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Deja Vu AscendancyChapter 186: My First Day As A Millionaire free porn video
Saturday, May 7, 2005 (Continued)
Once I was sitting at my desk again, with my schoolwork open around me, I couldn't help noticing that this wasn't a particularly thrilling way to spend my first morning as a multi-millionaire, but I couldn't think of what else to do (not strictly true, as Carol was sitting a few feet away and I had no trouble thinking of what I'd like to do with her). To distract myself, I decided to spoil myself by writing the sexy spreadsheet that I'd thought of before: Julia had suggested a big notice board at school that would list my day-by-day profits from my day trading cover story. Prof had suggested the profits started low and built up higher and higher, reaching just over half a million at the end. I wanted to write a spreadsheet that would generate the daily values for me, in a fun way.
I fired up Excel and specified the first three variables from which everything else was going to flow:
Amount To Allocate: $6,700,000.
Over How Many Days: Julia had suggested $500,000 as the top value. Linearly between $0 and $500,000 meant an average daily profit of $250,000, but I wanted a learning curve rather than linear, so the average might be closer to $350,000. That would need 19-odd days. So I started with an initial value of 20 in this field.
Learning Ratio: I chose 5. This was how much better I wanted to seem to get. My last day's profit would be 5 times higher than my first day's profit, with the days in between interpolated.
In the working area of the spreadsheet, I had the first column containing the day number, from 1 to HowManyDays (20). The second column was a "Base Amount", a flat allocation of the amount, AmountToAllocate / HowManyDays ($6,700,000 / 20 = $335,000).
The next column was a little fancier. I wanted it to be a "Learning Factor", a factor that modified the base amount up or down to simulate me apparently having a learning rate. I wanted to multiply the first day's profit by 1/Sqrt{LearningRatio}, and the last day's profit by Sqrt{LearningRatio}, so the last day's profit would be LearningRatio (5) times higher than the first's, and to interpolate the other 18 days. That was quite easy to do, but resulted in a distortion because the linear interpolation between 0.45 and 2.24 produced an average value of 1.34. The factor had to average 1.00, or I'd end up 'earning' more than $6.7 million. The obvious solution was to normalize all the ratios by dividing them by 1.34. So I ended up with a "Learning Factor Raw" column, followed by "Learning Factor Normalized" column, which was the previous row's value divided by the average of the previous column.
The next two columns were two random numbers between 0.5 to 1.5, with the next column ("Random") being the average of the previous two, as a simple way of dampening the random variations.
The last column was the "Daily Profit", calculated as the "Base Amount" ($335,000) times "Learning Factor Normalized" times "Random". I rounded the answer to the nearest thousand, which looked nicer. The Daily Profit formula had an IF statement, so if DayNumber equaled HowManyDays (i.e., it was the last day), then its value was AmoutToAllocate minus the sum of all the previous daily profits, to guarantee that the total amount of profit was correct.
Then I created a graph of the "Daily Profit" column.
I hit F9 (Recalculate) repeatedly, waiting for a graph that looked as if I'd learned quickly initially then slowed down, had the last day with a value just over $500,000, and in which the daily variations looked 'nice'.
It only took a few seconds to hit a combination of random numbers that produced a sexy looking graph, so I copy/pasted the resultant values into the next column (so they wouldn't be lost the next time Excel recalculated). The last two values were $501,000 and $519,000, so I cheated by manually changing them to $499,000 and $521,000. I could imagine the excitement that would have occurred at school if I'd reached $499,000 in one day, followed by $521,000 the next, followed a day later by $0 because, "I stopped because I have enough money now, and besides, exams are coming up soon and I really should do some revision."
I leaned back to admire the spreadsheet. I thought of showing it to Carol, but it wasn't really her thing, so I just admired it for a few more seconds, then exited Excel. Sigh.
My non-sexual way of celebrating my wealth over with, I turned to my schoolwork. Us multimillionaires lead exciting lives.
Half an hour later there was a knock on the study door. "Just me," called Prof's voice.
Prof entered, then told us, "My PI advisor got back to me with the information I requested. I've booked a company to come to Corvallis on Monday to sweep our houses, cars and workplaces. It'll take them most of the day and they'll need access to your car at some stage. After school should be fine. They'll either be at your house or ours, so find them and give them your car to check, okay?"
"With pleasure."
