Lifeboat Introduction
- 4 years ago
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Evenicle free porn video
Every time I’m forced to talk about this goddamn game, I start to convulse. Congratulations, you rat fucks – you managed to find the one porn game that actually makes me uncomfortable by being that depraved. And no, it’s not because there are extreme scenes in it. And no, I don’t mind the violence. Look, if I’m honest, I’ve seen significantly worse shit out there among all kinds of porn games that deal with torture, violence and all kinds of fucked up behavior. I’d like to think that the whole point of Evenicle is that it strings you along with charm and innocence, to the point that you start to forget that you’re playing an adult game. Then, when your guard’s down, it bombards you with fucked up shit and it’s kind of like your inner child dies more and more with each cutscene.
That being said, my inner child died a very long time ago when I discovered videos of Japanese women having live eels shoved into their anuses, so I don’t have much to lose. Let’s talk about Evenicle. If you don’t mind, I’ll start from the top. I kind of jumped into the action there, because I’ve still got gore and extreme scenes on the brain.
It’s Extremely Japanese
Evenicle ticks every single box on the long list of expectable Japanese video game tropes. You’ve got your generic hentai protagonist who is a random dude with an average build, a giant cock and a dream to fuck virgin pussy. Also, he’s got two sisters who look like they might be underage, but they most certainly are not. He wants to fuck them. In fact, it’s his goal in life to fuck them.
He’s forgettable, but likable. He’s charming, but he doesn’t really stand out. Women don’t think much of him when they first meet him, but they find him irresistible after they get to know him. This is cookie-cutter Japanese protagonist writing. At the very least, the game doesn’t take place in a school.
I’m kind of sick and tired of these tropes, as well as the generic way that they write the babes in these stories. Don’t get me wrong, I love submissive bitches who put up a front first, then cave and beg for cock after, but it gets old after the 100th time you’ve seen it in a new porn game. That being said, there are enough original concepts in Evenicle to keep things fresh. The characters are generic and so is the art, but the production quality is high and the world is … fucked up beyond all recognition.
A Magical World of Cock Slaves
I haven’t played Evenicle in a few months, so this is kind of a blur for me at this point, but I’ll give you the bullet points. The world of Evenicle was created by a benevolent goddess who cares about human beings and wants to see them grow up healthy and happy. This is why she breathes down their necks with extremely authoritarian rules on how they’re allowed to use their cocks and pussies. She will straight up curse anyone and everyone who has sex outside of marriage. There’s no way to escape this curse. If you have sex with anyone other than your husband or wife, you’re fucked.
There are some exceptions, though. The goddess was kind enough to add in a fine print that allows men to have as many wives as they want, thus granting them access to a ridiculous amount of guaranteed pussy. But, they have to become holy knights that serve and protect the people. That’s exactly why the protagonist of Evenicle wants to become a knight. With every rank that he gains as a knight, he’s allowed one more wife. That’s just how the system works. Ideally, he aims to become the greatest knight who ever lived so he can entice his hot sisters into marrying him.
Let’s not overlook the fact that you get a free anti-cheat system built into these batshit rules. You can bang all your wives, but your wives can only bang you. If they bang anyone else, they get cursed. I do wonder if the goddess said anything about having orgies with your wives, though. Like, how does that work? If their pussies rub together, does that count as cheating? Technically, your wives aren’t married to each other. I don’t fucking know. Well, don’t overthink it, since it’s a porn game.
The Slut Shaming Curse
So you might be wondering what actually happens to the sluts who have sex outside of wedlock. Well, a black ring appears around one of their appendages, usually around one of their fingers. The ring cannot be removed. It’s magical. You could sever the whole damn finger if you want; it’ll just grow back elsewhere. There is no escape from the curse. The entire world will always know that you are a slut and this will never change. That’s a hell of a depressing fate. Luckily, our boy is smart enough to marry chicks before he bangs them.
The ring isn’t just there for decoration, though. There are some serious downsides to being cursed for life. Everywhere you go, life around you suffers. You cannot grow any crops; you cannot keep pets as they will die and the general wellbeing of those around you will take a serious dip if they don’t kick you the fuck out of town. That’s exactly why all accursed individuals get shunned by their friends and family and by society in general. They’re free to live, if they want to, but they have to go do that elsewhere. They’re not allowed anywhere near the pure of heart.
You might be blown away already, but wait; there’s always more. I straight up haven’t told you the best part of the rules. If you’re a chick and you get fucked, that still counts as cheating and you still get cursed. So, let’s say that you’re a woman, just minding your own business and a bunch of horny-ass bandits stroll through your village and decide to run a train on your holes. Just like that, your life is over. They’ll let you live, for sure, but you will never be allowed to see your loved ones ever again. You see, it’s this kind of sad, depressing shit that kind of feels out of place in a video game that’s supposed to be getting me off. Maybe if you’re a sadist, you’ll get a hell of a kick out of this kind of crap, but watching people suffer an existential meltdown isn’t really my cup of tea. Maybe I’ve gone soft, who knows?
Journey to Knighthood
That’s about 90% of the premise to this game. The rest is little irrelevant tidbits that you can discover on your own. All that’s left is the actual gameplay. Well, it’s damn good, for a turn-based JRPG. It’s a bit worse than say, the new Final Fantasy games, but it still holds up pretty darn well for a porn game. Most of the game is in proper 3D in high resolutions with a cute art style and a ton of well put together effects and visuals. It’s a great looking game.
The in-between is littered with two-dimensional cutscenes that are… visual novel themed. Yay… You know how much I love those. That was sarcasm. It’s hard to convey sarcasm in writing. I hate visual novels. They drone on for far too long before I get to see some titties. Well, this game doesn’t have that problem, but it still managed to delay the titties. For that purpose, it uses combat.
You’re going to be killing a lot of random critters around the world of Evenicle in order to level up your character, get some gold, buy new items and better prepare yourself to … kill more random critters. It’s an endless loop that works well for non-pornographic games, because we play those in order to make ourselves feel powerful. Personally, I play porn games to bust a load into a cum sock and move on with my day.
It’s Pretty Damn Fapworthy
Even with all the delays, the long story, the arduous questlines and all the goddamn monster fighting, there’s still a ton of high-quality pussy in this game. I counted dozens if not hundreds of high-quality sexual encounters. All this shit was high-quality hentai art that you could easily jack off to. It’s uncensored and there’s so much variety. There’s romantic vaginal sex, hardcore anal and even extreme XXX scenes. This game is pretty fucking wild.
I’d still suggest that you check out a gameplay video to see if the actual core mechanics look like something you’d enjoy. The game is pretty damn pricey, so I wouldn’t advise that you just buy it to see what it’s like. If you’re not into JRPG porn games, you won’t enjoy it. Then, there’s also the fact that you need to be able to sit through some pretty violent XXX scenes if you want to get through the whole game. Good luck.
Geraldine
- 07.03.2023
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