Theatrical Addendum
- 1 year ago
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The End free porn video
This was a story I wrote in an hour after I spoke with someone on MSN. It
is no work of art, but has many things you can think about
Dear Mom, Dad, Granny, Friends... everyone I know.
I lived on this earth for 12 years. It is now time to say good-bye. I
cannot be me again. I cannot live as me. I am a freak. I am a sinner. I
am so unhappy. If I kill myself, I will be at peace. I will not be afraid
to be me. I know that suicide is a sin, but I need peace.
Mom, You and Dad love me. But would you really love me if you know who I
am. What I did? What I am inside? The truth is that I am a sissy. I feel
like I am a girl inside a boy's body. I feel like that this girl is
punching the boy's body, and wants to come out.
If the girl in me came out, no one would love me. You wouldn't love me.
Dad wouldn't love me. You know me was boy. You want me to play football
and things like that. You want me to like Spider man and action men. If
you knew the truth, you would not love me. You would think that I was a
freak. That the devil himself was in me. I cannot live without you and
Dad loving me.
At school they tease me already. They don't like the fact that I have
long hair and that I am not that strong. They don't think that I am
normal. They call me faggot and sissy. I am not normal. I do not know
what is wrong with me. Did God put me in the wrong body? Did God make a
mistake? Is the devil really in me? Sometimes at night, I take one of my
sisters Barbies. I lie with the Barbie and look at her. I think does she
have a boy in her body, or was she a boy? Because she has no privates. I
cry myself to sleep. This is nearly every night. I hate that I am not
normal. I hate that every day more and more people are finding out. This
is why I have to say goodbye to this world.
Mom, remember that time when I woke up and wet my briefs. I hid in the
toilet and wouldn't come out. I hid the briefs. I know you found them
because they were not there later. I went through my drawers and couldn't
find any briefs or boxers. I started crying. As usual. You came to my aid
and hugged me until I stopped crying. You looked for some briefs and you
couldn't find any. Then you said I could loan my sisters panties. I
started crying again. What if the others seen this at school? They would
call me every name in the world. I could not wear girl's panties, only
girls wore them. You said it would only be for one day so I looked at
them. They were so pretty. I remember to this day what they looked like.
They were white with some lace and they had a picture of a flower on
them. I put them on. They were so soft against my skin. It was nearly
like putting a cloud on. I felt so pretty with them on. It was a shame
that I had to wear trousers on top of them that day at school, I felt
special. I never felt so happy in my life. It was just because I was
wearing panties. I know this sounds weird, and it is. But the easiest way
to explain it is that I was missing a leg or arm until that day. When I
put the panties on. I was myself again. I was whole.
Mom, don't blame yourself. You did not turn me into what I am now. But
from that day, I wanted to be your daughter. You only wanted me to be a
son.
Every time you got my sister a pretty dress or toys. I cried inside and
at nighttime I cried to God. I blamed God for creating me the way I am.
Why did you not buy pretty dresses for me? Why did you not brush my hair
as long as you did with hers? Why did you not buy me the same toys she
had. If you only knew how sad I was, then you would understand. I still
do this, when she gets things and I just can see. It's hard looking and
not being able to enjoy.
You know Louisa. She is my best friend. But she is the only person in the
world who knows who I really am. One day, when I was 9. I was at her
house. We were watching Top Model on TV. It was where these beautiful
women were models. Their clothes were so pretty. Well, Louise tried to
talk to me but I was glued to the TV. Then she knew that I liked it. It
was only when she said that sometimes she played model, then she got my
attention. We went up to her room and she showed me her clothes that she
used for the beauty pageants that her mum makes her go to sometimes. I
don't know why she hates it, because when I first seen the dresses, my
mouth could have caught a thousand flies it was open so much. They were
so pretty and beautiful. They were in the prettiest colours and some were
fluffy dresses and others were like princess dresses and some were party
dresses and sun dresses. Some looked like the ones you wore when you were
a girl Mum.
She put one of them on.
Yes Mum, I did see her in her panties, but I didn't think about what you
want to ask. I just was looking forward to seeing the dress on her. She
put one on. I remember it even though it was 3 years ago. It was white
and went down to her knees; it had puffy short sleeves. I don't think I
said much, I just looked.
Then she shocked me. She said I should try on a dress. I didn't even
argue. I picked this cowboy dress with straps over the shoulder. It had a
rose on the belly. I felt so pretty again in it. Just like that day I
wore the panties, I felt like I was myself again. I wasn't just me, I was
really I. Anyhow she gave me these panties to put on as well, they had
roses and lace and then she helped me put tights on.
