Gun Culture Chapter 5 free porn video

Hank, nervously watched the road, feeling sick to his stomach inside. His dads patrol car was accelerating up the road now, slow enough to maintain his usual caution but fast enough too for the emergency. Janus's mother had gone with him in the ambulance, but not before letting Kirk out of his bedroom where she'd apparently locked him up. Hank knew because he'd had to be the one to let him out in Janus' mother's panic. Kirk had been uncaring when Hank had told him the news, but he hadn't really reacted to it either. Hank had thought he might have been angry at seeing Kirk after all he had done, but all he felt really was just a feeling of contempt and a cold burn that seemed much worse in the end. Hank's father pulled into the drive, and he pushed himself up out of his car. Hank had to gulp a little at how impressive a figure his father was in his official capacity. His jaw was set firmly right now giving the impression of a man on the edge of following the rules to the unbending letter. He came forwards, and with a few choice words he dispersed the small crowd of onlookers who had seen the ambulance and the few others who had come running as soon as the gossip had spread around. Hank's father's hand pulled at his shoulder and he was led forwards into the passenger seat of the car. It seemed a long few moments, listening to the crunch of his father's boots until he opened the driver's side and slid back into the car. "Hank," he said calmly. "Why don't you just tell me what happened tonight?" Hank swallowed and nodded, thinking that in a large way, he'd been responsible for what Janus had done to himself. It wasn't fair and it wasn't right, and to be honest Janus no longer seemed like the normal guy he had appeared to be a few days before, but he knew that it was all real. "I... I was coming over to apologise," Hank said. "I'd had an argument with J..Janus at school. Red made me think about it and I guess I was wrong..." Hank paused. "She said I should say I was sorry. I came over, knocked on the door and Jan's mother answered the door. She went and I heard her scream... I've never heard anyone scream like that... I just knew... that something had happened..." "What happened then?" Hank's dad probed. "I went in," Hank said. "I didn't wait. I'd been in his house before and I knew which room was his... I stood in his door and for a moment I couldn't believe what I was seeing. It wasn't like the Janus I knew at all." "That's the shock," Hank's father said. "Carry on..." "He was hanging from his ceiling fan. His eyes were wide... so wide..." Despite his natural calm, Hank felt the tears welling up. He couldn't believe how one person could change so much in a day or two that they'd end up so much worse than Janus had been before he'd joined the group. "His mother was crying, clutching at him. I saw the chair on the floor and I pushed it back up. I had out my pocketknife and I stood on the chair and cut through the rope. I don't know how I did that. I was in a kind of daze," Hank gulped. "Janus fell to the floor, and I jumped down and turned him over. I pulled the rope out from around his neck and for a moment his eyes seemed to look at me. I knew he was dying, so I did the only thing I could think of to do. I tried CPR." Hank's father sighed heavily. Then he reached out and squeezed Hank's shoulder. "That's the whole truth?" He asked and Hank nodded. "What was the argument about Hank?" "It... It was about Amie sir..." Hank said, feeling his control sagging again. He always called his dad sir when he didn't want to admit the truth but knew that he had to. It was just instinctive. "What about her?" "Janus had... had been kissing Amie... and I caught them. Amie's Leon's girl and I was really pissed at him." "Did you fight?" "No. We just argued," Hank felt the silence closing in around him now, his father might not have done it on purpose, he was a good cop, but it was easily interpreted as a silence of disbelief as well as just the thinking time that Hank knew it was. "Janus has been acting strange today dad," He said. "This afternoon, at sports, he was wearing a bra under his shirt. Everyone could see it, and when I argued with him he started crying. He's really not been himself just lately." "Ok..." Hank said. "Anything else?" "No sir," Hank said, and then remembered Kirk, and his mind wondered if he really wanted to admit what Kirk had done. He guessed in the end though, that that could also have contributed. "There was one thing," Hank said, feeling perhaps as if this had gone beyond the petty rivalry that the group could have visited on Kirk. There were no excuses for holding back for personal reasons. "Janus's brother, Kirk. From what we were able to find out, Kirk tried to molest Red." This time the silence was obviously a stunned one. "No wonder that girl's been acting so strange," Hank's dad said. "Everything about today was strange dad," Hank said, feeling that the gap between them was drawing closer again. "It's like we entered the twilight zone." "What happened with Kirk?" Hank's dad asked. "Well... he cornered her, and from what Teloni said he was bullying her with sexual comments. Teloni said that he grabbed her pendant." "That dragon necklace?" his dad interrupted, and Hank knew that some part of Red's dependence on that trinket had been understood there. Hank nodded. "Teloni pulled him off her and put him down on the floor. I heard the commotion and I knew there was trouble. We were laying into Kirk when the teacher arrived." Hank's dad gave a small mirthless chuckle. "You like Angelina don't you?" his dad asked. Hank wondered for a moment. He knew what his dad meant but... "Yeah," he said, telling himself to shut up. "Everyone likes Red." "Yup," his dad said, starting up the engine. "She's a popular girl. A little headstrong, but I bet she'd make a fine girlfriend." Hank knew that his dad was suggesting that he be Red's boyfriend but to be honest, he knew