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WORK FOR A PHYSICIAN By Geneva A young French monk, sent to Constantinople after its capture by Crusaders, discovers a magic book while sorting some plunder. Intrigued by its power and background, and concerned about his safety, he travels first to the ancient country of Genoria and then beyond. INTRODUCTION Those who follow my stories will recognize that they all involve mysterious small books, originating from archaic times, that contained magic spells. Many of the stories follow sequences in history as various individuals use these spells, especially the transformation spell that makes men into beautiful women. This story forms a connection between three sequences of my stories. First, the Genoria stories, consisting of "Good Relations", "Myrine", "Strange Dilemma", "Full Circle", "My Best Interests", "Making Love", and "Helping the Goddess". Second, it leads to the series, "The Templar Book", "The Green Pebble" and "The King's Servant." Finally, it also leads to two Zernos stories, "A spell of Freedom" and "She of the Book". START "Amazons? Who were they?" I asked, looking cautiously round at the rest of the brothers as they ate their evening meal, in case I had been overheard. At least my supervisor, Brother Bartholomew, was unconcerned and just laughed, his fleshy jowls shaking. "Well Louis, it seems you have much to learn about the legends around here. But then there's so many of them! Oops! Maybe I should say mythology. I am not sure where the Amazons lived, exactly, or let's say, supposed to have lived, but most people think it was quite a bit to the east of us. It was a state, or tribe, that the ancient Greeks talked about, but it was for women only, no men at all. Women had all of the positions in their society, even the ruler. Yes, they had a queen only. There's an ancient Greek legend says one of the queens was called Hippolyta. They had a reputation as fierce female warriors. Some old Greek writer said they even fought at the siege of Troy. On the Trojan side, so they lost. Not fierce enough, I suppose." "Now, I've heard of Troy," I said. We had just finished our meal and for some reason had started talking about old Greek legends and mythology. We were sitting in the quarters assigned to the Western monks, close to the imperial place in Constantinople. The sun was setting, lighting up the buildings across the Bosporus with gold. "Achilles, that's an ancient Greek hero, was supposed to have mortally wounded one of them at the siege of Troy, but then he fell in love with her! Yes, that's another legend. Anyway, there were no men at all in the Amazon way of life." He laughed. "I can see you're thinking about something." My face reddened slightly. Some difficulties about having a totally female society had come to mind, but the thought of sex made me uncomfortable. "Yes, I'm wondering how they kept their tribe going. They'd need children, and men are needed for that. So where did they get the men?" "They probably used men from neighboring tribes. I imagine there might have been more than a few willing participants to satisfy their lust." He gave a smirk. "Both of the men and the women! Not that monks like us are supposed to be concerned about lust." His eyes twinkled. "Mind you, just a bit along the Black Sea coast, it was all part of the Byzantine empire once, there is still a small city state called Genoria that they say had a lot of Amazon influence in its history and how it was governed. It's said that it was like the Amazons' country, and it began as a state for women only but then gradually it began to accept men and it finally got taken over by the Romans centuries ago. Now it's become semi independent again after the Crusaders took Constantinople, just like a lot of the city states along the Black Sea coast. But you hardly hear of it now. A lot of the former Byzantine possessions along there have started to look after their own affairs. They have to, and good luck to them! They can't expect much help from Constantinople now. It's too weakened. They'll all have the Ottoman Turks sniffing around for an opportunity to invade them. Their days may be numbered. "If it's true I imagine these Genorians probably also set up their society just like the original Amazons were supposed to, and also used men from other states or tribes for breeding." He gave an expression that was a half grin, half smirk. "Anyway it's just a story and so long ago anyway. This part of the world is full of legends from the ancient Greek cities and all the other old civilizations that rose and fell. They probably took stories and traditions from all around here and the old empires over in Mesopotamia, like the Babylonians, and Assyrians, maybe a lot from ancient Israel." He gave a superior look. "Now that we have the true Christian faith we should forget all of these." One of the more senior monks was passing us so I gave a semi-pious, semi- shocked look. "Yes, we have the true faith now." In spite of my words I was intrigued. The tales of the old civilizations and legends had always fascinated me, even though they had been pagan. Bartholomew