Chimp Donkey
- 4 years ago
- 27
- 0
If like me, you are an avid reader of popular self-help literature, you may know there are three people living inside your mind.
The first is you. The sensible adult. The responsible you who is navigating their way through life in the best way they can. Applying societal rules and norms, endeavouring to fulfil the potential that life has to offer.
The second is your computer. As you would expect, this is a boring, nerd-like component of your psyche that takes the information you feed into your brain and files it away somewhere, ready to be reappropriated at exactly the right time (or inconsistently if you’re like me and always come last in pub quizzes).
The third ‘person’ to inhabit your mind is all about instinct, surveying the landscape, seeking out evidence for possible dangers and filling in the gaps where there is none. Illogical, unreasonable, emotional and paranoid, they can jump to conclusions and catastrophise at the slightest opportunity, reacting on impulse, often irrationally, always emotionally. This generally results in confusion, exhaustion and regret once the dust settles and reality is revealed. Sound familiar at all? This is your chimp.
Now please don’t get cross with me. I didn’t say this is about your chimp, this is just how all chimps are apparently, and I won’t get the slightest bit affronted if you disagree with me.
Anyway, this describes my chimp perfectly, and in the last few months it has taken over, running amok and creating quite a bit of chaos in my life. I’ve found myself jealously guarding all that is important to me, convinced that at any moment it will be ‘stolen.’ Everything going on around me seeming to be a personal threat, all perspective lost, as I’ve spent hours seeking out the most tenuous pieces of evidence to confirm my fears. Nights have been spent alternating between fretting over the future or plotting revenge over imagined slights that never even happened, and deep shame and self-hatred for acting so impulsively.
To be honest, I was quite exhausted. Having all this churning, angry, destructive jealousy dwelling inside me made me feel very uncomfortable, so I felt it might be easier to pull my chimp out of my body and sit it down to have words.
At first, I had assumed that my chimp would be male due to its aggressive, competitive and caustic behaviour, but when I finally sat it down on my lap, I saw a defiant petulant girl, eyes blazing, teeth barred ready for a fight. This little madam was definitely of the female variety. I looked into her eyes and saw my ego glaring back at me.
Now I’ve been warned that chimps are five times stronger than we are, so armouring up and engaging in a battle will likely have poor consequences. As I eyed my feisty, infuriated chimp I considered the best approach to take with her and decided to try the gentle touch.
”You’ve not been very helpful recently, have you? What’s up?” I asked tentatively.
She eyed me suspiciously, and then recalled every paranoid slight, comment, assumption and worst fear that had been churning through my brain over the last few months.
“Yes, yes, I know all about the evil, hateful people that have been put on this planet just to make us miserable, all the terrible luck we’ve had, all the failures we will likely incur, and the countless worries and concerns we need to prepare ourselves for, particularly in these crazy times. But you’ve not been making it easier for us, creating irrational scenarios, causing arguments, being mean to people who didn’t deserve it, feeling unbearably sorry for ourselves. What’s up?” I repeated.
She shifted nervously in my lap, and if I didn’t know any better, I would say I saw the slightest glint of guilt creep into her eyes. Then she bucked up, trying to justify her poor behaviour.
“Ah, I see. You’ve been trying to protect us from danger. Well, that’s kind.” I paused, thinking slowly. “Thank you.”
I saw her visibly relax a little, as she snuggled closer to my body.
“Do you need a hug?” I asked my chimp.
She looked up at me with these adorable wide eyes and nodded slowly, so I wrapped my arms around her chunky fur-covered body and pulled her in close. I ran my fingers through her soft brown hair, stroking away the tension and anger in her funny furry little form.
“Is that better?” I asked her.
She looked up at me all doleful and quite frankly a little irresistibly and nodded again. I hugged her tighter.
That evening, we sat outside for hours, snuggled together for warmth, as I forgave her for all her sins. I explained that while other people might think she was a crazy lunatic, I could completely see where she was coming from and that she made total sense to me.
As she snuggled closer, her arms gripped vice-like around my neck, clearly seeking the security she so craved. We discussed how, perhaps in the future, it might be better to come to me first, shrieking and screaming if necessary, to talk through whatever was bothering her. I explained that this was much more preferable to marching straight into an argument, or spending days fretting and worrying about what would most likely come to nothing. We considered all the fun we might have together if we weren’t spending so much time causing trouble for ourselves, and we agreed that we should definitely spend more time dancing - a lot more time dancing. That certainly perked her up.