that he didn't need to. Red was close enough to him for him to luxuriate in her, but remote enough so that she didn't involve him in her problems. Hank knew the kind of girl that Red was, and he wasn't sure exactly if that was what he wanted in a girl. You couldn't help but worry about Red, and Hank didn't want to worry about his partner, at least not that way. How could he tell his father that he'd realised just that day that he wasn't really the right person for her. "I think Teloni is planning on finding out," Hank said, not even realising it until he said it. "Ahh." There was a silence between them then, and it seemed odd to Hank that he should be thinking about Red just now. One of his best friends was on his way to hospital now in a very critical condition but all he could think of was a stuttering girl who, to face facts, probably didn't think of him in that way at all. Red had a unique understanding with all of them, in some ways she was one of the spokes of the group, one of the epicentres which strengthened everyone else, but for all that and for all that she could understand about all the others, she was still a girl and could only know so much about what and how boys thought about her, about how Hank felt about her. "Meryll came into my office last night," his father said. "You know Meryll, right?" Hank nodded. She was his father's secretary but she also handled the radio for the two Deputies and his father too. She was a rather stern character really, he remembered, knitted cardigans and knitting needles in her hair, which was rolled up into a tight bun usually. "She asked me for a day off next week," Hank's father added. Hank wondered why he was telling him this now off all times, what was the point. "Oh?" Hank asked, uninterested. He remembered the way Janus' eyes had been bugging out and he cringed. How could Hank have driven him to it? It really didn't make sense at all. How could anyone take such a deep turn out of something so mundane as an argument? "She said her daughter was teaching her to snowboard, up in Jefferson." Hank paused, that was a strange picture. Meryll was past fifty and the thought of her cannoning down the slopes on a little piece of plastic was... well... practically funny. "My point is, Hank," his dad continued as they turned onto the street where their home was, "that no matter how much you know someone, they can always surprise you by what you don't know about them. I've known Meryll for thirty years, and I never knew that about her. But sometimes it works the other way too. Sometimes life can just take a bite out of a person and that person just acts way over the top. It's not rational. It's not sane. But it happens." The car pulled to a stop outside their house. "I'll go to the hospital now because I need to get a statement from Janus' mother. I'll phone you when the doctors know how bad his condition is. Don't feel guilty about what you did to Janus either. You're his friend and you were just worried about him, at some level he knows that too." "Thanks dad," Hank said, looking up. It felt good to hear that he'd done the right thing, even if he didn't quite believe it yet. Teloni was very aware of Red as she sat beside him on the couch, he felt hot and nervous enough that he might be sweating but oddly enough he didn't seem to be either. He really didn't know why he felt so nervous. Jenny hadn't made him react this way and she'd been going out with him for three months, right up until his expulsion. She'd have found someone else by now because she hadn't sent him a text after that commiserations one, nor had she answered his replies. But Red wasn't at all like Jenny. Red, like all girls, was vulnerable at a level a guy like him could understand, but the truth was that she was exceptionally vulnerable somehow. But even now his thoughts kept moving back towards her, to the memory of the feel of her lips when he'd kissed her. There was magic in her that had never been in Jenny, not even in the most intimate moments between them. But she was strong too; Strong because of her vulnerability, most likely. He'd heard what Kirk had been saying to her and he knew that words like that could shatter a person in the right setting, and Kirk had that and more on his side when he used them. She'd bounced back from that though, and it was probably something to do with her pendant, but she had come back to normal and probably to better than normal. She was just so unbelievably interesting that he could hardly believe either her, or himself. It was like she had infected his mind with herself somehow so that he couldn't stop thinking about her. It wasn't her body, which was about as perfect as he could have dreamed, it was her character too, it was the mystery about her. She stuttered so much but she still had all these other friends who were loyal to her. There was no question that Hank was being protective of her, and even Jamie who Teloni had a growing friendship for had shown his reserve at the affection with which Red had offered to the new outsider. It was all so completely intriguing that it was fascinating in ways and complexities that Teloni had never really felt before. He had little doubt that there had always been these type of feelings in his life and wandering to date, most of which he had clearly wandered through seeing nothing of them, but since the day had started he had felt that this town was uniquely different. Just a sparse few more hours and it would be exactly a day since he had woken up, dreading the school day ahead of him. Now, at the end of that day it seemed like he'd acquired five or six friends, one of which seemed to be a kind of girlfriend. He felt her delicate hand resting on his hip and he shivered with the joy of it. Even more precious was the feeling that Red was a puzzle that he could unravel. He realised he'd been staring at her as she turned. She didn't look annoyed, just a little bemused, and he smiled a little awkwardly. It had been