The Adventures of Joanna and John ? by: Joanna Maguire.
This is a true story first starting when I was about 8 years old I can
remember most of the incident clearly. Years later when my mother passed
on, amongst her things was a black and white photograph of myself in a
white frilly dress with the girl called Ann who was dressed similarly,
both of us holding dolls in a garden setting. I do not remember the
photograph being taken. But my father was always taking pictures with his
box brownie camera.
The rest of the story is also true but maybe a little out of context and
abbreviated but not exaggerated from my point of view or memory Johnny
was a quiet, meek little boy in second class. He never got into any
trouble at school. Though the toughies of the school bullied, harassed
and laughed at his weakness. However one day he upset the science teacher
for a reason he never worked out. Maybe the teacher was having a bad day
and picked on the first pupil he saw when he looked up from his notes. -
"Come out here in front of the class," ordered the teacher. Johnny rose
from his front desk puzzled. "Hold out your right hand demanded," the
teacher.
He now knew what was going to happen. Johnny had never felt the bite of
the cane in his life, The teacher pick up the dreaded cane from under his
dustcoat. John held his hand out apprehensively. Wack! Wack! Wack! The
cane descended on his hand so quickly he had no time to react. The pain
was excruciating. His hand hurt terribly and felt hot and stung. The pain
was almost unbearable. "The left hand now," ordered the teacher. This was
too much. Johnny had done nothing wrong. The pain in his right was still
stinging. It was too much. Johnny ran from the class out into the
playground and out the school gate.
It was before lunchtime so he could not just go home yet. Johnny wandered
the streets for a while and then went into the park and played on the
swing and slippery dip for an hour. He was hungry, but her had left his
packed lunch at school. Feeling in his packet he found a dollar in
change. Just enough to buy a salad roll. He was thirsty too. But there
was a water bubbler in the park, so after purchasing his bread roll he
went back to eat it and wash it down with some warm water out of the
bubbler.
The day wore on. After spending all his pocket money, there was no money
to pay his bus fare home. It was a ten-mile walk so he set out arriving
home at the normal time he usually arrived home from school. But his
mother was waiting for him. "The head master phoned me and told me you
had run away from being punished for mucking around in class."
Johnny mumbled in reply, "I did nothing, the cane hurt so much, and my
hand is still sore. His mother looked at the hand still red from the
punishment.
"You are a wimp a wimp and a sissy. Wait till your father comes home and
gives you belting."
After five his father came home. Hearing what had happened, his father
took off his belt, grabed Johnny by the arm, put him over his knee pulled
his school pants down and put him over his knee. Johnny wriggled and
screamed. His mother came over and held him by the legs so he could not
move as his father strapped his bare bottom.
*This is worse than the cane,* he thought as the cane descended again and
again for what seemed ever. He lost count of the number of strokes. His
bottom was on fire. Eventually it came to and end. Johnny fell onto the
cold floor.
"Get to bed now," His mother ordered, "No dinner for you tonight and
don't think this is the end."
Johnny crawled away to his bedroom his bum still on fire. He bent over,
looking at the reflection in the bedroom dressing able mirror. His behind
was swollen red. It took a long time for him to go to sleep that Friday
night. Johnny's father worked on Saturday so when he awoke his father had
gone to work. He was hungry has hell so he went to the kitchen straight
away. In his pajamas. Mother was already there and his plate of corn
flakes was waiting. He ate it all quickly followed by a glass of orange
juice.
"Give me your pajamas," his mother demanded. Thinking they were going to
be washed he striped them off, handing them now naked to his mother. "I
have some fresh clothes in my bedroom. Come," she smiled.
He went into his parent's room looking for his clean shorts and shirt he
wore on weekends. He could not seem them anywhere. He looked on the bed;
spread out there was a girls white frilly dress. And panties. "Put them
on," his mother demanded. "I told you last night I was not finished with
you."
"I can't put those on," Johnny sobbed.
"Do it now. This is what happens to weak sissy boys who run away from
school. The strap again if you don't."
He reluctantly pulled the dress on over his head knowing he had no
choice, He felt ridiculous.
"The panties now." He put his feet into the silken panties and drew them
up. He needed to lift the dress to get them up to his waist. His mother
produced a pair of white stockings, handed them to him. "Put these on."
With some difficulty with further reluctance he put each stocking pulling
them up each leg separately, fastening them to the stocking suspenders
attached to the lacy white panties. His mother produced a pair of girls
white shoes. He put them on without arguing.
"Over here," his mother again demanded. She brushed out his curly longish
hair; it had been a while since his father had taken him to the barbers.
Satisfied with my reactions and obedience, she smiled. His mother then
opened a drawer in her dressing table, Got out a white ribbon tying it in
a bow on the top of his head. "Mmm! Not quite finished yet," said his
mother reaching for a tube of lipstick from her make up collection, and
then quickly applied some to John's lips. He really felt like a sissy
now. "You make a pretty girl. Didn't want a baby boy, but you will do
now. Wait in the Kitchen while I get dressed and don't move from there."
He went out into the kitchen the frills on the bottom tickling his
stocking clad legs. He sat on a chair waiting. Half an hour later his
mother came out dressed in her going out clothing.
"We are going shopping," she said to Johnny." Can't call you Johnny now.
I think I will call you Catherine after your Aunt. Grabbing him by the
hand she pulled him out the door into the daylight up the from path, into
the street. He was now terrified. What if some of his schoolmates saw him
like this. That would be then end. He would never ever go back to school
if he were recognized. They walked up the hill towards the town shops.
He began sweating, in fear. A group of old ladies was standing on the
pavement as they passed. His dress began ruffling in the wind making his
stocking legs feel cooler. One of them he recognized as Mrs. Menzies
suddenly stopped talking and turned towards his mother.
"I did not know you had such a pretty girl child, such lovely curly hair.
I always thought that curly hair was wasted on your boy."
"Catherine gets it from her fathers side of the family do think it is
quite nice myself. Don't you Catherine?" his mother replied she/he was
too frightened to speak and just trembled. "She is a bit shy."
Mrs. Menzies then suggested that Catherine should come and play with her
daughter Anne sometime. "How about tomorrow after church?"
"Yes that will be good. We accept your kind offer," his mother replied.
Then walked on towards the shopping center. No one seemed to notice as
Catherine pushed the shopping trolley about the grocery store. After
paying for the groceries Catherine's mother said she would pick them up
later when my husband finishes work. "Lets have lunch. If you are a good
girl you can have an ice cream."
