Rebecca's Story Part 7 free porn video

Rebecca's Story Chapter seven I woke up with a start to the alarm clock bell making an uneven loud trill which was pretty annoying, I fumbled trying to find it until I eventually managed to find the little lever to shut it up. I lay there for a few moments to allow myself to gather my thoughts. The sun was shining, and the birds were singing their hearts out, I threw the cover back and spun around to lower my legs over the side of the bed. The linoleum on the floor was cold, I made a mental note to get myself some slippers and change the dressing gown I had bought which was the wrong size, I pulled my cardigan over my nightie grabbed my toiletries and opened the door to see if anyone was about. I heard various sounds of people moving about but I couldn't see anyone actually in the hallway, the nearest bathroom door was open, so I quietly shut my door and headed towards it. I grabbed a couple of clean towels from the rack went into the bathroom and locked the door behind me, I got my usual morning routine out of the way and then showered and washed myself thoroughly, I ran my hands up my legs and checked my underarms, but I was still smooth. Lastly, I washed and conditioned my hair, turned the shower off got out and dried myself, after wrapping my hair up and the other towel around my body I gathered my stuff and ran back to my room. I sat in front of my dressing table and dried and styed my hair as best I could without the curling tongues they used in the hairdressers, another thing I needed to add to my list. Once I had got my hair somewhere near, I held it back away from my face with my scrunchie and started putting my face on, I spent a lot longer on my make up today, I really wanted to create a good impression for my interview. To finalise my look, I added a couple of layers of lip sealing gloss I had bought years ago but had only used once before. Once I had applied another layer of mascara, I looked at my reflection in the mirror. A now familiar face stared back at me, this was the female me, this was the way I would look every day. I put my gold dangly crucifix earring in and my gold necklace, I pouted in the mirror I felt totally believable, I let my hair back down and gave it another brush, I was really happy with the way I looked. I stood up moisturised avoiding the areas where I had to stick myself away, and then sprayed deodorant on, adding a couple of squirts of mums perfume on my neck and the tops of my legs. I then went to work tucking myself away, I thoroughly dried my skin with the hair drier and then spent a lot of time getting it perfect, I pushed my testicles back up inside myself and then taped my scrotum flat to my body. I then forced my penis back up into my body folded the skin tightly across and stuck it in place. I left just the tip of it free to allow me to take a pee, just to be safe I added a little bit more to secure firmly away. I did feel a little uncomfortable, but it was something that needed doing, I checked myself in the mirror pleased I was quite flat, and I hadn't even put my knickers on yet. I moved about the room to allow my skin to stretch out and for the tight pulling feeling to subside, gradually my bits settled into their new position, I thought to myself, they would have to get used to it because it was the new normal. I talced over my now flattened area to stop any of the adhesive marking my underwear and then picked up my new knickers, they were nothing fancy just plain black bikini style knickers with fine elasticated lace to the waist and legs and a little bow in the middle of the waist, they were stretchy and light. As I slid them up my legs goosebumps appeared and a shiver ran through my body, there was nothing like putting clean knickers on after you had showered it was a wonderful feeling. I picked up my bra and slipped my arms in the straps and fastened it behind me, after pulling my tiny boobs and some skin into the cups and adjusting the straps I had visible breasts, they weren't anything to write home about, but they were there, and they were mine. I looked in the mirror pleased to see how flat my front had become I looked pretty convincing with my knickers on and no sticking plaster visible. I stepped into my skirt and pulled it up me until it was around my waist, I had bought size ten without really knowing my correct size at the time, thankfully Tiffany had been right it fitted perfectly, I picked up my peach cap sleeved top unbuttoned it and slipped it over my head. The waist was elasticated with a little frill that sat over the waistband of my skirt, I straightened it out and checked myself in the mirror, I couldn't help but smile I loved the outfit the skirt and top went together perfectly. I put my wedges on stood up straightened my skirt and let out a long sigh, I felt so complete, I felt so wonderful but most of all, I felt feminine. I checked the time it was a quarter to eight, I quickly made my bed and tidied my room, I nipped into the hallway and put my damp towels in the wash cart. I popped two birth control pills in my mouth and swallowed them, mental note to self, get something to drink that I could keep in my room. I put my perfume, lippy, mascara and the lip gloss sealer in my handbag, cursing myself for forgetting to sort out my new purse. I gave myself another quick squirt of perfume on my neck, took a final check in the mirror, put my bag over my shoulder and threaded my cardigan through and over it and left my room. I locked the door and slipped the key into my bag, and headed to Sarah room, I was nearly there when I saw Marion walking up the hallway towards me. We met outside Sarah's door, both of us smiled simultaneously "Morning Marion I said everything okay?" She nodded at me and looked me up and down "wow someone is out to make a good impression, you look fantastic, a very good morning to you" she pointed to Sarah's door and looked at me. "are we both here to see that our little angel gets to school"? she asked me. I nodded. "excellent I've got a million other things that need doing, thanks Becky, I'll catch up with you later, oh and good luck with the interview." With that she disappeared back down the stairs, I heard Sarah door unlock and it started to open. Sarah must have heard us talking right outside her door as her sleepy little face appeared as she opened the door, she had obviously still been asleep as she walked back inside rubbing her eyes. I shut the door behind us. "morning Sarah, it's a beautiful day and we need to get a move on if we want