An Interview With Mona Dee free porn video

Q: It's become a standard for you to always do interviews naked and masturbating. How come, pun intended?

A: (Laughs). I don't know. I just...I just like to play with myself when others watch. And I don't blame you for not joining me, but sometimes they do. Last spring I did this radio show, no adult radio, very mainstream, late in the night and I masturbated on air and convinced one of the male hosts to join in. It was radio, there was no video or photos, but still they got a fucking ton of hate mail. The guy had to make a public apology to keep his job. And his two colleagues, they were absolutely grossed out when this man, this middle-aged balding man, stripped out of his clothes, jerked off on the air, was moaning on live radio and shot a huge fucking load on the floor. I thought it was hot. I would've sucked him off if they only let me do that.

Q: Is this idea of you being hyper-sexual, in a near-constant state of arousal accurate or exaggerated?

A: I mean, I'm not having sex or masturbating all the time. But yeah, I'm a horny slut. I have sex at home, I have sex at work. I am hyper-sexual. I used to fight it when I was much younger. I even went to some fucking Sex Addicts Anonymous meetings, but even then I just ended up fucking half the members. Doing porn was a way of accepting who I was. I'm so lucky. I make a living by doing what I would be doing anyway.

Q: What was that process like, that road to being yourself?

A: It was scary at first. I remember this one time, I was nineteen back then and an exchange student in Italy. There were these nude beaches and I went there and I took it all off, and it was great and all that. But there were others naked, it's not like people were staring. So it was a bit of a disappointment, but I'll tell you what I did. I went to this other beach and it wasn't clothing-optional. I pretended that I thought it was. I laid there naked and was thrilled when some guys were checking me out. This older woman spoiled the fun by telling me it wasn't clothing-optional. So, I pretended to be horribly embarrassed and got dressed and left. When I got back to my room, I spent like three hours masturbating, just thinking of those looks I got. That time in Italy was a transforming experience. I was more relaxed after I got back home. I quickly developed this reputation, because I was always fucking wasted at parties, always stripping down. Like, if there was a fucking Jacuzzi or a sauna, I went naked even if others didn't. I was always the one going skinny dipping. And I was sleeping around a lot, with guys at first and then I started experimenting with girls. I developed this routine, they'd get me drunk and encourage me to do a little striptease. They were clapping and chanting and it ended with me completely naked. So yeah, people started to see me as a slut.

Q: Was porn something you always wanted to do?

A: Ever since I became an exhibitionist. There were a couple of student parties where dozens of people saw me naked and it was such a fucking thrill! Someone at school asked me if I had considered modeling and of course I was interested. The first shoots were just bikini, you know, lingerie stuff, but then the guy told me he knew this other guy who might have jobs for me if I was willing to go topless. Of course! So my tits were now a topic at school. Not much later, I got a job as a stripper and never went back to school. The shoots quickly progressed to full-frontal nudity. Then there was this brief period where I was hooking, you know, before I got into porn. Like, on the streets, sucking dick in some back alley. I still do that sometimes, by the way. Gets me real nostalgic. I recently did this undercover low-budget thing where I was selling pussy in Barcelona, working glory holes and so on.

Q: You have a reputation of being a heavy drinker and substance user. You're sipping whiskey as we speak. How do sex and substances fit together?

A: I am definitely a heavy drinker, have been for many, many years. Am I an alcoholic? I'm not sure what that word means. But I am functional. I'm not drunk all the time. It's a part of being a slut. Being a drunk makes this even hotter, not just being drunk, but being a drunk. When I was young, it was an excuse to be wild, you know, sexually. Nowadays I don't need excuses, but it can provide some more juice to fucking. But I have lots of sober sex as well. I don't need to be drunk to enjoy sex on camera, or on stage. The other drugs, they're just occasional. I never break the law. When I travel, if the laws are more relaxed there, I'll have some. Of course, weed is now legal, but I'm not that big on weed. I have a joint on rare occasions. I work often in Portugal, because they've decriminalized everything. So I stay a few weeks and do all sorts of stuff. I pop some pills, snort a ton of coke, even inject heroin sometimes. But I'm careful, with the needles and so on. And I had my agents find reliable dealers. I need to know what I'm using, how strong it is. And I don't mix things that shouldn't be mixed. I'm functional. Not gonna overdose. (Laughs) I guess a lot of people were surprised I made it past twenty-seven, you know, the rock star age.

