This story is a sequel to one of my first stories here on Fictionmania,
Angel was a sad medallion story about the misuse of the Medallion of
Zulo. In the earlier story, Angel was changed into an infant, forcing
her husband Ray to move on with his life raising Angel as his daughter.
While it isn't 100% necessary to read Angel, it is short enough to get
you into the characters and provide you with a background for this
story. While the first one was somewhat rushed, I feel this story more
than makes up for the earlier quickness.
Enjoy ? Anon Allsop
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Angel, A New Beginning
By Anon Allsop
The small car came to a stop as the passenger window rolled halfway
down. "You need a lift?" I bent over and looked at the driver for a
full five seconds before opening up the door and stepping in.
It was raining pretty steadily now and it didn't look like it would let
up any time soon, so I figured what the heck. "Thanks, I was getting a
bit soggy walking out there." I looked over my shoulder to see if
anyone else saw me climb into the car, no one else was around, just me
and the guy. That's when I heard a tiny sound behind me causing me to
look over my shoulder: it was a very young infant in a car seat.
The man noticed me looking at the child and smiled. "Do you like
babies?"
I shrugged my shoulders. "Sure, they're ok."
"We're heading to Nordstrom, Connecticut, ever hear of it?" he asked
trying to make small talk.
I shook my head. "I've been all over the East Coast, but never there."
I looked back toward the little one strapped into the seat. "Boy or
girl?"
"Girl," he said without looking.
We drove on for a few miles. "Your daughter's cute."
He smiled. "Yeah... uh... she looks like her mother."
I watched him take a quick glance in the mirror at her, then back to
the road. I fidgeted in the silence, then spoke to break the uneasiness
that I was feeling. "You still married?" I asked
He looked a bit sad but quickly shook it off. "Yeah, but she left me
suddenly." I knew he wanted me to just let it drop.
Again we drove on for a few miles, I cleared my throat and asked, "She
been gone long?" He didn't even bat an eye. "You're wife... she been
gone long?"
"She's been gone about a week now... she won't return." He eyed me for
a moment and continued. "What's your story?" I didn't say anything, I
just looked at the rain streaming against the window.
"Why are you out thumbing a ride in this storm... trouble at home?"
I felt very uneasy, thoughts of horror swept through my mind as I sat
quietly by this stranger. My mind raced with awful imaginings from,
murderer to kidnapper. I looked at him intently then quickly away. "Who
was he?" I wondered. "Did I just step into the car of a murderer? Where
was his wife? Why did she leave so suddenly? Did he kill her?" All
these thoughts and more, burned a streaking path through my mind as I
mulled his question to me over. "What should I say? Should I tell the
truth?" I felt my palms beginning to perspire.
I could feel him staring at me, and then he spoke again. "Are you
okay?" I felt my emotions beginning to well up into my eyes.
"Shit!" I thought as panic began to build, causing my breathing to rise
and fall rapidly. I leaned my head back into the seat, gasping for
breath like a fish.
I felt the car suddenly pull to the roadside and stop! "Calm down...
breathe... that's it..." I looked his way and slowly raised a trembling
hand to my forehead to wipe the perspiration that had beaded there.
"Slow down, you're ok," he spoke soothingly.
I looked forward, beating out a tempo, the wipers continued on their
relentless rhythm. "Panic attack?" he asked. I nodded my answer slowly.
He turned the car into a rest area. "Thought it was, I have a sister
who gets them."
I felt my jaw slowly move. "I'm okay." I don't think he believed me so
I added, "Really." He smiled and pulled into a parking place.
"You need to use the restroom?" I slowly shook my head in the negative.
"Well... smells to me like someone already has." He jerked his thumb
over his shoulder toward the baby.
He jumped out into the rain and threw the back door open. I watched him
changing the little girl; he talked and kissed her as he began to dress
her back up. He didn't seem like any of those things that I had thought
about earlier, maybe he was okay after all. He smiled at me and held up
the little baby.
"So, if you don't mind me asking, what is your story?"
He hoisted her back into the little car seat and buckled her in. "You
running from trouble?" I swallowed hard as he quickly stepped back out
and closed the door.
I could tell as soon as he got back in he wouldn't leave it alone
because he buckled up and turned his head to face me. I looked down and
toward the window as the rain created little downward trails, a steady
pounding grew against the roof of the car from the ever increasing
downpour.
I sat very sullen. "Some." He waited for me to add to it, the silence
was intense. "You could just say that I've had a falling out with my
foster parents and I'm trying to put it all behind me."
He studied me for a moment. "They're going to be looking for you then,"
was all that he said. I shrugged off my response.
"I'm not sure I need the exposure of whomever's going to be looking for
you," the man answered. "Are you hiding?"
I sighed, hanging my head. "... I'm a runaway! Now you know... so, if
you want, just take me to the Police and drop me off! They'll take me
back to those bastards and I'll run away again!" I folded my arms
defiantly and looked back out the rain soaked window.
"Somebody's mood is just like this weather!" he smiled. "I can drop you
off wherever you want me to, but I'm still on my way to Nordstrom, with
or without you."
I realized that this guy wasn't out to make my life hell, so I sat up
and smiled causing him to smile also. "That's better." He pointed to a
diaper bag and asked me to pull out a bottle for the baby. I lifted it
out and let some of the contents spill onto my arm as I checked the
temperature. "Been around kids much?" he asked, noticing what I had
done.
I held the mildly warm bottle and twisted in the seat, my intention was
just to hand the bottle to the kid but when I saw that she couldn't
hold it herself, I held it for her. The man grinned at me as he waited
for my answer.
I continued as the child drank. "Some... my foster family had a baby.
Little babies aren't so bad, at least they can't punch and hurt you."
He raised his eyebrows at my comment.
"You're running from your foster family, because of them beating you?"
His voice sounded as though he had genuine concern.
I studied him for a moment before answering. "I have a bit of a
problem, nothing too dangerous to anyone else... just me." I hoped he
wouldn't press the issue, I was wrong.
"A problem you say, like what kind of problem?" he asked. His kindness
and genuine concern were making me uneasy. I wasn't sure that I wanted
a total stranger to know what kind of things went on inside my head.
"Please, Mister, I don't want to walk in this weather, let's leave this
conversation alone for awhile. I won't do anything to hurt anyone, I am
only hurting myself with my problem." I was afraid I had already said
too much.
He pulled the car to a stop along the rain soaked highway, my first
thought was that he was going to ask me to get out. "It isn't drugs is
it?" His voice remained steady and kind.
"No, it isn't drugs," I replied trying to not give him any more
information.
He watched me for what seemed like a minute and when I reached up for
the door handle, he removed his foot from the brake and began to drive
again. "I understand the need to keep secrets, if you want to discuss
it, I'll be ready with an open mind."