I was shocked when I looked in the mirror. I looked exactly like a girl.
I was a girl. I know you probably hate me by now and think I am the worse
child in the world. But I was a girl. I was happy that week, and then I
remembered we went to Church. I don't remember what I was wearing, but I
remember that my sister was sitting beside me, and I wanted too much to
have the Sunday dress she was wearing. I sometimes felt the side of it
when she was sitting down and didn't notice I was feeling it. I felt sad
again.
It didn't help that the priest was talking about sin. He said that if we
sinned we would go to hell. I thought it was a sin wanting to be a girl,
and that meant that I would go to Hell. I tried to listen to what the
priest said, and accepts Gods will. But it was hard.
Every time I thought that I wanted to be a girl. I said a prayer. I felt
so bad. The only time I was happy was when I visited Louise. Every time I
visited her, I dressed in her clothes. I was a girl at her house. She
also thought I was a girl and she we agreed that I was her secret sister.
I was so happy when I visited her. I know I wrote that I was so happy so
many times, but I was. I looked like a girl, played like a girl, treated
like a girl and that made me happy
But every time I came home, I felt sad again. What Louise and I did was
just fantasy. It was just pretend. It was just I acting like a girl. I
thought it was a sin because I was trying to be something that God didn't
want me to be. On top of that, I was not your son that you wanted to be.
I was so ashamed. Life was horrible. It still is. I told you they call me
sissy and gay. They think I am too girly. The truth is they are right.
Mom and Dad, you think it's just a phase. Well, It's a hell of a long
phase to go through. I think all parents turn a blind eye to their
children's fault. And my fear was that you would soon found out who I
really was/am, and hate me for it.
The one time I was happy and am happy was at Louisa's. She really
considered me as her sister. Once I told her that sometimes I pee in my
trousers and I like it. She then came up with an idea to put a diaper on
me. I wasn't at all embarrassed that she seen my private parts. We were
sisters. When she put the diaper on me and a baby dress, I looked in the
mirror. I felt so happy. I looked like her baby sister. This happened
when I was 10. We do it it every time now. I dress as a baby and she
gives me a bottle. I know you probably think that this is some sort of
sex game, but it honestly is not. We do love each other, Louise and me.
But I love her as a big sister and she loves me as a little sister. So
now you know what I go to her house so much.
Once Louisa made me sad. We were looking at TV, and she asked me did I
fancy this boy on TV. I was silent. I thought he was cute. Then she asked
me which boys in school I thought was cute. Without thinking I told her
who it was. She smiled and said I was really a girl. I smiled back, but
part of me felt bad. Especially when I came home. I was once again in my
boy's clothes and was lying down on my bed thinking of boys. I must be
gay. That was the only answer that I have. I must be a freak. I know I am
not a girl. I am just a sissy and a gay, everything you don't want me to
be. It is time that I end it all. Remember that I love you.
Love you and this is the end....
Now is a chance to pee and to get some handkerchiefs or something to
drink. It is advised to wait a few minutes to read the epilogue,
It has been several months since I wrote this letter. The Question you
are asking is if I am in heaven or Hell.
The answer is heaven
But it is heaven on earth. Writing this letter was good for myself. It
let me open my heart not to others, but to myself.
I did not kill myself. I did not commit suicide. Why?
Because Suicide is a sin. God gives us life. He gives us a chance on
earth to learn who we are. He is not a God that will throw us in hell
because we feel that we are confused. He is a God of love and compassion.
He could have made me a sissy. I could even be a girl in a boy's body. I
could even be gay. But after I wrote this letter, I thought there are
children that are being sexually abused. There are children that do not
have hands or feet. There are children that cannot talk or even think.
My problem looks very small compared to these people. This is a proof of
that God loves me.
I never told my parents. I never had shown them this letter. Part of me
thinks that it will hurt them. I would love for them to treat me as a
girl. But I cannot get everything I wish in life.
I have a sister. Louisa that considers me her sister. This is the ray of
light in my life.
I did not kill myself. I know who I am. I know it's a hard challenge that
I got in life. I know people will hate me if they find out. I know they
will tease me. But I know who I am. I accept it. I will live with it and
enjoy when I am allowed to be a girl.
This is not the end. It's a beginning.
This story is free, the only price is that I would like to hear from you
What is going through your mind when you read this? What do you feel
about the characters? What do you hope will happen? Tell me or if you
have any questions, ask. Also if you want me to reply to you or
add/contact you on msn, let me know.
Even if you hate me and want to give out to me and call me names, send me
a message.
If you have any feed back or suggestions or would like this to be
continued send me a message : [email protected]
Ofelia
- 14.04.2021
- 8
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