The Hendrick's Inheritance Part I free porn video

The Hendricks Inheritance Part I William Hendricks III was annoyed at his father, and not for the first time. The old man was infuriating every time he went and saw him, and always seemed to wind him up in some way. At times like this there was only one place that he headed for some solace. Normal kids probably had a best friend they'd go to for letting out their pent up rage, but William Hendricks was no normal child. He was the heir to the Hendricks fortune and had been brought up in a very particular way so as not to socialise with those of a lower class. So he'd turned to the one person who he knew who had a sympathetic ear for him: his Aunt Daphne. His Aunt was about ten years younger than his father was and she had still kept some of her youthful vigour over the years. William suspected that she dyed her hair blonde and used a lot of product to keep her skin smooth. She would however always listen to him and make him tea, just as she had now. She had not been around throughout the first ten years of his life, but had come back home from living abroad in India for a number of years with her husband. She had moved back home into the cottage on the far side of his father's estate when her husband died. "Sit down and tell me what's up now, Willy," she said calmly as he burst in and went straight to put the kettle on. "My father told me that he not getting me a car for my eighteenth. He said I'd only crash it and waste the money." William fumed. His Aunt Daphne sighed. "You know that your father is quite ill. From what I've heard he might not last the year out." His Aunt told him as the kettle boiled. "Good, couldn't have happened to a more crotchety old bastard," William vented. Aunt Daphne pour the water into the pot after first warming the pot, before stirring in the tea. Most commoners these days used tea bags, but not his Aunt, who still made tea properly. "You wouldn't wish your father dead would you? I've had my issues with how he brought you up, but he's still your father." His Aunt advised him. "Does he know that? He treats me worse than a misbehaving puppy. He dotes on Cynthia, but won't give me the time of day." William continued. Cynthia was William's half-sister. He'd only found out about her four years ago when her mother had brought her to their father's mansion and deposited her demanding years of alimony. Cynthia was kind and gentle and William had taken to her instantly. She was three years older than he was and seemed to be a calm voice in the household. When William had sparked one final blazing row with his father last year, he'd left home and gone to live in Cynthia's flat with her. William wished that she hadn't gone on her grand tour of Europe for six months as he'd have another shoulder to cry on. As it was after this visit he'd be heading back to the flat on his own. "You two just rub each other up the wrong way. I know whose fault it is, but your father's getting old now. I've never got on well with Jeremy and we haven't spoken for years, but that doesn't mean that you can't get on with him," Aunt Daphne told him. "If it wasn't for the inheritance I'd tell him where to stick it and go out and do whatever I wanted." William stated boldly. What he wanted was partying, drugs and girls. Being as he was heir to a fortune, he got them all when he wanted. He was starting to develop quite the reputation. "Now, now - even you need to moderate things, Willy. I've heard of other young men who've gone entirely off the rails. I'd hate to think that you were heading for an early death like Lord Kindlesham did last year when he overdosed." His Aunt handed him the bone china cup of steaming brown tea. "No, I'm careful Auntie. I know what I can handle," William replied confidently. "Well anything that you can't handle, just come and let me know. I'm always here for you Willy." Aunt Daphne pursed her lips and sipped her tea. *** It was several weeks later, just after his birthday that William woke up on his half-sister's floor with a pool of vomit next to him. The night before had been a blur. There was some girl, though he wasn't sure that he remembered her name. Rachael maybe or Rebecca. Probably began with an R, although now he thought about it, it could have begun with a 'C'. It wasn't relevant now. She'd been a good fuck and he'd been completely out of his skull. His father had sent him a card with a ?20 Amazon voucher in it. The fucking old tosser couldn't even have got him a proper present. William hauled himself up and went to wipe the sick away from his face. As he headed towards the bathroom, William spotted the mail had already been delivered and he went and collected it on the way to the bathroom. Having cleaned himself up, William set about opening the mail. There were three envelopes that William was confident contained late birthday cards from his so called friends. Having opened them he was proven right. Splodger, Carter and Eric were 'friends' he'd known since Prep School, yet none of them was able to write much of a message in their cards, merely wishing him a good birthday and signing their names. William wondered what had happened to them briefly, but then dismissed it as not important. There were three other puzzling letters in the post as well though. One was in