Therapy Doll
A young man finds himself in the middle of two personalities. It's in
the middle of that discovery that he finds himself about to become
homeless. There is a plan, albeit an odd plan but he and he alone
might be able to bring those two together and in doing so find a home.
All he's got to do is become a Therapy Doll.
This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to locations, persons
living or dead is purely coincidental. There is also sex between
consenting partners over the age of 18 which may include sexual fetish
elements and role-playing. As always I write this for your enjoyment.
A comment if able would be greatly appreciated. Hugs Mary Beth.
Mrs. Helen Baker; Mark Winston and Jess Ballard, assistant trainers.
Julie, Helen's daughter
Story Chapters
Hospital
Home
Pantyhose And Diapers
The Proposal
Julie And Janet
Diapers And Little Girls
The Play Room
First A Diaper Change
Next Your Little Dress
Vanquished
Evolution
HOSPITAL
Mrs. Baker finished the last of her coffee, stood and turned for the
refuge container against the wall, moving there to toss her empty cup
before turning for the door. The hospital cafeteria was quiet as Helen
walked through the doors. She was excited.
Talking with Nurse Carol had been so very beneficial. Helen now had
the makings of an idea. She also had more than enough reason now to
introduce herself to the young man in room 314 as she walked to the
elevator, pushed the up button and rode it to the third floor.
Helen had worked long enough to know where to look and reached the
desk, found the chart and took a moment to review the particulars for
confirmation. She wasn't an expert, far from it, but from her
conversations and according to his chart the young man was just about
to be released.
Ash she whispered closing the folder. Bad news for him, good news for
her. Now all she needed to do was make her case. Ash too had a reason
to hear her out, he was going to have a birthday in four months. Ash,
at seventeen was about to age out.
A disgusting term Helen thought. In four months Ash would be homeless.
Ash would be transitioned from formal control within the foster care
system to so called "Independent living". What that really meant was
Ash was about to lose his foster care room, and financial support.
A nice way to describe homelessness. In other words, Ash was about to
be tossed out onto the street. Rose shook her head in disgust, and
turned for the hall that would lead to Ash's room. Ash was in room 314
or would be till two o'clock today. It was almost ten as she quietly
reached his door.
"Hello Ash, I'm Mrs. Baker. Helen Baker. I'm one of the volunteers
here," Helen said coming into Ash's room with her cart. Helen's cart
gave her access to every floor and every room in the hospital.
"Hi Mrs. Baker," Ash said as Helen pushed fully into Ash's room. He
was alone but it wouldn't be for long. Checking at the nurses station
Helen had also found that Ash's discharge papers were already clipped
together placed within his chart and ready for the doctor's signature.
In just a couple of hours, mostly waiting for the doctors official
release, he'd be out. Helen suspected from here he'd be heading back
to his foster home. Then just a few more months before being tossed
out on the street.
"I guess you'll be leaving us today," Helen said cheerfully. Pushing
her cart of magazines towards the end of the bed. Normally she'd push
it within visual range of the patient but she knew Ash was leaving and
wasn't there to leave reading material.
It was pure luck to have overheard the nurse talking about Ash, and the
drawbacks of Foster care. The young man she was about to hire was
nearly perfect, and his circumstances almost ideal or at least for her
they were. Best of all his dreams of becoming a jockey perfectly
aligned with her's.
"Yes ma'am that's right. No magazines today Mrs. Baker, I'll be
leaving," Ash said.
"That's what I heard," Helen said before she cleared her throat as she
added pointing to the obvious, "But what about that?"
"The diaper? I'm afraid that stays," Ash said letting the question
hang as his cheeks grew slightly redder.
"I'm sorry Ash I didn't mean to embarrass you like that. I mean that
wasn't my question. I was going to ask about the ankle? It's still in
a cast," Mrs. Baker said but then added, "But since you brought those
up, I guess those too?"
"Oh! Well, I've got the wear the cast for one more week. But they put
a heel on the bottom so I can leave here with a cane so I can walk with
it. Well, not exactly... You know what I mean because they push you
out in a wheel chair, but I can get around with a cane," Ash said.
"And the diapers end today as well then?" Helen asked.
"No? Actually, they don't really know about the diapers yet? Those
kind of look like a long time still. Definitely can't use the
catheters, but I'm sort of use to these and no one is going to know.
Outside of my foster mom and me that is. And I guess you I suppose."
"My lips are sealed Ash," Ms. Baker said mimicking closing a zipper
across her mouth.
"Thank you," Ash said smiling.
"You know Ash, that's another thing if you don't mind me asking? So I
did hear you are in foster care? Right?" Helen asked.
"Yes ma'am," Ash said.
"Can I asked you another very important question? It's something I
overheard by accident," Helen asked and added, "I just wanted you to
know I wasn't prying."
"Sure," Ash said.
"Ash, forgive me for intruding like this, but one of the nurses mention
that you wanted to become a Jockey? Is that true?" Helen asked.
"Oh yes ma'am. More than anything," Ash said and then added, "And as
you can see Mrs. Baker I definitely qualify, and I think with a little
practice I'd be pretty good at it."
"I think you would be too," Helen noted as Ash held his arms up to
emphasize his size. It was actually one of the reasons the diaper he
was wearing would also fit a toddler.
"Why do you ask Mrs. Baker?" Ash asked.
"Ash, would you mind calling me Helen?" Ms. Baker asked.
"Sure," Ash said and then added, "Helen."
"Thank you. Well Ash believe it or not when I'm not volunteering here
at the hospital as a candy striper my husband and I own and run a horse
breeding farm not far from here. It's outside of the city limits just
before the foothills," Helen said.
"Horse breading, like for race horses?" Ash asked enthusiastically.
"Like race horses. We raise mostly Arabians for flat racing," Helen
said and then added, "The other thing is we like to hire young men who
want to become apprentice jockeys to do our track warm ups, and I think
you'd be a good candidate."
"Are you serious?" Ash asked.
"Very serious," Helen said and then added, "It's actually very hard
finding young men qualified mentally and physically that are willing to
step into the training."
"Wow? Me? Seriously? That would be awesome Mrs. Baker, I mean Helen.
I mean it, that would really be awesome..." Ash said and then paused
and immediately started looking sad.
"What?" Helen asked.
It's just that... the thing is Helen.... It's like this.... Helen,
I'm seventeen. I'll be eighteen soon, four months actually. The thing
is I'm in foster care and in four months I get aged out. What I'm
saying is when I turn eighteen they make you leave the system which
includes the room I'm in," Ash said.
"That won't be a problem," Helen said.
"It will be Helen. It's just that I'm going to be moving in a few
weeks and I'm not sure where I'll be staying yet so I won't have an
address or phone number till I can afford a phone. Tell you what, let
me settle in and once that happens, and if you're still hiring, maybe I
can call you then," Ash said looking very sad and dejected.
"Wait? But that's just it Ash! That's why I'm here. Ash, you didn't
hear me! I also heard that you'd be aging out in foster care. Which
makes this so perfect. I mean we could bring you on as one of the
ranch hands," Helen said.
"I'm not sure I understand," Ash said.
"Ash, we have to keep several young men on site for our early morning
warm ups. It's also part of the training. We have to have the horses
out on the track very early. You'd be one of those young men. That
means you'd have a room on the ranch," Helen said.
"Wait, you're saying I could live there?" Ash asked.
"Yes. It's kind of like a modern day bunk house. More like a dorm I
suppose. It's not much, the rooms are small but they are clean and
private and it's yours while you work there. We've got more than
enough livable space and that would be part of the deal. That is if
you'd be interested in something like that," Helen said.
"Are you kidding? Yes," Ash said and then hesitated as he added, "So
how did you know about foster care?"
"Ash, as you can see, I'm a Candy Striper. We hear stuff around here
all the time, and like I said, when I heard you wanted to be jockey I
knew you'd be the perfect candidate," Helen said and added, "And
finding a kid that wants to become a jockey is rare."
"And the diaper thing doesn't bother you?" Ash asked.
"Now why would that be a bother," Helen said and then added, "Actually,
it might turn out to be an advantage but let's talk about that when the
time comes okay?"
"How would me in diapers be an advantage?" Ash asked curiously.
"Let's not worry about that for right now. For now I'd like to know if
you really are interested?" Helen asked.
"Are you kidding? YES! So when would I be able to start?" Ash asked.
"When can you start?" Helen asked.
"Can you drive me to where I live right now so I can pick up my
clothes," Ash asked and added, "It would take me about two minutes to
pack."
"I can do that," Helen said laughing as she added, "I get off before
you get discharged."
HOME
Actually Helen had to wait for Josh to be released but once that was
done she brought her car around and helped him into the front seat. He
was legal by one inch to sit in the front making Helen laugh.
Ash had been right. Helen was as good as her word driving Ash to his
old foster care. It took Ash another fifteen minutes to sign a release
form to get him out before his eighteenth birthday, and he got fifty
dollars.
Ash hugged Ms. Anniston and as a parting gift she gave him a grocery
bag full of Pampers Cruisers, wipes and a used canister of baby powder.
The few meager things he owned were in a black plastic bag.
The ranch was twenty minutes from town without traffic. Ash was blown
away by the size of the "ranch" and Helen's kindness. She helped him
settle in when they arrived and introduced him to the other two boys
Mark Winston and Jess Ballard. Both had the title assistant trainers
and both did more or less what Ash would do. However, neither were
learning to be Jockeys.
He'd been told there were two other ranch hands and Julie, Helen's
daughter. Ash spent the next couple of days recuperating in his room,
and walking around learning about the place. As he got better he began
doing light chores around the place while his ankle heeled.
Before too long Julie, Helen's daughter, began joining him on his walks
around the stable showing him where everything was and what to do.
Julie and he immediately grew comfortable with each other. With his
cast removed Ash started learning how to ride with the help of the
other two boys. Within a couple of weeks he started getting his own
early morning warm ups schedule.
As was usually the case Ash ran a mix of warm ups according to the
trainer and owner's wishes. It was always dependent on the horses
under training. At the moment they had a half dozen horses doing a
full 12 furlongs.
Ash's first dumb question was what was a furlong? Both boys told him
the exact same answer at the exact same time: A furlong was a unit of
length equal to 220 yards. Ash did the math which meant one furlong
was 660 feet. That meant that 12 furlongs about a mile and a half or
the actual length of a horses run during a race.
Ash's skills grew as Helen watched her daughter's interactions with him
grow. Both Helen and Jack, Helen's husband watched intently. Ash and
Julie seemed to hit it off but they were not sure just how much yet.
They didn't push. They didn't dare and besides, they liked Ash.
Ash came around the final turn easing the reigns on a two year old that
morning. He eased pressure on his knees as well allowing his horse to
slow to a natural gate for the last three hundred feet. Ash learned
other terms from the trainer as well. Like speeds.
He'd made three runs, one at "good speed" another at "Track" and the
last again at "good speed" for three quarters of the track. The horse
felt warm, but not hot as Ash lifted off the saddle to level his ride
back to the paddocks.
Jack, the owner, told Ash he'd done a good job, but he would cool the
horse from the Paddock which was exactly what Mrs. Baker, Jack's wife,
wanted to do. She had mentioned that to Ash as he walked the horse out
and mounted for the ride out that morning.
Helen wanted to show the horse hot before letting Ash cool him down.
Unusual but not unheard of as he reached Mrs Baker and the man that
Mrs. Baker was standing with. Ash was guessing he was a buyer.
Jack, the other owner and Helen's husband, was also standing there and
took the reigns from Ash allowing Ash to jump down unencumbered. Ash
stepped back to give Mrs. Baker room to walk around the horse. The
intent was to see the horse without it's jockey as Jack nodded to Ash
to walk off a ways for the "buyers view".
Ash backed away and saw Julie then. He walked towards her out of
earshot and nodded at Julie who gave a slight wave back at him. He had
gotten use to bringing the horse in at this time of morning and
allowing one of the other ranch hands to take over so Ash could saddle
another horse.
Ash checked the training board for his next ride. That was Ash's work
schedule. No other horses were scheduled that morning leaving Ash
free. He had planned on going to his room to change his diaper.
"Hey," Ash said walking up the owner's daughter. Helen had insisted
Ash wear his new Jockey colors to impress the buyer. Ash wasn't a
Jockey but Helen thought he deserved the outfit when he was out on the
track just for the look. Ash felt wonderful wearing his "colors".
