Pick-up Loop HoleChapter 17: Walk Funny free porn video

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I was sleeping in the arms of a tiger and a wolf. In the dream world I was far wiser than in the real world. Answers were easy. Lucid dreamers are aware that we are dreaming. It is one reason my "willing suspension of disbelief" is so difficult to achieve while watching movies. Normal humans enter a hypnotic state when watching movies—and the Bab Lab indicates that our primate cousins, the Olive Baboon, do the same. It's easier to willingly suspend disbelief when hypnotized. Memory is state-dependent for me. I have to be in the same mind frame to relive an experience. Some call it a photographic memory! Despairing of remembering all that I was learning in the dream world I accessed a sleep learner switch to record my dreams. Svetlana moved in her sleep and I adjusted. Calgary and her cubs—and Kimba, the albino lion—shifted as well. Why was that?

AI Ramses let me know that it was time to wake up, a silent alarm clock. As I swam through the layers of consciousness the animals on my sleep pad woke up too.

"How about breakfast?" I asked my four-footed stepchildren. "I have a busy day ahead of me."

I had food replicators in my quarters but seldom used them. Food was everywhere. I could even dine in Conference Room Four, the most-often used of the conference rooms, at least by me. Conference Room One was now nicknamed the Throne Room and Lilith, the station governor, used that one for formal receptions, for visitors both in person and virtual when they came from outside the station. More often used was the food replicator in my office. I dined in the mess hall often, too—but most of my meals were taken in the kennel and stable deck where I regularly exercised with the many animals. Did we have that many?

One place I avoided dining other than token bites was the Baboon Laboratory. I didn't sleep there, either. I was ENEMY to the baboons and well aware of that fact. There were two exceptions: Fannie Mae anytime, and Sally Mae when she was away from the other baboons. Fannie Mae was her own baboon, but Sally Mae followed the crowd—even when the crowd put her down. Have I told you lately that humans and baboons are alike?

The kennels were usually a busy place. The big cats liked their nap time—spent most of every 24 hour period sleeping. The dogs liked to run and bark—social creatures make lots of noise to tell their world—their pack—that the critter exists. The horses liked to eat and run. Herbivores ate low-quality food, nutritionally speaking. It takes a lot of grass to keep a horse healthy.

As I dialed up breakfast for my four-footed family I remembered my dreams, sort of. The Sa'arm were not known to be farmers, nor were they known to practice animal husbandry. They gathered organics and, according to the reports, reduced them to food pellets. I had a declassified report on the Sa'arm recovered in stasis by myself and the crew of Messenger of the Gods. Sa'arm had the ability to hibernate. That wasn't a good thing—but in addition to hibernation, the Sa'arm recovered had been in stasis as well. Hibernation consumed more resources than stasis. Was food their Achilles Heel? Hunter-gathers needed lots of land to live. Human hunter-gatherers required about ten square kilometers for sustained existence—given that the land in question met certain criteria. Very rich land would support more, and the poor lands of the Arctic or Sahara required hundreds of square kilometers to keep one hunter-gatherer fat and happy.

By contrast, "traditional agriculture" would support 500 times the humans that hunter-gatherer technology could. Experimental agriculture could support 5000 people in those ten square kilometers—and possibly more.

Want proof? Many fishing grounds are "fished out." How much of that is due to over-fishing and how much climate change or man-made pollution affected the fish population is a scientific wild-assed guess, nothing more—because no measured baseline is available. When a dozen fishing boats haul in all the fish they can sell and a century later a thousand fishing boats all return with empty nets with significant changes to the ocean, it's not measuring apples to apples. Your proof is going to be hard to find because fish farming saturates the environment and isn't as cheap as simply harvesting Nature's bounty—until there is no more.

A billion Sa'arm unleashed on Planet Earth would quickly denude the land of edibles. Earth could—at most—support about a hundred million hunter-gathering humans. A billion human hunter-gatherers isn't sustainable. It would take more than a billion Sa'arm units to conquer Earth—if we humans got our act together and eradicated the Sa'arm. One quick way would be Scorched Earth—burn everything edible within 100 kilometers of the Sa'arm hive and keep it burned.

