The Most Fun I Ever Had at a Funeral
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Fuck A Cheerleader Fundraiser Let’s have a “Fuck A Cheerleader Fundraiser.” It was a ridiculous idea to say the least but it certainly got everyone’s attention when I said it during the meeting. The ladies on the committee were appalled and called me a sexist pig…and that was the most polite thing that I had heard. The men laughed but I knew that they all wanted to fuck one of those amazing young ladies as much as I did. Anyway the meeting was a shamble after that and it broke up with...
The F4F Fundraiser Our university has a preschool on campus for the children of our older students and our younger professors. The annual “F4F” Fundraiser covers the expenses and there is no cost for the parents of those children. The “F4F” Fundraiser was started by our Sororities with the financial help of our Fraternities. “F4F” stands for “Fuck For Five.” The full name of the fundraiser is: “Fuck the Sorority Girl, Student, or Professor of your dreams for five hundred dollars…all...
School Fundraiser by Le Chat Author's note: This story was inspired by the drawings of Splyf ("Visitto the Restaurant", "Dolcett Palace", "Westworld",and others). The story was written around Splyf's favourite charactersand was submitted here with his approval. "Welcome to Merle's Bar and Grill! A table for four?" The Malcolmfamily was greeted at the door by a nude waitress. She looked very youngbut, as Brent didn't fail to notice, her slender frame was adorned with a pairof fairly...
PART 1 - FASHIONABLY LATEIt took me longer than I planned to get ready. It took me forty-five minutes to style my newly highlighted hair in the loose curls I wanted to go perfect with my outfit I bought for the occasion: a baby blue Valentina cashmere short sleeve sweater and a white Marc Jacobs pencil skirt to match my six-inch white Louboutin heels.Despite the skirt having a flared hem, the lycra-cotton material hugged my hips and thighs. With every step I took, the skirt pulled taut,...
True?GOOD AFTERNOON, LADIES,? began Sarah Nilsson, speaking with the measured tone of the career politician she wanted to be. The light chit-chat amongst the Student Council representatives subdued into silence, as a dozen pairs of eyes focused on the Council President, ?We have one issue and only one issue today: the pool.? The handful of girls who hadn’t been giving Sarah their full attention immediately did so. ?I have just been informed by Headmaster McGregor that, effective May 15,...
DISCLAIMED - READThis is a work of fiction. None of the events depicted in this story should ever be attempted or recreated in real life, in any degree, for any reason. The legal council stated in this document may not be accurate, and should not be taken for fact. Replication of any of these events may result in fines and/or imprisonment. This work is copywrited by the author, Samsara. Any similarities to any person, place, organization and/or event are purely...
Fundraising AuctionI work in a large company and every year we have a large fundraising event. If you don't have the money to contribute, you can also donate any goods or services. All of the funds go to local charities, so it helps everyone. The event is held at a large hotel, and there is a large silent auction of donated items. There is also plenty of food and drink, although it is a cash bar and the profits go to the different charities.At the time, I was just making ends meet with my...
SpankingTechnology Malfunction A Short Story By Maryanne Peters "Just because technology allows you to do it, doesn't mean you should do it." It was not the first time that Ashton had said the words to his friend Cody, but it seemed like it might just be the last time. He was on the gurney now. The surgery was less than an hour away, and Cody would soon be unconscious as the drugs took effect. "You don't understand," said Cody. "This is what I want. What I've always wanted. To be...
Lucy Hogarth was a leading light in the local Women's Institute and in her own eyes, she was THE leading light. She was good at organizing things but she went way beyond just organizing and became bossy bordering on tyrannical. Some of the other ladies put up with her and tolerated her but a few almost loathed her, virtually none of the members actually liked her.She was aged sixty and her husband was some fourteen years older than her but most of Henry's married life had been spent being told...
SpankingAmong the usual bills and mailshot letters one envelope caught my attention. My name and address on the front side, handmade paper and instead of a sender just the words “Come and enjoy”. I sought for my paper knife. Tearing such an expensive envelope open would be an act of barbarism. Golden letters in fancy type read: “Are you looking for high class entertainment? Are you fed up with the impersonal and boring services of the run-of-the-mill night clubs? Mr. Martin B. is cordially invited to...