wiped off his plate with his last crust. He absentmindedly scratched the gray hair on his temples. Like me he had a monk's tonsure, with the crown of our heads shaved, but on him, the large bald part on his crown hardly needed any touch up at all. "You know, I heard that Genoria centuries ago had some magic spell that would make men into women and women into men." I laughed sceptically. "Impossible! And why on earth would they have that anyway?" He spread out his hands. "How would I know? I suppose they could use it to plan their population when they didn't want to use men from other tribes. Liaisons and romantic entanglements could undermine their state." He gave a dismissive shake of his head. "Of course that's rubbish like all the rest. More pagan superstition! Men and women can't turn into each other." Just then the bell tolled and we hurried off to evening prayers but that night and over the next week or so the thoughts about these ancient civilizations and legends continually intruded on my mind. Still, there were plenty of jobs for a simple monk like me to do and gradually I thought less and less about our conversation. I had been born in France where my parents had me baptized Louis, after the Louis who was a French King and also a saint. My parents, the desMerons, were low ranking nobles from the Loire valley so, although we were better off than many, we were not as well off as many either. And, unfortunately for me, I suffered from certain critical disadvantages. I was a second son so I would not inherit any land. Also, I was neither suited by my ungainly build nor my meek temperament for a soldier's life and that eliminated becoming a Templar knight or one of the Crusader warrior knights so the only thing left was the Church. I was bookish too so joining an order of monks seemed appropriate. Like the men in all noble or semi-noble families in France, I had heard of the Crusades of course, and I had watched in a kind of helpless envy when some of the young men I knew from other noble families went off on another Crusade, the fourth one, supposedly to attack the heathens in Egypt. They would get fame and some would return with riches. To our shock and disbelief, gradually rumors began to drift back from the east that the Crusaders, instead of Egypt, had attacked and taken the Christian city of Constantinople and plundered it and even installed their own emperor, someone who would be sympathetic to French and Venetian interests and ambitions. Apparently the Crusaders owed a lot of money to the Venetians. Because Constantinople competed with Venice for trade, elimination of a rival would have been good for the prosperity of Venice. The new emperor the Crusaders had installed was a transplanted Fleming, and subsequently a call came to various orders of monks in France to send men to help the new rulers and that is how, with some initial misgivings, I eventually came to Constantinople. I did not like what I was being ordered to do but, being in religious orders, I did as I was told. Anyway, Constantinople sounded like an exotic place, with centuries of history before Paris was more than a collection of huts. Whatever ideas of Christian brotherhood I had soon vanished when I saw the rivalry of Crusader factions among themselves and with the Templars. Then there was the looting of treasures, the shuffling for positions and influence among the nobles, the continuation of European rivalries and feuds and the avarice of traders attracted by pickings from the Byzantine Empire. Finally, there was the distrust, dislike, even hatred by the inhabitants, mainly Orthodox Greek, against their new Roman Catholic overlords. All were suposedly Christians but the break of Byzantium with Rome was now extreme. The suspicion, contempt and dislike of the inhabitants was palpable anytime I moved through the streets. Worse, I was too easily recognizable in my monk's habit. Some of them even spat on the ground as I walked past them. Some days I felt so depressed that I wanted just to get out of Constantinople. I considered getting permission to return to France, yet the tales and legends of the Ancient East continually seduced me and kept me there. I grew more and more fascinated by the history, culture and the variety of people. I had taken quite a bit of tutoring before I joined a monastery so I was better educated than most of my fellow monks and with my bookish inclinations I got a call from Bartholomew one day. "Louis, these things in that storage room over there were 'collected' by some the Crusader knights and we are supposed to sort through them. So can you look through them and try to list or classify them? There are a lot of old manuscripts and minor treasures. The knights want to get them ready for sending back to Venice or Rome or other European cities." He hesitated." Or more likely they will end up in the estates of some or other noble family." By his wry expression I could see that like me, he thought it was just plain looting and theft, but I just kept my mouth shut. Among the various people around our quarters, there was an old woman, some kind of servant. I often saw her