Would the Sa'arm adapt to raping the sea like we humans do? I don't know. But my calculations were that a billion Sa'arm would eat everything organic on the land areas within a decade. Fighting against human weapons such as the Roman Plow (salt the fields so that nothing will grow there again), Agent Orange (and other herbicides), Man's first Weapon of Mass Destruction—Fire, and the dreaded nuclear option could starve the Sa'arm out in less than ten months, depending upon how much food the Sa'arm imported from the stars. '

Of course, it wouldn't be a picnic for humans—we'd return to the womb of the oceans and complete the destruction of Earth for the Sa'arm by sweeping oceans clean of life—unless we practiced sea agriculture and the Sa'arm left humans undisturbed.

Fat chance!

Seven billion humans—and at maximum effort, one billion human soldiers—the Sa'arm would have their hands full with an unprecedented challenge. Competition between Sa'arm and humans for food—and oxygen (part of the cycle)--would devastate Planet Earth. And the Sa'arm were predicted to arrive in force in ten years.

Not an appetizing breakfast thought. I dined lightly and it wasn't due to stress—I was working out today with the six Space Marines assigned to the station. A cup of mocha, two big buttered croissants with orange marmalade, and I was ready for prime time! I would eat again in three hours—brunch! Meanwhile my bedtime companions were gorging themselves on their rations.

Six nude, muscular women were taking turns on a large wrestling mat. The other animals watched—and I wonder if the dogs and horses wagered on their favorites. Would betting mean anything to my fur kids? The erotic sight of six naked women practicing different wrestling holds on each other soon had my attention—but not all of it. I noticed a crowd enter the kennels area even over the incessant barking. My attention was on the glistening nude bodies in front of me until the group got within ten meters. Tess—in her burka-like modified Civil Service uniform—was leading Victoria Williams in her own Civil Service uniform. There were nine other people with them—and one wore Space Marine green. The rest were naked. I noted that two were obviously pregnant.

"This is Tom," Tess announced to the crowd. "That's 'Lieutenant Lawrence' to you, Private Martin and 'Master Tom' to the rest of you. Tom, you know Victoria. These are the adult concubines that she selected for herself and her brother. The concubines are in training. Private Martin will be training with you and Ensign Williams."

"You're naked!" Private Martin squeaked. He was staring at my erect penis.

"Private Martin managed to get a 6.8 CAP score," Tess continued, her irritation masked. "I stole your idea and adopted the children at the mission. These other children are fourteen and over—adults in the eyes of the Confederacy—and they volunteered to be CAP tested here and take their chances as concubines. You did that with us a while ago—we volunteered on speculation and CAP tested here in the station. Private Martin is seventeen and he has been taking care of the others. I told you how they stayed alive. Father O'Riley gave them food and shelter and medical treatment—but couldn't keep them out of the sex trade."

"Juan surprised me," Victoria confessed. "He got a higher CAP score than I did."

"He's been taking care of the younger children," Tess explained. "He was their pimp, their protector, their business manager. What's going on here?"

"Gracie Jujitsu," I said. "They are learning advanced scientific wrestling. I was just about to butt in."

"Like that?" Victoria asked, pointing at my jutting prick.

""We like him that way," Bo, one of the Space Marines, said as she wiped her face with a towel. "Besides, the animals like watching us fuck. They really like it when Lieutenant Lawrence does us all doggie style."

"He has an appointment in the Baboon Laboratory," Tess explained. "He is using that obvious arousal as a psychological weapon to intimidate the other baboons. Have you seen a baboon penis?"

"Private, fix your uniform," I had been a US Army sergeant for a long time and correcting uniform violations was a good way to hide my own embarassment. "Your gig line is off. Your cap is supposed to be squared off. You have one trouser leg bloused and the other loose. When you wear your uniform, wear it correctly and wear it with pride."

"Goddess Lilith wants him naked at all times," Tess said. "He's part of Ensign William's platoon and Ensign Williams wants his Space Marines wearing the uniform. Being a former sex worker doesn't make Private Martin a pervert!"

Tess was joking. Normally Tess was nude in line with the station dress code.

"Lieutenant Lawrence sends a message to the animals when he is naked like them," Tess explained. "He shows them that he is no better than they are. They respond to that."

"In twenty minutes I need to be in the Baboon Laboratory," I announced. "Fenton has been modified to specifications and he will rejoin the baboon troop today. Private, you will participate in close order drill because it used to be how armies fought armed mobs—and won even when out-numbered ten-to-one. It will give you insight into the Sa'arm, the best-drilled soldiers in the known galaxy."