exactly the same way with Jenny hadn't it? He'd just jumped headlong into it and yeah ok they had some good times, but maybe the depth of the relationship was what might have made it more interesting for Jenny, so that she wouldn't have tossed him aside so readily. It had been harsh really, the more he thought about it and he felt mad at her still. Since meeting Red though, he'd hardly thought at all about her. Teloni turned his eyes back to the screen as Jamie tossed his controller to him. Darren laughed, sitting in the single chair to the side. For an older guy, he seemed better than he aught to be at this game. Teloni selected his character; grinning as he leaned forwards, better to concentrate on the screen. When it became clear to me that nobody was going to be able to knock off my brother from his winning streak, my interest in the game kind of faded a little. Darren was a good guy, but he enjoyed winning too much. My eyes drifted up to the clock and I realised that it had been two hours now since Hank had left on his errand to fetch Janus. For a moment I wondered if Hank had actually done as I had suggested he should. He probably had because he had a very strong sense of what was fair and what wasn't and he wasn't above swallowing his pride and owing up. I pushed myself up to my feet and stepped sidewards off the sofa taking my sleeping bag from the radiator and laying it down on the floor, facing the TV. I had my bed upstairs but ever since I was a kid I'd loved these things. They made carpets as comfortable and warm as beds and they made you feel as safe as if you were wrapped in a duvet. I pushed myself down into it laid out on my stomach, watching as Darren won yet again. Teloni offered the controller to me but I shook my head, and Jamie looked determined as he took it back and started in with a fresh fight against my brother. Instead of watching though, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and flipped it open. My fingers were well practiced as I pressed out the message "What's taking you so long? You're missing all the fun. J and T are trying to beat Darren but he keeps winning," I clicked send and then Hank. A moment later and it flashed up sent. I closed the phone and then placed it onto the low table in front of the sofa. I'd not even withdrawn my hand before the phone began to ring. That was strange and it gave me pause for a second. One of the reasons I owned the phone was texting, but voice calls... as you can imagine, are high up there on the list of unused features. I picked the phone up again and flipped it open, putting it to my ear. "H-h-h-hello?" I stammered. "Red, it's Hank," The voice said on the other end, he seemed to be out of breath. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I've been kind of mixed up for the last hour or so since my dad dropped me off," I pushed myself up into a sitting position, I could hear fear in my friend now and I didn't like it. "H-h-hank... w-w-w-w-whats w-w-" "It's Janus," Hank said quickly, cutting me off. "He's... He's in the hospital." Suddenly I felt ice clutching at my heart. I heard Hank sob on the other end, and I knew that it was serious. "Shit Red," Hank said and I could hear he wasn't far away from tears himself. "I didn't mean for this... I didn't... I..." "N-n-n-n-n-n-not y-y-y-your f-f-f-fault," I said as quickly as I could. "C-c-c-come b-b-b-back." "I can't," Hank said. "Dad said he's going to phone when he knows how bad J.J. is." "W-w-w-w-what h-h-h-h-h-h-h-happened?" I stammered, feeling every word ripping from me, jagged with longing. "J.J.," Hank said quietly. "He tried to hang himself." Quite suddenly, everything seemed to stop for me. Everything was suddenly completely mixed up in my mind, thoughts coming and going too fast for me to even digest, just their meanings building up and up and up into a cobweb of guilt and self hatred. Was this because of me, had my change somehow turned J.J. into something else, exposing some hugely depressive part of his character? Had it been something I said to him that had started him on this spiral. How had it all happened so fast? Quite suddenly my chest was burning and I took in a breath, but I was unable to hold it as my body juddered. I took in another and then another quicker and more rapid so that I could get the air back into me. Darren was there in a moment; he plucked the phone away from me and made me lean back a little against his knee. "Who is this?" My brother demanded, angrily, watching me. He mimed taking a deep breath and looking up into his face I felt a little better inside. My brother's face changed instantly to puzzlement as he listened to Hank on the other end. I concentrated my effort on trying to breathe, to resist the panic that was settling like a stone in my chest. Then suddenly, the image seemed to strike. Quite suddenly in one long burning second I saw J.J. hanging, the body twisting gently and unmoving and I felt a fierce wave of nausea sweep through me. The image vanished just as quickly as it came but its imprint was left on my imagination. I heard Hellcat's calm voice. "Just relax yourself Red," she whispered. "Just think about breathing. That's all you have to do." I nodded and forced myself to stop taking the thin panting breaths and to string one out. I reached up and grasped the pendant and quite suddenly the spell seemed to be over. The stone in me was replaced with a river of cool water and my breath seemed to come again without effort even if I was breathing fast. "Right," Darren said, his voice heavy and serious. "Right yes. All right Hank. Yes, try and phone your father. Tell him I'll take you to the hospital. We'll clean up here and then we'll be straight round." I glanced up at Jamie and Teloni, both of who were looking between Darren and me now they were both looking scared. Darren closed my phone and put a hand on my shoulder. "Ok now Red?" He asked. I nodded. Darren looked up at the two boys. "Your friend Janus, he's been