Rendezvous in Chicago
- 4 years ago
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Hairy
I don’t know ... but I simply had to get away. “She’s not in my future.”
“Damn! I was afraid of that.” At first I was ruminating in my mind; now I was vocalizing.
“You guys know everything,” I said, a little louder than necessary.
“Did you say something, sir?” That from the driver. Rats.
“Nothing to concern you,” I said shortly ... and grumpily ... too.
“Oh.” The ‘oh’ of Oh ... shit, there goes my tip.
“I didn’t mean to sound testy just now. I’m having the worst of bad days.”
“Women problems, sir?”
“How did you know?”
“It always is, sir. If we didn’t need ‘em to breed, we’d have hunted ‘em to extinction.”
“Tell me about it.”
“Sir. We were a bunch better off when girls had cooties.”
“Ain’t that the truth.”
“Then we got nuts and they got tits and it was all over but the shouting.”
“How did you get so smart?”
“Masters in Psychology.”
“And you’re driving a limo?”
“No Doctorate.”
“There’s some truth in that.”
“At least it’s not in the Arts.”
“Would you like fries with that?”
We both laughed ... he laughed HaHA ... and I laughed sheesh.
We entered the airport grounds. He popped open the trunk. I grabbed the duffle. He grabbed the suitcase. He dropped the case at the flight desk. I still had the duffle on my shoulder.
“Tickets?” Asked the desk attendant. She was startlingly beautiful.
“Let me guess, Japanese, American, and Mexican.”
“Right the first time,” she smiled, and I forgot where I was. “Tickets?”
“Why, yes. Two to Denver.”
The attendant looked around.
“One ticket is for me ... the other is for the duffle.”
“What is in the duffle?”
“Would you believe two million dollars?”
“No.”
“Good.” I said, “Two to Denver ... on the Maytag.”
“We don’t fly Maytags.”
“I know ... you fly Aero Commander 500’s”
“Why?”
“Do I call them Maytag?”
“Yes.”
“During the War, the Japanese flew a G4M Bomber, code named Betty, over the ‘canal. The engines were deliberately out of sync so the Americans would know what was coming. The aircraft would circle our end of the island dropping small bombs all night long ... nobody got any sleep. The Marines called the plane “Washing Machine Charlie.” Maytag.”
“I see ... how fascinating.”
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CORA What am I going to do? “Retain a lawyer, mom,” said David IV. “What?” “Retain a lawyer.” David said, “You asked me what you should do.” “Did I say that out loud?” “What?” “What am I going to do?” “Yup,” Dave IV said. “Yes, mom,” Beck said. Beck is actually Cherish Rebecca ... We had a brain fart when she was named. She was supposed to be Christopher Robin but she was a girl ... so ... The song Cherish sung by The Association had been popular during our “Hot Summer” as a couple....
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Hairy Sleep wouldn’t come ... there was the little problem with anatomy, I was rock hard ... and bigger than life ... my last life. The girls noticed. “Oh ... he’s awake,” said the younger sister. “Of course, I’m awake,” I said. “Well, you’ve been ... reluctant. And mean about it,” said first wife. “We’ve been wondering...” said the younger. She was tentative in sliding lower. I liked the direction she was taking. Promising. “Spring? Look what I found,” she said to her sister. “Be...
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Charlie Charles William (Named after Paternal Grandfather) I will answer to Chuck, Charles, Charlie or ChuckieBill, but not to CW or any other southern euphemisms. I was born in Texas but never lived there. I AM NOT A TEXAN. I found this journal in the car...the Volvo...while I was transferring about a million Volvo parts from one backseat to another. All those Volvo parts were still in the original Swedish boxes. New water pumps; six, distributors; eight, points, three dozen spark plugs,...
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Chuck “American Automobile Association. How may I assist you?” “My mom...” “One moment, please.” “Yes, Ma’am.” I’m certain she didn’t hear me. I dithered. The sound of a connection: “Is your mom a member?” “She says she is.” “May I have her particulars. please?” “Well, she’s peculiar...but I don’t know about particular.” A chuckle. “By particulars I mean her name...” “Mom.” “So I assume...what name does she give when introduced to other people?” “Cora Jo or Mrs....
Cora Charles said, “Turn left, mom ... your other left.” He reached in his pocket and hauled out a Sharpie. Before I could stop him he wrote a huge R on my shifter hand, reached across and put an L on the other. Then he said, “Maybe we won’t have to make so many U-turns in the middle of freeway traffic.” “Charles William! I do not make U-turns on the freeway!” That required giving it a think, “Well, maybe once or twice.” I made my U-turn so I could go to Charles’ left. I looked around....