time to have some breakfast before we go," she sat on the bed and pulled her usual pouting face. "I don't want to go to school I want to be with you." I smiled at her. "we will be together tonight, but today I have my interview remember, and I don't want to be late so get moving." I felt this was the best time to grab and her and tickle her sides, she screamed out now fully awake. "Go and have a quick shower and clean your teeth, I'll make your bed and then you can get dressed and I'll dry your hair for you, come on chop- chop"! I patted her back and directed her towards the door, she went off to the bathroom while I tidied up her discarded clothes from yesterday, I tidied her room and made her bed. I went through her drawers and found a vest and a clean pair of knickers for her, luckily, she had hung her school uniform up. thankfully, I didn't have to go and get her from the bathroom she returned looking very wet wrapped in a towel, making sure the towel stayed wrapped around her, I helped her dry herself and then held her knickers out for her to step into, all of the time making sure that I looked at the floor until she had got them on. Once she had them on, I helped her straighten them out and then slipped her vest over her head. Once she was decent, I gently rubbed her hair almost dry with the towel, and then went and then put it in the dirty towel wash cart in the hallway. By the time I had returned to her room she had her blouse and skirt on and was just pulling her socks on. "You look nice Becky, and you smell nice too" I looked at her and gave a big smile "why thank you Sarah that's very nice of you to say that, and you my princess, look as lovely as ever." I guided her over to her dressing table where I dried her hair properly with her hair dryer, I brushed it as I worked and then put it in a ponytail for her, I patted her on the head "there you go all done" she stood up, I helped her straighten her clothing, she then gathered her school bag, and we made our way downstairs. We said hello to Dorreen had a quick breakfast and headed out to the bus pick up point, we just made it as the bus pulled in just as we joined the small queue. After waving goodbye to her and her second-best friend Amy, I stood on the steps enjoying the warmth from the autumn sun, I was just going to go back in when Bill came out, he smiled at me as he put his sunglasses on. "Good morning, Becky, you're looking rather dapper today, Marion tells me you've got an interview this morning, I wish you well" he grinned, and I grinned back, he was a lovely man. "thank you Bill, it's a lovely morning and I'm feeling quite positive and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I get a good result." "What time is you're interview"? he asked, I told him it was ten thirty he shrugged his shoulders. "that's a shame I've got to go into town today, but the laundry's not ready until after two, too late for you I'm afraid, anyway good luck" he patted me on the shoulder and wandered off in the direction of the garages. I looked at my watch it was now five to nine, I wasn't sure if the buses run every half hour or every hour, so I decided just to be safe I would start making tracks. I quickly popped into the downstairs bathroom and had a pee and then checked myself in the mirror. Happy I still looked okay I started walking towards the bus stop at the end of the drive, I was glad I had decided to leave straight away as I had forgot just how long the drive was. I looked for the stop opposite to the one I usually got off of, I spotted it, so I crossed the road and walked about two hundred yards up the road to it and looked at the timetable it said the next bus was at nine thirty, that was only ten minutes, there was no seats, so I just stood and waited. The bus journey was uneventful, it was a different driver to the usual one, but he seemed nice, and gave me a wink as I paid my fare. There weren't many people on the bus, so I sat by the window and enjoyed seeing all of the different places we passed, it took a lot longer than Rob did in his jeep! The bus stop was in a different place to when I last caught it to go home, so I had to get my bearings, after walking for a couple of minutes I realised I had got off a stop to early, I saw a sign that said town centre, so I headed in that direction. After walking for ten or so minutes I spotted the factory outlet shop that sold the catalogue returns, I reckoned if I hung a left at the next alley, it would take me down onto the high street, I did that and started to see familiar shops, and then to my horror I saw the big electrical outlet where that guy Matty had said he worked, It was right opposite the boutique, no wonder he had seen me in the window. I walked past keeping my head down, as I got the entrance, I pretended to be looking in my bag, thankfully I got past without hearing any shouts or calls. I got to the end of the alley and turned left following it back down to the high street, I started looking for the florists, I got the piece of paper out of my purse that Marion had given me to read it, Blossoms and Blooms the high street, but it didn't give a number, I didn't know how long the high street was but I hoped it wasn't too long as it was now ten o'clock and I didn't want to be late. I carried on walking looking down both sides of the street, there was no sign of it, what if I should be walking the in the other direction? the street I came down might be right in the middle a of mile long street. I stopped and looked up the opposite direction, there was no sign of it, I decided to go back the way I had come and ask Tiffany, she would know. I walked back up and around the corner into the alley, and made my way into the boutique, there was no sign of Tiffany anywhere the counter was piled with garments and the shop looked deserted, shit, I thought, ten past ten, my heart started pounding I accepted that I was probably wasn't going to make it. I walked back out of the boutique and in desperation walked into the electrical outlet shop, it was huge, I tried to see Matty, it was a big shop and there were signs hanging down which obstructed my view. I was feeling a bit frantic when I spotted him behind a desk that said Home & Mobile Communications, right over the other side of the shop. I wanted to run over to it but didn't want to draw attention to myself so I walked quickly hoping he would still be there when I got there. By the time I arrived at the counter he was smiling at me, having spotted me long before I got to him, I gave him a smile and showed