"Love the new colors," Julie said before adding, "I think one of my
dolls has a dress in that same pastel pink. You know what... Come to
think of it, she's one of those large companion dolls and I'll bet that
dress would actually fit you."
Ash shook his head and laughed an uncomfortable laugh, he was almost
getting use to Julie's teasing. But as he once said, it wasn't his
first rodeo and he gave as good as he got most times, but she was
almost right and compared to him she was actually a giant. Although he
used her size the same as she did.
"Well look who it is? So the rumors are true. There really is a Jolly
Green Giant living here at the Ranch," Ash said twisting instantly to
avoid Julies sweeping hand allowing him to run towards the stables.
Julie instantly began chasing him as Ash yelled, "Hey, don't forget you
started it."
"And I'm about to finish it," Julie yelled easily catching up to Ash as
they reached the large barn together.
"You'd better not mess up my colors," Ash yelled before adding, "Your
mother will kill you not me!"
They both hit the stacks of hay at almost the same time as Ash turned
just at the last moment to stop just in time to get tackled by Julie.
Both fell into the loose hay below the 20 foot stacks. They both
broke out in laughter as Julie covered Ash in hay before she stood to
brush her skirt and blouse free of the straw. Ash kicking free of the
pile he was under, stood and began his own brushing. Julie towered
over him.
"Your mother is going to kill me if she sees her new silks dirty
already," Ash said.
"Big deal! Besides, you're not even suppose to have silks yet," Julie
said and added, "You know she's spoiling you."
"Tell me about it. I'm getting teased by the other guys already. I
got them yesterday from Rose. She told me to wear them this morning
to impress that guy whoever he is. I guess they want him to think I'm
a Jockey or something," Ash said.
PANTYHOSE AND DIAPERS
"Jockey? That's rich! You're not even tall enough to be a good idea
yet," Julie said and added, "And he needs us more than we need him.
He's got a mare that needs a stud. Speaking of which?"
"Come on Julie. Why do you tease me like that," Ash said as Julie
rotated her hips as Ash added, "That's very personal and very private."
"I thought we were friends and I'm not talking about sex. Who said I
was talking about sex? I'm talking about studs, as in horses," Julie
said and added, "And I've already told you we can keep your secret.
Which isn't easy by the way."
"Right and all the while you knowing, there is not a damn thing I can
do about it," Ash said, and added, "So if it's so secret then why are
you teasing me about it?"
"Come on Ash, I'm not teasing. That's just us being playful. You're
just sensitive because you get all hung up on that stuff. Okay, fine,
but it would have been so much better if you'd just let us see you in
them. Okay, and now it's worse because you're wearing pantyhose and
diapers," Julie said snickering.
"Not pantyhose and you know it. If you please, it's Dance Skins Julie,
I'm wearing Dance Skins. Say it. It's not pantyhose. They are called
Dance Skins and they are tights, not pantyhose. Jockeys wear them
against the cold okay and this morning it was damn cold. We are not
wearing pantyhose because we are not cross dressing," Ash said shaking
his head.
"You guys! As soon as a girl even hints at the tiniest bit of
femininity you crash and burn. You sure get hung up on the little
things," Julie said and then added, "Doesn't matter why you wear them.
It just matters that you wear them. Doesn't change what they are just
because you're a guy. Those are girl's tights. Here, read my lips
G.I.R.L. tights. Not boy as in B.O.Y., but girl tights."
"Dance Skins," Ash said.
"Dance Skins, Mance Skins honey, they are still made for girls, girls
wear them because they make our legs shimmer and shine. Here, let me
see. Do your legs shimmer and shine when you wear them precious?"
Julie asked.
"Will you stop?" Ash pleaded swatting Julie's hand away as she tried
pulling his pants up out of his boots.
"Can we run our hands over your silky smooth legs? No and you know
why? Because you won't let us. What's up with that? Okay fine, no
girly legs, we can live with that, for now, but why won't you at least
let us see you in your diaper? That's medical right," Julie said and
added, "Surely you can let us at least see you in your medically
approved diaper?"
"See? That right there.... That's what I'm talking about! For your
information, what you are doing... that right there is against the
law," Ash said.
"Wait? What?" Julie said.
"You heard me? It is," Ash said and then added, "Did you know you
can't talk about that kind of stuff to an employee. You are the bosses
daughter! You my dear are management. In fact, you're not even
suppose to know about that stuff! For your information, that's private
and personal."
"Really?" Julie said with a smirk on her face.
"Really," Ash said and added, "It's... at least it's suppose to be
confidential. So how the hell did you guys even find out about that."
"You're kidding right? First of all my mom already knew right? Right!
She was a volunteer at the hospital remember. So mom knew even before
she hired you," Julie said.
"Okay, so that doesn't mean you get to spread it around like this," Ash
said.
"Secondly Ash," Julie said interrupting him as she added, "When my dad
found out we might be interested in you and you might be interested in
me, he ran a second background check along with your regular employment
background check. We knew about your diapers that way to."
"Wait? How come there were two background checks?" Ash asked.
"Honey, the firm that does our background checks is really good.
Especially for the guys that live here at the ranch. Right now we know
how much lint you got in your navel," Julie said.
"You mean he did... like an investigation," Ash asked.
"Duh? I mean yes, like a private eye investigation," Julie said and
added, "Look Ash, it's no big deal. Dad is not going to let anyone
live on the ranch that isn't checked out. In fact, it's in your favor.
We know you got hit by a bus and a bike rack messed you up and
catheters give you problems and you're small enough to fit into baby
diapers. So it's all good."
"Can't you just say diapers?" Ash said.
"Baby diapers! Why? Besides, I like they way that sounds. Baby
diapers! So get over it. Anyway, we know you wear baby diapers... Be
still my heart," Julie said and added, "So we got the hot's for a cute
guy. A really cute guy that wears baby diapers and what makes all this
even better is he's tiny and might even fit in little girl dresses, my
old dresses, if you can believe that. Dresses we wore when we were six
and seven years old."
"I give up," Ash said walking out of the barn in utter frustration.
"Where you going?" Julie asked.
"I"m getting the hell away from you two," Ash said.
"Hey, do you know you waddle?" Julie yelled and added, "And it looks so
damn cute with your butt in pink satin."
Ash reached the edge of the barn shaking his head. The sun was over
the roof tops warming the ground. The world was waking up as the ranch
began coming to life.
Ground fog began forming as a blanket off the lake while giant
sprinklers began shooting interrupted sprays over a large area of grass
next to a field already being groomed. Horses were let out as stable
and ranch hands started the day as a tractor moved by with a trailer
full of 30 foot sections of aluminum pipe.
Ash dared to look back and Julie waved. Ash turned away quickly
fighting the smile. She made him shudder. Both of them made him
shudder. Both he whispered as he imagined that first day and those
days that followed. At first it was just Julie. He'd been riding in
the near darkness when he rode in on a warm up and met her at the gate.
With Ash still on the horse they were literally eye to eye.
Julie stood six foot six. Of course Julie's mother Helen was six foot
even and her father Jack was two inches taller than Julie was at six
foot eight. Both sets of Julie's grand parents were tall as well so
being almost a giant was literally in her genes.
Ash and she teased each other about that because it was the same for
Ash. In Ash's case he was four foot four and while that was a little
too short for a Jockey he was strong for his size. He was a fast
runner but tiny legs even moving fast wasn't often fast enough.
Both he and Julie were at opposite ends of the spectrum giving them
nothing in common and every reason to be friends. It was Julie's
mother that encouraged that friendship since Julie had so few of them.
So too Ash and over a very short span of time Ash's occasional job
became part time because of Julie's father. The background check kept
expanding till the family knew it all.
THE PROPOSAL
"Go take care of Ash," Mr. Baker said looking up to see Ash walking
off. He was watching Ash and Julie separate. He knew as well as Helen
did that the key to their daughter's recovery was Ash. He also knew
that Ash's welling being was critical to Julie's well being. He took
the reigns from his wife to let her go.
He'd taken over the conversation with the man that wanted to stud the
horse freeing Ms. Baker who was about to walk back to the house. Julie
started running towards her father as Ash began making his way to the
Jockey's locker room. His part time job was at an end for that day,
but Julie's father has seen the brief argument between the two kids.
"Ash," Ms. Baker yelled as she half jogged towards Ash just before he
went into the locker room and added, "Come over and see me! Come and
have tea with me."
"Hey Ms. B," Ash said hiding his frustration, and using the nickname
she insisted on, as he ended his light jog to catch up with the owner's
wife. they were very well off this couple and kind to Ash. He liked
Helen a lot.
The silks he was now wearing, even the Dance Skins he had on under them
that Rose had given him for the ride today were free. Generous
considering he wasn't even close to being an apprentice yet.
"Oh hey Mrs Baker thanks for the silks," Ash said.
"You're welcome Ash and don't forget Ash, it's Ms B if you don't mind,"
Ms. B said as she added, "Did Rose give you the new Dance Skins with
them? It was very chilly this morning?"
"She sure did. Nice and warm," Ash said without adding that under the
satin pants they really were silky and slippery as well. Julie was
right about that part. Julie was also right about the way the held the
diaper on as well.
Ash sat at the kitchen table feet well off the ground swinging his
legs. It was a habit he had yet to stop doing. It made him look very
juvenile one of the other jockeys in training warned. A curse for
jockey's the other guy had said.
The kitchen, Ash noted, was vintage but the house was modern, two story
with a third the attic, and new as was most of the compound. It took
Ash nearly twenty minutes to walk from the road in the morning after
the bus dropped him off just to get there after school
"So how are you getting on?" Helen asked.
"Are you kidding? This is great," Ash said.
"So, it's going to work out then?" Helen asked cautiously as she added,
"And you're going to keep us?"
"Yes ma'am," Ash said.
"Okay if I ask these questions. I usually check in with the new kids
just to make sure they're settling in," Helen said.
"Not a problem," Ash said.
"Great. Ash, when we ran your background it said you were just
starting college? Is that true?" Ms. Baker asked.
"Yes ma'am, Freshman," Ash said and added, "Is that going to be a
problem Ms. B?"
"Absolutely not Ash," Ms. Baker said and added, "Truth is I'm glad to
hear that, and we can easily adjust your schedule."
"I'm good. I'll keep my mornings clear for the runs. Ms. B, can I ask
you something else? It's about Julie," Ash said and then quickly
added, "She knows about my diapers."
"Ash, she knows about your diapers because I also know about the
diapers," Helen said and added, "She's part of this enterprise and does
a lot of my paperwork. So she's bound to come across most all of the
sensitive information."
"It's just that she's teasing me about them," Ash mumbled.
"Actually... Ash, there is a reason I'm going to say that's a good
thing, but I'll need to fill you in on some things first," Helen said
and then added, "Can I do that first?"
"Yes ma'am," Ash said and added, "I guess so."
"It's going to require a few more rather personal questions," Helen
noted.
"Okay," Ash said.
"Thank you, and since we're on that subject, and again I don't mean to
pry but can I know how you came to decide to wear those diapers instead
of using catheters after the accident?" Helen asked.
"It's really hard to talk openly about this stuff Ms. B," Ash said.
"I know, I know, but I really do have my reasons for asking, and I hope
you'll trust me enough to share this with me," Ms. B said.
"Well, truth is it's because of infections. I got two of them during
my rehabilitation. One right after the other. Both times I had to
wear diapers while I took the antibodies," Ash said.
"Infections? Two? That must have been rough," Ms. B said.
"It was. That last infection was what landed me back in the hospital
again. When it happened the second time I just never went back to
those damn catheters. Tell you the truth, I didn't see all that much
difference standing over a toilet to empty a damn bag every couple of
hours or changing into and out of a diaper," Ash said.
"Now that you mention it, I guess it makes sense in a way," Ms. B said.
"That's what I'm saying. A little more money I guess. But if you
think about it six of one half a dozen of another. To be honest once I
was past the embarrassment of wearing diapers it kind of got easier
actually," Ash said and added, "Once I found out just how easily I fit
into... you know the smaller diapers with the single tapes it get even
easier and a whole lot cheaper."
"You mean the baby diapers?" Ms. B said.
"Actually, Ms. B they are toddler diapers," Ash corrected her.
"Sorry. I meant toddler diapers. So if you don't mind Ash tell me
about the styles and sizes?" Helen asked.
