The Math Tutor
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Womanhood Is Not A Math Equation free porn video
Karen Carmack always thought that femininity and womanhood were more
than the sums of their parts to her. She found out that assumption was
wrong. Femininity and womanhood were the product of the factors to her.
This self-truth was devastating to her when she decided to get a double
mastectomy. Getting rid of those two mounds of flesh meant now she saw
herself kicked out of the sisterhood. One of the product was gone, so
multiply that with the rest of what she saw that made her a woman, and
the product became zero.
Triple-negative breast cancer, one of the most aggressive types, ran in
Karen's family and was the cause of death for her mom, Loni, and Loni's
two sisters. She got the double mastectomy as a preventive measure. If
the lady, who did not see herself as a lady anymore, knew how much her
self-identity was tied to those 4 pounds of glandular and fatty tissue
she would have taken the guarantee of a shortened lifespan.
Karen's friends and family were distressed over Karen being depressed.
It caused pain to all of them that they could not be more proactive in
helping their friend out of her darkness. All they could do was let
their light shine and hoped it guided her back from the night she'd been
living in.
It angered all the people who cared about her when Karen would talk
about how getting the preventive measure done was a mistake. They did
not understand that Karen learned a valuable lesson from her mom and
aunts passing away young. Life was not about the quantity of days but
the quality of days. With Karen feeling the self-imposed exile from
femininity and womanhood, she knew it would have been a much fuller life
if she had just accepted the three lemons she got from her spin of the
genetic slot machine.
The lady, who was waiting for death, was driving her husband, Seth
Carmack, crazy. She acted like that preventive measure she took was
actually the diagnosis of terminal cancer. Those two quit sharing a bed
or even the bedroom when Karen started to nest down in the living room.
Once Karen had her personal sanctuary how she wanted it, her days of
even pretending of wanting to go out where behind her. She would
pressure her husband into having a social life.
Seth knew his wife needed the space and reluctantly gave it to her. He
just made sure his social schedule became going over to friends houses.
He was not in the mood to interact with strangers, plus his wife would
ask if he met any ladies who he fancied when he went anywhere other than
just seeing friends. That question hurt Seth for he only fancied the
lady with the broken smile. It also hurt Seth because he knew Karen was
asking that question for she did not see herself as women enough to keep
him. She wanted the best for the man she loved and did not see herself
as it anymore.
Seth could not take the inactive approach anymore. He knew that his wife
was going deeper in the night and any light all her friends and family
was shining was further away. Also, less of those lights were shining,
the people who were not as close to Karen started to extinguish the
homing beacon they were holding. Those people could not put any more
time and effort into trying to help someone who was not helping
themselves.
Seth knew that if he didn't do anything soon he was in danger of his
wife being engulfed by a neverending night. Seth also knew that he was
not the best person to try to get Karen to open up. The times he tried
to press the subject, Karen would mention how a man could not understand
losing their connection to womanhood. If he pushed again, Karen would
bring up how he used to joke around about being a breast man.
That hurt him because Seth thought that his wife knew that his love for
her was about who she was as a person, not her breast size. The fact
was, the sight of a nice ample bosoms did please the man, but Seth did
not date or stay with Karen because of her breasts. It made Seth feel
like his wife was not secure enough in him and thought that her husband
found what was inconsequential as essential.
So, with the pain of watching his wife vanish into darkness and his
being pushed away, Seth called Karen's sister, Kira Brock-Nerys, to come
for a visit. He believed Kira was the only person which Karen would
allow to dive into her darkness with her. Also, Kira's light shined so
brightly it had to draw Karen towards it. The sad woman knew how that
her sister's bright light was almost put out years ago and loved being
around it.
Kira's name was fitting for the light she shined. People who had the
exciting hobby of onomastics, the study of names, would assume her name
was just an Anglicized form of the Irish name Ciara, meaning "dark-
haired". Kira was also the Romanized form of a Japanese name which meant
"glittery, shiny". Kira was a transgender lady, and picked it as her own
when she started to transition. Her finally coming clean to the world
got her out of the darkness she had lived in, making her become a
shining light to help others traverse their own darkness.
************
The day Kira got the call from Seth saw her arriving on her sister's
doorstep in Squirrel Hill, Pa from Seattle that night. She cursed
herself for not visiting sooner, but she waited until Seth called. She
knew she should have been more proactive in checking up on her sister.
Instead, she relied on Seth to judge how dire the situation was. Kira
knew the only time a man thought something needed immediate attention
were papercuts and stubbed toes, yet she depended on Karen's husband's
judgment on how her sister was really doing.
The first thing she did when entering Karen's nest was turn on the
lights and turn off the television. Karen not looking at who dared
disturb her sanctuary said, "Hey Seth, I was watching that."
"You were, but your baby sister came to visit."
Kira was three years older than Karen, but they called her the baby
sister. This was for once Kira quit trying to be who she was not, Karen
quickly took over the role of big sister to help Kira learn how to
embrace womanhood and femininity. Karen taught Kira all she knew about
makeup and beauty tips. More importantly, Karen helped Kira learn how to
better express her emotions. Kira was a natural at expressing how she
felt, but Karen had to help break down the communication barriers which
Kira put up to hide who she was.