We continued to drive on in the rain for a few hours, only stopping for
gas, restroom breaks and to change the little one. Around noon, we
stopped to eat lunch, when I implied that I didn't have any money, he
bought me lunch. He was a really nice guy, the kind I wished I would
have had for a father. We ate in silence as I again held the bottle for
the baby, it was the least I could do to thank him for lunch. Besides,
I didn't mind, I like babies.
He watched me like a concerned Lion for his cub, my every move was
scrutinized. After a while we became more and more comfortable and by
the time we were ready to go, our conversations became more free.
It was funny that after driving with each other for so long that we
would just now get around to asking each other our names, he got to the
question first. As we climbed back into the car he turned and asked.
"What's your name, kid?" I wasn't sure I wanted him to know but in the
light of our lunch conversation I figured I owed him that much.
"Alex...the last name really isn't important." It really wasn't, I
didn't have any family to speak of.
"Look...Alex, we're going to be in this car for about 4 more hours, if
you're headed with me, we have to start opening up. I really don't care
what kind of skeletons you have hidden, but as long as you're with me,
it doesn't really matter." I watched him speak without turning his head
from his driving.
"Now that you know my name, I guess I should be asking you what's
yours?" I figured since he knew mine, I would ask him for his, it was
only fair.
"Ray, Ray Young. Pleased to meet you." He held his hand out toward me.
I took it and we shook. He continued. "How old are you?"
"I'm 16...why?" He just shrugged his shoulders as if my age meant
nothing to him.
"Just thought I'd ask." He sounded genuine enough so I left it at that.
Every once in awhile he would glance over his shoulder at the baby in
an effort to see how she is doing. "So...what's your little girl's
name?" I asked.
"Angel." Short and to the point, spoken as he eased down an express
ramp and continued to drive, keeping up with the flow of traffic.
"That's a pretty name, don't see many girls named that." I watched his
eyes as a moment of uneasiness passed over them.
He swallowed hard, and tried to steer the conversation away from his
daughter...she, I determined, was his skeleton to hide.
"Tell me, Alex, what are your plans once I arrive in Nordstrom? Do you
have anywhere you can go?" He glanced once my way and smiled.
"I hadn't really thought about it much...I just wanted to get as far
away as I could...from the bastard who kept beating me." I replied as
truthfully as I could.
He glanced over his left shoulder and then into his rear view mirror
and changed lanes to pass a slower car.
"Well I was wondering, since you get along so well with Angel, if you
wouldn't mind helping me out for a while...I'll pay you. With me
starting a new job, I'll need a babysitter for Angel. Someone who knows
her...whom I think I can trust."
I thought about it and shrugged my shoulders. "Sure, why not. It's not
like I have anything better to do?" My answer seemed to lift a huge
weight off of his shoulders, because he seemed very pleased that I
could help.
He looked at the speedometer, and then at me. "You can live with us,
and if anyone asks, we'll just tell everyone that you're my nephew."
That was it, he turned to face the road again.
I smiled at him, then looked back attentively at Angel, I was happy.
This man had just given me something that I had really never had
before, a home. I looked outside as the rain began again, streaming
haphazardly down the window. I settled back into the seat and closed my
eyes.
***
I felt the car slow to a stop and suddenly popped my eyes open, craning
my head around I saw that we had just paused at a traffic light in a
small town. He cleared his throat and spoke. "We're here, this is
Nordstrom."
I sat up and looked after Angel. "Might as well start now," I thought.
"She's wet. I'll need to change her." He nodded and pulled into a gas
station where I could help the infant out of her soiled diaper. I
changed her as quickly as I could and we began to drive on. "Are we
close to your home?" I asked.
"Not far." He turned down a small side street and into an addition. The
houses were small but had many trees, but it was dark out so I couldn't
see anything beyond his headlights.
"It's a pretty old addition, we're up here on the left." The quiet of
the car was interrupted by the clicking of his turn signal.
We pulled to a stop as a light drizzle was falling, I picked up Angel
and headed into the shelter of their porch. Ray grabbed the diaper bag
and followed us up, sorting out the key that would let us inside.
Giving the handle a turn he pushed the door open, as it swung I stepped
inside with the baby.
"Not bad," I nodded.
"Alex, welcome to our little home, make yourself comfortable." He set
the diaper bag down and headed back outside. I took a moment to survey
the house, it wasn't anything special, just a decent little house. It
had all the normal things that you would come to expect in a home, a
kitchen, living room, bathroom, Master bedroom and a smaller bedroom. I
noticed that a crib was already set up in the corner for Angel so I
laid her gently down, trying not to awaken her.
Between the two of us, we cleaned the car out and began to empty the
boxes from Ray's little rental trailer. After about an hour we were
done, which was none too soon as Angel began to stir.
"You go on and take care of Angel, I can finish putting this away." I
quickly turned and sought out the crying child.
I changed her again and warmed up another bottle, sitting myself down
in a rocker I gave the bottle to Angel as Ray continued to put things
away. I wished that I could help him as it was getting late and he
still had a few hours of unpacking left.
I put the little one on my shoulder and began to pat her back as I
rocked. "Why don't you just put away what you have to, we can both work
on it tomorrow?"
He paused, looking at me.
"That's not a bad idea, I'll look for the sheets so I can make the
beds. It's been quite a long time since I've gotten much sleep, we've
been making this trip back and forth, the past 3 days. Each day, I
fixed the house a little bit more." He glanced around and smiled. "At
least we won't have to do that anymore." He began to move boxes to the
side as he looked for the box with the sheets in them. "Here it is!" He
pulled out the sheet set and threw it to the side.
He stood and grinned at me while I gave her the bottle. "Angel, my
wife, would love to be doing what you're doing right now." I returned
his smile but felt a bit guilty knowing that his wife was gone and I
was doing something that she should have been doing.
"Your wife's name was Angel too?" I watched him nod. "Not very many
girls are named after their mothers."
He inhaled deeply. "Well, with this one, let's just say it's a bit
different situation." He smiled weakly and continued to unfold the
sheets.
We quickly made up the crib and put Angel down for the evening, I hoped
she would sleep all night as I was very tired and I wanted to sleep
right away. Ray made up the big bed and I stood in the darkened nursery
rubbing Angel's back, marveling at just how tiny she was. She couldn't
have been more that two or three weeks old. Her light blonde hair
created tiny ringlets of curls around her ears, she was so adorable
that I knew she would grow into a very beautiful woman.
Ray whispered from the hallway that everything was ready and we should
really go to bed, I tip-toed out of her room and followed him into the
living room. He directed my attention toward the couch. "You can bunk
there until I can come up with a proper bed for you." I thanked him as
he headed back to the nursery. He gently leaned over and kissed his
small daughter, and headed to bed.
I stretched out on the couch and turned off the lamp, laying there in
the dark I wondered just why Angel left this seemingly wonderful man?
Ray's every action around that little girl, was of love and parental
honor. It was too bad that his wife left him and the little girl, alone
and in a new city. My thoughts dwelled on the subject until sleep
finally claimed me.
