A New Style Of Education - Part 11 free porn video

A New Style of Education by Karen Page Part 11 Jill and Anna looked rather apprehensive as we walked from the car towards the main entrance. Their hands, which they had held all the way from Milton Keynes, were still firmly conjoined. "That must have been very difficult," I said to them. "I didn't know about the rule when I joined and neither did any of the other students." "Jill couldn't have stayed at home any longer," said Anna, "and I would hate to loose Jill. I couldn't do it. I've just got to hope that the rules change so I'm able to see my family again." "I think that most students would love for the rule to change," agreed Marcus. "However, the rule is there to protect us all. If the general public knew what happened in this school, then the school might become a target, just as Jill and Julia were targets today. Oh and please remember that the year one students aren't aware of that rule, so please don't discuss it." "What happens next?" Jill asked. "Christopher will show you your rooms and explain about the school in detail. I know, Jill, that you've helped out here for several months but there are a few things that you haven't been told. I'm sure you've picked up some yourself but other things will be new." "Who's Christopher?" asked Jill. "I don't remember a Christopher." "Christopher is the male name for Helen," I explained. Then I turned to Marcus and asked, "Why is just Christopher doing it?" "You need to go and see the nurse and get your grazes checked out. They are probably nothing but Mr Hobson would be very upset if anything happened to you. He was worried enough with me going to Julia's. When he realised that you were the only one that Jill would recognise he took a lot of persuasion. The safety of his pupils is his top priority." Obviously some rumour must have circulated the school, as when we went through the front door, we saw that all the pupils were gathered. Over the next two minutes Jill and Anna must have been hugged by every student in the school. Even the shy year one students joined in. I only got one hug and that was from Christopher. He attached himself to me as soon as I got through the door and he didn't let go till Marcus coughed. "Christopher, can I ask you a favour?" Marcus asked, switching back to French. "Of course," quickly replied Christopher, ever the trusting one. "Will you look after Jill and Anna?" asked Marcus switching back to English to make sure that Christopher understood. "Jayne needs to go and see the school nurse. Show them to their room and get them into school clothes. After that it might be best to introduce them to the school network. I doubt network ID's will have been created for them yet but give that a try." "Are you hurt," Christopher asked, looking me over. "I fell into a rose bush," I said blushing. "It's just scratches." "I have to get myself checked out as well," added Marcus. "It will keep Mr Hobson from worrying too much." "It will be getting towards orchestra practice so I'll take them straight to that," decided Christopher. She gave Jayne a quick kiss on the lips and watched as Jayne disappeared after Marcus. The spontaneous gathering of students in the entrance hall quickly ended and the crowd gradually dissipated. There were no angry words from the teachers about it, they understood how important student interaction was and it was positively encouraged. Two people had just been through a harrowing experience and it was only right that they were there to show love and support. Even though Julia was the only teacher that was transsexual, many of the teachers wished that they'd been to such a supportive school. "Twice in one day," commented the school nurse when she saw me arrive. "I think this is a record." "You have such a lovely smile that I couldn't resist," I responded, trying my best to keep a straight face. After the nurse checked me over and cleaned up the grazes, she pronounced me fit. "You'll be fine. Now this evening you are supposed to be androgynous. Would you like me to remove your breast forms; save you traipsing back to your room?" "That's very kind," I said, having totally forgotten the rest of the day's activities. Soon after, I was placing the two wobbly bits of silicone into the bra cups. It seemed odd not to have them attached to me. It had only been a few hours since they were initially attached and now I felt bereft. Just as we finished up Mr Hobson appeared. "How are they?" he asked. "They're both fine. Jayne has a few minor scratches from a rosebush but that is the extent of any physical injuries. I would like both of them to have individual chats with their support person." "They are both assigned to Dr Ruiz," informed Mr