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CARRY ON WARRIOR WOMAN (C) 2011 by Anthony Durrant I awoke on that fateful day in my room in Thermia after a tough night's sleep and hurried to the window. Through it, I saw signs that my battalion had already marched - their tracks led out of the town. The landlady, Ms. Frieda Hermannsch, came upstairs with my breakfast. "What are you still doing here, Herr Bailiff?" she asked when she saw me looking out the window. "Don't you know your people have left you?" "I guess I must've overslept!" I said. "I saw their tire tracks when I looked out the window. Look, you can see them if you join me here." She came over to the window and handed me my breakfast. Before I could eat it, however, I felt a chloroform pad clamp over my mouth and nose, and soon I collapsed into a blissful unconsciousness. When I awoke, I found myself chained to a support pillar in the basement of the home where I was staying. Frieda Hermannsch was standing in front of me with one of Hynkel's inquisitors by her side. He came up to me and said in Thermian: "We have learned you were a witness to the development of the Splendour Serum and the creation of that American hero, American Splendour, Sergeant Bailiff. Therefore, we intend to wrest from you the secret of that serum." Ms. Hermannsch came up to me and removed a very lifelike mask to reveal her true face, that of a much younger woman. She was Nina Spiers Kreinhilt, one of Hynkel's top agents in the field, and she was known for wringing military information out of people by hook or by crook. Pulling out a pocketwatch, she twirled it in the air in front of me and at the same time grabbed my chin, then spoke in English in a British accent: "You will look into the watch's face as I twirl it," said Nina, "and allow yourself to relax and fall into a deep, deep sleep." The spinning watch had quite an effect on me, and I did indeed begin to feel tired, then slipped into a hypnotic trance within a few minutes. Nina said: "You are in the laboratory developing the Splendour Serum, Sergeant. Tell us what it is." "The Splendour Serum is a virus I modified to house a set of synthetic R.N.A. molecules I designed myself, one that enhances a person's mental and physical attributes to the highest possible human threshold. This virus was kept alive in a potassium solution until I, Dr. Jack Becker, could inoculate a human volunteer with the Splendour Serum. The man chosen was a fellow I'd known for years, a sickly fellow named Doug Coogan who wanted to make a big difference in the world. I'm injecting him with the Splendour Serum now - there, it's done. Look! He's growing! The cells in his body are all multiplying rapidly, making him bigger and stronger than he ever was before. I'll call you AMERICAN SPLENDOUR after my serum, and you will represent the very best America has to offer." "You will awaken and feel refreshed, and you will remember everything you've just told me!" Nina replied. "Thank you for supplying the missing links for our own version of your Splendour Serum." "It was very thoughtful of you to describe the Splendour Serum to us, Dr. Becker!" the Inquisitor said. "It made my job so much easier." Nina then walked over to a table with lab equipment on it and sat down behind it. She then placed her virus into a potassium serum she created right in front of me. Once the virus had been allowed to multiply for about fifteen minutes, Nina drew it out of its containter with a hypodermic and injected the new serum into herself." "That serum was meant for Hynkel's soldiers!" the inquisitor cried. Nina used a bullwhip to grab him by the arm and hurl him directly into the house's electrical panel, damaging the door and shattering the circuit breakers inside. Hundreds of volts of electricity zapped the inquisitor, and the house itself was plunged into a state of darkness. Using my knowledge of escape artistry, I was able to wriggle free of the chains that bound me to the pillar, then make my way upstairs. As soon as I was back in Nina's kitchen, I made myself some tea and oatmeal porridge for breakfast. After breakfast, I went to Nina's garage and pilfered the keys to her car, then unlocked and opened the car door and went in. When I put the ignition key in the keyhole on the neck of the steering wheel, and turned the key in the lock, a weird noise came out of the engine: "Pwa-pwa-pwa-pwa-pwa-PUH-UH-UH!" I turned the key again and heard that noise again: "Pwa-pwa-pwa-pwa-pwa-PUH-UH-UH!" I puzzled on that noise for a few minutes before I realized what the cause was, and pulled the CHOKE lever on the dashboard as I switched