Maxines Divorce episode 15
- 3 years ago
- 19
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“Max, I’m going for a coffee want me to bring you one?” Ed Martin, aka the bondsman, asked as he walked toward the door of our small office.
“No thanks Ed,” I replied. “The coffee from my Mr. Coffee is fine with me. I’m not really a big fan of designer coffee. Too many years of bad coffee.” I replied.
“Yeah, you haven’t been out long enough to develop a taste for the finer things in life.”
Finer things in life I wasn’t sure about, but I hadn’t been out of the Air Force very long, that was true. I had done most of my twenty two years in the Air Police. During that time I had done everything from ride in a patrol car patrolling the base housing area, to guarding convoys in Afghanistan. It had been a long and eventful 22 years. Unfortunately I got frozen in rank at master sergeant. I had been told by my last commanding officer, that I would never rise above my rank at the time. According to him, I was not a team player That being the case, I pulled the plug at 22 years.
That little conversation came while I was recovering from a piece of shrapnel in my belly. Compared to most of the wounds from that stupid war, it wasn’t even worth mentioning. If it had not been for the conversation with Captain Hartman, I wouldn’t have bothered.
By the way don’t let anyone tell you that you are safe in an armored Humvee. My life was probably saved more by the shortage of explosives in Afghanistan, than by the kevlar. Fortunately the IED wasn’t as big as it might have been the year before. The Vee was a total loss, but thankfully I wasn’t.
I had planned to retire at thirty and do very little, if anything afterward. When I went out at 22years, I had to look for something to fill my time and to supplement my pension. I was fortunate. If I could stand the long lines, I had free medical coverage from the VA. I probably would go with the co-pay and use the private coverage available to me.
I found myself back in Aster because I had this old high school friend named Jennifer. She had gone on to the state university and become a lawyer. Jen and I had stayed in touch over the years. Mostly it had been Christmas cards and a wedding invitation every few years. There had been 22 Christmas cards and five wedding invitations to be exact. Two of the invitations were mine and three were hers. Her third marriage was still intact, while my second husband had been killed in Iraq. It was only a couple of weeks after the end of combat operations there. Somebody forgot to tell the rag heads to stop sending rockets into the American compounds.
Even then I was still a reasonably attractive 41 year old woman, even so I didn’t date much. All my old friends were far away and I hadn’t made many new ones. The only unattached man I knew well was Ed, and he was about seventy. Even though we shared an office Ed and I didn’t really work together.
My friend, the lawyer, convinced me to open a process server business. She hooked me up with all her lawyer friends. Jen also helped me place advertisements in the most well read lawyer rags. I had been at it about six months and business was picking up slowly. I didn’t spend much time in the office, so the desk space in Ed’s little converted filling station was more than enough for me.
Other than sleeping, I didn’t spend much time at home either. The one room garage apartment was also enough space for me. The small space was located over Jen’s two car garage. Her current husband didn’t seem to mind me living there. They certainly didn’t need my paltry rent, so it had to be the fact that I don’t close my blinds when I dress. There was only one window in the apartment and it faced the house. I can only be seen from the upstairs windows of the main house. Jen’s husband never mentioned seeing me naked, but he always had a wolfish look when we passed in the hallway. I didn’t mind that he probably saw me, Hell, I didn’t mind that Jen might have seen me as well. It has been a lot of years since I was shy about such things.
I lost my virginity when I was fifteen. I lost it to a grown man, who managed the mall’s video arcade. He was cute, and I liked to hang out there after school, and on weekends. He showed me the right amount of attention, and he said the right things. I was young and full of raging hormones, so it was a natural thing that happened. I wasn’t legal, I knew it even then, but neither of us cared.
After a few months he moved on to a new teenager, so I moved on to boys my own age. Twenty five years ago oral sex wasn’t so common, so it was mostly hugging, kissing, and hand jobs until I graduated high school.
Upon graduation I signed up for the Air Force, just to get away from home. I was probably smart enough for college, but I came from a fatherless home. My mom was divorced and working her butt off to keep me and my brother fed. There was just no money for college. Twenty years ago there were far fewer college loans available. Probably a good thing, since I didn’t start my adult life in debt, like so many kids do these days.
I found myself at forty one living on a tiny pension, in a tiny apartment, trying to get a tiny business started. It was going to be a struggle for a while, but I honestly didn’t mind. It was more fun to live without stuff. In the end you don’t own stuff, it owns you.
I drive a stupid minivan only because Jen had one she wanted to sell. It proved to be a good decision, even if it had been an accidental one. Most days I run around town in jeans and tee shirts. I dress younger than I probably should, but people don’t seem to mind. At least if they have a problem with it, they keep it to themselves.
The minivan allowed me to carry a dress and fancy shoes. Now and then I needed to dress up a little. It had only happened a couple of times, but there are places I can’t get into wearing jeans. They keep me out of the country club, even if I do have my boobs hanging out. Since I never had kids I can wear a thin bra without having them at my knees. It seemed that sometimes people just wanted me to pretend to be ladylike. Hey I can pretend with the best of them.
“At Your Service,” I said into the phone after I stopped it ringing.
“Hey Max, it’s me Milton Price,” said the metallic voice.
“Hello Mr Price,” I replied. Price was a lawyer I had gladly added to my slowly growing client list.
“Got a tricky one for you. By the way call me Milt or Milton at least.”
“Sorry Mr. Price, too many years in the military.”
“Oh okay, anyway the husband wants to be sure his wife doesn’t grab everything, so we are freezing the bank accounts. I want her served first, then I want you to call me immediately so we can freeze the assets right after.”
“You know that is going to cost extra. I have never made a notification like that before. How about ten bucks added to the bill for the call.”
“You are a hard hearted money hungry lady, but I like that about you. Sure I’m just going to pass it on to him anyway.”
“Good I’ll swing by for the paper after lunch, unless you want to pay the emergency service price?”
“How much more is that?”
“Instead of the twenty five it is double to fifty then there is the ten return notice expedite fee.” I just made up the term ‘expedited notice fee’ on the spot.. “Think fast, and be flexible airman”, I remembered that advice from my time on the line.
“So sixty bucks and you will do it now?”
“Yes, just hand me the check, and the address to serve it, when you hand me the papers.”
Except for the rush it was a typical transaction. I waited for Ed to come back, before I left for the office of Price and Sloan Attorneys at law. When I walked into the door of the office, I found myself in a room that could have been in a hundred year old building. It was actually in a building no more than five years old. Lawyers liked to look as though they had been in business for generations it seemed.
“Can I help you?” the receptionist asked.