Hobson without needing to check. "I'll ensure that they do that later. I've also scheduled Jill and Anna to speak to her as well but it will be later. Dr Ruiz wants them to know they have friends with the other year one students." I checked my PDA and after deciphering the French, worked out where Jill and Anna were; in the same room as last time. When I got there, I found Christopher explaining about the computer system. Jill, probably taught by her father, wasn't a computer dummy and it appeared that Anna wasn't either. They soon had a basic grasp on the system and were, with Anna translating for Jill, ordering their evening meal. "As per before, you can only wear the clothes that the school provides," I reminded them. "Why don't Christopher and I go next to our rooms, which are just opposite, while you get changed? Jill, you said you were going to take part in Mix-up Monday but with today's incident Rachel said you could be excused. Anna, since you weren't aware of it, I presume you don't have to take part." Christopher and I went to our rooms and snuggled up on the settee in my room. Christopher was pleased to hear that I wasn't going to get infections from the prickles and scooped me into his arms. I don't think I'd ever felt so loved or so wanted before and I never wanted this moment to end. I don't remember anything from that time until there was a tentative knock on the door. I quickly scrambled off Christopher's knee, while he fell into a total heap of giggles. Not a very masculine reaction. Sometimes Helen was so masculine and other times Christopher seemed feminine. I just couldn't work it out. "Coming," I called, straightening my clothes as I stumbling to the door. I opened the door to two young boys. They didn't look much different from their female personas so it was quite straight forward to work out who they were. "Come in," I said swinging the door wider. "I presume you are Bill?" "Yes, and this is Alan." I looked them over and wondered how Bill had ever survived as a boy. Even wearing boys clothes and without any padding he looked like a girl. "Christopher," I chided as I looked more closely at Alan. "Did you explain about the compression vests?" "Ah," came the slightly embarrassed reply. "I knew I forgot something." "Alan, in the bedside draw should be a compression vest. It will flatten your breasts so you look a little less feminine. It won't make you look more masculine, but just stop you looking so feminine." "Do you not need one?" I asked Bill as Alan disappeared. "Not yet," she replied. "I'm just starting to get my own, so maybe next time. I suppose it depends on how quick I grow." Alan quickly returned, looking slightly less feminine. I glanced at the clock and saw it was nearly time for orchestra practice, so we wandered down to the hall. "Do you play an instrument?" I asked as we walked into the hall. "Not really," Alan replied. "Jill has been trying to teach me how to play the oboe but I'm still not very good." "I'm sure that Mrs Russell will assign you to something appropriate," mused Christopher as we walked into the hall. Mr Hobson was chatting with Mrs Russell as we approached the stage. He positively beamed when he saw how Jill and Anna were dressed. "It's great to see you get involved so quickly. Since you haven't been given PDA's let me take your male aliases and enter them on the system. That way people don't get confused and call you the wrong name." "I'm Bill and Anna goes by Alan." "Excellent," responded Mr Hobson as he tapped away on his PDA. "Well that's done. Bill, you have an instrument already and Alan, I believe you have also been learning the oboe. I know that you've only been playing for six months, so you'll find the music difficult but see how you get on. How often did you practice?" "Daily," Alan replied. "Jill encouraged me by playing along with me. It didn't take me long to get used to playing for long periods of time." "Well you'll certainly get a lot of that here," laughed Mrs Russell handing Alan a case containing an oboe. I watched as Alan quietly followed Bill to their seats. I quickly followed, glad that my first day at school had been a bit more subdued. Heck only four hours ago poor Anna and Jill were under attack. Since then they had been rescued, said good bye to their families, come to a strange school and we're now dressed in the opposite gender than they usually dressed. For their sake, I hope they had a quieter Tuesday. The first thirty minutes of the practice was taken up with Sibelius's Karelia Suite. This was only a short piece of music and wasn't that difficult. Mrs Russell was more concerned about the feel that we portrayed rather than the actual notes. It seems we all needed to lighten our