rushed to hospital." "Janus?" Jamie asked. "Why?" Darren looked uncomfortable. "Apparently he tried to hang himself," My brother paused. "Turn everything off and get your coats. We're going to Hank's house." Hanks arm was around me as we stepped into the room where Janus's body lay. Strangely enough, I hadn't cried. I'd felt like I wanted to, and my new instincts had seemed uncannily ready to make that choice, but I hadn't shed a tear no matter how badly I though I should. I could feel a deep sense of despair when I looked at him, laid on the bed. J.J. in all his power was practically gone. I remembered the touch of his hand that very morning. I remembered that I'd woken up in his room. How wrong a day had this been? It seemed as if nothing had been done for the better since Hellcat had entered my life. It was like everything she did turned sour and evil. J.J.'s mother was sitting by the bed, holding her son's hand in her fingers, crying into it as she held it against her face. I stepped away from Hank, approaching the bed on the other side to J.J.'s mother and I took hold of his hand. His fingers were warm and as the ugly life support machines behind him beeped softly, I reached up and grasped hold of my pendant. Quite suddenly everything fell away. Teloni watched, as Hank carried the limp body back out of the room. At first he wasn't sure of what he was seeing, but as he blinked, he rose up feeling a sudden rush of concern for the girl who had become his friend. Hank was crying as he lowered her down into one of the chairs opposite the door and Teloni saw the worried eyes of Darren watching as he was. Hank wiped at his eyes with his sleeve and turned and regarded the two of them as if seeing them for the first time. He seemed suddenly ashamed by his own tears and although Teloni wanted to reach out to him, it was Darren who did. "She's just fainted," Hank said. "But let her sleep." Darren nodded. "Alright." Teloni sat back down next to Red and he reached out and touched her hand. The two sat across from him and quite suddenly, Teloni felt a sudden urge to turn and look at them, to explain why he had come along when Red had told him he didn't have to, but as he turned their expressions checked him. Hank, it seemed had mastered his tears once again, leaning forwards he was looking at the floor sadly. Darren was looking straight at him but his expression wasn't anything very much but worried understanding. Teloni felt the fingers in his twitch and at the same time, the mysterious part of his character seemed to show its head once again. Quite suddenly he knew beyond doubt that Red's sleep this time wasn't natural. She hadn't fainted as Hank had supposed, or if she had then she'd gone deep down inside herself. She felt empty now, as though her spirit had left her. Teloni panicked, but he didn't know what he should do. He wondered if he should ask Darren to send for a nurse who might bring Red round, or at least find out why she couldn't wake up. The fingers twitched in his hand again and he paused, suddenly unsure. Maybe she was just in a deeper kind of sleep and she'd wake up soon enough. He didn't think she was hurting, not from the image he'd received. She'd felt empty but she hadn't felt dead. Quite suddenly someone walked by. He hadn't even seen them coming but he looked up into the face of a young nurse. She smiled, looking right at him as she walked by. She had one of those square white caps on the top of her head and a big red cross on the front of her uniform. She carried on past him and his eyes turned to track her, wondering if he should say something, get her to check Red. But all of a sudden, she faded away in the air. Teloni closed his eyes, and tried to close his mind as he looked at the floor. He knew what the nurse had been. His 3rd person had a kind of sight and he could see ghosts in a few places where death was a regular visitor. His parents had taken him to see his grandfather when he'd been little. They hadn't been able to afford a good home for him having just come to the country, and that home was too full of the slowly shifting dead, moving forever between corridor to room to corridor to room. It had been horrible and it had given him nightmares for months. He never told his parents about the ghosts but just said it was the old people of the home. They accepted that and they didn't take him to that place again. The nurse hadn't exactly been a nurse; he knew that because he knew a little more about ghosts than he had at that early age. She wasn't just a nurse, she was a representation of all the nurses who had worked in this hospital for long periods, and had sufficient desire to return here afterwards. That was the hell of it really, and what made them so frightening. That's why the people with half gifts see madness within the ghosts and strong suffering. That was one of the reasons he wanted to follow Red to this place, to see if she saw the ghosts too, although it wasn't the main reason which was brutally honest and yet too weak to admit to himself. He'd sensed that Red had something in those showers and he'd known it all the time he'd been with her since. He'd briefly detected it again just before her kid brother had interrupted them down in the swimming pool room under Darren's house. He could still feel that slim sliver of her character there still, but the rest of her aura felt empty. Her fingers twitched again and he glanced at her hand. He wondered who this girl was, who was she really? I opened my eyes slowly, drifting up out of sleep in a moment as I blinked. Fog was streaming down over me and I felt it's airy tendrils massaging my arms and hands with the lightest touches. I realised in another moment that I was standing and I looked down to see clean grass underneath my naked feet. I didn't know where I was, but I felt a little happy. The fog was like stroking fingers against my head and I smiled, feeling content with myself and at peace. "Angel!" someone said and