I didn’t comment on the young woman’s grammar. Instead I replied, “I’m Maxine Stone, from At Your Service. You should have a document for me to serve.”
“Yes Ms Stone, Mr Price said you would be right over. In your case that meant right over. Some people take hours to get here.”
She was a chatty little thing. She was certainly cute enough. She was definitely young and I expected firm bodied as well. Any other time I might have chated a few moments with her, but at that moment I was in the work mode. Over the years I had learned to separate my private life from my work life. I expect that is really what bugged my bosses over the years. In the military not many people seem to manage that consistently.
She did smile sweetly as she handed me the large brown envelope. I looked inside to be sure that the check was with the folded blue wrapped papers. The envelope contained the legal paper I needed to hand to the lady named on the attached index card. I also needed to ask her to sign the fake form on my clipboard. If she refused, I simply made a note of it. I also took a quick shot with my digital camera whenever it was possible. It helped, if I ever had to go to court. The camera I used was a poor quality thing about the size of a credit card case. It could shoot inside without flash, which was a big plus, otherwise it was just a small low quality digital camera.
“Thank you,” I said as I turned to leave the office.
The fact that I found the receptionist cute might have bothered me once upon a time. Those days were long gone. I was always reading in women’s magazines that all women were probably biologically bisexual, but chose to suppress the inclination. I just choose not to do that anymore.
After a few weeks into my first enlistment I found that I could enjoy both men and women, pretty much on the same level, . men and women were segregated in the early part of my career, so any surplus sexual feelings had to be taken care of in a different way. Lots and lots of masturbation went on in those first weeks. All the women in my training flight were young and healthy, so it was pretty normal.
The girl/girl hookups began with the few women who were pure lesbians finding each other. From there it spread to those of us who had been experimenting with open masturbation. That kind of worked it’s way into girl/girl sex. Yes, I was right there trying it all. I was young and not all that moral, so it was no real problem for me to justify it. I don’t think I ever considered myself homosexual, just open minded.
I’m not sure my commanding officers would have felt the same. That’s why don’t ask, don’t tell worked. We could all pretend, just like I did when I wore a dress and high heels to get into the country club lounge after six pm. I pretended to be a hi class, high maintenance lady instead of the no class, wrong side of the tracks, bisexual bitch that I really am. Hey I know what I am and it works just fine for me.
Enough of my miserable life, I thought as I climbed into the minivan for the drive to Crestview Estates. Crestview was one of those over priced, over decorated, housing developments. Of the fifty houses probably only two were occupied by real Aster residence. All the rest of the home owners drove from the larger city next door each night just to sleep in the country. Why the hell they bothered was beyond me. Crestview and the more heavily populated, cheaper but still similar developments around it were driving the cost of everything higher. I knew that only because Jen and her Husband were one of the few Aster families living in an only slightly downscale Crestview type development. In that one maybe five percent of the residents were really from Aster. The rest of them even called Tryon for their plumbers. The thought of doing anything or using any service from Aster was dreadfully pedestrian.
It was no wonder the Aster kids hated the Crestview kids. Oh the Crestview residents loved the Aster schools, even with the open animosity of the locals. They got to send their kids to school in a system with much less crime than the schools in Tryon. The got better schools without paying high taxes or private school tuition. What was not to like about that.
A very few of the businesses in Aster did business with the Crestview types. Judging from the address on the card inside my folder, divorce lawyers seemed to be among them. The drive to Crestview only took a few minutes but it was really a world away. The grass seemed greener in the yards of the million dollar houses. Crestview was the highest level of prosperity, but the lower level subdivisions got lumped in with Crestview. Ones like the development where Jen and her husband lived. I was headed for Crestview proper that morning.
The house looked like a small stone castle. There were round stone parts that looked like mini watch towers. They looked as though there should be archers standing by to fight off the locals. It was all just an illusion though, the stone walls were most likely made from fiberglass panels. I knew it was no castle because there was no moat. What is a castle without a moat?
I took my brown envelope with the folded sheath of papers, wrapped in the blue cover sheet, inside to the front door. I knocked on the wooden storm door with what had to be the most expensive door knocker made. It was heavy and could have been gold for all I knew. I banged it softly at firs, but after a few minutes of waiting in the sun, I banged hell out of it. Still no one came to the door.
I opened the outer door to put a card with my phone number and a message inside. The message was that I urgently needed to speak with the occupant. I even checked the index card and then wrote Mrs. Porter, in the blank space. It wasn’t very personal, but it had worked once. When the huge wooden storm door opened, I noted that the house door had been splintered. Someone had kicked the hell out of that big assed door.
Since I had been a cop, even if it was a military cop, I used my knuckles to push on the door. I had no interest in leaving my finger prints on it. The door opened so I shouted, “Mrs. Porter, its Maxine Stone are you home. I need to speak with you.” I was afraid that something bad had happened to Mrs Porter, but I sure as hell didn’t plan to enter that house without more reason than I had at that moment.
Instead of going inside, I backed into the yard where I dialed 911 on my cell phone.. “911 What is your emergency?” the female voice asked.
“I found a door kicked in when I tried to get in touch with the resident at 200 Crestview Circle. I think you need to send the police or sheriff out. I think someone has broken in.”
“Are there any injured people inside?” the operator asked.
“I have no idea, I don’t want to walk into a house with the door kicked in. Do you want me to go look around?”
“No stay where you are, I have the sheriff’s deputies on the way. Stay on the line please.”
“Not a problem, I’ll be in the front yard so tell them not to ride in with guns blazing.”
“We don’t do that kind of thing, and they do know yo u are the woman who called it in.”
“Good,” I replied. It actually was a load off my mind. I had no desire to deal with an injured person, or something worse. It took only a few minutes before I heard the first siren. I tried to keep an open mind while I waited. The best case scenario would be a missing plasma TV.
“What happened?” the teenage deputy asked.
“I was going to leave a card in the door, when I noticed that it was splintered. I pushed it open and called for the homeowner. When I didn’t get an answer, I decided to call 911.”
“Okay, you stay right here while I look around.”
“Works for me,” I replied. I didn’t even smile at the kid with a gun. He had no idea that I was more familiar with a firearm than he would most likely ever be. Since I did like younger men now and then, I tried to play nice.
When he came out, he was a little green around the gills. “What did you find?” I asked.
He took a deep breath, held up his hand for me to shut up, then he keyed his radio. “221 to dispatch. You need to send the homicide detective, an ambulance, and 721 out here.”
“Was it a middle-age woman?” I asked.
“Yes,” he replied quietly.
“Most likely Mrs Porter,” I suggested. “I was here to serve papers on her. She and her husband seem to be going through a divorce.”