Catherine was lead to a nearby Greek caf?/milk bar where her mother
ordered a salad for them both followed by a pot of teacake and icecream,
Catherine's mother took ages to eat her salad and drink her tea. When
suddenly two of his schoolmates came in ordered a milkshake and went
towards the pinball machines. Johnny tried to make himself smaller in
the seat and hide. But his schoolmates took no notice and did not seem to
recognize or see him.
"Lets go now I am finished," his mother cried, pulling him from the seat.
He now had to walk past his schoolmates to get into the street. They
still did not seem to suspect who he was though. Just as they were
level with them his mother stopped.
"Stop darling, your hair ribbons not straight." Undoing the bow then
retying it to the hair curls. With some relief they proceeded into the
street, again unrecognized.
"We have an hour or two before your father finishes work. I need my hair
set so we will go to the hairdressers and get our hair done."
No! I though. But I was too scared and unable to protest out loud
followed her into the ladies hair salon. I don' think we had an
appointment as I had to wait on a seat with my mother for some time
before a dark-haired woman lead me to the hairdressing chair.
"Don't shampoo her hair just give it a trim and fluff it up a bit," my
mother told the hairdresser from her chair. The hair dresser sniped
brushed and combed my hair for some time, after she was satisfied she
squirted some smelly hair setting spray on my hair. "I think a couple of
pretty hair clips would make it look much nicer." Putting two blue clips
in my hair, then showed me the results in a mirror. "Come here girls and
see what a pretty young lady we have here."
All of the girls came and looked at me complimenting me on my looks. I
said nothing but could not stop my self from smiling at the image in
the mirror. I said nothing but could not stop my self from smiling at the
image in the mirror.
"She is a nice young lady," my mother complimented. "Next time we must
get her ears pierced with gold sleepers put in."
Eventually the ordeal was over? Then we left the shopping center setting
out in the direction of my fathers work about a mile away. What was dad
going to do or say when he saw me like this I thought again terrified?
But I followed along with my mother. When dad came out from his work with
the other workers, He saw us, my knees shaking. I waited as he
approached.
"Mmm! He does not look at all like a sissy now but a girl like we had
wanted when we were married," dad commented.
The three of us walk with my hand held now by my father back to pick up
the groceries then set out down the hill towards home. I rushed in the
door to get undressed and find my boys clothing. But the were no where to
be seen."
"Catherine, go and set the table while I get your fathers dinner ready.
Don't get undressed yet, you look so pretty today."
I obeyed, setting the table. We had dinner together. Then listened to the
radio until nine PM. "You had better go to bed, darling" ,my mother
ordered. I ran to my bedroom and took of the dreaded dress, stocking,
hair clips and shoes. I looked for my pajamas. On the bed was a pink
nightdress. I did not argue I knew it was useless. So I put on the silken
pink nightie, lay down and soon went to sleep. It had been a long day,
Next morning it was Sunday I awoke, pulled the nightdress off. But there
on the chair awaited the frilly white dress, panties, stockings and
shoes. My mother came in. "Before you get dressed Catherine, you must
have a bath." I went to the bathroom and toilet. The bath was already
full. I was scented, my mother had put some lavender oil in the water. I
got into the bath. I knew I would definitely smell like a girl now. My
mother dried me after I had finished my bath.
I then went back to my bedroom to put my dreaded dress and panties on.
After breakfast we went out into the outside world. I really felt a sissy
now. I was lead to Mrs. Menzies place. I met for the first time her
daughter Ann. I did despite my feeling silly began to feel how nice the
dress felt on my body.
I think my interest in B&D even though I had not heard of such things or
had any such knowledge. I used to imagine I was a witch being burnt at
the stake. The bathroom at my parents flat was separated from the house
was also the laundry. Several times I filled the gas copper in those pre-
washing machine days lit the gas, then got into the copper, trying to
feel what it was like to be cooked in a cannibals cauldron. I also put a
noose hung from the long pipe that stretched over the bath. Its end was
the shower rose. Luckily for me, as I was not at all suicidal. When I
jumped off the edge of the bath with the noose about my neck my weight
cause the long pipe to bend with me ending up on the baths bottom.
My parents were not at all wealthy. They had trouble paying my school
fees. At the age of 15, I had to finish school and go to work. A few
weeks later with my pay I went to Cursons. There very nervously I
purchased a Berli Sarong High waisted girdle plus a pair of silk
stockings.
I rushed with my newly purchase garments to the men's toilet. Behind
closed doors I stripped from my waist down, donned the tight fitting
corset, then put on the stockings. Put my male clothes on over the
foundation garment. I left the men's room to walk in the street I felt
for the first time the confinement of a good tight fitting corset. It
pulled my waist if a fair way. Soon I needed to tighten my belt to stop
my trousers falling down.
The weeks went by turning into years. I soon amounted a collection of
lingerie, dresses, and high heel shoes; make up. Fully dressing up in the
privacy of my bedroom at night, hiding them during the day. But I did
wear the lingerie and corsets under my male clothes to work. Then I began
to sneak out at night fully dressed savoring the feel of the wind
blowing my skirts together with the tap of my high heels on the pavement.
I had no knowledge of sex or girls. I had never spoken to on since my
younger days at primary school. I used to look at then and admire their
clothing but was to scare to ever try to do so much as talk to one let
alone go out on a date with a girl.
I reached the age of 21,never ever going to a party. Some one at work on
the day asked me to go out and celebrate at a pub. His companion said no
he is too boring. I worked at a hospital and studied, sometimes have 3
jobs. The daytime full time job, plus others at nights and weekends.
Except for at work I spent most of my time alone, going to the theatre or
concerts alone. Three days after that uneventful 21st birthday, Working
in a coffee shop come cafe which was going to play a part later in my
life. I used to talk to two prostitutes that came in late at night for a
coffee. I though they were nice girls. I was even ignorant of what their
profession was. Jack the proprietor asked me when my 21st was and what
was my party like, when I told him 3 days ago, so I had no 21st party.
He asked about if I had a girl friend. I said no! He went and spoke to
one of he girls, coming back he said he had asked one of them Anthea and
paid her to take me to her place for sex. She came over then dragged me
into to a taxi to a hotel room. Took her clothing off and told me to do
the same. I had never seen a naked woman before. I was frightened. I did
not know any thing about sex. She soon taught me.
But it was a horrible experience that first time. She was a rough red
headed cockney. She had to pull me onto her to show me how to do it. I
had like talking to her at the caf? but this was awful. A couple of
nights later she did not come into the coffee shop. The next day I saw
her photograph in the paper. She had been knifed and killed by one of her
clients. I guess today I am the only one who remembers her. Her companion
who came into the caf? with her, I was to meet again ten or so years
later. She was one of the B&D Mistresses I visited.