Q: What are some of wildest substance-fueled sex experiences you've had?

A: If I remember them, they weren't that wild, were they? (Laughs) No, seriously, stimulants are always better than sedatives. That's a good general rule, in my experience. Alcohol is a good stimulant. Weed, heroin, Xannies, codeine, they just slow me down, but they're alright afterwards. Like if you just had an orgy and then smoke a joint or take a couple of pills. You know what's a good stimulant? Caffeine, sometimes I don't have anything intoxicating. I just have a shitload of caffeine. Coffee's too slow for that, you need energy drinks and you need to drink them fast to get your heart racing. But yeah, I'd say coke and meth are the best sex drugs, really strong stimulants. Crystal meth and crack, and also because they're like the lowest of drugs. Like, can you get any lower than being a fucking whore on crack? Acid and shrooms are too weird, I'm not really into the psychedelics, though I've experimented. The wildest, dumbest drug experiments were probably sniffing things, you know, like glue, paint, fucking gasoline. I did that only a couple of times, it was...it wasn't great. I just wanted to try it. Can't say I remember a whole lot of those nights. As I said, the other drugs are just for countries where it's legal. When I'm in the States, I just drink. I used to drink lots of beer, but then I was gaining weight and you can't be a porn star with a beer belly. So I mostly have hard liquor now. The tolerance goes up over the years, so what I do nowadays is drink on an empty stomach. Just like now, I woke up late today, so haven't even had any breakfast yet and already started on the whiskey. I'll tell you what my wildest drunk sex dream is like. For years, I've wanted to do this video where I drink until I pass out and then a bunch of guys fuck me. Nothing fake, I would really be unconscious while they film it. My lawyer's advised against it and I always take his advice. There's a line you can't cross and then there's a gray area that you should stay away from. But if I had to choose just one substance for the rest of my life, it would be alcohol. I've grown so accustomed to the taste, certain drinks taste so good while giving a buzz. Like this whiskey. Meth and coke are great, but ultimately whiskey is even better. I guess it's partly nostalgia. I started drinking way before I started using anything else. So if I had to overdose, I'd drink myself to death with whiskey.

Q: Your lifestyle doesn't seem to reflect on your appearance. Do you have any particular health or fitness routines?

A: I do, I do work out regularly and try to eat a certain way. This takes it's toll, you know. Not just the drinking and drugging, but these damn cigarettes. (She takes a break from masturbation to light up a cigarette.) And I do have my sober periods, as well. Like not that long ago, I was sober for two weeks. I had been working in Portugal and it was like a fucking haze. I was snorting coke off the dicks, popping pills, everything, crystal meth, smoking a freaking crack pipe. Not all of that at once of course! (Laughs) It was a crazy three weeks and I had to lay off all the stuff afterwards. Felt like I needed a little detox. But yeah, back to the question. (Laughs) I do make an effort into looking good. And of course, it's not like everything's natural anyway. I've had a lot of work done.

Q: Do you consider body modification to be another addiction, like drinking or smoking?

A: I do, it sure is, for me it is, there's just a thrill about being so damn vain. I don't wanna overdo it. Like, if you know Jessie Waley, she got obsessed with tattoos and now she's almost completely covered in them, barely any skin left. I never took it that far. I have...53 tats, I think is the current count. I've had some scarring done, piercings, plastic surgery, work on my boobs (She jiggles them and kisses the nipples for illustration.), work on my ass, all sorts of things. Hair removal as well, not from the pussy. Usually I trim it or shave it all off, but sometimes you want the wild bush. But legs and arms, I don't want any hair there, so they did some things there and I never have to shave. And there's a lot ideas I would like to get done, but they're probably too extreme.