“You need to stay till the detectives arrive,” he suggested.
“Okay, do you mind if I wait in the van. This is a little upsetting.”
“Okay, Just don’t leave.” I nodded.
Just as soon as I was in the van, I called the number on the index card for Eddie Price. “Price and Sloan how my I direct your call?”
“This is Maxine Stone. I need to talk to Milton Price. It is important.” Even though I said it was important it took several minutes for Price to answer.”
“Maxine did you serve the papers?”
“No, but I’m not refunding your money. This call is worth every penny. Mrs Porter may have been murdered.” I went on to tell him the whole story almost second by second.
“Stay were you are and try to find out all you can. I’m going to get Porter in here and see what is what.”
“When you talk to him, remember somebody kicked in the door. He probably wouldn’t have done that, if he did the deed. After all he does still have a key, I assume.”
“Good point Maxine I’ll keep that in mind, when I talk to the cops. I am pretty sure we will be having a chat.”
“Me too, since I had to tell them about the divorce. I didn’t tell them about the frozen assets yet. I don’t have any privilege, so I will probably have to tell them that I have no idea what kind of papers I am serving.”
“That will help. If they ask for them, try to call me before you turn them over. I might be able to invoke privilege.”
“I can try.”
I put the phone away, then studied the scene outside the house. There were two marked sheriff’s cars, two unmarked cars and an ambulance crew standing by. It was obvious that someone inside the house was very dead. The ambulance crew had not been allowed inside so there was no hope for the victim.
Since the detectives were still inside, they were obviously trying to figure something out. I waited until the crime scene van drove up before I attempted to enter the house. When I got stopped at the door, I explained, “I need to go back to work. So are you finished with me.”
“Stay here, I’ll ask someone if you can go.” the kid cop suggested.
When he turned his back I followed him deeper into the house. I got a glimpse inside the living room door before anyone noticed me. There was a woman on the floor. The absence of any blood convinced me that she had probably been strangled. Just about anything else would leave blood. Even poisoning would most likely leave a puddle of vomit. My guess was strangulation.
“Hey, get that woman the hell out of my crime scene,” one of the detectives, who happened to be a woman, shouted at the kid cop.
“Hey, can I go back to work?”
“Leave your number with the patrolman and you can go anywhere you want, Just as long as you don’t want to leave this county.”
While we had our one sentence conversation, I took in as much of the crime scene as I could. She didn’t look like she had put up much of a fight, at least her clothes weren’t torn and I didn’t see any of her clothes laying around her, so I assumed that it was a straight up murder. Nothing screamed sexual assault, but then only a good thorough autopsy could tell for sure. Still that little bit of information was better than nothing. There was also the absence of blood, which suggested strangulation.
I drove back to the office but on the way I got calls so I served two more court papers.. I picked them up and delivered them without anything out of the ordinary taking place. I drove toward the office at the end of the day to leave the records box. I didn’t want to leave one of the few things of my dad had left behind, when he left mom in the van overnight. I kept my records in his old metal fishing tackle box. Mom said he had used it in the early years of their marriage. I felt like it and my record of deliveries would be better protected in Ed’s office.
“Max, how far off are you?” Ed asked in an elevated voice.
“I’m five minutes out and headed to the office,” I replied into the cell phone.
“Can you swing by Jake’s clinic. He has had an incident.”
“Sure Max, you gonna’ bail me out,” I said it as I put the pedal to the floor. Max wouldn’t have called me, if it was something he could handle himself. It was a short drive to Jake’s Aster Clinic. The clinic smelled of strong disinfectant I noticed as I entered the front door.
“Hi I’m Maxine Stone, Jake’s father asked me to stop bye.” The receptionist at the Aster Clinic was not young or chatty. She didn’t even speak to me. She announced my presence into the intercom, then motioned me to the single door leading into the clinic proper.
A woman in green surgical scrubs opened the door for me. She didn’t look friendly, but she did look terrified. I noted the contrast between her and the receptionist. The receptionist had been icy, but this woman was clearly afraid. She didn’t speak. She just led me back into the bowels of clinic.
I found Jake’s son sitting at his desk staring at a bottle of Jack Daniels Black Label “So what’s up Jake.”
“I should have called the cops instead of calling dad first.”
“Why is that Jake, because he sent a woman?” I said it intentionally. I wanted him on the defense.
“Nothing like that, It just seems to be who I should call.”
“Tell me what happened, then we can decide what to do. Cops might be the best thing or maybe not.”
“Okay, some thugs burst into the clinic. They held us at gunpoint demanding money and drugs. I told them we don’t keep drugs here, so they demanded that I write them a scrip. They said that they would be back every week for a new one. They also said that the clinic had a new landlord and the rent to stay in business was a thousand a week.”
“Did they tell you when they would be back?”
“Friday,” he replied.
“Well you can call the cops and they will do what they can to find the guys. My guess is that they are from Tryon. When they go across jurisdictions. it is harder to get anything done. Or I can hang out here Friday and give them a surprise. Of course your dad can find out who it was, and I can scare pure hell out of them. It’s really up to you.”
“I think I’ll call the cops. No offense Ms Stone.”
“None taken Doc,” I said that as I stood to leave.
“Could I pay you to come hang out of Friday, just in case.”
“Call the local police tell them what happened, and see if they want to do that. If not get in touch with me.”
“Fair enough,” he replied. “Do I owe you for stopping by?”
“No, I’m going to take it off my rent.” I smiled as I walked from his office.
“So?” Ed asked as I carried my dad’s tackle box to the safe room. The safe room was a concrete block room with double walls and a very secure steel door. Ed used it to store his files and I used it to store my dad’s tackle box and my small weapons collection.
“I’m sure he told you someone decided to sell him an insurance policy. One that only covers protection from the guys who sold it.”
“Yeah, but it was also armed robbery, since they stole the prescription at gunpoint.”
“That’s how I see it. He decided to call the cops.”
“They won’t do shit.” Ed said scornfully.
“I don’t know how good your cops are. I haven’t dealt with them.”
“Best he can hope for is that they park an empty squad car in the parking lot. To seem not to fucking be, that’s their motto.” He said it angrily.
“I told him I would standby on Friday, if the cops wouldn’t.”
“Good, if he has any sense he will let you.
“You might want to tell him that. All he saw was a small woman with even smaller boobs. That image doesn’t inspire much confidence with most men.”
“Yeah well none of them know you, or they wouldn’t feel that way.”
“So if the cops won’t give him real protection, tell him he can trust me.”