the car to "drive" mode, then said: "That duck will never learn!" I drove the car down the driveway with my foot firmly on the gas pedal and was about to turn right onto the street when the car suddenly stopped. Looking out the driver's side window, I saw Nina's face staring back at me. The serum had transformed her into a mighty Amazon at the threshold of physical and mental perfection. Her lips formed the word "no" as she pulled me back, then ran around to the passenger side of the car and got in beside me. "You will take me to the railroad station!" she cried. I turned the car in the direction of the station, and Nina took hold of my arm. *** As we pulled up to the train station, I realized that the train to Hamelyn, the capital of Thermia, had already left the station. Nina saw this too, and shouted: "After that cargo train!" I drove off after a cargo train leaving the station, and as we caught up to it, Nina grabbed me and leaped from the car, then landed right on the floor of a boxcar. She dragged me after her as she kicked a hole in the side of the car and leaped from it onto the locomotive, tearing off its back door in her eagerness to meet Hynkel. When she pulled me into the locomotive, we were both shocked to find the engineer dead. A conductor's mask and uniform lay on the floor along with a note that I picked up. It read: "This cargo train will never get where it was intended to go. - The Wrecker." "The Wrecker!" I cried. "That's impossible! The Wrecker was Charles Gray, an unscrupulous railway company employee who derailed the Hurricane Express. But, he was killed in a fall from the Express's locomotive when he attempted to sabotage it again, in the spring of 1932 - well over 80 years ago, now." "Then, THIS Wrecker must be an impostor!" Nina cried. "We have to inform the High Command of this, his latest attack, but first we must stop the train before it is derailed." The two of us sat down at the locomotive's control console, and I pressed my foot down on the dead man's switch. As soon as the locomotive had stopped, Nina used the engineer's two-way radio to report the incident to the Thermian High Command in her native tongue. "Hynkel has ordered us to proceed to the next station, where he has promised us that a helicopter will be waiting for us!" she said. After I got the locomotive running again, the two of us proceeded to the station house in Kowtow, where we stopped the train and walked into the station. A few minutes after we had entered the building, a helicopter landed right in front of the station on the parking lot, and Nina again grabbed me and hurried into the aircraft with me under her arm. Its pilot then took off and flew directly to Hamelyn. There, as we flew over the city square, I saw the statue of the Pied Piper, the man who'd supposedly saved the children about 800 years ago from an avalanche that buried the town, which reportedly contained a music box that supposedly played the tune the Piper had lured the children from the city with. The pilot landed on the grounds of Hynkel's summer home, and Nina and I climbed down from the helicopter and followed the man into the building. He led us past the sentries and down a corridor into a large office, where the two of us seated ourselves in a pair of chairs, awaiting Hynkel's arrival. Soon enough, a slender man seated himself in the chair behind the desk and spun it around to face us in the darkness and gloom - Hynkel himself, apparently. This was confirmed when the fellow shouted at Mina in Thermian: "Agent Kreinhilt, report!" Nina gave a detailed report on the Splendour Serum based on what she learned from me, and then proudly displayed her enhanced physique. Hynkel threw back his head and laughed evilly. "Do you really not know who I am, Beckmann?" he asked me. "Or does your work for the Allied cause make you forget you are Thermian?" "I DON'T know who you are," I replied, "even though your voice does sound very familiar to me, I cannot place you as yet, Hynkel." In response, Hynkel turned on the lights in his office, and I saw his face for the first time. He was clean-shaven, with no visible beard or moustache, and I was shocked to find myself staring at an exact double of myself! Hynkel must've seen the look on my face, for he smiled and said in a cold, hollow voice: "I am the frail child whose life was saved by your geneticist father through an infusion of your D.N.A. after you fled to America at his request and changed your name from Jehan Beckmann to Jack Becker. The serum Dr. Beckmann used on me transformed me into your clone. I have all of your talent, all of your genius, and I can feel