***
Sleep came fitfully for me as usual, I felt myself falling into a pit
of blackness that had become my life. Faces that I had known, flashed
before me mocking the person that I desperately wanted to be, each
laughing at the creature that stood before them.
The fog that held my dream also held in the feelings that I recalled,
those very ones that caused me to be the scourge of the families that I
had known. I felt myself crying from the laughter, the emotional strain
too much to bear. Suddenly thrust out of the ever-swirling fog was the
face of my foster father, spitting his evil venomous words at me.
"Freaking queer! Fag! Sissy!" I heard him shout again and again. I held
my hands over my ears in a vain attempt to shut out his shouting, each
refrain louder than the last.
Suddenly, like a shaft of light out of the inky darkness, within my
dream, I heard a voice, calm and controlled. "Angel, don't be afraid,
I'll take care of you." When I turned I was looking at Ray, he smiled
and stood there holding the baby, who was blowing bubbles from her tiny
mouth.
I felt the blanket that had been covering me slide off onto the floor.
As it did, I woke up and calmly picked it up and pushed it to the end
of the couch. I ran my hands through my hair and slowly stood,
stretching away the sleep still in my system. I scratched my head and
staggered into the kitchen where I filled a glass with cold water and
sipped at it, allowing the cool contents of the glass to sooth my dry
throat.
Slowly I made my way to the nursery where I checked the infant in my
care; she was sleeping soundly. I gently pulled the covers up onto her
tiny shoulders, smiling as I wondered if she would ever realize how
lucky she really was. I gently stroked her soft cheek as I watched her
sleep, the soft ringlets of hair moving with the rhythm of her gentle
breathing.
Whether it was my touch, or her knowing I was in the room, Angel opened
her eyes and began to kick her feet wildly as a slow smile spread
across her chubby face. I couldn't resist the smile from enveloping me
as well, I gently lifted the baby from the crib and carried her to the
changing table.
The soft glow from her night light was all the light we needed to
quickly change her tiny bottom and 'talk' to each other as only she and
I could. I gathered her up and walked back into the kitchen where I
pulled out her bottle to warm up, her bright and intelligent eyes
gleamed and sparkled from the diffused light that entered into the
windows. I pulled a pan from the cupboard and filled it with enough
water to warm her bottle, then sat it on the stove to heat.
As I moved about the kitchen I kissed the top of her head and smiled as
her fine hair tickled at my nose. After a few minutes, I tested the
bottle and was satisfied that it would be safe for her to drink. We
returned to the living room where I took a seat in the recliner and
watched her hungrily gulp down the milk that was offered to her in the
bottle.
Her tiny fingers wrapped around my thumb as I held the bottle for her,
while her other played with one blonde lock of her fine hair. I smiled
and kissed the top of her little head as she continued to drink, I knew
that I was falling for this little girl, she would soon have my heart
wrapped around her little finger, and I really didn't care.
I truly wished that I could share one thing with this young charge of
mine, and that would be, to be...female. If I were only her mother,
then I could have the best of both worlds, my fantasy world, and real
life. I bent down to rub my nose against hers. "I wish I was your real
Mommy," I whispered to her.
I felt my eyes welling with tears and blinked them away. "If I would
only have been born like you, then maybe my life wouldn't have been so
bad." My trembling voice cracked with the emotion that was welling up
inside of me. "I would give up everything to be like you...Angel." A
lone tear fell from my cheek and landed on her soft sleeper outfit.
"Instead...of...this."
I wiped my tears away on her blanket. "Oh well, at least I have you." I
smiled at Angel and kissed her little hand; the smell of baby lotion
and powder brought only good memories to my mind. "Let's you and I
pretend that I'm your Mommy, when we're alone, we will be mother and
daughter. No one else needs to know." I pulled her close and softly
cried into her tiny shoulder.
We sat like that until almost 3:00 am, then I carried her back into the
nursery and placed her into the crib where I covered her back up. A
gentle stroke of her hair and I left for the couch where I quickly fell
back into a more restful sleep.
***
I rolled over and opened my eyes at a brightly lit room, because the
sun was streaming across the couch and shining against the wall. I sat
up and went in to check on Angel, but she was sound asleep. I knew that
Ray most likely would had to have given her a bottle sometime during
the early morning as I was never awakened by her crying. I felt a pang
of sadness that I wasn't the one to have taken care of Angel. I walked
into the kitchen and began a pot of coffee for our breakfast. I started
searching out a skillet for eggs, once I got the bacon going, I quickly
went into the bedroom to ask Ray how many eggs he wanted me to fix, his
bed was empty.
I turned and headed back to the kitchen where I noticed a note laying
on the table. Picking it up I began to read. "Alex, I was called in to
work early, so I decided to let you sleep. I'll stop at the store and
get some things for Angel and some supper for us, I'll be back around
7:00. Angel has already been changed and given a bottle so she should
sleep for awhile. We can unpack when I get home. Thanks, Ray."
I just shrugged my shoulders and went back to making breakfast. One
real benefit was that while I was still alone with Angel, I could help
Ray put away some of the boxes of clothing and odds and ends that he
put off until this morning. The first box I picked up was completely
full of baby clothes. I carried them into the nursery and put them
away. The next box was of what appeared to be his wife's old stuff, I
carried that into the bedroom and set it down. I quickly looked around
the room and opened the box, I couldn't help myself from running my
hands inside its silky contents.
I relished the texture of the silks and fine materials, again my mind
wandered to my one sided conversation with Angel late last night. As I
marveled at the sleek feel of the silky garments, something within the
box scratched me and I caught hold of it and pulled it out. I lifted a
small baggie out of the box. Inside was a dull looking necklace
attached to a long chain. I opened the bag and pulled it out by the
chain. I smiled and turned toward the mirror while I slid it over my
head, I imagined myself as a girl wearing the necklace.
Unable to resist the desire to encase myself in this woman's silky
finery I cautiously looked over my shoulder at the door. I knew better,
but being this close to beautiful feminine clothing without anyone to
stop me, I couldn't fight the urge.
It wouldn't look right with the shirt I had on, so I pulled that off
and grabbed out one of the blouses I had found with a low neck. Quickly
I threw it over my shoulders and began to button it up, I couldn't
fight my need. That was the true reason I kept getting beat at my old
foster home, I liked wearing female clothes and they hated me for it.
My foster father caught me with his daughter's clothes on one morning
that he passed her bedroom, after that, my life was hell.
As soon as the cloth touched the necklace I felt a sharp tingle that
quickly shot down my arms and legs causing me to jump. In a panic I
jerked away from the garment and threw it down on the floor, thinking
that it was a spider that may have bitten me. I kicked the blouse with
my toes and I didn't see anything crawl from it, I quickly scanned the
floor to see where it had scurried.
