Avarice
By Erin Shoemaker, Jr.
I was called to California a few months ago to take care of the
personal business of my mother. She had passed away suddenly in a car
accident, and I was named her Executor since my father had died several
years before. This was a very unpleasant duty because I was always
very close to her. Not only was she the most beautiful woman I had
ever known, but she loved me and took care of me as only a mother can.
I recall it hurt her so when I moved out on my own and took my current
lodgings in Chicago.
One afternoon soon after the funeral (I had stayed on for a few weeks
to take care of her business and close up her affairs), while going
through the basement I came across a large cardboard box stashed up
against the cement wall in a corner. I began to rummage through it.
Odds and ends were in there, some photos of what looked like tiny
torpedoes with holes in them, old clothes, bits and pieces of
newspapers, etc. Also inside, was a smaller box, tied closed with
sting. On the box was written "For Erin Shoemaker Jr.". I was shocked
that there was something with my name on it, and so I took the box and
went back upstairs to examine it. Inside the box was bottle of what
looked like brandy and an audio CD simply labeled "Charlie" Also in the
box, was a small folded piece of paper. I unfolded and read, "Erin, my
dear son. If you are reading this, it means that I am most likely
dead. This bottle contains some brandy which you dear father and I
used to enjoy. As you listen to the CD, which tells my story, please
drink some of this in remembrance of me." 'What the hell is this all
about?' I wondered. I looked at the cut glass bottle, but there was no
label on it. I opened and smelled it - smelled like good brandy to me,
so I took a long hard draught on it. It had a distinctly metallic
taste, and as I quickly put it down on the mantle, I realized that the
handwriting of the note did not appear to be my mothers. I put the CD
in the deck, and sat down on the couch to listen.
A woman's voice came on and this is what I heard on the recording:
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I have to tell you a very unusual story. In fact, you probably won't
even believe it. But it is even more unusual because it is true. The
events of which I will speak actually happened to me, are continuing to
happen at this moment, and are rapidly reaching their inevitable
conclusion. I know now that there is nothing I can do to change my
fate, but I must tell of this folly before it is too late - before that
portion of my psyche which has defined my existence since birth, ceases
to be a part of me, and is replaced by an new set of emotions which are
at once abhorrent to me, yet, by the very nature of their forced
incorporation, are beginning to feel right. I do not know how much
longer I can fight the urge to submit. This is a tale of ego, of
greed, and of the perversion of science to satisfy a personal quest for
fame and recognition. Little did I realize that by following the path
of avarice, that I would become so completely changed by the experience
that I would begin to loose myself utterly to the feelings and emotions
of a different me. I must tell of this now because very soon, probably
tonight, I will cease to exist and I will have no choice but to
surrender my soul and accept my new role. There must be a record that
I once existed.
My name is, or was, Dr. Charles Griffin. I am writing this from my
bedroom in a farmhouse just outside of town. I have been a prisoner
here of my own device for many months mow. There are no bars or chains
holding me. Only my shame prevents me for leaving. I am 34 years old,
and hold advanced degrees in biochemistry and electrical engineering,
and attended Johns Hopkins Medical School specializing in oncology. Up
to this point, my life has been pretty normal. I grew up in the
suburbs of a large American city, attended public schools, and
graduated high school near the top of my class. I have always been
interested in science, and the application of science for the
betterment of mankind. I was what you might call a 'science geek' when
growing up. I was mostly quiet and unassuming, and as a result, was
the subject of much ridicule in school. Upon obtaining my Doctorate
and M.D., I began work for a large biomedical company located in
Southern California. Here I was to obtain some modest fame by
designing two new anti-cancer drugs, primarily those which inflict the
male and female reproductive organs. Although my therapies would slow
the progress of these debilitating diseases, they did not eliminate
them. As my discoveries brought in more and more money for the
Company, and as my scientific fame grew, I began to desire the ultimate
recognition of finding a cure for cancer once and for all - the so-
called magic bullet. I became more and more convinced that I would be
the one to give mankind its much anticipated cure.
In 2004, after several years of fruitless investigations, I became
convinced that I could not ultimately succeed with drug treatments
alone. The problems lie in cellular recognition. Cancer, as you know,
hides itself within our genes, producing millions upon millions of
copies of its infected cells, until our bodies can no long tolerate
them. Normal checks and balances do not apply, because the cancer
cells are tagged with the recognition code from our own genes. In
short, our bodies do not recognize the cancer cells as anything but our
own. I reasoned that what was needed is, for lack of a better term, a
cellular policeman. This could be a drug or other delivery system
which would, first, identify cells that have had their DNA sequences
changed from the original and second, that would enter the cells and
restore the sequencing to the original, thus eliminating the cancer at
the most basic genetic level. Since one is only restoring a broken
cell, tissue should not be changed since the cells' fates have already
been decided by the biochemical environment it was first created in.
I discussed this approach with several of my colleagues, in both
industry and academic circles. All were intrigued, but most had
doubts, as I myself did. As we mulled over the prospects, it was again
pointed out that drugs are too indiscriminant. Although great strides
had been made is specificity of drug target and action, most felt that
still it was trying to hit a flea with a shotgun. Side effects, non-
target cell disruptions, and systemic metastasis all seemed to point to
the need for a highly specific delivery system.
In spite of these impediments, my mind was so stretched by the very
thought of becoming the one who finally solved the problem, and of
course the receipt of the Nobel Prize I would undoubtedly receive, that
I became completely obsessed with the research. I strained every hour
of every day trying to come up with a solution. I usually did not go
home at night, but slept on a little cot I had in the corner of my lab,
if I slept at all. I was loosing weight, becoming unkempt, and
frequently becoming angry and short with co-workers. Still, I could
not fathom anyone but me being the first to succeed.
In early 2005 (I can't remember anymore the exact date), the Head of
Medical Research, Dr. Robert Jennings, called me in his office. He
asked me to close the door, and I sat, dirty lab coat, hair disheveled,
unshaven, before him as he began:
"Charlie, I called you in today because I have received a number of
complaints about your work habits as of late. We have all seen a
change in you and are concerned about your well being. I remember when
you first started working for us; you brought to the table, not only
your superb academic and medical background, but a willingness to work
as a team member. Your early successes were the result of these
collaborative efforts, and you always seemed to remember that.
Recently however, you have become so obsessed with this cancer problem,
that I think you are beginning to burn out. Staff has reported to me
that you have become incommunicative and withdrawn, and that when you
are forced to interact, you are frequently rude and condescending,
especially to the women. Charley, you are one of my most brilliant
employees, but you must get a hold of yourself. You're a mess. What
do you have to say?"