playing during the second movement. After we'd finished the Karelia Suite we took a short break. "Mozart's Sinfornia Concertante requires a much smaller orchestra," announced Mrs Russell. "Besides the four soloists it only requires strings, two oboes and two horns. I have Tim ... sorry Tina ... down for second horn and Brenda can you join Alan on oboe. Anyone not playing has a large slot of free time." The first violins and the cello's had been moved back slightly so the four soloists could sit and see each other and still see the conductor. As the break ended Bill seemed to be quite nervous about leaving Alan on his own but soon started to relax when he saw Brenda move in and, with a big friendly grin, start chatting away. The people who weren't playing didn't disappear but sat down and listened to the rehearsal; the music being more important than a computer game. Mrs Russell raised her hands and silence reigned. The strings opened and a few bars in I clearly heard Brenda and Alan. One had a slightly clearer sound. Neither was as polished or refined as Bill/Jill was but they didn't sound amateurish either. I glanced across at Bill and saw him listening intently, a small upturn in the corners of his mouth the only indication of his pleasure. After the first movement Mrs Russell stopped and stared at the four soloists. "Oh you might have got the notes correct and generally stayed in time but it sounded like four individual players. There wasn't any interplay between any of you. It isn't a competition but a team effort. Look at each other and try to feel each others needs. I'd advise you having some practice time together." She then turned her attention to the orchestra and signalled where they ought to be more subtle with their playing. It was a new experience for them all; none of them had played a concerto before. During the whole eighty minutes the reduced orchestra practiced the Sinfonia Concertante the students that weren't playing sat silently, listening and learning. As the practice ended they stood and applauded. I turned red and I noticed some others did as well. As I was putting away my instrument, Jessica, aka Richard, came across, not to see me but her sibling who was busy putting away his clarinet. "Hi William." "I'm not William," fumed Wendy. "I gave up being William and I'm never, ever going back. When I have to be male, I'm Wayne. William is dead." "I'm sorry," Jessica said, slightly taken aback. "I didn't think." Jessica turned and started to walk away, tears in her eyes. "That wasn't called for," I spat. I then turned to Christopher and sweetly asked, "Would you look after my instrument while I speak with William." I deliberately used the old male name as a show of my distain for the way he was acting. He winced at the use of the name but didn't say anything just continued to put his clarinet away. "Why should I talk to you," quietly retorted Wayne. "I can't make you. In fact I should be going to get changed but instead I'm going to sit at one of the picnic tables in the back. I'll wait ten minutes. If you appear we can chat, if not then-" I shrugged my shoulders and left the hall. I sat on the bench and waited. Just as I was getting up to go back inside Wayne appeared and sat opposite me. "Why?" I simply asked. "Why are you treating Richard like this?" "Like what?" "Oh come off it," I said, my normal good nature fading. "You aren't stupid and neither am I. Ever since Richard tried to run away you have ignored him." "I tried to save him and he went and got himself caught. It's probably too late now, I saw how happy he is dressed as a girl." "You saw how he was dressed and how he moved. Do you really think this was his first time?" "Well you are so passable that you were able to go out and you claim to never have dressed en femme before Saturday." I paused for a moment wondering how to explain things. "Richard didn't want to run away. He hasn't been a happy person at home or at school. At school he was bullied and when he wasn't being beaten up he was being threatened. The school did nothing about it and basically accused Richard of inviting the problems on himself. Your mother supported him but your father just ignored him. Your father didn't do anything to resolve the situation. The only reason Richard tried to run away was because you asked him to. Richard thinks the world of you and you just spat in his face. Today Richard was dressed as Jessica and was unsure what you would think of him. He supported you last week when you introduced Wendy to him. Did you do anything to help him? Did you show support? No, you pushed him away." Wayne lost his masculine front and appeared to look like Wendy trying to be a boy. Her face crumpled and she burst into