I turned toward the mirror and studied my reflection, something was
certainly not right. I watched as my eyes slowly began to lighten, they
went from brown to a sky blue, what was happening? I could feel my
heart racing as I continued to watch the subtle changes happening to
them. My eyes glanced toward my forehead as the few wispy hairs that
hung down gradually became lighter and lighter, then longer! I grabbed
onto the dresser as I felt my knees grow weaker. "Wh... what's
happening to me?" I trembled, speaking only in a whisper.
My eyes were suddenly drawn toward my exposed chest, the small pink
dime sized nipples I had, were slowly expanding outward and turning a
dusky brown color! I leaned toward the mirror and watched them slowly
began to swell and hang from my chest as gravity slowly took over! More
and more they descended until there could be no mistake, I was growing
breasts!
The hair on my legs began to disappear quickly, and was replaced by the
silky smooth feel of a woman's skin! I ran my slender hand along my
arm, wondering just what I had done to cause this change to happen! I
studied my hand before my eyes, it had become slim and graceful with
long feminine fingers. I looked back down and saw the necklace gently
resting between my newly grown breasts.
After the initial shock, I began to smile with a giddy anticipation of
what was to come next. It was as if I was suddenly living all of my
fantasies rolled into one very brief moment of time.
I began to look over my body and the changes that had been dealt over
the past twenty minutes. I scooted to the edge of the bed and hung my
head, hair fell onto my lap, cascading and shimmering into a golden
blonde pool of silky hair. A quick search confirmed my suspicions, gone
was the usual cumbersome equipment that I had known all of my life, I
was now very female between my legs! My unfettered breasts swung free
as I approached the mirror, slowly as if I was creeping in on some
ferocious wild beast.
"What's happened? This...this is impossible!" I said to myself as my
voice had come to match my body, very feminine and sexy. I gracefully
turned my head from side to side and watched the golden tresses slide
across my back and shoulder. Again, I looked toward the little medal
that hung from my long and slender neck. "Did you do this to me?" I ran
a long nail over the winged cherub that was embossed on its surface.
I couldn't believe what was happening to me while the transformation
continued; while my face became more and more lovely, the blonde hair
slowly grew from my head until it almost touched my thin waist. I was
gorgeous! For once in my life I really felt happy, because this
wonderful accident was an answer to my prayer!
Slowly peeling out of my boxers, I began to search through Angel's
clothes for items to wear. I felt a bit out of place doing so, but for
the first time, I somehow knew that the clothes that I would wear,
could actually fit my body in the way they were intended.
I smiled as I slid a very sexy panty up my legs and let it rest on my
now shapely hips. A matching bra followed as I found myself becoming
aroused in my excitement. The silky white material was beautiful
against the golden tanned color of my skin. I looked back into the
mirror, I could see some subtle changes still working across my body.
My eyes had changed from their normal boring look, to one that would
captivate and hold any male under their gaze. The lashes were long and
dark, curling upward ever so gently. My lips had even gone through a
change of their own, the thin boyish lips that I was accustomed were
gradually replaced with lush and full lips that looked to be very kiss-
able indeed.
I pulled a blouse out and quickly slipped it over my head, the neckline
was low enough to show off a hint cleavage in a extremely sexy way, but
not so low that it looked slutty. A small tremor of excitement raced
through my body as I spied the little necklace that was nestled in the
deep expanse of my new breasts.
I began to dig into another box and found a pair of low hip hugging
jeans in a sexy light blue denim, which I slowly began to pull them up
my now silky legs. Finally, fully able to realize a fantasy of mine,
wearing female clothes and actually having them fit the way they were
meant to be. I looked back into the mirror and smiled, the grin slowly
spreading across the most gorgeous face I had ever seen.
Walking back into the living room, I sought out a box of shoes, I
pulled out sandals and put them on my dainty feet. Finally, for the
first time in my life I felt complete, I was rendered beautiful, and
female. I felt that God had finally answered my prayer, and released me
into the life that I was destined to have.
I sat down on the recliner and leaned back into the chair with a
enormous and giddy smile dancing across my face. I wondered if the girl
I had become was somehow locked into me, which the little charm finally
released. "Who was she?" I wondered to myself as I let my fingers
slowly trace the opening of my shirt down across my lovely breasts.
I leaned my head back allowing the hair to fall loosely onto my arm, as
I began to flip it back over my shoulder, my eyes caught sight of a
photo sitting on a little table. It was of Ray, standing next to a
female who appeared to look exactly like me. "Oh...oh my God!" I
thought. It had to be Angel, I had somehow been changed into
Angel...his wife!
Suddenly a wash of anguish came like a tidal wave over me, I realized
that if Angel had left Ray, there was no way in hell that he would let
me stay like this! I wasn't even sure that I could change back, even if
I could. I looked at the photo again, he had his arm gently around
my... her waist, holding her protectively. I could almost feel his hand
there right now, but that would be impossible knowing that I had never
taken a picture with him.
I was torn between knowing that I couldn't stay like this and wanting
desperately to remain in this form, forever. I stood up, then walked to
a mirror hanging in the living room, slowly drinking in the reflection
of a beautiful woman looking back at me.
"Well, at least I know what the real Angel looked like." My soft
feminine voice sounded strange to my ears.
My eyes fell on the little medallion. "I'll bet you're what caused this
change to me." I walked back into the bedroom and sought out the baggie
that had held the medallion, gently, I removed it and dropped it back
inside the clear plastic bag.
I slowly began to brush my lovely hair and relished the feeling of not
just wearing women's clothes, but actually having them fit me properly.
The wonderful feeling of being encased in this feminine form was like a
glorious song being played over and over, I never wanted it to stop.
Slowly, I drew a delicately manicured finger down my gentle sloping
breast into my deep cleavage. "Ray would never let me remain this way.
Anyway, what would happen when the real Angel saw me, that could be
very uncomfortable for her to see an exact twin."
I heard the little one began to stir and walked back into the nursery
to pick her up. I bent down and drew her up to my shoulder and walked
her to the changing table. There I placed her down and quickly changed
her diaper. She smiled and kicked her dainty little feet in excitement.
I bent down low and rubbed my nose upon hers. "How's little Angel this
morning?"
I kissed her soft cheek and she pulled at the golden hair that brushed
her tiny hand. I smiled and realized that this was an answer to my
prayer, now I could actually live the life of a beautiful woman every
day of the year. If only I could talk Ray into letting me stay this way
forever or at least as long as I was in his house.
But how would I know if I could ever regain my original body back? I
had no real way of knowing whether I would remain this way forever.
That thought permeated through my head. "Would that be at all bad?" I
smiled at the thought of looking like this little infant's mother, then
a thought occurred to me. "How's... how's my little Angel?" I loved the
sound of that coming from my soft lips. "My little Angel."