Cora I spent waaay more than I planned on. In the five days while we were waiting on the Royce I shopped away nearly fifty thousand dollars. Dresses, blouses, slacks, underwear ... shoes ... lots of shoes. Clothes for Charles ... and clothes for his alter ego ... Chuck. Add to that the twenty grand I spent on the Roller: Brakes; new drums, relined shoes, rubber lines, stainless metal lines. The mechanic showed me the almost rusted through old lines and had me poke an icepick through...
Cora Ya know ... holding that big ziplock full of dreams ... I missed my man. Take that anyway you wish. I laughed. Chuck looked the question. Back down the road a piece, there was a sort of a visitors center ... kinda. A wide spot with a pull off that made a turn or two and ended up in a parking lot. There was a sign board commemorating the Show of Shows. It listed the bands ... some of whom I’d never heard of ... and some of the eventual greats; Santana, Hendricks, Grace Slick and the...
Cora Asia snatched the ziplock baggie out of my hand and sprinted it over to the person I assumed was her father. “Here, Zen,” she said. Or maybe not. Most children don’t refer to their parents by their first names. Who am I kidding? David IV always called us Dave and Cora. Beck didn’t start calling me Cora until she moved out of my house and Charlie never did ... mostly ... never did. The two grown women were making a beeline towards the man but when I supplied the bag they made a severe...
Cora At the Best Western in Callicoon, New York, Chuck and I had a Mom-Son talk. I had in mind a how to keep your girlfriend out of the family condition and still keep her satisfied chat. I intended to make it an illustrated discussion. Somehow ... it didn’t quite work out like I had planned. “Chuck. We need to talk.” “Gosh, mom. We’re not even going steady,” he said. “You want to break up?” Since I ... we ... were on the beginning of the down side of up ... that slippery slope that...
Cora Just outside of Binghamton, I said, “You’re tall enough. Wanna learn to drive?” “If you’re going to teach me? No.” “Gee, thanks Chuck.” “You’re welcome, mom.” “No, I was thinking about driving school. I’ve heard of defensive driving and there’s several places that teach it.” “Are you going to learn too?” “Why? I drive just fine,” I said. “I was thinking if you took the school, too, I wouldn’t drive better than you,” he said. “Although ... it wouldn’t take much.” “What?” “Mom...
Chuck Mom signed me up for the full course; Defensive, Bodyguard, Embassy and Racing. The racing included five laps at full throttle in one of several BMW mid-engined M1 Procar race cars the school had for lease to wealthy Saturday racers. She took a test drive with an instructor ... she failed. “Ma’am, in the words of Ralph Nader, you are unsafe at any speed. You don’t watch the road, your situational awareness stinks. You ride the clutch, pay no attention to your mirrors, over-rev the...
Hairy “You fellas want to tell me where and when I am?” “I was in Texas in 1976.” “What am I going to do for money?” Hmm. “Lottery ticket.” I had to give that a good long think. “This ticket belongs to the guy who owns this shirt.” “Maybe so. But I’m an honest idiot.”
Hairy “You fellas pick the damnedest destinations for a road test.” Now ... I have to admit ... I was in better shape. This body was tweaked when I took over management but it was still a bit weak. Staying at the Kiwanis Campground might be free, but it’s at the tip of the 21/3 runway and it can be a touch noisy. The PBY 6A parked wherever they parked it. A pair of P&W 1,200 hp R-1830-92 engines with stub exhaust is loud. The bunch...
Hairy We drove along in silence. I could feel her eyes on me. That she was nervous went without saying. I ignored her. She wasn’t a beauty ... but she had a quiet loveliness that grows on you. Can you think of anything worse than ignoring a pretty girl? Even though I hate Interstate travel, I stuck to 90 when I could and Old US 10 when I couldn’t. Livingston, Big Timber, Reed Point, Columbus, Park City, and Laurel, Montana went by with scarcely a look. Billings is a sad town, but it is...
By Sunday the place was livable. I had a lock on Karen’s bedroom door and she had both keys. I had the washhouse cleared and the coal fired hot water heater hooked up to the the gasoline Maytag. The Maytag was already there. Karen hinted me to death so I took out the old electric stove and hooked up the even older wood range. That meant a journey to Ranchester Ranch Supply for a chainsaw, fuel, bar oil, files, axes, wedges, a sledgehammer. While I was there I arranged for Kewitt Coal to...