My Wonderful Obsession 19 free porn video

My Wonderful Obsession Part 19: Going a LOT Further I'm not a hundred percent sure how or why, but my most recent visit with the two doctors only seemed to add fuel to a fire that was already burning in me. Before that appointment, I was feeling determined, or maybe a better word would be obsessed, with following my dream of becoming a woman in every possible way, so I could experience all the wonderful things in life that only a real woman could. I knew beyond any doubt that I was head-over-heels in love with my wonderful boyfriend Mark, and that being his girlfriend was the best thing that ever happened to me. I was so certain that he felt the same way, and that we would eventually wed, that I found myself practice-speaking my married name (or rather names) out loud : "Sandy McCowan," "Sandra McCowan" ... and even "Alexandra McCowan." I felt certain that I was fixed for life, and that any worries or problems were now behind me. Talk about over- confidence! Way down deep, however, I remember having this nagging feeling that my troubles hadn't even begun, and that my path to happiness would be a long and rocky one. I knew it was there, even though I did my best to ignore it and tell myself that I deserved instant gratification. Looking back, I wish I'd paid more attention to my gut feelings while they were still bubbling at the surface. But I didn't, and what had transpired at Dr. Westerman's office totally buried any misgivings that were there up till then. The two doctors basically rubber-stamped my ambition to change my sex! It all went so perfectly, I naturally concluded I was destined to have all the things I wanted - after all, I figured, if everything was falling into place so perfectly, it must be exactly what God had in mind for me. So in many ways I think I abandoned my cautious nature and threw myself completely into my new role as a love-struck teenage girl. I saw Mark every second I possibly could, talked with him on the phone for hours when I couldn't be with him, and wrote him long love letters when I couldn't talk with him. I have no idea why he didn't react badly to being smothered with attention like that! But when we were apart I just ached to be near him again, or at least to hear his voice! I even began fantasizing about having sex with Mark whenever I had 'solitary sex' ... I imagined feeling his hands all over my body (especially on my breasts, one of which I would cup with my spare hand, pretending it was his), and I also imagined holding his penis in my hands, giving him pleasure as only I knew how. These fantasies were so erotic that I became quite eager to experience them for real. Little did I know that it wouldn't be long before I did - at least as much as I could without a vagina! My senior year of high school was due to begin in only a couple of weeks, and I'd made up my mind to attend as Sandra, wear whatever I felt my best in, and damn people like Justin Bradford if they couldn't handle it. Sandy Johnson was now a girl and people would just have to suck it up and get used to it. Looking back, it's almost comical to think how naive I was that August - you don't just waltz into school one day wearing a skirt and makeup when the teachers and other students, not to mention the school's records, know you as a male! But, amazingly, that was just one more hurdle that seemed to vanish before I even needed to try jumping it. ***** Mark was at my front door at eight on the twenty-second. Mom was already gone, this time to assist one of her employees with a difficult cleaning job that had to get done before she left for Florida, and Phil was sleeping in as he often did on the weekends. "Hi hon," I greeted my handsome boyfriend, putting my arms around his neck and delivering my first of many kisses of the day. Mark returned the kiss hungrily and wouldn't stop. "Mmm, you taste so good," he said between smooches. "You just haven't eaten anything yet!" I giggled, not wanting him to quit - but remembering the scrambled eggs I had cooking, I tried to pull away. "Why don't I just have you?" he said with one of his captivating smiles, refusing to let me go. 'If Phil wasn't home,' I thought, 'I'd be more than happy to let you have me right here, right now!' The night before, I'd had an especially vivid dream where Mark and I were making passionate love, and I was still enjoying the afterglow! I wanted this guy SO badly! "Come in the kitchen, silly," I giggled, doing my best to calm down and drag him in that direction. "I'm making breakfast just for you, and you won't like it if it's all black." "Okay, but just this once," he relented. "So where's your Mom?" "She's out for the morning, but Phil's home - still in bed I think." It crossed my mind that if we'd been alone, I might have given in to the temptation to take Mark up to my room. THAT was both a scary AND an exciting thought. Instead, I served him scrambled eggs, sausage and toast, and he washed it down with fresh-squeezed orange juice. But it wasn't a bad second choice, I realized - it was the first time I ever cooked just for him! And I thoroughly enjoyed doing that, especially when he praised my cooking skills at least ten times during the meal. Mark helped me tidy up and off we went in his car. Our first stop was the mall, where he wanted to take advantage of a great back-to-school sale and pick up a couple of new pairs of jeans, even though he wasn't going to school that fall. It was great