"Baby sis, you should have talked to me before you came. Seth is making
a big deal out of nothing. It is just taking longer for me to recover
from that needless surgery I had."
"Karen, that surgery was not needless. You would have gotten cancer
sooner or later. Without the double mastectomy, it was not if you got
cancer, it was when! And if that cancer was not caught by chance right
away... well, you know what would have happened. Mom had a mammogram
three months before she found that lump. Six months after that Mom died.
The same story with her sisters."
"How can it be so easy for you to say it was not needless? You know what
it is like not to have breasts. I don't have any now and you do. When it
was the other way around, I did not downplay you wanting what I had. You
not feeling like a real woman without them.
I knew they would help you connect with who you are. I did not know they
were vital for that connection to be. I lost my connection to my essence
and you."
Kira took her breasts forms out of her bra, "Sis, I am not telling you
that you are wrong for wanting something I have. I never went through
with the hormone treatments. I never told you, but at first, I chickened
out of taking hormones. I was too scared about the cost of getting
breasts. Yes, it was only Aunt Viv who died from that aggressive form of
cancer, but how quick it was! I delayed being put on hormones. I saw
breasts as being as two time-bombs I would be strapping onto my chest.
Then I started the hormones and the double whammy of Aunt Carol and Mom
passing away in the same summer. I quit. This time it was not me being
scared of nothing, the threat of cancer was more than just a concern, it
would have been guaranteed if I kept up with the hormones. I told my
endocrinologist why I made the decision and she agreed it was the best
course of action."
"Kira, you just don't understand. I will never get to breastfeed my
child."
"I will neither and also I will never get to give birth. Instead of
looking at what you will not be able to do, look at what you will be
able to do."
"Baby sis, you don't get it. I will not have a child. Seth finds me
repulsive. He called you to take me off of his hands, so he did not have
to deal with me anymore."
"Karen, your loving husband called me for he was at wit's end. Seth does
not find you repulsive, you feel that way. You know that just how he
looks at you tells you that. How you have to chase him out of the house
tells you that. Where does he go? Over to Boilermaker's house to hang
out. Come on, Boilermaker did not get his nickname from going to Purdue.
That single man would hit the bars quick with Seth, but Seth does not
want to. He can't, he needs your light to shine.
That great man tries to be there for you and you keep on pushing him
away. He had to respect you not wanting to talk about it. No one can
make someone else talk when they don't want to. He doesn't know how to
handle it.
Me, I don't have to respect you not wanting to talk about it. You know
why? You were there for me when I was lost in the depression of not
having my body match who I was. You would not let me stay in that
darkness. You came in after me. I opened up to you only when you said I
would have done the same for you."
"Baby sis, I am scared that my relationship with Seth is just based on
my breasts. Mine were great, and he is a breast man. If I had not had
them, would he have ever even been interested in me?"
"Sis, that question does not matter. You two formed a tight, close
connection. A deep love. That is what matters. Seth is losing his hair
and that does not change how you feel about him."
"Yes, but I am not into hair."
"Oh come on sis. If Seth had a receding hairline when you met, would you
have given him a chance?"
"I would have been stupid if it didn't. He is the love of my life."
"Yes, he is the love of your life for who he is, so he is not in love
with you because of your breasts, but who had those breasts. You are the
same lady as before."
"Sis, I know I am, but don't believe I am. I lost my connection to
womanhood and femininity. They are not the sum of parts but the products
of the factors."
"Karen, womanhood is not a math equation. It is who you are. Yes,
breasts might be a sign you are a woman, but they do not add to you
being a woman. That goes the same with everything else physical which
you think makes you a woman. I am all woman even without having breasts
or a womb. I am a woman for it is my essence. You taught me that. You
made me see that I am a woman even if God got my body wrong.
Now let that great man of yours help you find your connection to your
womanhood. But before that, come with me. It is time for me to teach you
a couple of makeup tricks for once."
*************
Karen listened to her Baby Sis. If anyone else had said those words, the
sad lady would have stayed in her comfy nest in the middle of the
neverending night. It would have been easy to not to pay heed to those
words, for they were not that inspiring. The inspiration came from the
confidence and conviction in the way words were said. She felt hope, for
the first time since losing the connection to her womanhood, Karen
followed the path Kira's light was illuminating, and took a shower
before the makeup lesson.
As Kira was getting ready, Kira did something she never thought she
would again, raid her sister's closet. It felt like old times, for her
sister did not know, and would be pissed if she caught her. It was also
like old times because the only reason Karen would be pissed is that
Kira never put anything back where she found it. The reason behind
taking a peek to see what was good to wear was the only difference. This
was the first time that Kira did so to pick something out for her Big
Sis.
Then Kira found the perfect dress to help feed the fire of hope which
was helping her Big Sis out of the darkness. It was a green, off the
shoulder dress, just perfect for Karen's body. The green matched Karen's
eyes and was a perfect compliment to her long curly red hair. Kira loved
the crepe bell sleeves, rear slit, and most importantly, the sweetheart
neckline.