“You know he don’t make a lot of money at that clinic?” The clinic was for mostly medicade and medicare patients. Private pay, or Private insurance patients tended to prefer appointments and waiting rooms with a better aroma. “If it comes down to it, we can work something out. You do know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean. Let’s hope it don’t come down to it.” I replied.
After the conversation with Ed, I took a chance that Price might still be in the office. “Mr. Price,” I said into the phone. “I thought I would fill you in on what little I know.” I went on to tell him everything I knew and even what I guessed. I also told him to get the police reports if he wanted to know for sure. I explained that I was just guessing.
“So what do you think?” he asked when I finished.
“I am sort of working for your client and I think he did it. That should tell you something.”
“Yeah it does, but he has an alibi.”
“Me and the police would expect no less. I hope his bank accounts have one as well. It looks a lot like murder for hire. If he didn’t do it, someone who knew her did, or had it done. I would bet my ass on that. Not that my ass is of much value.”
I took myself to dinner that night since it was Friday. It was the height of my week. I had always splurged when alone on a Friday night. I had stopped by the piano bar in the restaurant where I had dinner, so I was late getting home. If the guy I was drinking with hadn’t had a wife at home, I might not have come home at all. I sorta drew the line there. Okay I had slipped over it a few times, but I always promised myself not to do it again. I even managed to keep my promise that night.
At home I lay in bed and wondered how sex would have been with the barroom cowboy. I wondered, if he might be the one to force me to go straight. Probably not, but he might have been the one to get me off tonight, I thought. Since that was not to be, I reached into the night stand for my vibrator. I had been tweaking and rotating my nipples while I replayed the evening in my mind. I had reached a point were more was needed, so I applied the vibrator to my clit.
I almost instantly felt the warm slippery feeling as my body lubricated itself. I was preparing myself for the invasion of a cock. Long or short thick or thin my body didn’t care at that moment. It didn’t even care if the cock was plastic. or whether it was on a belt worn by a woman. My body just screamed for something to fill the emptiness.
I wouldn’t have denied myself even if I had the willpower to do so. I quickly slipped the vibrator inside and moved it in and out of my slippery, swollen opening. My body was on the edge of an orgasm, when the knock on my door sounded. I came hard to the demanding sound. I couldn’t stop even when I heard Jen’s husband speak.
“Are you alright Max?”
It took some time before I could answer him. “I’m fine Bob. Sorry if I was too noisy.” I have been told many times that I sounded like an animal rutting.
“Do you have someone in there?”
“No,” I said that pulling on a ratty old robe and moving to the door.
“Why not,” he said with a laugh.
I opened the door. “I found out he was married. Like I told you before, I don’t fuck married men.”
“Or married woman I hope?” he added.
“Not them either,” I replied.
“Well if you are okay, I’ll let you get some sleep.”
Sundays are always a drag for me. That one was no different. I stayed in bed or in front of my small color TV all day. I ate delivery pizza for lunch and left overs for dinner,
Monday I had only one service. The man who got served was a used car dealer. He had ducked service when the sheriff tried earlier. I guess he thought he was going to sell me a car. His wife’s attorney had given me one of his cards, so when I showed it to the salesman, who had pounced on me like a hungry lion, he reluctantly called his boss.
“I got your name from a friend,” I suggested.
“Really, which friend do we have in common?” he asked.
“Your soon to be ex-wife,” I replied as I handed him the court order advising him that she was freezing the family and business assets until there was a hearing. I called his ex wife’s attorney from my car to verify the service. I made an extra ten bucks doing that. It seems once I mentioned the immediate notification everybody wanted it.
I spent the rest of the day watching old TV shows on my laptop at Ed’s office. My little desk space was in the old storeroom just outside of the secure room which held Ed’s records and my valuables.
“Max, my son just spoke with the detectives. It is their opinion that the thugs won’t come back. They did offer to send a car by every hour or so. They said they couldn’t spare an officer to sit around there all day.”
“Yeah, they hear a lot of big talk from little thugs,” I admitted.
“Would you go to the clinic Friday and keep an eye on him.?”
“Sure, if we can work out something on my rent.”
And that’s how I came to be sitting in the rear hallway of the clinic armed to the teeth when they came. First of all they opened the locked door meant for staff only. It had a combination lock and they came right in. Someone had provided them with that combination.
They weren’t expecting me, but I had been more or less expecting them. I got the .30 caliber semiautomatic carbine up before they could get the handguns trained on me. I didn’t bother warning them, I simply shot the one in front twice in the chest. He pretty much body blocked the second one as he tried to raise his pistol. I shot him in the face from about 12 feet. The thirty cal. slug made a god awful mess of his face. As he was going down the third one closed the door behind himself as he ran. I had to step over the two dead men as I pushed through the door using the fire bar to bypass the lock.
I caught thug three as he was trying to open the car door. I hit him with a set of tazer wires from about five feet. He did the St. Vida’s dance for a couple of seconds, then went down in a heap.
Only then did I use my cell phone to call 911. “Yes,” I replied to the operator. “There has been a shooting at the Aster Medical Clinic on Spruce Street.”
“Anyone injured.”
“Three men have been injured.”
“Wait right there,” the operator demanded.
“Got nowhere else to go, so I’ll be here.”
About five minutes till the cops get here, I thought. I turned my attention to the tazered man on the concrete of the parking lot. I kicked him in the ribs. “Wake up sleeping beauty. You are the lucky one. Your friends won’t be waking up at all. You with me?”
He moaned. “Now tell your friends back home that you met the devil, and she’s a woman. Also tell them the clinic and the rest of this town buys their protection from me. One more stranger comes to town, and I will hunt you all down and kill you. I will also kill your wives, your kids, your mommy,your daddy, and your fucking dog. You do believe me don’t you?” I asked it with my foot on his throat. He nodded just as the cops drove into the parking lot.
They did their cop thing, which included questioning me, along with everyone else in the clinic. Since there was already a report on file, concerning the men laying pools of there own blood on the hallway floor, I was pretty sure it would be written up as a justified shooting. They hauled thug three off to jail before I was turned over to the homicide detectives. The detectives did their dance before they cut me loose. I was a little nervous about what might happen next, but I didn’t dare show it. As the final insult the cops took my rifle and tazer into evidence. I still had the DA to deal with. Then I had to tell Jake that someone in the clinic had given the thugs the combination to the rear door.
Since the receptionist was the only one not shaken after the thugs first visit, my money was on her. If she had been nicer to me, I might not have been so sure, but I just had a feeling she was the traitor. It wasn’t my problem, so after I told Ed’s son that he had a trader, I moved on. It was up to him to ferret her out.
As for the DA, he could rubber stamp the justified shooting, or call for a grand jury investigation. Either way I could do nothing to influence him, so I decided to just wait it out.
