Better Than The Alternative : Chapter 21 free porn video

***Authors Note*** Happy New Year everyone. Hope everyone is having a good year so far, even if it's still early. I did want to let you know I'm still continuing this and will complete it till it says The End. Being a single parent, December was just too hectic to write any. Sorry for the extended break, I hope you still enjoy. ~~~ Rebecca Chapter 21 Thankfully, Mom only took about fifteen minutes to take all the pictures she wanted of both me and Shelly. I was still slightly in a daze as we were getting in Shelly's car. I knew I had seen myself in the mirror earlier but seeing pictures of myself and with Shelly was different. It was different than seeing my reflection in the mirror, in the camera it was like I was seeing myself how everyone else would see me. That caused me to start second guessing myself as I was climbing into the car. I realized that when I committed myself to this, I was so focused and had never given this a second thought. But now... Everything was different, or at least it would be different. No matter how much I had claimed to accept this about myself, I had still constantly been declaring to everyone that I was still a guy. Even with the last week of not hiding my breasts, I was still claiming that. Now I'm dressed as Tinkerbell and headed to the dance where everyone would see me like this. "Jordan?" I mean I was beautiful, and that wasn't my vanity talking either. In the mirror I had only seen myself in a costume, but the pictures... God it was weird. I mean, I knew I was looking at myself in the photos, but this time I was able to see and appraise my appearance from a 'mostly' guy perspective. I was a knockout... Shit... "Jordan!" I vaguely heard Shelly's voice, but I was so wrapped up in my thoughts her outburst didn't break through. Even though I was still short, I knew I had a figure most girls would kill for and my dress hid none of it for the imagination. The makeup, hair, and heels only added to the whole image of a young beautiful girl excited for her first dance. The excitement I saw on my face in the picture was what had totally unnerved me. I was a guy, at least I thought I was in my head, who was standing there the epitome of femininity and I was smiling. Fuck that, I wasn't just smiling I was glowing... Suddenly I felt the car lurch as Shelly had swerved into a parking lot and had almost locked up her brakes whipping into the parking space. She blurted out, "JORDAN! Look at me!" I glanced over at her and saw her worried expression and then noticed I was leaned forward clutching myself and rocking in the passenger seat. I also realized how fast and how hard I was breathing and also how fast my pulse was racing. Great... I softly muttered in between my ragged breaths, "Shit... I'm sorry..." Reaching over to rest her hand on my shoulder to try to console me she asked, "What's wrong? I thought you were okay with this." Still trying to get my breathing under control I muttered, "I am... Or I was... It just... Hit me... You know?" She shook her head and softly said, "No I don't Jordan... Breathe slower okay? I'm afraid you're going to pass out if you don't. I thought you were okay with this?" I gasped, "I am... Was... I don't know... I just realized... What it would look like to everyone... I've been telling everyone I'm still a guy... I don't look anything like a guy right now..." She told me, "Jordan relax okay... There's no reason to get bent out of shape okay? It's just a costume." I shook my head and asked, "Is it though? I'm not sure anymore..." It took her a second to realize what I had said and her eye's opened wide. She thought for a second and asked, "Look... If this is too much for you, we can call it off okay?" I blurted out, "No... Sam's looking forward to it too much... I can't call it off..." She sighed, "Jordan if you're struggling this bad, she'd understand." I shook my head violently and said, "I'm not... Calling this off... I couldn't do that to her... Just give me a minute and I'll be okay...." She blurted out, "Jordan you're not okay, you're hyperventilating... Please calm down! Sam would understand." I told her, "Yeah... She would... I'm not going to let her down Shell..." She whispered, "Jordan, she wouldn't want you to do this to yourself..." Still trying to get my breathing to slow down I told her, "Shell... This is her first dance... As in HER first dance... There's no way... In hell... That I'm not going to make it..." Shelly's eyes opened wide at that realization as she gasped, "Jordan that's... That's amazing..." I just shrugged my shoulders as she gathered herself and after a moment she said, "Okay then... Try to think about something else, anything else..." I muttered, "I'm trying Shell..." After a few moments passed and I heard her whisper, "I can't believe I'm about to do this..." The next thing I knew Shelly gently grasped me by my cheeks and leaned over and gave me a long gentle kiss. In the middle of my panic attack