I turned. J.J. was stood a few feet away from me, his wide shoulders stretching the grey t-shirt he was wearing and his blonde hair looking clean and fresh. "J.J," I said, letting the smile come up. I held out my hand and he came forwards. At the same time I reached up to my pendant to let the words come easier. I needed my concentration right now. "Am I dreaming you Red?" Janus asked, watching me. His eyes were more brilliant than I'd ever known them to be before. I shook my head. "I don't know." The words came out perfectly flawless. Janus smiled. "I always loved you Red. I wanted to be your boyfriend after you changed." "I think I might have liked that too Janus," I said, feeling the tears welling up in my eyes. This time I didn't try and stop them. "Am I dead?" Janus asked, his voice husky with dread. I shook my head. "No. Not yet." He let out a breath. "Why did you do it Janus?" I asked. "You beat your eating problem, what could have driven you to this so quickly? You know I'll always help you. We all will always help you." He drew me closer against himself and I put my arms around him, feeling the fog swirling all around us. "I was confused," Janus said. "I know that Hank hates me now. I destroyed his confidence and I'm not sure why I did that now." "Hellcat said that there'd be upheaval," I said. "She told us everything would be alright at the end of it." "Not exactly," Janus said. And then we both heard the voices calling from the fog. They were saying my friend's name. Reflexively, my arms, which had been thrust around him, tightened their grip. "I'm scared Red," Janus said carefully. "Don't you leave me," I said, renewing my grip around him. "Don't you leave me." "I don't think I have that choice Red," He said, sadly. "You always have a choice!" I said angrily, because I knew he was giving up. "You always had the choice to eat, you just needed to believe it. Now believe with me J.J.. I believe you can survive. Help me." "Red..." he said. "You've got to let go." "NO!" My voice surprised even me. I didn't want him to go though. I didn't want him to die because he was my friend and he was one of the few people in the world I could talk to openly about my own magical change. "This is my fault and I renounce it now. I'll be a guy again if it'll bring you back. I'll live with my problems and I'll do it so that you can live J.J. I won't loose you." Janus looked up, turning his head to the fog. I lifted my own head and looked at his face. There were tears on my cheek but I was determined now. I wouldn't let go. J.J.'s face was scared as he glanced back at me. "Hold on to me Red," He said. "I don't want to die." "I w-w-won't l-l-let y-y-you," I said smiling a little, even though I sensed that it was almost hopeless. I watched his eyes and I saw some kind of internal battle raging in his face, he twitched a little, looking over my head. There was no real emotion for a moment in his features but then I saw anguish closing over him, his eyes unfocused and then refocused horrified down onto my face. "I remember it all," he said, looking half sick. "Oh god. I hung myself..." It wasn't news to me, and I kept my grip around him, knowing that if this was all I was going to remember him for, then I was going to string this out for as long as I could. If it really were hopeless, then I would make the gods wait. "My names Jane, not Janus," he said, looking down at me. "Don't you remember, Angel?" "Jane?" I said, confused, the name meant something to me, but I couldn't remember. Had that been the name Hank had used at the baseball game? "My name is Jane," Janus said with conviction. "Janus, I know you were confused. She said there would be confusion. I know you wanted to be like me but you've..." "No Red," he cut me off. "You remember the mine when you were cleaning hellcat? You remember I took my shirt off for you because I knew you'd be sweet about it and that you'd enjoy it." "What has that..." I asked, confused but then the image flashed up. Janus had been wearing a bra, hadn't he? But hadn't those cups been full? They were... And what if time had done that trick that Hellcat had said, wouldn't it just be exactly what she warned us about if Janus really had been a girl called Jane? I stood there confused and I felt my friend being pulled away. It was gentle, but it was almost irresistible. I tightened my grip, holding fiercely on but my hands slipped. Then it all came up to the surface, blowing away all the untruths in my mind about my friend. Jane stood there, in front of me slipping away, she still looked like Janus but I could see that her body was already changing back. "JANE!" I said, feeling my hands slipping around the sides of her and then I realised I wasn't holding on to her at all. "JANE!!" I shouted and she smiled sadly. I tried to take a step forwards but my feet were suddenly too heavy. Suddenly the fog was solid around me, curling around my body, pulling me back. "JANE!" I shouted once more, feeling that the link which bound her and me was beginning to snap and warp. "I always loved you Red," she said, now fully back to how she had been. I saw tears on her face and I reached up a hand towards her, impossibly far away. "I love you too J.J.," I said, sensing that the fight was over for us. The fog flowed over my friend, falling forwards in a cloud over her head and in a moment she was gone. Teloni saw the mist without fully realising it as it flowed out from under the door. It was silver and it moved across the floor as he watched, blinking once as he realised that it was all flowing in the same direction. It moved quickly and like a cloud as he watched. It rose up in a lazy arc and then sort of fell forwards over Red's chair, vanishing immediately. Red's hand twitched again and this time, he returned the hold with a stronger grip of his own, feeling her coming back into herself, her strength and her aura coming back to life. I opened my eyes, feeling the sense of loss still with me. Janus had