him the piece of paper. "Hi Matty, please help me I've got to get to this place in the next twenty minutes but I can't find it" I nearly threw the paper at him, he laughed and said "Good morning Rebecca I'm very well thank you, or am I allowed to call you Becky, it's me Matty remember me, we sat next to each other on the bus." I nodded feeling embarrassed at my rudeness, I gave him a pensive smile, how could I forget him with those big blue eyes, he seemed to realise that I wasn't there to see him, I just need directions, he looked down at the piece of paper and shook his head. I know where these guys are, they are on the north end of the high street as you go out of town, it's a good thirty-minute walk from here, when you leave the shop, you will need to turn left and then walk all the way to the end and turn left again you will know when you've gone far enough as you'll see McDonalds on the corner. Just turn left past Mcdonalds until you are back on the high street and then follow it up for a quarter of a mile, they are on the right by the fire station. My heart sunk and my mood immediately changed to one of despair, there was no way I would get the job if I was half an hour late for my interview. I looked up at him, my eyes beginning to become wet, he held my piece of paper out for me to take, giving me an apologetic smile, I thanked him for his help and started to walk away, there was no point in bothering now, I had blown it. "Stop! Hang on, I've got an idea, wait here" he ordered me, he sounded confident, my mood immediately lifted as a glimmer of hope shot through me. He had moved to the other end of his counter and was waiting for the phone to be answered, he starting speaking to someone, I couldn't hear what was being said, I wondered if he was on the phone to the florists, but I wasn't sure. He slammed the phone down and came around to the front of the counter and took my arm. "quickly follow me and don't get lost" he said as we started to head towards a door that said warehouse. Not really sure of what I had got myself into, I followed him through the door and to a lift. "We will need to go down to the main loading bay and cut along the lorry stations, so keep close to me as its very dangerous and if you got hurt, I would never forgive myself, and it would probably get me the sack"! I tried to make sure that I stuck to him like glue, I didn't like the sound of any of it, but it was my only hope, try as I did, I couldn't keep up with him in my tight skirt and wedges, he kept looking around to see why I wasn't moving as fast as he was, he did eventually realise as he said. "sorry Becky, I wasn't thinking" he held his hand out and I gratefully took it, and he slowed down a bit. We went through dark corridors and storerooms, the temperature dropped, my legs and arms felt really cold, eventually we walked out into the lorry stations. It was quite dark down there, there were huge lorries and delivery vans everywhere, some were reversing up really close to the concrete platform we were walking along. The noise was deafening, and the smell of diesel was awful, I held my breath trying not to breathe the heavy fumes in. Thankfully once we got past that bit the air was a bit fresher although it was still quite dark, Matty stopped and seemed to thinking, I wondered if we were lost. I looked over the edge of the concrete walkway to see a five- or six-foot drop, so I stepped back, he turned and looked at me. "I'm going to jump down and then I will help you down, you have to trust me, if we follow this along to the main lifts you will be late this is the only chance you have"! I wasn't at all comfortable with this situation, but I realised it was all of my own making, and he was going out of his way to help me, I had little choice, I was about to shout back at him that I was okay with it, but he had disappeared. I turned to see him looking up at me. "sit on the edge, I'll lift you down"! he shouted, I was shaking with both the cold and fear, I felt like crying and stood there frozen feeling stupid. "Come on you can do it" he shouted, holding his arms up to reach out to me, I knew I needed to do something, so I carefully and as ladylike as possible sat down on the edge, before I knew it, he had put his hands around my waist and lifted me down like I was nothing. I fell into him more with relief than anything else, he gave me a quick squeeze and then took my hand and led me up two flights of concrete stairs and out into the warm sunshine, opposite us on the other side of the road was a sign, it said Blossoms and Blooms. I felt like crying, he was my savour, I looked at my watch twenty-seven minutes past ten, he had got me here, I looked up to him to thank him. "Matty you're my hero, I just don't know how to thank you," he smiled at me "how about lunch," he said as he leant down to look into my face. And then from everything being good I ruined it all, I don't know what on earth came over me as I leant forward stood on tip toes and kissed him lightly on his lips. As soon as I realised what I was doing I pulled away. "sorry, I'm sorry" I whispered feeling totally embarrassed. I quickly turned and crossed the road, no goodbyes, no backward glances nothing, I replayed the whole scene in my head as I was sitting waiting in the office of the florists. I couldn't believe just how rude I had been, stupid, selfish, and brainless, was the only thing I could think to call myself. When I had entered the florists, I was surprised how small it was, there was a counter towards the left-hand side of a room and then there was a small area in front of an open fire where people could be seated, I guessed they sat there to look at the catalogues and choose what arrangements they wanted. As I looked around, I realised that this was just a converted house, one of them old properties that rich people used to own. I had been shown into the back of the building to an office by Julie who I had spoken to on the phone yesterday, she was around twentyish and very pretty with long blonde hair and piercing green eyes, she wore a tight pair of black jeans, trainers and a taupe spaghetti strapped top that showed off her ample breasts. She was very bubbly and friendly, when I first approached her to introduce myself, she grinned at me as thought we shared a secret or she felt she knew me, I gave her a quizzical look and she winked "hunky boyfriend" she said, as she motioned to where Matty and I had parted. I felt myself go red and then flush with embarrassment, she had obviously seen us stood across the road and