I picked up the little girl and carried her into the kitchen. "Come on,
Angel, I'll fix up a bottle for you" And so began a day that I would
cherish for my entire life. All throughout that day and well into the
afternoon I played 'Mommy' to the tiny baby. By evening, though, I
began to wonder what I would tell Ray. I wasn't sure if it really was
the small medallion that had caused these changes to me but I had hoped
that it was, at least that would explain what had happened.
I had fallen so easily into the role of a woman that it almost startled
me, as the day progressed I became to act more and more comfortable
that it became second nature. I didn't care about the old Alex that had
stumbled onto the medallion during the morning, this was as an answer
to a prayer! I wanted to stay like this forever, I didn't look at it
like being trapped, I felt it was more like a genuine release from the
shell that I had been stuck into for the past 16 years, well, at least
the last four anyway.
I sat there cuddling with Angel and kissing her small face as she slept
cradled in my slender arms, she was beginning to stir and I was
becoming concerned. I knew that Ray had mentioned that he was going to
stop by the store and purchase some items for Angel after work, I just
hoped that formula was one of them. I pulled my sexy long legs under me
and smiled as Angel held onto my little finger trying to pull it into
her mouth to suckle.
I checked the clock again. "Daddy will be home in about an hour or so,
I sure hope we can wait until then."
I tried to put a pacifier into her mouth but she made a face and spit
it out, it fell past her ear and bounced onto the couch.
"I don't blame you at all honey, I wouldn't want that plastic thing in
my mouth either."
I picked her up and walked back and forth in the living room. "I sure
hope your daddy doesn't want me to go back to being Alex," I said as I
rocked her in my arms. "I want to stay with you and remain like this
forever!"
I smiled as she kept nuzzling my rounded bosom, knowing full well what
she was after. I looked at the clock and shook my head at the little
bundle in my arms and smiled.
"Where can your Daddy be?"
She frowned, starting to sob softly. "I know... I know... you're
getting hungry," I whispered, kissing her tenderly.
I kept rocking the little girl while watching the clock as I waited for
her father to come home. "I wonder what he's going to say when he sees
his former wife holding their little daughter."
I frowned as her cries became louder. "Come on Ray, get back with the
formula," I pleaded, quickening my pacing in the living room, again
glancing at the clock. "It's almost 8:00, and you need to eat." I
sighed to the whimpering infant in my arms.
My stomach was all twisted up. I wanted to help her, but struggled with
what I knew she needed and not being able to help her at all.
Again I slowly began to pace back and forth from the living room into
the hallway, after turning around at the end of the hall I noticed a
box of clothes, there laying inside the box was a brand new maternity
bra, still with the tags.
"I wonder," I said as I bent down and picked it up. It was still
pristine white and apparent that it had never been worn, still dangling
the maker's size and labels. "Your mommy must have bought it before she
ran out on Daddy."
I carried the bra into the bedroom where I had placed the little
medallion inside the baggie. Looking from one item to the other, I
thought. "I wonder if this could work?" I placed Angel down on the
center of the bed and gently lifted the medallion out of the package. I
placed both the bra and the medallion on the dresser. Slowly I
unbuttoned the blouse I was wearing and cut the tags from the new bra.
I slipped my shoulders into the straps and let my pert young breasts I
had grown accustomed to, fall into the larger cups. "Well here goes," I
reached out and grabbed the chain letting the small charm swing free.
I closed my eyes and said a silent prayer asking the Lord to grant me
one more desperate wish, this time for the baby. I opened my eyes and
allowed the small medallion to gently lay along my sloping breast and
touch the cup of the bra. I could feel a soft tingle dance across my
chest. I quickly placed the medal back into the baggie for the
protection of both of us. Looking down, I hoped and prayed that my
breast was the only thing changed, but as they say, desperate times
call for desperate measures. I prayed that my hunch was right. I
waited, knowing that the crying infant needed milk and right now, at
this point, I didn't care how she got it. I just knew that it was the
one thing that I could try, besides, if her Mother was here right now
she would have probably just breast fed her long ago. I wanted to help,
and this was the only way I knew of doing it.
I watched my chest as the loose fitting cups began to fill with my own
growing breasts, as each bosom slowly began to stretch and become
uncomfortable with the additional milk that Angel desperately needed. I
slipped the blouse I had been wearing back on and unhooked the small
tab that held the small bra flap covering my slowly engorging breast.
Gently I picked up the crying infant and moved her to my swollen teat.
The child quickly began to nuzzle me and it only took a moment before
she latched on and began to suckle.
I have read stories where the individual who breastfed an infant acted
as it was such a pleasurable experience to nurse. This was miles beyond
that! It hurt, and the little one was frantically pulling on me, almost
bringing tears to my eyes. For a moment, I contemplated what I had just
gotten myself into, but then, I would probably have done this anyway,
knowing our predicament.
It wasn't without a great deal of pain that I held the nursing infant,
then the two of us returned to the living room and sat down in the big
recliner. I pulled an afghan down to cover the contented child and help
me with my chilly arms as she nursed vigorously. I winced, then talked
softly to the little child working feverishly on my sore nipples.
The only sounds either made at that special moment, was the soft
sucking and swallowing of the infant and the creaking of the chair we
both were in. I felt her relax her hold on my breast, and begin to get
heavy. I knew she was falling asleep, full and content. I quietly
lifted her to my shoulder and began to pat her back like I had seen so
many mothers do, she chirped out her burp and rubbed her tiny face
against my shoulder. I smiled and began to hum a soft song as we
started to rock gently in the big chair, I found myself drifting off to
sleep as well.
******
Deep within my dreams, I heard keys jingling and being inserted into
the door, slowly the handle was being turned. I realized then that it
wasn't a dream and in reality, Ray was finally returning home. The
predicament that I was in never even crossed my mind, when the door
swung open and Ray walked in holding two bags. I could hear him setting
the groceries down in the kitchen, then with a sleigh-bell like sound,
dropped his keys onto the counter.
"It's just me!" he yelled out. I could hear him come around the corner
as I began to get my wits about me. Suddenly I felt panic as I realized
that he would see me dressed and looking like his wife! What would he
think when he saw me? I panicked, trying to get up from the chair.
"Hey Alex, I hope you don't mind Chinese, I stopped at a litt..." He
froze, short of the living room. "Angel? My God, but... but how?" he
said as he looked from me to his tiny daughter.
He slowly walked closer and looked down at the sleeping child, then
back up into my face. "Alex?" He spoke softly as he realized who I was,
the surprise evident in his voice.
"I'm sorry, I found a necklace in a box... I think it did this to me."
I raised the sleeping child to my shoulder and pulled my shirt closed.
He kept staring at me with his startled expression as he backed into
the couch and sat down. "I knew I should have thrown that damn thing
away before it hurt someone else!" He frowned and looked at the floor.
I knelt down still holding Angel. "It wasn't any fault of yours." I
looked down with embarrassment. "It was all my own doing."
He gave me a quizzical look.