been Jane all along. I'd been cruel too when I was trying to help her. I hadn't understood, hadn't even seen that she was telling the truth because I'd been sure in my belief that Janus had always been the true character and not Jane. I could hardly believe that I'd been duped so well and so quickly. I glanced around and saw Darren was watching me from across the Hall. Teloni's hand was in mine and I felt endearing warmth towards him, bitter with the laced tragedy. Suddenly there was a sharp noise and feet were running from both directions along the corridor. Five or six people shot past us, opening Jane's room door before any of us could react. I heard a startled shout of Jane's mother in the room. Darren and Hank started to rise, but I didn't move. I knew what was happening. I knew why I'd been allowed the final moments of J.J.'s life. She was dying and there was nothing that anyone could do now. J.J.'s mother appeared, stepping backwards out of the room as a nurse closed the door on her. Darren stepped to the mother's side immediately, touching her shoulder. "The machines..." J.J.'s mother said then repeated herself, a look of horrified shock on her face. Darren led her to the chairs and Hank helped. It struck me suddenly then that I didn't want to be here when it happened. When J.J. passed, I didn't want to be here because I sensed with uncanny certainty that I would feel it and it would be horrible. It would leave my heart empty and hollow. I stood up and began to run. "Red!" My brother called but I didn't stop. I ran down the long corridor, tears in my eyes and pushed through the doors at the end, out into the cold night. I stood there and someone walked right by me into the hospital as I moved onto the grass at the side. I didn't know where I was going, but I leant up against the wall of the building anyway, breathing in the cool night air. "H-h-how c-c-could you l-l-l-let this h-h-happen to us HC?" I asked, under my breath. "H-h-h-how c-c-c-could you l-let m-m-me b-b-b-believe it..." "Good evening, my daughter," A voice said and I turned my head. Not really wanting to be distracted from my internal battle of rage and grief against HC. The man was a priest though, I saw. I saw the cross on the front of his black tunic. It was kind of idyllic as though he were playing a priest in an old movie. I nodded, unable to speak. I felt a sudden rush of anguish. The priest's breath was cold in the air, drifting out as fading steam. "I know what you're going through child," the priest said. I felt like laughing at the clich?, but the thought left me as quickly as it appeared. "It's hard, and it's all mixed up inside. You don't know why it happened, but it has," The priest continued, watching me. I nodded again, biting my lip. "You've got a powerful aura," The priest said turning and leaning back like me against the wall. "Did you know?" He paused, but I didn't try and answer, I couldn't. I reached up and gripped my pendant again. "I think one day you're going to grow up to be strong. But I can see your hurting right now." I turned but I still couldn't find the words to tell him I didn't want to hear his spiel right now. I just wanted to be alone. "It was my wife," he continued, looking away towards the road. "She passed away in nineteen forty four. I walked out here, and stood close to where we are now. I hated god for what he had done to me, even though I had given to him all of my life. My heart was raw with pain and confusion, but it cleared after a while," He paused. "The pain goes away and the feelings fade. Slowly, I began to realise that God had taken Mary from me because it had been his mercy to do so. She was dying of the cancer and every day was a torment to her, the painkillers were not enough for her most days and it slowly dawned on me that God had chosen to end her suffering rather than allowing it to continue." He turned his head and looked at me again. "God has a plan, little sister. He acts everyone into it and he plays his fingers with mercy and forgiveness." "I t-t-t-t-think t-t-t-t-this is p-p-p-punishment r-r-r-rather t-t-t- than f-f-f-forgiveness," I stammered, my grief drawing out the words. "I've d-d-d-d-done s-s-s-s-some b-b-b-bad t-t-t-t-t-things. I t-t-t-t- think I'm d-d-d-d-damned already." "Nobody is beyond redemption," the priest said passionately with a shake of his head. "Even in the darkest evil there's always a glimmer of light. Even in the darkest demons, there's always glimmers of compassion." I glanced at him, wondering if he knew. How could he know? "Red!" I heard and I turned to see Teloni stepping across the grass towards me. Distracted, I turned back, but the priest was gone. There hadn't been a sound, but he was gone. I even saw the last wisp of white breath as it faded in the air. I stood there stunned until a moment later when Teloni touched my shoulder. "D-d-d-did y-y-you s-s-s-s-s..." I started but the words ripped at my throat. Teloni glanced to the side, towards where the priest had been but his eyes moved over the rest of the park. "What was it?" he asked. "I only saw a shadow." I blinked surprised and he turned back to face me. "A p-p-priest," I said, watching his eyes, wondering if he was toying with me. Teloni nodded. He didn't even look surprised. I narrowed my eyes a little as I watched him, scrutinising him now. Could he be lying? I remembered the last curl of breath in the air and I felt a shudder running through me. "Was it a ghost?" Teloni asked. "I've been able to see them for a while." I shook my head. "I d-d-d-don't kn-n-n-now." Teloni nodded, his eyes caught mine now and I saw again the depth of fascinating colour that I hadn't seen since the classroom. Now, his eyes were like pools of water. I don't know why I felt safer, looking into them but I did. "Red..." Teloni asked, watching me. "When you fainted in there... did you dream something?" I blinked remembering the fog and J.J.'s last goodbye. The pain was too much, erupting raw tears filled