helping move bedding around to accommodate the lodging of transient knights, or sweeping floors or sometimes working around the kitchens. I assumed she was some kind of widow that needed work. She never said much, just getting on with her work. Then one day, a new lot of Crusaders, Templars by their clothing, had arrived form some expedition and were striding about, arrogantly as usual. She got in the way of one of the knights, a big red bearded man. He had been hurrying through the quarters, carrying a small chest and he roughly pushed her out of his path, cursed her and muttered something about her being a careless woman. The poor woman was laden, almost staggering, under a load of firewood for the kitchens and he put down his chest and quite deliberately knocked her load from her so it fell and she had to pick it up. He just pointed to her, "clumsy old woman,' he said and laughed while she glared at him. Then he cursed her again. "Stupid, useless woman," he sneered and made a dismissive gesture. I wish I had you in old Genoria, " she muttered. The rest of the knights all roared with laughter while she slunk off. The knight laughed as loud as anyone, picked up the chest again and strode off with it. I saw him setting it down in the storage room where I had been asked to make an inventory. When I saw the woman a week later, this time stumbling with some firewood, I helped her with her load. "Thank you sir," she said. "You are kind." I took her aside. "Can I ask you something? You said you wished you had that Templar in old Genoria." I asked her about old Genoria and its supposed spells. Her bitter anger erupted. "I heard the Templars were in Genoria, looting, like the rest of you, removing all the history," she hissed. "Yes, it would have been good to have him in Genoria in the old days. The queen could have made him into a woman and sold him away as a female slave. See how he liked that!" Her eyes narrowed. "Maybe he will die as a woman." I was amused by the idea of the great hulking knight becoming a woman. She took a frightened expression as if she had said too much and she looked round cautiously. "I am sorry, Brother. My temper gets the better of me. Maybe you are not like the rest of these westerners. Yes, supposedly in old Genoria they had rituals that could do these. But then it's maybe just old legends." She shook her head and put her hand to her mouth. "I'm rambling. That knight had made me angry and I was just pretending," she said weakly. "I've said enough." Before I could stop her she bustled off. She had said she was pretending, but I thought she was hiding something. I wondered if there might be something that she had accidentally let slip. But later I started thinking about what the woman had said. It was another suggestion, just like Bartholomew had told me, that the ancient Genorians had some kind of magic spell that would make men into women The few Knights Templar in the city were a tight mouthed group and kept mainly to themselves. They even carried out their own explorations and did not talk about them much but two or three days later Bartholomew called me to look at the material that some Templars had taken on their survey to the East. "Where about was this?" I asked casually. They called it 'survey', but I knew it was just another looting expedition. Bartholomew pointed vaguely east over the Bosporus. "It was along the Black Sea coast, around some old settlement called Genoria. I think I mentioned this to you some weeks back." He sighed. "The Templars must have taken all they could get from here so they went off exploring along the Black Sea coast and got hold of this stuff. It looks like some old rubbish to me but they seem interested in it. I don't know what had been in their minds when they took it, but anyhow, have a look at it and make a list. They left it here, but didn't say anything about it so you had better go through it." He pointed. "It's through there in the storage room. "Brother Jerome knows a bit of Greek too and maybe he can help you. It will give you some company. It will be boring by yourself going through all that old stuff." I pricked up my ears. The old woman had said the Templars had been at Genoria, one of the old cities that Bartholomew had mentioned earlier. So it looked as Genoria, or the remnants of the city, had still enough resources to give the loot that I had seen the Templars bring in. The looted stuff was lying in an untidy pile in the storage room where it had been dumped. I got Jerome to help and we moved it piece by piece over to a window the better to have a look at it. I lifted in a bench and a small table from the next room, got two sharp pens and ink and paper and we started to look at the material and catalogue it. A newish wooden crate, right in the middle of the floor, was the place to start but I sighed at the collection of old moldy stained books lying in the top when we pried the lid open. It looked like boring work and my fluency Greek was not that great. We slowly worked our way through these but once the last layer of these were removed I caught my breath. Lying underneath were several small statues, most