fun giving him my opinion while he modeled the jeans, and I found myself enjoying the view of his well- shaped tush, which of course reminded me of my dream again. I also needed a few more clothing items for the fall, but I'd already made dates to go shopping with Kath and with Natalie as well, in the week following. Our next stop was the McCowan residence, where we arrived a couple of hours before we needed to leave for Megan's big dance recital. We were barely inside the front door when I encountered Mark's Dad. My heart nearly stopped dead! "Alexandra!" he said with a wide smile on his handsome face. "Nice to see you again. Megan told me you were joining us today. She's very happy you're coming - it's awfully good of you to take the time. Mark tells me you're a very busy girl." At first I had trouble speaking, I felt so nervous! "I'm, uh ... not too busy this summer. I thought it'd be fun ..." Not a very good opening line, I thought. Try again! "I really like Megan," I went on, "she's a very sharp girl. I'm sure she's a very good dancer too - and I'm really looking forward to seeing her dance." "Well, I'm no expert like you girls are, but I think she does fairly well. I miss at least half of her shows, but whenever I do make it to one I'm always impressed." "I'm sure I will be too," I agreed. Mark took me past the huge kitchen to their beautiful living room, which was a couple of steps lower and overlooked the backyard patio and pool through floor-to-ceiling windows. "Make yourself comfortable," he suggested. 'It's not easy feeling comfortable around here,' I thought. Maybe it was because I never knew anyone else who had money, or perhaps it was because I wanted so badly to make a good impression on Mark's family - but I definitely had a big problem with nerves, especially around Mr. McCowan. I remembered feeling that way in the receiving line after the play, too. At least on this occasion I felt dressed well enough - the white skirt with sewn-on pockets that ended four inches above my knees, and a fitted sleeveless blue top tucked into it. My hair was brushed out full and the only makeup I had on was a touch of eyeliner and mascara. But all my exposed skin was nicely tanned and that made me feel great all over. Mark was back in a minute with a glass of iced tea for me, which I gratefully accepted. Then his Dad joined us and started to make conversation. "So, Mark tells me you're going into your last year of high school." "Um, yes - I'm really looking forward to graduation. Twelve years in school's plenty for me." "So you aren't going to college afterwards?" "Oh, yes, I want to. But I kind of like what Mark's doing - you know, taking a year off to work. So I might do that, but I'm not going to make up my mind till the New Year." "And what do you think you'll study in college?" "Oh, I'm hoping to do a degree in theater. But I might do a minor in business or something like that." "To pay the bills when you're out on your own?" he laughed. For an instant I recognized Mark in his Dad's sparkling eyes, and my heart skipped a beat. "Uh, I suppose so ... I guess theater doesn't pay too well, does it?" He laughed again, "Maybe for some. I've seen you perform, so I don't doubt that you could do very well, but it never hurts to have a marketable skill to fall back on." That advice make sense to me, and I nodded my agreement. Then Mark joined the conversation. "I'm planning on taking electronics engineering - theater's great, but Dad's right, I don't think I could make a living at it." "Maybe you could try the movies," I said with a wink. "They pay pretty well, don't they?" He laughed, "That'd be just fine with me - but my chances would be better with a lottery ticket!" "Oh, I don't know - you have the look, and you can act ..." "So you think I should head for L.A. and get a job waiting tables, then just sit back and get discovered?" "Sure, isn't that the way it's done?" I was starting to feel more relaxed. "On second thought, maybe you shouldn't go - I'd miss having you around to go hiking with." Mr. McCowan jumped in. "Oh yes, Mark told me you're a good hiker. Not many girls are into that, I'm afraid." "Oh, I love hiking," I replied, more for Mark's benefit than his Dad's. "I do a lot of walking and running, so I guess hiking's right up my alley." "You should see her on the trail, Dad," smiled Mark. "I can barely keep up ..." "Now don't start THAT again," I laughed. "Do you ski as well?" Mr. McCowan asked with a smile, obviously enjoying the exchange. "Uh, no ... I never have. It looks fun, though." "Well, you should come with us this winter - we take a family ski vacation every year. We'd love to have you along. You seem pretty athletic, so I'm sure you'd pick up skiing real fast." 