"Why do you want to know that?" Ash asked.
"Again, Ash it's important and I'll explain after you tell me, if
that's okay," Ash said.
"It's kind of embarrassing Ms. B," Ash said.
"It's really going to be okay Ash," Ms. B said.
"Okay. Let's see? I can wear a size 5T. The sizes go by weight but
it's also the length or rise," Ash said.
"Rise?" Helen asked.
"Yes ma'am, the rise," Ash said and added, "It's measured where the
edge of the diaper is supposed to hit right at the small of the back
and the front hits just below the belly button."
"Got it," Helen said.
"So a 5T is 'T' for Toddler size diaper that will fit kids with a waist
size to twenty one inches. It's actually that rise, which is the
length that makes the difference. Knowing those sizes makes wearing
toddler diapers a lot easier buying them. Plus, like I said, the
single tape style is a lot easier getting on and off," Ash said.
"Do you ever wear cloth diapers?" Helen asked.
"Actually I had just started wearing cloth at night," Ash said and then
added, "At foster care. But that ended."
"So you must have also started wearing those with plastic pants,
right?" Helen asked.
"Yes. It was the same thing size wise," Ash said and added, "I mean I
can wear the Large Toddler cotton Birdseye diapers with the 5T plastic
vinyl pants. Fortunately my foster mom, at least when I was living
there that is, bought most of the stuff in bulk over at Big Lots
because about half her kids wear the same things.
"So if I'm understanding you, it is cloth at night? Sorry, cloth under
plastic pants and disposables during the day. That sort of thing,"
Helen asked.
"Pretty much," Ash said but then added, "Or was. Kind of hard now that
I'm here."
"I understand," Helen said as she added, "And when you are out and
about. do you carry a diaper bag," Helen asked.
"Ms. B, you're teasing me right?" Ash asked.
"Actually No, I'm asking? Seriously? I mean how do you travel with
extra diapers?" Helen asked.
"Backpack! As if! Ms. B, you seriously think I'm going to be running
around with a baby's diaper bag?" Ash asked.
"Now that you mention it? No, I guess not," Ms. B said and then
stopped for a second and asked, "So aside from the size advantage, are
there any favorite brands for the disposables? Again I'm not trying to
pry, it's just that I've got an idea and I'd like to know as much as
possible before I say anything about it."
"Seriously?" Ash asked and added, "You're really asking me that?"
"Seriously," Helen said and she too added, "Please, go on, I've got my
reasons."
"Okay. I guess the ones I favor are the Swaddlers from Pampers. Those
are size 5. They are the softest which means the most comfortable. I
think my next best brand is the Huggies because they have a good double
grip tape and I can wear either the size 5 or 6. Although I like the
size 6 when I need a soaker added which is when I think I'm going to be
out awhile without a change..." Ash said and suddenly paused.
"What? Why did you just stop?" Helen asked after a moment.
"Ms. B this is really difficult. The thing is I'm talking about
toddler diapers and I'm an 18 year old guy," Ash said and added, "You
know, bad enough me being as small as I am but me in diapers that fit a
toddler makes it worse?"
"I know and I'm sorry poking into your life like this Ash," Helen said
looking desperate as she added, "Look Ash, it really is important.
Like I said it's serious or I wouldn't press like this."
"It's just that I'm talking about oh what the hell Ms. B... Okay, so
I'm talking about baby diapers? Baby diapers and I'm not a baby, but
yes I wear them. Gets kind of embarrassing talking about your favorite
baby diapers if you know what I mean," Ash said.
"Yes I do know what you mean. Honestly Ash, it's okay. Please, you've
got to trust me, go on, finish the list," Helen said and added,
"Really, it's okay."
"Fine. Where was I? Let's see? Right! So I stopped with Huggies.
Huggies too has the single tapes like the Pampers, but they have double
grip tape is good. Those are very good. Then there is the Walmart's
Parents Choice Overnights. Those overnights are super absorbent, and I
really like their Cloud Premiums. Those too are good, but I guess my
overall favorites are the Lov's Ultra with their Leak guards," Ash said
and paused.
"Leak guards?" Helen repeated and added, "What exactly are leak
guards?"
"Those leak guards go around the edge of the legs. Seriously, they are
a real plus. Okay, they look a little like ruffles, which is a little
odd when you see them on, but if you ignore the girlish look those
ruffles add a little more insurance," Ash said and then added, "I guess
that's about it for the disposables."
"Do you ever wear any of the adult brands?" Helen asked.
"I do! I mean I did that is, but not as much as you'd think. Too many
good baby diapers. Some of the adult brands have small sizes but they
are all double tape and are really just smaller versions of the adult
styles," Ash said as he added, "Trouble with the adult brands is that
most have no material around the sides like the baby diapers do."
"Sounds like you got here from lots of experimentation," Helen said.
"Actually no! I mean yes, in the beginning, but it wasn't as
complicated as it seems. When I was going through my first infection
battle, one of the nurses actually helped. She was already up on
diapers for her own kid. She had a chubby toddler," Ash said and
added, "She was helping me into one of the hospitals really ugly green
diapers right at the beginning, you know, for me to use for the trip
home when she told my foster mom about Walmart's Cloud brand.
"That must have been difficult laying there listening to that," Ms. B
said.
"Very painful because she was diapering me at the time," Ash said and
added, "But she was also telling my foster mom about how cheap the
Cloud diapers were compared to the medical ones and definitely more
comfortable and that's were we started."
"So you actually started with the cloud diapers?" Ms. B asked.
"That afternoon when I needed to be changed," Ash said and added,
"Luckily my foster mom was already buying diapers for the other kids.
She had two toddlers anyway, and actually switched brands that day.
She saved a ton of money."
JULIE AND JANET
"Can I ask you a question Ms. B?" Ash asked.
"Of course Ash," Helen said as she poured hot water over the tea bags
she put into the cups.
"So, is this about Julie?" Ash asked.
"It is Ash," Helen said and added, "You know they like you, don't you?
A lot.
"I get that," Ash said and then, after a sip of tea said, "truth is I
like her to. Ms. B, but I need to ask, how come she said we and us and
even you say they when you talk about her?"
"That's just it Ash and why I'm asking you so many questions. Okay,
this is where we need to be able to trust each other a lot. More so
with what we're sharing Ash," Helen said.
"Well, Ms. B, if you don't mind me saying this, you pretty much know
all of my secrets," Ash said.
"Fair enough Ash," Helen said and added, "And so here is ours! Ash,
the thing is, if you haven't already guessed, Julie has another
personality. A twin if you will and her name is Janet. Janet and
Julie are separate but equal and just as obvious both are sharing the
same body. Together they have what is known as a multiple personality
disorder."
"Really," Ash said and then asked, "So that's why you and she say us
and we then.
"It is," Helen noted.
"So, I suppose Julie knows about Janet and Janet knows about Julie?"
Ash asked.
"Yes and no," Helen said and added, "It's complicated because both
personalities are shared qualities surfacing with the other allowing it
and aware that it's happening. Although I was told long ago that it's
very rare for that to occur. Truth is I've named them for my
convenience, but I'm not sure they actually care that they are
separate."
"Okay, so that explains a lot," Ash said and then asking, "Do you know
why they split?"
"No, we,that is my husband and I, don't know what caused it, or even
how it came about, but we think it began when she was six or seven near
as we can tell," Helen said and added, "We've tried for a few years now
to find out."
"Must be difficult," Ash said.
"It's was for a long time," Helen said.
"Was?" Ash noted.
"Was," Helen said excitedly and added, "That's why I've been asking so
many questions and why this is the most important thing to me..."
"What's that?" Ash asked.
"Ash, you're actually the first person in all of these years that both
personalities have connected with," Helen said and added, "And we think
first it's because of your size, but we also think it's actually
because of the diapers."
"My diapers," Ash said.
"Yes," Helen said and added, "I saw it that first time she was looking
over the report. She kept flipping pages. Casually at first then
almost frantically.
"That is odd. I'm not sure I understand why my diapers connected, but
I'll say this, she is definitely keen on the diaper part, and little
girl dresses for some reason," Ash said, paused and then added, "Wait?
So it's not Julie when she's talking about the dresses is it? When
she's talking about the dresses she's Janet right?"
"That's exactly right Ash and that's what I mean about the connection.
I knew Julie was drawn to you over the diapers, but when I heard Janet
was as well that's when I got really excited. So yes, you seem to have
brought those two personalities to the surface and it seems you've
brought both out at the same time," Helen said.
"And you don't know why that is?" Ash asked.
"Ash, I don't know much about the split personality, but I remember the
girls when they were little. Julie was always into the babies and
dolls and being a mommy. Looking back I know now that Janet was the
princess type and into playing dress up. She loved the frilliness.
That's how I started to recognize the two different personalities when
they were younger. That's also what I noticed about them again just
recently when you started bringing both qualities to the surface
again."
"So there really are still two: One is into diapers, the other into
frilly dresses?" Ash asked.
"It's a little more complicated than that but more or less that's how
they separate. Yes," Helen said.
"How complicated?" Ash asked.
"It's like I said earlier Ash, Julie is more into the motherly thing so
the diapers are more representative of babies I suppose, or in relative
terms her baby dolls. In Janet's case it would be the dresses she wore
back when she was your size now which, as I think about it, was when
she was a little girl," Helen noted.
"So if I'm hearing you correctly if I was dressed as a toddler girl
wearing a diaper then both personalities could relate," Ash said almost
laughing. He thought he was being funny or sarcastic.
"Exactly Ash," Helen said.
"Wait, what?" Ash said in surprise.
"Don't panic. Hear me out first," Helen said and added, "It's that
size part that also caught my attention. It took me a little time to
connect the dots as it were but I think I have. When I said we think
this all began when she was six or seven, it made me think back to
those days and I got to thinking about her, just as her, without the
names separating them. Then I got to thinking about her size then
compared to your size now!"
"But we're so different," Ash said and then added, "You know, Ms. B as
in me being male, and her being female."
"Night and day obviously Ash but hear me out. It's the size that's
suddenly driving Janet out. Julie first connected with you because of
the size then those diapers. Janet is connecting with you because
Julie is connecting and she too is now seeing the size as a plus,"
Helen said before adding, "It's more about her physically your size
then... as she was back then."
"I'm not sure I'm getting it," Ash said.
"Okay, try and understand this and please, again, don't panic. As I've
thought about this it suddenly occurred to me, and you're going to find
this hard to believe, but you and she, as she was then, are exactly the
same size," Helen said.
"What?" Ash said and added, "How is that possible?"
"Ash you've got to understand a few things for a moment. Back then she
was a little girl and size didn't matter, just age did. Ash, in her
mind... even as big as she was, she was a little girl. There were just
those kids who wore dresses and kids who wore pants," Helen said.
"Okay, I get that," Ash said.
"So she's remembering those times, and comparing then to these times,"
Helen said and added, "Obviously Julie was big for her age even then so
when I looked at her pictures I suddenly realized that she's the same
height then as you are now."
"So your saying my size triggered this recognition," Ash said.
"Exactly! Whatever it was that happened then, you've triggered it.
It's something from a time when she was the size you are now. You
being a boy or girl doesn't really matter to her. At least not to her
subconscious. It's your size that matters," Helen noted with
excitement.
"Okay, that's makes since I suppose. So what do you think it was?" Ash
asked catching on.
"Honestly I don't know what it is or how it connects but it does,"
Helen said and added, "Whoever or whatever it is it's very strong and I
honestly think you're the key to finding out. In fact, I think you are
the key to both sides of that same girl and I also know that this has
never happened before," Helen noted.
"So I'm in the middle of all this," Ash said.
"Exactly. So when we hired you there was Julie and we were more or
less happy because she had a friend. That was one of the reasons we
hired you. Then there was your diaper situation. That was great
because we thought that might help connect with her split personality
and it did. We could live with that and did," Helen said.
"That's when the teasing started," Ash said.
"Exactly. Then suddenly Janet awakens and, for Janet's side, it's the
dresses. Now both are awake and yes, there you are right there in the
middle? Ash, you're suddenly like this perfect therapeutic assistant
or better still, you're this perfect therapeutic doll for my daughter,"
Helen noted happily.
"I get the diaper part, I guess. I mean I can understand why Julie
might make that connection, but Ms. B I don't wear dresses. Never did.