had seen my stupid behaviour, I just nodded and pretended to go to my bag. She showed me through the shop to a small office were I was sat waiting to be interviewed by Mandy, the shop manager. My head was in no place to go through an interview, all I could think of was what I had just done, what was the matter with me, why had I done that, now he expects to see me again, I had possibly caused irreparable damage to me being able to keep my true identity a secret. I was still cursing myself when Mandy came in and introduced herself. "Hi Rebecca, I'm Mandy" she held her hand out and we lightly shook hands. "sorry to keep you waiting, as you are aware we are a little bit understaffed at the moment, so this is going to be a fairly quick interview I'm afraid. She gave me a broad smile and carried on speaking. "as I said on the phone, we are looking for two new part time members of staff, you're the first potential recruit that's contacted us so please tell me a little about yourself." She sat herself down behind the desk, I felt drained and on the verge of tears over the Matty thing, my emotions were somersaulting. I knew it was pretty pointless lying to her, so I told her that I had very little retail experience, apart from a short stint at the Co-op, going on to explain about my current predicament, with currently no idea where my parents were, and I no longer had a family home to go back to, so it was thanks Marion and the people at the home giving me a roof above my head that I could make a fresh start. She nodded and listened and only interrupted me to say. "you're shaking, do you fancy a cup of coffee or something"? I did actually as my mouth was dry, and I was feeling completely drained. "I said. "yes please," "sugar and milk" she asked, I replied. "one sugar and a splash of milk please," she got up "won't be a couple of minutes" and left me alone. As soon as I was on my own again, I was thinking of how in one moment of complete madness I had ruined everything, everything was going so well and in a moment of stupidity and weakness I had ruined it all, shit I thought. It wasn't long before she returned and put two steaming cups of coffee on the desk, she put her hand on my shoulder and said. "just relax you're doing fine" she then went and sat back down, she took sip of her coffee and pulled a face "hope it's okay it only instant, anyhow, what about long term, are you planning to go to university or college, do you have any particular career in mind"? I hadn't really thought about the next few days from now, let alone months. So, I went with the Marion viewpoint, I took a sip of my coffee and then told her "I was looking at getting into teaching, probably primary school, I love working with younger kids, possibly English or Mathematics, Marion thought that I could do the studying at a local college rather than uni so I wouldn't get in so much debt." Mandy listened to me and nodded, she smiled at me and said "as I say we have two positions, one morning reception, one afternoon, the morning one is mainly telephone based although we do occasionally get customers come in but to be honest there is not a great deal of footfall, it's mainly taking orders over the phone, the afternoon gig is telephone and customer facing. We do the bridal flowers and arrangements at two thirty on a Tuesday and Thursday, normally it's just the mum's and the bride but sometimes it's a few more people, it's an informal affair with a chat and browse, we provide tea and coffee and a few nibbles, it's very popular. We do a slide show to demo what we have to offer. Julie, Lisa, and I do the flower arrangements, so we are too busy to look after the front of house so to speak. I need someone punctual, reliable, and presentable, I don't want tattoos or piercings on show, I see you have no visible tattoos and only have your ears pierced which is perfect, how we look and present ourselves is of the utmost importance. I need the individual to be conscientious, and from what I've seen today and what Marion has said about you, you fit the bill." I stared at her, was she offering me the job, it certainly sounded like it, I smiled and nodded feeling overwhelmed, she stared at me with raised eyebrows. "well what do you say, want to give it a three-month trial see if you like it, and we like you"? I nodded unable to speak, quick think of something I thought to myself. "what are the hours Mandy"? she pointed at me. "you're the first to be interviewed so the choice is yours, you can do the afternoon shift, that's two till five or the morning shift nine to twelve, it's your call, but I would say by your smart appearance and your punctuality the afternoon shift would be a better fit for you"? I couldn't believe my luck, I picked up my coffee and took another sip, the caffeine immediately making me feeling better. I did my best to pull myself together and give the impression that I was focused on this job even though all I could think of was what had happened earlier. "Yes, the afternoon job would be better for me as I have been offered a morning job in the boutique and I would like to do both"? she smiled a big wide-open smile. "I like you you're obviously a grafter, I like grafters, grab your coffee let me show you around." I picked up my cup and she walked slowly around the building showing me the flower storage areas outside and the inside arrangement area. She then took me back to the front of the shop and showed me the desk I would be working from and then the area where the presentations were carried out. She introduced me to Lisa who looked to be in her forties and seemed friendly, Mandy showed my some of the arrangements they had done, I had to say they were beautiful, we went down a little hallway and she showed my were the toilet and rest room was, we then ended up back in her office, she motioned for me to sit down. "So, here's the deal, three months trial, in that time you will be paid weekly in cash, after the trial period we pay monthly by direct bank transfer, so you will have to give us your bank details and we then pay your salary straight into your bank account the last Friday of the month. The working week is Monday to Friday during the trial period there is no paid leave and to be honest we prefer that you do not take leave unless it's for medical reasons, obviously we honour dental appointments and stuff. We are offering five pounds an hour basic with opportunities to top up your income with extra presentations should they be required. You will receive all of the training and equipment you need, we