Over the days and weeks that followed, things settled down a lot. Whenever a negative thought popped into my mind, I’d pull out my chimp, have a little chat with her and allay all her fears. I found myself driving around with her in my lap, both of us thinking up the best insults for all the crazy drivers on the road. I’d listen carefully and then laugh gently at her when she’d get all tense and aggressive if she thought we could be under attack.
There was one thing that still bothered me though. Apparently, your chimp, although immature and often unhelpful, has the very important task of being in charge of all your drives. This includes survival which incorporates eating, security and sex. Now sex is a big one. After all, the species is at stake. And let’s not forget all the pleasurable, sexy and erotic side effects that are thrown in for free.
Evidently, it is the chimp, if left unsupervised, that can get carried away with the sex drive, causing all manner of chaos, promiscuity, depravity, infidelity and deception in search of sexual satiation. Now, this is where my chimp appeared to be a little faulty. All the times she had been rampaging wildly through my brain, taking a firm grip on my life, she had completely neglected my sex drive. She seemed to guard it like a fortress. Not allowing anyone in who wasn’t worthy, immediately suspicious of any interlopers who dared attempt to strip me of my carefully constructed and closely protected armour.
One Saturday morning, I was eyeing my chimp, happily lap-sitting and humming to herself quietly.
“Why aren’t you more sex-obsessed?” I asked her.
She looked up at me, narrowing her eyes. Immediately on the defence.
“You’re meant to lead me astray. Get me into more trouble. Drag me into dangerous and sexy adventures in search of more and more satisfaction. Why don’t you do that? Everyone else’s chimps seem to do that and they have much more fun.”
Now I’ll admit, that last sentence probably came from the chimp as that is the kind of thing she would say. Constantly comparing us to others is one of her more highly developed skills.
Her eyes looked at me questioningly, she was clearly thinking about this considerable oversight on her part.
She started fidgeting in her seat, looking awkward and uncomfortable. I stared her down, waiting for an answer.
“Worrying about getting hurt is a bullshit, whiney answer. It’s just fucking. Fucking is meant to be fun. It doesn’t have to mean anything.” Now it was me that was getting agitated.
I saw her eyes blaze with fury. She was getting exercised. I continued on anyway, looking for a fight. I didn’t want to let this go. I wanted to put her on the spot.
“And anyway, you’re meant to be ruled by your impulses. You shouldn’t be caring about the consequences when it comes to sex. You don’t seem to care about it when it comes to your other bad behaviours. I’m meant to be the sensible boring one.”
“Remember the other week? When that handsome Adam from accounts was getting us drunk after work? We went outside for a quick fumble, his hands were all over us, pushing us up against the wall. I was going great guns rubbing his hard, throbbing cock through his trousers. And I was really enjoying it when he pulled my top up, pushed my bra down and started sucking on my tits. I was all ready to give him a blow job, but you panicked. Made up some silly excuse and we had to run away. What do you say to that?”
She considered this, and assumed a conciliatory expression.
“Yes, I know we like strong, sexy, domineering women. Is that because their voices are louder than yours? They silence you with their authority? They make you go weak as a kitten, have us quivering with lust, desperate to sink to our knees and beg to be used?”
Her eyes widened and she smiled wickedly at the thought.
“Now don’t you get carried away. Come back here, we haven’t finished discussing this,” I interrupted her as her little mind was sinking into bliss.
“That’s no good. We have no control over them. They just make you go all needy, clingy and insecure. We hate that. We need to take back some control.”
She looked up at me aghast.
“Oh no, not control back from them. That wouldn’t be any fun at all. And anyway, that would just earn us a stingy, spanked, reddened bottom.”
Both of us gazed off into space for a moment, smiling at the thought.
I brought us both back to reality.
“You’re scared, that’s what it is. You’re scared that if we go off looking for trouble, we might actually find some. And where would that leave us? All vulnerable and exposed.”
We both contemplated this unappealing outcome, sinking back into our seats.
“What we need is practice. We need to remember how much fun fucking is, and disconnect it from all the other shit you’ve got going on in our head.”
She looked at me speculatively.
“Well, how would I know where to start? You’re the one in control of the sex drive,” I asked, exasperated.