'Now it's Mark's DAD who's encouraging our relationship,' I thought. "Um, thank you, that's a very nice offer - but I'm really not athletic at all. That would be my brother Phil - he can do anything physical ... I'm really only good at things that aren't too competitive." "Skiing's not competitive at all," Mark pointed out. "You do your own thing, there's no team stuff or anything like that ..." "Yeah, but I'd still be worried about holding other people up ... and I'd probably look silly trying to learn it in the first place - you know, falling on my butt, crashing into other people ..." "Oh, I'm sure you'd be a fast learner, Alexandra," Mark's Dad assured me. "And they have amazing ski technology these days - I'll bet you'd be skiing blue runs your very first day!" "Blue's intermediate, and green's for novices," Mark explained before I had the chance to ask. "Mom likes the greens best, but Megan and Marci only do the blues." "And what about the men of the family?" I asked, kind of dreading the answer. They smiled at each other and Mark replied, "Uh, we usually hang out on the black runs - they're kind of more advanced - but we ski blues a lot too." "Well, I guess I could ski with your Mom ..." Mr. McCowan chuckled, "Oh, I'm sure she'd love that. Come to think of it, that IS a great idea. Mom usually has to ride the chairs with strangers, so having you along would solve that problem." "Until she graduated to blue runs, Dad," Mark pointed out. "THAT might take a few years," I laughed. "My friend Julia tried skiing a few times and she never got the hang of it, so I don't think I should expect miracles, either." "But SHE never had the right instructor," smiled Mark. "I'd be there to look after you, I promise." "Just not on the black runs, right?" "Right," said Mark's Dad. "But it sounds as though you've decided you'll come with us, correct?" "Uh, I'd love to ... you're very generous, but I'd still need to know when, where - that kind of thing, and I'd have to okay it with my Mom. And I don't own any gear at all, like no ski clothes ..." He smiled and shook his head. "Don't worry about equipment, we have lots, and what we don't have, we can rent. This year we're going to Vermont, over the Christmas break." "Dad has a business friend who's letting us use his condo at Killington," Mark added. "How many does it sleep, Dad?" "It's got four bedrooms, so there'll be plenty of space. Alexandra could have her own room or she could share with Megan," he suggested. That last concept sounded problematic to me. Just then I felt two hands on my bare shoulders, so I spun around to see who it was. "Oh, hi Mrs. McCowan. How are you?" "I'm fine, thank you, Alexandra," she replied in a warm friendly voice. "I'm sorry, I wasn't ignoring you, I had to help Megan get ready. Would you care to join us for a bite of lunch?" "Oh, I hadn't planned to ..." I glanced at Mark, who simply nodded at me. "Uh, thank you - that would be ... I mean, I'd like that very much." "Wonderful," she said. "Well, everything's ready, so if you'd all like to come to the table ..." I followed her back to the kitchen and she directed me to a round table with five chairs, near a side bay window. It was already set and I chose a seat by the window, in the sun. Mrs. McCowan retrieved a tray of quartered sandwiches and a bowl of green salad from the fridge and Megan joined the group as the rest sat down. "Hi Megan, are you excited?" I asked the girl, who sported dramatic eye makeup and had her hair pulled into a tight bun at the back of her head. "Hi Megan, are you excited?" I asked the girl, who sported dramatic eye makeup and had her hair pulled into a tight bun at the back of her head. "Hi Sandy," she replied, giving me a big smile. "Yeah, I'm really looking forward to being on stage today." "I know what you mean - I love being on stage too. I can't get enough of it!" "Megan, did you know that Alexandra performed with Mark in Fiddler on the Roof?" asked her father. "I know. But the other girl was playing that part when Mom and I went." "It's too bad you didn't the chance to hear her sing. She's amazing." "I thought you were just a dancer," Megan said to me as she took a sandwich from the tray. "Oh, she has all kinds of talents, Megan," her Mom smiled. "Just like you!" I knew that Megan didn't have ALL the 'talents' I had, nor did she need them, luckily for her. But once again, I felt a twinge of jealousy that Mark's little sister got to be everything I now wished I could have been, especially in the genetics department. The thought momentarily reminded me that, sitting at this table with Mark's family, I was living a very big lie - one that might eventually be exposed, and would have to be if I got my wish to stay with Mark. Thankfully I was able to suppress these negative thoughts and just enjoy the rest of the day - the nice family luncheon, and particularly Megan's very entertaining dance recital, which was held at a theater downtown. She was in two numbers - a tap dance piece and a classical ballet piece, both of which I enjoyed immensely. Her Mom was backstage for quite a while helping Megan and several other girls with costume changes, and she even invited me to join her there if I felt like it, but Mark had put his arm around me and said he had first dibs that day. Thank you Mark! We had long-stemmed roses for Megan when she was all finished, and I got to give them to her. "Megan, you were fantastic!" I gushed when she emerged into the foyer from the dressing rooms. "I absolutely loved your performances, especially the tap number. How can you DO that?" She shrugged, "Oh, you get used to it. You have to concentrate a lot, but it's fun to do. You should take tap classes too, Sandy." "That would be very cool," I agreed. ***** Phil, Natalie and I drove Mom to the airport early the next morning. As was typical whenever Mom had to fly somewhere, she was a bundle of nerves. But this time it was even worse due to the extra stress of having to see relatives she'd never met. The rest of us tried to joke with her about the trip to take her mind off what she was about to do, such as, "Once they get a look at you, they won't let you come home" (from Natalie), or "Let me know if I have any