in the style of the Byzantines, and a beautiful collection of icons, skilfully done in gold leaf and bright paints. "Nice looking stuff," said Jerome. "It's in good condition too!" "Yes, I wonder where this plunder will eventually end up. But I wonder too if these old books on the top were meant to hide this more valuable stuff, from prying eyes." "Like ours? Do you suppose we are meant to be here?" "That was our orders. If not, let the higher-ups deal with it." At the very bottom of the crate was a chest of fine cedarwood overlaid with gold leaf. I carefully eased it open and we stared glumly at its contents. "More old books! Good thing we both know Greek." I stared at the pile. "Look, going through this will take some time and it's getting late. We can leave it for another day." The next morning we set to working through the old books, removing each, cleaning and quickly reading over each in turn, just enough to make a summary. If necessary we could go over them in more detail later. It looked like most were nothing more than old records of Genoria, or old bibles or other religious tracts. Then in the late afternoon when I cleared the last stuff and reached the bottom layer I found something that made me sit back. It was a small statue, about the size of my forearm but totally unlike anything I had ever seen. It was of a woman, quite obvious from her prominent bare breasts, and round her head were projections meant to look like weapons or perhaps rays. But this woman had wings hanging by her side, and her feet were bird-like, with claws. She looked strange, exotic, yet powerful. "What's that?" gasped Jerome, his eyes wide in horror. "If I didn't know better I'd think it was some type of some kind of idol!" "An idol?" Jerome crossed himself and a bit belatedly I did too. Its exotic look fascinated and drew me. The chest had been filled by the Templars so they must have deliberately hidden this idol, if that was what it was. Still, I was a lowly monk. It was not for Jerome or me to question them. They were supposed to be warrior monks, but they were powerful nobles and well connected too. If they wanted to collect these objects it was not any business I wanted to get involved in. " I think we keep our mouths shut. Just write down it's a statue." Jerome looked out of the window. "Look Louis," he said. "The day is getting on and I have some other things to do. Can I leave you here for a bit?" "That's fine." I waved him off. Beside the idol was a small, fired clay tablet with incisions either carved or pressed in it. They looked something like old Greek style letters, but when I tried to sound out the words they made no sense at all. I had no idea what it was so I simply listed it as "Clay tablet with unknown marks, possibly a language." Lying in a corner was a small insignificant looking book. I had no idea how old the book was but the pages were parchment and not as brittle with age as I would have expected from its first scruffy appearance. It had a kind of leather cover that the pages were crudely sewn into. I looked at it idly then, recognizing it, I sat back and shivered. I had seen that kind of leather before in some old libraries in France. It was prepared human skin! At some point the skin must have been taken from some man, probably an executed criminal, and made into leather. I shuddered. My hand trembling slightly with distaste, I opened the book at one page and looked at its contents. It had letters or symbols on it that looked rather like those on the baked clay tablet, but on the facing pages the words were in modern Greek or at least a dialect. My facility with Greek was improving and it was fairly easy to read. I slowly read the Greek words out 'To ...heal,... an injury'. I shrugged. So it looked like a medical book. The next page was more of the same; the instructions were supposed to help in childbirth. I flicked quickly through the pages then sat upright when I read the last page. It said, 'To turn the man back into a woman'. I puzzled over what this meant then turned to the preceding page. It had instructions that said, 'To turn a woman into a handsome man'. This was impossible. I looked at the book in growing distaste. These things were not medical advice. It sounded like sorcery! I quickly looked at other pages. The preceding pages held instructions on how to make a man into a beautiful woman and to change her back by reading other words. I wondered if this sorcery had anything to do with the horror of the human skin. It reminded me of my conversation with Bartholomew about old Genoria. I looked around furtively just in case Jerome had returned. I was alone so I could decide what to do. I wondered if the Templars were really aware of what they had picked up. Just at that time I heard the bell for evening prayers so I closed the chest, hurried out of the room and locked the door. I thought I would be wiser not to list the idol or the book as I did not want anyone to think I was dabbling in old religions or whatever they were. All though the evening devotions I could hardly think straight, wondering whether I should report these to Jerome or Bartholomew, or