"I should have told you before, I'm sorry that I kept this from you." I
looked at the sleeping girl in my arms. "Let me put her in bed, then I
can explain."
I stood slowly and started off toward the nursery with Ray following
close behind. Carefully I laid her down, pulling her blanket up around
her tiny shoulders. Before I realized what I was doing, I had bent down
and kissed her soft rosy cheek.
When I looked up, he was leaning against the door, light reflecting
upon a single tear rolling down his cheek and with a trembling finger,
he wiped it away. "She would have given her very soul to be able to do
what you just did."
I looked back at Angel. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean..."
"Don't be." He sighed as he wiped his eyes again with the back of his
thumb.
He stepped back and allowed me to pass first, almost making me feel
like his gallant act was what any man would do for a woman. We both
slowly walked to the kitchen and began to silently put away his
groceries, all the while he kept watching me.
I tried to reach up to the top of the cupboard to place a can of
formula, then realized that now I was much too short to reach that
high. I suddenly felt him move in behind me, taking it from my hand and
place it on the shelf. His other hand had balanced against my waist for
gentle support. I looked down at his large hand on my hip.
"Sorry Angel... uh... Alex, I didn't mean..." His face flushed from
embarrassment.
"It's okay," I stammered, then turned around quickly to face him. That
wasn't much better, my sudden movement caused him to lose his balance
and fall forward only to catch himself by grabbing out at the counter
top. I looked down, each of his arms were bracing themselves against
the counter, with me trapped in the middle.
He paused for only a moment, then quickly backed away, trying to
maintain his composure. "God, I'm such a klutz," he mumbled.
"No you're not, it was an accident." I had to admit that I enjoyed it
in some warped weird way.
He shook his head and began to fill up the coffee pot with water. "So,
how'd it happen?" he asked. I had a weird feeling that he knew and yet,
was hiding something from me.
I leaned back against the counter and replayed the whole afternoon to
him, from the moment I found the medallion to when I used it against
the new maternity bra.
"So you used it within the last three or so hours?" I nodded my reply.
"Well, then, you're stuck like that, probably until sometime in the wee
hours of the morning."
I looked at the floor toward my tiny feet. "I wouldn't look at it as
being stuck." There, finally I was truthful to both him and myself.
He had been scooping coffee into the filter, then paused to look at me.
"What's that supposed to mean, you like looking that way?" He sat the
scoop down on the counter and pushed it away from the edge. "Are you
saying that you 'LIKE' looking like Angel?"
I really didn't know how to say it, but I knew for the first time in my
life I actually liked what I was, only the fear of what his reply would
be scared me. Tears began to flow. "I... this... this is why I kept
getting beaten at my foster home."
He had just finished pouring water into the coffee maker and sat the
pot back in to catch the coffee. "You were beaten because of wanting to
dress like a woman?"
"I'm sorry!" I cried. "I know you must hate me for what I've done!" I
felt myself wanting to take a step away from him, more of a reflex
through years of conditioning that my former foster family had dealt
me. Somehow I stayed my ground, thinking that maybe, just maybe, Ray
would be different.
Instead of attacking me as I had been programmed to assume, he just
slightly shook his head and laughed. "What... for wearing a woman's
clothes? Not hardly." He smiled and pointed toward the nursery. "She
changed me into a woman with that same damn necklace. I know exactly
where you're coming from... only, with me... I never wanted to do it
again." He pulled down two cups and set them alongside the coffee
maker. "With you..."
"I've always wanted to be like this," I interrupted, feeling a bit more
confident, wiping my tears and allowing myself to smile.
I took the cup as he began to pour coffee into it and cleared my
throat. "I wouldn't mind staying... like this... if you don't..." I
forced a smile, afraid of the answer I was so sure that I was about to
hear.
He took a sip of his own cup and smiled. "It could have its
benefits..."
I gave him a surprised look trying to guess what was on his mind. I
watched his expression slowly change from amusement to a sudden
realization to what I had been thinking.
"Oh... no... No... you have it all wrong." He held his hand out in
front of him as if warding off a charging lion. "I would have no
interest in sex with you, but you... you would give me an alibi, and
provide the real Angel with a mother."
"The real Angel?" I opened my eyes wide with surprise. "Then the
baby...?"
"That's right, she's my wife... Angel." He frowned and looked down at
the floor.
"I guess there's a story behind all of this." I drew a circle in the
air between us. "If you want to discuss it, I'll listen." He looked at
me and pursed his lips in thought. Shrugging his shoulders he took a
sip from his cup and begin to explain.
"Angel wanted me to know how it feels to be a woman, she turned me into
one without me even consenting. We went out, danced with some guys at a
bar, then when we were finally home, she and I were sitting around
talking about kids. I don't really remember why, but she used that damn
medallion on me much in the same way you did to yourself. Before I knew
it, my breasts were so full of milk that I couldn't stand it."
He sighed, again sipping his coffee. "If you would have used the one I
had on then, my guess is that you wouldn't have become Angel, but
rather the woman I had been. At least, that's how I think that thing
works."
"Then she went and did the thing that I'll regret for the rest of my
life." He looked toward the darkened window, reflecting the lighting
from the kitchen. I waited as he continued. "She went and made herself
into a baby, a newborn."
"Can you change her back?" I asked.
"Oh sure, she'll look every bit as beautiful as you are now, only
problem is, when her intelligence was compressed into that tiny brain,
much of what she knew and remembered was pushed from her mind. Simple
things like muscle control, bodily functions, all gone. Angel was
basically a vegetable." Tears begin welling in the corners of his eyes.
"But, she's just a baby... she'll grow," I tried to reassure him.
"That's true, but I'll have to wait until I'm an old man to enjoy her
again, by that time..." He sighed.
"You're afraid that she won't love you anymore?" I asked.
His nod said it all. "I thought about putting one of my shirts in a
plastic bag and sealing it, using it later when she was my age
again..."
"Why don't you?" I interjected.
He just smiled and again turned his attention toward the window.
"That seems simple enough to me," I continued.
He sighed deeply. "I'm afraid that after twenty-five years of raising
her like a daughter, I don't think I could ever become romantically
involved with her again." His eyes were again, welling with tears as he
spoke. I looked away.
He smiled weakly, took a sip of his coffee and gave me the once over.
"Well, at least you'll be able to get your wish."
I gave him a surprised look. "You mean, you're going to let me stay
this way?"
"Why not?" He shrugged. "It'll help so I won't have to make up excuses
to where Angel went." He smiled.
I stood there watching him, suddenly feeling strangely warm.
"Besides, somebody will have to take care of the baby," he replied
softly, pushing a stray tear from the corner of his eye.
I looked toward the infant's bedroom and nodded. "That's true, it would
help explain her," trying to ignore his obvious pain.