Q: Even more extreme than becoming a man for a brief period?

A: I wouldn't say that I was a man. I didn't go the whole route, I didn't get all the hormonal things and I never got rid of my boobs. Didn't want a beard or nothing. I just wanted to see what it was like to have a dick. Some said it would destroy my career, but I bounced back, didn't I?

Q: Was it purely a negative reaction or did some people like it?

A: Of course some did, there's always some out there. But it's a niche thing, chicks with dicks. I took time off for the operation and then released the reveal video of me jerking off and the internet exploded in anger. So many people hated it, even though I assured them it wouldn't be permanent. And the trans people attacked me for belittling them.

Q: Was there any desire to not transition back?

A: Absolutely not. I love being a chick. I love having a pussy. (She spreads her legs as far as possible for illustration, then resumes masturbation.) But it was an interesting six months. And the haters were wrong, my career recovered. It was like that thing with New Coke. When I got my pussy back, I held a special event, Back to the Pussy, a celebration and there was like a million people watching. Many of the biggest names in the biz came, pun intended. (Laughs)

Q: Talk about these body modification ideas. What are they like?

A: Well, I'm interested in all kinds of extremes, like being super skinny or really, morbidly obese. I can't do all of those things, so what I do is find others who have, how do I put this, special bodies. I've done tons of fetish videos with fat people, or really anorexic people, tall people, midgets, really muscular, like body-builders. And disabled people. I love the idea of being disabled. At one point, I really fantasized about having my legs amputated. I've had sex with wheelchair people, amputees, paralyzed people. Blind people, deaf people. Most extreme experience was having sex with this girl who didn't have any limbs. I had steamy lesbian sex with her and a couple of guys joined us. I do have some ideas of body modification that aren't even possible. They're just pipe dreams. I make drawings and send them to surgeons who say it can't be done. Demonic things, bat wings, tails, horns, so on.

Q: Holy shit! How do you think people would react to that?

A: Most wouldn't get that. Career-wise it would be a bad move. I've been thinking about getting my tongue split. Like, some girls I know make that look real good. I don't know. It might be off-putting to some, but you can't please everyone. It's hardly mainstream.

Q: Isn't it the case, though, that instead of following the fashions, you instead set them? It's often been said that very few people, if any, in the porn industry have done more to to normalize the extreme than you have.

A: I guess that's true. But I don't take the credit. It's all been there, for a long time, in some form or another. I studied the pioneers and I've had the honor of working with some of them. I'm more of a popularizer myself. You can't be good at everything. Like Ellie Fontaine, she's like the queen of piss. Nobody can piss more than that bitch, it's like a gallon of piss. She's pissed on me a few times and I swear it was like a fucking gallon. She's a specialist. I'm a generalist. I do all sorts of things, but I can't get to that level in any of them.

Q: Was your pregnancy also about body modification or were there other motives for that?

A: (Stops masturbating) That certainly was part of it. I wanted to be super-feminine and what could be more feminine than that? And they say great things about pregnant sex and there's really no other way to experience it than to go through it yourself. I certainly had a fun time being pregnant even though I was white-knuckling to stay sober. And those videos were very popular. It's a niche, but a fairly big one. Some people didn't like that, but they knew it would be over soon. I got pregnant at that point in my career, because I already had the sex change idea in my head so I figured I need to get pregnant first if I'm gonna do it. I honestly don't know who the baby daddy is. There's seventeen candidates. Everyone shot a load inside of me that night. Who knows?

Q: Is it true that after giving birth you seriously considered quitting porn?