provide image clothing plus a nice allowance for tights, stockings and laundering your clothing, once you have been through your trial period, we offer quite competitive discounts, and you can join the pension scheme. We are part of a large franchise so it's a good secure job, if you wanted to you could turn it into a career as there are many development opportunities." I stared at her open mouthed, it sounded like a brilliant job, she smiled at me, stood up and put her hand out. "when can you start"? I needed time to think so I said. "Monday, err is Monday okay"? "Excellent" she said, we shook hands, and she showed me out, as we reached the main door, we shook hands again. "lovely to meet you, see you Monday two o'clock sharp, bye," she said as was disappeared back inside. I walked back on to the street not really comprehending what had just happened, this morning had been crazy, it was all too much for me to take in. I walked back up the road following Mattys directions to get to the boutique, I really didn't want to go in there after what had happened earlier today but I had promised her so I wouldn't let her down. I checked my watch it was now ten past eleven, the coffee had made me feel better, but I really needed to sit down and think. I walked until I reached the Mcdonalds, I would have liked to have gone in there to get myself another coffee, but as it was crowded, I was too scared to, so I walked past it and turned right and carried on walking. Matty had been right, it was a long walk, and it had taken me a lot more than the thirty minutes he reckoned it was by the time I could see the huge Electrical Superstore sign. I had almost reached the boutique when I saw a bench by a fish and chip shop, no one was sitting on it, so I sat down and freed my cardigan from the straps of my handbag and pulled it on, I put my bag on my lap and pondered on how to deal with the problems I had created. I just couldn't believe what I had done, it was a massive moment of complete stupidity, I had never even kissed a girl and yet I obviously felt it was acceptable to thank Matty by kissing him. What must he have thought, and then to top it all off I just walked away, no explanation nothing, I didn't even remember thanking him, he must have thought I was a totally selfish cow. I took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, I knew I was just making excuses for myself, that second that I decided to kiss him came from a very deeply buried emotion. I wanted someone who loved me in my life, someone like Matty, he seemed a genuinely nice guy, he was totally good looking and had the most hypnotic blue eyes, earlier on all of the time I was with him, I felt safe. The fantasy of believing I could be with him made me feel quite helpless, I dismissed the stupid notion of any form of relationship with anyone, let alone a nice guy like Matty, that couldn't happen to me, at least not to the female side of me, end of story. I decided I would write a letter to Matty explaining that we couldn't be friends, I would make an excuse up saying my dad forbade it or something. I stood up straightened my skirt and pulled my cardigan around me, the breeze had increased and the temperature down a good few degrees. It wasn't the greatest idea but at least a letter would save me having to face him, if I avoided Matty I could work and earn enough money to move on. I walked up the short distance to the boutique, despite of everything I had just said to myself, I looked in the doorway of the Electrical outlet to see if I could see him, I felt a flicker of disappointment, there was no sign of him. I cursed myself, what are you doing you stupid cow it was though I was wanting him to see me. Feeling disappointed I crossed the road and went into the boutique, as usual there was no sign of anyone about apart from a couple of women looking at the handbags, I put my own handbag behind the counter and went over to them. "need any help"? I asked, they shook their heads "no thank you" they said politely, disappointed I went looking for Tiffany. The shop was a bit of a mess if I were to be honest, there were clothes laid over the tops of the rails and a pile by the changing room. As I walked around the store, I planned on tidying various areas that were cluttered and hoovering the carpet. After looking just about everywhere for Tiffany, I found her in a large room hidden from the main shop floor, she was unpacking boxes of garments and putting them on hangers, she then ticked off a spreadsheet which said stock and then unpacked the next one. I tapped on the door to let her know I was there and walked in, she seemed flustered and was very red in the face. "Hi Tiffany, how are you, what do you need me to do"? she looked up and gave me the loveliest of smiles. "Morning Rebecca, I've had better days I've got to say, thank the lord you came in, unbelievably my supplier had just delivered a months' worth of stock on the same day! He's meant to deliver it over a four-week period to allow me time to tag and process it, but he's got a driver gone long term sick so as you can see, I'm buried in stock" she seemed quite relieved that I was there which made me feel a lot better. She stopped what she was doing and unbelievably came up to me and wrapped her arms around me and we shared a quick cuddle. She smelt gorgeous and her clothes rustled as she moved "you're my little angel, could you manage the shop while I am doing this, if you get a sale give me a shout and I will start teaching you how to use the till and process card payments." I nodded and gave her a smile I really liked her, I wanted to be someone she could trust and rely on. "leave it with me I'll shout if I need help" I said as I walked back out onto the shop floor. The sun had come back out, and I felt a lot warmer so I took my cardigan off and put it over the back of a chair which was behind the counter. I pushed myself up onto the chair and surveyed the shop, the two ladies were still browsing and a women with a baby buggy had just come in. I decided to play it cool and let whatever was going to happen, happen. The women with the baby buggy approached me, I slid discreetly off of the chair. "where are your tights love"? she stared at me, I think she was waiting for me to point, I decided that pointing was rude, so I came around the counter and showed her the rack. She spun it around looking. "was it something specific you wanted" I asked her, she stopped looking and turned to me "I wanted ten denier in black do you have any"? Not wanting to look stupid I said, I