He walked over next to me, placing his cup on the counter. "Could you
do that for her?" I nodded my reply as he leaned against the counter
and vacantly stared in the direction of the nursery. "I can't believe
you used that thing on yourself so you could feed her, pretty selfless
if you ask me."
"It was the only thing I could think of at the time." I was suddenly
feeling like a trembling child again.
He turned toward me slowly and studied my face, or rather Angel's face.
No words were spoken between the two of us. He looked on for almost two
full minutes, before timidly taking his trembling hand up and let his
fingers slowly pull through my long blonde hair, causing me to inhale
deeply. It felt as though my knees would buckle.
"Sorry about that." He quickly pulled his hand away, as he realized
what he was doing. "It's just been so long."
He looked away embarrassed; I knew that my nearness was having an
effect on him, the swell in his jeans showed me that fact. I saw him
trying to hide it from my view as he tried to change the subject.
He quietly walked into the living room. "I'm going to have to talk to
you like I would have spoken to Angel, you know that, don't you?"
"That's fine... I don't mind. I imagine it would be hard not doing it
anyway." I followed him into the room. "What about the baby... uh, your
wife?"
He sighed and walked to her bedroom door. "I'll just tell everyone that
she's our daughter." I looked around him at the sleeping infant. "It
should be easy enough to convince people." I knew he was right, it
wouldn't be all too hard to let them think that she was our child.
"I don't know how I'm going to explain this to our families though," he
continued quietly.
"When did you last see them?" I wondered aloud.
"Four maybe five months ago, why?" He leaned against the doorway facing
me.
I also leaned against the opposite doorway. "She looks like a tiny
baby, maybe you could just tell them that I was hiding it?" He nodded
slowly.
"That might work," He grinned. "Most of my family knew she wanted a
baby, they all felt bad knowing we had been trying without any luck."
He turned his head back to me slowly. "You know you'll need to keep
breastfeeding her, for the duration if we try to pull this off."
I couldn't help my grin. "I don't mind."
He grew quiet and stood there studying me, again saying nothing.
Turning, I looked back at the sleeping girl. "What about birth
certificates and items like that?" I felt him move behind me to look
over my shoulder, his body close to mine. "She'll need a birth
certificate since she can't use her old one anymore."
"We'll just tell them that she was born at home," he said, the
vibrations of his voice dancing within my ears causing a tingle to race
along my spine. "She only looks about a week old, any test would prove
that she's got your genes, literally."
I felt him inhale deeply. "God you even smell like her." I felt myself
smile.
"I... I don't think we should call her 'Angel' though." He spoke softly
so he wouldn't wake her. "That name is already taken."
"By whom?" I responded, then felt like a stereotypical blonde for doing
so. Then it was my turn to try and change the subject quickly. "But
what should we call her?" I asked quietly.
"How about Alexandria? Then we could call her Alex and use your old
name?" Ray wondered out loud.
"No, please don't use that name on her," I replied angrily. Then I said
softly. "Whatever you pick is fine with me. After all, she is your
child, you have a greater right to choose a name for her."
"Why? If you have to play the wife for however long, you need to be a
part of this as well." He folded his arms across his chest and looked
at the nursery door.
"What's my middle name?" I asked, then realized what I had just said.
"I mean, what was Angel's middle name?"
He gently rubbed my shoulder and spoke. "You're going to have to quit
thinking like that. YOU are Angel now, SHE isn't anymore." He paused
and looked away, I could tell that he was missing her terribly.
"From this point forward, Alex doesn't exist. Angel is married to me."
I tried to hide a slow smile. "And that baby in there is OUR daughter."
His face showed the seriousness of the whole situation.
"Okay," I said in a small voice. "How about naming her, Abigail?" That
suggestion was met with a short laugh.
"Her cousin was named Abigail, Angel hated that cousin." He rubbed his
square chin. "We'll have to give her a name that fits her."
"What about, Cassandra? We could call her Casey for short." He wrinkled
his nose and laughed. "Okay, I give up!" I said throwing my slender
hands into the air.
He laughed again and shook his head. "Angel used to do that same
gesture, when she grew frustrated with me." His eyes locked on to mine.
"I guess I'll probably never really get over losing her."
"You didn't lose her," I calmly pointed toward the nursery. "She's in
there."
An uncomfortable silence shrouded the both of us, I finally broke
through its thin veneer. "How about Melody?" He just looked at me. I
smiled. "I guess not."
I slowly moved to the couch and he followed. "What about the name,
Brandi?"
He paused and slowly smiled. "I like that, and I think she would too.
It's feminine and pretty."
I touched him lightly on the arm. "I like that name." His eyes darted
to my hand, which I quickly pulled away.
He patted the arm of the chair, still looking at where I touched him on
the arm. "I guess then, since we're both in agreement, Brandi it is!"
******
The days slowly merged into weeks, then months. Ray, baby Brandi and I
settled into our roles quite easily. He had let his family know that we
had a baby and named her Brandi. They were surprised that we kept it
hidden so well, but they understood, because of all the problems the
'real' Angel was having trying to conceive.
It was pretty easy for us to get a birth certificate for Brandi,
especially when they could tell that I was still breastfeeding our
little daughter. I fell into the role of doting mother so quickly that
it scared both of us.
My parents...er, Angel's parents visited us almost as soon as they
found out. Thankfully, they didn't stay with us and we were able to
keep our sleeping arrangements hidden.
In that entire time, Ray not once ever made advances on me. I never did
anything to encourage him either, we each had a role in the family and
stuck to it pretty well. The only time we ever showed affection toward
each other was while we were attending functions within the
neighborhood or his job. Any other time, it was business as usual.
******
It had almost been a year when I walked Brandi down to the mail box. We
opened it up and with me holding her, she pulled out the mail with her
chubby little fingers.
"Mom...mom...mom, mom, mom." She fired out the word in rapid
succession, making me smile. The small stack of envelopes went straight
to her mouth.
"No, no honey, those aren't good for baby!" I gently tugged it from
her. She pouted and when I smiled she quickly turned away and threw her
arms around my neck, still facing away, trying to 'pretend' to be mad.
I walked back into the house and laid the letters on the table, put
Brandi down and began to fix our lunch. Brandi was now pulling herself
up to the kitchen chairs, her unsteady legs getting stronger and
stronger with each passing day.
I glanced back over my shoulder at her and was awarded with a toothy
smile...well, as toothy as an 11 month old can get. She was so excited
at her accomplishment that she caused me to smile. I crouched low so
she could move toward me. As she stumbled, fell and walked, into my
arms I squeezed her tightly. "How's Mommy's little girl?" I kissed her
soft cheek. "Such a big girl!" I smiled as I put her into the
highchair.
I carried a small bottle of juice over to her and sat it down, she
picked it up and began to suck down the cool contents. "Is that yummy?"
I brushed her golden hair from her forehead, and sat a tiny Vanilla
Wafer in front of her. Almost immediately she began to slobber all over
it and had it crushed beyond recognition, still, she cherished her
cookie or, at least what had survived the attack.