Group SexFundraiser: Glamour Shots By Karen Hansen Darren was still struggling with the ropes around his wrists which held his arms above his head when a stunningly beautiful Japanese woman walked over to the platform he was kneeling on and stood before him. As she looked over his body, he could see the excitement on her face as plan as day. Any other time and place, he would be thinking this was his lucky day and he knew a good time was ahead. But now... in the state he was in... this was...
WE attended two funeral services together, Mary and I, one low key in terms of attendance but deeply emotional, on one morning and followed that by another higher profile one the following afternoon, that was more for public show than anything else. Mary insisted I attend by her side for both funerals. How could I deny her my full support at them both? To be honest, I wanted to spend every moment of our shrinking allotment of time we had together. Mary wore the same black outfit for both...
I had flown half way across the country to see my lover. We had not been together in three years; each home with our respective primary partners. Our relationship was open. It was very sexual. When one of us arrived and we were initially together, G was normally a little nervous. Once in our room, we would take our clothes off. We would hug and kiss reasonably briefly, and with a little sexual touch, I would be quite aroused. G would relax as my cock entered her and we would have a...
Impregnation game using a funnelIt is just so very slutty to get impregnated from a funnel, especially with multiple guys contributing sperm. I love the videos our avid members have found and contributed. I hope there are more posts and videos coming.A SEXY PREG RISK GAMEWhat I think would be sexy is a game at a swingers club or at a breeding party.Everyone signs waivers saying no one else will be held responsible for any results and it is fully consensual. STD test results can be exchanged or...
”Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to our marathon charity show for the victims of the dreadful earthquakes in Nepal.”Paul Sumner, late night talk show host, newspaper columnist and stinking rich philanthropist, was hosting a huge televised charity event being beamed to millions of homes worldwide."Everyone has seen the shocking images and heard the heartbreaking reports, and tonight we,” — and he pointed directly at the camera — “that is you at home and those of us here in the studio, are going...
ExhibitionismFundraiser A drabble by Karen Hansen The gavel fell, then clapping... Lance, now Lynnette, stepped carefully down the stairs. Cuffed, he couldn't catch himself... led past the people... "How wonderful 'she' looked enfemme..." "What a 'nice' gesture..." Lance couldn't see the last bidder. Mistress whispered, "See you in 48 hours." Winking. It couldn't be too bad... different Mistress... new chores... it's what Mistress wanted... to help out the...
This time I waggle my wide hips enticingly, guessing the new and old sperm is dribbling in strings from my lippy orifice, I call out, “Who’s next?”Rapid footsteps, hands on my buttocks, as a person behind me kneels quickly, and then one hand shifts to my hip, the other goes to help proffer another hard cock to the entrance of my breeding box. There’s heavy breathing above me, it’s either the young man, or ‘Van Driver’ back for seconds, I don’t care though, this is what my sexual dysfunction is...
I’m 58, I’ve gotten fat from eating way too much chocolate way, there’s no doubt in my mind, that the way to a GILF’s cunt is with chocolates and cake.Men have fantasies about older women, complicated unrealities, and they think that a mature woman wants to fuck the same as she did in her teens, most do not! Most older women will have gone through menopause by fifty-five and have lost their sex drive and are therefore content to let their husbands or partners fuck them on their backs...
One Wednesday evening, as I was sitting at the bar in a coastal city that renowned for its humidity, I was enjoying the balmy atmosphere as I sipped on a beer. I was very happy that a colleague had recommended this ‘arty’ area to me.The guest lodge I was staying in was charming, and all the shops and restaurants in Roper Road, as the area was referred to, had a lovely vibe. Of course, of special interest to me was the gay flag that I had observed hanging from the first floor of one of buildings...