I sat for a moment, staring at him, and feeling the anger swelling
within me. How dare he talk to me that way? If it wasn't for my
research, he would be on the production line right now. I could see
his expression change as the blood began to rush into my face. I
replied, "Look, there is some small aspect to the work I have
overlooked. I know it's there - I can feel it - and I know I am very
close to coming up with a solution. Think about it, we could be the
wealthiest men on the planet if I can only solve this one tiny riddle."
"That's all fine and well," he replied, "but you cannot solve any
problem by driving yourself into the ground. Now don't take all of
this the wrong way. I believe in you Charlie, but I also believe that
you are going to kill yourself if you don't get centered."
I sat quietly, head thundering with abstract thoughts on how I could
get back at him. It finally rushed over me like a cascade of hot
water. My head fell into my hand as I bent forward in the chair. I
had reached the breaking point, and was only just now realizing it. I
began to choke up. "Bob, you're right. I have never felt or acted
this way before. What can I do?"
"Well" he replied "there are a couple of ways we could approach this.
You could take a sabbatical, cool off, and take your mind off your work
for a while, maybe travel a bit. Another idea I have thought about, is
to get you an assistant. This could be someone to take some of the
burden off your shoulders, and give you some free time to get back in
shape. What do you think?
"I don't know. I'm so close to finding the answer, I cannot just walk
away from it now. How about the assistant route?" The idea of sharing
my research with someone else absolutely galled me. But I was not
stupid enough to not see the writing on the wall. If I did not do what
Bob was suggesting, I would be fired, and then there would then be no
backing for my research. Yes, if I wanted to become the man-god that I
wanted to be, I would have to swallow some pride, and accept his
suggestion.
"Let's see, your background is in biology, but as I recall you also
have an electrical engineering degree in there somewhere, yes?"
"That's correct."
"When I was at the NICR meetings last month, Bill Morton, you remember
Bill from Berkeley, mentioned that he has a recent Ph.D postdoc with
essentially the same background as yourself, minus the MD of course. I
hope you don't think me presumptuous, but I contacted them and inquired
if they would be interested in working with you. It seems your
reputation proceeded you, and they were more that willing to dispense
with the postdoc and come over to work with us. If you agree, I will
set up a meeting with them for next week, and we will go from there.
Sound reasonable?
"Look Bob," I said tersely, "I know what's happening here. I can see
that in your eyes I need an assistant. But, if I go ahead with this,
it must be clearly understood that I am in charge of the project, and
any credit for discoveries made should be made to me."
Dr. Jennings' eyes widened as he stared back at me, "Charlie, you see,
that's the very attitude which continues to get you into trouble. We
will work on that, but OK, that's the understanding."
* * * * * *
Over the next week, I continued to think about what Jennings had
suggested. Still I could not escape the thought that someone else
would get credit for my work. But each time I did, it was quickly put
back in its place by the remembrance that I needed the resources of the
Company to succeed.
On Wednesday, Bob called me and asked me to meet him in the conference
room at 11:00. He also mentioned, not too delicately, that he wanted
me to be on my best behavior.
I entered the conference room to find it empty, and so took a seat at
the side of the long table there. I did not have long to wait. I
could hear Bob's voice, and another male voice coming down the hall.
As then entered the room, I recognized Bill Morton, and re-introduced
myself (I had not seen him for several years). As we took seats, I was
wondering what was going on - where was the postdoc? I condescendingly
inquired, "So, where is the hot shot postdoc that's supposed to help me
with my work?"
Bob stared back and replied, "Now Charlie, remember what I said. She
will be here in a second. She needed to use the facilities. There was
a slight chuckle from Morton. We sat, awaiting the entrance of my
would-be savior.
As the sound of footsteps became louder in the hall outside, we turned
toward the door. In walked the most gorgeous young woman I had ever
seen. She was slightly short, probably about 5'4," with long flowing
black hair and bangs covering her forehead. Her large eyes shown a
beautiful shade of green, and her small mouth and lips were outlined
with frosted pink lipstick. Her eyebrows were thick, but angled just
right so as to be forcefully feminine. She reminded me of an anime
girl. She was wearing a tight, deep blue, sleeveless blouse which
covered her upper chest as it approached and encircled her thin neck.
Her breasts we ample, but not overly large, and her sheer bra could be
seen underneath the blouse creating a smooth outline to her fantastic
figure. Her waist was thin, which widened out to rounded hips. Below
was a black miniskirt, held in place by a large black belt with brass
buckle. Her legs were incredibly shapely and fit, and were sheathed in
black panty hose. She wore black shoes with a slightly spiked heel.
I was awestruck. I almost fell to the floor rather than standing when
she entered. Before Bob could say anything, I reached out my hand to
her and said, "Hi, I'm Dr. Charlie Griffin, welcome to the Company."
She quickly grabbed my hand and said smiling in a soft voice, "Hello,
I'm Dr. Marsha Hammond - a great please to finally meet you. I have
read many of your papers, and found you work fascinating." As I took
her hand, I noticed her lovely thin fingers and relatively short but
manicured pink nails. Her skin felt soft and warm as I released her
hand slowly. As she sat, she reached under herself to insure her skirt
didn't ride up. I quickly ran my fingers through my messed hair to
attempt to comb it. "Good," Dr Jennings began. "We are here to
entertain the idea of Dr. Hammond coming to work for us and the
Company."
What followed was about 30 minutes of questions and answers centered on
Dr, Hammond's credentials, and her willingness to work long hours under
unusual stress. Every answer she gave was perfect. I have to confess,
that I could not concentrate very well on her answers because I was
mentally undressing her. That is, until the subject came around to
academic credit. She made the statement that she would love to work
for us, but that she expected to get her fair share of credit for any
discoveries or devices that came out of the research. Suddenly, I was
back in the room. Blood flushed into my face as I worked hard to
contain my sudden shock back to reality. "Dr Hammond," I said in a
forceful voice, "It must be understood that this is my lab, and that
any credit to be given will be determined by me." She looked at me
with a sudden glare and fire in her green eyes that just as quickly
retreated into a submissive smile. "I understand that Doctor," she
said calmly, "I just want to make sure that if I work on some aspect of
the project that you don't, the fair credit is received."
At this point Dr. Jennings broke into the conversation. "Charlie, I
hope you will remember that any discoveries you make while an employee
of the Company, belong to the Company, and not you personally.
Certainly credit for the discovery can be given where credit is due,
but the underlying fact is that you work for us, not the other way
around. Dr. Hammond - this is a standard clause of all our
professional contracts. Is this acceptable?