all I could think of was how soft and warm her lips felt against mine. Also, how sensual it felt to have our lipstick covered lips sliding against each other's. We ended up kissing for several long moments before I came to my senses and pulled away. "Shelly! I can't! What about Sam or Rachel?" I started to say but her smile caught me in mid thought. She watched me for a moment while biting her lip and finally asked, "So is your breathing back under control?" I thought about it and nodded. I was still breathing hard, but it was slowing down. She then smirked, "I had to shock you somehow... Plus how bad you were feeling and still insisting on following through for Sam... Jordan it was so sweet... I'm sorry but I just wanted to kiss you for that reason... Besides I don't just go around kissing boys... Actually, you're the first one I've ever kissed..." I snorted, "With these boobs I don't look anything like a boy Shelly..." She smiled gently and told me, "No you don't and that might have made it easier... But you're still Jordan, even if you appear to be a smoking hot Tinkerbelle right now... You're my friend Jordan, who is doing something amazing for his girlfriend. No matter how hard it might be for him... I respect the shit out of that okay? I kissed you to snap you out of whatever spiral you worked yourself in to. I kissed you because you're an amazing friend. Are you going to be okay?" I just nodded trying to keep my emotions in check. Finally, after a few moments I said, "Yeah I will be... Once we get there and everyone sees... I guess it will be like pulling off a band-aid y'know?" She smiled and said, "Okay... Then let's get this show on the road. If everything starts to get the best of you again let me know before it gets too much okay?" She then pulled out of the parking lot and less than five minutes later we were pulling into the school. Upon parking she pulled me closer to her, at first, I thought she was going to kiss me again and almost pulled back. I quickly realized though she was repairing my makeup from the panic attack and from the kiss we shared. Once she was finished repairing our faces, she pulled her phone out and started typing on it. I was checking myself in the passenger visor mirror when I heard her phone beep. After a quick glance she informed me, "They are almost here. Are you ready for this Jordan?" I shrugged and grinned. "Hell if I know honestly... We're here though... I know that I'm ready to see Sam and Rachel's expressions when they see us." Shelly laughed. "You know what? Me too. Why don't we get your wings back on so Sam can see you in your full glory?" We quickly got out of the car and Shelly fastened on my glittery accessories and then she told me, "Oh Mom wanted me to give you this... She came up with it at the last minute and thought it would be cute." She then held up a box that looked like it had a corsage in it and she pulled it out and slid it onto my left wrist. I looked at it, it had some felt shaped into leaves and what looked to be a ball made of cheesecloth and it had little bells fasted to each of the leaves. I asked, "What is this?" She smiled. "It's supposed to look like a thistle bloom... She kind of rushed it... But shake your hand." I did and as the bells tinkled, I saw a tiny bit of glitter being shaken out of the center of it. She smiled, "You know Tink never talked, and you had to have your fairy dust, right?" It was kind of dorky but at the same time it was kind of cool, especially after all the help her mother had been. I laughed. "This is silly... But like in the best way... Thanks Shelly." I was giving her a hug as a car horn beeped. We turned around and saw Rachel and Sam both getting out of the car. Rachel was closest to me and her outfit made her look both dangerous and sexy at the same time. She was wearing leather pants with a leather jacket that mostly covered a corset. She had a mask on that was tied behind her head, the mask though didn't hide how she had done her makeup though. She had blood red lipstick on and her eyes were definitely done up dark. She had taken the idea of the swashbuckling pirate and femmed it up a lot. I was stunned at how good she looked, and I heard Shelly gasp beside me. Rachel's eyes kept dancing back at Shelly and at me, it was like she was trying to decide who to be shocked at the most. It was then when I heard Sam. "Jordan? Oh... My... God... You're..." she said as she looked me up and down and in a soft breathy voice finished, "Gorgeous..." I blushed but then as I glanced at her costume it took me a moment to figure out what she had done. She was wearing some soft leather boots, with dark green tights. As I followed her legs up the tights gave way to a dark green tunic dress, it looked like she had stained a sort of leaf pattern on it. She had a leather belt with a plastic sword tucked in the side. Her face was made up lightly, almost like she wasn't wearing any. I then noticed the elfin ears, much like my own, and the green hat sitting a