Never been in one. Never even mentioned them," Ash said and then
added, "So if I don't wear dresses how is Janet ever going to connect
dresses with me,"
"Can I ask you this then," Helen said and then added, "Would you at
least be willing to help Julie by wearing the diapers more, how to put
this, more openly?"
"How would that work?" Ash asked.
"Well, I'm still working on that," Ms. B said.
"But you think it really help her seeing me in them?" Ash asked.
"I think it would. I really mean that, so yes," Helen said.
"I'm just not sure what I could do about it," Ash said and added, "Do
you think it would help if we had Julie here to talk with us about it?"
"I've been told no. Direct confrontation is not good because the
conflict is coming from a singular source while in this case the
recipient is really recipients and this dualities," Helen said before
adding, "If that makes sense?"
"I'm not sure," Ash said.
"The risk is exposing the wrong thing to the wrong personality," Helen
said and added, "Showing Janet your diapers when it's Julie that's
interested in the diapers would be bad. It could shock Janet into
closing down again."
"Oh, okay, I can see where that would be bad," Ash said and then added,
"So to be safe it would have to be both?"
"Exactly," Helen said and then added, "And I can imagine how that must
sound."
"Scary," Ash said.
"Then I need to ask you for Janet's and Julie's sake as well. Janet
too needs your help in much the same way as Julie does. Ash, you've
connected with Julie, now I need you to connect with Janet in the same
way if possible," Ms. B said.
"Ms. B, if I could I would, but I don't know if I can," Ash said.
"Then let me ask you this? If you could, would you be okay with
helping Julie?" Helen asked.
"Definitely," Ash said and then added, "I mean if there was a way to at
least help her yes, I would."
"Ash, that's why I've got to ask you this and this is truly the most
important question I've ever asked of anyone: If you knew there was a
way that you could help Janet as well, would you be willing to help her
also?" Helen asked.
"I guess the answer is yes, of course I would, but how would I be
helping?" Ash asked and then suddenly he looked at Helen and started to
get a queasy stomach.
"Is it becoming clearer?" Helen asked.
He was remembering some of the conversation like gender didn't mater.
Julie liked diapers but Janet only likes dresses. He realized suddenly
what he was saying and then there was no doubt what he thought Helen
was asking.
"Are we talking about me actually wearing a dress?" Ash asked.
DIAPERS AND LITTLE GIRLS
"Great question Ash. So, that's the question? If I were to ask you to
wear a dress to see if it brought Janet out more would you be willing
to wear a dress," Helen asked and added, "Before you answer, remember
it would be private, between the girls and I and you and I'd make it
worth it. Well worth it."
"So you do want me to wear a dress?" Ash said.
"Yes I do. Diapers for Julie which you already wear, and wear a dress
for Janet," Helen said.
"But Ms. B, Janet likes the dresses she wore when she was a little
girl. She likes the dresses she wore when she was 6 or 7. That's right
isn't it," Ash said and added, "So if I'm understanding this that's
little girl styles dresses."
"Yes, that's right Ash," Helen said.
"Ms. B, if that's right then you want me to dress like a little girl,"
Ash said and added, "And wear a toddler's diaper under the dress?"
"Exactly," Ms. B said and added, "Diapers and little girl dresses."
"And you're sitting there expecting me to say yes," Ash said.
"Yes," Helen said and added, "But Ash, this is not without some
substantial encouragement and that encouragement comes out to be a
whole lot of compensation."
"Man I don't know Ms. B. Running around in a diaper is one thing.
Wearing a little girl's dress over it is a whole other thing. I mean
how would all this work?" Ash asked not believing he wasn't running
from the room screaming.
"Well, first of all would you be wiling to move in here with us," Helen
asked and then quickly added, "That's free room and board obviously."
"But I live here now," Ash said and added, "With the other hands."
"Obviously that would have to change. With the other ranch hands that
is. You'd move here into the house with us. You'd have your own room.
Private bathroom of course. You would live here with a new job," Helen
said pausing.
"Wait? So I wouldn't be a Jockey? What would I be then?" Ash asked.
"You would be connected with Julie's therapy. We're thinking of the
title Therapeutic Companion," Helen said and added, "It's not unheard
of."
"Sounds more like a companion doll," Ash noted with a slight distaste.
"You know about companion dolls Ash?" Helen asked.
"What's a companion doll?" Ash asked.
"When you said it sounds more like a companion doll," Helen said and
added, "I thought you knew about companion dolls?"
"I don't know what those are," Ash said.
"They were very large dolls. We use to buy them for Julie and Janet
because they are almost as big as you actually," Helen said and added,
"I just thought since you mentioned the name that you knew about them."
"No," Ash said and then added, "I just put the words together."
"Having seconds thoughts," Helen asked and added, "It's tough but Ash,
it's a chance I never thought I'd have."
"Are you kidding? Second thoughts? I'm having third and forth
thoughts," Ash said but then added, "Man I just don't know? What about
school?"
"School? Yes. Your days would be yours for school. Therapy or
therapeutic Companion would be after school only. Sort of like you
were doing in the mornings running the horses, but now you would be
working in the afternoons," Helen said, paused and then added, "Oh, did
I mention the Jeep? Sorry, that too. I'd give you a company Jeep to
commute in. No more busses."
"Wait a second, I get a jeep? Oh man! You really are going too fast?
I'd have a room with a bathroom? My own room with my own bathroom.
And a Jeep to drive to and from here? And I wouldn't be warming up
horses anymore but I'd be working? You said in the afternoon. And my
job is what Therapeutic? Or Therapy Companion?" Ash asked.
"We can work on a title," Helen said and added, "It was just something
to put on a W2 form.
"So how would I get paid?" Ash asked and added, "Would it be minimum
wage?"
"You'd be working two hours a day, roughly, and no you would not be
getting minimum wage. You'd be getting something close to what a
technician might charge. Not licensed fees obviously because you're
not a licensed technician but you are definitely doing the
extraordinary. That calls for extra ordinary pay. For that we could
manage say $75 dollars an hour. Say two hours or $150 a day? I could
manage that," Helen said and added, "While you're at your office that
is."
"I'm going to have an office," Ash said and then went silent and added,
"You're going to pay me $75 dollars an hour?"
"Yes. Ash, we were paying a damn therapist $500 an hour and after
thousands of dollars she didn't get within miles of where you got
within hours, so yes, I'm willing to pay you that much. And that office
is not really an office per se, more like a fixed space where the girls
would be comfortable talking with you. It would be more of a how to
put this? More like a play space I suppose," Helen said and added,
"Where you guys could have tea and be more like kids."
"Ms. B can you please tell me what it is I'll be doing for that $750
dollars a week in that office that's not really an office?" Ash asked
as he tried to imagine that much money.
"Better that you sip your tea Ash," Helen said and then added, "And
please call me Helen."
Ash took a sip of his tea, sat his cup down turned the handle a little,
put his hand in his lap and sat quietly.
"Ash. Since the girls were little and long before their problem
manifested itself the girls played in our attic. Their father, always
eager to indulge their whims spent a small fortune designing their
space so it was safe and entertaining. Over the years the space has
evolved but moving forward some of it has remained. There is one
particular part that traces back to those early days which we believe
is near the time when this manifestation occurred. I've had that part
opened again, cleaned and dusted and added to," Helen said and paused.
"Added to for my sake or for the girl's sake?" Ash asked cautiously.
"Both. As a matter of fact, when I began suspecting the time frame I
had Rose do some of the research to confirm some of my suspicions, and
aside from the goose bumps it's produced in me there is a re-Ashable
coincidence in what fits you up there," Helen said.
"I think I'm following you," Ash said.
"Most everything the girls wore back in the day has either been given
away, re-purposed or if it was truly special put into storage. We
couldn't even remember all of it. Rose has spent the past few days
pulling things out of storage and airing them. I was actually
surprised what was kept. Lots of fancy things," Helen said and then
added, "Rose did a little shopping for the rest."
"So it possibly fits," Ash asked not sure if he wanted to know or not.
"When Rose made your silks she got your measurements and did some
comparisons. The answer is yes. Surprisingly well as it happens. Now
here me out before you jump up and head for the hills. Given what I've
discovered, I believe that's a plus and with just a little interaction
between you and Julie you can most likely discover fairly quickly what
happened to Julie that cause her to create Janet," Helen said.
"And I do that how?" Ash said although he suspected he already knew
that "how".
"First by doing what you already do and that is just wear your diapers.
You wear your diaper and let Julie take it from there. I suspect once
you two start interacting up in the play area she will supplement by
first adding the baby stuff, then as Janet emerges the dresses will
come out," Helen said.
"Wait? Baby stuff? What baby stuff?" Ash asked.
"Remember, Julie was attracted to the diapers mostly because of her
dolls. Some of her larger companion dolls she has she used actual full
size baby accessories so I suspect she will introduce you to those
accessories. Truth is Ash I don't really know and I'm being stupid
here because I'm scaring you. I'm sort of winging it here. That will
be up to Julie. What I'm hoping is for your cooperation," Helen said
and added, "Your complete cooperation and I'm not helping by
speculating."
"It's just that... I mean it's a great offer and don't get me wrong Ms.
B, Helen, I like Julie and all, but man," Ash said and added, "But this
has got to be the weirdest job any guy has ever considered, bar none."
"But you'll do it?" Helen asked.
"I guess I'll at least try it. To be hones, I'm already wearing
diapers," Ash said looking desperately lost as he added, "It's going to
be the dresses."
"Those dresses are what I hope will draw out and make Janet comfortable
and appear. The environment I'm talking about is like a play house.
You've got a baby space and a play space with a table with chairs.
That play table gives you and the girls, along with a couple of large
companion dolls, a place to have tea in your dresses," Helen said.
"So how do you think this thing goes?" Ash asked.
"I think I'll leave it up to you and Julie to define which I suspect
will be mostly Julie. She's the dominant," Helen said and added, "If
you don't mind you can start today when Julie gets home. I think I'll
invite Julie to show you the attic when she gets here."
"So do we just talk?" Ash asked.
"Ash, like I said, I'm winging it here. Let's take it one step at a
time and do what ever Julie decides she wants to talk about or perhaps
do. Should Janet emerge then let that happen as well," Helen said and
added, "Can you do that?"
"In for a penny, in for a pound," Ash said and added, "But for what
you're giving me I guess I can repair my ego fairly easily."
"Then we're good to go," Helen said.
"What about hair? Stuff like that?" Ash asked.
"I'm going to leave that up to the girls," Helen said and added, "If
they want you in a wig, I'd like you to wear a wig. If not, I'm okay
with that as well. Mostly I'm okay with whatever gets them comfortable
with you and them talking. Okay?"
"You know she's been teasing me about the Dance Skins and her dresses
fitting me and even seeing my diapers! You know that right?" Ash said.
"I've had my suspicions. I means she's hinted at it. Especially the
diapers and then suddenly there is Julie talking about the dresses.
That's what started all of this investigation. Ash, I know for a fact
there is something there," Helen said.
"Helen, there is something else as well," Ash said with a new blush to
his face as he added, "It's about Julie mostly."
"What about Julie?" Helen asked.
"I'm saying that Julie is talking about sex sometimes," Ash said and
added, "I mean what if she gets serious about sex?"
"Ash, she's eighteen, you're eighteen! Frankly it's none of my
business if that's what you are asking," Helen said and added, "Are you
bringing it up because it might be a game changer for you? I mean is
it a plus or as a minus because she's so pushy or what?"
"Ms. B? You're kidding right? I'm four foot four. If you want to
know the honest truth, I don't have sex with girls! Not in real life.
Which means Julie hinting at sex is.... well Ms. B, to be honest, it's
a turn on," Ash said and added, "Ms. B.... Helen, I'm not trying to be
insulting because I'm going to say it's a plus but I would not want to
be shot by your husband either. I mean after all, he's a dad."
"I understand Ash," Helen said fighting desperately not the snicker as
she added, "So does that mean you're okay with the dresses? Sex not
withstanding?"
"No. Absolutely not! Yes? I mean sort of. Maybe I guess, if that's
something your daughter wants then so do I. I guess I wouldn't object!
Helping your daughter is something I've agreed to do. If sex is part
of it, I'm definitely okay with that. No matter what causes it," Ash
said and added, "It's just that I didn't want to ruin a good thing."