The stunning scientist looked down toward her feet for a second and
then looked directly at me. "This is Ok with me if it's OK with Dr.
Griffin". Still infuriated, I abruptly said, "OK".
"Good," said a beaming Jennings, as he shook the hand of Dr. Miller who
was also grinning ear to ear. Marsha Hammond reached-out and took my
hand, and held it surprisingly tight. "I look forward to working with
you Doctor. I know we will make an unbeatable team." She smiled,
showing her beautiful white teeth and lovely mouth. I was struck down
again - "Ah-h-h yes," I said hesitatingly, " We'll begin work on Monday
next week." Again she slowly slid her hand from mine, and turned to
leave the room.
Back at the lab, I felt the sudden urge to clean the place up a bit.
* * * * * *
During he next couple of weeks, I began to become used to the having
someone else running around in my lab. Marsha and I began to become
comfortable in working with each other, and I began to appreciate
having an extra pair of hands around. I quickly was able to determine
her strengths and weaknesses with regard to assisting with my research,
and purposely gave her a very large amount of reading to get up to
speed on it. She handled this with enthusiasm and cheerfulness, in
spite of it begin enough to overwhelm even the most aggressive medical
student. As I said, I slowly became comfortable working with her, but
always, in the back of my mind, was the paranoid notion that, first,
this was my project, and second, that she was a beautiful woman.
Nevertheless, I found myself having more spare time to take coffee
breaks, go for walks, or get some fresh air.
As time progressed, our scientific conversations began to focus more
and more on the idea of what we called 'specific delivery' - the idea
of targeting only cancer cells and delivering the cure only there. We
racked our brains, spent hours together pouring through the literature,
bouncing ideas off one another, failed experiments, and so forth. But
nothing seemed to gel. Finally, as we were sitting having a coffee in
the Company cafeteria, we both overheard a conversation from the next
table where they were discussing nano-technology. Nano-technology is,
for lack of a better description, the shrinking down of technology to
accomplish various tasks. Suddenly, we both realized what had
happened.
We began a series of inquires as to the state of nano-technology. We
discussed ideas with experts in the field, found the latest progress
reports, and generally went back to engineering school to refresh our
minds about these little machines. We slowly began to piece together a
game plan we thought would have promise. The basic idea was that we
could create nanobots, or molecular-sized machines, which we could
program with genetic information from an individual's normal, healthy
genetic information. Once programmed, we would release these cellular
policemen into the system of the patient. There the nanobots would
hunt down any cells that did not have the specific, pre-programmed
coding sequences. Once discovered, these cells would then be invaded
by the nanobots, and the sequences repaired to prevent the spread of
the cancer.
This was our working plan. Unfortunately, the technology was lacking.
We traveled to scores universities and biotech firms, both in and out
of the U.S. Each time we were confronted by the same answer - sorry we
just can't do that yet. Months and months had gone by, and we were
both becoming highly agitated at the lack of being able to carry out
our plans.
By the end of the year, we were becoming convinced that we may be
barking up the wrong tree. I began to have my doubts about the
nanobots, and it began to show. I was once again becoming despondent,
angry and rude, especially to Marsha. I began to call her stupid, and
became overly-critical of anything she would suggest. She seemed to be
taking it all in stride, even during my most outrageous diatribes, but
I was slowly becoming convinced that it was her that was holding me
back, and I showed it. Nevertheless she persisted.
* * * * * *
It was sometime that late the following spring when Marsha called me a
home late on a Friday night, and told me she had something important to
show me, and it could not wait. Thinking this was just another lost
effort, I protested. She responded by saying that she needed me to
come to her house immediately to see what could be the answer to our
'specific delivery' quandary. I immediately got dressed and drove the
six miles to her house. Was she doing research at her house without
letting me know? I began to become even more angry and I began to
think of all kinds of conspiracies.
Her house was an older farmhouse, situated between two large hills just
outside of town. She had moved in there soon after coming to the
Company because she wanted quiet and privacy. A little odd I thought
at the time, but hey, whatever floats your boat. I had been there only
once before - soon after she had moved in when she was having a house-
warming party. As I pulled off the highway onto the dirt road leading
down to the house, I noticed how dark the place seemed. No cheery
lights in the windows, only a dull yellow glow from one of the
downstairs windows.
I parked the car in front of the large covered porch, and approached
the door. As I was about to knock, the door swung open and there was
Marsha standing in her lab coat, her hair pulled back into a large
pony-tail. She motioned me in, and we sat down in the living room
which was to the right of the entrance hall.
She began, "Ya know Charlie, I think I have discovered the answer to
our prayers." As she spoke, she nervously wrenched her hands together.
"I wanted to tell you this before anyone else, so that we are clear
about what I have accomplished, but I think I have our answer."
I looked quizzically at her, and said angrily, "What do you mean?
Don't tell me this is another one of your stupid attempts to merge the
coding sequences to a retrovirus? I told you before, that is not
specific enough to allow the targeting of only the cancer cells."
She stopped her movement immediately, and glared back at me with fire
in her eyes. "No: she said in a definitive tone, "This is more in line
with what we have thought of all along. As you know, we have been
unable to find a source for the actual construction of the nanobots.
So, not having a readily available source, I decided to try to make
them myself. I have managed, over the past few months, to, I believe,
successfully create our little policemen here in my own lab."
I was dumbstruck! This was my idea! How could this woman do what no
other engineering firm could do, and do it in such a short time and in
her own lab at home? I dismissed it from my mind as folly. "Oh yeah -
Sure," I said. "What makes you think you can do what no one else has
been able to? You're just a bimbo who enjoys the attention of other
scientists by soliciting your supposed brain power in an attractive
package." And then I snapped. All of the pent-up anxiety and
disappointments of the past year suddenly came to the surface, and I
could contain myself no longer. "Listen cunt, I am sick and tired of
you trying to ride on my coattails!" I screamed at her. "You probably
got this job because you gave Jennings a blow job! You make me sick,
and I am not going to sit here and listen to your pseudo-scientific
babble about how you have solved one of the most difficult engineering
tasks of history. I have had enough of you and your mini-skirt ways.
I am going home now, and I expect that when I show-up to work on Monday
morning, that you will have packed up your things and left MY lab."
I was incensed, but I remember beginning to stand up to walk out when
Marsha buried her head in her hands and began to whimper, "You're right
Charlie. What was I thinking? Of course my ideas won't work, but I
wanted you to see for yourself how far I've gotten." As she began to
cry, I could feel my anger subsiding. "I only wanted your approval
because your opinion means so much to me." I stood there watching for
a few moments while she composed herself, but the sight of this
beautiful creature sobbing was enough to melt me like butter. "Of
course, if you no longer want to work together, I will honor your
request. But please, do me the favor of at least taking a look at what
I have."