a brown envelope that looked like something official and the other two looked more like party invitations, except that they had black corners on them. The return address for the brown envelope was for somewhere in Italy. He decided to open that one first. Dear Mr Hendricks, It is with deep regret that I write to inform you that your sister, Miss Cynthia Hendricks, had an accident whilst travelling from Rome to Naples. The man who was driving the car that she was in lost control of it and sadly it plunged over the cliffs on the Amalfi coast. The car was a wreck, but some of her possessions were saved and will be sent back to you. The remains of the body will be shipped back to the United Kingdom next week for you to prepare your own funeral arrangements. I am afraid there is not much left to identify her now though. I am very sorry to put this upon you, but the funeral should be back in your own county according to European law. I hope that you can accept the deepest sympathies of the Italian Government in this difficult time. Yours, Giancarlo Francelli. [Italian Diplomatic Service] William was devastated. He didn't know what to do. The apartment was still filled with her stuff. There were pictures all around the place of her with her friends. His beloved half-sister was dead. He went back into the sitting room and sank down into the comfy sofa and cried his heart out. Eventually the tears dried up, and he noticed the other two letters still clasped in his hand. He decided that they might be something to do with the accident so he decided to open them. When he opened the first one, he was surprised to find that it was for Cynthia and not for him. He'd not bothered to check the details on the envelope properly before opening it. Dear Cynthia, My doctors report that I have less than a month to live. I want to discuss some things with you before I die, including the arrangements for my will and the terms within it. If you would call on me on Friday 16th September at two o'clock precisely then I will show you my will in the presence of my solicitor and will apologise to you for the past. Yours Faithfully, William Hendricks II William thought to himself sadly that this was a meeting that was never going to happen and decided to open the other envelope. He checked this time and noted that this one was addressed to him. The letter inside was much shorter. William, My doctor says I'm going to die soon. Come and see me one final time on Tuesday 13th September at noon. Yours, William Hendricks II Well, that was certainly shorter and less friendly sounding. William looked at the clock on the wall. It was 11am and what was worse, it was Tuesday already - he'd somehow lost an entire day! Well it had been a great Sunday night, so he wasn't going to go about with any regrets about it now. William called for a taxi and quickly went into his room to change his clothes whilst he waited for it to turn up. Well I guess I'll see the old bastard one last time and then all his money and title will be mine! *** The butler, Jarvis, had only been in service for five years now after the older man Hodgkins had retired. Still he knew William well enough and ushered the younger Hendricks into the study where his father was waiting for him sat in a bath chair that lately he had been confined to. "Ah, William... sit down. I'm not going to beat around the bush here but I'm not leaving you anything in my will. You've been a complete disappointment to me throughout your life and my private detective tells me that you lead a life of drink, drugs and no moral sanction. I will not pass the family fortune to one such as that to fritter away. Therefore you will get nothing from me. Given the change in hereditary titles was changed recently to allow females to inherit, the title will go to Cynthia as well. I couldn't be more disappointed in a son of mine if I tried. You may go now." The old man told him. "Screw you father!" William told the old bastard. "I'm sure that your desires will all blow up in your face." He was about to tell him that Cynthia was dead when he stopped himself. The old bastard would find out soon enough and hopefully the shock would kill him. William turned on his heel and headed out of the place he formerly called home. The taxi was no longer there when he got back, and had to call the cab company to get another cab back to his father's mansion. It was some fifteen minutes later that a taxi showed up, and William was by then considering cutting across the estate to his Aunt's cottage. Her cottage was just on the other side of the estate, but to get to it via the roads was a five mile trek around the local country lanes. "1 Cottage Terrace, mate," William told him. He was terribly upset, but at the moment he wasn't sure if it was because his father had cut him out of the will or because Cynthia was dead. His Aunt was the only one person he could rely on these circumstances. *** Aunt Daphne was not at home when he arrived, but turned up in her Rolls Royce about ten minutes after the taxi deposited him there. She slid her legs out of the car carefully so as not to let her flowery dress ride up and walked carefully across the cobbles in her sensible heels. "Oh, my dear William... whatever is the matter?" she asked. William looked up at her and burst into tears. After