"If this helps my daughter become whole again I too am for it," Helen
said and added, "So do you want to see your room perhaps, then maybe
the jeep?"
"That would be awesome," Ash said.
THE PLAY ROOM
"You know I think it would be to," Helen said standing. She put both
cups into the sink as Hazel came into the kitchen as if on cue which
allowed Helen to add, "Hazel, will you tell Rose that we're going to
see Ash's room, then take a stroll to see his Jeep and then come back
and get a glimpse of the attic."
"Yes ma'am," Hazel said as she begun cleaning the coffee cups. Hazel
stopped cleaning, wiped her hands on a dish towel and turned to walked
off through the back door as Helen led Ash through the front part of
the kitchen.
"Wow," Ash said entering his bedroom. What struck him first was the
walk in closet and a new set of stairs built like steps. It was like
something you'd see for boarding airplanes but obviously not as big as
Ash added, "Have those always been here?"
"No, those were added yesterday after I asked that they be built.
There is a company that accommodates the handicapped. They pivot slide
and lock so all you've got to do is move it by the handle and climb the
steps, they slide along the entire closet," Helen said showing Ash how
they worked.
"Impressive," Ash said as he started to enter the bathroom and froze.
On the counter was a package of Lov's disposable diapers, a canister of
Johnson and Johnson's Baby Powder, Baby Oil, Baby Shampoo and what
looked like a gift package of other baby products like baby soap and
wash rags. There was also a package of unopened cloth diapers and a
package of four plastic vinyl baby pants that Ash had only mentioned
once to Julie as he added, "You've got to be kidding?"
"What?" Helen asked.
"Good heavens," Ash said ignoring Helen's question.
"I've forgotten something? Name it and I'll have it here before you go
to bed," Helen said nervously.
"No, everything is wonderful. I was just shocked is all. I wasn't
expecting all of this," Ash said.
"Wonderful. I've duplicated the disposables and clothe diapers plus
those baby pants... sorry, plastic panties in the attic as well. I put
them in with the other doll stuff just so you don't get blind sided by
them when you see them," Helen said.
"Unbelievable," Ash said before adding, "There are things here I've
never had. Just so you know. Which by the way gives you an A for the
effort. Thank you for the attempt to make me feel at home, and a
little scared."
Ash didn't want to say there was way too much baby stuff in his
bathroom but that package of cloth diapers and four pack of baby pants
were a bit much. Knowing they were also up in the attic made him a
little uncomfortable because he knew that as soon as Julie saw those
things she'd zero in on them.
"Fire Engine Red," Ash said looking at the crimson brightness shining
in the sun as one of the Ranch hands was putting the finishing touches
on the tires with a tire spray.
It was exactly as Ash had hoped including extensions on the break and
gas below the steering wheel that allowed him to easily sit on the
newly raised seat. It would not eliminate a police officer's
curiosity, and he'd need practice, but he could easily and legally
drive it. Included with the documentation was the paperwork for his
handicap certificate. It nearly brought him to tears as he hugged
Helen for her efforts.
"If this brings happiness and closures to my girls, girl hopefully
singular, it would be worth ten times what I've spent so enjoy the
moment," Helen said.
"And I'll need to change first," Ash said blushing a little.
"Then why don't you go do what you need to do and I'll let Rose know to
make lunch and bring it to the attic. That way when Julie gets home
she can take you up and give you the tour and you guys can have lunch
there. Sort of break the ice as it were," Helen said.
"Thanks, I shouldn't take long," Ash said as he turned back for the
house and his new room and shower. It was luxurious. Whatever was
going to happen was easily becoming worth it Ash mused as the soft
spray of endless hot water cascaded over him. Not having to set a
timer like he did at the foster home was wonderful. He used his new
baby shampoo, soap and wash cloth to scrub himself clean.
Ash stepped down from the rubber steps and out of the shower and dried
himself with the white fluffy towel. That too was luxurious drying in
a bathroom you didn't need to lock as he carefully opened the Lov's
package and tugged one of the new downy soft diapers from the package.
As he always did he laid it open on the bed over an open towel filling
it generously with baby powder before laying over it. Once on top he
began covering himself in powder. His moves were practiced, as he
tapped himself perfectly into the diaper before grabbing and opening
the plastic vinyl panties. He stepped into the new baby pants and
found them happily a nearly perfect fit.
Considering that he'd be exposed he decided to wear the slightly opaque
plastic panties over the disposable for the sake of discretion. A lie,
but it sounded good should someone ask and he grinned.. Truth was he
liked that odd chemical smell and added crinkle and if he was going to
be in a dress he'd be without pants so the diaper and baby pants would
crinkle even more. No one needed to know he might like that.
Ash had taken the tee-shirt by accident months earlier and never
returned it only because it fit, but hung nearly to his knees. At
home, around the kids that knew he wore diapers for medical reasons.
He often went without his pants or shorts just for the thrill of
nothing more than a kind of dress. It wasn't a dress, but it was as
close as he dared and now he was heading directly out of his room to
maybe be put into one... on purpose.
Ash's heart began to race as he changed his shirt to one of his regular
ones and stepped into his regular pants and left his room for the door
at the end of the hall. Rose was just heading for the attic with the
tray of sandwiches, chips and sodas when she saw Ash.
"The attic is past your room to the end of the hall, through the door
at the end and up the steps to the door at the top," Rose said as came
up to him and waited for him to turn in that direction. They walked
with Ash slightly ahead. as Rose added, "Julie is already up there."
"Awesome," Ash said as he started to climb the steps.
Rose paused to watch Ash climb the front steps shaking her head slowly
at the tiny man that Julie had been smitten by. Julie had always had a
fondness for Jockeys, that much was clear when they caught her
attention the first time when her father started using the young ones
to warm up their horses. Rose smiled at the notion of what was about
to happen to this young man as he neared the top of the stairs.
Julie meanwhile was letting Janet select the rumba style panties that
went with the lavender dress, two hair bows for the braided wig, lace
socks with the lavender edging and of course the dress. Most of the
dresses were eight gore, normal for two petticoats but this was ten and
could take another petticoat easily. Ash, Janet had decided, would
wear three. The door handle rattled as Janet was sliding petticoats
aside in the newly refurbished room as the attic door creaked open.
"Hello Ash, I'm over here at the end," Julie said peeking around from
the rack of dresses and slips. Rose moved past Ash silently and
carried the tray of food and drinks to the table with the large dolls
and bears already sitting around it. A moment later without notice Ash
and Julie were alone.
"This place his huge," Ash said nervously. The attic, sitting atop the
house clearly ran the length of it but unlike a true attic was unto
itself another floor. The room had full side walls then roof joist and
beams. Instead of window there were gabled extensions built out from
the roof above down to another sloping roof to the next floor. That
dormer design accommodated vertical windows on both sides.
It gave the space another dimension given the width and length equaled
the house itself and allowed the space to be divided up into equal
spaces and Ash started noticing those spaces. The first obviously was
where Julie was and it looked like a damn boutique with racks of slips
and dresses. Julie was holding a dress and a slip. If that was the
dress she intended him to wear it was a bad omen and the slip itself
looked like another dress.
"I was getting things ready," Julie said.
"You're scaring me," Ash said passing what looked like a kitchen on one
side, his right side and to his left another make believe space that
was easily a nursery that made him stop dead in his tracks as he added,
"Has this always been here?"
"What?" Julie asked before turning to look where Ash was looking before
he added, "The nursery? Yes, I mean yes, it's always been there, but
Hank the carpenter just added the shelves for the diapers. Your
diapers. Is that what you're asking? Mom ordered the styles of
diapers you wear. She ordered the right ones I hope?"
Ash was looking at a baby's changing table, crib and cabinet complete
with a number of things Ash didn't want to actually consider but was
left no choice since they were glaringly apparent. Baby bottles, a
couple of packages of pacifiers. Even baby bibs with the cardboard
still stapled to them. All clearly purchased recently.
"If you're not seeing something that you'd like added, say so and I'll
make sure it's there," Julie said misinterpreting Ash's hesitation or
his relationship with her, he wasn't sure which. He was also not sure
what to say about it. He wanted to defend his manhood but that made
even him laugh a little considering he was wearing a Lov's diaper under
a pair of plastic panties and sure he was about to go into a little
girl's dress.
"No, everything seems fine," Ash said walking off to see another part
of the attic and hopefully change the subject.
"Oh, I think they did change the crib. It was a mini crib for the
dolls before this so Mom had Hank bring up a standard crib, but it's
been extended four inches. Two at either end so the crib bumpers sit
down around the mattress instead of on top. That mattress is 28 inches
wide by 52 inches long. I measured it when I was putting the plastic
sheet on. That should give you just enough room. If it's too tight
for your head and feet you might say something to mom," Julie said.
"Your mom didn't say anything about a crib," Ash said backing away from
it.
"So the crib is out," Julie said suddenly sounding very disappointed,
"NO! I mean no," Ash said suddenly worried he might be sounding too
negative. It was all happening so matter of fact for him. Julie
seemed to assume he was okay with everything without asking about any
of it. It was turning him off,"
"So the size is okay?" Julie asked.
"No. I'm mean yes. I'm four foot four so that's just right," Ash said
not wanting to discuss it at all. What the hell was he thinking. He
did not want to discuss a crib with this girl, and he wasn't sure it
was Julie that had picked the Ballerina sheets and bumper design - damn
this was getting weird. Thank you very much.
"It's going to be a cute place to play. Anyway, shall we give this
little outfit a try," Julie said hanging the dress up and fluffing the
slip.
"Don't you want to talk a little? Maybe have some lunch?" Ash asked.
"Ash, do you know how much I've wanted to see you in your diaper,"
Julie said and then added, "I'm not saying just your diaper but the
least you could do, at least for now, is let me take your shoes, socks
and pants off. I'm guessing the diaper you've got on is wet? Right?"
"A little," Ash said suddenly and terribly embarrassed as he added, "So
it would just be a diaper change then."
"Just a diaper change," Julie said and added, "But on the changing
table if you don't mind."
"Up there," Ash said looking at the changing table. It had been made
and was slightly bigger than you'd find for a baby and matched the crib
perfectly.
"Up there," Julie said bending to pull a disposable from the new
package now on the shelf below. It had been opened and now she was
patiently waiting with the thick white diaper in her hand as she added,
"Well?"
"Okay. Just need a minute," Ash said taking a breath before he moved
in that direction.
FIRST A DIAPER CHANGE
As soon as he was close enough and to his surprise Julie bent and got
her hands under his arms and easily lifted him off the ground. It was
as if he weighed nothing as she maneuvered him so he was sitting with
his legs dangling. She laid the diaper at his side and began removing
his shoes.
Each shoe got his sock and both went on the floor near the wall before
she slipped an arm under his legs. He had no time to ask what she was
doing till she did it working the logic of her move out as she laid him
long ways on the decorative mattress. Ash noticed then as Julie laid
him back that it was decorated with Unicorns in soft pastels.
He was thinking of that feminine aspect when the small belt on his
pants was released. He looked up at the ceiling trying desperately not
to react to the situation just as he began to react. His erection was
instant as Julie tug his zipper down before she eased his pants below
his baby pants and off. The look on her face changed instantly to
something akin to someone seeing something they've never seen before.
Julie paused.
"Oh God that is so cute," Julie said with both hands going to her mouth
as she added, "Even better than I'd imagined."
"I'm glad," Ash said not sure if he was being sarcastic or not. He
couldn't think of another thing to say as he laid there feeling about
as uncomfortable as he'd ever felt in his life.
Julie was like a doctor performing surgery as she deftly and so very
carefully eased her large hands to the very edge of the elastic around
Ash's waist. She was acting like he was made of the most delicate
china all of a sudden as she gently lifted the small elastic edge with
both hands before sliding them away from each other to the sides. With
the panties raised she brought them forward of the diaper.
It was a combination of her index fingers and thumb grasping the baby
pants while the other fingers went under his bottom to lift him
allowing the baby pants to slip along his bottom. She was changing him
without his help he realized. She hadn't said anything and he hadn't
made any attempt to raise himself when suddenly she lifted him slightly
so his panties came forward. It surprised him that she did that so
easily. She pulled his baby pants forward and down his legs, over his
feet and off with one smooth motion.
"There we go sweetheart," Julie said turning her attention back to
Ash's diaper but as she did so her right hand went to a shelf above
him. He was looking at her at first then followed the hand but just as
he did that it returned and teased a rubber nipple against his lips as
she added, "Suck on this for mommy honey."