By this time, I my calm had returned, and I actually felt a little
sorry for her. "Well OK, but please, if this is going to be a sham,
let's just call it a night and be done with it."
"Oh I think you will be surprised" she said. But I was taken aback by
her sudden change of demeanor and the sly, deeply penetrating look she
fired back at me. "Let's step out to the lab and I'll show you".
* * * * * *
We returned to the entrance room and followed the passage that was next
to the stairs back to the kitchen of the house. The farmhouse kitchen
had a large island in its center, and a screened-in back porch. As we
started out through the porch, she stopped and said, "Look, how about a
drink? I could really use one after that thumping you just gave me.
Just as kind of a last hurrah?" By this time, it was already
approaching midnight, and to be honest, I remember that I was already
tired, and thought that a drink would probably make the drive home a
bit dangerous. But I acquiesced. She reached up toward a cabinet that
was above the refrigerator, but she was too short to reach the door. I
remember her turning slowly and effortlessly around toward me, and
said, "Gee, the poor little woman can't reach the cabinet. Could you
please help me?" 'Smart ass' I said under my breath, but I walked over
and quickly opened the cabinet. Inside was a bottle of wine. I took
the bottle down from the cabinet, and turned to see that she had
already pulled two wine glasses from a cabinet at the other side of the
room. We met at the island, and I opened and poured a little of the
amber red into each glass. We stood for a moment, each holding a
glass, and she finally said, "Here's to past collaborations, and future
endeavors". I remember lifting the glass to my mouth and taking a long
hard drink, but Marsha fumbled her snifter and spilled hers on the
floor. "Shit," she said. "Oh well, I'll get some more when we come
back." She looked up, "I know this is uncomfortable for us both, and
so I'll get you on you way quickly. So please, follow me." I did,
bringing the glass with me.
I recall going down the steps of the back porch, and crossing the grass
covered yard to the barn beyond. As I entered the barn, I was struck
by what I saw. There were two a large shipping containers sitting in
the middle of the barn. They were side by side, and adjoined each
other. "Welcome to my world" she said as we entered the closest one
via a door cut in its side. Inside was a modern, complete, sanitized,
well-lit laboratory. In the center was a large operating table with
restraints dangling from both sides, and a large surgical lamp above.
The table at one end had been fitted with OB/GYN stirrups. On the far
side of the room, I could see a glass enclosed space with about a dozen
cages in it. There appeared to be chimpanzees in a couple of the
cages. "My God!" I said. "Do you have any idea of how much trouble
you would get into if they knew you were using primate research models
without permits? This is highly illegal."
"Yeah, but no one will find out about this anyway, so not too worry.
Besides, when you consider what I have accomplished, I think I will
most likely be rewarded rather than prosecuted."
"There you go again. Ok you got me here, now hurry up and show me what
you got."
"Over here," she said, as she motioned to a computer screen. She sat
down and began to enter keystrokes. The screen zoomed into an image of
a small cylindrical device, which had several holes in one end, and a
small slit in the other. It appeared to be made of stainless steel,
and shone with a metallic look to it.
"What is it?" I asked her.
"This, my fine scientist, is a nanobot. What you are looking at is
approximately four angstroms in length, is powered by a miniature heat
pump engine, and contains a microchip to allow programming of DNA
sequences. Believe it or not, there is enough memory in this little
gem to store a complete DNA sequence profile. They are created by the
machine over there," and she pointed to another console across the
room. "I just place a healthy sample from the patient into its feeder
syringe, and the machine will make millions of these little guys in a
couple of hours."
I reacted violently, 'But this is incredible! How did you manage this?
I can't believe that you could..." Then I realized that I was
beginning to sweat as I dropped the glass of wine on the floor. I
turned to look at her, only to find her with a large grin on her face.
She began to laugh out loud. "Yes, how could a sweet helpless little
girl like me ever do such a thing, right?" Listen you pompous ass.
You have done nothing but harangue me since I came onto this project.
You and your sick paranoia about fame and glory". I could see the
flame in her eyes as she spoke. "Well I did it myself, and guess what
Dr. Charles Griffin, you won't get ANY of the credit."
By now I was sweating profusely, and my mind was getting dizzy. "You
bitch!" I screamed. "You will never take credit for my work! I'll
see to that as soon as I...." but again the world became hazy. I
recall falling forward toward the operating table, and grasping my
stomach in pain.
"Oh I don't think so," she said. "You see, my experiments have already
been completed. The nanos can not only fix a cell's broken sequences,
but they also can replace or remove any DNA sequence I desire. And ya
know what, big shot? I think it's time to take you down a peg. Soon
you will not only have to live with the stigma I have had to, but your
very essence will soon become lost in new waves of emotions and
behaviors which are completely foreign to you now. And there is
nothing you can do about it. Nothing! So go to sleep my dear mentor,
and we'll get started right away."
At this point, I remember only that I could not effectively move. She
approached my contorted body, and with a mighty shove, placed me upon
the operating table. "What are you doing to me? I asked her in my now
slurred voice. "Never you mind, Sweetheart," she said in a matter-of-
fact tone. I recall seeing her moving around the table, placing my
arms and legs in the restraints. I had become her prisoner.
She began to cut away my shirt with a pair of medical scissors. "No!
Stop!" I cried, but she only laughed. My mind was going fast, like a
locomotive headed toward a dark tunnel. The last thing I remember was
her approaching with a large syringe, and saying, "OK Sweetie, let's
give mama some of your DNA to work with." As I watched the syringe
being lowered into my abdomen, the train reached the tunnel and all
went black.
* * * * * *
How long I was out is uncertain. I awoke exactly as I had been when I
had succumbed to her drug. My mind was foggy, and I felt as if I was
going to be sick. My mouth was completely dry. I lay there for what
seemed like an eternity, when I heard the door open and close. Every
time I tried to lift my head, I almost blacked out, so I did not even
try to see who it was. I could hear footsteps, and in a second, there
was Marsha leaning over me, he long black hair hanging down around her
shoulders. She was dressed in a t-shirt. She examined the point of
entry from the syringe and said, "Good, looks like no infections for
you."
"So Dr. Griffin," she said in disgust. "Here we are at last. Our
journey together is about to take on a whole new phase. It should be
only a few more minutes before we have your DNA coding figured out, and
then the real fun begins."