a cup of tea and several more emotional outbursts, Aunt Daphne finally got an understanding of the situation. "So, what you are saying is my awful brother has cut you off and that Cynthia has died in an accident in Italy? Oh dear, that's terrible news, but you do realise that he was probably going to give everything to her now." "Yes, and when he finds out that she's dead he'll have to give it to me!" William replied defiantly. "I'm afraid not." Aunt Daphne replied sadly. "He'll probably give it all to his charitable foundation as she's not alive." "What, you mean the bastard's going to give me nothing whatever?" William replied, his face red with anger. "Calm down dear! I think that there's a way that we can get you the inheritance and have the last laugh on your father." Aunt Daphne told William calmly. "What? How?" William was confused. He couldn't see any way he'd get a penny now. "What if Cynthia were still to turn up to the appointment on Friday?" Aunt Daphne asked him. "I told you, she can't, she's dead!" he shot back. "No, I know that dear," Aunt Daphne replied. "However, your father doesn't and neither do the authorities in Britain." "Yes, but she still needs to turn up on Friday to see the old bastard," William told her. "We'd need to clone her somehow." "It's worse than cloning," Aunt Daphne replied. "We also need someone who knows about her life inside out as well." "See I told you that it's a stupid idea." William continued. "You know all about her, don't you?" Aunt Daphne commented. "Yes of course. We've lived together for years, but unless it's escaped your notice I'm a man and Cynthia was a woman. That's a fairly major issue right there." "Well, there are things that can be done to change that." Aunt Daphne said cryptically. "Look, I appreciate the idea, but there's no way I am going to get dragged up and fool the old man. He's not dying of blindness and deafness." William sank back down in the chair. He appreciated his Aunt, but some ideas were just too silly to contemplate. "I have a friend called Heather," Aunt Daphne said with a twinkle in her eye. "She's a special effects expert at Pinewood. I bet she could work a little magic.". *** Heather, it seemed, was a brunette a couple of years older than Cynthia and had a very girly looking apartment in Notting Hill. William had only agreed to go there to show his Aunt that the whole idea was preposterous. His Aunt had insisted on coming along to ensure that William didn't back out on the appointment. William had been made to strip and shave all the hair off his body; he had drawn the line at waxing. Heather had put a corset around his midriff and tightened it until he thought he would never breathe again. Next she passed him a gaff and told him to go and put it on in the bathroom. "I'll come and help you if you need it," she shouted out. He stripped out of his boxers and, determined that he wouldn't need to have a woman play with his cock in front of his Aunt, worked out how to put it on for himself then walked out back into the living room, feeling funny with his cock stuffed underneath him. "Now we need to give you the shape of a young woman," Heather told him. She passed him some flesh coloured padded panties that had a fake looking vagina in the front of it. The panties went down to his calves and were filled in the hips and arse. Once William had them on he could see that his lower half now had the shape of a woman. Finally he was given a bra to put on that was pre-filled with realistic silicone breasts. With all this on he looked like a rather odd, female-shaped being with an obviously male head atop it. Heather spent the next ten minutes measuring up his new found body, though William could not fathom out why. "Your Aunt sent me pictures through yesterday and I've been working through the night on the mask," Heather told him. There was a football shaped thing on the shelf behind her under a cover. Heather turned and pulled the cover off. "Ta-da!" she said as she revealed the head of his sister with her lovely blonde hair atop it. The empty eye sockets looked back at him. William gulped and said nothing. He was still not convinced that this charade could work. "Come on, let's try it on for size," Aunt Daphne enthused. With that William sat down at a make-up table whilst Heather fitted the mask over his head and began to stick it down in place around the eyes, nose and mouth to give it a perfect fit. When he was finally able to open his eyes, a version of his sister looked back at him. "We'll need to make her up and put clothes on her. The undergarments will never pass fully as female unclothed," Heather said whilst looking critically as her creation. She unpacked the clothes that William had brought back from Cynthia's room in the flat and selected a white blouse, nude tights and a grey skirt suit for the new Cynthia to wear. Once she had it all on and the makeup was done they once again critically examined the new young woman. "Not bad," Aunt Daphne commented, "but Cynthia has blue eyes and larger teeth." "No problem - we have the technology," Heather replied cheerfully. She went into the other room and returned with a box and a smaller container that held lenses. She opened the lens case and made William put the lenses in. "These teeth may have to be a temporary