I had never been out with a girl until I was 23 nor been to a party until
my wedding breakfast. I was 26 before I met and married my wife. Both of
us still virgins in a way despite my single venture with Anthea. I threw
away all my feminine clothing or buried them in some sand hills near my
parents place. I found work in the country at a hospital that was better
paying, and the housing cheaper.
We had 3 children. Gradually I began to secretly gather another
collection of feminine clothing, dressing while my wife and children were
away. Hiding the dresses up the manhole in the hallway ceiling. I began
to dress openly, traveling to other nearby towns to shopping centres
unknown to my wife. My work required me to visit the city for
conferences. I began to travel, venturing forth as a woman. I joined a
heterosexual crossdressers club, going out to restaurants in a group, to
the theatre or opera in evening dress.
s started to go for trips to the city, Staying in motels. I remaining
dressed for the period of my stay. I had my ears pierced, long acrylic
nails put on at a beauty salon. I enjoyed walking about the city shopping
in high heels. Trying on, sometimes buying dresses, skirts blouses, shoes
and lingerie openly. Ate lunch and dinner in restaurants, went to the
theatre alone.
One night with the members of a CD club that met once a fortnight. At the
end of the week I drove almost back the whole 800 km to my hometown. I
had great difficulty changing back, even more problems trying to remove
the acrylic fingernails. One day I was walking in full dress down the
street in Sydney near the hospital where I worked in my student days. An
attractive woman who looked familiar approached.
She said, "You are John? You Look great. Remember me, I was a nurse up
there at the hospital years ago."
I recognised her now but could not remember her name. "I call my self-
Madeline now. What do you call yourself now?"
"Catherine," I said.
"No, you are Joanna."
"Where are you staying?"
"A motel," replied the new Joanna.
"Come and stay at my place. I know you will like it, while you are in the
city and save your money'" she gave me her address then I went to get my
luggage. Later I realized she was also the other prostitute that had been
Anthea's, companion. Her place proved to be in the main road up a flight
of stairs. The stairway was dark and black, her door painted bright red.
I knocked. She showed me in, then showed me to a bed room where I put my
bags down.
"Come and have a cup of tea," she said showing me the way to the kitchen.
We passed several closed doors. We had tea and cake. "Need a shower?."
I did. It's was down hall there. I went and had my shower. I finished
needing to put some make up on again I went to my room with a towel
wrapped about my waist to fetch my make up bag. Returning to the bathroom
all my clothing was missing. I called out to Madeline who I could hear
behind one of the closed doors.
"I'm here! Come in."
I went, opened the closed door, entering into the darkness of the room.
I felt my hands being grasped pulled behind my back and handcuffed. My
towel fell to the floor. Something was being put about my neck, a leather
collar. I started to yell, something was pushed into my mouth. A gag. It
was fastened. All I could do now was make mumbling noises. The lights
came on. There was Madeline all dressed in a leather corset, suspenders,
fish net stockings and high heel long boots. I was in a B&D dungeon. I
had heard or rather read about such places. But this was a first for me.
"You are John again. Not my friend Joanna at the moment. You are now my
slave." The chain pulled me along by the dog collar I saw I was wearing.
I was lead to the far wall given some slaps with Madeline's hand on my
behind. "Face the wall." I turned a blindfold was put over my eyes. I
could not see, all was black. "You will call me Mistress and only say
yes, no, please and thank you while you are my slave John."
I felt the handcuffs being unlocked. My arms were stretched and spread
out above my head and fastened to something on the wall. "Legs apart,"
she ordered. I did as I was told! Then my ankles were also attached to
the wall. "I will leave you like that now for a while I have some clients
to take care of. You will be able to hear what's happening but not see
them or move." They will be able to observe you chained to the wall
though."
I heard the door close, all was silent. I was stretched out there unable
to move or do a thing for what seemed hours my arms and legs cramped and
painful when I finally heard the door open and voices. The noise of
chains rattling, then the swish of a whip and cries of pain from a man.
There were lots of further sounds that I could not then recognise. After
a long time all was quite for a moment when I again hear the swish of a
whip and the feel of the pain of it cutting about my behind. It was
excruciating. I heard a male voice count to ten and then the lashes
against my by bare bum stopped. I felt weak and tried to fall. But the
bands about my wrists attached to the wall stopped my descent.
The boy who ran away from the cane had just felt ten lashes of the whip.
I was in shock, terrified about my fate, yet I felt strangely safe. I
was completely helpless, unable to do a thing and accepted my fate just
like young Johnny did when his mother transformed him into a sissy girl.
All went quiet again no one was in the room. I hung there face hanging on
the wall for a long time the pains and cramps in my arms now worse that
the brief pains of the whipping.
After a long time Madeline came into the room. Releasing me she lead me
back into my bedroom by the dog collar. I was too weak to resist anyway.
"Down on the bed!" she ordered. I fell onto the bed cramped and
exhausted. I felt my wrists being fastened to the bed head, I was
helpless again. I was still blindfolded and gagged. I felt my scrotum
being tickled and stimulated with something.
I rose to the occasion. It continued until I was writhing in
anticipation. Suddenly I felt Madeline on top of me. I was being raped by
woman who was completely in charge of my person. Eventually I could hold
on no longer and came. A few minutes later a felt the stimulation again
I was in ecstatic painful avouchment. Then raped and aroused again. A
second and third time. I was left alone for a while and then I heard
Madeline come back into the room. MY legs were spread apart and
fastened at the foot of the bed I felt my male parts being washed and
cleaned.
Then a stinging within my urethra. A nurse was catheterizing me.
Madeline when she had finished my gag and blindfold were removed. IT took
a couple of minutes before I could see properly. I was spread eagled face
up on the bed. Madeline said, "You were good. But you had no choice
anyway. Drink this. I had no choice but to drink by the teat a babies
full of wonderful tasting fresh orange drink. I'm going to bed now see
you in the morning. Good night John, sweet dreams."
I was going to be left like this all night. I knew now why I had been
catheterized I would not have to worry about peeing the bed that night.
My arms and legs began to ache again painfully, but I could do nothing
about it at all. I had no choice but to lay there unable to move all
night. I think it was hours later I went to sleep briefly. I kept
thinking about how the whip felt on my bottom but especially how Madeline
looked in her black leather corset.
I was very stiff and sore when Madeline came in the middle of next
morning the sun, which I could see shinning through a crack in the
blacked out window had been up for some hours. I was released from the
bed and the catheter expertly pulled out. My dog collar remained fastened
on I was still weak so I could not resist the pull on my neck. I was lead
into a room. Still dizzy the dog collar was removed, I was ordered to lay
down on the floor with eyes closed. I did as I was told and a minute or
so later I felt my head being lifted, then a cold feeling about my neck.