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When Jesse finally arrived at Grandma's he was tired ... damn tired. He had been riding in the car in the summer heat all the way to the coast, then on a ferry, then on ANOTHER ferry, and then he finally arrived at Grandma's manufactured house on some crappy dumb island he didn't even remember the name of, it's that boring. While his Mom and Dad caught up with his Grandma and Grandpa in the living room, he took his suitcase to his usual bedroom, only to find the bed unmade and girl clothes...

1 year ago
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Pickled To Meet You

Narook's legs were heavy by the time he reached his destination. There was nothing else on his mind than to get a good meal and then off to bed. But the traveling bard still had to stop and appreciate the sight before him. Narook had heard plenty of tales about the Dragon's Hoard tavern. Yet standing before it was another beast altogether. It wasn't uncommon for taverns and inns to pop up along travel routes. However, they usually were close to settlements. The farther away...

2 years ago
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Night Walkers Opposites

NIGHTWALKERS: OPPOSITES BY MAGGIE FINSON Author's Note: I am using The Nightwalker world with ScramblerJ's kind permission. All characters appearing in Hunter's tale, the first story in this world, and the world set-up are ScramblerJ's property. Any characters appearing in this story (with the above-mentioned ones excepted) are mine. If you find a few things different, consider it my fault and my fault only. I hope you enjoy this one. Chapter I A bedlam of...

1 year ago
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Reddit NSFW Funny

Reddit NSFW Funny, aka r/NSFWFunny! There are a lot of NSFW funny porn sites out there, and they've been active since the early 2000s - I remember being on the old "FunnyJunk" and opening up NSFW stuff that was meant to be "funny" just so I could fap to it like the horny middle schooler I was. Nowadays, this genre of "funny porn" is still active, and even though it has spread around enough the internet to be considered a serious genre, it's still viewed as a very alternative representation of...

Reddit NSFW List
1 year ago
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Sleepwalking

Sleepwalking By Morpheus I was just a sophmore in high school when I discovered my unusual talent. One night I said good night to my Mom and Dad, same as every night, then said good night to my sister Annie, who was a year older than me, again like I did every night, and went to bed. Nothing at all unusuall. But when I was sleeping, I think I had a rather strange dream, though I couldn't remember what it was once I woke up. Only an odd sense of drifting, perhaps of...

4 years ago
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0046 Catwalk Models Daisy

0046 Catwalk Models -- DaisyThe music slowly rose and the crowd silenced.Announcer: Welcome ladies and gentlemen. Don’t forget to drop your entry for the door prize in the box on the end of the runway at any time. The drawing with be made at the end of the show. The prize will be spectacular, I promise you.Polite clapping arose. The audience of about fifty adults was nearly all men with just a few women s**ttered about. The audience was sitting in chairs that lined the sides of the runway....

3 years ago
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My first time in Jamaica part onecoupleforfunnyc

Ok so of you read my previous stories you know about Darrel . Dave also knew about Darrel and wanted us to try swinging together . We booked an adults only resort in Jamaica because it's was one of the cheaper ones . As we arrive they are giving everyone drinks at the airport and the guy handed it to me and says your going to have fun here ! .I thank him and continue to our transportation to the hotel . We see a sign and we stand with the rest of the crowd but we realized everyone was a bit...

1 year ago
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SexyAndFunny

Sexy And Funny! Welcome to a place that’s full of laughs and full of wanks. The site SexyAndFunny.com focuses on both the funny and sexy as the name would suggest and tries to bring it to your screen as authentically as possible. Now, I don’t know about you, but I love me a bit of banter when it comes to sex. It helps keep things fresh. I’ve gone through so many women that I would certainly have gotten bored with sex if I didn’t use a little bit of humor here and there to spice things up.Want...

Popular Porn Blogs
1 year ago
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Pickle Juice

I strode up the walkway carrying my big satchel over my shoulder toward the front door of the next house. The sun shone bright and the temperature felt perfect to be out and about doing my job. I am a pickle juice salesman. Not a lot of people have heard of such a profession but you will soon enough. It will come to your city. The company is just starting out but we’re having great success. I rang the doorbell and waited patiently. In less that a minute I was rewarded with an open door. “Good...

3 years ago
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Catwalk Object

Catwalk ObjectTags: closet exhibitionism,   fully exposed pussy, audience participation, submissive, sucking, humiliation, emotion, being filmed, intense excitement, teasing, craving for cockA group of us had just graduated from Modelling and deportment school and this was our big night out to celebrate….As the ringleader of our group, I suggested to everyone on the day of our graduation ceremony that we hit the town that night, it was a Friday and I knew there were a group of clubs not far...