Ash found himself suddenly kissing a rubber bulb rubbing against his
lips attached to a pink sparkling plastic stop that he almost fought
against. This was not going to be easy this being a therapy doll he
thought to himself as he relaxed his lips and allowed the soft rubber
to slid into his mouth.
Ash's baby pacifier went to the hilt and instantly his mouth began to
water and just as quickly he needed to swallow creating his first
sucking action. Clearly that pleased Julie who used a folded index
finger to brush his cheek before she bent to kiss him. At the same
instant he felt his cheek being stroked he felt her other hand gently
fall over the entire front of his diaper.
"So adorable," Julie whispered and added in the same voice as she
gently massaged his diaper, "So baby like."
The notion that this was not going to be easy vanished in the growing
sexual urge Julie was creating in her gentle massage over his diaper.
His erection, not perfectly aligned had his tip just off to the side
where her pinky was laying and the pad of that pinky was sliding
alongside his erection. His sucking action almost became feverish as
he looked into her face hoping to somehow convince her to continue.
"I know baby, I know," Julie said moving the pinky exactly as he
wanted. It was a weird comment considering he hadn't said anything but
she was doing it and as she reshaped her fingers she left little doubt
what she was doing to him as she added, "If my little sweet heart is a
good baby she gets her diaper rubbed. Baby likes her diaper rubbed
doesn't she?"
There it was? Nod yes and confirmed everything she suspects or lie,
Ash thought and then closed his eyes as the climax neared because he
was nodding yes. Oh yes he thought as he continued nodding and arching
his back to push against her hand. Julie bent to his forehead as she
squeezed just a tiny bit more to match the slight increase in her tempo
and in another instant Ash exploded shamelessly into his wet diaper.
He was feverishly nursing his pacifier right up to the climax till the
peak then stopped as the first wave his causing him to bite down. He
moaned against the pleasure sweeping over him as the first explosive
pulse swept him to a warmth darkness that was renewed by the second
pulse, then a third. Each less but pleasurable in the links that came
to the end.
"There we go," Julie said rubbing him a few more minutes after he fell
back against the table. She continued to rub as she laid there till
his breathing slowed. Ash didn't even notice he was still nursing the
pacifier as she felt the first tug of his soiled diaper and heard her
say, "Oh, oh, my baby is all wet."
Ash simply laid there a willing participant and set aside any remaining
protest as Julie went about changing her dolly and clearly he was her
dolly. There was no dialog other than a mommy to a baby and it was
very mommy baby like as she untapped his diaper, lifted his left leg,
then his right, then both to remove it from underneath. She pulled a
wipe and cleaned him, another then a third that went everywhere before
he was rubbed with oil.
That oil rub was glorious because she spent time around his testicles.
Lots of time and she made sure he knew she was teasing him with her
fingers when he opened his eyes and looked at the snickering smile.
With the oil done the first diaper went under and then the baby powder
and there was plenty of that starting well above where the diaper would
close. Like the oil there was teasing and finally when he was almost
on the verge of another erection she closed the diaper and pulled the
tapes sealed.
Julie helped Ash sit and he lost his shirt then but instead of helping
him up she had him lay back down again which he did without protesting.
"I'm going to let my sister finish," Julie suddenly said bending again
to kiss Ash's forehead before whispering, "Thank you".
"You're welcome," Ash said removing the pacifier first and suddenly
confused a little since Julie was still standing there.
NEXT YOUR LITTLE DRESS
"Let's put these on first then I'll help you with the socks and Mary
Jane's," Janet said coming over with the ruffled panties. It wasn't
really Julie's voice Ash noticed. It was slightly different and those
were not just panties. Ash moaned past the NOT just ruffled, nor just
panties. These were seriously girlish because they were satiny in two
layers of material then ruffled.
"Are there two layers?" Ash asked not sure how to act suddenly as he
took out the pacifier again. He was sure there was a switch because
there was a slight change in the voice and this was what he had signed
up for but those plastic line panties with the ruffles and little tiny
bow were unnerving.
"Yes! Hard to tell isn't it? The second layer is a shimmering nylon,
very silky. I love this fabric. Even now after all these years, but
when I was little I adored it. Touch it," Janet said handing Ash the
panties as she stopped bending to help him into them.
"Silky," Ash said. Ash hadn't intended to admire them, didn't want to
admire them, he was curious and only wanted them on to get it over with
as quickly as possible. Try as he might to ignore them they were as
silky as they looked. The ruffles were made of the same material but
gathered lace and it was the same around the legs. Incredibly girlish
and lined in plastic.
"Here," Janet said guiding Ash's foot into the openings. The plastic
panties part crinkled as he lifted his bare left foot into the panties,
then his right before Julie drew them over his baby pants. The fit was
striking. It was as if they were made for Ash and not Janet as she
added, "Twelve years old."
"Twelve years old?" Ash asked now holding the pacifier in his hand.
"These panties are twelve years old, I wore them as a little girl,"
Janet said.
"Amazing," Ash said doing the math as he added, "So you were still
wearing diapers?"
"Yes, I was six but still wearing diapers," Janet said.
"I'm eighteen and still wearing diapers," Ash said snickering as he
lifted himself to let Janet set the panties in place.
"And cute you are," Janet said.
"You just sounded like Yoda," Ash said laughing.
"Who's Yoda?" Janet asked.
"A great software programmer," Ash said believing neither Julie nor
Janet would know who Yoda was.
"First, Yoda was not a great designer my young Padawan. Unlike you, a
mere apprentice girl, Yoda was a Grand Master of the Jedi Order. Do
you think, because I serve girls that I would not follow Star Wars.
Now you, who dare to tease the woman in charge, must follow the fate of
all dumb boys who forget that girls truly are the masters of their
universe," Janet said as she burst out laughing before calming and
adding, "And do you know how many times I've had to watch the Star Wars
DVDs in this house?"
"Sorry," Ash said.
"Your apology is accepted Admiral," Janet said imitating Lord Vader's
voice with a couple of exaggerated breaths before adding, "Perhaps an
additional petticoat or two will teach you to not dismiss the feminine
force so readily next time."
"Good heavens, I've landed in a mad house," Ash said smiling as he
watch Janet lift the bouffant slip from it's hanger. Ash watched and
added, "I thought we were going to do the shoes and socks next?"
"I want you in all your layers first. It will be your punishment to be
encased in fluff while I put your shoes and lacy socks on," Janet said
smiling as she added, "And put that pacifier back in your mouth. I
want to see it bobbing up and down while I dress you."
The slip Janet had grabbed had a nylon top laced delicately around the
neckline and narrow straps with the neckline highlighted by a tiny pink
bow of satin. Below the satiny bodice and attached with a lightly
ruffled strip of ribbon was the petticoats starting with a taffeta
layer in three tiers. Each tier was slightly larger making the skirt
overall larger gathered at the waist to an exaggerated flair above the
knees when it fell over Ash's head.
Ash saw the underskirt and a lighter skirt of netting or tulle, he
wasn't sure what it was called when Janet lifted it over his head to
lower it when she had him lift his arms into the straps. It was a
decidedly girlish maneuver and he wasn't even sure he should drop them
when the slip cascaded down to rest on his shoulders. The top or what
he knew to be the bodice was short stopping the slip so it rested right
at his legs. It meant, if he guessed right that the slip would not go
very far past his ruffled panties.
Janet stopped and turned to move towards a mirror on a rack that was
fitted to wheels. It was been pushed against the wall near the day bed
that Janet moved closer. When Ash did drop his arms the slip, like the
panties, fit perfectly and in the mirror Janet now tipped a little it
was clear it only just cleared his panties. There was a lacy edge on
the top layer of taffeta which turned out to be the noisiest of the
layers.
"Can I ask a silly question?" Ash said taking the pacifier out again
and twisting as he sat there a little to see himself sideways in the
mirror.
"Of course," Janet said moving off for the dress but bypassing it for
another white petticoat of nylon and taffeta.
"Wait, before my question, how come you're adding that petticoat? I
thought you were kidding," Ash said.
"Nope. The first slip is to fluff the dress and most times is more
than enough, but for unruly boys a second slip is necessary sometimes
for punishment. This second slip my young Padawan is to punish you for
teasing me," Julie said as she gathered the slip over Ash's head again
as she added, "Now what was your question?"
"Okay, fine. Anyway, why do you girls want your slips to be so noisy?"
Ash asked.
"For our entrance, of course. And so you know what you are wearing.
These are girlish layers why wouldn't you want to know you're wearing
them," Janet asked, but then added, "Unless I suppose you're a boy and
was sneaking around and didn't want anyone to know you were wearing
them?"
"I'm part of that second group I guess," Ash said as he put his arms
straight up again for the second slip. Janet tugged it down to his
waist and spent a moment fluffing the even noisier skirts that settled
over the first. They too matched leaving Ash now wearing five layers
of slips and when he did lower his arms he actually laid them almost
straight out before allowing them to be buried within the layers of
petticoats as he added, "And remind me not to be mean to you ever
again,"
"I will," Janet said taking the dress up and removing it from the
hanger before adding, "But that may not keep you out of extra slips. I
think you look cute with all this fluff around you."
Ash watched in a kind of fascinated dismay as Janet gathered the skirts
to the unbuttoned bodice and gently lowered it over his head allowing
him a moment to slip his aims into the puffy sleeves that were gathered
by a ribbon of mint. That same shear color went around the waist in a
satin sash and in strips separating the tiers like the first slip he'd
been put into. The dress, like the slips was mostly white with those
hints of pastel green.
"I know I shouldn't ask this but how come my first dress isn't pink,"
Ash said as Janet fussed with the puffy sleeves first before she sat to
do the buttons at the back.
"You're a companion doll. That is to say, my favorite doll. Even
though you're diapered I had a favorite dress set to wear with my
companion doll and this was one of them. Janet had another, in red,
but this was the only set I could find in the boxes. You can dress the
doll while I do you're hair," Janet said.
"I'm dressing a doll," Ash said as he felt the sash tighten around his
waist. He also heard the taffeta swish as the fabric rubbed against
each other.
"Of course," Janet said and added, "With the exception that she's
getting a diaper under her panties like yours for Julie's sake. And
put the pacifier back in your mouth... remember, more bobbing from the
baby."
"Right," Ash said cursing himself for bringing it up.
"When we're done I'll show you how to gather all your slips and dress
so you can sit. Till then, let's get your shoes and socks on," Janet
said.
"Here, lift your foot," Janet said slipping a ruffled sock over Ash's
left foot, then his right. Unlike all the rest of the clothes Ash's
shoes were brand new. Janet tried not to laugh and was glad Ash didn't
ask but his foot was two sizes smaller than Julie's when she was that
size. Ash truly was a little girl's little girl as Janet closed the
single strap on his second shoe.
Ash looked every bit the sissy boy he was as Janet helped him down.
The exaggeration caused by the excess of slips from two petticoats
pushed the skirts of his dress almost straight out. If he allowed his
arms to fall within the folds of his dress they disappeared with only
the fingers of his hand appearing below the hem of his slips and
skirts. You could just see the very edge of his panties and last layer
of ruffles. With any movement at all the puffiness of his diaper
showed with the bounce of his dress, and if he bent forward at all the
other ruffles showed.
Janet took Ash's hand and had him move to the doll version of the
furniture before bringing the doll over.
"Here. This is her companion doll it's a Patti Playpal and this
version is 36 inches tall. I've got diapers for a 3T. It's in the box
with the panties, slip and dress. Shoes are in the bottom," Janet said
as she came over and handed Ash the large doll. She left and walked
the few feet and returned with the blond curly wig and a handful of
ribbons. The wig was already braided.
Ash, feeling his face flush and warming pulled the diaper opened and
laid the doll on her back as he tried to diaper the doll while Janet
fitted the wig over his head. Each paused for the other at moments and
finally the doll was diapered and Ash had blond banks and two huge soft
pastel green satin bows tied to two long brads.
Janet sat opposite Ash as he finished dressing his doll with the same
panties and dress that he wore which included allowing Janet a moment
to tie the two small ribbons into bows onto the two brads. Ash was
oddly aware of himself then and couldn't explain the reason for that
but when he stood his erection moved within the diaper and the tip,
already too sensitive reacted instantly.
