DRABBLES- A Baker's Dozen free porn video

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////////////////////////////////////////////////////// DRABBLES: A BAKER'S DOZEN Laika Pupkino ////////////////////////////////////////////////////// #1 ////////// GHOST DICK Three months after her SRS, Michelle awoke before dawn to see a glowing apparition above the foot of her bed.. It was a dick.... A GHOST dick! It spoke in that warbling voice all ghosts use: "Mi-i-ichael! I'm the ghost of your maaanhooood! Yoooooou muuuuuuuuurdered meeeeeeeee!" A well-aimed book hit the florescent dildo, snapping the string it hung from "I know you're down there, Phyllis!" A woman in pajamas stood up Michelle sighed, "Oh Honey..... I know you hated my transitioning, and don't understand that I HAD to. But can't we discuss this in the morning? Like grown-ups? PLEASE?!" ///////////////////// //////////////////// #2 ////////// MY SHAMEFUL SECRET I took the plunge today and wore it. Under my clothes. Slid it on in the bathroom, where Janet wouldn't see Driving across town to work was a delicious thrill. Nobody could tell about my secret In the breakroom Bev and Miriam---who always acted like they found me somewhat creepy---were chatting me up. Like my secret helped me connect with them. Just us girls The boss walked by. I should've known. He has a nose for these things He recoiled, "Good God, Hendricksen! Are you wearing WOMEN'S deodorant?!" My fetish is expanding. Now I have a pink slip.. #3 ////////// A CHILD'S LETTER TO SANTA DEAR SANTA CLAUSE, I KNOW YOU ARE A MILLION YEARS OLD AND HAVE TO GO ALL OVER THE WORLD IN ONE NIGHT TO GIVE EVERYBODY PRESENTS. AND I KNOW SOMETIMES OLD PEOPLE DON'T HEAR GOOD, LIKE MY GRANMA WHO HAS A HERRING AID, AND MAYBE YOU ARE WORRIED ABOUT YOUR HOUSE WITH THE POLER ICE MELTING AND EVERYTHING BUT I REALLY WISH YOU LISTNED BETTER WHEN I SAT ON YOUR LAP AT MACIES AND TOLD YOU WHAT I WANTED FOR CHRISTMAS I SAID I WANTED A COCKATOO! NOT A COCK OR TWO! SINCERLY, MARCIA GREENBLATT (THE GIRL WITH TWO DICKS) /////////////////////// ////////////////////// #4 ////////// THE DEADPAN DETECTIVES IN: THE CASE OF THE CATALEPTIC KATOYS The fiend was taken away in handcuffs, ranting. A doctor was called in "Will they be okay, Doc?" "Hard to tell. Toxicology isn't my specialty. Why would somebody do this? Takes all kinds, I guess." Friday glared at him. "No it doesn't. Not this kind..." The abandoned furniture store was a ghastly spectacle. Apparently the Thai transsexuals were lured to America with promises of employment. They'd been put in strange positions and paralyzed with curare to form chairs, sofas, ottomans. A hundred eyeballs stared in helpless terror "Well now I've seen everything." "What's that, Joe?" "A Lady Boy Furniture Showroom..." ///////////////////// ///////////////////// #5 ////////// THE LIMITS OF ACCEPTANCE "Mom? I have something to tell you..." "Goodness, this sounds serious. Let's sit down here. What is it, Honey?" "I'm...... I'm a Tr-" "You're Transgender? I knew dear. I was pretty sure anyway. You've always seemed more like a daughter. Your father and I were expecting this. We love you no matter what." "Ohhhh that's wonderful, Mom! I was working up the nerve to tell you someday." "But you just told me..." "That's not what I was gonna say though. It's...... something else." "You can say it. My brave girl!" "I'm...... a Trekkie." "Oh God!! Where did we go WRONG?!!" ///////////////////// //////////////////// #6 ////////// GOOD NEWS/BAD NEWS (for Julie O.) GOOD NEWS: You meet this Adonis at a bar BAD NEWS: He's from Romania GOOD: He speaks English perfectly BAD: He brags incessantly GOOD: You want him anyway BAD: You're not technically a woman yet GOOD: He says he has a thing for T-girls BAD: In the parking garage, the "thing" turns out to be a crowbar! He has restraints, surgical equipment GOOD: You're a witch, working for the Magical Justice Department