A: At that point I had signed all the paperwork. I had told my lawyer to find a good family for that baby girl. I would've been a terrible mother, I'm sure. And they would've taken her away anyways, with my career and the drinking and the drugs. (Tears up.) But yeah, when I was pregnant, especially the last couple of months, I really realized how lucky that couple would be, that they actually get to raise that child. But it was too late for me. I've crossed too many lines a long time ago. That's...that's really a part of why I do these things, why I'm so extreme. It's to make sure there's no going back. Ordinary life is not an option. (Long pause) After I had given birth, I took some time off. That was really the only break from porn I've ever taken. It wasn't just physical, it was more mental. i rented this little cabin for a month and just sat on the porch, walked in the woods, listened to the birds. When I was there, I was all alone the whole time, celibate. (Laughs) Can you imagine me celibate for a month? I had no sex, didn't even masturbate, didn't watch porn. And I was sober too. Just like being pregnant, I never, when I was pregnant I didn't drink or use drugs or smoke. I didn't wanna hurt the baby. Some maternal instinct kicked in. Anyway, when I was in the cabin I thought about what other paths were available to me, but there didn't seem to be any. I knew I would go back to the porn. I didn't have the money to retire, I had made zero investments, I was fucking terrible with finances. And the sex was still good. After a month in the cabin I returned to civilization and went back into porn and prostitution, started drinking again. There was nothing else to do.

Q: I'm sorry for being so blunt, but do you have any contact with your daughter?

A: No, I don't even know her name or where she lives. My lawyer checks in on them, just letting me know she's fine. And I send a check to her adoptive parents every month, through my lawyer. There's a trust fund for her when she's grown up. I don't want her to know me. I wouldn't want to...I'd be ashamed if she knew.

Q: How would you react if you found out years from now that she chose the same career as you did?

A: I'd hate that. Of course, I'd be devastated just like my folks were when they found about me. I didn't get them at the time, but I understood when I was holding that baby in the maternity ward. I was so fucking tired, feeling like I was half-dead, but I wanted to hold her just once before they took her away.

Q: Do you have any contact with your family?

A: No, not for a few years now. Dad was furious when he found out back in the day, mom was more sad. We still saw each other for a couple of years, not often and every time we did, they tried to talked me out of it. They asked me to move back there, they offered to pay my bills. You know, they're quite well off. I'm not from a poor family. I didn't get into this because I was desperate for money. When I started getting into more extreme porn, my folks wanted less and less to do with me. After I started making incest porn, fake incest, I think that was the last straw.

Q: There was something about your cousins?

A: Oh, yes, that thing. I don't have any siblings and I desperately wanted to make genuine incest porn instead of the fake one. So I reached out to my cousins. None of them agreed to do it on the tape, but my cousin Jared did fuck me, a few times. And I mentioned this in some fucking interview and it was a scandal in the family. I have no idea how Jared is doing. They all probably pretend that I never existed. Then I did something incredibly stupid. I got drunk and wrote this letter to my folks and I asked them if they wanted to make incest porn with me, I asked if daddy wanted to fuck me. I wasn't being awfully serious, but at the time, I think I would've done it if they had said yes. But of course I knew they wouldn't respond. It was just my way of burning bridges. Like I said, I make sure there is no going back. That was quite a thing to realize back in that cabin, that there was no going back, no one to go back to. I had burned all the bridges by then. It's kind of funny and kind of sad. Like, I'm really popular, millions know me, but there's basically no one who sees me as anything other than a whore. That's what I realized in that cabin, that everybody I hung out with was only there for the sex or the money or both. I'm a fucking piece of meat, but I started embracing that.

Q: Earlier you mentioned not being good with finances. Being so hugely popular, it might come off as a surprise to many that you are you as not rich as they might think. Could you explain why this is?