solution. They won't be perfect." Heather told William as she took out a set of false teeth from what looked like a gum shield. William slid the false teeth in his mouth and was shocked to discover that he now looked close enough to his half-sister that would not make much difference. "There's only one problem left with this crackpot plan of yours, Aunty," William said in his own voice. "I don't sound anything like her." "Ring this number would you, Heather, and put it on speakerphone please" Aunt Daphne told the younger woman authoritatively. Heather picked up the phone and dialled the given number. "This is Cynthia Hendricks here. I'm afraid I'm not in at present so please can you leave a message for me after the beep thingie," Cynthia's voice came back. "Can you capture that and work your magic?" Aunt Daphne asked. Heather nodded and went into the next door room where there was a computer and lots of electronics. "Now we need to get you working on your posture. Women sit and walk differently to men, so you are going to need to start to practise, young lady," his Aunt told him. William couldn't help but notice that she was already using the feminine pronoun on him. About an hour later Heather popped her head back into the room. "Right I'm all done. We're going to have to lift up the mask and fit this underneath in the throat area." She told William. William could see that it was a small flat chip which was attached to what looked like tape. Heather lifted the mask at the neck and tapped the chip in place before refitting and sealing the mask back down. "Okay. Speak to me Cynthia?" Heather told William. "This is never going to..." William stopped short as he realised that the voice coming out of his mouth was no longer his, but now belonged to his half-sister. "Oh my God! I can't believe it." The new Cynthia turned from side to side admiring her curves in the mirror. She now looked and sounded just like his sister did. There was a chance that this crazy plan just might work. He could put all this on, fool his father on the day and then grab all the money. Cynthia grinned an evil looking grin as she had never done in real life. "You're going to have to wear this and practice over the next couple of days. You need to be her completely if you want a chance to fool your father. So no drink, no drugs and no going out socialising. You have to be her for the next two days and you're going to have to convince everyone in your apartment block that she really has come back home, both for them and for your own performance on the day. I want you to come round each morning to mine dressed like that and show me your progress." Aunt Daphne told him. "Yes, Aunt," the new Cynthia replied meekly. William knew it was his last chance to gain his inheritance. He got up to go. "Where do you think you're going young lady? You haven't even got your jewellery on and you've forgotten your handbag." Aunt Daphne said sternly. This was not going to be easy for him, but soon he knew that it would all be over. *** Friday came and the new Cynthia had come and gone to her Aunt Daphne's. The recovered luggage from Cynthia's hotel included her passport, and her summer clothes and swimwear. The remains had proven to be a pot of ashes that, William dressed as Cynthia, had scattered in the garden and said a little prayer for as he wept. When he headed back into the house he realised that his tears had caused all Cynthia's make-up to run. He had to wipe off all the smudged make-up and start again. William was still not very proficient with doing Cynthia's make-up, but he had at least learnt how to do a rather basic day-to-day face at his Aunt's instruction. Carefully he reapplied the make-up, looking at the clock to ensure that he wasn't going to be late. By the time he had finished, William had half an hour to get to his father's mansion. Cynthia's car was in the garage downstairs and her keys still on the rack by the phone. Whilst he technically didn't have a licence of his own, he knew how to drive and had had several lessons. The fake Cynthia locked the apartment behind her and her 3" heels clicked on the stairs and echoed up the stairwell. William's mind started thinking about hearing a sexy woman going up the stairs and watching her sexy behind as she moved. These erotic thoughts started a movement in his going that had not been the first erection that he'd received since wearing his half-sister's clothes. It was perhaps a hazard of the enterprise that he was engaged in, but later he would be able to relieve his inner tension at his leisure once he had conned the old man into giving her all the money. *** The new Cynthia strode confidently down the gravel drive towards the house. After she almost fell by misplacing a heel, the new Cynthia had to concentrate twice as hard at where she put her heel, meaning that she spent most of the time staring down through her cleavage at the red slinky dress she was wearing and the red three inch heels. Since she wasn't looking forward, the first she that Jarvis was in front on her was when she spotted his black shiny shoes and dark trousers. "Excuse me Miss Cynthia." Jarvis said politely as William had to pull up suddenly. "Oh, I'm sorry I was lost in thought, Jarvis. I can't believe that my poor father is dying." The words were not easy for