bit off center on her head. I whispered, "Wait... You're... We match..." She laughed. "Yeah... This is crazy... Nobody was supposed to know what I was doing... How did you figure it out?" I shook my head. "I didn't... It was just... All my ideas were coming up lame... I was about to give up when I was looking in the mirror one evening and realized I sort of looked like her... I knew you wanted to see how I'd look like this... I mean like a girl..." I stopped talking I couldn't get my thoughts in order, so I took a deep breath and asked, "So how'd you decide to be Pan?" She giggled but was still eyeing me up and down with awe clearly written on her face. She smiled. "That day when you told us your idea about going as something that you're definitely not... I thought about it being a neat idea and tried to think of a boy costume. I then remembered how much you loved reading the story... With my transition the whole 'lost boy' theme sort of fit..." Rachel asked after she had shared a gently kiss with Shelly. "You two really didn't plan this?" Sam responded while still staring at me, "Nope not at all... Jordan used to read and reread the book all the time. I just remembered him always reading it, so I thought he'd appreciate it." I smiled and sniffed away the moisture forming at her remembered that. "Yeah it was a way to escape my health issues and everything... I mean the idea of being taken somewhere where I'd never get older... I'd never get sicker... Yeah..." Sam quickly came over and blotted the corner of my eyes with a tissue she pulled out of thin air it appeared. She whispered, "It's okay Jordan... You're not sick anymore..." I smiled. "I know... It's just we're here... You're finally getting to be you... And we've got Shelly and Rachel... Even if I'm dressed up as a fairy... With everything going on... I'm happy the way things are and it's..." She smiled and whispered, "Overwhelming..." She then leaned in and gave me a gentle kiss that sent shivers all over me. After she held me for a few moments, Shelly cleared her throat and asked, "So you all ready?" Sam and Rachel gave the affirmative and I couldn't resist so I held up my left hand and shook the 'corsage' and the bells jingled as glitter gently fell to the ground. All three of the girls giggled and then we joined hand in hand and headed inside. To say I was nervous as we walked up to the gym would be a drastic understatement. Thankfully I was surrounded by the girls, otherwise I would have chickened out. I don't know why I got so tickled at Mr. Millers reaction as he looked at us and his eyes froze as he stared at me. Maybe it was just my nerves were totally shot, but his confusion was genuinely hilarious to me. I squeaked out, "Hi Mr. Miller." He quickly averted his gaze and shook his head softly before he looked back at me and said, "Miss... I mean Mr. uh... Jordan?" The girls were snickering at him, but I gently laughed and said, "It's just a costume Mr. Miller, all my other ideas just didn't go with..." I quit talking and just gestured down at my body. Sadness passed over his face for a quick second to be replaced with something I couldn't read. Sam spoke up, "Plus it goes with our theme don't you think?" He smiled and nodded. "Okay... Well you girls have fun... I mean you girls and Jordan..." In frustration at my giggling at him he shrugged, "Why do I even bother, you all have fun and be safe okay? Jordan if anyone bothers you or Sam, come to me or one of the teachers okay. Don't handle it yourself." We all said in unison, "Yes sir!" and then giggled as we moved past him into the gymnasium. With the interaction and confusion of Mr. Miller I noticed my nerves were gone. I was amazed at how quickly an insignificant thing like that could change my whole perspective. I glanced around the gym and noticed it wasn't very full yet, after all we were a few minutes early and as everyone knows the popular kids can't be bothered to be on time. So, it was just us four and about two dozen other students there. We walked around and most of the students were cool about our costume. Then again most of those here already would be considered the geeks, mostly kids from the social clubs that the Jocks and preps would avoid at all cost. The only thing that was unsettling for me was the way several of the guys wouldn't look anywhere but my cleavage while talking to me... It took a bit of calming from Sam to keep me from going off. Sadly, I just realized that was one thing that girls had to deal with, and the way things were going that I'd just have to get used to dealing with it. The music started promptly at seven and we continued to mill around talking to people. More and more students started appearing and it was about seven fifteen when I heard a familiar voice behind me say, "No fucking way! Holy Shit Jordan!" I spun around to see Tom with his eyes wide open I blurt out, "Be very careful what you're about to say." He thankfully glanced quickly at my chest as his eyes looked up to find my face. He