A: (Resumes masturbation) Well, in the early days I had this obsession with trying every possible vice, of having every possible addiction. So I gambled away fucking fortunes, like over a million fucking bucks, two million, I don't even know how much. I spent like two hundred grand buying useless shit that I didn't need. I bought, like, these paintings, expensive fucking paintings, and then I destroyed them when I was drunk. Bought these Ming-vases and threw them off the balcony. Later on, as I got deeper and deeper into the extreme side of things, I decided not to make a lot of money. I never ask for that much money for myself anymore. The only thing hotter than being a whore is being a very cheap whore. You buy me a bottle of scotch and I'll jerk you off. Like, literally, I've done that, not that long ago. Nowadays most of the money goes to charity. I have this system, it's like balancing karma. I try to do good things to balance out all the abusive shit I inflict on others. And there's that money for my daughter. There's not much left after that. Like my recent stay in Portugal, I made almost no money off of that. They paid for accommodation and travel expenses and the shitload of drugs that I did, but that was it. They donated a lot to charity, but I made like a thousand bucks, for three weeks of hardcore fucking. That's partially to keep me from leaving the industry. I have to work constantly. The money in my bank account, I could drink all of that in a couple of weeks. So I need to keep blowing and jerking off guys and getting dicks rammed into both holes and all of that. Like my lawyer, he's one of the best in his business. I could never afford his usual fees, so he asks for a nominal fee and then we have sex. Every time we meet, I start by sucking him dry. He's such a busy man, I'm sure he appreciates not having to chase the pussy. Of course, our producers could pay him but I prefer it this way.

Q: You mentioned abusive shit. Could you briefly explain what this legal abuse business is about and how you came up with the concept?

A: It's not exactly my concept. The producer, Mike Chavez, came up with this idea. He had been sitting on this concept for a long time, not really sure whether to go ahead. But he had gotten to a point where he had a billion dollars in the bank and nothing to lose, so he called me and I was thrilled instantly. The basic idea is that, yes, you need to give consent. We're not raping anyone. But, what if you gave consent for very bad reasons? Like you were desperate for money, for whatever reason. So our team searches for these kinds of people. We don't take applications, some of them would be phonies, who really wanted to do porn. So the basic idea is that we find people who don't want to do porn, but reluctantly agree to it anyway. I'm a big believer in the rule of law. This is the closest you can get to raping someone without actually being a rapist.

Q: And is that a turn-on for you, that they are very reluctant to perform?

A: Absolutely! I've now had sex with like a two hundred people who only do it for the desperation. The sex is awkward because they're not really into it. And especially if it's a live show, in front of an audience. They're so ashamed to be there and we humiliate them, make them masturbate or piss on stage or something. We have these impotent guys and we laugh at them. Even though I'm normally more into guys than girls, for whatever reason, I prefer girls for legal abuse. Especially the shy girls, or if they're a bit fat, or have small boobs, you know, something to mock them for. Like that limbless girl I mentioned. She needed that money, she didn't like it one bit.

Q: I gather that so far you've managed to evade all the legal challenges?

A: Yes, we get sued every now and then, but the cases never stick. We are careful like that. There's always a contract, a ***********, to specify what we're gonna do. We never deviate from that. It's all signed, documented. They consented. If they had bad reasons for that, not our problem. A couple of months ago I was in court and we won, of course. This judge gave us this huge moral lecture on how disgusting we were and so on and how he wished he could put us away and blah blah blah. He was mad he couldn't touch us. There's no law against being sadistic. We always have the last laugh. Like with this girl, when she had lost the case, we highlighted her videos on the website, put them on the front page. Just wanted to make sure everyone sees me eating her pussy.

Q: How would you react if your own daughter was ever recruited for that kind of performance, for legal abuse?

A: (Stops masturbating.) I'd be mad. I'd want revenge, I'd probably want them dead. I know I'm a total hypocrite for saying that. You know, I get why they sue, why they're so mad. We get death threats sometimes. I don't blame them. But they consented and we paid what we said we would.

Q: Wasn't your sidekick Nicky Schultz recruited through this legal abuse?