Suddenly she jumped up in my lap, fluttered her pretty eyelashes and then turned her back to me, wiggling her shapely bottom in my face.
“No, no,” I shouted at her. “That is completely inappropriate,” I shuddered. “I don’t want to have sex with you! You’re my chimp.”
She slowly turned, hanging her head and visibly pouting.
“I’m sorry, but that’s clearly not natural. We couldn’t possibly do that.”
We both sat in silence for a moment, confused about who had said the last sentence.
“Are you completely sure?” One of us said, but at this point, it wasn’t clear who.
Sitting back down, she assumed her now-familiar insecure position, snuggling close to my body, wrapping her fingers in my hair, twirling the strands around her black padded digits.
She looked up at me from under her lashes as she began to stroke her fur covered cheek against mine. Then, still staring into my eyes, she placed the softest kiss upon my cheek. Before I knew it, I felt a warm, wet sensation on my ear lobe, as she gently started nibbling the delicate sensitive flesh.
I made a half-hearted attempt to push her away, giggling slightly awkwardly. But she was stronger than me and held my arms tightly by my side as she moved her thick but surprisingly soft lips down my neck, caressing and nibbling the taut flesh along my collar bone.
I was squirming slightly, deeply uncomfortable at such close and intimate proximity. She looked sternly into my eyes with a clear unspoken instruction not to move my arms as she released her grip. I watched in morbid fascination as she slowly unfastened my shirt, her large fingers dextrously uncoupling each button, and then liberating the shirt from my shoulders.
Her hands began to tentatively drift over my body, slowly stroking my quivering skin. She caressed my sides and reached round my back as she unclasped my bra, discarding it carelessly. She slid her strong hands back along my arms, reminding me to keep them at my side, as began to run her fingers over my breasts, letting them fall heavy in her large, leathery palms.
I bit my bottom lips as I felt my nipples begin to tingle and harden as she rubbed a rough thumb over their tips, and I had to squeeze my legs together, squirming as I felt twinges deep in my core. She smirked at me as she tugged on my nipples, teasing, pinching and pulling on them. Trying and failing to suppress a moan she smiled at me, eyes glinting with mischief as she bent her head to suckle on a nipple.
My body responded helplessly, arching my back, my thighs parting as if stretched wide by magnets, her large slobbering tongue lashing my nipples. Her padded fingers sashayed down my stomach and into my panties, gliding along my already slickened labia. Resistance fully abandoned I spread my thighs wider as she slid a fur-covered finger deep inside me, her thumb circling my throbbing clitoris.
Throwing my head back, panting uncontrollably, I rocked my hips against her solid, chubby fingers, as they delved deeper and deeper into my core, caressing my warm wet walls as they gripped her digits. She started to fuck me slowly, squelching noises audible from my wet dripping cunt, gathering speed as her pistoning kept time with my thrusting hips. I felt the heat build throughout my body as it started to shudder as my orgasm overwhelmed me.
Coming back down to earth, my breath slowly returning to normal, I watched as she pulled her fingers out of me, bringing them up to her cute mischievous mouth, before popping them inside to lick off my juices. She smiled up at me, before snuggling back into my chest to resume her cuddle.
We both sat in silence, complicit in our contemplation.
We lit a cigarette.
“So, pub on Friday then?”
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Extreme Porn WebsitesWhen it first started I was 14 years old and was really into watching porn and jerking off, when my mother Sue Parker comes into my room on a Saturday morning with dad outside working in the yard. She just stops right there at the doorway, seeing me naked at my desk with my laptop open playing a porn where a mom is sucking her sons dick in his room for the first time. So as mom is staring at my 10” semi hard cock as I’m still watching the porn, we hear the son yell, “with practice mother you...
Incest porn has been a staple of pornography since the very first incel caveman realized that he couldn’t find fresh pussy out and about. He resorted to sniffing a whiff of his mother’s loincloth when she wasn’t looking, and beating his old cave meat into a leather sock.Now personally I’m not into the whole mommy-son dynamic – I’m a classy guy. But it’s no secret people like to get freaky when the lights go out, and if you’ve got a stiffy in your hand and you’re on Motherless, you gotta go...