I was too shook up after the shoot out to take myself to dinner that night. I managed to pick up some Chinese takeout on the way home. I am not a gourmet by any means. Simple fried rice with sweet and sour pork was my idea of Chinese food.
Jen’s husband Bob came knocking on my door around 8 PM. “Jen and I heard on the news about the shootout. Are you okay? I’m sorry that was stupid of course you aren’t okay.”
“Bob, I’m okay.” I said trying to smile.
“Well, we are having drinks. Jen demanded that I come get you.”
“I’m fine, but I can always use a drink.”
We actually had a lot of drinks. I don’t remember which of them suggest strip poker, but we were all pretty drunk at the time. I agreed without hesitation. I still have a pretty good body for an old broad. Belly dancer tummy and all.
The night ended with one hell of a good night kiss from Bob then one from Jen. I left because we were all drunk. It is a lousy idea to let sex come between friends. Especially the kind of sex Bob obviously had in mind.
I hid in my room all day Saturday and again Sunday. Most of the time I refused to answer my phone. I knew who all might be calling and I didn’t want to speak to any of them. Then after 6 PM on Sunday I finally answered a call. I explained how I felt to Jen. Then she told me how she felt, then how Bob felt. None of us felt quite the same, so in the end we decided to do nothing for a while and just see what happened.
Even though I knew that small town cops moved slowly, I was still surprised that it took until the next Monday before I heard that they had called Milton Price’s client in for questioning in his wifes death. According to Milt it had been a pretty aggressive interview. He asked that I stop by his office before lunch on Monday.
“So how about you getting an independent verification of Al’s alibi?” Price asked as soon as I stepped into his phony antique office.
“You might want someone else Mr. Price. I am still being questioned about that shoot out at the clinic. People are going to recognize me. My face is all over the news.”
“Yeah I know. That’s why I want you. The cops and a jury will believe you, when you tell them my client was at the gym, when his wife died. Not to mention people will answer when you ask questions.”
“If he was, and I don’t know that he was, they might believe me. Especially if I get a walk from the cops, and that news makes as big a splash in the media. It would be news, ‘The woman who killed two gang bangers is exonerated’. However, I still won’t know that he didn’t just pay some junkie to do it.”
“I’ll tell you what Stone, we will pay you to do an independent investigation. Your only restriction will be that you don’t volunteer anything. You just tell the truth, when asked. You can’t lie to the cops or to me. If I ask you, or the cops ask you, just tell them whatever you learn.
“I want to be paid in advance. $250 a day and none of that prorated shit. If I work one minute, I get paid for the full day.”
“Fair enough.” Price wrote me a check for five hundred dollars. “Now go talk to the people at the gym and tell me what else you need.”
“I want all his financial records up to date as of today. I mean banks, brokerage, anything from which money can be withdrawn. Warn your client, I can find all of his accounts, so don’t bother trying to hide them. If he has a secret, it is better to fire me, than lie to me.”
From 'The Autobiography of Miss Louisa Harper' ~ "The summer of 1890 was to be the start of my new life. At fifteen years of age, I was to be presented to society and I had expected that I would then be considered an adult. That, at long last, I would have a say in my own life, my own destiny. That was not to be, though. I was still just a doll to be dressed and used as decoration in the home of my powerful parents. I was made up and dressed and used to impress the visitors who came...
It was the year 2001. 15-year-old Newt looked at himself in the mirror. He could see some of his mother Laverne’s African American features looking back, but also blue eyes and a lighter skin tone that must have come from his unknown father. He growled, angry. Why didn’t his mom ever tell him who his father was? Her insistence that she didn’t know didn’t make any sense! She said that Newt didn’t look like who she thought his father was, and she hadn’t been with any blue-eyed white boys. His...
From 'The Autobiography of Miss Louisa Harper' ~ "Langdon Beech-Thorndyke III was 'a catch.' Mother and Father thought that he would be a perfect match for me. He was twenty three and I was fifteen. My parents hoped that we would become betrothed that summer and then a grandiose wedding would follow in three years after I turned eighteen. This was my sister's summer, though. Miranda would be married in August to a Vanderbilt cousin who she barely knew. The opulent affair...
From 'The Autobiography of Miss Louisa Harper' ~ "Beauty comes from pain, Louisa. A proper young woman does not present herself unless she is properly coiffed, properly made-up, properly attired and wearing the proper accoutrements. That, Louisa, is what 'proper' means." Of course, I tried to argue. That is, after all, what an adolescent is supposed to do, but my mother would just purse her lips, shake her head in disgust and repeat that one sentence that she spoke most frequently...
From 'The Autobiography of Miss Louisa Harper of New York and Newport' ~ "The day of Miranda's wedding was cloudy and overcast, so perhaps Aunt Ada had been correct. Perhaps God would not waste a beautiful day on a wedding that would lead to a loveless marriage. Instead of using the vast tents that had been erected on the lawns at Golden Bluffs, everything was moved into our grand ballroom, which was large, but could not accommodate everyone who'd been invited. So, tables were also...
From 'The Autobiography of Miss Louisa Harper' ~ "The week prior to Miranda's wedding was a hectic and crowded one at Golden Bluffs. All of our relations came to Newport for the event and many of them stayed with us. Unfortunately, we also had many friends and business associates staying as well, which did lead to some difficult choices. Father was a self-made man who had family he wanted in attendance, but they were from a lower rung of society. So, since the rooms were assigned to...
Want to get kinky at Fet Life? Never before have fetishes and kinks been as popular as they are today. I don’t know if it is because the invention of the internet has led to a greater level of transparency and communication when it comes to peoples’ deepest sexual desires or if it is because we are just becoming more open and accepting as a society. Or maybe it is something else altogether. Whatever the reason, more and more people are embracing their kinks, and it is a beautiful thing to...
Hookup SitesThe other good thing about flying with PigShit Airlines was that I got to carry a pistol. Actually I carried two pistols and a box opener. I carried the Glock, 10mm ugly automatic, in a belt holster on my ass, and the .38 concealed hammer revolver in my purse. The flat box opener, I carried it in the hip pocket of my well worn jeans. The limo dropped me at the hotel, which was also chosen by our travel agent. I signed the register with Maxine's old signature, even thought I had a dozen more...
By Friday the word at the Downtown Diner was that Marge had disappeared, and the Hazelwood was closed for good.Being closed did not mean that it was for sale.Marge had only leased it, or so the story went.Since she couldn't be found and the owner knew more than he was telling, he was looking for a new tenant after only a week.All that meant almost nothing to me, but it did mean something to the preacher. "Maxine, you know a lot of people around here, how do you think they would react to a...