tears. I got up and instead of comforting her I walked through the door into the school. I noticed a boy hovering and I assumed it was Yvonne still dressed as a man. "Wendy will need you," I said. "I think she has just realised how selfish she's been." As I walked towards my room, my PDA suddenly started making a wailing noise. I grabbed it and in English were the words in bright red, "SUICIDE ATTEMPT". I clicked on it and when I saw the name ran towards the student accommodation. When I got to the hallway there was already a crowd of people waiting to make sure the person was okay. "Tracy and Dr Sue are in there at the moment," sobbed Christopher. I didn't say anything due to my own tears. We just hung onto each other. I heard some commotion at the back of the crowd and saw a distraught Wendy being led off by Keith Thompson. The crowd parted for Mr Hobson to come through. He entered the bedroom and in a few moments came out. "Richard is alive," he announced gravely. "Mix-up Monday is cancelled so please go and get changed. For the next 24 hours you mustn't go anywhere without your study partner. It's been three years since we last had a suicide attempt so I will reiterate the rules before we eat. I know you are all going to be concerned so the PDA's system will show the current status." The joviality of the day's competition was replaced by a rather pensive mood. The dinning room was subdued and reflective. One of us had tried to kill themselves. The primary aim of the school was to teach the students in a safe environment and it had failed. Suicide was something that a lot of us had contemplated and a few had probably attempted before coming to the school. I looked around at the other students and saw many tear strained faces, not just in year one students but across the school; pupils and teachers alike. As Mr Hobson rose, the silence stiffened. Nobody twitched a muscle as they awaited his words. He steadied himself and looked slowly across at the students. What must have been going through his mind? "Today Richard Barnes tried to kill himself. To save the rumour mill working overtime, Richard took his bedding and tried to hang himself using it. It was only due to Sam being so observant that he failed. Richard was checked over by Dr Sue and isn't in any danger. Tracy is speaking with Richard to try and overcome the issues that made him attempt this. You might have noticed that Wendy and Yvonne are also not present. Wendy is currently very distraught about her sibling's attempted suicide. She wrongly blames herself for Richard's suicide attempt." There was a general buzz around the dining room. Many students had thought that Wendy might have been to blame with the way that she had treated her brother at the end of the rehearsal. "Yes," said Mr Hobson over the hum of chatter. "I know it sounds incredible but the way Wendy treated Richard almost stopped him committing suicide. Let's remember how stressful this school can be for some people. Finding out whom or what we are is never something to be treated lightly. I hope we all show compassion to Richard and Wendy over the coming days." Mr Hobson paused and took a sip of his water. "Till tomorrow night I don't want any student to be alone at any stage. Any sign of depression or unexpected moodiness must be immediately reported to one of the psychiatrists, your year leader or any member of staff. I'd rather get woken in the middle of the night due to a student having a nightmare than finding a student dead the next morning. After the meal I want you all to gather in your years common rooms and make sure that you talk about any issues you have. A psychiatrist per year will be on standby to help with any issues that you might have." The meal, while excellent, didn't sit easily on my stomach. There was an eerie silence as the meal progressed. Even Dan didn't seem very happy and didn't engage any of us in conversation. "It's not normally like this," reassured Dan to Anna and Jill. "At least you have the resources to cope with items like this," commented Anna. "If he'd done this at home I doubt he would have survived. Why the sudden demand on people sticking together for the next day? Isn't it like closing the stable door after the horse has bolted?" "No," replied Dan. "When there is a suicide or suicide attempt, there is a higher likelihood of someone else attempting. It gives them the extra confidence that they aren't alone. This scenario normally lasts a few hours but we don't want to take risks. After the meal can I tag along with you to your common room? I need to have a private chat with all of you." So as per the agreement Dan followed us into the common room. Paula was the first in and shrieked "Jessica!" The rest of us