Gay MaleMalfunction The 3 laws of Robotics: 1. A robot cannot harm a human being, or through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm 2. A robot must obey the commands of a human being, except where such commands would counter Law 1 3. A robot must protect its own existence, except where such protection would counter Law 1 or Law 2. Matt, the engineer assigned to fix me calls me Abe. That's when he isn't using profanity. My official designation is ABEVE - 2110...
Helen and her stepdaughter were thrust into a shabby room on the second floor of the old farmhouse. It was furnished with a king-size bed a small chest of drawers and little else. There was an adjoining closet with an old-fashioned flush toilet and washbasin. A barred window, in the wall opposite the bed, overlooked the back yard. Katrina, naked but for a pair of cotton socks, was trembling with cold and shock. She was sobbing uncontrollably. Her thighs were smeared with evidence of her...
It was now Jeff's...or as he would be known to his students as, Mr. Winger's second day of teaching. Even though Greendale was a rundown, fairly crappy joke of a community college, Jeff had to admit it had done a lot for him. Not only was he able to complete his bachelor's degree and able to actually become a lawyer, he had also gained a core group of friends that made him a much better person. Greendale wasn't done with the tall, good-looking man just yet though. After a failed attempt at...
Die St?ckelschuhe Episode 1 - Gesucht und gefunden! © 2003 / 2017 Lydia Lighthouse Es geschah an einem Fr?hlingstag, so wie man ihn sich am meisten w?nscht. Die Sonne schien und es war angenehm warm. Zwar lie? eine k?hle Briese hin und wieder sp?ren, dass es bis zum Sommer noch ein wenig hin war, aber dennoch wurde es zu einem der sch?nsten Tage seit Monaten. Einen Tag, auf den die sonnenausgehungerten Menschen nur gewartet hatten - und das an einem Wochenende. Folglich lie? sich ...
Earth date 1st April, 2121. Time 12h03m56s GMT. Space Station Alpha 69. Geostationary above Mars. Unmanned. Nothing to report. All systems functioning.*Earth date 2nd April, 2121. Time 15h05m23s GMT. Space Station Alpha 69. Geostationary above Mars. Unmanned. Nothing to report. All systems functioning.*Earth date 3rd April, 2121. Time 10h23m19s GMT. Space Station Alpha 69. Geostationary above Mars. Unmanned. Nothing to report. All systems functioning.*Earth date 4th April, 2121. Time 16h02m45s...
Fantasy & Sci-FiThanksgiving 1982 It was decided that we would have our first band practice the second Friday after Thanksgiving break at the home of Inez's uncle and aunt. This would give Inez a couple of extra weeks to recover fully. We'd ease back into it slowly, perhaps having a couple more practices before Christmas. Of course, we all had final exams to wade through as well, except, of course, Eileen. We'd try to get together over winter break a couple of times, and then hit the ground running as...
The Fundraiser Part One Note: This story does have sex…it just comes near the end. No one under 18 involved. Every January for the past 15 years I have blocked out the fourth weekend of July to participate in a two hundred mile bike ride to raise money for medical research. Starting at one end of the state and ending at the other, thousands of spandex clad men and women of all ages, shapes and sizes come from all over the country to further the cause. The event has been going on for almost...
I had to raise money for my school track team by selling candy bars. I was crafty and had the perfect sales pitch for every crowd to would show it to. The parks for the sugar hungry k**s after school, and other places i had up my sleeve that other team mates wouldnt think to try. My sales were going excellent and i had almost sold all of my chocolate bars, however, 23 boxes remained. I went to the police station and the fire house, gave a sweet lil sales pitch and sold 8 of the 23 boxes. I had...
The Fundraiser Part One Note: This story does have sex…it just comes near the end. No one under 18 involved. Every January for the past 15 years I have blocked out the fourth weekend of July to participate in a two hundred mile bike ride to raise money for medical research. Starting at one end of the state and ending at the other, thousands of spandex clad men and women of all ages, shapes and sizes come from all over the country to further the cause. The event has been going on for almost...