don't think there is any on that rack, but I'm sure we have some the stock room hang on I'll get you some is it just the one pair"? The lady said she would have two pairs if we had them, so I nipped to where I knew Tiffany was. "Tiffany I need two pairs of black ten denier tights, do we have any"? Tiffany thought for a moment and then said. "isn't there any on the rack, they should be at the bottom next to the hold ups, if there are none there go to the bottom drawer of the counter second row there may be some in there, if not, no we unfortunately haven't got any." I rushed back to the customer and looked at the bottom shelf of the rack, I span the stand around, hold ups, stockings, ah, tights black 10 denier. "There you go madam, two pairs black, I checked the price on them, one seventy-five a pair seemed expensive for tights, but they were Pretty Polly, which is a good brand, that will be three pounds fifty please." Thankfully Tiffany came rushing up. "did we have any" she asked, I nodded, the lady gave me the right money, Tiffany pulled me in close to her and showed me how to cash up the sale and passed the receipt to me I passed the tights and the receipt to the customer "thank you for your business" I said trying to sound professional. The customer smiled at me took her purchase and left the store, Tiffany patted my on the shoulder "well done, I must do an inventory on that rack when I get minute," that was something I could do when I had free time I thought. We had a few sales throughout the early afternoon nothing massive, I sold a couple of gorgeous Ralph Lauren cocktail dresses, probably a couple of hundred pounds total, I had done a card transaction and a few cash transaction, so my confidence had grown. By three thirty I was feeling really hungry, having had no lunch and just a coffee at the florists, as the shop was empty, I headed back to the stock room to see if Tiffany wanted a drink, she looked absolutely fed up and exhausted. "Don't you think you should take a break Tiffany, you've been at it hours, I'm here tomorrow so we can get stuck in together"? she smiled at me and sighed. "your right honey, here I'll show you where the toilets and the break room are. "What about the shop, its unattended"? I said, she grinned at me, and said "don't worry we can see the monitor in the break room we can keep your eye on it while I make us a drink and find something for us to nibble." We both had coffee and thankfully she had a packet of digestive biscuits, Tiffany took the chance to tell be about the workings of the shop and explained product placement and profit margins. She showed me where my locker was and gave me the key, we chatted about fashion and stuff while we both watched the monitor, we both heard the beep as the door opened and then we looked at the monitor, I was about to say I'll get it, when I recognised the customer, to my horror, I saw it was Matty. "Tiffany, could you do me a favour,? that guy who just came in, well he knows me, and I don't want to see him, could you get rid of him for me, I'll explain everything once he's gone." Tiffany grinned at me and winked "what have you been up to you naughty girl" she put her mug down and with a swish she headed out to the shop floor. I watched as they had a brief conversation and then I saw Matty walk away. Tiffany came bursting back in "dish the dirt what's going on between you two, I have to say he's a bit of a dish, those eyes of his draw you in don't they, I wouldn't throw him out of my bed." I felt guilty and vulnerable, and tried my best to end any speculation she may have had about Matty and me. "Well for one, we've been up to nothing" I said, seeing in her face that she didn't really believe me, I tried my best to ignore the look she had on her face and continued "he saw me dressing the manikin in the window yesterday apparently, then by coincidence, yeah right, we were on the same bus home, he sat next to me, and we chatted, that was all." Tiffany had a massive grin on her face. "he fancies you" she said grinning. I couldn't help but laugh from embarrassment. "no he doesn't" I blurted out. For some reason I felt really relaxed with her, so I told her about what happened earlier this morning. She put her hand over her mouth and her eyes went wide "you kissed him" I chewed my lip and nodded. She shook her head. "no wonder he's looking for you, you gave him a signal that's why he told me he wanted to urgently talk to you, Oh Rebecca, he seemed so nice, and you two would make a great couple." "Besides you can't treat the poor guy like that, the least you owe him is an explanation." I was about to say no when the door alarm beeped, and I saw a couple of young women enter the shop. "I'll get this" I said. "you finish your coffee." I served them, only one women was buying but she spent thirty- nine pounds, it all adds up I thought, I thanked them and then carried on making the inventory for the hosiery rack. I checked my watch it was nearly four o'clock the time had passed in a heartbeat, at around four thirty it got quite busy, and we had half a dozen more customers one lady bought a coat for her daughter which was eighty pounds, I was quite chuffed about that sale. Gradually the shop emptied, and I was feeling pretty tired and ready to go home. Tiffany appeared with two carrier bags and passed them to me. "that's your uniform for you, three skirts, three blouses and two pairs of shoes, I've put a pack of six barely black hold ups in there, you'll find them far more convenient than tights, quicker to pee and more comfortable" she smiled as I took them off of her, I didn't want to be seen out in public in such a short skirt, but I couldn't do anything but thank her. We were in the middle of cashing up, when the was a loud clap of thunder and the sky opened up, Tiffiany looked at me as I stood in front of her in my summer cap sleeved top. "Have you got a coat with you honey" she asked, I shook my head, she grinned at me, it's a good job you work in a clothes shop, we'll lock up and I'll sort you out with a coat and a brolly. Five o'clock came, she locked up the shop and turned the main lights off, I followed tiffany into the stock room. "I've got a couple of coats in here, they are both size ten they were going to be disposed of because of mismatched buttons poor stitching and there are no care labels so take either or take both, your most welcome." She went over to a rail and took the coats off of it, one was a black mac type with a belt, the other was a quite nice winter coat with a pretend fur collar in