couldn't get in there quick enough. There wearing a skirt and halter top was Jessica with Sam, back in androgynous clothes, sitting next to her. Poor Sam quickly had to get out of the way as Jessica was smothered in hugs. "Enough, enough," said Sam pushing us away. "If you're not careful you'll smother her and we've just been through enough in saving her life." Anna and Jill stood a bit apart as we crowded around. I pulled them in as they were now part of our family. We were interrupted by Dan clearing his throat. "If I can say my bit, then I can leave you all to work things out. First thing is that tonight's curfew has been waived. If you need to stay past ten to discuss matters then so be it. Second is to do with the suicide watch you are all under. Your must stay in pairs till tomorrows evening meal; that includes tonight. I know one pair already spend every night sharing a bed and I suspect another one perhaps will. If the rest of you aren't comfortable with that we can arrange a "sleepover" in the common room. We have sleeping bags available." "Who already sleeps together?" asked Paula. "I thought we weren't allowed to do that?" "Underage sex is illegal and is actively discouraged. I don't believe either of the pairs are having sex; just sharing the same bed." "But who?" I glanced at Helen who squeezed my hand, "Helen and I have slept in the same bed but we've never had sex." "Jill and I have slept together before but we've never had sex. We slept together when we were guests last week and we will probably share the same bed. We need the comfort we both can offer each other." There was a slight discussion and everyone agreed that they would share the same bed as their study partner. "I'll leave you to discuss things," he said. "I'm your main contact till breakfast. If you need me, call me. I'd rather get called over a bad dream, than wake up to a crisis. Oh and before tomorrow morning you need to elect a year leader, the details are on your PDA's. It's all anonymous; just click on who you want. Obviously you can't vote for yourself and you can't vote for your study partner either." With that Dan left us. We pushed the settees back and made a comfort zone in the middle of the room, where we all gathered round. "Are you sure you're going to be okay," Emma asked Jessica. "Yeah, I'll be fine now," replied Jessica breaking down. "I can't believe how people actually do care. I've not felt love like this for ages. I just feel so silly now as all I needed to do was talk." Jessica, who was sat between Sam's legs, began to weep more steadily. Anna jumped up and grabbed a couple of boxes of tissues and handed them round. Sam began to gently rock Jessica in an aim to comfort her. "You don't have to tell us," I said gently. "No, I want to," she replied, trying to compose herself. "I need to, though there isn't much to say. Before I came to Hayfield Hall I had secretly dressed in women's clothes for over a year. I was never caught but always was ashamed of the desire. I tried to stop and had resisted dressing since coming to the school. I was so tempted when I saw Wendy but resisted. When I dressed earlier and nobody cared, I was in heaven. It was the best day in my life." Jessica stopped and hung her head. After a few seconds pause I asked, "What made you decide to end it?" "I couldn't stand going back to being Richard," sobbed Jessica. "I was frightened I'd never get to be Jessica ever again. I just couldn't think straight and would have preferred to die as Jessica now than Richard in the future. After chatting with Tracy I have a preliminary diagnosis of being gender dysphoric. I'm scheduled to see her at eleven every morning to discuss parts of my life. We then can decide where I go, if I want to have a sex-change or what. In the meantime I'm to live as Jessica as I seem to be happier like that. It was the image of Wendy bluntly saying that William was dead replaying in my mind that almost stopped me hanging myself. If it wasn't for that image I would probably not have hesitated and would now be dead." "So what about the field trip?" asked Emma. "That is still to be decided. If I need to be Jessica then there is a possibility that I might be allowed, as long as I'm passable. This is why Tracy wants to see a lot of me. She doesn?t want the uncertainty to hang over me." "That?s not fair," were my initial thoughts. "Why should Jessica get to change after the announcement?" I didn't want to be Jayne. I just wanted to be David." "Jayne, are you okay?" suddenly came through the fog of my own thoughts. "Huh?" I asked looking around. "Are you okay?" repeated Lewis. "You sort of drifted away and it looked like you had tears in your eyes." "I'm fine," I lied. "Liar," replied