"Water!" I said in a hoarse voice.
"Oh of course, you must have cottonmouth from the anesthetic. I'm
sorry, here you go." She leaned over me to retrieve a cup. As she
did, her breasts rested upon my chest. I instinctively reacted, at
which she up-righted herself and said, "Enjoy that while you can,
because soon that will be a thing of the past, or should I say, a thing
of YOUR past." She bent the flexistraw into my mouth and I sucked in
the cold water. It crashed through my mouth like a flood of relief.
"What are you going to do to me?" I croaked out.
"Well I don't want to spoil the surprise, but I suppose I'll let you
know in advance since I want to see your reaction." She paused and
stood upright glaring at me. "Listen you cocksucker - oh that's funny
- you have spent your entire professional life thinking you were the
smartest thing around, and because you are a man, you could bully your
way with any girl you had to work with." A sudden alarm went off
somewhere in the room, but I could not tell where it came from.
"It's soup!" she exclaimed. "That will be your sequencing," and turned
back to me. "It's time to think a bit more about your fate. As I was
saying, it's assholes like you that have made science so difficult for
women like me. You have fucked us up so much so that today only the
most aggressive and man-like women can make it in your science world.
Your greed and ego and desire for fame have led you to sell your soul
to the devil, so to speak." She stopped for a second, and raised her
finger to her mouth as if pausing to think carefully about her next
words.
"So soon, you will see what it is like to be a second class citizen, at
least from your point of view. For you see, Sweetheart, I have decided
to remake you into the one thing you yourself have pooh-poohed all
these years - the one thing you fear the most - a subservient, sweet,
obeying young woman whose life will be spent in the pursuit of pleasing
her man. And there is nothing, absolutely nothing, you can do about
it. By the time I finish with you, the only thing you will be able to
think of is having a large throbbing penis slipped into your sweet, wet
vagina; of sucking cock until it erupts in your mouth; of doing
whatever is asked of you to make sure your man is kept happy. You will
be a fully functioning female, and you will eventually be transformed
so completely, that your will forget about who you were, and only focus
on your burning desires. You will continue to have your memories right
up until the very end. Only at the last excruciating moment when you
mind completely submits to your new emotions and desires, when you
consciously surrender to your burning desire to be completely female,
will you be free of the utter humiliation you are going to feel. At
that point you will cease to exist, Dr. Charles Griffin. And you
won't be able to stop it. Your desires will be so strong that even
though you want to stop, you will be powerless. Your mind will scream
to stop, but your new body will not want to. You will eventually have
to give in - It is inevitable"
"And oh yes, and by the way, this comes with all the baggage too.
Periods, cramps, mood swings, and the risk of pregnancy all are part of
the deal, but it won't matter to you because all you will think about
is pleasuring him."
Now here's the best part - because the nanos are body heat powered and
not dependent upon an outside energy source, they will continue to
repair any cellular damage, and replacing bad sequences with the
programmed sequences I am going to give you. That means, you will
never grow old, and you will never loose your desires to pleasure and
serve men. You will be a sex slave forever. How's that for a mind
fuck baby? I hope you choke on it - no, on second thought, I hope you
choke on dick," she laughed.
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Surely this would not be
possible. I struggled against the restraints, kicking wildly and
trying to break out of the bonds. " No - No - you can't do this!" I
screamed. It was to no avail. I soon wore myself out and I stopped
struggling. "Good," she said. "You are already beginning to become
submissive. Just wait until I finish with you. Look, like I said, this
is going to happen to you no matter what, so you might as well accept
it. Fighting the change will only prolong your physical and mental
anguish."
She turned to the bench and began to put on some surgical gloves, "Now
unfortunately, I need to take care of some business. I need to erase
any trace of your visit here tonight - your car, etc. - and make it
look like you have decided to chuck it all and disappear. I need to
you to do something for me. I want you to write a little note telling
the world that you have decided to leave science and go away. Can you
do this for me?"
"Fuck off," I yelled at her.
"Listen Sweetie, you better do this, or, ya know what (?), I'll give
you the DNA of one of those chimps over there, and you could wind up
being the subject of experiments yourself. Would you like that better?
Or perhaps, I'll give you the balls of an elephant." she laughed.
"Now here, take this pen and write what I tell you," she commanded.
Again I yelled, "Fuck you!"
"No No No," she said. "It will be you getting fucked this time. I
could just as easily kill you right now and make it look like a suicide
- now write!" she commanded.
She took a pen, put it in my tethered right hand, and slipped a piece
of paper under it. "Write this...." she said. "I can't - - take it
anymore - - period. I - - have decided to - - stop working in science
- - and go away - - to someplace - - where life is simpler -- period.
I instruct - - all my possessions - - be given to my brother - - David
Griffin - - of Pasadena - - period. Don't - - try to find me - -
period. Fuck you all. - exclamation point. Now sign it" I hesitated.
She picked up a large syringe and said, "I'm not sure what's in this
one, shall we find out?" and moved it toward my arm. I signed the
paper.
As she took the paper, she said, "Excellent. I am sure there will be
questions raised, but gee, I'm just a poor defenseless girl, and when I
tell them you promised to marry me, well, who do you think they will
feel sorry for, hum?"
She walked away from me toward the back wall, and returned a moment
later with a loaded hypodermic. "Nighty night Sweetie - I'll see you
when I get back. By the way, do you have any preference for a name,
you cup size, hair color, body type, etc.? Would you like to be
oriental? That might be fun. Be thinking about it and when I get
back, we can discuss it a little more." She giggled hysterically as
she injected me with the solution - I immediately felt the buzz of the
anesthetic as my mouth went dry and my world shrank to nothingness.
* * * * * *
I again awoke on the table, but this time, I was completely naked, and
my legs had been opened wide. Straps were around my ankles and wrists,
and a large strap was across my lower rib cage. There was a terrible
smell in the room. I heard noise coming from behind me, but could not
turn my head enough to see - every time I did, I went dizzy.
Eventually Marsha came around in front of me and gave me a little drink
of water. "Feeling better?," she asked. "Oh oh," she said, "I see you
made a mess," as she looked toward my rear end. "But that's good. We
want to be sure your system is cleared of any solids before we begin
your change." She produced some toilet paper, and began to wipe my
bottom. She then bent down and brought up a large yellow bucket, and
threw the soiled paper in it. She walked across the room, opened the
door, and set the bucket outside. "That's better" she said. After a
few tries, my voice was strong enough to talk.
"Marsha, please don't do this. I will give you full credit for the
discovery and will quit the Company. Just please don't do this," I
begged.
