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It was a Tuesday when I had my talk with Cindi and she and Amy had their big hug fest. Victoria came home very late Wednesday night, actually in the wee hours of Thursday morning, so I didn't have a chance to talk to her until Thursday night. I made some excuse to send Amy over to Rebecca's house Thursday night; as far as I knew, she knew nothing about all of this and I was trying to shield her from it all. I was hoping she bought the excuse - yeah, right. The girl is a certifiable genius. I knew it was likely I was the only one who was fooled.
I told Victoria about the rape, omitting any information about the movie. We called Cindi into the room and Victoria talked to her about what had happened.
Although Victoria has always been very calm and laid back at all times, I was still surprised at how calmly she took all of this. When she turned to look at me during the conversation, I saw her eyes, and I got goose bumps all over - I was scared.
Before I started my career in the medical profession I had been trained, and worked, as a law enforcement officer in a very specialized branch of work that received highly specialized training. I don't scare easily. Victoria normally has very expressive eyes. When she smiles, she lights up the whole room, and when she is just acting normal, without smiling, her eyes only light up half the room. This time when she looked at me, her eyes were flat and devoid of all expression. I had seen that look in her eyes once before, a year earlier, when three men tried to hurt Amy. I will never forget that look, nor what she did to those men while I moved Amy to safety and before I could get back to help. The thought suddenly popped into my head that I was glad I wasn't one of those boys
I figured we would go to the police on Friday, but Victoria announced that she had to be out of town Friday and all the weekend. I'm ashamed to say that was one of the few times I've ever been really irritated with her. I asked her if someone else could do it and was even crass enough to imply that her family ought to be more important than anything else. She looked like I had slapped her in the face, then stared at me with big sad eyes.
"Don't you think I want to be there for Cindi"? She looked like she was going to cry, and Victoria never cries. My heart melted; I loved this woman so much, how could I even think of implying what I did?
"I'm sorry, honey, I didn't mean that, I was just ... I don't know why I said it. I know you love the girls as much as I do. I'm sorry, it's been a very trying couple of days." The smile she gave me was forgiveness enough.
The other reason I had been so short with her was I also had to be out of town for my job all weekend. I really didn't want Cindi to be alone while we were both away.
Cindi seemed the sanest of all of us and decided that she and Amy would stay at their grandparents for the weekend. She insisted it was ok - after all, she had been alone for two weeks anyway because she was avoiding or fighting with everyone. It wouldn't hurt to be with her grandparents for two days
Amy came home a little while later from Rebecca's house, and as she walked by me she asked in a quiet voice that no one else could hear, "Did you get it all straightened out?"
Damn! Like I said, certifiable genius. I don't know why I even try to fool her. She never did ask what it was all about, though.
Victoria wouldn't get back into town until late Monday night. Since I would be back Sunday, I told her parents to drop the kids off at the house about two hours before I got home, as they had a scheduling conflict for those two hours. When I walked into the house Sunday afternoon I knew immediately something was wrong.
Cindi was locked in her room, crying, and Amy was almost beside herself, as close to panic as I had ever seen her. When I asked her what was wrong, she had trouble speaking coherently, but finally managed to say that Cindi had read something in the paper, ran into her room crying, and refused to open the door. I told Amy to go to her room and wait there for me until I called her. She rolled her eyes at me as if I was just the biggest dork in the world, stamped her foot in frustration and stomped into her room. Amy doesn't get upset often, but when she does, she makes sure you know all about it. And when she gives you that eye roll, you feel about 2 inches tall...
I finally got Cindi to open the door and sat down next to her on the bed. She immediately hugged me tightly.
"Cindi, honey, what's wrong? Amy is almost out of her mind with worry."
"It's them, Daddy," and she handed me the paper.
The front-page story was of a SUV with three teenage boys in it traveling at high speed, running off the road late Saturday night on a deserted stretch of highway. All three boys were killed instantly. I recognized the pictures of all three from the movie I'd seen, although I didn't let on that I knew who they were. The paper mentioned that an investigation was still ongoing, as there was some suspicion their car might have been forced off the road. I felt chills go up and down my body. After the look in Victoria's eyes on Thursday night, then the sudden unscheduled trip out of town, I sincerely hoped the sudden thought I had wasn't true.
Things seemed to return pretty much to normal over the next two weeks. Cindi and Amy were best friends again, Cindi seemed much happier, although she had occasional moody periods, and Victoria was back to out of town much of the time. Like I said, back to normal. I've never been able to figure out how all of us can love her so much. The whole family gets along so well and functions so well, even when she is seldom around. Just shows how truly special she is.
There was one thing that occurred during those two weeks, a change that ended up being very significant, although I didn't realize its significance until later.
Monday night we all went to bed as usual. Victoria wasn't getting back until late Monday night. About two hours after I went to sleep I suddenly woke up. Something was different. Then I realized that someone was in bed with me, snuggled up alongside me. At first, I thought Victoria had arrived home early, but then realized that was probably not it, as she always wakes me up, usually in a very delightful way.
- 08.06.2020
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