rich uncles" (from me). I half expected Phil to say something along that line but a bit more crass, like "Bring home lots of money", but he didn't - his fianc?e really WAS turning him into a normal human! As I was hugging Mom goodbye at the curb, she said, "Now you be good while I'm gone." Then she looked me in the eye. "No parties at our house, okay?" "No parties, I promise. The house will look even better than it does now." "Good," she said as she gave Phil and Natalie nervous hugs. "See you all in a few days!" "Good luck with the relatives, Mom - you might need it," called Phil as she walked through the revolving door. During the drive back home, Phil had the car stereo on and Natalie was turned to face me, talking to me about how my summer was going. "I hear you've been dating someone named Mark," she whispered. I nodded instead of answering in case Phil could overhear. "It's Mark McCowan from the school play." Natalie's eyes lit up in recognition of the name. "Oh, you mean the guy who played Perchik? He looks like a good catch!" "He IS," I smiled. "We've been doing some hikes together this summer, and we've gone out to dinner, movies, you know ..." "Sounds serious," she smiled. "I'd like to meet him again sometime." "If you're around this afternoon, he's coming over to the house. We're going to hang out and watch TV, or maybe go for a walk somewhere ..." "Phil and I are going out with some friends to a movie after dinner. But maybe we could all eat together - why don't we barbecue some steaks and we can visit in your backyard?" "That sounds like a good plan," I agreed, even though I was nervous about having my boyfriend and my brother - the two men I was closest to - in the same place at the same time. ***** I spent a good part of the day getting caught up on laundry and making sure my bedroom and bathroom were all clean and tidy, just in case. Then I got cleaned up myself and put on my white capris with a pink tank-top - perfect for hanging out in the backyard on a warm day. The doorbell rang as I was spritzing some fragrance on. There at my front door was a very handsome young man - Mark was wearing a bright yellow golf shirt tucked into a pair of sand-colored cotton slacks, and his trademark leather sandals. I greeted him with a hug and a kiss, but then he wouldn't stop kissing me - I had to kick the door shut in case any neighbors were watching. We kept kissing for at least another five minutes and when we finally came up for air, I exclaimed "Wow - what was all that about?" "I missed you," he said simply. "It's been ages, you know ..." "AGES?" I giggled. "It's been exactly ONE day, you nut." "You sure? It seemed a lot longer than that to me." I shook my head, grinning at how everything he said to me felt like a compliment. "Leave your shoes on and c'mon out back. Phil and Natalie are out buying some stuff for the barbecue. Can I get you something to drink?" "Just a soda if you have one, thanks." I directed Mark to the padded chairs on our back deck and went to get a soda can out of the fridge. I filled up a tall glass with ice and poured in the contents of the can, added a straw, then headed outside where Mark was relaxing on one of the deck chairs. "Here you are, sir - your favorite drink." He took a sip and exclaimed "Sierra Mist! How did you know it's my favorite?" I put one hand on my hip and replied, "Mark, really - you should know by now, you can't keep important secrets like that from me." He just laughed, and to my surprise he reached an arm out around my hips, pulling me down onto his lap. I responded by wrapping my arms around his neck and we resumed our kissing session. This time our hands were in each other's hair and Mark began kissing my cheeks and neck. "You smell so good!" he breathed. "I love being this close to you." "I love being close to you too," I answered just before he locked his lips back onto mine. I must admit, kissing Mark was SUCH a huge thrill. I loved the taste of his mouth, and the smell of his skin. It was a lot like the excitement I felt being close to Julia, but different because this was a male I was kissing, not a female. What WAS very different is the way Julia made me feel more masculine, but Mark definitely made me feel completely feminine, and at this point in my life there was nothing better that that feeling! I could tell that Mark was enjoying himself too - there was no mistaking that firm bump I was sitting on. I took it as a huge compliment that a guy like Mark could get an erection over me - it meant that he found me not just physically attractive as a girl but sexually attractive too. It was like the ultimate test of how well I passed as a female. Our passionate little interlude was interrupted when we heard the front door open, and I jumped up to go and see if Phil and Natalie needed help, fixing my hair a bit on the way. But Natalie must have known what was going on, judging by how her eyebrows tilted when she saw my face. "Remember," she said, "you promised your Mom no partying." I quickly checked myself in the hall mirror and noticed that my lipstick was smeared all over. "Oops!" I said as I grabbed a kleenex. "Uh, we weren't exactly partying ..." "You must have been having some fun, though," she laughed. "I figured that was Mark's car in the driveway, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised." They'd already brought everything in, so I asked Natalie what she wanted me to do. "You could help me make the salads," she suggested. "Phil's