Disclaimer
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Disclaimer 2, The Producer free porn video
Authors' note:
This is my 1st sequel. I got so many nice comment about the first story,
I decided to try it again. I'm not sure if this is a unique enough
subject or deep enough, to justify its own universe. If any readers
have an opinion on that, please write a review or send me an e-mail.
Thanks to all the readers who have written any review for my stories or
those of other author's. An honest review that points out problems in a
story is just as welcome a one that praises.
James Lawson was depressed. He was a Hollywood movie producer. He used
to be successful and sought after, not anymore. (He suspected the remake
of "Ishtar" he put out two years ago was one reason.) He had just seen
the dailies for his current film and they sucked. He hadn't had a
successful project in two years. He was burned out, middle aged and
alone. It was harder and harder to find willing women to come to his
bed, without paying for them. Making movies wasn't fun anymore. He
wanted a change in his life, but didn't know what.
James was walking down the street when he saw a flash of light and an
old-fashioned brass lamp appeared. It looked just like Aladdin's magic
lamp. The flash of light made James think he had walked into someone's
"on location" set. He looked around for cameras and a crew but saw none.
Lots' of independent movie makers' were running around trying to
duplicate the success of Tarrantino's "Pulp Fiction." (James had been
offered that movie, but he passed on it. He had known Tarrantino when he
was a video store clerk and figured it would be a bust. Who knew?)
Now-a-days, it was hard to walk anywhere and not see someone filming in
the street. Many of them didn't have permits and were doing what some
people called, `drive by filming'. Pick a corner, take a couple of shots
and head for a new location. James stumbled onto a film crew in the
street about twice a month.
James couldn't find anyone who looked like they were shooting a movie.
He felt the lamp and discovered it was real brass, not a cheap prop. It
also looked very old. James liked things like the lamp so he decided to
take it home and clean it up.
James ran water over the lamp to remove the dirt and then began drying
it off with a towel. A plume of smoke came out of the wick hole and
suddenly a man was standing in James's living room.
The newcomer was dressed in a tuxedo. He had a plaid ribbon pinned to
his lapel. James didn't know what a plaid ribbon represented support
for, maybe everything? The man was about 40 with thinning hair and a
good tan. He looked slightly upset.
"Thank you for freeing me from the lamp, oh great master." The man said,
"How may I reward your kindness?"
James began looking around his living room, lifting books and chair
cushions.
The man in the tux sighed, "Don't tell me your looking for a camera
because you think this is some kind of joke or some stupid TV show."
James shook his head, "I `m looking for my pistol. Who the hell are you
and what do you want?"
"Don't pull a gun," the man said hastily, "I'm not a criminal, or a
lawyer."
"Isn't that redundant?" said James.
"I'm a wizard," he continued, "my name is Fred. I'm required to grant
you one wish for freeing me from the lamp. Now, if you don't mind, I was
about to leave on a date. The limo will be to my place any minute and I
need to get going. Can we get the wish out of the way so I can leave?"
"Didn't you just tell me that you live in the lamp?" James asked him,
"Who do you date when you live in a lamp?"
"I don't really live in the lamp," Fred replied, "I just have to say
that as part of the spell. I lost a bet to another wizard. For the next
few months, anytime someone rubs the lamp, I get jerked away from
whatever I was doing and have to go grant a wish. Actually, I write
screenplays for a living. I happen to be dating a woman whose name you
would recognize if I was crass enough to brag about my dates. She's a
successful actress. But really, I do have a time problem here, can we
hurry up?" Fred was tapping his foot on the floor.
"What bet did you lose?" James asked.
"The Super Bowl." Fred told him.
James snorted, "You took Atlanta? You deserved to lose."
Fred was losing his temper, he wasn't allowed to attack the wish maker,
but he had ways of getting even.
James looked at Fred closely.
"Wait a minute. I know you!" James exclaimed, "You pitched a script
to me several years ago. Wasn't it a remake of `Goodbye Charlie'? I
remember passing on it. Do you remember that?"
Fred showed his teeth. He wasn't grinning. He remembered as soon as he
popped into this guy's living room.
"I remember you read the outline and threw it down on the desk. You told
me you might produce the film but you had to check on something first.