a plumb colour, with two front pockets, I liked both. "could I have both of them please, I'm short of coats, well to be honest I haven't even got a proper coat" she passed them to me "well it's your lucky day, there yours" she said smiling. I decided to wear the nice winter coat home, now it had started raining it really wasn't that warm, and it didn't look like it was going to stop anytime soon, Tiffany held the coat out for me and then gave me a telescopic umbrella to keep in my handbag. I went back to the counter and put my cardigan in one of the carrier bags and the other coat in the other, I then put my handbag over my shoulder. I was quite glad we left by the side door, as I had visions of Matty waiting outside the store for me. Tiffany and I said our goodbyes and went our separate ways, it was still raining quite heavy, and I was really struggling, what with trying to hold the umbrella over my head and carrying the two carrier bags, I had only walked got to the end of the high street and I had found it was exhausting, I just hoped I didn't miss my bus. Eventually I was just a few hundred yards from the bus stop, my arms felt like they were being pulled out of their sockets, my bare legs were freezing, and my feet squelched in my wedges, making them hard to walk in as my feet kept trying to slide forward. I was thinking about giving up trying to stop keeping the umbrella and just get soaked to make it easier to carry the bags when I heard a shout that made my blood run cold, it was Matty calling out my name, my heart pounded, and a feeling of resignation came over me. "Becky, Becky, hang on" he shouted, I wanted to drop my bags and run and try to find somewhere safe to hide, but I thought about what Tiffany had said and stopped. I lifted my umbrella to see him running across the road, he had a parker on with the hood over his head. "I was at the bus stop, I thought it was you, here let me take your bags," he reached out and I gratefully handed my bags to him. "Thanks Matty" I said not really knowing how to deal with his continued attentions and feeling like I had no control of the situation. He smiled at me through the furry hood of his parker. "how did your interview go"? I lifted my umbrella to look at him, it wasn't his fault, this was all my doing I was a disaster waiting to happen. "thanks to you Matty, I did actually get the job, I really appreciate what you did for me this morning you know that" he grinned at me and then winked at me. "I thought you did" he replied. We reached the bus stop, it was still raining heavily, and it was cold, the wooden seat at the bus stop was soaked, so we stood and waited in silence, thankfully it wasn't too long before the bus arrived, as there was a real awkwardness between us. Matty picked up my bags and took them onto the bus for me, I ducked on to the bus out of the rain keeping my brolly outside, shook it and then closed it. I was just going to my handbag to get my purse to find the change to pay when Matty turned around and said to me "don't worry I've got this," before I had the chance to refuse, he gave the driver the money. I was annoyed that was the last thing I wanted, I looked down the aisle the bus, it was virtually empty so I threw myself down the first seat knowing I would end up with him sat next to me. I found my purse and got my money out to pay Matty back, I had to stop this and stop it now! Just as I had thought he would, he plonked himself down next to me, I turned to face him. "Matty I will be really annoyed if you don't let me pay you for my fare," I said to him, I tried to show a bit of anger to make him believe I was serious. Thankfully he took it without an argument, which surprised me, and he actually seemed fine about it, he said "cheers" and put the change in his pocket. I sat there deliberately keeping quiet, the less conversation the better I thought. Matty though had other ideas. "is it because you've already got a boyfriend"? I turned to face him to find him staring into my face, stupidly I blurted out "of course I haven't got a boyfriend"! As soon as I had said it, I realised what an idiot I was, all I had needed to say was yes, and as Matty was actually a nice guy he probably would have left me alone. I just stared at him feeling trapped and yet charmed, surely this hunk of guy wasn't interested in me, I quickly tried to get to grips with what was happening, I was allowing my emotions to overcome my common sense. I took a deep breath and tried to break my eyes away from the pools of blue that were drawing me in. "look Matty, you're a really sweet guy and Mmm" before I had the chance to finish speaking, he had moved in closer and kissed me, this wasn't the same as the little peck I had given him this morning, this was so much more, inside my head I screamed no stop this, and knew I needed to pull away, but I didn't. I had never felt anything like it before, my arms burst into goosebumps my chest tightened I couldn't breathe. I felt my cheeks flair and the heat overcome me as I lost control of my senses, I shouted for him to stop but I could hear nothing. Thankfully the bus went around a corner and pulled us in different directions. I was speechless, I knew I was blushing, I turned my head and looked straight ahead trying to come to terms with what had just happened. I wasn't sure what was going through Matty's head as he sat there in silence, I felt guilty this was all my fault, this morning I should have just said thank you, what on earth made me kiss him. I felt I owed it to him to tell him the truth, he was such a lovely guy and I needed to distance myself from him, as I was beginning to in a strange way to enjoy his attention and fall for him which was totally wrong. I turned to face him, he turned to look at me, this time I made sure there was a safe distance between us, as soon as we made eye contact, I said. "Look Matty, I am flattered that you want to get to know me but it's just not possible for us to be together, my parents have disappeared and left me homeless, and I now live in the children's home. As I'm not yet eighteen I am a ward of the state, which means they could send me anywhere so there is no future for us. So, all I am really saying is it just wouldn't work in so many ways." He took a deep breath and stared at me, I tried not to, but I started to feel so emotional, he didn't deserve this, and it was all my fault, I felt a tear roll down my cheek and end on my lip, but I couldn't stop staring into his deep blue eyes. Unexpectedly he smiled at me took my hand off of my handbag