Incest Porn SitesHi friends, indru tamil kama kathaiyil en sontha thangaiyai epadi oothen endra kudumba tamil kama kathaiyai ungal idam pagirugiren. Vaarungal tamil kama kathaikul selalam, en peyar prathap vayathu 28 aagugirathu. Enaku oru thangi irukiraal aval peyar mala vayathu 26 aagugirathu, avaluku innum thirumanam seiya vilai Avaluku thirumanam seithu vaikum alavirku engal idam ipozhuthu panam ilai, loan apply seithu atharkaaga kathukondu irukirom. Naan oru kama veriyan eppozhuthu pen kidaikum avargalai...
My name is Cathy and I am twenty-three. I work as a dance instructor and hence I keep quite fit. To help me along with my profession, I attend a gym around the corner from my home. It happens to be in the same building that I teach dance so it's not far for me to travel at all.Now, I shall describe myself in the only word I could think of: slut. I am a huge slut. I just love sex, I can’t help it. I am small, only 5’2, but I have a huge sexual appetite and can’t help but love cock. My friends...
Monster SexD-Lin! The bell gives a playful cheery ring as the door closes behind, welcoming you into the building. Rows and rows of crowded shelves of books spread as far as the eye can see, with rather large signs organizing the genre of each category. You gasp in awe at how much larger this place is on the inside then it seemed on the outside, an aura of tingling excitement surrounds you almost as if tiny little faires tickled your senses. Clean air, nice wooden work with that humble creek with each...
FantasyPaul and the Yellow Eyed Monster By Paul G. Jutras It was a day with nowhere to go and nothing to do. Missy had some paper, but nobody felt like cutting it. Kenny found some crayons, but nobody wanted to draw. If it were just Missy and Paul, Paul would have suggested playing Barbie Dolls or having a Tea Party, but with the guys there, there was nothing much around to play with, except a ball of clay. Paul rolled the clay in his hands. As he rolled it, the clay got softer and...
Reddit Monster Girl, aka r/MonsterGirl! How confused are you by the name of this subreddit? Monster Girl, the fuck does that mean? Now, for those who do not frequently browse through hentai and other animated pornography might not be aware that monsters are like a fetish in that world… and thus, we have a subreddit that is dedicated to monster chicks. As soon as you check out r/MonsterGirl/, you will know exactly what the fuck I mean.Reddit.com is a free website with thousands of other...
Reddit NSFW ListFor as long as the history books dated, the monsters of this world have been trying to kidnap and enslave women in order to use them for birthing the next generation of monsters, believing that having human genes will make stronger monsters. The Knights of old have successfully fought back the monster raids, but every so often, one monster would get lucky and snatch a woman to become their slave, and these rare couplings validated the monsters' beliefs as the children from the couplings were...
FantasyMy name is Rebecca. Everyone calls me Becca. I entered the police department right out of college. I progressed rapidly, through different divisions and assignments. I always had my eyes set on Robbery-Homicide and after six years of hard word and dedication, I finally made it. At age thirty, I was youngest female in the division for such a coveted assignment, but I was superb at my job. I made it because of my skill not my gender. It was Saturday. Dispatch called our number just after we had...
TabooThanks to my usual cast and crew of Editors and Advance Readers, most of whom prefer to pretend that they don’t know me and wisely wish to take no responsibility for any part of my addled writings... Il n’est rien de réel que le rêve et l’amour - Nothing is real but dreams and love (from Le Coeur innombrable, IV, Chanson du temps opportun by Anna de Noailles) She was my one true mistress and ever faithful lover, my Green Lady and guardian of my dreams and now that I was back home...
A dark clap happened all over the world. A deep fog rolled in and strange noises could be heard. News channels were going crazy with this event and reports of monsters with large mouths were roaming around. Everyone was told to stay indoors and not to move until this all passed. I was home alone in my bedroom listening to music and generally not going outside. I got a text from one of my friends saying, "Jane! You're not gonna believe this but those monsters are eating people!" I shook my head...
Monster SexHi friends, indru kathaiyil en nanbanai kathal seithu emathiriya pennai ootha kathaiyai ungal idam pagirugiren. En tamil kathaiyai inaiya thalathil pathivu seithatharku nandri, en peyar pradeep vayathu 21 aagugirathu. En nanbanai oru pen kathal seithu matter mudinthathum kayati vitu vitaal, athanaal naan avalai usar seithu hardcore seiyanum endru mudithu seithen. En nanban enaku nanban endru kanbithukolamal aval idam muthal muthalil pesi pazhaga aarambithen. Aval pathini pola en idam nadika...