Janet saw it first in his eyes as they half closed, then in his body
movements as he stiffened slightly in a pause. There was a momentary
tightening of the lips. The pacifier bobbing most of the time stopped.
All of it happening almost instantaneously and lasting only seconds but
she knew what had happened. Janet's little sissy lost it when he stood
with his dolly while his own dolly rubbed in his diaper. Janet, like
her other personality closed her eyes and let the pleasure sweep over
her. She too had an orgasm.
"So how's your diaper?" Janet asked when Ash opened his eyes again.
"What? Wait, what?" Ash asked suddenly feeling guilty as the waves of
pleasure washing over him had diminished. At first he thought Janet
knew but on thinking about it realized she couldn't so he was sure she
worried that he might be wet as he added, "I'm good."
"Looked to me like you might have wet again," Janet said snickering as
she added, "You also got a little stiff in the legs which I suspect
matched a little stiffness somewhere else as well."
"Okay, maybe a little," Ash admitted as he realized there was no way in
hell he could hide what had happened. He was holding the pacifier
again and suddenly looking at the food on the table as he added, "Can
you show me how to sit in these things so we can eat?"
Janet moved to the table, pulled the chair and executed the maneuvere
using her arms to gather an imaginary dress before sitting. She did it
again standing and executing that very move twice more for Ash's sake.
He mimicked the maneuver a couple of times till Julie was satisfied.
Janet had arranged the mirror so he was facing it when he sat as she
added, "And that is why little girls are taught to keep their legs
together."
Ash did not need to see that as he sat. The slips were stiff enough
that when those in the back were pushed against his legs they pushed
against the layers in front and while that was happening he sat with
his legs apart. What he saw was ruffled and lace panties puffed by a
fluffy diaper and plastic pants surrounded by layers of noisy slips
fully exposed to the mirror.
"Great," Ash said trying to bring his legs together as Janet started
off for the bib.
"Did baby mess his diaper again playing with my sister?" Julie asked.
"Julie? Or Janet?"
"It's mommy," Julie said.
It was the voice that told Ash it was now suddenly Julie as she moved
the mirror back so she could sit across from him to eat.
"Are you guys going to be doing this a lot?" Ash asked picking up the
sandwich to take a bite. In spite of what he was wearing and what had
happened so far he found himself suddenly ravenous.
"Looks that way," Julie said.
"Want to chance staying in dresses or would you rather change into a
fresh diaper and go a little more baby? Maybe get into a dress again a
little later?" Julie asked.
"What about Janet?" Ash asked and added, "Does she get a say in this?"
"Well, so far Janet is pretty happy with the way things are working out
and that goes double for me if I get to change you again," Julie said
and added, "Get it? Double, as in another diaper change?"
"I get it," Ash said smiling as he sat there.
"For me, Janet or you?" Julie asked.
"I'm a therapy doll. This is suppose to be for you and Janet," Ash
said and added, "So it's for you and Janet."
"Wow," Julie said and added, "Good for you Ash."
"I need to stop," Julie suddenly said and then added, "For Janet's
sake."
"Okay," Ash noted and then asked if she wanted him there or to change
and go back down stairs.
"Can you just go down stairs like you are for now?" Julie asked.
"I can," Ash said moving to the door. His wide dress rubbed both sides
of the wall taking the steps down. He made it to the kitchen.
"What now?" Ash asked of Rose.
Rose looked at Ash with a slightly puzzled look on her face.
VANQUISED
"I'm not sure Ash," Rose said and added, "I think it's only fair to
leave this one in Julie's hands to decide. Helen should be home very
soon."
"I'm a therapy doll, I think I'll stay down here till then," Ash said
moving to a kitchen chair and pulling it out to sit. It was awkward
holding the large doll and trying to sit while folding his skirts
inward and Rose smiled at his efforts as she came over to take the doll
for him. Ash gather his dress and slips and sat then took the doll
from Rose. He made the necessary adjustments so the doll sat across
his lap with her skirt adjusted just as prettily.
Rose was impressed with her little girly boy as she fused about the
kitchen. Fifteen minutes went by and the crunch of gravel hinted at a
car near the house as Rose moved to see before announcing it was Mrs.
Baker, Helen arriving. Ash girded himself for her reaction if any.
Helen came into the kitchen and literally dropped the bags she was
carrying with her. She stood there open mouth till Rose came over and
hugged her.
"Finally, I have someone to cry with," Rose said as Rose took Helen
into her arms. It was a gentle sob lasting only seconds before Rose
knelt to pick up Helen's purse and pull her hanky from it. Helen
dabbed her eyes and helped Rose pick up the rest of the bags contents.
Ash wasn't sure what to do but sit there and smile lamely till someone
spoke.
"I'm at a loss," Helen said, sitting with more force than she intended
and simply looked on for too long before she shook her head and paused
again, as she added, "I was hoping for a likeness, a character, maybe a
portrayal of those times that the girls might connect with. To be
honest I wasn't even sure I'd get that. But this? This went beyond
any of that... way beyond. You're the very essence of exactly what I'd
hoped for. Honey, you are adorable."
Ash, blushing was beside himself. He felt... He wasn't sure what he
felt. His body was surrounded by layers of girlish fabrics that he
could feel touching his knees, the small of his back, his shoulder
blades even the elastic gripping his arm that caused the silken layers
to touch his cheek when he turned his face, all sent signals he'd never
received before. All was feeding him information she was just
confirming. He was feeling adorable.
"You feel it?" Helen said.
"I guess I do," Ash said as he blushed from the look Rose gave him. He
suddenly knew what Rose knew. Rose had known what had happened
earlier. She knew he'd had an orgasm in his diaper when he was
dressing the doll and he had just shared that with Rose who smiled at
him that small secret they now shared together.
"Isn't it amazing what happens when we are pushed out of our shells and
into another," Helen said and added before Ash could respond, "Which is
what I hope happens when the girls see you."
"Me too," Ash said as he heard the gravel crunching under tires. His
stomach did more flip flops as he asked. "Will Mr. Baker be with
them?"
"No. We thought it would be better if Mr. Baker was not around for
such foolishness, at least not for the first few nights and he's
agreed. He's staying at the club for the week," Helen said as
footsteps sounded just at the porch.
"Mom, did you get to see ash," Julie said coming into the kitchen.
Helen didn't answer as Julie rounded the corner of the hall that led
into the large eating area where Ash was sitting. Helen went silent,
Rose was leaning against the swinging door and silent and Ash was
sitting there holding his doll. He too was silent. Julie walked in
and in that silence, looking suddenly confused added, "What's wrong?"
"Ash," Julie whispered and added, "It's still you right?"
She was positive it had to be him but there was clearly doubt? Even
the ever confident Janet had doubts. For the first time in years she
didn't take charge. Janet for the first time looked at her mother
confused and was willing this time to let Julie organize what would
happen next.
"Mom, I'm a little nervous," Janet's voice said.
"Me too honey," Helen said as she got up and walked over to hug her
frightened daughter. Helen's hands were shaking as she eased her arms
around Janet's shoulders and drew her against her as she added, "You
know you don't need to be afraid. We are all here to help. You know
that right?"
"Yes, I know that," Janet said and added, "He's cute. I knew he would
be," Janet said looking over Helen's shoulder at Ash as Ash looked up
at Janet and smiled. "Is he wearing his diapers? I wanted him to wear
his diapers with that dress."
"I'm not sure," Helen said.
"He is Janet," Julie's voice said and added, "Julie helped him dress.
So is his doll. She's wearing the same exact things as he is.
Actually that's not true. I'm punishing him a little. He teased me so
I made him wear an extra petticoat."
"You did," Janet said laughing as she added, "Ash, is that true? Are
you being punished?"
"I am," Ash said.
"Can you show me?" Janet asked.
"I can," Ash said standing. Ash put the doll in the chair and
carefully adjusted her so she was sitting before he turned back towards
Janet and Helen who were now standing together. "First she made me
wear the bouffant slip and then she added another petticoat because I
teased her when I thought she didn't know about Yoda."
Janet bent with her hands on her knees as Ash lifted his short dress
once then again gathering his first two layers of slips before doing it
again to gather all of the layers of slips. When he lifted all the
layers of slips Janet could easily see the panties and how puffed they
were by the diaper and plastic pants making her gasp.
"He's wearing diapers and baby pants. Mother he's wearing a diaper and
plastic panties under his panties. He's just like a baby girl," Janet
said as her voice began to break between Janet's and Julie's as she
added, "He is just like Bradford."
Helen looked at Rose who looked as confused as she was. It was obvious
both women began racking their brains trying to place anyone named
Bradford Julie slash Janet came into being near the time of those
clothes, Helen was sure of that. It was just at the beginning when she
and Jake and just finished the interior construction of the house and
Janet's large attic play room.
"Mom, can we go up and play?" Janet asked asserting herself back into
the room again. She was smiling at Ash. Oddly it gave Ash goose bumps
that smile as Janet made a point of saying, "And bring your little
dolly with you Ash."
"Go ahead honey," Helen said as Ash took up the doll.
Both Ash and Janet walked through the kitchen for the back stairs that
would lead them to the second and third stories. Janet reached the
steps but waited for Ash who turned to look at Janet. Ash's initial
reaction was to start climbing but he'd seen that look before. Janet's
smile this time was wicked making Ash hesitate. That's when Janet
picked him up as she might a child, doll still in his arms and began
climbing the steps.
Ash felt Janet's hand over his bottom at first before falling between
his thighs, her fingers wiggling, then slipping further between his
legs till they were between them far enough to cup him fully. The
thickness of his diaper, coupled with the growing wetness firming the
jell under the plastic panties and layers of silk and satin covered her
movements some but only some as he felt her massaging him. It had the
desired effect.
"What a pretty baby girl you make," Julie said while she added in
Janet's voice, "And a really cute little girl."
"So did I make you both happy?" Ash asked.
"We think so," Julie said as she added, "I'm going to change your
diaper right after Janet gets you off. If that's okay with you?"
"Remember when mother wanted to know why we wanted the dolly scarfs,"
Janet said tugging a square scarf from the dresser. It was full of one
foot square scarfs neatly folded as she pulled a pink one from one of
the stacks. She laid the scarf on the changing table next to where she
had sat Ash before putting his doll at the tea time table. "Night time
or regular diaper Ash?"
"How long are we going to play tonight?" Ash asked fluffing his skirts
and slips as Julie went to the new shelves with the stacks of diapers
as he added. "I can last for a time in the Pampers, size 5."
"Pampers size 5 it is," Julie said moving over the packaging. There
were two packages Ash suddenly noticed and Julie opened the second
clearly for girls.
"Why, you've got girl's version for all of them," Ash said as he looked
over the shelves.
"This is a girl's play area Ash and you are dressed as a girl," Julie
said in her voice which was joined by Janet's which added, "Including
sissy boys wearing girl's clothes."
"We could never decide could we," Julie said before adding, "And it
always seemed so simple: Dress them as babies or as little girls?
Diapers or panties? Put them in diapers and you can only just feel
that pounding erection Julie said. While on the other hand, Janet
noted, putting them in panties makes them easily touchable but so
terribly messy. Such excruciating pleasure."
"How did you decide Ash?" said as Julie laid him back and began undoing
his sash and buttons at the back of his dress.
"That's just it, we never could. We'd bring boys up here, tease them
out of their clothes and as soon as we would start trying to decide to
diaper them or put them in panties things would start to unravel.
Before you know it the boy is dripping and there I am trying to stop it
with a scarf and the best I can hope for is he gets off and I watch in
frustration as all the fun goes off in a silk square."
EVOLUTION
"So how did the two of you evolve then?" Ash asked as his dress came
off over his head. He was sad to see it go. Sadder still when the
taffeta petticoat followed and nearly heartbroken when she lifted the
bouffant slip went back on the hanger leaving him just in his panties,
baby pants and diaper. He did feel girlish swinging his feet with the
ruffled socks and Mary Jane's but it wasn't the same without the dress
and slips.
"Lay back precious," Julie's voice ordered gently pushing Ash to lay
back on the changing table. Ash did so as Julie began removing his
panties while she talked, "I more or less stayed with the diapers.
Always were my favorites on boys so when we got one up here, I more or
less got them into diapers no matter what. The thing was, I found out
if I got them off in their diaper and then dressed them as little girls
they could almost last till I finished so that kept the Janet side of
me happy and the panties almost dry."