"Keep your eyes closed." I was again ordered I did as I was told, then I
felt something on my chest It felt like Madeleine's arms or legs. "Open
your eyes and mouth." I obeyed, opening them I found my head was encased
in a clear plastic box with the top open except upon the top was a black
plastic toilet seat with Madeleine sitting upon the seat exposing her
female parts. Before I could do a thing I felt my face getting wet and
my mouth filling with urine. I was experiencing my first 'Golden Shower'.
"Was that a nice morning refresher?" I was still too busy swallowing the
last drops of my morning drink. Wiping her with some toilet paper, then
dropping it on my face. Madeleine released me and said, "Go and have a
nice warm shower John. I want to have breakfast with Joanna. We will then
get dressed, go out shopping for some new dresses for her and have lunch.
I will think about what is going to happen to John when Joanna and I
return."
I rushed to the shower finding Joanna's clothes hanging up with her make
up on the wash stand. I showered and dressed as quickly as I was hungry
but not as thirsty as I might have been. The taste in my mouth lingered
for some time after breakfast. I showered dressed then put my make up and
perfume on. Then headed towards the kitchen.
Mistress Madeline with greeted Joanna, "Hope you had a good nights sleep
Dear. After we have had breaky, I will take you to a wonderful fashion
warehouse. Might find something you really like there?" We went there by
taxi as girls together. It was a wonderful place. I could have spent
thousands of dollars, but eventually after looking at the entire store
we settled on a red skirt and jacket from me. Madeline chose a long
slinky black dress that really showed of her figure. She is such a
curvaceous well-endowed woman that any man or CD could not help envy. We
had a grand lunch at a well-known international hotel. I insisted on
paying. We had a wonderful day as girls together chatting and gossiping.
On return to her place things changed as soon as I entered the red door.
"Go and change dear. I think I was too easy on John last night." I
undressed, washed off my make up. Then I left the room naked, walked to
the dungeon door. On entering I heard the command, "Get on your knees
slave John." I obeyed without hesitation. I looked up at Mistress
Madeline standing their legs apart. "Crawl over here," she commanded. I
crawled along the hard wooden floor until I was before my Mistress.
"Don't ever look at me again. Eyes down. My boots need a cleaning, lick
them till they are bright and shiny to my satisfaction."
I licked each of her boots for about ten or fifteen minutes. I thought I
had done a good job enjoying the experience. "That's not good enough at
all you did not clean the soles." Lay on your back and I turned over.
Then my Mistress put one of her boots over my face. I liked and licked
each of her presented soles until all the dirt was cleaned off the
leather. It did not taste nice at all, but I did as I was ordered.
"Get up off the floor slug. Come here slime." Eyes down, I walked
towards where my mistresses voice came from. "Head in there, wrist in
here!" she commanded. It was a set of stocks or pillory like they put
convicts in years ago. I dutifully put my neck and wrists into the semi
circle of the heavy wooden stocks. The upper part came down trapping me
tightly within the circles of wood. My mistress securely locked it
closed. My ankle were still free so they were manacled to the base of
the stocks. I was trapped with my bare behind extended.
"I like Joanna. She can stay here for free. But you as a slave have to
pay the price." I was then blindfolded and gagged once more. "I've some
clients who would like to whip that arse, one is coming later. But first
I will give you a taste of the cane." Swish, swish. I felt the bite of
he cane on my behind. It seems more painful than the bite of a whip. I
screamed into my gag as she gave me 20 strokes. My behind was again on
fire. "I spoilt you yesterday, I won't today." I felt wads of cotton wool
being pushed into my ears. Now not only could I not move see or speak now
my ears were blocked up so I could not hear.
I was left there for what seemed like hours unable to move see or hear.
All at once I felt the sting of a whip on my behind. The lashes coming
fast and frequent. I was in utter agony. Then it stopped as suddenly as
it started. A long time pasted in oblivion. The heat and pain of the
whipping gradually subsided. I began to think, but all I could think of
was the pain of the whipping. I became bored and restless. How long was I
going to be left here in the stocks? Hours past by I began to yearn for
the feel of the whip and the relief from the boredom it brought. Without
warning I felt what I now recognized as the stroke of a cane. It was
again in agonizing pain.
Suddenly again it stopped. Almost immediately I began to yearn for the
whip or cane and its painful relief from the boredom of confinement in
the stocks for so long. I remember they used to leave prisoners in such
contraptions all day outside the jails. I felt my gag being loosened and
my earplugs removed. Mistress Madeline spoke, "What do you say for that?"
"Thank you Mistress," I mumbled through the loosened gag.
"Want some more?"
"Yes please Mistress," I found my self-saying.
"Good my client now is going to give you a hundred lashes. You will count
each lash backwards from a hundred. Any mistake, mumble or miscount will
result in my giving you ten more for each mistake, after my client has
finished the hundred lashes." I heard the swish of the whip and feel its
pain.
"A hundred," I try to say clearly through the gag the count begins to
decrease, 90, 80. It's beginning to become unbearable as the count goes
down. After an eternity the count reaches 50. Half way I think. I can't
bear any more. But I have no choice in the matter anyway. The count
reaches 10 finally. Its soon be over I think. The lashes seem to get
harder and unbearable. Finally I reply one and the lashes cease. I hear
Mistress Madeline open the door to let her client out. Then silence for
a while.
Then my Mistresses voice said, "You made three mistakes so its 30 more.
I'm not going to be so lenient. . Start counting"
"Thirty, 29, 28, 27, 26, till the count reaches 10. . This is not too bad
I thought. Then I felt the stroke of the whip wrap around my back and
shoulders for the first time. This is far worse that the bottom whipping.
I really start to scream and yell. Asking for mercy eventually expelling
the gag, freely screaming to the world.
My Mistress finishes the final lash. I am in a state of collapse, but I
hear my Mistress leave the room again. Time passes. Even though I'm still
feeling the pain of the back lashing, I begin to want more. Mistress
Madeline returns. "Liked it didn't you, on the floor again, you. I'm not
giving you any more or Joanna won't be able to wear her bra and corset
tomorrow." I'm released falling onto the floor. I feel my ankles being
strapped together, a dog collar and chain being attached to my neck.
I'm on a dog chain on the floor and can only crawl on my hands unable to
stand.
"There is a doggie bowl of water a plus another with some meat." My
mistress leaves the room. I am famished so straight away I crawl across
the floor to the bowls. I can only just reach them with my tongue. I
greedily lap them clean. I'm alone again and want to go to the toilet.