You've been on this monster's trail for months. You easily subdue him BAD: Before his trial, he's extradited back to Bucharest GOOD: Romanian witch-justice is swift, and..... creative ////////////////////// ///////////////////// #7 ////////// SOMETHING QUITE ATROCIOUS.. My sister Shauntisha was incredulous, "You're sayin' Kelly, our building superintendant, wasn't always a guy?" "He was always a guy, he just be in th' wrong body." "Oh God, there you go with that shit again. You know what I'm sayin'. It's just.... I mean.... Kelly! Who woulda guessed?! And does he have a..... you know." "Penis? Sure does. It's not fully functional, but it look REAL, man!" "How on Earth did they do that?" "Made it from his toes." "His TOES????" I sang my response, "Our..... super Kelly's fake realistic sex be all his toes, Sis!" ///////////////////// //////////////////// #8 ////////// THE MiSTERY WoMAN oF MYStARY (My attempt at penning the worst transender fiction ever written:) He said this elivater will took me to top of Eifful Tower and I say form here in Miniapellis?? Really??? and "Yes" he said so I did I took it and get out. He was there I dont now how he got here? I say this IS high up but not Effel TOWER high And he says no not Eiffal. It's names the "I Fall" tower Why? I ask? They say look over the egde and you'll see so I did and he push me Then I knew why as.. ,I ,F .A ,L ,L ,! .! .! Oh. And I was a man waring a dress //////////////////// /////////////////// #9 ////////// GENDER-FLUID I'd never heard the term "gender-fluid" until that day "So, what's the problem..... Mister..... Miss-" "You can't tell, can you Doctor?" "No." "That's the problem. Neither can I." "But which sex do you feel like?" "I don't." "A-HA!!" he exclaimed. Dug into my navel. Out popped a valve stem "JEE-SUS!!!" "Relax, everybody has one. But it should have a cap on it. Your genderfluid's leaked out." "My what?" "Lie back..." He put a funnel into the stem. Took what resembled a gallon of cheap blueberry punch from a cabinet "Um..... could I try that pink kind there?" ////////////////////// ///////////////////// #10 //////// THE QUEEROMETER NEVER LIES (Just a gay old drabble, circa 1998...) My new neighbor seemed nice enough, in a macho ignoramus kind of way. His cluttered apartment had porno mags scattered everywhere. He got us beers, turned on the television "That dude's a goddamn faggot." "That actor? You heard this?" "I just know. I always know." I saw one serious flaw in his claim, but just nodded "And him too!" "Gene Hackman? You sure?" "Positive. 'Cause whenever I see a homo, I get this.... reaction. Kinda like my grandma knowing it was gonna rain. Fuckin' queers are everywhere." "What kind of reaction?" "It's like....... my dick gets hard." //////////////////// //////////////////// Lightning McQueen turned his back on fame & glory to be with the woman he loved, but there was something she had been hesitant to tell him.. #11 /////////// BODY WORK (a brief tale of romance based on Pixar's CARS) "You quit racing to be with me, Lightning? Oh I should've told you. You'll hate me!" "Impossible!" "I haven't been honest. This is a new body." "Wrecks happen. But you're okay now." "No, a DIFFERENT body. I was---and my chassis is---Mustang." "Don't talk crazy, Sally. Mustangs are boy cars......... Oh." Lightning was disturbed. He'd rubbed tailpipes with this vehicle "But you're such a Porsche!" "I always was, inside. I hated being a muscle car." Lightning took a long drive. Returned "Well...... every relationship has its flaws to overcome." "So I'm 'flawed'?" "No, you're perfect. I meant mine." ///////////////////// ///////////////////// #12 ////////// Some folks call it a Kaiser Bag. But I call it a.. SLING BAG (A t.g.tale based on Billy Bob Thorton's film Sling Blade, in five drabble-length chapters...) 