just keep quiet but, by the next day, I was still undecided. That next day Jerome and I worked at further cataloguing the contents of the books we had taken out earlier, but more than once I looked guiltily at the chest. When Jerome went off on some other errand and I was alone I finally had my chance to get the book out from the chest and over the rest of the day I copied out its contents and the strange words as completely as I could. I hid my copy in my robe then laid the book and statue back on the bottom and covered it with another layer of books. That night I put my copy under my straw mattress. The next day we got down to work on the rest of the books, but we were suddenly interrupted by the intrusion of two armed men, both dressed in the garb of Templars. Both were big powerful men, one with a red beard and the other with a gray beard. I recognized the red bearded man as the knight who had insulted the old woman. They stood stock still and stared at us at first, as if surprised to see us with the pens in our hands and writing on the list. "What are you two doing here?" Redbeard snarled. I did not like the hostile look in his green eyes, small and beady for such a big man. The expression on the face of his companion was no better. "We were sent to list the contents of this chest." I pointed with my pen at the list. They rushed over and looked at my work, then at the chest. "How far have you done?" asked Redbeard. I thought it would be safer if I lied. "We have just finished these books and this clay tablet then we were going to look at the other stuff still in the chest." "You will not touch the chest," Graybeard roared. " The chest is to be opened by Templars only " He stared at me. "Who else knows about this?" I was surprised by their concern. "Well, just us two and Brother Bartholomew. He sent us to work here." "Get out, and give me that list." When I held it out he snatched it from me. "Get out and don't come back! This does not concern you." "But I was told..." I protested and the next thing I knew was a sharp pain in my jaw and I was knocked to the floor. Redbeard had punched me. I picked myself up and with Jerome supporting me I staggered out of the room holding my jaw and bleeding from my mouth. "Look, Jerome," I said, " There is something strange here. We had better report to Bartholomew and tell him what has happened. But I think we'd better not mention anything we found like that statue." Bartholomew gently tested my jaw. "It is bruised and it will be sore, but it's not broken and your teeth are still all there." He shook his head in exasperation. "I'm sorry about that, Brother Louis. If it was a sensitive matter they were careless to leave it there but they should have told me and I was careless too not to check with them. These Templars can have secretive ways. They're arrogant and violent too, as you just found out. Anyway, just forget about it. There is plenty more stuff to look over." He sighed. "One wonders what the Crusaders and Templars will leave unplundered here. "The knight who punched you, his name was Raymonde deGaladier. He is influential but has a bad reputation for his short temper. I am sorry you had to experience it. Unfortunately we'd better not complain." "Yes, I saw his bad manners earlier with an old woman." The next day the door to the room was open and when I looked inside the chest and icons and the other stuff were all gone. Bartholomew shuffled up to me. "How is your jaw today, Brother Louis?" "Sore, but I will survive." My jaw hurt and I had bled, but at least I had not lost any teeth. He looked into the bare room. "Yes, the Templars took it all last night. They must be keen to get it away. It's already been taken to the wharf to be shipped to somewhere in France. Rouen, I think it was called. So it's not our responsibility any more. I think you should forget about it." He looked round furtively. " One begins to think the Templars are up to mischief that we are better nor knowing about." Jerome and I kept on with our work, cataloguing the other plunder as it came in and watching it disappear but when I could be sure of secrecy I took out my copy of the spells and tried to work at them to see what they sounded like. Some were letters that sounded Greek, but others were just a mystery. About that time a new monk arrived on the scene, Brother Paul, also from a French monastery, although he said he had been born in England. He had first joined a monastery in England but his order had sent him to France for more education and from there he had been directed to Constantinople. As he could speak French, like me, and he was from the same part of Europe, more or less, we soon became friends. He was a good-looking young man, blessed with a straight body and keen gray eyes. Like me, he had a monk's tonsure, but still showed the remnants of curly fair hair at the back. His first exposure to the exotic wonder of the city almost overwhelmed him but again, like me, he soon saw our situation and the effects of the looting the Crusaders had caused in the city and the greed they were showing. For both of us it came to a head when some knights