everything you feel, Dr. Beckmann. Because your father saved my life, I will not kill you, but instead see to it that you and Kreinhilt are taken to the Vosterstuchen Camp, located right in the Thermian foothills, which is where all of Thermia's superbeings are safely contained." "Master!" cried Nina. "You WOULDN'T!" "I would indeed, Kreinhilt!" he replied. *** And so the pilot led us to his helicopter after he brought us out of the palace, and forced Nina and I to climb aboard at gunpoint. He then took the helicopter up and flew directly toward the Vosterstuchen Mountains, where the camp was located. On the way, I looked down below me at the ground, and saw a cargo train that had been derailed only a short while ago. "The Wrecker again!" I cried. Much to my surprise, the pilot replied: "Yes, he has been derailing the old heavy cargo trains that go through the country. A master of disguise, the Wrecker assumes the identity of someone on the locomotives, and then murders the engineer and crashes the train itself." Soon, we arrived at the camp itself, perched on the top of the highest mountain, and the pilot set us down on its landing pad and forced us to accompany him onto the camp grounds. There, he presented his I.D. to a guard, who read it and then handed it back to him. The guard then put collars around our necks and led us through a pair of gates into the camp proper. There, we found a group of superhumans either standing or walking around the area. One of them, a tall woman apparently in her 20s, was seated on a rock eating some bread. When she saw me, she ran up to me and shouted: "My God, Jack, is that really you after all these years apart? I can't believe it!" "Look, who ARE you?" I cried. "They call me American Wonder these days, and I go by the name Janice Kellerman!" she replied. "My real name, however, is Harvey Kentwell, a classmate of yours at college." She then related the strange series of events that had caused her consciousness to be transferred to the real Janice Kellerman's body after her death at the hands of a crimelord who turned out to be none other than the scientist who'd endowed her with Janice's body. Just as she was finishing her story, a bearded man in a form-fitting purple uniform who was listening to something on a mini CD player looked up at me and cried: "You! You and your superiors are the ones who're responsible for my even being here! I'll kill each and every last one of you!" He threw himself at me, but was grabbed by American Wonder and a slender man in a black uniform, both of whom held him back with Nina's help. Then he stopped struggling, grinned madly, and sang in an eerie, high- pitched voice: "Who built the Ark? Noah, Noah! Who built the Ark? Father Noah built the Ark. "He sent in the animals two by two, Two by two on my old kazoo. "Yeah, who built the Ark? Noah, Noah? Who built the Ark? Father Noah built the Ark!" Just as the madman finished his song, a big German Shepherd ran up to him, smelled him, and circled around him as if it was waiting for someone. Indeed, a tall man in the uniform of a commandant walked over to it calmly, signalled the guards with him to grab the madman, then had them drag him away, presumably to a solitary confinement area, leaving behind his mini CD player. I picked up the player and put the earphones on, then replayed his CD. A lady's voice said clearly and calmly: "Darling, our daughter Megan wants you to hear something she learned in Kindergarten today." I then heard a little girl's voice singing the same song we'd just heard the madman sing, "Father Noah and his Ark." I was so upset, I turned off the player after only a few minutes. "I'm very sorry his little show had to end!" I said sadly to American Wonder as the commandant patted the dog's head and said: "Good girl, Iron Hans! You must have heard the Purple Crusader singing his little ditty and followed your ears to his location. You'll get a piece of steak for dinner tonight for this!" Then he turned to Nina and I and introduced himself as Commandant Gutterschwein, the officer in charge of the camp. He welcomed the two of us personally and led us to a large building which turned out to be a barracks where several other superhumans were exercising or resting. American Wonder followed us into the building, with the slender man bringing up the rear. I asked him: "Now, who the heck are YOU?" "They call me the Pariah, Dr. Becker!" he said. "You know who I am?" I asked him. "Everyone in Allied Intelligence knows of the scientist who perfected a serum to enhance a soldier into peak physical condition, then had to watch as the coming of the Evolved