1.) Well they let me outta there. I dint have hardly no money, and no place to stay, but i knowed one thing. After 8 years of them tellin me i had to dress like what they wanted, which was a boy, i needed some purtyin up Then I seen it. MIMI'S SALON.. I axed, you do hair stylin? Kin ya do mine? The gal sayed well whatcha want? Ya got this nice thick long hair I sayed i dunno, what's good? She sayed how 'bout a french braid? I sayed i like french braids She tole me have a seat. Uhuhn.. 2.) The gal put my head back, started warshin my hair. That felt nice. Jesus she sayed, what ya been warshin it with, lye? Well I dint like her takin Our Lord's name in vain, and almost went for my bag right there. But that's what got me inta trouble in the first place, so I dint. Sayed i been usin institution shampoo She like jumped. INSTITUTION?! Are you that fella caused a ruckus couple years back goin around smackin folks with a tote bag? I sayed it warnt a tote bag, it was a sling bag. And i aint a fella 3.) Well mimi---that was her name---she gets a phone call halfway through doin my braids. So i go ahead and finish 'em up Where'd ya learn to do that, she axed? I sayed i just watched you Then a lady come in for a poodle cut. Mimi whispers you watch what i'm doin here. Then says lady, my cousin Gigi gonna finish you up That lady looked scared of me but sayed okay. And I could see how it should go. Did her hair real nice, and she was happy And that's how I come to work for mimi 4.) So me and mimi was cuttin, warshin and stickin fingernails on gals and gabbin. Her gabbin, mostly. And then it was five a'clock Closin' up, mimi ax what i wanna be a woman for Well why you wanna be a woman, i axed She sayed 'cause i am one, silly I sayed well so am i Oh, mimi sayed. I think i heard of this. Anyway go home and be here nine sharp I stood, wonderin where to go She axed you aint got no home, do you? I sayed no And mimi sayed a bad word, but nice like 5.) We walked 2 blocks to mimi's house, her mutterin about how crazy this was, takin in some crazy transvegemite from the nuthouse Mimi axed you won't go psycho on me, willya? I sayed yer bein so good to me, I reckon not She showed me her garage. A mattress in there. Sayed sorry it ain't much I sayed nobody's tellin me what to wear, who i "really" am. I reckon it's perfect She axed you got somethin to sleep in? Yer a big, uh ...... girl, but so was my sister Katie. Here's her nightie I slept real good that night Uhuhn ////////////////////// ///////////////////// (These last 2 aren't transgender or even LGBT but I think they have pretty good punchlines:) ////////// THE RINGER The crowds cheered for Meredith as her team helped her out of the swimming pool and into her wheelchair As she wheeled herself toward the stand to receive her fourth consecutive gold medal it was announced that her wins had all been disqualified, and she was barred from competing Meredith was furious, "Just what the hell kind of nonsense are you pulling here?" "The Paralympics are for disabled people," said the angry official The legless swimmer crowed, "Hel-LOOOOO! Are you completely stupid? You see this wheelchair? I can't walk, never could. What am I then if not handicapped?" "A mermaid!" ///////////////////// ///////////////////// ////////// THE HELLFIRE KID TELLS HIS TALE Some boys dream of becomin' ship captains, others jungle explorers. Maybe a few dream of being lamplighters. But my judgment was polluted by penny dreadfuls and tales of the old Wild West. So when the Devil offered me my heart's desire for the price of something you couldn't see and that didn't weigh nothin', I told him to make me an unbeatable gunfighter I probably shouldn'ta said unbeatable. After killing my first hundred men it warn't much fun at all. Hell one time, just to see what would happen, I didn't even draw. Somehow the feller shot and killed hisself! I'm close to ninety now, and soon Old Scratch will be claimin' my soul. But no one can deny I was a legend in my day.. The Faustus Gun in the West