and held it in his, he moved his head and said quietly. "I'll tell you what Becky, why don't we start again and just be friends, you've been honest with me, so I'm gonna be honest with you, I think you know that I find you really attractive, in fact I think you're beautiful, and if I'm honest I think you find me a little bit, I won't say attractive I'll say a little bit interesting" he stopped, moved to face me and smiled and then patted the back of my hand. He then leant right in and whispered. "Obviously I want to get to know you, it's only natural when a guy fancies a girl, why can't we just be friends and see what the future holds." All the time he whispered in my ear my skin went to goosebumps and I felt weak, I nodded as he stroked the back of my hand. "I'm sorry about your mum and dad that's really horrible for you, if ever you want someone to talk to, I'm here for you, I wouldn't tell anyone else I promise you," I turned to face him. "thanks Matty that would be nice of you" I gave him a weak smile, if only I thought. And that was it for me, the flood gates opened, and the tears started, I found myself once again wallowing in self-pity, he let go of my hand and pulled me into him, at the same time putting his arm around me and stroking my arm. In my past life I had never really been shown any form of emotional support or any real physical contact either from my parents or anybody else come to think of it. I remember when I was younger and had been upset over something, I yearned for my dad to give me a cuddle, he never did, he only ever cuddled my sister, my mum tried to make up for it, but even she had become frightened of showing me any affection because of the way my dad was. He would get so angry and accuse my mum of mollycoddling me, you'll turn him soft, he used to shout at her. In the end I never even tried to get or expected to get any emotional support from either of them. I became withdrawn and reclusive just like the lady police officer had described me. The only thing that kept me going was my dream that I would at some point in my young life become a girl, that everything would turn out alright in the end. It was a reoccurring theme that I would stupidly imagine that one day it would all change overnight, and I would wake up to find I had changed into a girl. Obviously the older I got the more desperately I needed this to happen, but it was a dream and obviously it never happened. Once I was thirteen, I realised that I was forever trapped and had been given a life sentence to be a boy for the rest of my life, which made me cry often. Having to admit that my emotional support and any hope for the future was based on a silly dream, well I found that more upsetting than anything. And now here I was, my emotions were out of control, every time I felt that I would have to go back to living my life as boy I felt myself surrender to the feeling of despair and I ended up an emotional wreck. I think that was why I so helplessly crying into Mattys chest, he made it safe for me for me to release my emotions, he made me feel that everything would be alright. I think that was why I kissed him this morning, he had made everything alright. Of course, we didn't really know each other, and what had happened over the last couple of days was an irrelevance in the grand scheme of things. If I let myself become too emotionally attached to someone like Matty it would be my downfall. As much as I needed someone like Matty in my life, it just couldn't be allowed to happen, I knew I needed to be a lot stronger than I currently was being, I needed to take control of my life, but the problem is its always easier said than done. I cried myself out but still lay across Matty's chest, it was lovely to know someone like him wanted to get to know me, he actually said he wanted to be my friend, so at least we could spend time together without it jeopardising my future. I could feel him still stroking my arm thought my coat, I didn't want to move, I was warm and felt loved, well to be honest my legs were cold, but I could live with that. I knew the situation I now found myself in was of my own making, and the only person who could put things right was me. Eventually the bus was approaching my stop, I felt Matty gently shaking me. "Becky this is your stop" he said quietly as I slowly pushed myself off of him. I smoothed my hair back out of my face and gave him a weak smile. "Sorry Matty I'm being unfair to you, you are a lovely guy and I do find you interesting, well if I'm honest, more than interesting but let's just be friends and look out for each other. He smiled at me and nodded, he reached up and smoothed my hair back, I kissed my finger and touched it to his lips, I so wanted to kiss him. The bus pulled to a stop, and he stood up, and then reached down and picked up my bags. "I'm not letting you struggle with these," he said as he held my arm and helped me down the step of the bus, it was still raining so I put my umbrella up and stood there like a lemon wondering what was going on. The bus pulled away and Matty was still stood there, I looked at him "Matty this is not your stop, that was the last bus"! he grinned at me. "do as your told, let a friend help you" he said as he took my umbrella from me and held it above his head, tuck yourself under my arm and lets go. So, we ended up slowly walking up the drive to the home, he carried both bags and held the umbrella while I was just tucked into his side staying dry, it was a surreal moment in my life. As we made our way up the drive Matty started speaking in a posh voice pretending to be royalty or something, he was quite funny and did an amazing impression of prince Charles which had me laughing. All too soon we reached the main door, once we under the canopy of the porch Matty put my bags down by my feet and passed me the umbrella, I felt a tang of sadness, he deserved so much better than me, despite my instincts screaming no at me, I grabbed the strings from his parka hood and pulled them until his face was almost level with mine and kissed him, just a little peck but enough to let him know I appreciated him as a friend. He grinned at me and stood up straight. "I'll see you around Becky, you take care" he said as he turned and walked back down the long drive. I stayed were I was watching him until he was out of sight, he turned once and I waved to him, he waved back and then was gone. Something changed for me that evening, I realised that despite everything I could have a friend that was a guy, it wasn't hurting anyone was it?