A: (Resumes masturbation.) Oh, yeah, he was. Couldn't pay the bills. He had been fired for watching porn on the job, lots of porn. He's a porn addict, a chronic wanker, if there ever was one. So we had him jerk off in front of a live audience. We didn't even give him any Viagra or anything. The plan was to have him there, soft as can be, stroking that tiny cock, with everyone laughing. He surprised us all by getting it up and rock hard. And being erect, it was much bigger than I thought it would be. He's a grower. It turned out he was a kind of masochistic exhibitionist. Yes, it's all humiliating for him. Whenever we perform, he jerks off and he's on top of the world. It comes crashing down right after he shoots his load. He's filled with shame. He always tells himself this is the last time, after every fucking cum shot. He's not gonna quit, though. He's addicted to that thrill of masturbating for a living. He's addicted to the shame. Funny thing about Nicky, he's actually trying to shrink his cock. I gave him that idea. Like, what could be even more humiliating than pleasuring yourself for a living? Well, how about doing that with a really small cock? So, he's in the process of doing that, steroids, hormones, that sort of thing. All legal stuff. We'll have to see how that goes. We don't want him to grow boobs or anything. We're not even paying him extra for doing that. He wanted to! When I told him the idea, there was this look of horror in his eyes, like "What have you done to me?". It was so funny. He was horrified, but he was so horrified because he knew instantly he would go through with it. He's addicted to the shame.

Q: Do you feel shame?

A: (Laughs, masturbates furiously for a couple of seconds, then pisses on the floor a little.) Do I look like I feel shame? No, I don't, not anymore. But it took a while to get there. I could help Nicky achieve that same mindset, but he doesn't want that because for him, it's the shame that turns him on. So he has this moral conflict, but that conflict makes him so horny that he can't stop beating his meat in front of a thousand people, on stage, on live streams. He's like me in the sense that he's gone too far to quit. He's known to millions as that guy who wanks for a living. Good luck trying to find another job. But it's cool. He's making a living by doing what he would doing anyway. The guy is a porn addict and even in the old days could spend a few hours a day just pleasuring himself. It's crazy. He masturbates more than I do.

Q: Is there some misconception about you that you would like to clear up now?

A: I'm actually quite smart. I'm not a dumb bimbo, just cause I have a dick up my ass or I eat pussy or piss on the floor. I'm ahead of the curve in fact. What I'm doing is just the logical end point for sexual liberation. I've talked about this with some philosophers, but they didn't agree with me. But, yeah, I'm smarter than people think. Like even in school, before I dropped out, I was getting good grades. I read books. I talk to philosophers.

Q: Do you think people appreciate the effort you put into your work? I mean, you also direct, write, design sets and costumes, those sort of things.

A: Oh, yeah. Like, I've always been very visual, always was good at drawing. A lot of work goes into it. I don't just suck a dick in front of a camera. I work a lot on the camera angles, sets, costumes, lights, all of that. Lots of thought goes into it.

Q: What are some of the fetishes you've been getting into lately?

A: Bodily secretions. I've been into water sports for a long time and I've experimented with scat relatively early on, but only now I've been really getting into it. It's so demeaning to be pooped on. I don't like the taste, I never get used to it. It's always horrible, but that's precisely why it's so humiliating and degrading. Now, in these stage shows, I have guys shitting on me. I swear, they always have like a shitload of chili beforehand or something. They do it on purpose, to get like this explosive fucking diarrhea so they can cover me with me poop. Puking is another. I get a thrill from puking on someone. It's not only exciting to puke, but I've found it's a great way to not get fat. I mean, I usually eat super-healthy and exercise a lot. Like, I live this anorexic lifestyle much of the time, where I starve myself. Every now and then I give in and binge on junk food. Then I discovered how much fun bulimia can be. So I always puke after binging. The anorexia and the bulimia cancel each other out, so on average my weight stays the same. I haven't eaten anything today. I'm performing tonight, so I can't be there all bloated and shit. I starve myself a bit before all the big shows. The alcohol takes effect quicker, too, when I don't eat much. Not gonna lie, I'm already a bit tipsy.

Q: What about violence? Have your performances become more violent over the years?