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I let out a long groan as my contraction ended. My husband rubbed my back encouragingly. In spite of how painful this was, I couldn’t help but wish that this pain wouldn’t end. Most women are excited to have labor be over and to finally meet the c***d that they have carried and protected in their womb for nine months. I’m not.Today is the day that I will find out if I have to admit to my husband that I have been unfaithful. Soon, I will push out my firstborn, and it’s up in the air as to if my...

Slutty Whore Fianceacutee Part 2

Slutty Whore Fiancée (Part 2) (see Part 1 first) There was that same avoidance after our second amazing night of perverse debauchery. By the time I woke up, stiff and sore, on the living room carpet, Helen had cleaned herself up and was her normal old self again and acted like nothing had happened. To tell the truth, I was thankful. I'd done and said things to her I was deeply ashamed of. I'd treated a smart, beautiful woman I really loved like she was nothing more important than three holes...

My StoryChapter 2

The week before they left I was doing both of them – Billy in my ass and Bert in my pussy – when Billy said: "We need to make a change here." "What?" I asked. "It doesn't seem right that you don't have a cock in your mouth. All of your holes should have something in them." I didn't say anything, just moaned as he slammed his cock into me. The he said: "Okay Jim, come join the party" and Jimmy Melbourne came out of the closet. Jimmy was naked and he had a hard on and it led the...

Young teen discovers his love for cock

When I was very young, I found a "Playgirl" magazine. As I nervously flipped through the pages, I found myself becoming aroused by the pictures of all the naked men. I was drawn to the images of their cocks. Their manhoods looked so sensual, so manly and beautiful. When I read the sex stories inside, I found myself imagining I was the girl, getting to touch and suck cock. I began to dream about it, to lust after it.I soon got a chance to live out my fantasy. I was over at a friend's house for a...

My Little PonyFiM

You are a person from a world much like our own, but over three hundred years in the future. By that time holographic simulators have gotten so advanced that 90% of the population basically lives their whole adult life in virtual reality, and the advances in automation mean that almost no one has a 'job' any more, we all live on the planetary "Basic Living Stipend" protected by our benevolent pseudo-goddess "Lady Macintosh".* *(The name the singularity chose for itself.) You however are in...

Blondie And The Slaver Girls Of Bondos

Chapter One Chapter One My name is Jane Fisher but everyone calls me Blondie, I am 16 years old and I have just qualified as an undercover agent in the fight against the Slaver Girls from the planet Bondos. I volunteered and was accepted as an agent because of my age and looks. The Slaver Girls have been abducting young, very attractive blond haired girls and no one has figured out yet where the victims are being taken to, or why. This is to be my mission, to infiltrate their base on the...

Nina Chapter 13

Tuesday I got a phone call late in the afternoon. My home number showed on the display. I picked up the receiver. "Hey, baby," I said, a greeting that should work for either Nina or Sandy. Nina's voice. "Hey babe! How's your day?" "It's been a normal day. So far." "We had two visits. One was a big truck with a piano on the back, and the second was a nice black lady from social services." "How'd that go?" I asked. Giggle. "I gave her the grand tour. She had to ease around...

Lesson Learned

My name is Josh and this is a story about my girlfriend, our teacher and me. My girlfriends name was Ashley and we had been dating for over the past 2 years. We both were 18 years old and seniors in high school. I was 5’11”, had long black hair and since I was on the soccer team had an athletic build. Ashley was 5’3”, had straight black hair and an amazing body (34C-24-32), she was a cheerleader. During high school we both were parts of the popular crowd. Ashley and I had been very experimental...

Brandys Deep Throat Adventures Part 3 Pg 2

A couple of times, the postman prematurely said “Hello, Brandy” and it wasn’t her. First, after my weekend with Sean’s wife, he convinced Melanie to try out the ‘dog hoist’, and Brandy was willing to share. So, on a Saturday morning, Sean drove Melanie over to Bill and Bonnie’s place, where I was to meet them at 7:30. I, in fact, decided to get there early to set up some cameras on the front lawn; and it’s a good thing I did, because Melanie was too excited to sleep that night and convinced...

Eporner Anal

Those of you who have been following my reviews have probably noticed that I’ve been on quite an anal kick lately. It’s true, my desire for anal porn tends to come and go, just like how I fuck—I cum and go. I don’t want to stick around for pillow talk after. No, I’m not making you pancakes in the morning, bitch, I just fucked your ass for four hours straight and made you cum ten times. Isn’t that enough? The last thing I am trying to do after you rimmed my asshole and let me cum all over your...