Straight Sex(This story isn’t true, but it’s based on some real events. I just put them together.) Tottenham Court Road on a busy Friday lunchtime is not the tine to start playing Frogger for real but the young woman in front of me obviously didn’t realise that. I was moving before my conscious brain kicked into gear, my hand shooting out and yanking her back by her shoulder as the taxi swerved to avoid a bike courier weaving in and out of traffic. It happened in slow motion, the taxi screeching into the...
Weddings and funerals are the only time our whole family gets together. It is like a reunion. I mean they come from all over, the extended family from both sides. So this story takes place at a wedding, I can't remember who got married but I remember the important parts. My family arrived several days early as did most everyone. The first day we all went to the golf course and drank. Uncle Carl and Aunt Beth were ready to go and made me the designated driver. I loved being around Uncle Carl and...
Shadowsblade a Whateley Tale: Written by Shadowsblade Created for war and forged in pain, dealing with demons within and without. In this part, Rohanna lays parts of her past to rest and more will come in the chapters that follow. This one chapter only contains one of the four funerals that come in her life, so suddenly and all at that same time! I hope that my readers love this part? I seem to have lost some of you with the last 2 postings? for some reason? To all my readers,...
After that, I left the podium and exited out a side door. There wasn’t going to be any schmoozing in the aisles tonight. Once outside the chamber, I sent somebody in to find the Commandant of the Marine Corps and ask him to see me for a minute or two. I smiled as I considered that. Once upon a time if a senior officer ‘asked’ me to do something, it was really an order. Now I was the one doing the asking. My, how Second Lieutenant Buckman had grown up. Marilyn and the kids showed up about a...
Going back in time to my first ever time in bed with two men, it was my then boyfriend Adrian, who later became my husband, and his friend Allan. There’s not so much to the tale to be honest. The advent of the pill being commonly available to women in the seventies, had changed a lot of young women’s ideas about virginity, and keeping yourself for you husband was now outmoded, luckily for me. Of course, if you let a few guys take you out, and then let them into your panties, then you would be...
Probability Dysfunction AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is a little story I wrote for the Machine Malfunction Contest in the TF-TG-Contests group on deviantart. I didn't win, but it was a lot of fun to write and I'm happy with how it came out. *** I grip the vertical and lateral function knobs as I work to keep the indicator in the green zone. I haven't operated the plasma input on this early prototype in years, so I'm glad that I'm still a ninja at this. I just hope the directors at...
hello, hey, hi, … hello. hey. hi. how are, or is you all, y'all, or you's being among yourselves doing, huh? I feel kind of crappy, or pissy I guess, well at least I am not thinking about possibly jumping into a body of water other than to try to do some, or such swimming, if you know what I mean, read between the lines, fill in the blanks, & in times like these we need a Savior, … & what better Savior than our Lord, & Savior, the Christ, the Messiah-Deliverer? you know, but then...
By Dina PetroI was so young, in my teens when I participated as a cheerleader in one of our local soccer teams, My Name is Tala, I was an active girl in the team, participating in most of the activities including extra activities of the team outside games and playing times when we were cheering the team players.The board members have decided that the team needs some fundraising from our town, so they took a decision to start raising funds in any way we all could, a woman board member, Sally,...
My husband had just left for work, the sun was breaking through the bedroom curtains. I was feeling particularly horny, and so could not resist slipping my hand down to feel the smooth contours of my recently shaved mound. As usual my mind flashed through my most memorable sexy experiences, finally reliving a thrilling experience that happened on the day that my husband Dave, had arrange for a guy to pick up a heavy cold frame that he had sold on EBay. The weather had been hot and having...
ExhibitionismA Car sudden MalfunctionBy Dina PetroIt was a nice summer evening; driving on the beach road, just cruising and having nice time, enjoying the lovely weather, a perfect warm day, neither too hot, nor too cold. The car did not sound normal, I was getting a buzzer with red light on my LCD screen, finally the car stopped and the engine went off.I have no idea about car mechanics; I called a close friend, who told me to check the water level under the hood. Right after I lifted the hood to check...