rendered it obsolete!" he replied. "That must have been why you were chosen as the special agent sent to find and free us." "It was, indeed!" I said. "To attract the attention of Hynkel's spies, I had to be authentic, and the data I gave them authentic as well. Nina was sent here when Hynkel saw her enhanced body and thought she meant to take power from him." At that moment, a guard brought supper; it consisted of a porridge made of mixed grain combined with bone ash for calcium. As we sat around eating our porridge, I said in English: "This is exactly the sort of thing Roman gladiators ate for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Many grains contain a certain chemical that accelerates bone and muscle growth faster than calcium." "You don't think they'll -" a woman gasped. "Teach us to fight each other? Indeed - that is the only reason we're being given this diet!" I said. After we finished our porridge, we laid our heads back on the floor, curled up, and went to sleep. *** I was forceably awakened by the commandant the next morning, and then two of his guards grabbed me and lifted me off the floor. "I have completed the process that will give me a superbeing that can track down other superbeings if and when they escape from this camp!" he told me. "And, my dear Dr. Beckmann, you are going to be the volunteer for the experiment!" He then had his guards bring me over to the camp's laboratory building and take me inside, where I saw a group of scientists seated around the device that Gutterschwein had apparently designed. "It works through a mixture of genetics and optical science!" he explained, as ever in his native tongue. "The basic idea here is to merge the genetics of an animal and person into one being." "That's morphing!" I exclaimed. "And morphing is a last-ditch, one-time- only treatment for those who are fatally wounded or terminally ill!" "Not this time!" Gutterschwein replied. "My process will infuse everything you are into the body of my German Shepherd, Iron Hans." The guards put me, kicking and struggling, into one-half of a large sphere and strapped me down. In the other half sat Iron Hans; her collar was chained to a rod in that half by a leash. She looked at Gutterschwein and tilted her head sideways as if to get one final whiff of his scent before the procedure began. Then, as I struggled to get free, both halves slid together and locked into place. Then, I heard the crackle of electricity from outside the sphere, and a voice began counting up in percentages in Thermian: one of the female scientists was speaking. "Ten percent...twenty...thirty...forty...fifty...sixty...seventy...Commandant, do you really want me to go all the way up to one hundred percent?" "Nothing less will make my invention work, Dr. Bachenstein!" Gutterschwein replied, and she said: "Eighty...ninety...one hundred percent!" I heard the sound of electrical current arcing as some of the lab's relays literally blew out from the strain of containing the massive current needed to keep Gutterschwein's invention running. At the same time, Iron Hans howled for the dead as a bright light enshrouded the two of us. Pain surged through me as the light grew tremendously in intensity, and I blacked out from the strain. I came to later as the two halves of the orb were being pulled apart and discovered I now had a female body covered in long black fur. Bracing myself on the edge of what was now my half of the orb but was once the original Iron Hans's half, I lifted myself out of it and unhooked the leash. "Well done, all of you!" Gutterschwein shouted when he saw me. "Dr. Beckmann, you now have all the powers of a German Shepherd, so from now on you will be - IRON HANS, the huntress who will track down any and all who escape from the Vosterstruchen Camp!" *** After my transformation, I was returned to the barracks, but now I was a full-fledged guard, a position I could use to help my new friends. After taking my post at the barracks door, Nina took one look at me and said: "My God, Jack, can that truly be you?" "I'm not Dr. Jack Becker anymore, Nina, and I doubt I ever will be Dr. Jack Becker again. My new name is Iron Hans, and I will help you get out of here in the very best way I know how. Gutterschwein has informed me that he's set up a gladiatorial contest, which will take place two weeks from now. I'll join you when you train for the contest, and we'll plan our escape together!" *** For the next two weeks, everybody trained hard for the gladiatorial contest, including myself. Twice a day, we did calisthenics on the camp grounds, then jogged around the camp's circumference three times