"So where do we start?" Mike asked. "I guess we start with the person who knows her best," Gwen replied, "That would be Jennifer the lawyer?" Mike asked. "Jennifer is her oldest and dearest friend or so she says, so I guess we start with her." "Can we finish this soon? So we can get out of this crappy motel?" Mike asked. "You are just filled with questions aren't you?" "Now you are doing it, asking questions that is," Mike replied. "Okay, I'll set up the appointment,...
PART 1 Them fuckin’ Armed Services get all the credit, but who gets their asses blown out of the water to get them their crap, for chrissake? Us fuckers in the Merchant Marine, that’s who. Goddamn sub-bait. And then they don’t send nobody to fish us out. Goddamn Krauts. Goddamn war! Cookie bobbed in his lifejacket and watched his ship disappear, a sorry excuse for a vessel, to be sure, but nonetheless, his ship. Sailors deep-six all the time, the risk they signed on for, perhaps. Bad luck,...
"Maxine I am not going to leave you in a lurch," Sylvia said after the others had gone. She and I were sitting alone in the C&D finishing the coffee and cupcakes. For some reason it seemed that I could not get enough sugar recently. I had no idea why that was, but I actually got a craving for sugar. It was even more strange that after I ate something with a lot of sugar, my operating temperature seemed to rise slightly for an hour or so. "I didn't think that you would just walk off....
After the first night I realized we needed an employee. Not necessarily a manager just someone to pick up dirty glasses and bring more ice to a table. One of the customers overheard me talking to Jennifer about it. "Maxine, I have a niece who is looking for work. She came here with just a high school education and not so good English. She is enrolled in your community college. She would love to work here and I promise you will have no trouble at all from her." "Have her come by tomorrow...
"Reggie, if you are wondering what to do next, you should probably kiss me." I said it even though we were standing in the kitchen. The hallway from the back door empties into the kitchen. That's where a lot of my conversations take place, just because of the geography of my Downtown House. Reggie might not have a lot of original thoughts, but he did follow orders well. He move close and kissed me. Even though he had to be ordered, there was a great deal of passion in that kiss. It was...
On Friday night, instead of getting laid, I decided to do the maintenance thing on my body. I cleaned the chutes and ladders as I liked to call the 'I fooled you by drinking coffee and eating donuts system'. That was simply a matter of drinking a glass of baking soda, with a drop of vinegar, mixture. Fortunately it passed over my taste receptor quickly. When I followed it with a large glass of pure water, I would be able to forget all about the taste for at least a month. I let that...
The 8PM Theater Guild meeting got started right on time. Since we lived downtown, Eve and I had walked to the meeting. The first order of business was discussing finances, wasn't it always. Aster was in a unique position for the times. It wasn't broke. Most every other town in the state was dead broke, but not Aster. For one thing Aster had never tried to be all things to all people. The work force was small and they had never offered huge incentives to attract workers. Aster's management...
"Give me your belt and lay across the bed. You know what is going to happen. You have have been a bad boy and need a spanking don't you?" I asked. "Yes Mommy," he said as he handed me the belt. Then he calmly lay across the bed for me. I began by striking him one stiff blow, then I eased off. After the initial pain it was for the illusion more than anything. "Now are you going to be a good boy?" I asked. It was time to set the hook. "Yes Mommy please, I promise I will be a good...
I spent two days watching Sylvia make calls. I would have made them myself, if I weren't trying to bring her into the business. She pared the potential appliance providers down to three. I allowed her to make the decision. She went with one that I might not have, but her reasoning was flawless. All the appliances were pretty much the same. Her supplier had all of them in stock from the water heater to the refrigerator. He would sell in small bulk packages three or four of each at a time. He...
Friday was lost in a battle between the morphine drip and the blinding pain when I moved. The morphine kept me asleep most of the day. First thing Saturday morning things changed. "Maxine, how are you doing," the nurse asked. "Honey, I have slept enough. Cut back on the drugs please," I said it seriously. "Are you sure?" she asked. "I am positive. I need to get more with it, and I need to start now." I informed her. "Let me make a call and see what I can do," she said. "Do it...
I just woke up the next morning knowing that they were going to fix me. There was no announcement and no admission that they had screwed up initially. Nothing like that with a government agency of course. It was just you should show up on Friday and plan to spend the weekend. Yes, I was counting down the five days, but I also had to find Lois in those same five days. Dead or alive she was out there somewhere. First things first, I thought. I needed to interview the people at the Reverend's...
I was totally shocked by how involved I had been with the Irishman. I had to wonder, was it a software change, or was I evolving somehow. It did not matter one bit to me, which it was. The only thing important to me was how wonderful it had felt. I know what a cliche it is. but I had felt really alive during the experience. Maybe I felt that way for the first time, since I died. There I said it. I had died when they took my memories. It was the price I paid for eternal life. It had been so...
"I tried to get in touch with you. You were traveling around Eruope with your new friends." Jen said. 'Ah, don't be jealous. It was a hide out trip that you negotiated with the feds remember?" I asked. "Yes I remember but now you are back and you have two weeks to clear out of the apartment and sign the papers." Jen informed me. "I guess I better get hustling around looking for a new place to live." I suggested. "That would seem to be a good idea," Jen agreed. "So, I have two...
I arrived back home via airplane from DC, then airport taxi service from the airport. I was in the Downtown House about forty five seconds before I unlocked my gun safe and put the .38 shoulder rig on. I felt better with some kind of self defense capability. The fat chick had impressed on me that I was not indestructible by any means. If someone turned me into scrap there was no guarantee they could or would salvage the computer and give me new life. I would be just as dead as the flesh and...
Nobody spoke in the car on the drive back to the Diplomat Lodge. When we arrived, I went directly into the bedroom. I left the two of them to decide their sleeping positions. Then I plugged myself in and waited for any updates. Maxine the party was a huge success, the controller informed me. We are confident that the invitations will begin to roll in. We will sort through them for you, under the guise of the agent assigned to you by the network. You are entitled to an agent, now that you are...
"What do you say to a naked man?" I asked Billy. "Sounds like a country song title to me," he admitted. At the time of that exchange we were sitting on the stainless steel and leather chairs of my dinning set, while we finished the warm up coffee. "You know for a woman your age, your boobs are holding up well," Billy said. "Is that like? You don't sweat much for a fat girl?" I asked. 'I didn't mean it that way at all. I was just marveling at what the doctors can do now. You...