going to do the barbecuing, but it's still early so no rush. But first I want to meet your friend!" So we both went out back and found the two guys already chatting up a storm. Natalie introduced herself to Mark before I could say anything, and they shook hands. "I see you two already met each other," I said to Phil, still feeling a little uneasy. "Oh, I met Mark at the play," said Phil. "Yeah, we go back a long way, your brother and me," said Mark. "At least a couple of months." "Well, then we'll leave you to reminisce about the old days - Natalie and I need to get to work. Do you need a top-up?" I asked Mark. "No thanks, I'm good," he replied, glancing at his still-full glass with all the ice long since melted away. "But I could use a beer, if you're doing the fetching, Sis," Phil said with a hopeful look on his face. 'He called me 'Sis' again,' I thought. 'He can have anything he wants - even though he's not old enough yet!' "Would you like it in a glass, sir?" I asked in my best servant-girl voice. "Is there any other way?" Phil chuckled. I was back a minute later with a frosty glass of Phil's favorite, Pabst Blue Ribbon. The head of foam was spilling down the side. "You make a great barmaid," said Phil, winking at me as he took a sip. "Yum!" "Watch it, dear brother, or you won't be drinking that beer - you'll be wearing it!" The two guys had a good chuckle and they returned to their conversation as I went back in to help my 'big sister' Natalie. She already had the potatoes boiling so I started cutting and dicing veggies. It was the first time I'd worked with her preparing food, and I really enjoyed the experience. We just chatted our way through all the work and before I knew it we had a potato salad and broccoli salad all set to go. "Let's just stick them in the fridge to cool for a while, then we can join the boys," Natalie suggested. We got ourselves some drinks and went outside, where we found Phil and Mark having a good laugh about who-knows-what. "You guys seem to be getting along just fine without us," Natalie said as we sat down. "How are your drinks?" I asked. Both glasses were empty, so it was a rhetorical question. "We thought you'd never ask!" Phil chuckled, winking at me. "But I suppose we need to go get them ourselves ..." "You've got THAT right, buster," Natalie said with finality. I would have happily gone to get the guys more drinks, but that was just me and my 'servant' mentality. At least Natalie would never let herself be a doormat. The two of them went inside while the two of us took a break. It was gorgeous outside - no wind, no bugs, and a very comfortable eighty degrees. When they came back we all started chit-chatting about whatever. Phil had been talking to Mark about his Dad's company and what kind of work Mark was doing there, and they resumed their conversation while we girls listened in. I hadn't realized how much of a 'tech-head' Mark really was. He was able to do cool stuff with electronics, like designing and testing circuit boards. I began to feel like I'd have a lot of trouble measuring up to his abilities, at least in the area of technology - oh yes, and skiing too. Mark also talked about what kind of products their company made. I knew only a little from before, but Phil was asking a lot more specific questions than I could, and Mark was giving him some pretty detailed answers. I found out that they made several different kinds of medical testing and analysis equipment, mostly used in sports medicine and physiotherapy. No wonder Phil was interested! Natalie was able to ask Mark some intelligent questions as well, but not me - like I said, I didn't have much of a clue about technology. Soon it was time to start the barbecue, and Phil did his usual pro job on the steaks. We ate out on the back deck, totally enjoying the food, the beautiful weather, and the company. Mark and Phil both commented on how great the salads were, and Natalie and I just high-fived each other. With help from the guys, we had everything cleaned up by six. ***** How convenient of Phil and Natalie to leave Mark and me alone at the house while they went off to join their friends for the movie. Recalling Mom's instructions about partying, and Natalie's reminder, I thought that maybe we should play it safe and watch a movie too - so I plugged in one of our videos and we settled in on the couch to watch. But I don't have the foggiest recollection of what it was, because Mark and I started back into our heavy-duty necking almost as soon as the opening credits started to roll. Only this time it went a LOT further ... What can I say? It was the most amazing evening ever! We must have been on the couch for at least half an hour, and by the time we finally got up we'd both been lying down with our bodies pressed tightly together. Mark's hands had been everywhere on my body (except my crotch, which thankfully he avoided), although he hadn't put them under my clothing - yet! I had also let my hands do some wandering, mostly on his back and neck but on his firm tush too. His penis was so hard - I almost put my hand there a few times but managed to resist. It was me who finally broke it off - "Mark ... I have to go to the bathroom!" I panted. He nodded silently and gave me one more passionate kiss, then he helped me up. I was going to just use the guest bathroom on the main level, but when I saw how much Mark was bulging at the front, I made a fateful decision and took his hand in mine. "Come with