Hi friends, indru tamil kama kathaiyil en kanavanuku theriyamal ilamaiyaana kaal kathalanai eppadi love seithen endra kathaiyai ungal idam pagirugiren. Vaarungal tamil kama kathaikul selalam, enathu peyar jaya vayathu 36 agugirathu. Enaku thirumanam aagi oru paiyan irukiraan pinbu en kanavanuku vayathu 42 agugirathu. Naan santhoshamaaga thaan vaazhnthu vanthukondu irunthen, naan oru teacheraaga velai paarthu varugiren. Naan velai seiyum classku arugil oru veedu irukirathu, antha veetil oru...
The Paisley School for Extraordinary Girls in London is the finest college for the world's most talented ladies. Some of the young women studying there are great muscians, some are geniuses or athletes. Other girls have peculiar talents and find their way to the Incredible Arts Department. Here, Headmistress Victoria Swift teaches her young pupils the most important skill a woman can learn: how to defeat monsters. Three promising young women are bound for this year's trip to Monster Island for...
FantasyAmy Nielsen wasn’t like regular girls. She was shy and kept to herself. She liked to draw scary comics and dressed differently. The only color you’d see in her closet was black. Her mother and father thought she spent too much time by herself. She was a good student and maintained high marks. Her parents let her experiment with her look and didn’t get too involved with what she’d come up with to wear. Her hair was often different colors and she liked black eyeliner. She was interested in...
Monster SexMy name is Anthony and I am twenty-two years old. I have extra-long dark hair and darker eyes. I tie my hair into a ponytail and have a close trimmed beard. I look handsome and enjoy keeping myself in shape. I am a lucky guy as I have a very sexy girlfriend who is two years older than me. Zoe and I met at a mutual friend’s party and hit it off right away. She has short blonde hair and blue eyes. Her small beautiful mouth sits beneath a cute button nose. All in all, Zoe is a goddess and I love...
CrossdressingHi friends, indru sex kathaiyil auntyai usar seithu eppadi matter adithen enbathai ungalidam pagirugiren. En peyar Seenu. Vayathu 21 aagugirathu. Naan ithu naal varai entha penaiyum sex seithathu kidaiyaathu. Naan engineering padithu varugiren, enathu nanbargal oru naal theaterku ennai azhaithaargal. Naangal neraga bar seithu saraku adithom, appozhuthu bagubali padam oodi kondu irunthathu. Naangal oru gramathil irukum theaterku sendru irunthom. Angu pothuvaga pengal athigam vara matargal,...
Yeah, we went to Loch Ness for our honeymoon. Kit misses the dragons now that Game of Thrones is over so we went hunting for Nessie! They’d joked about what they’d do if the fabled monster showed up, but when the massive shadow popped out of the water right next to their boat there hadn’t been a single thing Kit could do to protect her. She saw a brief glimpse of his stunned face as the beast dragged her out of the boat with her shirt caught in its mouth, and then she had to close her eyes as...
When the car with Jake in it became a dot on the horizon, Thea turned to go back in the house. Suddenly Floyd appeared. “Mrs. Thea, how you be?” Smiling, she knew immediately what he wanted. He had that look and a glance at his crotch confirmed it. The imprint of his cock was prominent as it pushed against the material. “Looks like everyone is gone.” Floyd said. His eyes looking out over the farm. “Yes, I am by myself for at least the next few days.” She replied in an...
“Well, hell,” Thea said as she wiped the beads of perspiration from her face. “I guess ‘spring’ is here, huh?” “Yeah. It’s supposed to be cooler at higher elevation,” I replied. We took a few minutes in the shade by the rocks before rejoining our boyfriends. The four of us had driven up into the pass to hike. According to the weather report, the last coolness of a fading winter was supposed to continue through mid-week, but they were wrong. Actually, from our view from Eagle Point, where we’d...
Motherless.com! What an original name for a porn site, don't you think? The title doesn't fuck around: your mother would never allow you to watch the kind of filth they’ve got on tap. They pride themselves on being a moral-free zone for sick fucks, where you can find damn near anything. I’m talking about desperate chicks fucking anything that resembles a dick and crazy bitches literally eating shit. When you’re done fapping to the weird vids, you can even find "normal" porno to pass the time....
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