Eventual I have to wet myself and I start to really smell like a dog.
Later I hear the door open and see My Mistress plus a man and a woman
looking through the door at me laughing then calling me good doggy. They
leave. But my Mistress soon returns. "My you took what you deserved well
without too much whimpering. Though I certain you would have run away
like Joanna told me you did when you were a little boy. Go and have a
shower and I will watch TV with you." I go and shower. I could now see
the bruises and welts all over myself in the mirror. But not on my legs
or arms. I dry myself, then head towards the lounge room still naked and
sit down in a chair along side my Mistress.
"Don't think you are just going to watch television do you? Put your dog
collar on again." I obey unhesitant. My mistress opens her legs. Around
each of her upper thighs are what appear also being dog collars. "Come
down here before me," I'm ordered. I kneel between her legs. Each side
of my dog collar is attached to the straps around her thighs. I am held
on my knees trapped between her ample thighs. She closes them tightly
encapsulating my head, continuing to watch TV. In a commercial break,
suddenly she parts her thighs and bends her knees. My face and mouth are
pulled up against her pussy. I know what's expected and start to lick her
feminine parts with my tongue, My Mistress sighs in pleasure. Eventually
she has an orgasm and straightens her knees leaving my head fastened
between the thighs.
Next commercial break and I hear another sigh as she bends her knees and
I am drawn up against now wet h pussy. Again I start to lick her labia.
It's nice down their but overwhelming feminine scents. After the movie
finishes a couple of hours later I am released. The chain again attached
to the dog collar, then lead back to the dungeon. The water and food
bowls are filled. "There is a sand tray over there if you need to make a
mess of yourself." The door closes and I'm left on the doggy chain for
the night.
The next two days of my stay are as Joanna. Us girls go out and have a
good time eating and going to the movies. The after noon before I am to
leave we go to a beauty salon where Madeline treats me to having acrylic
nails attached to my finger tips. Next morning Joanna dresses and after
Breakfast and starts the drive home to a so-called normal world with work
but little play.
When I arrived home and change back into John I could see the welts and
bruises from my punishments. They even a cover my penis. It took over 3
months for them to disappear completely I have to be careful no one sees
my naked body until they have healed.
For the next few years I visit the city about three times a year staying
with Madeline as Joanna and slave John. The wimp who could not cope with
the teachers cane has become not only a cross dresser but a BD submissive
slave who looks forward to pain and punishment even licking her boots to
clean them
Each time I visited Madeleine she and Joanna went out as girls together.
But John was treated just like a slave. There was always something new to
experience. When Madeline used John as a submissive for any of her
clients nothing sexual was permitted. Madeline owned John when he was her
slave. Only the Mistress had sexual privileges with her slave. Other new
or inexperienced Mistresses were taught using John as the whipping boy so
to speak I was suspended, whipped over whipping benches caned and
tortured by methods such as nipple clamps or having to wear a male
chastity belt locked onto my male parts, which caused pain and discomfort
if he experienced an erection.
Madeline had a cage suspended from the ceiling in the entrance hall that
she used to like suspending John in so clients could see him encased to
awaken their fears or just scare the clients. Madeline had a corset that
she made both Joanna and John wear during the later visits. It was a
black full length Victorian fully boned lace up corset that was a cage in
itself. The reason it was to be feared despite the glorious sensations
given by the wearer of lace up Victorian corsets, the corset had three
hasps at the back, top, waist and bottom that could be secured by small
padlocks. Once laced up and locked the wearer could not get out of the
corset until it was unlocked at the back.
Wearing this corset did wonders for the figure. Its discipline kept the
wearers back straight and erect especially when wearing high heels, the
wearer unable to bend at the waist. After being locked in this corset day
and night for a week was hard to endure. But once locked in this corset
there was no escape. John literally worshipped Madeleine as a goddess
both physically and mentally while he was enslaved. She always kept this
to her advantage as well as her pleasure, but not for her slaves
pleasure.
Once Madeline took John out for the day with him wearing only a pair of
swim shorts. I was made lay down in the rear seat handcuffed, hands in
front and blindfolded so I could not be seen or know where I was being
taken. The drive took at least a couple of hours with me bumping up and
down on the floor in front of the rear. The car eventually stopped and I
was helped out and led by the dog collar for a short distance. My
handcuffs undone. Then my arms were placed about something round and
rough. I was gagged and my blindfold taken off. I was cuffed hugging a
pine tree some where in the bush far from anywhere it seemed.
My swimmers were pulled down and off, then my ankles were tied by ankle
cuffs roped around the base of the tree. I was naked and embracing the
rough bark of the tree unable to move or protest. Madeline stripped of
her jeans and blouse, then put on a very brief bikini. She took a whip
out of the car then gave me fifty hard lashes on my exposed behind. With
each strike as I tried to writhe or wriggle to lessen the pain of the
lash, the rough bark of the tree cut into the flesh of my chest and
thighs.
When she was finished she walked away. In the distance was a running
creek into which she dived for a swim in the cool water. After a long
time swimming, I thought I was going to be released. When she got out of
the water, dried herself with a towel, she gave me another 50 hard
lashes, with the bark of the tree abrading my skin as I writhed in agony.
She did not release me after the whipping. She spread the towel out, on
the ground took off her bikini, then lay down, sun baking to improve her
tan. Turning over several times or sitting up to apply sun lotion. I
could see her in her naked glory unable to move or compliment her about
her beautiful body.
The sun started to fade. It was getting cooler. Madeline released me from
the tree. I was again weak from the cramps of confinement to the tree. I
was pulled back by the dog collar into the car still naked. It was dark
when we arrived back in the parking lot near her place. So naked, I was
pulled along by the dog chain along the street to her abode. No one
seemed to see me in this state during the journey from car to dungeon.
On another occasion I was dressed in one of Madeline's cat suits, Tight
enough to show my maleness at the crotch. Collared and blindfolded wrists
loosely restrained behind my back, then dragged down the stairs, out into
the street. I could not see where I was been taken to on the dog chain.
She helped me step down several concrete gutters to apparently cross at
least three roads. It took 15 to 30 minutes to arrive somewhere? I heard
my lead being fastened to something. I was told to sit like a good
doggie. I heard female laughter from several women who said things to me
such as nice doggie, what's his name etc. Then Madeleine ask for a
cappuccino and raisin toast. It seemed I was chained to something at a
sidewalk caf?.
I heard Madeleine and the other women talking and gossiping. When a
strange woman said, "Oh! Your little puppy must be thirsty too." I heard
her say something to some one. "Get him a bowl of water and some meat."
