LoveHoney
- 1 year ago
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Love Honey! Are you still jerking your cock with your bare hand like a fucking caveman? Come on; the future is now. That’s like going out and buying some porno mags or DVDs from a sex shop. There are better ways to blow your load these days. And with all of the money you dumb fucks spend on bullshit stuff like expensive coffee and doujinshi, you could be having the goddamn fap sesh of a lifetime by just investing in a few toys. Yeah, chicks aren’t the only ones who can buy expensive fuck toys for a good time. And I’ve got a site today with a massive catalog of toys, lingerie, and much more.
Lovehoney.com is the sex shop of your dreams - it’s got a little bit of everything. You can find pocket pussies, prostate massagers, special lubes/condoms, lingerie, and so much more. But I’ll get into the nitty-gritty details of the catalog here in a little bit. What you fucks should know first is that this is one long-lasting site. It launched way way back in 1998. So, damn, this site is older than some of you horny bastards reading this. Besides, the site has only grown better over the years, with well over 2 million visitors coming their way every month.
Sex Toys for Everyone! Male Masturbators, Dildos, Foreplay Toys, and More!
The landing page has a ton of shit to check out. This is definitely one of the more streamlined online sex shops out there. Despite launching 20+ years ago, this site has a modern design that outclasses most of its competitors. Whatever the featured item, theme, or monthly special is, it can be found up top in a massive banner with custom art and all of that good stuff. Down below that huge banner, you’ll find a collage of boxes showcasing running deals, special items, advice guides, and coupons.
I recommend looking at all of these deals and options before using the other options at your disposal. You may just find a deal on something that you didn’t know you needed. And, hell, you’ll get a 15% coupon just for signing up for email alerts. That wouldn’t be a bad deal at all, especially if you were planning to buy something anyway.
Frequent Discounts and Deals on Premium Toys
Up top, you’ll have a good set of pages to check out. There are pages for “Sex Toys, Sexy Lingerie, Lubes & Better Sex, Bondage, Deals, Advice, and Trending Now.” Oh, and I should mention that you horny college students get a straight 20% off anything on the store with proof. Fuck yeah. And they said that college would never be worth it. You’ll make your money back in discounted sex toys in no time at all!
If you’re looking for something specific, you can always jump to the regular search bar to get a curated selection of toys or products. And if you hover your cursor over any of the header options, you’ll get a lengthy list of sub-categories for each one. For example, the sex toys section has what you’d expect. They’ve got vibrators, pocket pussies, couple’s toys, cock rings, anal toys, penis pumps, and complete kits. And, man, I love how this site presents each subsection. You get a preview image with a bright, colorful background. It’s just a neat way of doing things.
The lingerie section covers your basic shit like bras and panties for hot babes, but they’ve also got some kinky costumes and latex if that’s something you’re into. The lubes and better sex page has, well, lubes. But it also houses unique toys for couples, foreplay, sex games, and all sorts of sexual wellness related.
Bondage Sets, Advice Posts, Lingerie, and Outlet Discounts
As far as bondage gear goes, you’ve got a wealth of options. There are full bedroom kits, sex swings, spankers, restraints, gags, fetish clothing, and even electric shock toys to really spice up your bedroom. If you’re unsure how to get the most use out of these fetish toys, then you can read a quick breakdown of each option down below the product sections. Lovehoney makes sure that you horny bastards are informed every step of the way.
The advice page has columns and blog posts about bondage, lingerie, toys, and overall better sex. And, hey, some of you betas could probably use the help. Have you ever gone down on some bitch without knowing what you’re doing? Don’t worry; we’ve all been there. This site has guides that will ensure you give that slut the orgasm of her life. And the same is true for you babes reading this. There are guides for giving head so that the dude you’re blowing will never forget that night.
Affordable, High-Quality Sex Toys Shipped Discretely
The deals page is an excellent place to check for, well, deals. It’s not fucking rocket science. Lovehoney often has 50% of deals on certain sex toys, lingerie sets, and much more. You’re apt to find one hell of a discount if you just keep an eye on these pages. There will also be outlet deals upwards of 70% off and deals where you get a free toy if you buy something from a particular brand.
Plus, the prices here aren’t too bad. It is sure as hell is a lot cheaper than going to whatever sleazy, brick-and-mortar sex store that’s in your neighborhood. Listen, I get supporting local business. But these places charge obscene prices for some of the worse sex toys out there sometimes. At least with this site, you’re getting good shit that you can browse through without worrying about your friends and family seeing your car out front of a sex store.
Great Mobile Experience!
Better yet, you can take the kinky action with you on the go and browse through deals on your mobile device. This site works just as well on mobile browsers. I had no issues scrolling through the different sections and picking out hot toys to buy later. Hell, you can even get access to your site account if you want to reorder something or keep track of the delivery for a current purchase. After all, you don’t want your wife picking up the mysterious package and ruin the surprise, right?