William to say, but he needed to keep up the pretence of being Cynthia, plus he needed to keep the old man on side. "I'm afraid so, Miss Cynthia. He is in the drawing room. I will bring in tea shortly," Jarvis replied and disappeared off. It was just as well they hadn't got some other girl to dress up as her. She would never know which way was the right way to go and wouldn't know the staff or Cynthia's history with their father. Of course William didn't know everything, but he hoped he knew enough. The fake Cynthia stepped into the drawing room to find the senior William Hendricks sitting in his bath chair by the fire. He looked up and smiled. "Ah there you are, daughter. I'm so glad that you came. You are so beautiful and not in the least like that worthless half-brother of yours," William began. The younger William in his red dress was seething inside, but kept Cynthia's face smiling back at her father. "I'm just glad that I came back from my European tour early, Daddy. I don't know if I'd have forgiven myself if I'd not seen you before you died," Cynthia replied. "I'm glad too, daughter. Come over and give me a kiss." The elder William Hendricks told Cynthia. The younger William had no choice but to step carefully over to the bath chair and kiss the old man on his cheek. The old man smelt of TCP but Cynthia didn't comment or complain. "That's my girl. Now, do tell me that you've found a nice young man to settle down with?" the old man asked her. William had no idea whether Cynthia had found anyone since she'd been away. She'd had a few relationships before, but these were now in the past. "Not at the moment, Daddy." The fake Cynthia replied. William would never have called him 'Daddy', but he knew that was exactly what Cynthia called him. "Ah, shame, but we'll get to that in a minute. Did you have a nice time in Europe?" the old man asked her. William hadn't been round much of Europe so he hadn't a clue, but he had received some postcards from Cynthia so he knew where she'd been. "Oh, yes Daddy. I went round France, then to Monaco and then through Switzerland, Austria and into Italy. I flew back from Rome yesterday after Wills called me." William used her pet name for him to make it sound authentic. He couldn't believe that the old man was swallowing that he was really her. The door opened and Jarvis entered with a tray containing tea and sandwiches on his arm. There was another man accompanying him dressed in a sharp suit. "I have brought refreshments, Sir, for you and the young Miss Cynthia," Jarvis told him. The elder William nodded at the table and he put the tray down there. The butler poured the tea and passed a cup to the old man who held it awkwardly in his lap. The butler then passed a second cup to Cynthia which she took, but then looked around for a seat, eventually selecting the sofa to sit on. It was awkward sitting in her tight red dress with the tea in hand and William had to take in down slowly. He was quite impressed with himself as he sat down on Cynthia's fake posterior. "This is Mr Bloodsworth, who is my attorney." The old man introduced the suited man who moved towards Cynthia with his hand outstretched. William didn't know whether to get up and shake it or to remain seated. He decided that since he has tea in his lap that the latter was easier and reached up to shake his hand. The man had a strong grip. William decided to shake it weakly to try and portray a more feminine grip. "Pleased to meet you, Miss," Bloodsworth told her. "Likewise," the fake Cynthia replied simply. "Mr Bloodsworth has a paper for you to sign should you be agreeable to the terms of my will," the old man said gently. "You see I really want my line to continue after I die. I can't face the prospect of it going to one of my cousins, so I want to ensure that the fortune goes to my descendants. My son has been a major disappointment to me, so it falls to you to continue the line. I want you to have my fortune when I die Cynthia, but I want to tie to several conditions. You will get 10% of my fortune on my death and the rest will be held in a trust for you. When you marry you will get another 40% and on the birth of your first child, the trust will release the remainder of the money. If you accept these terms, then Bloodsworth has a paper for you to sign and make it all legal." The elder William Hendricks said to her. The fortune was all his, but it had catches attached to it! Still, if he just signed the paper he'd get 10% of the old man's cash, which was a lot better than nothing after all. That amount of money was just the compensation that he deserved for having to get dolled up as a woman. "Of course I'll sign it," 'Cynthia' gushed back at the old man. "The family name will be safe in my hands." Inside William was thinking something entirely different. "Oh, I'm so glad Cynthia. I knew that you'd do the family proud," t,he elder William told her. She sipped at her tea as delicately as she could and noted that Bloodsworth was already getting out a document in a folder for her to sign. Inside her beautiful red dress William was afraid. He had not practised writing Cynthia's signature, though he'd seen her write it a few times. Nervously he took the pen and using a light touch on the paper wrote something that vaguely resembled Cynthia's signature as