Some time later I heard a two bowls clinking on the cement pavement near
me. My blindfold was taken partially off. Indeed it was a coffee shop
that I recognized as Lorinzini's near Kings Cross. I was chained to the
leg of a wrought iron table, before me was a bowl of water and another
containing some salami. I was commanded to eat. I was thirst and hungry,
so I quickly lapped up the water and ate the salami from the bowls. It
had sexually stimulated me and I know the women could see that by the way
they spoke to me that my erection was evident through the tight cat suit
by the manner they teased and the comments they made. When I finished
eating and drinking, I was again blindfolded. Then they stayed seated
again gossiping and talking for at least an hour. Eventual after good
byes and further laughing about my state and me we left and I was
tugged along the road until I felt the blindfold being taken off at the
bottom of the stairway to Madeline dungeon.
In the past both as Joanna and John used to have a cup of coffee at
Lorinzini's. I knew the proprietor. Since that evening I can never even
walk passed that caf? in case someone might recognize me and remember
that night.
My week was up the next day and I returned home to a busy mundane life
for a few months. One-day months later, I phoned Madeline to say I was
coming down to visit and got no answer. When I dressed as Joanna arrived
in the city she found the building was deserted and up for rent, Madeline
missing or gone to who knew where?
Of course over the years, I have now visited and had to pay various
mistresses for their services, but only as John to be punished and
tortured. Except for one, who had known me at Madeline's and never
punished me as severely as Madeline. This Mistress was a Lesbian who
really hated men. When I visited her, she had another client coming. So
to keep me out of the way I was hog tied, wrists and ankles tied together
blindfolded and gagged. The ankle chained to a ring on the wall with me
face down unable to move. It was a very hard cold wooden floor. In this
position the weight of my body was mostly tipped onto my face resting on
the cold floor.
I was there for the hour or so she tended to the other client who I could
hear being whipped. When she finally came back to attend to my session I
was untied, the gag taken out, then to a sort of massage table with a
hole in the top. She asked, "Whip or cane?"
I answered, "Cane." I was strapped face down arms by my side to the sides
on the table, waist strapped down on the table. My thighs also strapped
together and to the sides of the table. My legs and ankle were left
untied. I then found why there was a hole in the table. My scrotum was
pulled through this hole and a strap crushing my balls together, then a
clamp to the foreskin of my now erect penis to which a chain and weights
pulled and stretched my manly parts towards the floor. She began to cane
my bottom very hard. I knew now why she had left the ankles unrestrained.
As the canning got harder and the strokes increase, I could not help but
kick and bend my legs faster and faster with the pain of the strokes.
She paused in the middle of the caning, then started to hit my
outstretched masculinity with the tip of the cane. This made my legs kick
back and forward with the pain even faster. My balls and penis were on
fire and in extreme pain. She stopped that after an indeterminable time.
Then resumed the canning proper. I was trying to scream for mercy through
the large ball gag in my mouth to now avail. I was almost in a state of
collapse when the canning stopped suddenly. I was momentarily released
and dragged down over the end of the table. Then strapped down over the
end of the table in a complete state of submission.
I was then shown by the Mistress what was going to happen to me next. She
had an enormous strap on dildo strapped to her pelvis. She put lubricant
in it and then I felt the lubricants coldness on my anus, then for some
time I felt agony and pain when she thrust forward trying to enter me.
It took a long time for her to get it in. Then she pushed and pushed it
within my person getting deeper and deeper. The pain was almost as bad as
the whipping. It seemed to go on forever. I was well and truly bring
raped, unable to do a thing or resist.
She eventually finished to her satisfaction. I was finally released from
the end of the table in a state of exhaustion and collapse. I lay in a
heap on the floor for a long time before another Mistress unknown help me
to the shower. She washed me herself, then helped me dress, and gave me a
drink. I think it was Brandy, and then helped me to the door and freedom.
It took 2 months for the bruising and welts to completely go from my
behind, penis and scrotum. My ass hurt for two weeks after every time I
passed faeces. I remember this session now wishing it could reoccur or
rehappen.
It is strange however in that the way and position in which one is
whipped affects the outcome. Stretched out face down on the bed, the whip
or cane seems to hurt in a particular spot where it is applied even if
the blows are crisscrossed. Being whipped in the standing position the
whip tends to wrap itself about your body, the whip end or ends inflict
pain and welts that extend and curl towards the front of the body
especially if a long whip is being applied.
Mistress Madeleine and later my wife had a technique of restraining me to
the outer end of one of the crossbars on an Australian 'Hills' rotary
clothesline. Then they wind up the hoist until I am almost am on tiptoe.
They start whipping my bare bum. As the whip end curls about my bum I do
not can't quite run nor can I quite jump up and down. But the clothesline
with my leg movements starts to rotate. Soon I am slowly going around and
around in a circle like a merry go round. This is painful. I try to avoid
the lashes but never can. They have watched this torture tell me it is so
amusing to watch me go dancing and gyrating around the clothesline.
I know even though I am blindfolded I can hear the laughs, giggles and
catcalls from others who have been watching my humiliation. People who
laugh at you in bondage and discipline always seem to treat you with much
more respect after, than the same people would under so called normal
circumstances.
Mistress Madeleine once did something to show Joanna how vulnerable a
woman can become. One day while I was looking at Mistress Madeleine's
wardrobe full of beautiful clothes when she came into the room.
"There is an outfit there. I would like to see how you look dressed in a
mini skirt." She got a red short skirted dress out and told me to see how
I looked in it. She also pulled out one of her black lacy corsets plus a
pair of fishnet stockings. She asked me to leave my beige panty hose on
then put on the corset and fishnets, then the red mini dress. I complied
enthusiastically.
" Not quite right yet," she said. Then got out a gold lame jacket to
compliment the skirt plus an over the shoulder handbag. She then produced
a pair of red six-inch heel crocodile skin shoes for me to wear. I was
dressed to kill. Madeleine said, "You look sexy. Lets go out for a cup of
coffee."
We girls went out with Madeleine all dressed in black. She drove me up to
Kings cross ande parked the car. We then went to a pavement coffee shop.
We had two cups of coffee. I noticed men looking and staring at us girls.
After the coffee Madeleine said, "Lets go home." She headed quickly
towards where the car was parked. I had difficulty keeping up in my six-
inch heels and tight skirt. She got to the car, got in saying as she
drove away, "See you later," and drove off leaving me alone in Kings
Cross with an empty hand bag.