A: Oh, yes, for sure. I've liked cutting myself for years. Like, I don't know if you can see them so well under the tats, but my arms are full of scars. (Raises her arms towards me to illustrate.) I might cut myself a little when I perform, but I also do it sometimes just by myself. Like, when I masturbate alone I sometimes cut myself. And when I plan my performances these days, I turn to real savage horror movies for inspiration. So I have guys choking me. I might have a noose around my neck. They hit me and I 'm not talking about no light spanking. I mean, they really punch me in the face and kick me in the belly. They burn me with cigarettes or candle wax. I've had acid poured on my skin recently. (Points to a burn mark on her stomach.) I'm not sure whether to keep that burn mark or have it covered with a tattoo. I haven't broken any bones yet, but I'm sure I'll get to that someday.

Q: It's often said that porn performers have been victims of sexual violence themselves and the trauma drove them to the industry. What are your thoughts on that and is it like that in your case?

A: I can't speak for anyone else, but I was never a victim. Of course, I've had experiences that some others would consider harassment or something. Like in school, when I developed that reputation. Guys said a lot of things, but I found them flattering deep down. Especially after my tits were out in magazines, they thought they were giving me the shit, but I enjoyed that attention. And yes, I've been groped sometimes, in a bar, at some party. I take it as a compliment. There was this one occasion where I was really drunk at a party and this guy was touching me and I pretended to be passed out. He fucked me and he really thought he was raping me. There was a similar situation with that underground thing we did in Barcelona. These two guys thought they were raping me. I pretended to fight back. Our team was ready to rescue me if they needed to. We had a safe word, but it never came to that. I was scared shitless, but it was hot, as well. I came after like two minutes. But yeah, those guys thought they were raping me and it was hot. I'm not sure I can be raped, like for real. Cause, if it was like a degrading experience, then I'd probably like that.

Q: Is there any limit, any line you would never cross?

A: For sure. Like, I would never do anything with kids. I would never have sex with animals, either. And I do believe in consent, even if I kind of manipulate someone to get it. No means no. But there are things I would do if I had the chance.

Q: Like what?

A: Like some extreme body modifications. Or have them done to someone else. We've talked about this, in fact, Mike Chavez and me. We've paid some of our legally abused people to get tats or piercings, but what if we got them to do some more radical stuff, like a sex change operation? I'd love to see some desperate guy get a pussy and become a girl. Another is incest. I've never had the pleasure of doing real incest porn, because my fucking cousin Jared chickened out. The people who get to do that are very lucky. Like, I've worked with Jenna and Jason Barr. They're a real-life incest couple, brother and sister, and I really envy that close bond. Like, they even live together and have incest sex everyday. They're always naked, always fondling each other all the time and seeing that makes me wish I had a brother.

Q: What can we expect from tonight's performance? Will you have any legally abused performers on stage?

A: No, and here's the reason why. I'm gonna get absolutely fucking wasted tonight. You can't mix reluctant performers with booze. With legal abuse, there's always a ***********, a contract that is followed one hundred percent. So I need to stay sober, to make sure I don't accidentally do something. Like, if I had an accident, if I puked on one of them and it wasn't in the ***********, they could say there was no consent. They might have a legal case. It happens, you know. When I perform drunk, I have accidents. I wet myself sometimes or I puke. If you see me throw up tonight, it might not be intentional. We have a great show coming up. Some newcomers, some more experienced. Nicky will be there as my hype-man. You know, just wanking on the side. All sorts of things going into my holes, into all three of them. Stuff will come out of all three holes. Lots of bodily secretions, wild group sex, really violent group sex. I don't do stage shows that often because they're so demanding physically. I need time to recuperate after each one. So I try to make each show unforgettable, always pushing the limit a bit. So I imagine it will be a lot for you to handle, if you're not used to watching that type of thing.

Q: What are your plans for the future?