I walked back into the kitchen and carried back our lunch. "Here you go
punkin," I said as I sat the little sandwich wedges down in front of
her, each cut into very small bite sized pieces. As we ate, I took the
time to glance through the mail. Nested in the middle was a letter from
Ray's parents who lived on the coast, in Northern Oregon.
I took a nail and gently tore open the white envelope. I heard a noise
in the living room as Ray walked in from the garage.
I smiled as he jostled Brandi's hair. "What you got there?"
"Me or Brandi?" I asked, then seeing that she was offering her father a
bite of her deformed sandwich. "Oh..." I laughed as he pretended to eat
her sandwich and part of her arm, making her break out into a fit of
hearty giggles.
"Look Ray, it's a letter from your parents!" I held it up to him, he
slowly took it and leaned against the counter to read.
"Did you read this?"
I shook my head no in reply.
"They're coming here to visit, because they want to see their little
Granddaughter."
I smiled and passed Brandi her bottle again.
"That's great! Brandi should get to know her Grandparents." I took my
index finger and gently touched Brandi's nose causing her to try and
grab my finger.
"But, they want to stay here! In our house!"
I gave him a quick look. "Yeah, that's right, where they going to
sleep?"
"We don't really have the room, Ray." I began to worry. "Where WILL
they sleep?"
"We'll figure something out," he said thinking hard. "Maybe we could
convert the garage into a room?"
I drummed my fingers against the table, the nails tapping, sounding
like a trotting horse. "That might work, I know it's been done before.
I could help you when Brandi is sleeping." I looked from her to him.
"How long before they're coming here?"
He looked at the letter. "Next month, the 12th. Looks like they'll only
be staying a week though." He read further. "Uh-oh."
"What is it?" I paused as I fought with Brandi's little hands, trying
to keep them out of her applesauce.
"While they're here, they want to do some house hunting."
I had been trying to wipe the applesauce from Brandi's face when she
pulled the washcloth from my grasp and was using it as a hat. I looked
up at Ray who was watching our little battle, and smiling.
"She's got more on her, than in her stomach!" I giggled, as she began
to try and wipe her own face. Then looking back toward Ray. "It would
be nice for you to have your parents a bit closer, wouldn't it?"
"Yeah, it would, I really miss them." He stepped around to the other
side of Brandi and tried to distract her so I could finish cleaning her
up. "Their moving closer would probably save us money on our phone
bill."
I nodded as I took our dishes into the kitchen. Ray picked Brandi up
and carried her off to change her. "I'll hurry up and start cleaning
out the garage as soon as I'm done here, we have to get this project
underway pretty soon if we'll have that room ready for them by the
12th."
I followed the sound of his voice back to the nursery, leaning against
the door I smiled at them. Ray was blowing against Brandi's stomach
causing her to squeal and kick in laughter. I found myself giggling
over their antics.
He looked up and smiled. "What you laughing at?" I only grinned wider.
"You don't watch it and you'll be next," he kidded, then looked back at
the little bundle of wiggling energy laying on the dressing table.
"Isn't that right, Brandi, she doesn't watch her laughing at me and
Mommy will be next."
I suddenly realized then, he had referred to me as her Mommy, I
couldn't ever remember him doing so before! I felt my throat tighten,
joyous tears welling in my eyes.
I slowly walked into the living room and stood looking out a window. I
heard him walk up behind me. "Well she's all ready, put down for her
nap." He waited, when I didn't look back at him he slowly came around.
"What's wrong? Are you crying?"
I couldn't speak, I just laughed through my tears. He smiled and pulled
me close, holding me near. "Are you okay?" His hand pulled the stray
hairs from my face. "Was it something that I said?" Again I only
laughed, tears still streaming down my cheeks. I tried to wipe them
away but he pushed mine aside, holding my face between his large,
strong hands. "What is it? What's so funny?"
I took a deep breath and again burst into silly laughter. He frowned
and tapped his foot against the floor. I sighed, giggling and shook my
head. "I don't know why I'm laughing, I'm just so happy."
His hand had slipped to my waist, holding me tightly. "I guess I would
rather have you crying because you're happy than because you're sad."
I gave him a hug and whispered into his ear. "Thank you for what you
said in there... it means a lot to me."
He leaned away, staring blankly. "I said something, what did I say?" He
had a little boy smile crossing his face as he spoke.
"You called me Brandi's Mommy, that was something that I had hoped to
hear for quite a long time."
He used his thumb to wipe a trickling tear away.
"You deserve it, she couldn't have asked for a better mother." I looked
down at his kind words and blushed, he lifted my head back up. "I mean
that... sincerely."
My heart leapt, I felt like singing for joy. Over this past year, I
couldn't help seeing what Angel had seen in him. It was odd to me, but,
I felt I was falling in love.
******
We finished the room a day before his parents pulled into our driveway,
Ray and I met them as soon as the car pulled to a stop. Ray hugged them
both, until his father noticed me standing there.
"Hey Angel, come on over here and let me give you a big hug too!" I
walked into his great bear-like arms as he squeezed the life from me. I
felt myself being pulled from the ground, feet dangling about three
inches above the cement.
"Put her down before you crush her," his mother scolded her husband, I
mouthed her a thank-you.
"Okay now, where've you hidden her?" The big man sat me down and rubbed
his huge hands together smiling. "Where's my granddaughter?"
I turned toward Ray's mother and smiled, leaning close. "Is he safe?"
She chuckled. "I'm not sure, Brandi's all he's talked about since we
left Oregon." We giggled as he tip-toed toward the house, as if he
would wake her from way out here.
We all followed Ray into the house, quietly. At the door he gently
pushed it open and whispered. "Mom, Dad, meet your granddaughter
Brandi."
His mother whispered. "Awww... she's precious."
The big graying man smiled and patted Ray on the back. "Good thing for
you, she looks like her mother." I giggled softly.
His mom reached into a bag and pulled out a stuffed bear, laying it
beside Brandi in the crib. "I made it myself, with lots of love."
I leaned across the edge of the crib and peered down at the bear. "It's
beautiful," I whispered to Ray's mother. "You have quite a talent."
"I'm glad you think so, I have something for you too!" Her tone was
quite low and she said it with a hint of laughter in her voice.
I whispered to Ray, "We probably should help them unload the car before
Brandi wakes up." He nodded in agreement as we all quietly left the
nursery.
Back outside, we unloaded their car and moved all of the items to their
'new room'. I smiled, feeling proud at what we accomplished in such a
short time, together, as a family.
His father looked appreciatively around the room. "You did all this
yourself? Just for us?"
Ray looked at me and smiled. "I had help, otherwise it may never have
gotten done."
"We needed the extra space that this room would provide, you just
prompted us to move a bit quicker to create our guest bedroom," I
added.
His parents turned toward me,