base or perhaps have committed suicide. He couldn't be sure, and there was no way to know without traveling to the other side himself. Rogrs was alone. The solitude didn't bother him, but reinforced his dreams. With increasing frequency he woke up at night after a dream in which he was still Gia. Sometimes he dreamed of his son, sometimes of Nayla, but sometimes he dreamed about making love with Wenn and on these occasions he woke up covered in sweat. Another 23 days passed and he received the unexpected visit of Simms. The girl decided to make a last try to convince him to return. She (or better, Mark) was about to assume the mayor's office and this was the last opportunity she would have to disappear for a long period of time. Rogrs discovered, half relieved, half disappointed, that Smid had indeed traveled to the other side. Lara was now happily married and, at the time Simms left her, she was already six months pregnant. The two of them talked informally. There was no point of sticking to ranks anymore. Simms was obviously much more experienced now and had turned into the leader Rogrs once believed she would become one day if she stayed in that universe. Rogrs, however, said he was not ready to abandon his post, much to Simms disappointment. She went back, and this time there would be no coming back. Rogrs followed her to the portal room and in the last minute, when she was about to pass the portal rim, he finally said that one day, perhaps, he would go. Afterwards he returned to the base. Chapter 11 - Epilogue Time passed and Rogrs' loneliness increased. Finally he conceded that his sticking to the idea of the mission was an excuse. He was really afraid of giving up his maleness and embracing the life of a female and mother. With time he realized that this was just prejudice. What was the point of being male, of being the ship's Captain, if there was no one else to share his life? He missed his son, he missed Nayla and, (why not?), he missed the other travelers. Finally, seven months after his return, he decided without regret that it was time to return to the other side. Before he could go, however, he needed to perform his last duty as Captain. He went to the command center and recorded a last entry in the ship's logbook, programming it to be displayed automatically if the base was activated in the future, "Captain Rogrs, commander, senior officer of research and exploration starship Aghathon, recording 503 days after the accident. "This message is intended for any possible rescue missions that come after us in the future. "As you will read in this log book, we found out a portal, evidently built by an unknown alien race, which leads to a parallel universe. This other universe has some peculiarities (the most critical being that whoever travels through it reverses his or her gender). Details of these experiences can be found in the other files in this system, including my own personal recollections. There is no point keeping secrets anymore and I don't feel my maleness is threatened by conceding that I enjoyed the experience of living as a girl at the other side. If there were a point I would remain here, but the only thing I could do here would be dying and, in this context, I prefer returning to my life as a girl. "There is no point coming after us. If ten years pass on this side we will all be dead due to the time-dilation effect of the other universe. You may, perhaps, want to check about our influence on the other society. The climate there is hash, but not so harsh as here, and I believe the stagnation of that society is caused only by the fact that the population grows so slowly. I will take with me as much technology as I can, to help them to develop medical knowledge and to increase the productivity of their farms. Perhaps it will be possible to develop that society, which may die out if we don't succeed. "I, however, intend helping not only with our technology. I've already decided I will do my best to get pregnant, since new babies are there necessary. The extra personal we introduced in the village, and the fact that Simms is the mayor, will probably be the key factor. It would be nice to check out the results. Tomorrow the portal opens again. A