brought in a beautiful golden statue they had discovered hidden away in a cellar. It was a wonderful piece of work but it was soon taken away and I heard it had later been melted down. Paul had shaken his head when he heard. "I can't stand this anymore," he said. "I feel I am helping their vandalism. I want to go get away from here." "I have felt that way almost since I came here, but I stayed. Have you spoken about this to the head of our order here?" "Yes, and he tells me in no uncertain terms that it is my duty to be obedient or there will be consequences! He ordered me to stay here to help the Church. But what we are doing is wrong!" "Paul, I feel the same way and I want to get away, but you know, I'd rather not go back to France, instead I want to explore these lands. There have been great civilizations, not only here, west to Greece, but also all along the Black Sea coast, through Asia Minor, Mesopotamia, Palestine, Egypt. There was a country called Lydia. The Hittites mentioned in the Bible came from around there too. Then there were the Trojans that the Greeks fought with. I want to see these places and learn about them all." "I'd love to go with you but what would we do there?" "We may be monks but we are scholars too. We can read and write. These are useful skills. Yes, it's a pity we are Catholic monks and these people will be Orthodox and almost certainly suspicious of us but if we showed we were sincere and no threat and only wanted to learn about the past they might just accept us." "I am with you, but how can we get away from here?" "There are enough trading boats at the harbour from along the coast. Any ship's captain would take us. And this will help." I reached under the mattress, pulled out a bag and poured its contents onto the bed. His eyes lit up. "Gold coins? Where did you get these?" He looked horrified. "You stole them?" "Some Crusaders were careless and left the money in a room that I had a key to. They had stolen the coins from others so I do not feel guilty about removing them. If they can plunder, so can I! This will easily pay our passage." I pointed out of the window towards the East. "I think first we could travel along the Black Sea coast. There was a place, Genoria, they called it. It eventually became part of the Byzantine Empire, but it was started many centuries before. It is still there and I want to learn about it. Then further east there is Trebizond. Beyond that are the Caucasus Mountains and another great inland sea. All ready to be explored." I was not entirely honest with him. I wanted to explore, but I really hoped I could find enough information to decipher the contents of the book. If I had any doubts about getting out of Constantinople they were dispelled by the next events. The day after I heard a hubbub in our quarters and saw that my fellow monks were shaking their head and some were white faced. "What has happened?" I asked. "It's Brother Jerome, " someone said. "He was found murdered. He had gone out last night but did not return. Then his body was found in a side street. It looks as if his head had been beaten with a club." "Why? Who did it?" The monk shook his head. "No one saw it happen and there are no clues, no reason either, unless it's some of the inhabitants doesn't like our presence here! We are not very popular, after all." I was very upset. I had worked with Jerome and I thought he had been a decent man, but two days later I had worse news. Bartholomew was found stabbed to death in his chamber, right in our quarters. We were all suddenly terrified. "We are even not safe even in our quarters!" someone cried. "We are going to have to protect ourselves against the inhabitants." "But how would a stranger get in?" I asked. It did not make sense. Two days later I had been on an errand and coming back to our quarters when I got the impression that there was someone behind me. It had been raining and the cobbles on the streets were wet and slippery so I had a staff with me. I looked round but there was only the bustle of the crowd further along the street and I hurried on as fast as the wet cobbles allowed me. As my path went through a narrow alleyway and out of the sight of the crowd I heard a slight noise behind me. I turned, then gasped and cried out when a glancing blow hit my shoulder. Beside me there was a large figure almost completely covered in a black cloak. It was too dim to see his face but as the hood slipped I saw the bright red hair of deGaladier. He raised his club again but as he turned he slipped and lost his footing on the greasy cobbles. For ggod measure I swung my staff and it raked along his face drawing blood but I was no fighter and and I fled along the street to hide in the crowd. When I looked back there was no one to be seen. In my quarters that night I barred the door and I did not dare sleep at all. Jerome, Bartholomew had been killed and now an attempt had been made on my life. I realized that we were the three who had knowledge of the Templar loot. For some reason the Templars, especially deGaladier, wanted to silence us and the idol and magic book that they had taken came immediately to my