That neckline which was made to show cleavage was perfect for Kira to
share her secret. It plunged deep enough between the breasts to
highlight where the breasts meet, without going too far. This was
needed, for the makeup lesson was not anything dealing with the face,
like how to make smoky eyes, but how to create cleavage contour.
Kira laid the dress on Karen's bed and then went to her own suitcase and
pulled out a self-adhesive bra and her makeup kit. She looked at Big
Sis's dresser and thought of getting a strapless bra out, but knew
better. The last thing she wanted to do was get Karen's panties in a
bunch from actually getting Karen's panties in a bunch, instead of the
neat way they were put away.
While Kira was getting ready to give the tutorial, Karen was taking a
nice hot shower. This was the first time she had taken a shower which
was more than functional. Instead of just getting the dirt of the day
off of her, Karen let the warm water soothe her also. After losing her
communion with womanhood, Karen felt that she was not worthy of
indulging in pleasures she associated with it.
Stepping out of the shower, Karen felt as rejuvenated as a soldier
coming home from a long deployment in a war zone and seeing their family
waiting for them. In some way she was like a veteran; her war was
against cancer and she was still mourning the loss of two of her closest
friends in combat. Right now was the first time the survivor attempted
to look past the pain of leaving the fallen behind and be around the
living. She gathered the strength to be strong for it was a way to pay a
debt of someone doing the same for her. Baby Sis looked past the pain of
being betrayed by her own body for Karen.0
Karen saw her favorite dress on the bed and in a playful manner said,
"Kira, you better of not have left my closet how you used to when you
used to sneak into it. I knew a long time before I caught you about your
raids from how much of a mess was left."
"I was careful."
Karen was getting somber because, even with loving that dress, she knew
she could never wear it again. It was made to accentuate what she did
not have, bosoms. Seeing it also helped Karen think about moving
forward. She needed to do a good cleaning of her wardrobe and donate the
clothes she could not wear anymore to charity. Someone who was embraced
with femininity should get use from what was collecting dust. "Good, I
will not feel guilty by rewarding you by giving you that dress."
"I don't want it."
"Then why is it out?"
"You are going to wear it. You need to for my makeup lesson."
joy and excitement in"I can't wear that, it will draw attention to me
not having cleavage!"
"Yes you can, and I am going to show you how to give yourself nice
cleavage."
Kira could tell her big sister was as hesitant as an American driver at
a British roundabout about showing her flat chest to Kira. Kira then
took off her blouse and bra, to show Karen that they were bosom buddy in
being bosomless. Karen knew how hard baring her nothingless was for Kira
to do. This sign of unity gave Karen the strength to show her sister she
was not alone. Karen took off her robe and stood there proud. She felt
like her connection to womanhood and femininity was coming back and she
needed to meet it. Karen said "I am ready for you to show me."
Baby Sis then started to give instructions on what to do. Big Sis went
along, but was as into the lesson as a nudist was into clothes. First,
Kira told Karen to put the sticky bra on then pull her cleavage
together. Then Karen was instructed to quickly put on the strapless bra,
then her breast forms in it. After that, she was told to apply
foundation a shade darker than her skin by wiggling her wrist and using
the bra as a fulcrum. This made an arch above each cup.
Then when the base of the contour was done, Karen was told to use a
slightly darker tone in the middle, where the cleavage would be more
intense. The next step was adding a lighter highlighting shade around
the contour to make it pop even more. Then the last part was to blend it
all together to Karen's taste as to how pronounced she wanted the
cleavage.
Karen then put on the dress and looked in the mirror. The reflection was
of something she never thought she would see again, her having a great
rack! She thought great rack for she knew that phrase showed primal lust
and that was the response she hoped to get from Seth. It might not be
elegant and show decorum, but a woman does not always want her man to be
reserved in his responses from looking at her.
The two Brock girls started to talk. Karen was in the moment enjoying
herself. She felt like she was being embraced by what she thought had
forsworn her, femininity and womanhood. Then the bedroom door opened, it
was Seth. Those two didn't notice and kept on laughing and smiling and
then they heard Seth say, "Wow!"
Hearing the joy and excitement in her man's voice made Karen's smile
grow . She assumed her man was happy to see the illusion on her chest
and rhetorically asked, "Do you like them?"
Right then Seth's sallowness meant so much to her. She could deal with
him not being as special as she thought he was if he was this happy by
her cleavage being back by sleight of hand. Needing this mirage did
shatter the illusion of her relationship being one which belonged in a
fairy tale. Karen knew she was lucky finding out her was human because
most found out there was a frog. That did not matter for Karen knew this
was real life and having love and a connection to someone was fairytale
enough compared to the real world. She just wanted ever after with Seth.
At first Seth was a little confused, he did not know the them which his
wife was referring to. Then he looked at her outfit and saw the
cleavage. "Oh I do love them, but the wow was not about them. It is
about your smile being back. I love that smile and missed it so much.
That wonderful smile was the first thing I ever noticed about you and
made me need to get to know you better."
Jeannie
- 21.03.2022
- 13
- 0