"Nice - begging.... Soon you will be begging for something else. No
I'm afraid it's too late. Look, you made your bed, and now you will
have to sleep in it - so to speak." She paused. "I have a few
suggestions about the new you. I thought about 5'2" would be nice -
that was we can ensure you will not be too strong to resist your fella.
I was in doubt about the hair color though - what would you prefer?
Blonde, brunette, redhead or black?" I sat in silence. "Well OK then,
we'll make you a blond. Pubic hair too I think" As she spoke, she made
little notes on a Post-It paper. Now, since you will be a willing
partner, and will want to keep you man around, - God I love saying
that - let's give you some nice knockers. Say a 36-C should do it,
especially with your smaller frame. I have already selected a few
other attributes for you such as general body shape and coccyx angle,
pelvic width, slim waist, percent body fat, and so forth. So bear with
me now, and I will get the nanos started.
I could see her cross the room, sit in front of the nanobot machine,
and begin entering data. I again tried kicking and pulling at the arm
restraints, but it was no good. Exhausted again, I stopped struggling.
She looked up, smiled, and said, "See you are mine now, and nothing can
save you. There you go," she said to herself as she stopped typing -
"...all programmed. Baby, you are gonna be so hot, I think I will be
envious. Your mind and body will be designed for one thing - sex."
She crossed back over to me, and examined me closely. She stopped at
my penis, and began to play with it with her long fingers. "Ya know, I
always wondered how endowed you were." In spite of my situation, it
began to respond in its familiar fashion. "My my," she said "perhaps I
should give you one last organism as a man, just so you will remember,
at least for a while, what that burst of body rapture felt like." She
began to stroke my penis softly and it soon became rock hard. "Now,
this is what you will soon enjoy most of all..." She bent forward and
caressed it with her rounded lips. Tongue flicking and swirling around
my member which was now fully inserted into her mouth. She began
pumping up and down on it, until I began to feel my internal muscles
start the familiar pulsating. Suddenly she stopped, stood erect, wiped
her mouth and said, "Sorry Charlie" I'll leave this for you to dream
about while I'm gone," and laughed hysterically.
Adjusting her clothes, she said, "OK Doc, it's time for me to go to
work. I'm so sorry you decided to disappear the way you did. Poor Dr,
Jennings is in a mess with Administration now, and has offered me your
job. After some soul searching and appropriate protestations, I
accepted it. By the bye, the Police showed up at the lab yesterday
asking questions about you. You should have seen my performance.
Oscar worthy! I began by pleading ignorance, and then broke down into
tears as I told them that you had asked me to marry you. How could you
have done this to me? The Policeman was so nice, putting his arm
around me and consoling me. I pleaded for them to find you but he said
there was no trace of your whereabouts. It seems that the cops have
written off Dr. Griffin."
"I am sorry for having to keep you under sedation, but of course, I
cannot risk your escaping yet. Soon you will not want to anyway, but
for now...." I felt the now familiar pinch of a needle enter my arm,
and she threw a blanket over my naked body. I once again began to fade
out into darkness.
* * * * * *
The now familiar haze was beginning to lift. My head felt like was
full of cotton on fire. As the spinning world began to slow down, I
thought I was alone in the lab. I was still naked, but my feet had
been clamped into the OB/GYN stirrups at the end of the table, and my
groin area was spread eagle to the world. I could see a catheter tube
running from the end of my penis. Again and again I struggled against
the bonds that held me. But they were too strong, and each time I
tried harder, I made myself dizzier. I finally gave up.
Soon Marsha walked in and said, "Well tonight is the big night. I can
see that the nanos are ready, and I assume you are too. You know, I
really think you're going to enjoy your new life. What a deal when you
think about it. No responsibilities, nothing to worry about except
keeping your man happy and your girlish figure in trim shape.
Sometimes I envy women that are satisfied with this kind of shallow
existence, but I couldn't live without more challenging endeavors. Oh
well, this won't be your problem, that's for sure."
"Now I'm not exactly sure how this is going to feel for you. In my
chimp experiments, they seemed to go into a lethargic period of about
two days. The changes happen slowly as the cells of your body are
reformed according to their new codes. I suspect that the bone
transformations may be a bit painful. But not to worry, it's the
weekend now, and I will be with you the whole time. Here, let me take
care of this.... " She wheeled over a hanging bottle of solution and
inserted the needle into my wrist. "Try not to disturb this if you
can. This will be your nourishment for the next couple of days." She
removed the needle as she slipped the butterfly in a bit further in,
and taped it tightly against my wrist.
"Just one more item and we'll be ready to go," she said. She produced
a razor and some soap, and lathered up the area around my penis. "I
think this will be better observed without any confusing hair around."
She began shaving off my pubic hair. "There we go. That's better," she
said as she washed me down and dried me off. I could see my penis
below me and the clean shaven area above it. Next she came around to my
head, and with a pair of electric sheers, shaved my head clear of all
hair. She then crossed the room and brought back a large 20cc syringe.
She produced a piece of surgical tubing, and tied off my left arm above
the elbow. Examining the inside of my elbow, she thwacked the vein a
couple of times and said, "Well, Dr. Griffin, this is it, "with a large
grin on her face. I began to struggle one more time against my
restraints. "No! God please don't do this! I'll give you anything!
Don't! Don't!" But it was too late. I saw her fingers depressing the
plunger of the syringe. I stopped struggling, closed my eyes, and
suddenly realized that I was going to die. "There ya go," she said as
she removed the syringe and dabbed the entrance wound with a cotton
swab.
She released the constrictor band on my arm, and I in a few seconds I
felt a flutter in my heart and a slight pain in my stomach as heaviness
invaded my head. I swooned, looking up at Marsha going in and out of
clarity. I finally blacked out completely.
* * * * * *
I don't remember much about the next few days. I can recall myself
going in and out of consciousness. Each time I moved back into the
real world, there was Marsha's face smiling down on me.
At one point I was awakened by Marsha slapping me lightly back and
forth on the face. I had no concept of time, so I did not know how
long I had been out. "Wake up Sweetie," I recall her saying. "I
though you might want to say goodbye to Captain Winkie" and she
gestured toward my feet. She lifted my head and I was shocked to see
that my breasts had grown dramatically, and the nipples had become
larger and surrounded by large pink areolas. I tried to move my hands
up to touch them, but I was still restrained. I remember feeling an
intense agony that I couldn't touch them. My stomach had become a
broad flat plain, accentuated only by my navel and crests of my two
ileum bones protruding slightly under the skin. My hips had widened,
while above them my waist had restricted. I could just make out my
ribs above that. My hips blended smoothly into my stirruped legs and
were completely smooth. My feet, visible up in the stirrups, had
become small and dainty looking. In between my legs I could see my
still cathetered penis. As I looked, a terrible pain began to build
deep within my abdomen, and I simply gave-up, turned my head, and gave
in to the anesthetic again.