a day. By the time the day for the contest rolled around, all of us were lean and mean and ready for action. The guards herded us into the camp's gymnasium as if we were cattle, and Gutterschwein fired a shot from his pistol into the ceiling to, as he said, "let the games begin." For the first match, the Pariah was pitted against American Wonder. The two of them grappled in the middle of the gym, and the Pariah caught American Wonder in a chokehold, and she slammed her elbow into his chest, causing him to double over. Then she threw him over her head, and he landed on the floor with a thud. When he rose to his feet, American Wonder knocked him down again with a flying kick to the chin. As he fell, his pale skin caught on a rusty nail that tore it open. Under it, I saw the metallic gleam of an artificial skeleton, a complete surprise to me and the others. "He's an android!" I thought to myself. "Either that, or he's a cyborg with a completely prosthetic body. I wonder why he hasn't even tried to fight American Wonder very hard, as he must be easily strong enough to kill her quickly." I ran over to the Pariah and tried to help him get back on his feet, but he pushed me away and said in an angry voice: "Don't - I have the ability to regenerate." He then again rose up on his feet and rushed back toward American Wonder even as his wound began to regenerate from the inside out. The two of them locked in combat, and American Wonder fell on her back on the floor, then hurled the Pariah over her head into the wall using her legs. Before she could turn to attack, the Pariah lifted up his left hand index finger in the ancient surrender signal and the match officially ended then and there. Now Nina and I were herded to the middle of the gymnasium floor, and Gutterschwein gave the nod for the fight to begin in earnest. Nina shoved me to the floor, and I tried in vain to duplicate American Wonder's match-winning move, but her enhanced strength prevented this, and I wasn't skilled enough yet to stop her from pinning me down. "NOW!" I shouted. The other superhumans charged the guards and overcame them one by one. Then, as Gutterschwein called for reinforcements, the two of us led the other superhumans to the garage where the camp's two cars were kept. After knocking out the two sentries posted there, we got into the cars and drove right through the back wall of the garage, shattering it completely, then smashed our way through the camp's back gate. After we'd completed our escape from Vosterstuchen, we drove all the way to the railroad tracks that cut right through the nearby foothills. Once there, I cried: "Pariah, you and the others must head for the nearest train station and change cars there. Don't try to hop a boxcar, or you might run into the Wrecker, a notorious criminal who's derailing trains to prevent them from reaching their destination." The Pariah lifted out of the armoured car's seat through a hatch, then lifted it off the ground and flew right into the air, but in the opposite direction from Nina and I. Nina drove the officers' staff car alongside the train tracks so as to deceive the mad Gutterschwein into following us instead of the Pariah and the others. As we drove up alongside the cargo train that regularly came to the Vosterstruchen area, we heard over the radio that Hynkel was planning to address the people of Thermia for the first time on T.V., apparently to incite them into continuing the war. "He's never spoken publicly before?" I asked. "No," Nina replied, "and that's because of the genetic changes your father inflicted on him. Because he's genetically identical to you now, Hynkel has been living in his home in Hamelyn as a recluse." "WAS genetically identical to me!" I replied. "I am Iron Hans now, remember, Nina?" Once we'd driven up alongside the boxcar, Nina grabbed me and leaped into it, allowing the car to speed along on its own. Unfortunately, someone else was already in the boxcar - a big muscular man who was in the process of disconnecting the train from the locomotive. I asked Nina: "Could this be the Wrecker himself?" "No, he's too big!" Nina replied. "He's probably a thug hired to disconnect the train while the Wrecker derails the locomotive and makes his getaway again." "No," the man said as he turned and covered us with a revolver, "I was hired by the Wrecker to lay a trap for you on the train, because you almost interfered with his plan the first time you chose to hop onto one of these boxcars!" He then grabbed me by the spiked collar that was around my neck and shoved me into one of the crates in the boxcar. After closing the lid of the crate over