Exhibitionism
3 years ago
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On the Boardwalk

Ramsey spent most of his nights alone, he did not enjoy the company of others. It wasn't that he was unattractive, with dark hair and eyes, well toned muscles and olive colored skin. Ramsey was also very charismatic, Ramsey could convince almost anybody to like him, at least for a while. He had wet the bed until he was 11 years old, and regularly abused his younger brother. He was a diagnosed sociopath. Most nights, he laid awake for long periods of time thinking about the women he had lusted...

3 years ago
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Under The Boardwalk

It was a warm day in August, Kate and Lisa were at the boardwalk riding the rides.  They were in line to ride the flume.  They were talking to various people wasting time waiting for their turn.  Kate and Lisa were visiting Kate's grandparents in New Jersey.  The girls lived in Florida and would be leaving tomorrow.Eventually, it was their turn.  They entered the log and sat down.  Kate sat in front of Lisa.  They put their arms on the bars and got ready for their ride.  The ride started and it...

Straight Sex
2 years ago
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Naruto Time Loop

Naruto was surprised to wake up in his own bed, to say the least. He'd been sure that a sand ninja had turned the foundations to dust in the battle ye- Naruto shot upright. The battle! What had happened? Last he remembered, he'd been sprinting full tilt at the battle between Orochimaru and the old timer. A shimmering blue wall had flickered into existence in front of him, and sure that he could punch through such a flimsy barrier, Naruto had catapulted himself forward. Cut to waking up in his...

2 years ago
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Karma Loop

He woke up with a start, to birds squalling outside his window and sunlight crashing through the blinds. His body tingled with energy, and he felt – God, what was that in his crotch? He looked down and realized what the throbbing was. He had almost forgotten that feeling. He threw the covers off and jumped out of bed, bounding over to the mirror across the room. Was there a trace of black at his temples? He ran his fingers over his skull, and there seemed to be the beginning of a stubble, a...

3 years ago
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Time LoopChapter 2

SG was cold. She wore only a long brown woolen robe and sandals made of wood and rope. There were patches of snow on the ground, and she could see her breath when she exhaled. She sat on a flat stone at the top of a small rise, next to a stone and thatch hut. In the shallow valley below, a band of adults and children were struggling through the snow and mud. One of them looked up and saw her. The figure pointed to her, and soon about two dozen faces had been turned toward her. She could hear...

1 year ago
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Sleepwalking part 1

‘Sometimes I think about how odd it would be to catch a glimpse of the future, a quick view of events lying in store for us at some undisclosed date. Suppose we could peer through a tiny peephole in Time and chance upon a flash of what was coming up in the years ahead? Some moments we saw would make no sense at all and some, I suspect, would frighten us beyond endurance. If we knew what was looming, we’d avoid certain choices, select option B instead of A at the fork of the road.’ These words,...

Incest
3 years ago
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Down The Shore Under The Boardwalk

I sometimes get the notion into my head to take a drive down the shore and listen to music, walk along the beach and enjoy the sound and "feel" of the waves crashing on shore at high tide just about any time of the year. Well, with the temps today in the 50's I jumped at the chance since the roads were clear and traffic was minimal. I stopped at Starbucks, got myself a latte and put in a CD (the Black album..) and off I drove with the window down. Yup, I love being outdoors whenever I can.I...

1 year ago
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A Night On The Boardwalk

"Yo......so what are we doing for dinner before we head onto the boardwalk?" Carly walked into the room, where her and Kelsy were sharing at Kelsy's Aunt's house in Wildwood, NJ. She was wrapped in a fluffy white towel, just getting out of the shower after a nice warm afternoon of tanning on the beach. Kelsy's gaze from the tv moved to her best friend. "Well, I was thinking just dinner at that seafood restaurant right before the boardwalk on this street, what do you think?" Kels asked, watching...

Lesbian
3 years ago
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Looping

He sat next to me in Computer Science every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. The teacher would talk about loops and object oriented programming and all the while, half listening, he would be sitting next to me. Breathing. His presence was so entirely sexual, and I bet he didn’t even know it. I’d get out of class and just be wet. Oh, Seth. Fantasies and computer science became so inextricably tied in my mind that I’d get turned on just by reading the textbook. The sexual tension was so unbearable...

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