What was I going to do with no money for a taxi or even a bus? Madeleine
place was in Parramatta Road, Camperdown, 3 or 4 miles away. I had no
choice to walk through Kings Cross and down William Street through the
city, then down Parramatta Road. Terrified, I walked through, 'The Cross'
with everyone seemingly staring at me and my long fishnet clad legs below
my mini skirt. But worse was to come as I walked down William Street
where the infamous road where Sydney's prostitutes lined the pavement or
roadside. I could not walk very fast in my heel down that steep hill
scared I would fall.
Several times cars slowed down with men driving past, honking horns and
calling out things like, 'How about a bit darling,' 'How much for a short
time' or just blatantly looking me up and down. A police car drove past,
but thankfully they did not stop. I think it took me a half an hour to
walk and stumble down William Street. Then another hour to walk through
the main part of the city and down Parramatta Road. Every hundred yards
or so cars hooted at me or whistled.
Eventually I arrived at Medallions Place, footsore, hot and tired. I
realised I did not have a key so I knocked loudly on the door on the
door. No one answered. Madeleine was not inside. I cringed in the
darkness of the doorway watching the cars drive past. Ten minutes or so
later Madeleine appeared walking along the street.
"Have a lovely walk dear?" she sniggered. "It's a nice night for a
stroll."
I asked her angrily sobbing, "Why did you bloody well drive off and leave
me alone. Men thought I was a prostitute I could have been arrested."
"You felt like a woman to night, how vulnerable a woman alone can be on
the streets. No one though you weren't`a lady did they?" I was still
angry and definitely feeling vulnerable even on her doorstep. "You were
safe. I was driving just behind you if you got into strife." I was still
angry. That night in bed I wondered though if those men had thought me
sexy or attractive. Or had the recognised me for what I am. That's even
more frightening. What if one had grabbed me and pulled me into their
car. Even Madeleine could have done nothing. I certainly had been a
vulnerable woman in the night alone.
Looking back in retrospect it had been fun. Pity now in old age I no
longer had the figure to get away with such a venture. Joanna always
tries to become and act as a lady. Though it is impossible to relay take
the form and appearance of a woman, I do not like to be humiliated or see
my self as an inferior woman in the way as CD's like to be humiliated and
punished as women and submit by playing the role as an inferior female
for sexual reasons.
A few months ago, I met Madeline in the street driving a Black Jaguar
sports car. We recognized each other instantly even though we had both
aged a bit. Madeline had married a Doctor client of hers and now has a
grown up family of four children. I wonder what practices the Doctor is
involved in away from his surgery?
My wife of course found out about Joanna and slave John through one of my
mistresses who she met. After taking some time to get used to the idea.
She likes it when Joanna does all the housework, cooking, etc. Now that
the children have left home, she really seems to like locking me spread-
eagled face down of our bed. For hours whipping him making him beg for
mercy. But showing none. Eventually after many hours I am released.
Turned over teased and whipped until I beg for mercy and she raping me.
She has been known to put me on a dog chain sometimes when I am getting
underfoot. She does not approve entirely of Joanna venturing forth in the
outside world near to where we live. But to be able to punish her husband
for his discrepancies can be a pleasure. When he is in bondage unable to
do a single thing when he is completely at her mercy or whim.
One must trust the person in charge of you in a bondage or submissive
situation. Madelaine was from the start extremely hard on me, but she
knew what I could cope with even if I did not. My wife however put me in
a situation that in the first incidence I did not like at all. I was
punished and let out of bondage except for my dog collar. I was told to
lie down on the floor. I obeyed unhesitantly. I was naked. My ankles were
they chained together and a leash put onto the dog collar. I was told I
had not been nice to her that week at all. I was going to get what I
deserved.
With my legs loosely chained together, all I could do when she pulled on
the leash was to crawl after her as she pulled me out the back door into
the back yard of our large country property. I was lead about a 100
meters toward the Hills hoist to which a long chain had been attached.
The leash was taken off the dog collar then the end of the chain was
padlocked to my collar. "You were really a dog to me this week so you are
going to be treated like one."
The chain is just long enough to reach the dog kennel. There was a bowl
of water outside the kennel for me to drink and another bowl for food
which I will given in the morning. If I wanted to piss or shit, I had to
do it away from the kennel if I didn't want to smell it all the time. I
was left there naked unable to stand on the lawn. It began to be hot
after a while so I crawled to the kennel. My knees were sore and my
legs stiff. There was a blanket inside for me if it got cooler for I
realised that I was going to spend the night in the kennel.
The afternoon passed just before sunset my wife bought out some cold beef
stew putting it in my food bowl the wished me a good nights rest. I had
to pass my motions and urinate so I crawled as far away from the kennel
as I could. Then crawled back ate my meal, then settled down for the
night under the blanket.
Next morning my wife came out to refill my water and food bowl. I thought
I was going to be let off after my meal, but instead my wife produced the
garden hose and washed me down completely. I soon found that if I tried
to roll on my side when wet I would get dirt and grass on myself. Surely
I was going to be let out now? No I was not I was kept on that chain four
days and nights unable to slip the chain or stand up. If I did not behave
now after a whipping I am threatened with this treatment, which I don't
like. The whipping is not as humiliating as being put on the chain three
times. It's OK at first but the nights in the kennel are rather
dehabilitating. If I cry out, nothing happens. No one can hear me, as the
neighbors are a kilometer away. I'm given the hose treatment if I make
too much noise. If I'm good I am put on the lead, and then taken for a
walk or a crawl about the property.
I ask for a heavy whipping in place of the doghouse. She complies
usually, but if she is really annoyed at me or is sick of the sight of me
it's the doghouse for me literally. The worse thing about the doghouse is
the flies or bugs that crawl over your body making you feel itchy. No
wonder dogs and cats scratch themselves so often
I'm now 60. This cross dressing has been going on for over 50 years while
apparently living a normal family lifestyle, The punishment discipline
and bondage of John has been carried out for over 35 years. I often
wonder if the sex change operation had been easily available if I would
have made the transformation permanent. I could imagine myself as a full
time slave to a Mistress like Madeleine owned and branded with her name.
I do know now that with the sex change I could have worked as a woman in
my present profession in these modern enlightened times. Money to keep up
appearances is an important factor in trying to live and look like a
woman.
John is still a quiet and meek boy, fearful and nervous in social
situations. However Joanna is out going, talkative like any woman, and
has a much more cheerful personality. I don't know really why I am a CD
and a B&D fantasist. Maybe it had something to do with my childhood,
being unable to socialize, a lone child and a born loner? My only escape
fantasy. My mother was in a manner of speaking a dominatrix. She kept my
father well and truly under her thumb. Picked him up after work most
days. When he worked in the city she went to the city every day,
wandering about till he finished his job. She spent a lot on herself,
event though my father was on a low wage, only the best was purchased, by
lay buy. Dresses, jewelry, shoes and ousehold goods. I never realy knew
my father as a person until after she died.