A: I try to stay in the present, as much as I can. Like, the folks in the biz who overdose or kill themselves, I think they did it cause they looked too much into the future. I'll be thirty-three in a couple of months. I don't know how long I can keep this up. With all the violent sex and self-abuse and drinking and drugs and smoking and eating disorders, something's gonna give in eventually. I talked to this shrink a few times and she said I have a death wish. Maybe. I'll keep going as long as I can. Like, so far I've played, when we're doing fake incest porn, I've been playing daughter roles and sister roles. Maybe in a few years I'll be doing mommy roles. Maybe I'll get milf status. I don't know, but I can't think too much of the future. It's dangerous. For the near future, I plan to have a bit of a detox after tonight's show. I've been drinking like a fucking hobo this week, straight whiskey for fucking breakfast. And lay off the cigarettes for a bit. When I don't drink, I get to eat more. My alcoholic phases go hand in hand with my anorexic phases. When I'm sober, I go back to the bulimia. I have this one thing, a long-term plan, can't be done yet. It's sort of a pipe dream, but that would be like an end goal.

Q: What's that?

A: Doing snuff, like real snuff. I've done fake snuff. We hired some people who work on horror films, doing special effects. So I've been killed on film, but it's all been fake. But to do it for real. Like, I've lived for sex and porn for the last twelve years. So might as well die for sex and porn. I've envisioned the whole thing. First of all, they'd abuse the hell out of me, like cutting, maybe amputations, mutilation, whatever, to the point where I'm barely alive, but still conscious. And then some big stud would fuck me with my head in the guillotine. When we both climax, they drop the blade. You know, they say the head might live for a couple of seconds. I would like my last moment to be like that. Being just a severed head on the floor, looking at my decapitated corpse being fucked and that's it. Obviously that's illegal and I always obey the law. But that would be the logical conclusion to my career, the logical end point of sexual liberation. (She climaxes at this point and squirts on the floor, some of the juice spilling on my clothes.)

This seemed like the logical end point to our interview, as well. As we said our goodbyes, she gave me a VIP pass to tonight's performance. What can I say, I had to check it out.

It was billed as a ninety-minute show and I had to admit, I was skeptical such a thing could carry the whole time. She started with a dance number, elaborately dressed, but stripping to her underwear during the song. After the second song was over, she was already completely naked. I was truly surprised of how great a dancer she is, when she is relatively sober, that is, which wouldn't last long. She was joined on stage by various performers, some of them obscure, some of them the biggest names in the adult industry. Her "hype man", Nicky Schultz, joined in on the group sex only briefly, preferring to pleasure himself at the side of the stage. If I counted right, Mona Dee was penetrated by a total of fourteen men during the show and enjoyed various sorts of lesbian action with five women. The sex got increasingly abusive and violent, with the main star becoming increasingly intoxicated. She was choked during intercourse, punched in the face several times, kicked in the ribs, stomped on, cut with razors, burned with candle wax and had ice water poured on her. In addition she swallowed an awful lot of semen, had gallons pissed on her - and most disturbingly, she was defecated and vomited on by some of the performers. She wet and soiled herself and threw up several times during the show, a couple of them seemingly unintentional. Around the half-time, she had drunk her whole bottle of liquor. She proceeded to smash it on her head and was cutting her arms with the glass shards while two men were double-penetrating her and two women were urinating in her mouth. In the final climax all of the male performers, including Nicky, ejaculated inside of her, two or three at a time, while the women offered bukkake action by ejaculating on her face. The encore was a solo act. She concluded the night by masturbating on her own, ejaculating one final time. During the solo sex she tried to get up several times, but was evidently too fatigued and/or intoxicated. She wasn't even capable of speaking coherently. She mumbled something, sounding like a thank you and good night to the audience. It was quite a sight to watch her slowly crawl off the stage amidst a roaring applause, covered in a mixture of semen, female ejaculate, urine, blood, feces and vomit.

Being backstage, I witnessed her wetting herself before losing consciousness, after which paramedics rushed to wash her and took her to a medical room. The performance was bizarre, frightening, disgusting - and arousing. I will admit, there is something fascinating about this woman and how she has turned her whole life into a pornographic performance. At the same time, you cannot help feeling sorry for her and wondering when her obituary will be in the papers. Don't worry folks, the next day she texted me, saying "THX again for a good interview hope you liked the show i don't remember too much have to see the tape. Love, Mona. :D"

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