my eyes and I looked down, wanting to hide them. Part of me was still a guy and guys didn't cry. It just wasn't the way. "Red. I wish I could help you somehow. I wish I could do something," Teloni said. "I don't know why, and I don't know how, but I want to help you," He paused, taking me forwards into his arms. It was too easy for me to put my arms around him, even though I'd only met him that morning. For a moment, I was holding J.J. again and I tightened my grip around him. As the illusion faded though, I knew I didn't want to let up on him. I tried to tell myself that I didn't know enough about this guy yet, but I just didn't want to listen. I felt and heard the breath in his chest and more tears came, spilling out of me. I didn't want her to die. I didn't want to lose my friend. I remembered that she'd bought Hellcat for me and I knew that every time I used my gun now, it would always signify the memory of Jane as much as the memory of HC. "Y-y-y-yes," I said. "I d-d-d-d-d-dreamed about J.J." I felt his body moving as he nodded slightly. "That's what I thought," he said. "You've got something Red," He said simply. "You've..." "Red!" Hank said and I turned, looking over towards the entrance. "J.J.'s awake. He's asking for you." A kind of surprised shock overtook me then and I felt my mind becoming a kind of blank. It was strange and I don't think I felt any of the steps between there and J.J.'s room, I don't even remember much of it. Hank watched as he saw the realisation steeping over Red. She didn't move for a moment then she let go of the new kid and ran towards the entrance. Teloni had the cheek to even look a little offended that Hank had interrupted what had obviously been an attempt to ingratiate himself further with Angel. Hank felt a sudden rush of anger and as Teloni took a step forwards, back towards the corridor, Hank reached out and grabbed him. He lifted Teloni off his feet, balled fists in his shirt and rushed forwards so that the kid's back slammed into the side of the building beside the entrance. He saw the fear in the kid's face and a part of him welcomed it. "Now you listen here Teloni," Hank said menacingly. "I know Angel likes you, and I recognise that you've done a lot for her today. But let me tell you one thing before you go any further with us. If you have any intentions that are not entirely how they appear, if you hurt Red in any way, shape, or form, then I will personally snap your neck with my own hands," He paused, keeping his voice low and menacing. Teloni had to know that he was serious about this. He wasn't willing to take the chance of anything else. "Do you understand that?" "I understand," Teloni said, not even struggling now. He looked fairly placid even. Hank lowered him back to the ground. He was about to turn back, knowing that Janus might need him too. Hank meant to apologise to him. He wanted to tell him that he was sorry and didn't mean to say those things he had said. Red had been right about that. He hadn't meant it all; there had just been so many words and too much confusion. He wasn't confused now though, he knew exactly what he was doing. Teloni grabbed Hanks arm and Hank looked back. "You love her, don't you?" Teloni asked. Hank nodded. "Yes." He paused. "I love everyone who's a part of the club. It's my club and nobody would be there if I didn't want them to be. But Red is special, yes." "What's so special about this club?" Teloni asked. "Jamie wouldn't tell me, and neither would Red," He paused, watching Hank carefully and Hank wondered if perhaps, he could tell him. Teloni shook his head though. "I'm sorry Hank. Now isn't the time." That at least was true and Hank turned and ran back towards the hospital room. When I entered. I saw that Janus was still laid on the bed. But I saw a different person in his face this time. I saw that Jane was there, behind his face. I saw that Janus's face was drawn, and there were puffs under his eyes, but the gaze was strong as it fixed on me. I stepped up to the side of his bed quickly, and his hand rose up from the sheet. I took it quickly, feeling the strong muscles in his hand, so strange and different now. "J.J.," I said, knowing that I couldn't use his proper name now, I couldn't say Janus because that was a lie and it might do much more than I realise if I gave the lie strength again. I might start to believe it again. "Why did you do it Janus?" his mother asked. Holding his other hand. "Why did you do it?" "Mom," J.J. said, turning his eyes to look at her. "I was confused," His voice was weak but firm and I knew he had control of himself again. "I'm not confused any more though. I'm sorry I hurt you." His mother wept then, but I felt a little removed from her tears now and I couldn't really connect with them. All I felt was just uncertainty, and I kind of private terror for my friend. "Thanks for holding on, Red," J.J. said, looking back at me. That time I felt the tears rising up, and I knew that in some way, I had been allowed to save Jane as she stood on the very brink of death. That made it twice really, and I wouldn't take either back. "Mom," J.J. said, turning his head a little, "will you give us a second alone?" His mum raised her head a little and I winced, imagining the argument to come. She might even hate me now. "But Janus, you might..." J.J. shook his head. "I won't," he answered and there was resolve in his voice now. I felt a little awed. His mother looked stunned but I saw that she too had picked up the new resolve in her so... in her child. "Ok," she said stunned and shocked. "I'll just be outside." She stepped up and went to the door, closing it behind her. I saw her grimace as she passed me as though she wasn't sure if she were doing the right thing. "J...J...Jane?" I asked, as soon as she was gone. Janus nodded. "I remember." She paused. "Hellcat," She said carefully. "Change me back." I felt the power as it flowed down my arm then; I felt it flowing through into Janus's fingers. I