Sam. "You don't want to go on the field trip as Jayne." "No I don't," I acknowledged. "However, I am not depressed about being Jayne and as long as I'm passable I'll be able to cope. I'm pleased that Jessica has the opportunity to find what she needs to be. I'm not sure if I need to be a boy or a girl. I'm happy as a boy but I've been told I didn't act like one." "How many times did you dress as a girl before Saturday?" "Never. Saturday was the first time." "No way," said Lewis. "David was always feminine and I've known him for years," said Helen, sticking up for me. "David has never tucked before and wasn't aware of a lot of terms, so I'm afraid it's probably true," added Emma. "It took me ages to be passable. If you acted that feminine when you were at school it's a wonder you weren't beaten up." "A few years ago I used to get beaten up. I used to be friends with Helen and a few other girls and I got called names such as 'pansy' and worse. When I stopped seeing them things got slightly better, though I was always at risk for a good pasting. It was only the other week that my brother saved me from another beating. I found out the other day that Helen thought I was a transsexual and it made her fancy me even more." "So Helen, are you the boy in the relationship?" asked Lewis. "Rachel has implied that I have some masculine qualities but I don't feel like I want to be a boy. I don't feel any need to have my breasts removed or cut my hair short. I never fancied girls or boys at school. The only person that I ever fancied was David, who I thought was neither or is that both." "I'm just me," I said with a shrug. "That sounds familiar," echoed Sam, Lewis, Jessica and Emma. "While we are doing home truths," said Paula. "Jessica, do you know what sex Sam is?" "Of course, like you probably knew on the first day about Emma's history. However, I'm not saying what is on Sam's birth certificate. Sam is Sam. If Sam ever wants to explain that is up to Sam." "One day I will tell you," Sam said. "However, I'm not sure enough what I am and until I decide then I want to be neither." "Well you do it very well," complimented Anna. "I've no idea if you are a boy or a girl." "What was it like living where you did," I asked. "When we picked you up it didn't seem a very nice area." "It's a strange area of Cheltenham," Sam replied. "It is the poorest and roughest area yet it is right next to GCHQ, the top secret listening station. Also, down the road you have Pate's Grammar School, which is one of the top schools in the country. I avoided getting mugged due to always dressing so badly. I was an odd one out at school and kept myself hidden from all around. I used to spend my lunch hours either fiddling with electronics in the school labs, or practicing my violin." "I thought that was just Jill that did that," said Anna. The others just smiled probably remembering lunches hidden away from the rest of society. "So where do you fit into the puzzle of life," Sam asked Anna. "Well Jill explained the other day how I helped Bill learn how to be Jill when Bill found out about his medical issue. It took me a while to come to terms with my own preferences. I remember one awful shopping trip when I went with Jill. I was frightened of people seeing me as a lesbian. It took Jill's sister, Bethany, to remind me that I loved the person rather than the shell and if I didn't start showing my true feelings it might destroy our relationship." "Bethany?" I asked. "I thought Jill's sister was Beth, short for Elizabeth?" "Nope, Beth short for Bethany. It seems Jill had trouble when she was younger saying Bethany so shortened it to Beth and it stuck." "Since you are both now students, I take it that Adam outed you?" Brian asked Jill. "Oh yeah," she replied bitterly. "I got outed. Anna and Julia were also targeted by the mob. They vandalised the house and even tried to fire bomb it. I don't know if we would have been able to cope if Marcus and Jayne hadn't turned up." "Oh, we didn't do anything," I said. "We sneaked in via the back and comforted Jill and Anna till the crowd were moved on." Jill opened her mouth to say something, which probably would include details of the armed police so I said, "I'm just glad that Jill and Anna are safe. It was a relief when the mob was persuaded to move on without any excitement, wasn't it Jill?" I glared at Jill and Anna who seemed to finally get the message. "Oh yes, it rates as one of the worst days of my life." "Are you both okay at coming to the school?" asked Brian. "We all had a choice. While you had a choice it wasn't as big a one as we had." "Well we had very little choice, as we would have been in danger if we'd stayed in the area," replied Anna. "I suppose my parents could