A Car sudden Malfunction By Dina Petro It was a nice summer evening; driving on the beach road, just cruising and having nice time, enjoying the lovely weather, a perfect warm… [email protected]
Sex With StrangerI wheeled my patient from the cooler in to my "work room."She was a 74 year old female who had died of natural causes. I had three days to prepare her so that the family could have a viewing before committing her to a plot next to her predeceased husband. She was joining him after a separation of almost 10 years. I had plenty of time to do my usual excellent job. I am a very skilled undertaker. I, Thomas Steel, didn't start out life wanting to embalm corpses. I graduated from my high...
By Ken Haramiru Check my blog at http://haramiru.wordpress.com/ to find both my free and commercial erotica. And follow me on Twitter at @haramiru for more! A note on this story: Everything up until “My prayers weren’t answered” actually happened. Afterwards, I couldn’t wait to get home and write a story about what could’ve been. Today, I just got back from attending my ex-girlfriend Lois’s father’s funeral. He had lived a full life, and as a Catholic he’d had a large family. Most of...
Shopping Spree Refund – The Payback Several weeks after he had hired Brooke, Will heard nothing but rave reviews from her immediate supervisor. At first he thought it might be because she was putting out but since her supervisor was a female and a little on the hefty side, he dismissed that possibility. But then he started hearing rumors from people in several departments that she was doing well. She was hired as the receptionist in the main lobby but had been promoted and was now secretary...
Shopping Spree Refund – The Payback Several weeks after he had hired Brooke, Will heard nothing but rave reviews from her immediate supervisor. At first he thought it might be because she was putting out but since her supervisor was a female and a little on the hefty side, he dismissed that possibility. But then he started hearing rumors from people in several departments that she was doing well. She was hired as the receptionist in the main lobby but had been promoted and was now secretary...
Quickie SexBIOCHEMISTRY 4: THE FUNERAL By JRD Sam and James were at the mansion of Elaine having a simple get together. This was one of the things that Sam liked so much about being with Elaine. Despite all the trappings of wealth that Elaine had, she was really just a simple girl at heart. Many of the "wealthy elite" that Sam had to deal with maintained a rigid "air of civility", a wall of class distinction, between themselves and their servants, but Elaine was really just one of the...
The long miles evaporated into scenes in my rear view mirror. Ahead, more miles appeared. I knew where I was headed having made the trip many times, however, this time the trip was to see my only sibling for what was the last time. My premonition was correct. She had a catastrophic relapse shortly afterward and died quickly. Cancer is the great killer that took her, and our parents. I remained the last member of my nuclear family and cancer free. What were the markers that separated me from...
I love being an intern. I really do. There is so much to learn and experience, and the perks are amazing. For the past two years, I had the pleasure (quite literally) of doing my internship at a funeral home in my hometown. My ambition is to be a funeral director and there is no better place to get hands on experience than working in funeral home. My boss and mentor is the Funeral Director. He is a 35 year old man of Japanese descent. His name is Kyle and he took over “the biz” from his...
Quickie SexEvery eye in the place turned to look at us when we walked in. Every male eye anyway and they weren't really looking at us; they were looking at Becky. Understandable. Five seven, long brown hair down to the middle of her back, the face of an Angel and a body designed to drive men crazy. It was all real too. Not even a tenth of an ounce of plastic or silicone in that 36 x 22 x 34 package. I could see the speculation on their faces. Older sister? Cousin? One or two might even be thinking a...
Introduction: Transgendered story where a man at a funeral home gains a strange power to be the dead A funeral home is a place for death, but in a small town outside Richmond, until one Friday night. The phone rang at a little past two and he knew what it meant. Someone was dead. He took the information and thanked god that he didnt have to go to a house tonight. He sat up and looked at his wife, got out of bed and slipped his suit on. He woke up once he got to the funeral home, brewed a cup of...