me," I breathed in my sexiest female voice. I led him upstairs into my room and closed the door. "Wait right here," I said as I ducked into my bathroom. While I was undoing everything so I could relieve myself, I wondered idly what Mark would be thinking of my bedroom. It was now decorated like a typical girly teenager's room, with lots of feminine accents and absolutely no boyish stuff anywhere in sight. I even had some loose potpourri set out in a dish for a nice fragrance. Mark was sitting on the end of my bed when I turned off the light and came back out. I know - you're wondering why I didn't 'slip into something more comfortable,' and maybe he wondered too. But I just wanted to pick up where we left off and see where it took us. A moment later, we were on my bed kissing and groping each other again. I was beginning to wonder if things would get more serious than that, when I felt Mark's hand slip under the top of my capri pants and slide down until he had one of my butt cheeks in his hand. My pulse must have doubled! I responded by sliding a hand under his golf shirt and up onto his back. But I really wanted to put my hands on his chest and run my fingers through his fur, so I began pulling his shirt up until his chest was exposed. Mark obliged by using his free hand to remove it completely, and I immediately buried my face in his furry chest hair. I'd wanted to do that ever since I'd played with it at the pool! "No fair - you still have YOUR top on," he whispered into my ear. "So what are you going to do about it?" I breathed in reply - and he answered by pulling my tank-top up and over my bra. At that moment I was glad I'd worn my pink lace-trimmed bra - even though the only light was what filtered through the curtains, I hoped he'd appreciate it as much as I did. I also had the matching panties on, and knew at that moment that he would soon be seeing them too. It didn't take long - he tried to slip both hands over my ass but the capris were too snug, so he solved the problem by undoing the front button and zipper. Oh my God - it was SO exciting to have both his warm hands there, pulling me tightly against his big bulge! "Your skin is SO soft and smooth, Sandra - soft as a baby's bottom - you're SO round and SO curvy," he said, in a way that left no doubt in my mind that he loved the feel of my body. I loved the way he felt it, and I wanted to feel more of his, too! Then I really stuck my neck out - so to speak. I pulled back from him a little and let one of my hands start to caress his chest, moving ever closer to his stomach. I could tell he liked what I was doing, because he moved his body a little to make it more convenient for me. My fingertips soon touched the top of his pants, but I kept going and let them slip inside. Mark's body tensed in anticipation - and then a pink fingernail brushed the tip of his penis. He let out a low moan, and I knew what he was feeling - I'd been in a similar situation with Julia only the year before. 'This is so cool,' I thought, 'I know exactly what this guy wants me to do - I don't even have to ask him'. So I let my hand slide slowly down, farther into Mark's pants and along the shaft of his VERY hard penis, and then I closed my grip fully around him. Now he was gasping! For a moment I thought he might explode right then and there, but I didn't want him to - yet. So I let go and wriggled out of his grasp, and, kneeling on the bed pulled my capris down so I could kick them off. Then I undid Mark's pants and helped him to pull them off, undershorts and all, until I had a totally naked guy on my bed, lying face up with his head on my pillow, and that unbelievably erect penis standing upright and stiff like a flagpole! Now I positioned myself over Mark, straddling his upper thighs with his penis close to my tummy, just like Julia had done with me, and took hold of him once again. His body arched spontaneously when I closed my hand around him, and I was so worried he'd explode that I pinched the base of his shaft with my other hand to stop it from happening, like I sometimes did with myself. His hands went immediately to my hips and it felt like he was trying to hold on for dear life. Then I began softly caressing his tip, which unlike mine was circumcised, increasing the friction slowly until once again my hand was fully closed around him. Mark's face looked almost like it was in severe pain. "Are you okay, lover boy?" I asked softly. "Not really, lover girl - I'm going to die ... if you don't keep doing that ..." "Then I will - I need you to stay alive ... so you can love me forever." 'Did I really say that?' I thought. 'Whatever ... this poor guy - he really needs me to finish him off ...' So I moved my left hand from Mark's penis to a spot just above there on his pubic bone that I knew from my own experience would make him squirm, and my right hand began moving up and down slowly on the shaft. Mark's breathing immediately sped up, so I tightened my grip and began pumping faster and faster. It only took a few seconds to get the result I fully expected! Mark's mouth, which had been clenched tight in a grimace, suddenly opened wide in a long, muted yell and I felt his penis pulsate wildly ... then my tummy and hands were instantly coated with his wonderful, warm, sticky liquid. I couldn't believe how much I enjoyed the feeling of Mark ejaculating all over me - I absolutely, totally loved it! I loved the feel of it, the smell of it (the taste would come later), but mostly how incredibly, totally female I felt sitting there on top of him, wearing my most feminine underthings and holding his manhood in my manicured hands. 