have moved house but that would have taken time. This solved that problem, but it is permanent; we are students now, not guests. The educational facilities in this school look excellent and we should do well. Jill and I sometimes found our previous school a bit boring due to finding the lessons quite easy." "I had the same," said Paula. "Here they push you but you don't really feel pressure. I've covered more here in a week than I would have done in over a month in my old school." "I was lucky that the school in Milton Keynes kept my birth details secret," said Jill. "Did they do the same for you Emma and Lewis?" "I didn't go to school as a boy," said Lewis rather sadly. "Outside school my parents let me live as a boy but at school I had to be a girl. I never wore a girls skirt but the trousers were girls. My hairstyle and general demeanour were masculine and there wasn't anything the school could do about it. Most people in my year knew about me and that didn't seem to be a problem. I think there is a lot less stigma in girls acting butch than boys acting feminine." "The school were very reluctant to have me at school as a girl," quietly replied Emma. "They did everything they could to make it not happen. My Mum, who was very understanding, threatened them with the Human Rights Act. I'd been diagnosed as gender dysphoric, so the school were actually hindering my medical treatment. My Dad was less happy about me needing to be a girl, he just couldn't understand it. He didn't stand in my way but it was like a huge void opened up between us. He was happy that I was still able to help with the farm and I think that was my only saving grace. The small family farm wasn't very economical so by wearing my old sister's hand-me-downs I saved my parents money." "How did the other pupils treat you?" asked Lewis. "Awfully," replied Emma, her composure breaking. Paula pulled Emma onto her lap and gently hugged her. "The school banned me from using the girl's toilet and made me use the boys. The boys didn't want me in there and-." At this point Emma spat out, "they tried to rip off my clothes." After gaining her composure she carried on, "I told the teachers who did it, but the teachers just told them not to do it again. They made no effort to punish the boys. After pressure from my Mum I was allowed to use the disabled toilet. School was hell, but I never stopped going as a girl. I might be away from my parents but at least I don't live in fear. This school has given me the opportunity to thrive." "What about you Paula and Brian," I asked. "You both have kept very quiet about today's cross-dressing. Was this your first time and what did you think about it?" "Ooh, sounds like twenty questions," laughed Paula. "Well it was the first time I've gone out of my way to look like a boy but as most girls I mostly wear trousers it wasn't that big a deal. Do I want to be a boy? No but that doesn't make me homophobic. People should be able to dress and act as they feel. I love being a girl but I think Emma is more girly than me." "How do you feel about me?" asked Emma, with a slight watery smile. Paula turned a bright shade of red. "I think you are a lovely girl," stammered Paula. "I've never been able to make a friend so quickly. I find it so easy to speak with you." "It's the same with Lewis," said Brian. "We get on so well, it's like we've known each other for years. We seem to operate on the same wavelength." "No wonder you were all so quick agreeing to sleep together," laughed Anna. "It seems like the psychiatrists set you all up." "I don?t care," said Sam with a shrug. "If I can help Jessica get through this then I will be very happy." "Amen," replied Emma. "So why did you get sent to Milton Keynes and none of us did?" Brian asked me. "Because I was the only one that Jill would recognise. She hadn't seen anyone else cross-dressed and she was upset enough without strange people entering the garden." "Sounds like it was good that you went and not me," agreed Brian. Paula stifled a yawn. "It's getting late," I said when I saw the time. "We know a lot more about each other, but is that enough? Do any of you feel anything like suicidal?" There was a lot of shaking of heads. Jessica's PDA went off and she answered it. "That was Tracy," she said putting the PDA away. "They had to sedate Wendy earlier and she is just coming round and I asked to be there when she woke up." "I'm coming with you", said Sam firmly. "Well, we can't leave our study partners," reminded Jill. "Should make showering interesting." I don't think I've seen Emma grin so widely. "Behave and don't forget to vote," was all I could say as we filed out of the common room; I needed my sleep. I just hope tomorrow was a quieter day.