me and nailing it down tightly using my revolver as a hammer, the man turned to Nina and she leaped on him. I could hear the two of them grappling for the gun, and I felt my fur tingle for what would be the first of many times. There was an odour of disinfectant inside the crate, and my nose detected the smell of some sort of medicine. Feeling my way along in the darkness, my hand brushed up against the bottom of a glass vial or bottle. I grabbed the object, ripped off the seal at the top and pulled off the lid, then guzzled down the bottle's contents. It was as if a nuclear bomb had exploded inside of me: I felt power surge through me and punched my way out of the crate through the top, surprising Nina and shocking the thug, who said: "Aren't you supposed to be dead, Iron Hans?" "I'm alive and kicking, you monster!" I shouted, and then I leaped from the crate and grabbed the thug by the arm. After knocking the gun out of his hand, I twirled him around my head several times before throwing him off the boxcar. "Are you okay?" Nina asked, and I replied: "Never been better. In fact, I feel MAGNIFICENT!" "Then, let's go after the Wrecker!" she cried. "Yeah, let's!" I said, and then the two of us hurried from the boxcar to the locomotive. When we reached the car just behind the locomotive, we found a man in an engineer's uniform, tied up and gagged. When we released him, he cried: "The Wrecker knocked me out and took my place!" "Let's go stop him, then!" I cried. "Yes, and put an end to this madness!" Nina cried. *** We had to pass through the car in which the engineer was lying to reach the locomotive. Sure enough, the exact double of the gentleman in the last car was seated at the train's controls, and he had his foot on the accelerator pedal. "Stop this train, Wrecker!" I cried in Thermian. "We've got you so covered, you can't escape us!" "Oh, no, you haven't!" cried a voice from behind us. "I'VE got YOU covered, you little fools!" And then someone tossed a length of rope right in front of us onto the floor - trick rope. We'd been royally duped by a master. The Wrecker now stepped into the locomotive and held us at gunpoint while he conked the engineer on the head, then picked him up bodily and hurled him from the train! He then took the revolver from Nina and sat down in front of the train's controls himself. Pressing his foot on the accelerator pedal hard, causing the train to go faster, While the Wrecker's attention was diverted, Mina grabbed him from behind and hurled him out of the locomotive. I then sat down behind the engine myself and pressed my foot down hard on the dead man's switch. Unfortunately, it was stuck, and I couldn't operate it this time around, so Nina grabbed me and leaped off the moving train. Amazingly, her injuries healed within minutes, and the two of us ran back along the track to the spot where the Wrecker lay. He was face up, but fatally injured. "Here," Nina said, "let me help you." When she opened the collar of the Wrecker's shirt, she discovered the flaps for a head mask underneath. Pulling the head mask off the Wrecker, she found herself staring into - Hynkel's face! The dictator of Thermia grinned evilly at me and said: "Yes, I am the Wrecker. I have been derailing trains in order to rob them of the valuables contained in the mailing cars. The money I make from selling the stolen valuables is used to fund our country's war machine and has been...ever since the allies destroyed our banking sys...tem..." Hynkel's head fell back on Nina's knee and his eyes gazed toward the skies, unseeing. He was dead, so we buried him in a rock pile along the tracks, then continued walking on foot to Hamelyn. *** We'd already made it to the station house when a staff car pulled up alongside us. "Master," said an officer from within, "we are here to bring you to the station in Hamelyn for your big speech tonight." "Let's go, then!" I said as Mina and I entered the cave and were driven to Hamelyn. There, we left the car and were escorted to a podium in front of a T.V. camera. One of the men asked: "Will your speech be about war, Master - I mean, Mistress?" I turned to the T.V. camera as Nina held the men at gunpoint and said: "No, thank you, I don't want war - rather, I would prefer to be happy and at peace. But that can only happen if we all work together and strive in all of our hearts to insure that war is ended forever and peace becomes a reality, maintained by eternal vigilance. Therefore, I have always dedicated myself to the causes of peace and justice to all humanity, and those of you who are watching this speech should follow my shining example!" THE END