An Officer and a GentlemanChapter 12 November Giving Thanks
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The Starr DAs were as good as the gunsmith had promised them to be. He had reworked the loading lever to be an empty shell ejector, so nothing was wasted. It still took much longer to reload these pistols than it did the S&Ws, but they made excellent backup weapons. I had a special holster made to let me hide the modified Starr in my boot, and the other one was carried in a saddle bag. I was now carrying a total of 15 bullets in conveniently reached holsters, so I felt that I was covered for all foreseeable occasions. I still carried my bowie knife and my Arkansas Frog Sticker for those really rare occasions when a gun was not appropriate.
Jeff and I decided to swing south, now that it was beginning to cool off for winter. Actually, it was not the temperature so much as the wind that pushed me south. I got tired of that cutting wind real fast. I wanted to head home, and Jeff had no other place to go, so I invited him to spend the winter at our farm. He was reluctant to commit for more than a few days, but all I needed was an opening.
On the way south, we encountered a fool in a saloon who was sure that he could take on both of us, especially since we were "kids." He drew on us, and we both got off a shot before his revolver even cleared leather. He was worth $65 and we didn't have to tote him far to find the marshal's office. We collected our money and were on our way in short order.
Our next catch was at one of those combination places at a crossroads. We had stopped off for lunch and had just started on our beef and beans when three men came stomping into the restaurant. Jeff and I recognized them as wanted bank robbers to the tune of $550 for the three of them. Several other people, including two women, were in the restaurant, so we held off. We didn't want innocent people to be hurt, especially women.
We ate slowly, hoping that the three would finish before us, but they seemed to be in no great hurry, either. Finally, we could not stall any longer, so we paid our bill, another one of those outrageous 50 centers. We went out on the veranda to wait for them to come out. Jeff smoked a cigar, but I had not acquired the habit, yet.
It took those three crooks a hell of a long time to eat, but they eventually showed up. We let them get to their horses and start to mount before Jeff said, "Y'ALL ARE UNDER ARREST FER BANK ROBBERY! STAY WHERE Y'ALL ARE, AN' WE WON'T SHOOT!" Now, we knew that they were not going to do like Jeff said, so we were prepared with our guns drawn.
Maybe I'll understand when I get older, but those fools went for their guns, even though we had them covered. Whatever the reason was for them trying to draw, they never got very far. One might have survived if he had dropped to the ground under his horse before he tried to draw, but that didn't happen. Jeff and I opened up and had killed all three of the bank robbers before we emptied our guns. I had fired four shots and Jeff had fired three, so the robbers were well and truly dead.
The horses were more upset by the smell of blood than they were by the sound of the gunshots, but they didn't do more than move around a little, even though they were no longer hitched to the rail. People came pouring out onto the veranda, stupid as that sounds, but went back inside as soon as they saw that the excitement was over.
Jeff and I went through the pockets, etc., of the crooks and found a few dollars, but we were stunned when we looked through the saddle bags and found $7,065 in gold coins and bars. Shit, this must be loot from one or more bank robberies. What were we going to do with it? We didn't make a lot of noise about it until we were well away from the building.
We stopped and discussed how to handle the discovery. Neither one of us knew where the money had come from, nor how many banks had been involved. We wondered if we should turn it in somewhere or keep it as spoils of war just like any other gold we would find on somebody we shot. This was a conundrum that we could not answer for now.
We divided the money between us to get it out of the crooks' saddle bags before we sold the tack. We decided to postpone any decision for now and just go along as if we had not found it. I decided that I would ask my lawyer friend, Jason McCall, for his advice.
The crooks were turned in and we collected our bounty. We were now filthy rich, at least until we decided what to do with the bank loot. We felt that we needed to make a decision pretty damned soon, so we hurried home. I had asked Jeff not to say anything about the loot until after we had talked to Jason McCall. He agreed, so there was a lot of good feeling as he met the family, and I got hugs and kisses from everybody. I noticed that there was a spark jumping between Jeff and Martha. Aha, was there something here?
We didn't have a spare room, so Jeff slept in my bed with me, but that was no problem; we often did that in hotels on the road. I waited a couple of days and then said that Jeff and I needed to visit my lawyer. This raised a few eyebrows, but no great questions.
Jeff and I rode to Hobson to see the lawyer. We had to wait a few minutes because Jason was talking to another client. When they finished, Jason came out and greeted me warmly. I introduced him to Jeff and explained that we needed some advice.
We went into Jason's office, and I explained the situation. I told him that we were simply holding the loot right now while we were trying to come to a decision about what to do with the money. I said that as far as we could see, our choices were to keep the money, just as we would with any other money we found on somebody that we killed in the "line of duty," or to turn the money in as a special case. However, we simply had no idea where to turn the money in, if we decided to go that way.
Jason said, "Gentlemen, first of all, let me congratulate y'all for having a sense of ethics. Most people would just keep the money an' not say anything ta anybody. I can't speak directly ta yer consciences, but I don't think that I have ta. I seems ta me, that the best legal advice I kin give ya is ta consider the money as found treasure. Ifen ya had found the money in some cave, there would be no question of it belonging ta y'all. Therefore, I think that y'all kin keep the money with a perfectly clear conscience. Now, y'all kin go do anythin' ya like with the money. My advice is to have fun! Now, I'm gonna charge y'all a $5 consultation fee. I can't work for free, ya know." The last was said with a smile.
We thanked Jason for his advice, and I dropped a half-eagle on his desk. We shook hands and went home. Man, that was a relief! Now I could tell Ma and John that we were rich. I'd leave it up to them to figure out what we would do with all that money.
When we got home, I called everybody together and told them about the money. They were flabbergasted! None of us had ever seen that much money before, and they were doubly shocked when I told them that I was leaving it up to them to figure out what to do with the money. I pulled out the saddle bag and dumped my share of the money on the table. That was a hell of a pile of gold! I couldn't help being a little bit amused: Martha was just this side of fainting!
I asked Ma what she would like to do with the money. She thought for a minute and said, "I shore would like a bigger house. This was as big as Pa could afford when we built it, but I think that now we kin afford ta add on a couple of rooms.
I asked John what he wanted to do. He said that he didn't know for sure, but he was kind of sweet on Ann Simmons. Now that they had a little money ahead, he would like to ask her to marry him. Everybody in the family, including Jeff, cheered at that. We hugged him and patted him on the back. He grinned at that encouragement, and said that he might just visit the Simmons this afternoon.
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