sputtered, "Dude... I mean... Your... Hot... Like... Shit..." Sam put her arm around me and snickered as a cute girl came up behind him and gently smacked Tom on the back of the head as she laughed, "This works on my parents record player sometimes when it skips..." Tom quickly shut his mouth and blushed. The girl giggled and held her hand out and said, "I'm Steph, you must me Jordan and Sam. I'm his date tonight." Stunned, not because she knew who we were, but that Tom actually had a date. I asked, "Uhh... So what are you doing with him though? Did you lose a bet or something?" Steph actually snorted. "I know you're Jordan now... Tom's told me about you..." She then glanced up and down at me and Sam and smiled, "That is totally bad ass..." Once Tom had recovered, we talked for a few minutes. It turned out she plays softball for one of the private schools in the area and had met at the batting range downtown. Turned out him helping us out with softball did him some good after all. She thought it had been really cool of him, being a 'bad ass' baseball player, to help the girl's team out. We had been talking about ten minutes when Shelly came up to us. "Jordan, there's a problem with Brett and Lynds..." Shocked I ask, "Are they okay?" She told me, "Yeah, but they aren't being allowed in. Could you and Sam come to the office? Mr. Miller pulled them in there." Nodding we left Steph and Tom and quickly followed Shelly and Rachel to the office. Right before we opened the door to go in, I heard Brett's voice say, "But sir we're not trying to be disrespectful. I promise." Shelly opened the door and Sam and I walked in to see Mr. Miller looking upset and then I saw Lyndsey and Brett and was stopped in my tracks by what I saw. I wasn't the only one that was stopped in their tracks. Sam stopped right beside me with the same expression I'm sure I had. Mr. Miller paused and looked at us for a moment and spun back to look at Brett and Lyndsey. "I thought you said they knew? This is why I'm calling your parents." That spurned me to speak up, "Wait a minute, Mr. Miller what's going on? Why are they in trouble?" He sighed and told me, "Jordan... I can't have students pulling stunts like this when..." He paused trying to think of a way to say what he wanted. He continued, "With Samantha, and yourself... We were afraid students would try to make a mockery of you two... They claimed that you two knew about this, but it's obvious you didn't. I need you four to go back to the gym, please." Wait what? I blurted out, "But we did know... We just didn't know what they were going to be dressed up as... That was a surprise... They both are our friends. They talked to us about this weeks ago." That took the wind out of Mr. Miller's sails. He looked at me and then at Sam who was nodding. He asked, "You did? You're okay with this?" Lyndsey spoke up, "Yes they are, they knew we were doing this in support of them. We weren't making fun or teasing them in any way." Mr. Miller grunted, "Oh... Then... I'm..." I spoke up, "Mr. Miller, look I think it's cool that you're looking out for us and everything. But... You're going kind of overboard here. You knew Brett is a friend..." He sighed. "You're right... I'm sorry... I just..." Sam came up and put her hand on his arm. "It's cool Mr. Miller. Thank you... But we're cool with them." He apologized profusely to both Lyndsey and Brett and then ushered us out of the office. In the hallway I finally was able to fully take in their costumes and I was still just as blown away. Lyndsey was cute as hell wearing a leather jacket, white tank top, with dark blue jeans with big cuffs rolled up at the hem with black loafers. I might not have realized what her costume was, but Brett's was the one that gave it away. He was standing on black and white three-inch heels wearing a poodle skirt, a nice top, it appeared Lyndsey had clipped in blonde extensions and given him a blond curly bouffant hair style. His face was even made up like a pinup model from the sixties. It was the pink satin looking jacket that completed the look though. Even with his size I had to admit he looked pretty good considering. I couldn't help it though, I started giggling. Brett looked embarrassed and asked, "Do I look that bad?" I quickly shook my head and told him while grinning, "No you really don't Brett... I just realized what you two were going as... Or should I call you Sandy or maybe Brittany?" At his shocked expression I remembered that Shelly and Rachel had no clue about 'Brittany' and quickly told him, "I'm just kidding man... Damn I thought you were tall before..." He blushed slightly. "It's okay... Just call me Britt like always..." I barely caught the 'I' sound and not the 'E' and looked up to see him, or her... Hell I don't know anymore... I know he's trans and presenting as a girl... But that's a secret to most everyone... Crap... Anyway, Britt was winking at me smirking. We talked a bit and complimented each other about our costumes on the way back to