[Both Mom and Dad took a risk by declining to have their workplaces swept. Dad didn't have one, and laughed at the idea of someone spending hours listening to lawn mowers being discussed and assembled. He didn't talk about anything sensitive to our family in the middle of the factory floor anyway. Mom would have to inform her boss to have her workplace swept by a security team (they'd notice several guys waving electronic instruments all over the place, crawling under desks, lifting the ceiling tiles, etc.) Actually Mom wouldn't be able to get the team anywhere near her desk unless she got permission first, and that would have to go way up the ladder in her company, and would no doubt piss off several senior managers. Mom discussed it with Vanessa and Prof and they agreed not to worry about it. If there were any bugs on us, the baddies should be frantically getting rid of them, knowing that a team was coming to sweep for them on Monday. Prof and Vanessa weren't concerned about having to tell their bosses. Prof said his Department Head would find it amusing and interesting.]
Prof continued, "I've also got the list of phone models not to buy. I'm going to go buy myself a new one now, do you want me to pick you up one too?"
"Yes please. I've gotten used to having one and find it a nuisance to be without."
Carol started making peculiar noises, so we turned to look at her. She explained, "Guys are weird! How can you just let Prof buy a phone for you sight unseen? Don't you want to check them all out yourself?"
"Why? I just want a phone. If I went with Prof, I'd buy the first one they showed me, and Prof can do that just as well as I can. Actually Prof, you should probably call Julia first, in case she's got some specific requirements. I know she talked about getting one with a camera, which might be useful one day. And maybe one that can record more than three minutes of audio too, although I can't say I'm fussed about either issue particularly."
"Okay. I'll call her from the store once I see what choices they've got."
"But," objected Carol, "don't you care what it looks like? The color, style, image, etc."
"Good point, Carol. Prof, please get me a phone that conveys the image that I'm a wonderful guy, very smart and with a great sense of humor. If it comes in a color that makes girls want to remove their panties, then that'd be good too."
"Haha. Of course. I was thinking of going for, 'Distinguished and Refined' myself. I think Vanessa would be upset with me if I bought a phone that caused girls panties to fall down all around me."
Carol accused, "Guys are impossible! You've got no idea how important it is to choose the right phone, have you?"
We agreed we didn't.
"Don't blame me if Julia takes one look at it, throws it away, then takes you to the store herself."
"Umm, yeah, I can see that happening. Maybe I should let Julia choose my phone. She does tend to have pretty strong opinions about unimportant stuff like this." Carol poked her tongue out at me.
Prof chuckled. "Okay. I'll just get one for myself."
Prof left. I made a mental note to think about buying Carol a new cellphone - of her choice - for her birthday in a couple of months. [Carol beat me to it, getting herself a new one almost immediately. I made a mental note that I needed a new mental note for what to get Carol for her birthday.]
Carol said, "I saved you from making a big mistake there."
"It's a good thing my sister can help me avoid mistakes with my girlfriend, and vice versa, because I sure need help."
We went back to schoolwork, until I heard the doorbell ring. I suspected Ava was early, so Carol and I went down to check. Yep.
It was a nice reunion, although Ava was much less frantic than I'd expected. She hadn't known enough to be worried, merely that Carol and Julia had been worried. It was soon clear that she also didn't know about the danger of being overheard by bugs, because she started talking about Carol's and my relationship. Fortunately I could cut her off fast enough, saying, "Ava, let's go somewhere pleasant to talk, and have some lunch in a while too. Can we go in your car, because I've been driving hundreds of miles recently." Also because we didn't have to worry about her car having a bug.
That was agreed. We told Andrew we were going for a drive, then headed out.
We got in the car, and started driving down Julia's street. Ava asked, "Where're we going?"
No one cared much, and after a minute or two Ava said, "Can I ask for something?"
"Of course. What have you got in mind?"
"I missed seeing you bowl 300 because I'd been a bad girl just before that. Can we see if we can get a lane and you do that again. I like bowling, and I'd love to see you do that."
I didn't want all the drama again, but I'd previously thought of a solution to that. That left the problem of the baddies following me to the bowling alley and seeing me do my thing there. It was unlikely, but it was possible, and it might give them a clue about how Prof had won at roulette.
I said, "Okay. But there are a couple of conditions. First, I will bowl strikes every time, but every frame we'll rearrange who bowls when, that way the scorekeeping computer won't know that I've bowled a perfect game. I don't want all the fuss or publicity of another perfect game. Do you understand what I mean?"
"I think so."
"That won't be as exciting as the usual way, but you'll see that I've done it, even if the computer and all the other patrons don't understand that I did. Do you still want to do it?"
"There won't be any excitement at all. That's a pity, but I guess I'd still like to see you do it, even if it will seem very flat."
"The second condition is that I want to drive us to the alley."
"It's not far. It's easier if I do it."
#3:
Jo
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