"But why two personalities?" Ash asked as Julie tugged on his baby
pants.
"I don't know," Julie said and suddenly added as Janet, "Yes you do?
Remember? Every time we went to the therapist we learned a little more
about the disorder and what a split behavior looked like and pretty
soon we were experts at it. Come on, you've got to remember how
excited we got? Couldn't wait for the next episode? Then we'd rush
home and find some poor boy to experiment on?"
Ash laid there as Janet and Julie switched back and forth in this duel
argument as he got his wet diaper changed. It was a thrilling ride as
one or the other, he was never sure which peel back his wet diaper,
pulled a wipe to clean him and then took up the silk scarf to start
masturbating him. He was slightly shocked over the turn of events as
the girls continued arguing while he just laid there getting off under
Janet's or Julie's hand using that silk scarf.
Ash was just on the verge of a massive orgasm when they stopped.
"Diapers or little girl?" Julie asked.
"Why did you stop?" Ash asked grunting his displeasure over the painful
realization that he'd just been left hanging.
"She asked you a question? Diapers or little girl? Do you want to be
a baby girl or a little girl," Janet asked and added, "What happens
next for you is critical to how you answer?"
"What do you mean how I answer is critical?" Ash asked suddenly fearful
of the look he was getting. He still wasn't sure which personality was
in control but the hand still had hold of him under the silk scarf and
while he was growing soft within the confines of the silk wrap he was
getting scared.
"One of the answers is right, one of the answers is wrong! Give the
right answer and life becomes a series of pleasures the likes of which
will leave you begging for more. Give the wrong answer and you'll be
begging for it to end long before it ever will. Now then, Diapers or
little girl?" Julie or Janet asked as she tightened her grip around
Ash's penis.
"Why can't I have both?" Ash asked almost wincing at the risk he
thought his question posed. He wanted his diapers, needed his diapers
and found that he loved the dresses and slips. He could easily be a
little girl 24/7.
"You are such a sissy baby," Julie said bending down as she slid her
left hand down the softened penis that suddenly started to grow again.
Julie spit slightly wetting Ash's tip as Ash felt a finger of her right
hand wiggling into his bottom. His reaction was immediate as Julie
removed the scarf and laid her hand flat over Ash's stomach while her
mouth slid slowly down his erection. She committed herself to oral sex
and his prostate massage for the next few minutes till Ash
involuntarily arched his back and forcefully went rigid in the throes
of his orgasm. She drew him long after he'd gone soft and then used
baby wipes.
"What was that about?" Ash asked and added, "Not that I'm complaining
mind you."
"Jessica honey. The mommy!"
"Wait? What? Now who's Jessica?" Ash asked.
"Me precious. Now spread your legs and lets make you a proper baby
girl and find you something to wear till I can get a rise out of the
little penis again," Jessica said running her palm gently over his
flaccid member.
"Oh my goodness," Ash said as he jumped a little. He was flaccid
perhaps but he wasn't insensitive and his tip reacted to her touch
making her smile as she opened the princess covered diaper as Ash
added, "Have I created a monster?"
"Nope, a mommy and for now the only thing standing between sugar and
spice and everything nice is this little girl's diaper. Now lift your
bottom," Jessica said and then added, "And thank you for helping me
find the door. I knew it was around here somewhere, just needed my
little therapy doll to lead me to it."
"So are you really Jessica or just another personality like Julie and
Janet?" Ash asked.
"Precious, if I knew that I'd be the therapy doll. It just fits for
the moment but it does fit and when I looked down at the little
erection of yours and those shelves full of diapers, I knew I wanted to
be your mommy and a naughty one at that," Jessica said bending down to
kiss his penis as she slid the diaper under him as she added, "Now,
does that feel like a monster? And would it matter if this is a new
personality?"
"No! On both counts," Ash said.
"Good, now lets get you into your fluffy little diaper and then find
you a pretty little dress to wear over a nice silky slip and see if
that doesn't make you at least feel like a little sissy baby," Jessica
said tugging the diaper between Ash's legs. Ash happily eased his legs
apart allowing the flat of his feet to touch so he could force them
even further as Jessica worked the diaper between his thighs before
adding, "How many people know you don't really need your diapers?"
"What?" Ash said suddenly shocked back from the bliss he had begun
drifting into.
"When mom and dad ran their background check on you, you know, after
your employment check they got the doctor's report, for the insurance
carrier and it said there were no lingering medical issues. Mom
checked, twice actually, and the investigator even did an onsite check
with the out patient clinic that said you were in diapers and you did
suffer two infections but you got past both. Same with the diapers,"
Jessica said.
Ash laid there as Jessica continued taping him into the girlish diaper.
He was silent. Desperate to confess but not sure what he could say or
even how to say it. When the second infection was pronounced clear,
even after he'd stretched it past a reasonable time he hated giving the
diapers up.
He'd gone back to the foster home and sadly sat at the kitchen table
and lied, telling his foster mom that he was stuck wearing them for a
time. His foster mom even told him it would be their secret telling
him she'd keep a few under the sink so when he went in to shower they'd
already be in the bathroom. It had worked.
"Why did you play along?" Ash asked.
"Are you kidding? Ash, I like you in diapers. I like the thought of
you fitting into those plump in the front, fluffy to the touch, padded
in the back, waddle-y cute baby diapers," Jessica said.
"So why now?" Ash asked getting hard from the images Jessica was
creating from her talk over his diapers. He liked them for all the
reasons she cited.
"Because now I need you to sometimes be my serious baby and I don't
need you hesitating when I put a baby's bottle nipple against your
lips. I want you to let it slide in and for you to start sucking on
it. Period. You're going to be my baby at times and that's that.
Understood?" Jessica asked.
"Yes," Ash said as he watched Jessica walk to where the baby bottles
and pacifiers were. She opened a package of pacifiers and removed one
before returning.
"Here, try this on for size," Jessica said pushing the soft brown
rubber nipple against his lips. Ash didn't hesitate and allowed the
rubber tip into his mouth as Jessica playfully jiggled it all the way
into his mouth while palming his diaper as she added, "Yes! Now that's
my little girl."
"You know I'm not a girl right?" Ash said removing the pacifier from
his mouth to talk.
"You're right," Jessica said pushing his pacifier back in as she added,
"And if you remove that pacifier again I'm going to tie it in with a
ribbon, okay my little sissy boy?"
Ash nodded thinking girl sounded a tiny bit better than little sissy
boy as she had him sit. She removed his hair bows and then the wig
before taking up a hair brush to brush his hair. His hair wasn't that
long but he got a decent part out of it and so did Jessica as she
divided it down the middle. She came back with two baby spring loaded
hair clips that she slid from the front. Each had plastic ballerinas
in twirling poses on them.
"Makes you look more sissy this way," Jessica said turning away to walk
down towards the dress racks as she added, be right back. Ash watched
her thumbing through the rack of dresses till she found one. Ash
thought it was a blouse at first only because it was so short but it
turned out to be a dress with no waist and for that one she added a
slip of nylon in the same style.
"Panties," Jessica said going to the low dresser as she opened a drawer
and brought out a pair of ruffled rumba panties. This pair was white
and smooth nylon in front with four rows of white ruffles across the
back with a pink bow at the top. They were line in a soft plastic
panty that went on silently as she guided them over Ash's Mary Jane
shoes and ruffled socks.
The slip went on easily and dropped to his legs with very little
gathering which meant there wouldn't be much coverage Ash realized and
the dress wasn't much longer when it came over. The dress was a
taffeta with ruffling around the hem and white like the slip. The only
color, besides the light green ballerinas was the green in his socks.
When Jessica helped him down and he stood there it was clear as the hem
touched his wrist that at least one row of lace showed.
"Come on sissy boy let's fix you a bottle for desert and then go get
some dinner," Jessica said moving back to the new baby bottles. She
grabbed one of the new bottles, twisted the top free and went to the
play kitchen which was nearly full size. The refrigerator, an
apartment size, had containers of drinks and fruit stocked in it,
thanks to Rose Ash assumed. Jessica opened one and filled the pink
plastic bottle with grape juice before sealing it closed and handing it
to Ash to hold. Ash flushed crimson as he followed Jessica for the
stairs.
Jessica let Ash enter the kitchen first. Without the wig and puffy
little girl's dress he looked exactly like a little boy diapered and
punished into a dress. Helen saw it first but it was Rose that said
it, "Bradford." "Bradford," Helen repeated.
"Bradford," Jessica said and added, "And hello mother, Rose, it's so
wonderful being back. Although, if you don't mind, I'm going to keep
this sissy."
"Jessica?" Helen asked cautiously as she added, "Was it that simple?"
"Yes and no mom," Jessica said bending to kiss Ash as she wiggled his
pacifier and guide him to his chair. "I sensed it when you ran his
background check and told me he was faking his diapers. Remember how
Irate Bradford's mother was when I sent him home in my Easter dress?"
"I remember, she accused us of torturing him. It wasn't until your
father did a little investigation of his own that we found out
Bradford's mother had been forcing him into diapers at night for his
bed wetting. She shut that lawsuit down pretty quickly after that.
But now you're saying that's when you split and became Julie and
Janet," Helen said.
"Not really," Jessica said and then added, "I mean I was in trouble
when that lady was screaming at you. I didn't know about the
investigation until a long time later so when I started seeing the
therapist and she started talking about personalities I began paying
very close attention to what she was saying."
"I was sending you there because I didn't know what that investigation
had found," Helen said.
"I know," Jessica said and added, "So there I am being told about how
there are two parts of me inside. Not literally but figuratively only
I'm hearing literally. So one part of me, Julie, likes boys in diapers
and baby pants and this other part, Janet, likes putting boys in pretty
dresses. It all makes perfectly good sense. Two parts, two names, two
personalities. I literally became a by-product of my therapist."
"And suddenly one day Jessica's disappears," Helen said and added,
"Until today that is. And all because of our new therapy doll."
Ash is suddenly in the middle of all three women looking down at him.
He pulls the pacifier out, swallows and grins sheepishly as he sits
there kicking his legs back and forth in a childish way. One hand
still holding his baby bottle, the other the wet pacifier.
"So in one day I've worked myself out of a job," Ash said.
"Wait? What?" Jessica said and added, "Who said you're out of a job?
You're a doll? My doll! Dolls don't work! Dolls just get played
with."
Ash smiled.
"Besides, I do the hiring and firing in this house," Helen said, paused
and before going on smiled again as she added, "I guess the question is
Ash do you see yourself this way for a little while longer? I mean...
is this a silly question or not? The thing is I know you like your
diapers, but these little girl clothes? Do you like those as well?"
Ash's face said it all. The blush looked like he'd been painted red.
"I'm not sure boys, even boys that do like it, are suppose to say so,"
Jessica said and added, "But since mom has asked, well precious do
you?"
"This is one of those questions I wish I never ever had to answer but
since you've asked the answer is yes," Ash said and added, "I mean not
long ago I was perfectly happy just taping myself into the diapers. It
was nice hiding behind the medical or so I thought. But then I
stumbled into this twilite zone where even the.... I'm not even sure
what to call you Rose, knows about Star Wars and all about me and
starts hitting all of my hot buttons and... well look at me? So yes, I
do like it."
"Want to ride again?" Helen asked looking curious.
"I wouldn't mind," Ash said as he added, "Hate giving up that hourly
rate and all the benefits so yes, I'd could do that."
"No honey, the room, car and a good number of those clothes are yours.
Jessica needs things to play with so that's stays the same for a time.
I'll figure out what to do about paying you out there in the real
world. Not sure if you want to wear your colors or slip into something
cuter but I'll leave that up to you," Helen said.
"I'll do the silks if you don't mind. Hard enough wearing diapers,"
Ash said and then added, "Although I've wondered about wearing a onesie
to keep my diaper from sagging but that's something I can talk with
Jessica about. If Jessica doesn't mind talking about it?
"Not at all. We really should refine your measurements and go spend a
little time shopping over the next couple of weeks. Maybe we could
figure out how to tuck you into a stroller? Have to think about that,"
Jessica said snickering at Ash's blush.
"See, this is what I'm talking about," Ash said and added, "Perfectly
normal sounding conversation till you listen to the words and realize
it's actually a group of really crazy people."
"This coming from a therapy doll," Helen said before turning to Rose
and saying, "And I'm hungry."
The End