I felt really tired Saturday morning. It was a little bit of sleep deprivation and a little physical exertion. No not Ed, I had been to the Gym to work off some of the week's indulgences before the dinner party. It looked as though all of it together had caught up with me. Ed and his wife were the first to leave. I would have followed shortly thereafter, if it hadn't been my house. Even though I left the mess for the maid, I still had to stay awake until the last of the guests left. One...
I lay down with my plug sticking in the wall for the first hour, then I switched to free electrons for the rest of the night. By doing that I had free fun of the Downtown House. I walked around looking out the window and trying to think how I could give the kids at the community college even more help. Over the years I had hired them whenever I could. I just didn't have anything for the to do at the moment. I really had the resources to find something for them to do, but not everyone would...
MAXINE I smiled as I left Chris at her dad's door. Of course I was not about to let her stop me from seeing Gus. I drove directly from the Evergreens Tower to the hospital five blocks away. At the receptionist desk, I asked, "Could you give me the room number of Gus Gallion please?" "He has been moved from ICU to the cardiac care unit. His room is 5012, he is on restricted visitor list though. It's family only." "I know, I'm his daughter. I was told the visiting hours were...
The flight from Germany passed in a drug haze. I am one of those people who can deal with pain, as long as my mind is on other things. When it is just me and the pain, then I feel it much more intensely. So I was popping the Vicodin like M&M candies. But once I got to New York. there were enough going on to take my mind off the pain. At least enough so that it was manageable. Gwen and I got a cab to a pizza parlor in the Village area. It was fun to watch the kids walking the streets....
Thursday started with me headed off on the bike. I rode my bike to the Sit Down even though I had the ugly red Chevy in the parking space behind my Downtown House. I didn't need exercise, and I wasn't green conscious, I just enjoyed the slower pace of the bike as I carried me through downtown. Pedaling it along was not a problem, not even in the thirty degree temperature. Since Sylvia had arranged a meeting at the bank for me at nine, I ate slowly. Sylvia and Peter Gordon were both in...
The directions, which the Senator's staff provided, led us to a rough paved drive way entrance with a post and beam gate. I knew I was in the right place because there were armed guards, who looked like state police men at the gate. Fortunately there were no magnetometers for us to walk through. It would have been impossible of course, since the car I drove was metal. So was the 410 gauge stainless steel derringer inside my purse. Unfortunately, I would have to leave the pistol inside the...
My name is Greg and I have been dating my college sweetheart, Shelby, since freshman year of undergrad and now coming up on 25. We recently moved in together in a small but cozy 1 bedroom apartment close to the city. Shelby loved being in the city surrounded by people, while I enjoyed my solitude so we settled on the apartment not too far from the city but close enough to make her happy. I've been at my new job for about 4 months and have dedicated a lot of my time to my work, making our sex...
The timing was correct almost to the minute, when the knock came on Cheryl's door. My reaction couldn't have been more inappropriate. "How the fuck did she get through the security gate?' I asked Cheryl. "If you have somehow gotten Kate a key, I am gonna throw your ass out of here." "Shut up and open the door," Cheryl demanded. I looked through the spy hole in the door to see Gwen standing outside. "What the fuck are you playing at now?" I asked, just before I opened the...
After I said my goodbyes, I tried to hide out till the call came from the company's travel agent. I might have managed it, had Jen not called, "Are you really going to sell the apartments?" she demanded. "Yes I am. I didn't have nearly as much fun here as I expected." I replied. "Honey, I know Cheryl broke your heart, but trust me you will find someone, someday," Jen said reassuringly. "Yeah, but if I do, you will probably sleep with him," I said it with a laugh. "True, so you...
Jen had to be lied to just a little. She wanted to make reservations on a commercial airline, but I told her that the Admiral owed me a favor. He didn't of course, but I really did not want her to know that the farmers were our travel agents of record. We were scheduled to fly out Wednesday at noon on one of the company's planes. Since I could never walk through a metal detector or a body scanner. "So, how many airlines do you have a finger in these days," I asked the empty townhouse as...
Just like in my other life the urge to screw just anyone at all passed quickly. Without any 'romance' the animal urge passed easily. Okay that was probably bullshit in the new wrapper and maybe it had been in the old wrapper as well, but it helped me to stay sane. No woman, not even the sluttiest, wants to believe that they are beyond being able to say no to a man. I went into power saving standby mode. I just sat there like a microwave oven which was not being used at the moment. My clock...
We entered the outmost orbit of the Dover System ten hours before the deadline. Har-Hi who stood next to me sighed. “I wished it would have taken longer. This is what I am born for, to be aboard a ship and roam the stars’”. I felt the same way and agreed with him, saying. “Me too.” The doors opened and Wetmouth stepped through, taking her seat behind the small science station at the rear of the bridge. I observed Har Hi who acted as the OPS officer of our little crew dedicating sensors...
“My engorged clit needs to be licked and I want you all to watch. An extra turn on for me,” Maxine told us as she undressed for us. Donald was the first to lick her clitoris as Maxine stood with her back resting on the wall. The other three women were all watching on in awe as Donald teased her by licking just the tip of her clit. “Your huge, hairy clit is magnificent. Just a tease for you before my lady has you while you suck my cock,” Donald told her he stroked his erection. “Your huge,...
"Maxine. we need to meet." The voice on the cell phone belonged to Vlad. "I'm at the house. It's going to take me twenty minutes to meet you anywhere." I explained. "I am at your gate now." "Alright, I'll turn off the alarm. Do you need me to come unlock the gate?" "No, I can get it open," He informed me. "I thought so," I agreed. I had time to pour a cup of coffee before Vlad showed up. I put the shotgun under the bedspread before I let him in. He didn't need to see the...
I had probably experienced jet lag previously, but I honestly didn't remember. I can promise you this, I will never forget the feeling again. My head was buried so far up my ass, I could see my last meal. I took another shower, not so much to wash away the sleep sweat, as to try to clear the cobwebs. "Hey girl," Lamar's voice came from the phone. I had answered it still dressed in my panties and bra. I knew that I was on camera, but I also knew that I had nothing worth flaunting. If...
"So tell me exactly what you won at the awards show?" The man who lived in my second story apartment which was the least expensive of the group. I therefore expected no class at all from him or his wife and I wasn't disappointed. "I didn't win anything, The guy who put the show together one most dramatic reality show. It was a toss up whether it would be life and death or a foot race across the world. Mike won it thank god. If he hadn't won, he would be winning even now." I said...
"So Teneesha, I'm Maxine Stone. Jerry here tells me you are game for most anything?" I asked. "I ain't eatin' no pussy," she said defiantly. She said it in a harsh whisper, since we were sitting at a table in the Cop Out Club. "Tell me why you would even say that?" I asked. "Everybody knows you a stone lezbian," she said in a condescending voice. "I see, so if that bothers you, why did you come down here?" I asked. "Well, Jerry said I would love having a big TV star between...