During the morning break, at school, Monday morning, I get paged to the office. I can tell something is up by the way the secretaries are looking at me. One of the counsellors takes me to his office and informs me that Gran is dead. I phone Zlata and tell her to take the day off to be with Sam and Grandpa. I am a bit of a dick; in that, I refuse to go home and stay in school for the day. I know how emotional my family gets and do not want to deal with it while I am dealing with the loss of...
At approx 7PM; I finished work and headed home. Pam would most likely be there and working on dinner. Her car was in the garage as I pulled mine in. I went in through the kitchen door and was surprised to see that she was wasn't in the kitchen. No answer when I called her name. I went through the house searching until I reached our bedroom at the other end. Still no Pam. I decided to check the adjoining bathroom. My search for my wife ended there. Pam was sitting slumped forward on the toilet...
I was going to be going into the city on the morning of her funeral (which was scheduled for 11 AM. I arrived at the funeral home at 8:45 and located the viewing room where she was still on display. As I walked into the room; I could see her lying in repose in her casket at the front of the room. I was not disappointed as I came close enough to really see her. Cindy was clad in a midnight blue dress with an embroidered bodice. She had a deep dark tan on all of her that I could view (face,...
Introduction: Authors Note: The story you are about to read is fantasy fiction. The events never happened and are only a product of my sometimes vivid imagination. It was a typical Friday morning at our home. My wife and I were getting ready for work. My 42 year old wife Pamela looked particularly sexy this morning as she was applying her makeup. She was dressed in a gray wool blend suit with a skirt just above the knees, light suntan thigh-hi stockings and a dark plum blouse. Black high heel...
Foreword A note on this story: Everything up until you see the line "My prayers weren't answered" actually happened, and yes she was pretty much dressed like the girl on the cover. Once I left the reception, I couldn't wait to get home and write a story about what could've happened. Chapter 1: The Funeral Today, I just got back from attending my ex-girlfriend Lois's father's funeral. He had lived a full life, and as a Catholic he'd had a large family. Most of the women in his...
Hey all this is rake (obviously Nick name) and it’s my first story though am reading ISS for any years. Am 24 and have strong 6 inch dock,though am good at looks never had chance to fuck because of my shyness and awkward feeling. Finally I had a chance which came in my way in 2014 , A other state girl joined in my offs and I had to act as a caretaker. Let her name be keerthi very fair nice shape but assets are so less …. normal ass and very small boobs but man such a active soul and flexible....
Tabletop Funniest Games: Cursed Thieves By La Bruja Mutante After a few seconds more than it should, the intro finished and the music started fading away. A smiling face appeared in front of the fixed camera, looking directly to it. Behind it, a happy bearded face, framed by messy brown hair welcomed the viewer. "Hi there, TFPlayers!" said the smile. "Welcome once again to our video channel! Where we unbox, play, review and vivisect the tabletop games no one dares to! I'm your...
“Hey, baby,” sniffled Linda Perkins.“Hey, mom! I missed your calls. I was seeing patients,” Rochelle explained.“It’s okay. I was just calling to tell you G-momma passed away in the nursing home last night.”“Oh my god! I’m so sorry, mama!”The older woman sobbed, “Thank you! I’m workin’ on the arrangements with Paul and Dianne. I’ll let you know when the service is gonna be.”“Okay! Take your time. Is Clarence around,” she inquired about her mother’s husband.“He’s mowing the lawn.”“Alright. I need...
My wife is of Indian descent; 34 years old; athletic body with boobs that accommodate her good looks. Short black shoulder length hair; which now is in a boy’s cut; average height and a killer smile. I on the other hand frequent the gym; so at the age of 39 my body still seems to be in good shape. I am bald headed; well built and of average height. Her sister is short; chest height; with shoulder length hair; well built legs (anyone would want to wrap those legs around their head). Nice...
I half opened one eye, "What are you.....", Sara stopped at the end of my bed. As my eyes tried to focus in the light, I could see her blurry figure. It was a slender figure with long legs. She may be two years younger than me, but she got the height in the family. Many because of those long thin California tan legs of hers. My eyes focused in on her smiling face, which was over half covered with her long blonde hair. She had what I thought at first was just a bra on, but realized that she...