Again I was awakened by Marsha slapping me in the face. She excitedly
said, "Here I wouldn't want you to miss this," and through the drug-
induced haze, I could see her move a large overhead mirror into place
in front of me. "See OK can you?" she asked.
"You bitch," I tried to say but I couldn't get the words out. Then
suddenly I felt a tugging at my penis. As I watched, its base began
slip further between my legs. 'Oh my God' I thought to myself, 'This
is really happening'. With a sudden shake, I could feel my penis slip
down further under my body, and begin to shrink. At the same time my
scrotum flattened against the base of my abdomen, immediately in front
of my rectum. I felt like someone had kicked me in the balls, and I
squirmed in pain as I felt them pull back into my body cavity. There
was a distinct popping sensation as they broke through the abdomen wall
into the interior cavity. As I looked, where the testicles had been
absorbed the remaining skin began to move slowly, pulsating back and
forth. As it did, it began to develop into the shape of a large eye,
with distinct lids on either side. My penis became smaller and
smaller, while above it, the space it had occupied was slowly
bifurcating into two halves. Then I felt an intense burning sensation
at the place where the penis was retreating, but it continued to shrink
and eventually took up residence at the head of the eye just inside the
front of the eye.
"I think we can dispense with this now," Marsha said as she slowly
pulled the catheter from my new orifice. I could feel every centimeter
of the retraction. The deep abdominal pain that I experienced before
came back with a vengeance. It became too great, and I blacked out
again.
I came to again, but this time I was alone, or at least I thought I
was. I sensed that the abdominal pain was still there, but it has
subsided some from its previous intensity. As I shook off the haze, I
looked down to see my breasts had grown in size, and had taken on a
lovely shape. Lovely? How could I think this way? The nipples were
firm as I again felt the uncontrollable desire to rub them. Still I
was restrained and my physiological agony returned. As I continued to
look down I saw that my body had continued its feminization, and now
looked wonderful. 'Wonderful' - what was I saying? How could this be
wonderful? And I shut my eyes in disgust. Yet in spite of the continued
pain, and in spite of the revulsion I felt, there was something else
which gave me pause to look at myself again and again. 'NO!' I would
say to myself and close my eyes, only to open them again in a few
seconds for another look and feeling of amazement. Then I looked into
the mirror. What I saw shocked me beyond any attempt to describe it.
There, between my legs was beautiful female genitalia. But the second
I recognized the image before me, the pain shot through my body again.
Intense pressure - intense pain as it felt like I was going to split
open and my organs burst from within me. I winced in pain, screamed
aloud, and watched as a burst of blood shot from the eye between my
legs. I moaned in pain and went unconscious.
I awoke in fog. I could see the shape of someone below me, moving back
and forth. As my vision cleared I could see Marsha darting around.
She approached and said, "Hi. Glad you're up, Sweetie. Well we're
just about done here. That was a little messy wasn't it? I think
another day or so, and the change will be complete. Now, take a look
at this," and she gestured toward my feet. I looked into the mirror
and beheld my newly formed vaginal opening. I couldn't believe it.
How could this be? I was still me, but look at my body! Oh God! I
cried to myself, as I realized that this was the way I would be
forever. I had an overwhelming rush of emotion, and began to sob.
"Now, now," said Marsha. "You should be happy I gave you this gift. A
sweet little pussy for your man to love every night. Think how happy
you will be. Think how happy it will make him. Besides, you better
get use to crying - it's all part of the package." As she spoke, my
mind raced and spun. I was completely without coherent thought and a
million different things crossed through my brain at once.
* * * * * *
I awoke still on the table. My feet were no longer elevated, but were
restrained as before. Most of my pain had subsided, but I felt weak
beyond belief. I tried to shake my head into consciousness, but it
seemed only to confuse me more. I was covered by a loose bedsheet, and
could not see myself except to the two large lumps of my new breasts
under the sheet. The overhead mirror was been retracted up toward the
ceiling.
I lay for some time, thinking about what had happened to me. How was I
going to live? What will become of me now? They would believe me if I
went to the police and told them what happened. They would lock me up
in an asylum. I began to whimper again and suddenly realized that the
sound coming from my throat was not what I was used to. "What the
hell?," I screamed out, only to realize that the voice that came out of
my mouth was not my own. It was a distinctly feminine voice. 'Oh my
God' I said to myself. Even my voice has changed. Then I realized
there truly was no hope for me. That she had won, and I had become the
very thing I had ridiculed and tried to control most of my adult life.
I began to cry uncontrollably.
Eventually Marsha returned. "Hello lover," she said. "How are you
feeling tonight? I am beat - a long day at the office you know." She
laughed out loud. "Well let's see how you are doing then." She
grabbed the sheet and threw it off toward my head. It didn't quite
clear my face. "Oops," she said, "let me get that." And she threw it
the rest of the way off. "My my!" she gasped, "Aren't you a lovely
young woman now?" I tried to look down, but could only get a partial
look at myself. I could see my large perfectly formed breasts, and
between them, the broad flat table of the stomach. Beyond, it dropped
off into nothingness.
"Please, please...." I began to whimper and plead with her. She just
ignored me, and moved around to the end of the table. There she began
examining my new femininity, gently pressing and rubbing here and there
while looking closely at the new me. I could feel every move she made.
"Well OK then. I think we are done here. Welcome to your new life...,
'um... well what shall we call you then? We forgot to give you a
name." She looked at me in anticipation. Suddenly from nowhere, I
blurted out the name "Linda" in my new voice.
"Linda it is, Linda Hammond. I always liked that name - and such a
lovely soft voice too. OK you will be my cousin Linda from...
where?.... Vermont. That's far enough away so that there will be no
chance of anyone checking. So nice to see you are already moving
toward becoming completely female.
"Fuck you!" I yelled at her, but my new voice seemed to not relay the
full measure of my anger.
"Now now," she said. That is no way for a proper young lady to talk.
Look let's get something straight right now," she said as she pointed
her finger at me. "You are no longer Charlie Griffin. Dr. Charles
Griffin is dead and there is no way to bring him back. You are now
Linda Hammond, young prot?g?e of the famous Dr. Marsha Hammond. You
will always be Linda Hammond. You will never again look like Charlie
Griffin, never again sound like Charlie Griffin, and eventually you
will not even think like Charlie Griffin. Shit, soon you won't even
remember Charlie Griffin. You will eventually give in to the
inevitability of your new desires as they grow and grow within you.
