WeFuckBlackGirls Jenna Foxx Third Appearance
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Vintage Tube XXX! We’re going retro, boys and girls. Long before the internet came in and changed the game, we had to fap to actual VHS tape videos that maxed out at a dogshit resolution that you’ve never even heard of. They were more messy and blurry than modern 240p videos. That should tell you everything you need to know about the quality. But, there was still a lot of charm in porn back then. The biggest challenge was the actual making of the porn and the distribution. The world frowned upon the pornographic industry. It wasn’t easy to make smut back then.
The simple act of showing a blowjob on camera was considered a severely immoral act reserved for the most depraved perverts. These days an average 18-year-old has consumed more pornography by his 19th birthday than the entire compendium of smut until 1999. We’re living in the digital age. Back then, people lived in the stone age of smut. You had to physically purchase a VHS tape, go back to your house, wait for your parents to go to bed, then pop that bad boy into the video player and try your best to hear the smut. It was hard. The videotape whirred louder than the moans on screen, and you couldn’t afford to blast that shit any louder from fear of being heard by your neighbors.
Retro Smut Was Weird
That still wasn’t even the worst of it. The actual smut was so painfully vanilla that I struggle to pop a boner watching it today. I’m desensitized. If a chick isn’t actively spreading her asshole open with several toys at a time, I don’t even bother to wake my dick up. I’m a man of sophisticated tastes. Back in the 70s and 80s, porn mainly was about story and intricate man-on-woman interactions that kind of felt like watching your actual literal parents conceiving your sorry ass on their honeymoon. What I’m saying is, it wasn’t hot, and it was realistic. Realism ruins smut faster than lack of consent.
But, we’re in the future now, and nostalgia is very much a powerful aphrodisiac. When you’ve jerked off to every camwhore that’s come out in the past 10 years, you might get complacent. You might get a taste for the simpler days when vaginas looked like the great Amazon before modern deforestation gave it tree alopecia. Vaginas were bushy. That’s the joke. I don’t know how razor companies managed to stay solvent back then. As far as I can tell, no-one shaved anything. To find the clitoris on a 70s porn vagina, you need a large dedicated team of excavators and several high-powered flashlights. Don’t forget to pack provisions.
Let’s Go Back to Basics
Nostalgia can be sexy, and VintageTube is here to profit from that concept. I don’t think I’ve ever gone this long into a review without mentioning the actual site I’m reviewing, but I’ll be damned if retro porn doesn’t bring out the poet in me. This shit gets me really creative and teary-eyed every time. It’s endearing to see how far we’ve come. All right, let’s talk about VintageTube. This site is loaded to the brim with thousands of classical porn movies from the olden days. Most of these are older than your mom. Most of them also have more cocks in them than your mom on an average Friday night. Back in the 70s and 80s, porn producers were too shy to admit that the whole point of porn is to get dudes to feast their eyes on chicks. So, instead, they made long-form movies with actual stories. That’s what you get on VintageTube.
Many of these videos have the boring bits edited out, but most of them are pretty much just transferred over into digital form straight from their VHS origins. That means that you get around 20 to 30 minutes of actual fucking for every hour-long smut movie on this site. The rest of it is the plot. I hate plot. Back then, regular movies were boring as hell. You can only imagine the quality of the writing inside actual pornography. This is where plumber jokes were born. A pipe bursts, a housewife calls a plumber, the plumber arrives, and by the time he’s balls deep inside her vagina, you’ve wasted 20 years of your life.
A Very Popular Site
Maybe I’m a bit too young for this demographic, or I’m just not nostalgic enough. Maybe VintageTube is trying to appeal to the boomers in the audience. We may never know. What I do know is that this site is doing something right, for sure. I can tell that they’re successful. They’re constantly adding new smut on their site, and these videos aren’t exactly cheap to host. They aren’t embedded from a third-party source, as far as I can tell. You’re watching the OG Ron Jeremy collections straight from VintageTube’s domain.
VintageTube is an absolute bottomless pit of ancient pornography. You could straight up use this site for your next history paper, in case you need references. And speaking of history, there are quite a few videos here that make the 70s look like the modern-day. That’s right – VintageTube has a bunch of black and white smut videos from the 1920s. At least, I’m guessing it’s the 1920s from the style. A lot of them are compilations of photographs, but either way, you get to see what sex looked like long before your grandparents were born. I’ll give you a teaser: It wasn’t sexy. This shit seems like something you’d catch at 4 am on National Geographic. Still, it’s an essential part of history, and some people like to jerk off to it, so by all means, dive right in.
It’s a Decent Site
Design-wise, I have no gripes with VintageTube. It’s an adequately styled site with a great video player that is responsive and quick. I never had to wait for videos to load, and I could skip through them with ease. I could also tell that the videos weren’t further compressed from the original sources. I watched them in the highest available resolution. So, credit where credit is due – VintageTube is a very well-designed site. The categories on the side are also quite welcome; even though I think it’s a lot more fun to just dive into the videos at random, I also liked seeing what the all-time most viewed videos were. I like getting into the mind of nostalgic fappers.