the gym. When we walked up to the entrance, it was obvious that the crowd had more than doubled since we had left to help out our friends. I took a deep breath and with my friends by my side I held my head high and stepped through the doorway. I guess most of the crowd had either heard about me already or seeing me no longer hiding my 'asset's the last few weeks. Britt was the talk of the gym. At first people were kind of standoffish and pointed and laughed, but soon it was obvious to everyone that Britt and Lynds were there and back together. Also, with their matching costumes it appeared to be fooling people just like Lyndsey had thought it would. Everyone was acting like it was just a costume. It didn't take very long for us to join the rest of the softball team and their dates, along with Tom, Steph, and Rick. Everyone looked like they were having a blast, and once people got over their initial shock of me dressed up as Tinkerbelle, they quickly just treated me like they always had... Other than Rick and Tom kept staring occasionally, but as soon as I caught them staring, they looked away quickly as if nothing had happened. It was weird... Honestly knowing what I looked like though... I couldn't really blame them for staring. If I wasn't with Sam, I'd probably be staring at a girl that looked like I did... Maybe a bit more discreetly then they did it, but I'd have still looked. At least that was how I was trying to rationalize it. The entire time we were hanging out with the group, small groups would hit the dance floor and return, only to have other groups go take their place. We'd been mingling for about forty minutes, and even though Sam had tried to nudge me out on the dance floor I kept resisting. I did want to dance with her, but my nerves were returning. The thought of bouncing around like everyone else, and how I was dressed, was causing my anxiety to try to come back. It was just before eight when this one song started. The girls screamed and then with Shelly and Rachel's help Sam drug me out to the floor as Pink started to sing. They no longer were giving me a say so in the matter. Even with my nerves, being in the middle of the excited group of girls and staring at Sam's smiling face made me relax slightly. Then as she started to sing the first verse while dancing, it completely made me forget my anxiety. I started to try to move like she was, but the beginning was a bit weird to dance to. It was about half way through the verse when I recognized the song and started listening to the words and then I just let the music start to reverberate through me. Whatever I was doing must have worked, by the second verse we all were bouncing around and yelling 'Raise Your Glass' at the top of our lungs. What can I say? The song spoke to me in that moment. Even with the DJ played an extended remix of it, once it was over, we didn't leave the dance floor until after four more songs had played. Shelly laughed and pointed to the floor of the gym and you could tell where all I had been bouncing around thanks to my 'corsage' and the trail it was leaving. There was a thin layer of glitter everywhere on the dance floor and the corsage was about half-full of glitter still from what I could tell. I was slightly out of breath and had a sheen of perspiration over me from all the dancing when Sam pulled me back to the side. We were taking a break and as we were watching Britt and Lyndsey, Sam whispered to me, "I'm worried about her." I asked, "Who? Lyndsey?" She shook her head and said, "No. Britt... This is supposed to be a costume remember? No one is supposed to figure out the truth... Do you see how naturally she's started moving? When they both came in, she was walking around like a jock would walk in heels... She's been out there dancing with Lynds for the last five songs without any problems..." I watched them both out on the floor and Sam was right. Although she was already tall, the heels put her at around six and a half feet tall, but she was dancing gracefully. At least more gracefully than her large frame should allow her to. I nodded and told her, "I see what you mean. Hopefully no one else picks up on that... Maybe we can play it off that she's just gotten used to walking in heels... I mean look at me, I'm not having any issues either." She looked back at me and smiled. "True... You might have to wear those more often though." I turned my head at her in confusion and asked, "Why would you want me to do that?" She grinned and said, "It makes it easier for me to do this." She then leaned over and gave me a soft kiss, which once again sent chill bumps all over my body. As much as I wanted to keep kissing her, I gently pulled away and told her while smiling, "I'm not promising anything, but it's not a definite no either." She grinned at me and asked, "Are you thirsty?" I nodded. "Yeah take a seat and I'll go grab us some punch." She didn't think that was a good idea, but I quickly convinced her that I'd be fine and then made my way to the