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Have A Good Feel She Loves It Part Two

“Fucking Hell, have they all come on the same bus?” I said laughing as we walked into the bar and main room. In the twenty minutes since leaving the bar to go onto the patio the place had transformed. I left with the lone Franco holding the fort and returned to find around a dozen people milling around. Linzey was behind the bar and her husband was busying himself setting up the DJ stand in the opposite corner to the television screen, which was now playing some soft porn. “Not quite, the...

The Anniversary Week Tuesday

The following story is an original work of fiction. I awoke feeling refreshed and excited. Of course part of my energy was from my early bedtime the evening before. Sierra and I had gone to bed right after our dinner and bath time together, which couldn't have been much later than 9:30. But mostly it was because my mind was abuzz with all of the possible scenarios Sierra might have planned out for us to engage in throughout the week. With her in charge, they could be anything... Well,...

Concupiscent CongregationChapter 23 Julie Doubled

"You got yourself some prime tail there, Ramsay. She's worth every buck I paid you. And there's another $500 if I can have her again." "Just wait in the next room," the deacon said in a low voice. And don't mess with the camera setup. You'll know when it's time to come back but for what you get next the price is $750." "For that it better be really good!" Newman went into the room adjoining the one he'd just left and saw three monitors that were displaying from different angles...

Dare Me Not Ch 13

It has been a while since the last installment. Thank you for your feedback over this period. This shall finish the arc that I started a few years ago… Recap: Drew and Janine have crossed a few more boundaries, but neither know what they’re getting themselves into. To make it worse, Natasha had seen them as they shared an overly intimately embrace in the garage (Ch 12). ***** ‘I’m gonna make her pay. I’ll make them both pay,’ Natasha seethed as she huffed back to Drew’s room. She fought back...

at home depot

I was in need of some new light bulb, so I went to the local Home Depot. it was very dark in the store, I thought maybe they where having trouble but I went in anyway. I made my way to the light section and saw no one, just as I rounded the corner by the bathroom, a masked person grabed me and dragged me into the office. there were three other people in the office, I could see the emploies tied up and sitting in a little closet. the first man took me around to the other side of the counter and...

My real life story Part7

I’m now 27 years old, 5.95 feet height, athletic body and average looking. I have my Own Business and I’m a Martial Arts and Yoga Trainer in Bangalore, Hyderabad and Chennai gyms. (Why so many places you will know in the stories. People who may know me might study these stories so I want to keep my identity undisclosed. I’m writing these stories with the permission of few ladies with whom I’m in contact with. I had Sexual encounters with aged, middle aged, married and many sex starved...

Office Visit

Introduction: Visit to the Doctor **This is the first story Ive written&hellip, I have more in my head if it is enjoyed** Chapter 1 The young girl sat nervously in the office chair. Her long, brown hair falling down past her shoulders as she crosses and uncrosses her legs nervously while she waits for her name to be called. Her hands fumble with a magazine as she tries to calm her nerves. This was not the first visit the nineteen year old had made to this doctor. But after each visit, she...

Flight Lessons

After my divorce following nearly twenty years of marriage, I settled into a condo in Central New Jersey. The combination of not having a wife and the freedom of condo living gave me newfound opportunity. The time saved by not having to maintain a house combined with the free time afforded me by being single was something I really made use of. It gave me the chance to do things I had always wanted to do but never had the time. Travel and time for my hobbies such as my guitar playing were no...

Her First Gangbang Part 3

Hi, so I continue from where we left last time. For a quick recap, Roshni had hot sex with a few of my friends when I was waiting outside a hotel like a pimp who had left her girlfriend to get fucked like a whore. After returning to the hotel, we saw the video clip of how Roshni got mauled by my friends who were hungrier than dogs to fuck her brains out. So now the reclaiming sex. This story is in parts and this is the third part. Do read the earlier parts to raise your dick in salute for the...

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