On the other side of the coin, this site has a bit too many ads. The ads on the main page aren’t a problem at all. They stay within their lane, far from the actual video thumbnails. There are also ads on the video player’s side when you dive in, and those are also not too intrusive. However, ads that roll on top of the actual videos are a bit of a fucking headache. I could have done without them. The site is still pretty enjoyable without any ad-block, but they’re just about pushing the limits on the number of ads you can have before giving your viewers a stroke. At the very least, there are no ads in the middle of the videos. Once the smut starts, the ads fuck off. You don’t get interrupted.
Cultural Exchange
The best part of VintageTube has to be foreign videos because they’re both ancient and from random-ass European countries. This means that you’re not just jumping back through time; you’re also jumping across continental lines. It feels like sexual time traveling. Haven’t you ever wondered what sex was like in 1960s France? Well, now you can find out. Dive into some ancient French pussy on VintageTube. You won’t regret it. Well, unless you hate hairy vaginas.
Hell, if I had one recommendation for this site, they should add a switch that hides all the videos that contain overly hairy vaginas, but that’s just me. The foreign videos make this site a fucking goldmine. The Italian stuff especially is fucking good. It’s unique and eccentric, and it features some raw scenes that put modern pornography to shame. They even went out of their way to include some original Rocco Siffredi videos. Now that’s thorough smut history.
If you want to jump back in time with your cock in your hands and see some ancient pussy, by all means, check out VintageTube. You’ll find what you’re looking for. And, if you accidentally manage to run into a smut video featuring your mother, well, I’m sorry, that’s on you. You knew the risks: happy retro fapping, my dudes.
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Introduction: a boy has a new look on life again. Darling Part two Darling, Darling its time to wake up the voice was soft and distant. I turned my head in the sounds direction and opened my eyes. Rose was staring me in the face not 4 inches away. I was about to say something when she put her finger to her lips and then pointed at my chest. There was Cassie with her head just poking out from under the comforter. She was purring softly and other then her cat ears twitching, she was sound asleep....
Author’s Note: This is the first story I’ve posted to Literotica and, for some reason that defies all of my intuitive reasoning, I have decided to lead with a non-erotic story. Oh well! This one turned out differently than I had planned when I sat down to write it, and didn’t exactly work out with the ending I originally wanted. To that end, I think the ending may end be found to be too ‘out-of-left-field’. If you feel like braving a somewhat choppy story though, please do! I hope you enjoy...
Day Forty-three - Monday Sue and I woke at the exact same moment, opening our eyes to look into each other's. She smiled so gently, so sweetly at me that my heart melted. Kissing was the only appropriate response. We did, we kissed and kissed until we had to do more. We did more, so much more, that we didn't finish with the shower until six-fifteen. Good thing the coffee maker works fast. As soon as we turned on the light to plug in the other coffee maker on the bar, Tiny and Ruth came...
ChangesKatie: Beginnings By Lacey_Katie My cousin Lisa met me at the airport. She reminded me of Nicole Kidman, just not quite as tall and as pencil-thin. Lisa was, and is, a natural redhead, 26 years old, and she wore a royal blue blazer, matching skirt which reached her mid-thigh, and navy stockings. She highlighted that with small gold earrings and a matching bracelet. She was 5'8" tall, around 125 pounds which made a great figure. I later learned it was 36D, 24, 36. Lisa...
Amy 29: Amy's Big Night Copyright 2015 by Amy Komori The original characters and plot of this story are the property of the author. No infringement of pre-existing copyright is intended. This story is copyright (c) 2015 Amy Komori. All rights reserved. Chapter One: I Say I Will Not The night of the show, Sarah ruled the Mixer with her soulful voice but it was just too bad hardly anyone was there. Even though we all knew in advance it was going to be slack weekend because it was...
This is a work of fiction… I turned the envelope over and over in my hand. Should I open it? I re-read the writing in the front of the envelope. ‘To Susie Mason. I’m Waiting.’ The letter I had been waiting for. I put my nerves aside and slowly peeled the envelop open. The smell of lavender wafted out of it, almost making my eyes water. Cautiously I opened out the letter. The writing was scrolled and difficult to read but my eyes soon adjusted to the change of fonts: ‘My dearest Susie, I...
I was sitting in the back seat wearing a tiny little skirt, and a skin tight, white, spaghetti strap, thin, white tank top. I was amazed that mom let me wear it. I guess she thought it was no big deal because, after all, we were headed to the beach. After about 30 minutes on the road I started entertaining myself by pulling my skirt up and showing my panties to truck drivers as we passed by them. I'm glad I didn't cause a wreck, and I knew it was probably not the smartest thing in the...