refreshment table. I hadn't forgotten I was dressed the way I was, but maybe I had just become comfortable in it and it wasn't really a concern for me. I was standing in line for the punch when I felt someone tap my shoulder. I quickly spun around to see Teddy. I immediately clenched my fists at my side and asked, "What Teddy?" He looked surprised and quickly looked down at me while shoving his hands in his pockets. "Nothing Jordan... I was just... I was going to... Look Jordan... I'm sorry." Now I was the one that was surprised as I asked, "What are you sorry about?" He said, "Everything, I guess... How I treated Sam... You... I've been a shitty friend... I'm sorry..." I was trying to wrap my head around what he was telling me, he hadn't actually said anything rude other than Sam being trans creeped him out... He'd been standoffish and kept to himself for a while, but he hadn't actively gone out of his way to say or do anything to hurt either her or me. I asked, "So you're okay with all this suddenly?" He gently shrugged his shoulders like he was still a little kid being scolded. I tell him, "Teddy that's not an answer... Before you answer though this is just a costume tonight okay? I don't know what I'm going to do, or how I'm going to end up... If I go all the way are you still going to be shrugging your shoulders?" He finally looked up at me and said, "Jordan... This is still kinda weird to me... I'm trying to get over that... To wrap my head around it... My parents just always told me all this crap... I bought into it... Everything... I'm sorry... I'm trying okay... I've thought about everything you've gone through... I'm sorry I've been an ass... I know I have been..." I gave him a half smile and asked, "Okay then... So, what now?" He shrugged his shoulders again but caught himself and said, "I don't know... I hadn't planned any further than apologizing... I've actually got to get back to my date, but I wanted to say that to you..." I told him, "Okay I appreciate it Teddy... Thank you... Maybe we can talk more in homeroom?" He nodded and before he turned to walk away, he blurted out, "You know, you and Sam looked good out there dancing... You know like you were happy... I also wanted to tell you that..." He blushed and turned away before I could respond. I was lost in my thoughts about what he had said when a voice being cleared caught my attention that it was my turn in line. I was still thinking hard about what Teddy had said to me when I returned and handed Sam her punch. She could see I was thinking about something and she asked, "What did he say to you?" I asked, "You saw?" She just worriedly nodded yes. I continue, "He wanted to apologize for being a shitty friend..." She asked, "Do you believe him?" I tell her, "Yeah... I guess I do... I mean he's still struggling with it... Supposedly his parents had filled him with a bunch of crap... He said he's trying to get over it... So that's something right?" She shrugged her shoulders. "I guess... We'll just have to see right?" I tell her, "Yeah I guess so... Hopefully he'll come around..." Quickly our conversation was over about Teddy, because Shelly and Rachel came over giggling about something. I couldn't help but see both of their lips were smeared from kissing. I couldn't help but grin, even though I still thinking about the last thing Teddy had said. He had said we looked happy. I admit I've been having my own struggle with myself, but tonight... Dancing with Sam and even though I'm dressed like a fairy princess, I have been having fun. More than that, I haven't thought about my condition once. As I finished my punch, I noticed Sam was smiling at me. She asked, "So what's got you in a such a good mood?" Before I could answer, the DJ paused the music and announced that he was going to slow it down for couples. I held my manicured hand out and asked, "What's a guy have to do to get a dance with his girlfriend?" She giggled and took my hand saying, "All you had to do was ask." We soon found ourselves dancing and swaying together. With my heels and her wearing boots without a heel I was almost as tall as she was. The song was almost over when she gently leaned in and whispered, "Shelly told me what happened to you earlier in the car. Jordan you didn't have to do that..." I whisper back, "Yeah I did Sam... I totally had to. I'd do anything for you." She gently kissed my cheek and then quickly drew back and tried to blow the glitter that had gotten on her nose. She laughed as she glanced down at us. "God we are never going to be able to get all this glitter off of us. It's everywhere. Whose idea was it?" I giggle and pull her back towards me as we sway to the music, I fuss, "It was Shelly. I'll have you know that it's not glitter, it's my pixie dust and I'm sprinkling that shit everywhere." She laughed. "Yeah you are... I guess now we just need to find your happy place... Right?" I stopped swaying and look at her in her eyes and tell her before I lean in to kiss her. "I already have..."