Then you walked out on your balcony and looked up in the air. You walked
back into the room and said";
"Sorry Fred, pigs still can't fly. When they can, come see me again."
James laughed at his bad joke. "Well, I see so much bad writing come
across my desk, I have to come up with new ways to reject it, you know?"
Fred nodded, "I guess you were fresh out of clever witticisms when that
hack pitched you the remake of `Ishtar', huh? Didn't that movie cost
less than the original but managed to lose more money?"
James stopped laughing. "What was it you said about getting one wish? I
thought genies granted three wishes?"
"I'm not a genie," Fred said, "I`m a wizard. You get one wish, anything
you want except it can't cause death to any human being."
"Why write for a living if you're a wizard?" James asked him, "why not
use your power to make yourself rich?"
Fred shook his head, "It doesn't work that way. I can't use spells to
affect myself. If I could, I'd have more hair." He said, pointing to his
balding pate.
"So I can't wish you to turn into something else, like a writer with
talent, huh?" James said with a snicker.
Fred didn't answer, he knew he would have the last laugh.
James looked thoughtful, "One wish," he thought, "anything he wanted.
This definitely has possibilities."
"Okay," James finally said, "here is my wish . . . "
Fred held up his hand like a traffic cop. "Hold on, wait, I have to
read the disclaimer."
"A disclaimer, for a wish?" James said.
"California courts," Fred explained, "what can you do? Now listen
carefully, ahem . . ."
" In consideration of your act of kindness in freeing Fred the Wizard
from the lamp, you have been granted one wish. This wish may take any
form except that which will or may cause death to another human being.
You as the wisher are responsible for the wording of the wish. Any
ambiguity in the phrasing of said wish may result in a less than
satisfactory outcome of your wish. An attention to detail is cautioned
as wishes may not be canceled, revoked, changed or modified in any way
once the wish has been granted. Void where prohibited. "
"Any questions?"
"So," James asked, "if I don't word the wish for exactly what I want,
it's my fault, is that it?"
"I can't add anything to the disclaimer. I will reread it if you want,
but no interpretations. You may wish to consult an attorney."
James figured it really was some joke by one of his friends. They set
this up using special effects. He just didn't want to make a fool of
himself by wishing for something they could blackmail him with like
wishing for a 14-year-old girl or a bigger penis.
"Okay," James said, "I'm tired of being a producer. I want to be younger
and a movie star. I don't have to be a big star but one that is actively
making movies. I want to be single but I want a cute, blonde girl friend
with a good body to keep me satisfied. Being a producer just doesn't get
you as much sex as it used to, you know? Used to be, you promise a girl
a part, she puts out, maybe she gets a part, maybe not, who cared. Now,
they sue your butt off for that type thing. As a movie star, it would
have to be easier getting girls, you know? Oh yeah, none of them girly
boys?"
Fred couldn't believe his luck. This insufferable prick had left him an
opening he could drive a truck through. He almost started laughing out
loud. He didn't though because James could stop the wish before Fred
granted it. Once granted, it was forever. (See disclaimer.)
Fred didn't have to wave his arms, he just had to repeat certain words
to himself and direct the spell toward James.
Everything went black for James. When he could see again, he was lying
in bed. The morning sun was coming in through the French doors on the
balcony. He was in a large bed covered with a flowered bedspread. He
moved his head to the right and saw a woman laying there, her back to
James. James could smell her perfume. He reached out to touch the shiny
blonde hair laying on the pillow by his new girlfriend's head. It was
soft and fine.
The girl must have felt the touch or James shift in bed because she
rolled over and smiled at him. She was beautiful. He recognized her, but
couldn't place her right off.
The young woman smiled and said, "Good morning sleepy head, I thought
you were going to sleep the day away."
James smiled back, and reached out to the woman, beneath the covers,
until he found her breast. He caressed it and felt the nipple rise up.
The woman sighed and she too reached out to James and caressed his . . .
breast!
James jumped as though shocked. SHE suddenly remembered who the girl
was. She was an actress named Anne Heche, the Significant Other of . . .
Anne looked concerned, "Is something wrong, Ellen?"She asked.
Fred took his date home and they spent the night together. The next day,
he dusted off the script for the remake of `Goodbye Charlie', it was
being released to video soon, maybe the timing was right.
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