'I LOVE BEING A GIRL!!!' screamed my inner self. Still holding him in one hand, I let myself lay down on top of him and began kissing his chin, his cheeks, his nose, and finally his mouth. "If you keep doing that, I WILL love you forever," Mark said softly. "That was unbelievable ..." "Just stay here, darling," I told him, getting up to go to the bathroom, "I'll be right back." I quickly grabbed a washcloth and dampened it with warm water. First I wiped myself off a bit, then I rinsed out the cloth and used it to carefully clean up my man. "I'm going to go get changed," I said. "Please don't get up - just relax, stay right where you are." "Don't worry ... I can't move a muscle ..." Back in the bathroom, I closed the door and stripped off my damp underwear, then spent a few minutes cleaning myself and fixing up my hair and makeup. I'd forgotten to grab fresh undies, so I put on a robe that I usually left hanging in the bathroom and came back out to find what I needed, noticing that Mark's eyes were closed. But while I was digging through a dresser drawer a pair of furry arms encircled me from behind. "I thought you were napping," I giggled nervously, as I looked for a certain set of matching underwear. "Not with you in the same room," he replied. Then I felt his arms move up to my shoulders, and before I knew it Mark had pulled my robe down to expose my upper back, and he started kissing my shoulders, then held my hair out of the way so he could kiss the back of my neck. Tingles began washing all over me. "Hey, no fair," I moaned, "I'm very sensitive there ..." But Mark just made a "hmm" sound and kept kissing me ... my arms involuntarily went up and I began running my fingers through his hair, totally enjoying all the waves of tingles he was sending down my spine. Then I felt his hands shift position and before I knew it they had untied the robe, and his hands were on my stomach, making circular caresses. The tingles got more intense as his hands went to my sides, stroking the inside curve of my waist, and then his hands slid upwards and right onto my breasts! I felt a huge explosion of tingles all over every inch of me, almost like an orgasm - my knees got weak and I'm sure I would have crumpled to the floor if his arms weren't wrapped around me, holding me snugly with both hands completely covering my little boobs. "Oh Mark ... Mark, that feels SO wonderful ..." was all I could say. It was such a delicious moment, and once again he had made me feel like a beautiful, sexy girl. He was now kissing my ear and he whispered, "You made me feel wonderful too." I was wondering if Mark would try to take my robe completely off, but it didn't happen. 'Maybe he knows I'm self-conscious about him seeing my crotch,' I thought. I still had the 'thong' in place, so as along as he didn't try to give me a close examination ... I let the robe slip to the floor and turned to embrace him, our lips meeting again in the most passionate kiss I had ever experienced or could have imagined. He was totally erect again and I found myself wanting SO badly to feel him inside me - why, oh why couldn't I be a real female right now?? I'd have my own vagina soon, I promised myself on the spot! Mark's hands were caressing me all over as we kissed, from my shoulders down to my ass, and back up my curvy sides brushing against my flattened boobs along the way. "You are SO silky-smooth - I just love the feel of your skin," Mark breathed between kisses. "And I love your caresses," I breathed back. My arms were still around his neck, giving him free access to my body from the neck down, and he took full advantage! Soon we were back on my bed, arms and legs wrapped around each other and necking up a storm. I don't have any idea how long we were there, but at some point I couldn't resist touching his penis again, and judging by the jolt that seemed to go through his body when my hand closed around him, I knew he must be ready for more action. I moved a little so I was lying alongside him, his head close to my boobs, and began pumping him once more. Mark's mouth found one of my nipples at that moment and he started kissing and sucking on it, driving me half crazy - I could feel my own penis straining very uncomfortably in the gaff, but I kept trying to focus on my little 'hand-job' and as I felt Mark arch his back, I was quickly rewarded with another big explosion. 'Wow,' I thought, 'this guy's incredible! I can't get that vagina fast enough - I'm going to have SUCH a good time with it!' Mark buried his face in the soft skin between my breasts and just moaned as I kissed his forehead. I don't think I was ever as proud of any of my accomplishments as I was at that moment - not even my singing! I knew that I could be a beautiful, sexy girl to this man, and that he was VERY attracted to me. THAT was more than obvious! We laid there for a long time, cooling off and letting our heartbeats slow down. I hadn't let go of his penis, and for the first time it became quite limp in my hand. "You're so tiny now," I kidded him softly. "Just wait," he said wearily, "I'm sure that won't last long with you around." "Maybe we should get back to our movie," I suggested, a little reluctantly. "The others could come back any minute." Mark nodded his agreement, and he started to get up. "Not yet, silly," I giggled, "we