Bigfoot Crunch and Sweetie Pie Wrecker Service
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#RING#
The loudness of my phone ringing woke me up and I instantly recalled that Carol had stayed the night. As I reached over to get the phone, I heard a giggle from beneath the sheet.
I told her to shush a minute and she told me to shush. With all of that going on, I realized the call was going to the answering machine ... I’ll know who it is, in just a minute.
“BEEP”
“This is your mother, Randall Knight. Do you know where your sister is? She never came home. I’m very worried – please, call me back?”
She sounded very worried – and pissed. Most likely at me ... Again.
Carol said waking up and rubbing her eyes a little, “Are we in deep shit, or are we in deep shit?”
“Such a potty mouth—I don’t think so, C ... I’ll call her in a minute and explain everything to her.”
“Everything?” she snickered.
“Nooooo ... not everything,” I said emphasizing the EVERY. “Go take a shower and I’ll call her back in a minute.”
Pursing her lips, she said, “Don’t you want to wash my back ... and my front?”
“I’ve created a monster, haven’t I?”
She was walking naked to the bathroom and turned around and said, “Maybe.” She slapped her own butt.
I pulled myself together and put some boxers and a shirt on. It seemed silly, but the idea of talking to my mother naked, kind of creeped me out.
I picked up the phone and dialed home, knowing exactly what I was going to say. The phone was answered with a frantic voice, “Carol? Is that you? Young lady, you know better than to not call and be...”
“Mom ... it’s Rann.”
“Oh, Rann, I’m ... I was just so worried. Carol didn’t come home last night, and I was so worried when I saw her bed ... hadn’t been slept in.”
“Mom, calm down—take a breath ... Carol’s with me. She stayed over at my place last night. Our scheduled rehearsal went very late, and we didn’t want to come in and possibly wake you guys. I meant to call you about it, sorry, but it seemed silly to call at one-thirty in the morning. So, Carol stayed over and slept in my guest bedroom. She was my guest.”
Speaking a mile a minute, Mom said, “You didn’t take her out drinking, did you? You know she’s only nineteen and not able to legally drink yet...”
“Mom, don’t worry about a thing? She’s taking a shower right now ... do you want her to call you ... or can I just bring her home in about an hour. I still have to take a shower myself, and then I’m taking her to get some breakfast. So more like an hour and a half. She worked very hard last night ... at rehearsal, and I’m treating her.”
“You’re right, Rann. I’m sorry ... I’m just a little protective of my little girl.”
“So am I, Mom. She’s my little sister. You know I wouldn’t let anything or anyone harm a hair on her pretty little red-head.”
Carol walked out during the last part of the conversation, drying herself off, still naked.
“Is that Mom?” she asked. “Let me talk to her. Mom, it’s me -- Carol? Yes I’m fine. Rehearsal went really late, so I just stayed over here. That’s why he’s a got a guest bedroom, Mother. OK—What?
Yeah, Rann still has to shower. I should be home in about an hour and a half unless I could just stay the night and get home in the morning?”
“Thank you mommy. You were just worried? I understand, If I had a daughter that looked like me, I’d be worried, too. You like that? I thought you would, bye bye.”
We went back to bed, both of us naked and slept for over six hours. Being in love can be exhausting.
She awoke looking up at me, “You still taking me to breakfast, big boy?”
“I am, but first ... man ... need ... shower.”
She giggled.
I overruled her agreement with Mom and decided to get back to Mom’s, after stopping at Mickey D’s for some breakfast. Carol had found another dress in my closet that fit, and she looked lovely, as we were tooling down the 85 back towards La Cienega, where ‘our’ folks live.
She turned to me and sighed.
“Why the big sigh?” I asked.
“After the last 24 hours, I’m really going to miss being with you, Rann.”
“You’re not getting away from me, that easy, Beautiful. We’re just stopping off at the house.”
“What exactly is going on in that devious big brother mind of yours?”
“You’re going to pack a suitcase for staying at my place during the rest of the run of WEST SIDE STORY and after you get that part in SEVEN BRIDES FOR SEVEN BROTHERS, it would make even more sense to just stay with me until...”
“Until, when, Rann?”
“Until I find a bigger place for us both to live.”
“Ohh Rann,” she gave me a huge hug.
“I want a bigger place to entertain you. We could even hold cast parties if we had a bigger place. Besides, if you’re going to live there, I want to have your opinion on the place we get.”
“Did you say—we?” A cute little giggle escaped her mouth.
“Yup ... we. And guess what the next play is after ‘Seven Brides’, come on ... guess?”
“I don’t know ... A LITTLE NIGHT MUSIC?’”
“No!”
“CHICAGO?”
“No!”
“LES MISERABLES?”
“No!”
“Tell me, Rann ... I could guess until my face turned blue. What is it?”
“What’s your favorite movie ever?”
“That would be BEAUTY AND THE BEAST ... oh ... OH... ‘Oh, Rann ... Maybe ... I could be Belle, and you could be ... the Beast, Gaston, or Lumiere or Cogsworth, or...”
“My thoughts, exactly, Carol.”
“When are the auditions, Rann?”
“The afternoon of WEST SIDE STORY’S closing night. You could be very busy this summer.”
“If I’m going to be busy, then so are you bro.”
We pulled up to the house. Mom was still there; probably waiting to make sure her ‘little girl’ was OK.
“Are you ready for this conversation with Mom, or do you just want to get some clothes and bug out?”
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I’d expected Emily to be mortified that I’d found her sleeping naked outdoors, but she made no move to put her discarded bikini back on. Instead, she made idle chit-chat, stretching lazily in the sun. I treaded water as we talked, thinking to myself over and over, Act normal. Act normal. I was so rattled by my close call that I was shaking. I struggled to keep my voice calm. Emily showed no suspicion that I’d done anything while she was sleeping. I was so ashamed of what I’d done that I...
LesbianSo, where do I start....well, I guess it began about a week before:"Jessica why are you bringing me such slutty clothes? You know I don't want to wear them!" Abigail said to her friend and college roommate, in the changing room at the clothes store, staring into the mirror at the whore outfit she'd been forced to try on. "Because we're going out dancing? To have fun? Remember having fun?!" Jessica replied teasingly. Jess was blonde, a real definition of a bimbo, she had perky D cup breasts, a...
My worries began slowly at first then speeded up - friends and workmates were settling into long term relationships in ever increasing numbers. If the trend continued I would soon be the only singleton left sitting at some sad singles bar. Saturday night and I was at home! - alone, feeling sorry for self, listening to Miyuu (what else?), researching; how do bisexual people cope in a long term relationship...all this while couples were sitting on sofas together and binge watching a...
Long Gone Lonesome Blues Written and recorded by Hank Williams. Copyright, Acuff-Rose Music, Inc./Hiriam Music (BMI) Author's note: I was sipping on a scotch - Damn, I gotta stay away from that stuff - last night while working through my email. I was playing my Hank Williams playlist on iTunes, and one of the songs caught my ear. It was of course, "Long Gone Lonesome Blues." This is not as well known as many of his other songs but it has always been one of my favorites. Like many country...
I’m a piano player, not a pianist. I started as a pianist when I was eight or nine, but then I heard Honky Tonk Train Blues, or something. I heard James Booker and Professor Longhair, all the New Orleans guys, and it struck me. I had to sound like that. I never will, but I keep on trying. They’re the greatest piano players ever. The rhythm, the music. Spiritual music. A sound like that can heal a broken heart. And Ragtime. I love that too. Still piano players. All the styles are linked. You...
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