mind. Despite the Templars' power, it would not be good for them if word of these to get out. They would want to eliminate me so if I wanted to save my life I had to get away. When I searched out Paul the next morning he was still willing to get away so while the others were at prayers we gathered our few possessions and just walked away before we were supposed to start our daily work. "We need some supplies from the market," I said to the guard at the door, but instead we headed down to the harbor. We had little enough possessions, but I had my copy of the book and the gold coins hidden in a purse under my habit. Once at the bustling harbor, we looked for a boat that would be trading along the Black Sea coast and even better, one that would leave that afternoon. I had brought hooded cloaks that we put on to hide our monks' habits and tonsures. We were lucky and found a suitable boat and that afternoon, as it moved out into the Bosporus, I took a look at the towers of Constantinople and the great dome of Hagia Sophia, wondering if I would ever see these again. I was not sure if I regretted leaving it or not it or not. I had grown to like the city, its bustle, the scents and sounds of the markets and the whole surrounding area but now I associated it with greed, intrigue and danger. I wondered if Paul and I would be missed. The monastic order would probably look for us but we were not very important in the whole scheme of things. Maybe they would think that we too had been murdered. On the other hand, deGaladier and his cohorts would after me for revenge and to silence me. Getting away was absolutely necessary. It was not very Christian-like, for a monk like me, but I cursed him. I only regretted I had not taken more revenge. It took us the best part of that day for the boat to sail north into the Black Sea, where the cautious captain anchored that night and all the following ones near the shorelines. We could simply have arranged to be transported over the Bosporus to the other side but I wanted to get a good distance away from Templars and travel by boat was the best plan. My first plan had been to get us put ashore at some village on the Black Sea coast where we could buy donkeys and travel overland but I grew more and more apprehensive when the forbidding mountains loomed ever higher the further east we sailed. It would make travel difficult and I discussed our plans with the captain. He gave a sceptical look. "You don't know this area, do you! Yes, you'll find that overland travel will be hard through these mountains. There could be brigands too.You two don't look as if you are very fit so I don't recommend it. So, where do you want to go?" he asked. "We want to get to Genoria. Can you take us there?" He thought for a minute. "There are mountains on both the south and west sides of Genoria." He snorted slightly. "Yes, I can put you off there. Not much to Genoria now though. It used to be more important. It's seen better days but the harbour is still quite good." So, several days later the ship drew into the calm waters of the small Genoria harbor. It was well placed wit the high mountains on the west. They would shelter it from strong west winds. We thanked the captain, disembarked with our few possessions and feeling a bit apprehensive and forlorn we watched as the ship put back out to sea. With only two small fishing boats docked in the harbour and a few sailors or fishermen we felt rather conspicuous and isolated. Paul looked at me. "What now?" "Well, we can't stand here. Let's get into the city." We had just moved to the main street leading from the harbor when we were approached by two armed men. They were good looking men, one dark bearded and the other fair. Both had regular features and tall, strong, straight bodies. "You have come to Genoria. That boat was from Constantinople," the dark bearded one asked. "Can you tell us who you are and your purpose here?" They spoke in Greek and although it was a bit different from the Constantinople accent we could understand them well. His hand was on the hilt of his sword. "We are explorers and travellers. I am Louis and this is my companion Paul. Yes, we came from Constantinople and we want to explore Genoria and along the coast." "By your looks and your accent you are not from there originally?" I was dark haired but my skin was fair and I had gray eyes. Paul was like many Englishmen, light haired and gray eyed. Constantinople was a melting pot of races, but most of the natives were olive skinned and with dark hair and eyes. He parted my cloak. "And by your clothes and your hair it looks as if you are monks. We don't want Latin monks here." "Yes, we were monks, from France originally. We were sent to Constantinople, but we have become disillusioned and have left." I told them about our disillusionment with the ongoing plunder, hoping to get some sympathy and I added that we were skilled at writing and reading. "Please, we would like refuge here. We cannot go back." He looked at us carefully. "Yes, we have felt the effects of the Crusaders here too. A group of Templars came along here some months or so ago and looted some