he remembered it. "Thank you Miss Hendricks, I will send you a copy of the agreement in the post by recorded delivery," Mr Bloodsworth told her. He closed the folder and gave her a little bow before retreating out of the room. The idiot didn't even check the signature; he was home and dry now! "I'm so glad that you didn't have a problem with the terms Cynthia. The whole family fortune will soon be yours and my legacy will live on. Come here and let me give you a kiss," William Hendricks II said and then went into a coughing fit. The fake Cynthia had no choice but to put down her empty tea cup and move across the room to the old man. He gave her a toothy grin before she bent her head down for him to kiss her on the cheek. The old man put his arm around 'her' waist and patted her on the rear. "That's my girl!" *** The fake Cynthia couldn't wait to get out of the mansion as soon as she was able to make her excuses and get away. With her new found wealth, Cynthia decided to wait to tell her Aunt and went straight to the nearest pub to get a pint to celebrate. As she walked into the local village pub she realised how different things were for a woman. Her heels clacked on the wooden floor and all the old men drinking in there at lunchtime turned at the sound and watched her as she walked in. She could feel all their eyes on her derri?re as her hips naturally swayed as she walked. She was being watched, assessed by everyone in the room. The barmaid smiled at her, which was both friendly and scary. "What're you having, Cyn love?" The barmaid asked her. Shit. Cynthia is known here. They'll know that she doesn't drink beer. "I'll have the usual please," the fake Cynthia replied with a smile; at least that would not rouse any suspicions. The barmaid fetched a white wine spritzer, and Cynthia reached into her bag and pulled out her purse to pay. Her nails got in the way as she searched around the purse for a ?5 note and left it open to await the change. It was so much easier with trousers. Cynthia went and sat down in the corner sipping quickly at her wine. William felt uncomfortable and wanted to get out as soon as was practical. As soon as he'd finished the wine, Cynthia rose and left the local pub. She got into her car a little less ladylike than perhaps she ought to and drove straight to her Aunt's house. *** "I did it! Now I can get all this female clobber off and celebrate my new life!" William told his Aunt. It was still in Cynthia's voice but now his whole mannerisms and intonation were wrong now to be his half-sister. "Tell me the terms of the agreement again, please?" his Aunt asked. William, still in his female disguise, proceeded to tell her what his father had told him of the agreement. His Aunt continued to question him. "How do you expect to get a hold of the rest of the money then?" "Oh well... I didn't really," William replied casually, sitting on his Aunt's quaint sofa with Cynthia's legs apart showing her padding beneath her sexy dress to his Aunt. "Then the rest will be lost for good," Aunt Daphne replied. "It's just as well that I had Heather make you something a little special. We'll need it as well as a few more things if we are to pull this all off." "Pull what off?" William asked puzzled, suddenly sitting upright. "Cynthia's marriage and her children," Aunt Daphne replied. "Hey, I can't get married, let alone have any children. Remember, I'm not really a woman. These breasts are as fake as they come and I don't have a cunt, remember Auntie dearest?" William told her. His Aunt got up and went into the room next door. She returned with what looked like a fleshy pair of overalls with a zip down the back and a blonde wig attached to the top. "You don't yet, but with this you will. Heather has worked very hard on this and I thought that perhaps you might need it. I wasn't wrong and with this we can get you the rest of your inheritance - that is, if you really want it." Aunt Daphne turned the overall around and William could see that it had a lovely pair of breasts built into the chest and a very realistic looking vagina in the crotch with a shaped patch of blond hair above it. "No, no... this was just for today," William protested in Cynthia's voice. "You've done a fantastic job today," Aunt Daphne stated, "but I know you can pull this off and screw your old man out of his money. All it takes is a little more practice and you'll be a beautiful blushing bride." "I don't want to be a blushing bride!" William protested. "You'll get used to it and you might even like it. Plus, I want my cut on the money, so if you don't do it, I'll be forced to let Mr Bloodsworth know of the deception today," Aunt Daphne told him. "You wouldn't dare!" William exclaimed. "I would, you know that I would William. I just want the best for you, but I also want my piece of my miserable brother - just a 10% cut for helping you," Aunt Daphne returned. William realised that he was metaphorically screwed. There was a possibility he could go to jail for fraud if he was discovered perpetrating this deception. However if he didn't do it, he was equally screwed and would definitely go to jail. Soon though if he did this and got away with the whole deception he was definitely going to be actually screwed in a very real way. He wasn't gay - how could he possibly do this?