I was kept away from other children, allowed to mix with others. I could
not play sport, learn to swim or music at school because she would buy
the equipment needed. I am short sighted and could not see the
blackboard. I have a coordination problem that would have been improved
if I had played sport. This situation could not happen in modern society
with its advanced learning philosophies. My mother saw most other men and
women as evil, with whom I was allowed not to mix or associate.
The only things I could do had to be in secret or in my imagination. I
learnt about the outside world or others through books borrowed from
libraries. I am still an avid reader. I was and am still an outsider. I
never met any of my other relatives until recently. There was of course a
deep family secret which remains hidden. I suspect I have a half brother
alive somewhere, maybe in Queensland where my parents were born.
There were two other women in my life. The first I met at work, fell
madly in love with her. She seem to like me, was friendly on and off.
But I could never get close to her for some reason. I discovered only
recently she had been a frightened and then undecided lesbian. I still
think about her and love her.
The other woman who greatly influenced my life and who still does affect
my life, I met about 20 years ago at a B&D establishment. She was sitting
on a lounge crying her heart out. She was the widow of a surgeon who I
worked for during a holiday relief job in Queensland. She had been in
desperate straights after marital problems with a second husband and
having bought up 4 children alone. Susan, in dire need of money, had
tried to take on the position of a submissive female. The first whipping
she had received that day was a heavy 60 lashes.
Her lifestyle had been one of wealth turned into poverty. She had always
been a little unstable. Now she suffered from Bipolar disorder or manic
depression. She was in a mess mentally and physical. When I saw her on
the lounge crying, I had a vision of us as women together outside a
cathedral in medieval times when our names were Cedwen and Kerriden. I
instantly fell in love with her. She was very overweight then but still a
beautiful woman in my vision. I spent the remainder of my time there not
seeing Mistress Barbara whom I had come to visit, but in talking and
comforting Susan. I went home a few days expecting never to hear from her
again.
When 3 months later I received a phone call from her. She had set up a
B&D dungeon herself and had employed 2 other Mistresses to look after the
clients. I soon went down to the city to visit her at her establishment.
We went out and had dinner several times. She asked me if I wanted to
have a B&D session. I said no I was here to see Susan not Mistress
Cedwen, the name that she had adopted. I helped her do some further
setting up of the dungeon. We spent a week together with me sleeping in a
separate room then I returned home. We phoned each other regularly via
long distance calls several times a week. I went down to visit her again
several times.
Only after about 12 months did she invite me into her bed. Susan became
the second woman other than my wife that I had hugged, kissed or made
love. She was however very ill and subject to mood swings, hypochondria
and sometimes violence. I began to regularly receive depressed suicidal
calls from her at home and work. She regularly took overdoses of her.
Medication. The complete story of Susan's life experiences both real
and imagined could easily form the basis of a novel or soapy. She
eventually broke down completely, and then left the city to live in a
large country town.
Susan told a lot of stories some real and others out of her imagination.
She quickly makes an impression on people when she is what I call her
real self, which is a bout 25% of the time. But then the other aspects of
her character emerge and they quickly disappear. Strangely it is the
stories of her imagination most believe. Then she changes personality.
But the real adventures in her extraordinary life they tend to
disbelieve, the phone calls and my visits to Susan continued and still
continue to this day 20 years later. When I became ill myself, I went and
lived with her for 3 weeks. But it was impossible to live with her and
stay sane. I had no contact with her for several months till a phone call
from her started the affair again. My wife met her and became friends of
a sort. Of course they swapped notes about my strengths and weaknesses
to my disadvantage, which resulted in my wife becoming a sort of
dominatrix who delighted in punishing me in bondage and using.
Susan told my wife about the various methods of B&D situations I could be
put into also that she could use Joanna as her housemaid. My wife became
ill also. It has become a triangle of sickness and pain within an
impossible situation. Involving my wife, Susan and myself. The pains of
whippings I still receive are less than the anguish and depression of ill
health. What ever the outcome the feelings of love still continues to
exist despite the pain or anguish that are a normal part of life as a
human.
I am now semi retired due to illness after working in the one position
for 30 years. I cross dress as Joanna, about 3 days a week, wear a
nightdress to bed every night. I have about 20 of them but only a
single pair of men's pajamas. I am involved with B&D situations about
twice a month with my wife when I am beaten, whipped or caned by my wife
while kept in bondage or held within a set of wooden stocks I myself
made, blindfolded and gagged unable to move or resist in any way. My wife
after punishing me in bondage, arouses or teases me sexually with a whip
or cane while I am still entrapped in bondage then rapes me until she is
satisfied.
My wife, often when John is spread-eagled, gets out my electric razor and
completely shaves my torso and legs. Then she gets some scented lavender
moisturizer cream rubs it all over my body and face the reshaves me with
the safety razor, so Maid Joanna is all smooth and nice when she does the
housework the day after. I always enjoy the confinement and discomfort of
these 3 or more hour sessions looking forward to them eagerly. Other
times I feel the whole thing is silly or crazy, I am mad. It does not
last for long, before I am dressing or entering into B&D once more.
Maybe because it involves the touch of another person feelings or the
emotions that give life meaning?
What ever I feel. There is nothing better than the feel of dressing up in
lingerie, dress and make up, high heels and jewelry. Once transformed, I
do not want to resume my male self. Alas it has to be done eventually. I
undress as quickly as I am able to before I get despondent donning an
evening dress when visiting Sydney go out to the opera usually alone. But
if another CD accompanies it is fabulous.
I remember the first time I went to the opera house at first scared but
by the first interval strengthened by a glass of champagne I had no
trouble lining up in the crowd of ladies to go to the powder room. Then
touch up my make up at the row of wash basins with mirror about 20 meters
in length or to admire myself in the full length mirrors along the
opposite wall. A woman can change dress colour and style to transfer
herself so easily into a different person.
I can remember vividly my many adventures as Joanna or Johnny's B&D
sessions over the past 50 years or so far better than my so-called normal
working life which was boring but demanding because of the long working
hours and being on call after hours 10 days on 4 off,
However the fours days off often allowed time to dress and go out enfemme
to other town s an hour and a half's drive from home. To doing the
grocery shopping at the supermarket or buy new women's clothing or shoes,
Of course I was eventually discovered when someone recognised who the odd
looking woman was and told my wife who was at first horrified. But over
time accepted that I was a cross dresser and the reaso