can't have you dripping all over the rug." So I grabbed a few Kleenexes and mopped him up a bit, then led him to my bathroom and directed him to step into the shower. I clipped my hair up while he was rinsing off and when he was done I took my turn. Mark was holding a towel open for me as I stepped out. "Thank you, kind sir," I said, looking him in the eye as I wrapped it around my body, and giving him my best dazzling smile. I was rewarded with the same in return, and a quick peck on the lips. "My pleasure, honey bunch." "Oh, so now I'm 'honey bunch,' am I? Aren't we getting familiar, like an old married couple!" "Well, I'd say we just got VERY familiar with each other. So now I get to call you 'honey bunch' - if it's all right with you, that is." I giggled and replied, "I guess so, but now I have to come up with a cutesy name for you too." "I can hardly wait," he said with a chuckle. We both got dressed and I put on the same clothes I was wearing before, so Phil and Natalie wouldn't be suspicious when they got home, and we went back downstairs. "We'd better start the movie over again," I suggested. "How about some popcorn?" Mark nodded and began rewinding the video while I went to the kitchen to make our snack. A few minutes later we were snuggled up back on the couch where it all started, munching popcorn and sipping Sierra Mist. This time I leaned my head on his shoulder and held his hand, and that's what the scene looked like when my brother and future sister-in-law came home a half-hour later. If Phil felt awkward seeing me like that with another guy, he didn't show it. The two of them just parked themselves on the easy chairs and watched along with us. But who knows how he would have if he'd seen us an hour before! The movie ended just after eleven, and Mark immediately got up and said he had to get home to bed, because he had to be at work early the next day. I walked him to his car, thinking there might be something wrong and wanting to ask him about it. "Sandra, I ... I feel kind of bad about tonight. I didn't mean for all that to happen. It just ..." "Shh," I said, putting a finger to his mouth. "Don't worry about it - I don't think I got pregnant." Mark smiled a bit, then shook his head. "I'm just worried you're going to think I'm some kind of sex maniac or a pervert or something ..." It was my turn to shake my head. "Mark! If you are then I am too. I think I know what you mean - but we both wanted to do it. Anyway, it's done. And I don't have any regrets. I'd do it all again in a minute." "You sure?" "Yes I'm sure." I took both of his hands in mine and looked into his eyes. "I think you're the nicest guy I ever met. I love you so much ... and I love doing things with you. I hope you won't stress about what happened tonight." Mark looked at me for a while with those wonderful blue eyes of his, and we kissed once more. "I love you too, Sandra," he said softly. "You're amazing," And with that he got into his car, started the engine and waved goodbye. Our relationship had now turned a corner and become sexual, was the thought that went through my mind as I watched Mark drive away. And I couldn't have been happier about it. I know, I was only seventeen years old, but like I said before, I was now obsessed with being able to experience everything about being female ... and I mean EVERYTHING. Besides, I told myself, if I was going to take it to the next level by starting on hormones, I needed to know whether life as a woman was really for me, and that night had given me my answer - in spades! ***** The letter from Dr. Cooper's office arrived in the mail the next day. It was addressed to Mom, but I couldn't wait for her to get home from Florida two days later so I opened it and scanned the cost estimates the doctor had prepared. There were several options for hormone treatments, and to my dismay they all cost more than I hoped they would. I'd still be able to pay for them myself, but I'd have to cut way down on my clothing budget or I wouldn't be saving anything anymore. That was a concern for me, since one of Mom's conditions had been that I save at least ten percent of my income, and so far the figure had been closer to twenty percent. I began to think about how I could earn extra money, but I was so determined by then to get on hormones that I would have happily drained my savings account to do it. And the best part was, if I wanted to I could start my treatments the very next week! I had another date with Mark that evening. We went out for a casual dinner and a long walk, which had become my favorite kind of date with him because I got to hold his hand for long stretches of time and just talk about us. But one subject I never discussed with him was my use of birth control pills, let alone my upcoming female hormone treatments. And, oddly, he never asked what it was that would make a young male - me - grow to look, talk and act just like a young female. At the time I didn't give it a second thought, but in retrospect I should have at least wondered. I did finally work up the courage to ask him when he thought we should tell his parents about the 'real me,' but he just shook his head and said the time wasn't right, but he'd let me know when he felt it was. That wasn't a particularly satisfying answer for me, because I felt that it left me kind of hanging in limbo, but on the other hand I couldn't think of a better way out of this dilemma, so I ended up dropping the subject. To be continued ....