And when you finally do, the change will be 100%. This is what you get
for fucking over women all these years. This is the humiliation of not
being able to control your desires such that you want only one thing -
to love and be loved by a man. Welcome to the world of women Linda
Hammond. I hope you enjoy your stay." With that, she turned and
stomped out of the lab. I was left crying on my table.
* * * * * *
I awoke again only to find that I was terribly hungry. My pain was
completely gone except for a little twinge deep within my abdomen.
Still restrained, I tried once again to fight the bonds holding me, but
now I felt that my strength was not what it used to be. I had the
muscles of a woman now, and not the strength that I was used to.
Marsha walked around from behind me, and asked, "How are you doing this
morning Linda?" Linda - that name reverberated in my head. It was at
the same time both sickening and exhilarating.
"I could use some food," I said in my new soft voice.
"I bet you could - it's been about a week now, and you've been living
on bottled nourishment." She paused and gave a sigh. 'Look I hope you
have accepted by now that you are a woman. That the old you is gone
forever and is never coming back. When you think about it, you are
going to need to adapt to this new life whether you want to or not -
you simply have no choice. Now we can do this the hard way - in which
case I will drug you, take you out into the city, and drop you off on a
corner. Or we can do this the easy and correct way, and you can agree
not to try to escape, and I will train you in what you need to know.
Considering that no one would believe your story anyway, I think the
latter choice is the one to consider. What do you say?"
As I began to review the two options, again a rush of emotion came over
me and I began to cry. Marsha came closer and laid herself down across
my breast. "Please don't cry," she said. "Soon you will love your new
life. What do you say?" As she embraced me, I felt a warmth to her
words which instantly made me want to respond in the affirmative. I
said, "But what will happen to me - I'm so afraid?"
"Don't be afraid," she replied. "I won't let anything happen to my
little cousin now." And she embraced again. "All right," I said
weakly, "I will do what you tell me to." As I said those words, I felt
as if a great burden had been lifted from me. I felt, for the first
time since this all began, that it would be OK, and that I perhaps
could continue to live this way. We were bonding as women.
"Ok then - Linda - if you promise...." I will try to work something
out to get you into the big house, off this uncomfortable table, and
begin your training. I think I will have to continue some restraint on
you since if you got the urge to leave, you could get really messed up
out in this nasty world. I don't necessarily want to see you hurt
physically. I just want you to start thinking about your new role."
As she said this, I detected a wry grin on her face, as she turned and
headed toward the door. "I will bring you back some food." she said
and disappeared out the door.
* * * * * *
The next day, Marsha entered the lab and said, "OK I think this is
moving day - what do you say?" I became terribly excited and said "Oh
yes, please Marsha!" Very well, but I think for my safety, I will
sedate you for the move - sorry," and she approached with a syringe she
had picked-up by the door. "Oh please, I won't give you any trouble. I
promise."
"Well OK, but your legs are too weak for you to walk. Let me get the
wheelchair I have and I'll roll you into the big house." I was
becoming more and more excited at the prospect of seeing the outside
world again. I could hardly contain myself.
She returned in a few minutes. As she entered, she hit a button
mounted on the wall next to the door. The end of the lab opened, and
slowly lowered to the ground outside in the barn forming a giant ramp.
"I had to get this equipment in here some how...: she said with a
giggle. "Ok so let's go. I brought you a little something to put on
since it's a little chilly outside." She loosened the straps on my
legs first. Then she said, "See if you can bend your legs. I tried
with great effort, but the pain in my knee and hip were excruciating.
"OK don't push it. Here, let's get these on," and she pulled a pair of
long jogging pants up my legs. With some effort, she lifted my hips
and slid the pants over my ass and up to my waist.
Next she released my arms. "OK let's try to sit up." She grabbed my
arm and together we moved me up into an upright position. As we did, I
felt an unknown weight pressing down on my chest. Looking down, I
could see my unyielding breasts below, mounding outward to perfectly
positioned nipples. "Here we go" she said as she assisted me in
slipping the long sleeved jogging top over my head and feeding my arms
through the sleeves. As she pulled the top down toward my waist, I
felt a kind of togetherness with the fabric as it embraced my new body.
It felt right.
"Here we go," she said again and together we swiveled my legs around
until they were dangling over the table edge. "This is gonna be
tricky," she said, but with her lifting, I plopped down into the seat
of the chair. My ass felt strangely cushioned. She then lifted each
leg in turn, and placed them in the unfolded steps of the chair. Then
we were off.
As she pushed me from the building and out into the open, a burst of
fresh cold air hit me in the face. It felt wonderful - like I was
suddenly free of so many worries - free from that torture chamber. We
continued around the building to the end of the front porch which was
fitted with an ADA ramp. "Glad this was here," she said. With some
effort, she pushed me up the ramp, onto the porch and toward the front
door.
We entered the house, and she paused. "Um - I wanted you to use the
upstairs bedroom, rather than mine down here. Do you think we could
make a try for it?"
"Oh yes, I just want to lay down on something soft for a change," I
said. I hardly knew what I was saying; the words seemed to just come
without thinking. She smiled and moved the chair closer to the stairs.
"OK now hang on to me and the railing and let's try this." We
struggled to get me to my feet, and slowly, one by one, we negotiated
the steps to the upstairs. It took about 10 minutes to reach the top.
Once there, she said, "Let me go down and get the chair now."
"No!" I shot back, "I want to try to walk some more." She smiled, and
assisted me as we worked our way down the upstairs hall to the far
bedroom. Once there, we moved to the bed, and I collapsed on it. We
both gave a very large sigh from the ordeal.
She fixed the pillows at the head of the bed, and said, "OK, now lie
down and rest."
"Yes Ma'am," I said. She stopped and looked at me. "Very good, you are
going to make a fine wife for someone." With that a flash of anger
rushed back through me. I started to retort, but something made me
decide against it. After all, she was only trying to help me now, I
thought. As I lay back, I could feel the pressure of my breasts leave
my shoulders. She swung my legs up onto the bed, and covered me with a
large comforter. As the weight of the fabric pressed on my body, I
curled up slightly and felt warm inside. "Now rest," she said, "I will
bring you some food in a bit. See isn't this so much nicer that that
old metal table?"
"Yes Ma'am," I said without thinking.
* * * * * *
The following day, I awoke to see the sun coming up on the first day of
my n