felt his hand softening and I looked down at it seeing J.J.'s hand there now. When I looked up again, I saw it was Jane now in the bed and Janus was back wherever he had come from. Jane smiled, but I could see that she was weak. "This feels so weird," Jane said, her voice higher now, but still trembling. "Jane. I'm s-s-s-sorry," I said, my other hand reaching up for my pendant again. "I s-s-s-s-should h-h-h-have l-l-l-l-listened to y-y- you." "It's alright Red," Jane said, her voice betraying the smile on her face as I glanced up to see it. "I should have trusted you more. I should have done a lot of things, and I'm going to make them right. I'm going to make everything right again. Is Amie here?" I shook my head. "I s-s-s-s-sent h-h-her a text b-b-b-but s-s-s-she hasn't r-r-r-replied." Jane nodded. "I love you Angel." I nodded. "I love you too J-Jane." Jane smiled, but I could see that the conversation was tiring her now. "I'll b-be outside," I said quickly. Jane watched me, the smile on her face plain but tired. "Go home Red," she said. "You need your rest too. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine now." I nodded, drawing my hand out of hers and I stepped towards the door. As soon as I drew the door open though, Jane's mother was just outside and stepped in through it before I could exit. She didn't even look at me as she came in, just looked at the bed towards her daughter, and then she went to her side. I stepped back out into the corridor, pulling the door closed. Darren was at my side in a moment. "Angel?" he asked. I turned and looked at him then I nodded, telling him that it was fine. "S-s-s-she's ok. S-s-s-she'll b-be f-f-fine n-n-now." Darren nodded, watching my eyes. I turned and saw Teloni and Hank watching me. Hank still looked uncertain and afraid. I lifted a hand and touched his arm. The touch brought him back. "Lets go home then," Darren suggested. "Or do you want to stay?" "I'll stay," Hank said quickly. I turned and looked at him. It was clear that whatever the reason for it now, the argument had still been there even when history had altered back. It was clear that Hank still felt guilty about what he'd said. If there were one thing that I was sure of though it was that history would work itself out. Somehow, the kinks would come together and everything would be seamless. Causality had a terrible power. I did something strange then; I stepped forwards and kissed Hank's cheek. "Good luck Hank," I whispered, stepping back. He nodded, watching me, and then he turned and sat back down on the seats next to the wall. I turned and looked at Teloni. "Thanks f-f-f-for c-c-c-coming Teloni," I said. He shook his head. "No problem Red." Darren put his hand on Teloni's shoulder. "Lets go," he said. Teloni watched Red as she walked ahead of him with her brother. He sighed and reached up to his temples where the beginning of a headache was making its first jabbing prods at his skull. It had been a long day, but he doubted he would have rather just had a normal day instead. It had been a good day overall even despite what happened to Red's friend. He glanced back and saw Hank looking at the floor, still sat outside the other girl's room. He still couldn't work Hank out and even felt threatened by him a little, although he suspected it was because he had become friends with them all rather more suddenly than was usual. He remembered the inobjective rudeness that those two girls at lunch had been subjected to. It had just been obvious that those two were officially "out of the loop" when it came to the circle and because of that, because of their nervousness and the glances exchanged between the other members of Red's circle, they had been as obvious as a sore thumb. Maybe he was being treated like that too, he couldn't really be sure. He'd caught a glance or two like those exchanged at the table, but if they thought that he would just give up on Red they would be surprised and wrong. But he could hardly have been the first, could he? She was no Tiggy, as far as looks were concerned but girls that pretty generally had something seriously wrong with them anyway. But Red was sexy. It was strange but her vocal defectiveness actually attracted him more than he felt repelled or vexed by it. He didn't like hearing her stutter because she didn't like it and tried constantly to prevent it, but it leant her a strange and overwhelming vulnerability. He could smell her as she sat in front of him in the car too. She wasn't using perfume but he'd smelled that apple before too. It was something she used on her hair perhaps. His 3rd person had been reasonably quiet tonight too. Normal that was for the hospital visit anyway. There were those two sightings, but maybe that inner part of him reacted to his desire not to be in such places or was merely curbing the manifestations of itself which passed to him. As he thought about it though, he saw Red's aura and though there was still shades of the yellowish tinges of worry in her, she wasn't particularly worried about her friend. That was odd really, wasn't it? Shouldn't she have been worried about her? Teloni knew little about hospitals or about medicine, but even he knew it wasn't good when people rushed into the room like those doctors and nurses had. She had been worried then, quite a lot. But she wasn't now. It was strange and he wondered how he could ask her what had brought about the change in her. She'd want to know how he could tell then and he'd have to tell her about the shop, about the purple leaves in the sunlight and the burning hot crimson fountain. He hadn't even told his parents the whole of that story... He wasn't even really sure on the details of it himself. In the front, Red took out her phone and he saw her face as it was bathed in the blue light from the screen. She was attractive then, and he could feel an inner part of him stirring. He blinked his eyes quickly, storing the image away, knowing that he would have need of it later.