ThePornDude’s Favorite Features
It doesn’t get much better than this when it comes to accessible, sexy toy shops. You don’t have to slink down to a local place and risk having your shame broadcast to the entire world. Instead, you can browse through thousands of kinky toys for men, women, couples, or whatever the people identify as these days. Long story short, if you’ve got a hole to shove a toy in or something to shove into a hole, then this site has got you covered.
You can find great deals on toys here that you may have never even heard about. This site definitely has one of the largest catalogs of options that I’ve seen. They even beat out some of the huge competitors in the market that bring in way more people every month. Besides, this site is so nice to browse. The design and everything about it are so fucking sleek.
ThePornDude’s Suggestions
This site did exactly what I expected it to do and then some. I don’t think I have any bad shit to say about this online sex shop. It’s got unique toys, an extensive catalog, a blog, and a solid site design. You won’t get this premium of an experience just anywhere. My only suggestion is that you horny bastards check this site out and treat yourselves to a damn-good orgasm. Get yourself a pulsating, warming fuck sleeve and just sit back and let that shit do its work. Trust me; you betas will love it.
ThePornDude’s Final Thoughts
Overall, Lovehoney.com is a must-visit site if you’re in the market for a sex toy as a dude, chick, or couple. This site has some crazy-good deals on premium toys that you won’t find anywhere else for this cheap. It’s got a little bit of everything for all of you kinky motherfuckers. Whether you’ve got a sexy girlfriend who wants to get down and dirty, or you’re just flying solo, this site has loads of great products worth checking out. I highly recommend you horny fappers check it out.
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There was an old World Book Encyclopedia with lots of pictures, so the teens spent the morning flipping through it with Ai. The creature was fascinated by not just the objects and places, but the people. Humans were so different! One page had a photo of an African man with skin almost pure black. Ai held up her arm next to the book, looking back and forth and comparing the colors. Was she human? There didn't seem to be a color humans didn't come in! After about an hour, Bill stood. "I...
A Stalker Vs Serial Killers: Dawn Breakers Chapter 3 Part 3 Reconnection. ~Lily~ It took some fast talking for Rachel to convince Lily to come home with Teddy. The girl refused to be under the same roof as the man who had insulted the man her hero. That was something that her mother may be able to accept, but Lily blatantly refused to even consider the possibility. It wasn’t until her mother agreed that she would ask Matt to apologize that Lily agreed to return home. When they walked...
THE VOLUPTUOUS COCK RECEPTICLE: Bob looked out through the front window of his home and watched his wife, Vicky, guide her luxury sports car up the long circular driveway and park it just past the front door. When the Jag stopped she got out and he watched her preposterously well built body undulate around the rear of the vehicle and start towards the front door, swaying provocatively on her 5 inch, stiletto heeled boots. It was a prick hardening sight to see. She was...
It all started one night a few years back, when my friend was at our house playing cards with us. Just your normal card game, not strip poker or anything like that. As it was a hot night, and we had no air conditioning, my wife was wearing a pair of silk pajamas. These were a button down top, with a pair of shorts for the bottom half. My wife has blonde hair and, at that time, 36C tits, and a sweet ass that got plenty of looks from guys. As we were playing cards, I accidently slid one of her...
ExhibitionismI came down in my boxers. The heat was killing me. The night before, trying some open talk with mom had given me a boner the whole night. So is the morning with my morning wood, making a tent in my boxer. I started to get more comfortable with my mom. By now, I didn’t even care If I had a hard-on anymore. She has seen me cum in front of her after all. I went into the kitchen. My mom was there reading the news while sipping her morning tea. She was wearing shorts this morning, with a tight black...
IncestDown in the basement of my mistress' house, it was dark and secluded. One door, with one key around my mistress' neck.I was told to go in, remove my clothing, lie down on the table and wait...I waited for over fifteen minutes. In that time, my mind thought back to previous encounters with my mistress. She would sometimes call me at stupid times of the morning, like two and three o'clock. Once, she even woke me at five o'clock in the morning, just to go to her house, and lick and please her...
BDSM“ ... I’m begging you!” Rufer pleaded. ‘What a sorrowful situation... ‘ Zax inwardly could not help by sympathize. He recalled how much he had been through to fulfill the terms of his own inheritance and yet still had a seemingly bottomless chasm to cross. “The Star Scavenger’s missions are for the benefits of all Kingdom Earth and even our brethren from Valgarel. I can’t trade it to satisfy the whim of a single person”. He harshly stated. A glint of hope instantly lit in Rufer’s pupils as...
Well, to start, this isn’t really the most exciting story, but this is the way it happened. My name is Sam, and my wife’s name is Joni. We are in our early 40’s and have been together for about 19 years. Joni’s younger sister Beth had been trying to have a baby with her husband Jeff for about 3 years with no success. They went and got checked out, and she was barren, unable to have a baby. Beth asked Joni if she would have a baby for them. Me and Joni talked about it; she said that she...