After the excitement of the fake doctor died down, time passed slowly, but it did pass. I hated every lucid moment of my hospital stay. By Friday the catheter was gone, and only one bag draining into my arm. I finally was able to stay awake long enough to meet with Jerry on Friday night. "So Jerry, what's the word on Beth Ann? You told her, didn't you?" "Yeah, I told her that we knew. She was gone the next morning. I told her the night you got stabbed." "She just left us both the...
When I awoke Sunday morning in the strange bed, it took me a few minutes to remember where I was, as well as how I got there. I had a feeling as if my mouth was wearing an overcoat. I think almost every woman can tell you where that feeling comes from. While I was trying to get my mind to focus, I listened to a male voice speaking a foreign language. That's when I realized I was in Vald's bed, but he wasn't. Vald sat in the small sitting area of the hotel room talking on his cell...
For my part of the agreement with Lucas, I agreed not to speak badly of his company. I further agreed not to enter into any competitive business for that same five year period. I signed immediately after Lucas and we even shook hands. Once Lucas was gone Jen asked, "Have you ever heard of Blackswamp Security company?" "Of course, no one who ever served in Iraq or even Afghanistan could have avoided hearing of them." I replied. "So what is your opinion of them." Jen asked. "It's...
Eve and I left the the fortress, which had once been my downtown office. I no longer had any need for an office. I hadn't hadn't needed it even when I renovated the building Lucas occupied at that moment. The bike ride back to my downtown house was only five minutes. Traffic was light as it almost always was in the downtown. If for some sick reason, one wanted to ride in real traffic, she would be forced to ride to the mall area. There were a few old established neighborhoods around town...
After not getting much information from the estimator, I made a call to Jennifer's office. "Maxine, how good to hear from you," the receptionist said. It was something new for people to check the caller ID and then act as if you were a long lost friend. I found it not just disingenuous but also insulting. "Thanks, did you get me the number for the prison gangster's lawyer?" I asked. "Yes, but I'm not sure Mr. Garcia's lawyer will see you?" she said. "Oh, I bet if I offer to pay...
Besides Eve it's too late for breakfast, but we can ride the bikes to lunch, I said. That is just what we did. Lunch was a Barbecue sandwich at the barbecue pit, as the Gunny had called Keplan's. It wasn't near as far as Helen's which was a good thing since it was apparently going to start raining soon. I didn't mind riding the bike in the slight rain. If I had long hair I might have objected. Long hair requires fancy cuts and styling which go all to hell when wet. In my case the spike...
The families, of the kids involved, just wanted to hang their heads in shame. They had been given a second chance in America and their kids had almost blown it for them. It would take years for the community to change its opinion of the immigrants. Even I wasn't happy with the immigrants at that moment. It had been too hard to get the information. They had chosen to hang together, instead of becoming part of the community at large. It might be understandable, but that didn't mean I forgave...
There was one good thing about that first morning back. I got to wake Jen at 6AM, so that she could get home change and be at her office by 9AM. I made coffee for us both. My sense of taste wasn't refined enough to tell good coffee from terrible coffee, but I did remember how to make it. Like Eve had said the warm liquid was relaxing. I had the increased benefit of remembering how good coffee did taste. Memories was heightened, just because I no longer had the same feelings. Heightened to...
"You are going to need to start looking for a car. Your check has been mailed it should be in your hands by the end of the week." the insurance agent's secretary told me. "Okay well I guess I'll have to take a look around to see what's available." I suggested. "Yes, when the check is delivered we expect the rental car to be returned that same day," she said. "That certainly sounds reasonable enough," I said into the phone. When the call came in, Sylvia was sitting at the...
Sylvia loaded a dress bag and a small black half duffel bag like mine into the trunk. We were on the main road out of town, headed north, by 8pm. I engaged Sylvia in conversation as I drove the big clumsy car in a northerly direction. We spoke about nothing just to fill the air with noise. People often do that it seems. At the first stop for gas Sylvia raided the prepared food cooler which was located inside the convenience store part of the building. When I hit the road again she was...
Nothing happened for the next couple of days, except I slipped back into the second part of my split personality. I went back to being Max the ugly, middle-aged, eccentric chick. I ate at Helen's in the morning, rode my bike around town. Sometimes I went to look at things for Sylvia, and the realty business. It was Friday morning after my walk that Walter made it into town. Walter not only was head of the Green County Savings and Loan, he was also an honorary member of the Swamp Thing team....
This is a true story about the light of my life. She passed away from cancer years ago and I wrote this to remember her. She was an amazing person who left this world a better place. Enjoy. A true story This is a true story about the light of my life. She passed away from cancer years ago and I wrote this to remember her. She was an amazing person who left this world a better place. Enjoy. My wife and I were attending a car show in Newport Beach. It was at the Newporter Inn, a classically...
SwingerSunday would have been one boring day, had it not been for Gus's bike. I took the bike to the park. The park had a designated bike trail. It was not one of those walking tails, which allowed bikes. It was designated just for bikes. I checked with the Tryon Parks and Recreation department before I drove to the access parking lot. I found that Gus's bike qualified as a bike, not a motor vehicle. So I put on my thermals, then made myself a bowl of cereal. First I added about an ounce of...
I try to think out every move to minimize my risk of injury. I know it sounds like I go into things hell bent and stupid, but I actually do consider all my options almost every time. I never considered the big ugly boyfriend option, so I held ice on my cheek and eye. Those were going to be ugly, but the cuts inside my mouth were the most painful. I was pissed at my own stupidity, to mention my lack of planning to allow that jacket to bag over the stun gun holder. I tried to drink coffee by...
I awoke Monday in a strange bed. I also awoke to the smell of bacon and coffee. Eggs don't seem to have an odor, unless they have gone bad. I expected to see Mosby in the kitchen, possibly dressed as a glamorous June Cleaver but alas the kitchen was empty. Well empty of humans anyway, I found coffee in the carafe of the coffee maker. It was also still turned on. I found a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich on a bagel. It was inside of a plastic container with detailed reheating...
I was on my way home, when my jacket pocket began to play that song again. "Hello," I said after I pulled over. "What did you need," Jen asked. She sounded busy. "Can you swing by the jail. I need for you to take a statement from one of the Smiley vics." I replied. "Actually, I'm across the street at the courthouse. I can drop by, before I get in my car, which I was about to do." I knew that it was an imposition, but I didn't really care. She got me into most of this shit, so it...