icons from our churches. " He gave contemptuous laugh. "They dug around in some old pagan ruins inland from the city, up close to the mountains, and even poked through old records. They left quite a mess. "Yes, probably we can use you here. I am called Alexander. I am chief constable here and this is my assistant Basil. I presume you will want lodging? Will you stay here long?" He had relaxed but there was still an edge of hostility in his manner. "I don't know. We will not go back. Probably we can't now as we have broken our vows of obedience. If we like it here we may want to stay. If that meets with your approval." I added hastily. "If not, we will move further along the coast." "Hmm, there might be work for you at the palace up there." Basil pointed to a larger building. "The governor has a lot of records to take care of and he needs skilled help, I mean people who can at least read. Genoria has seen better days and it hasn't been helped by the Templar's looting. He keeps saying he will turn Genoria's fortunes around but I think its days have passed. Good luck to him!" The city of Genoria had given its name to the small city state surrounding it. It sat in the middle of a small plain but the forbidding high dark mountains gave a feeling of isolation. I thought that the city itself must have been quite attractive at one time. Now it looked neglected and small and provincial after the size of Constantinople. Older buildings had been built of cut stone but almost all of them showed signs of wear. Some buildings even had the remnants of carved marble friezes so at one time it had been prosperous. Constantinople was run down in parts too and had suffered damage from the siege and subsequent looting, but it still had a vibrancy that was missing here. Still, there was no use thinking about the city. My life there was in the past. All I was concerned about now was our safety, Genoria's past and the books and idol that the Templars had removed. We were lucky. The city's acting governor, Nicholas Doukas, was the son of a former Byzantine official, but when the whole Byzantine organization had broken down after Constantinople's capture Genoria and most cities along the Black Sea coast had either become independent or gave only lip service to the former empire. Nicholas' position was supposed to be ratified by some council of senior citizens but it appeared that their decision was a foregone conclusion. However, records had to be kept and Nicholas needed workers who were able to read. So, despite our slightly suspect background we were hired and soon found accommodation in a small room attached to a leather worker's house, close to the palace. At work we were put under the supervision of an old man called Julian, the head record keeper. At first, most of the work he gave us was boring routine clerking duties, but as the months passed and he began to rely on us more, he gradually had us help at other tasks. He told us much the same story as the two men we had met when we got off the boat. He had more or less given up on arranging the old records after the Templar looting but he told us Nicholas wanted the newer records put in good order. Julian seemed happy with our work and as he got more confident with us we were given more responsibilities and even began to travel around in the small city state to do various inspections. Also, as time passed, Julian's manner became more open and we began to speak more and more casually with him. In the back of my mind I was still thinking about the little book I had seen and one day I was able to direct the conversation to the Genoria history. Julian actually seemed quite keen to talk about Genoria's long history. He confirmed what Bartholomew had said. "It's quite an ancient place. It's rumored it was actually started by a group of disaffected Amazons. " He grinned. "Don't laugh. Yes, I know it's all mythology but this place has been established a long time. It was probably started almost two thousand years ago, and you'll forgive me if we can't show records as far back as that." He laughed at his attempt at humor. "But the tradition is that it was a female society, and no men at all, just like the Amazons were supposed to be, then it's said that gradually men began to be allowed in. Then, as the Roman Empire got established and expanded the Genorian's began to trade with the Romans and other parts so, more and more outside influences crept in and somehow, they tell me, the old ways just fell aside. Then, like the rest of the Roman Empire, it became Christian and then part of the Byzantine Empire. But now Constantinople has fallen to invaders. "He gave us a reproachful look. "And we have had to look after our own affairs more and more. " This was more or less what Bartholomew had told me but I pretended it was all new to me. "The Genorians were heathens at first then?" I offered. He looked at me scornfully. "Of course! That was long before Christ. In the ancient times they had their old heathen religion, a cult of Ishtar, who was an ancient Babylonian goddess. It more or less disappeared or went underground, although there must have been lingering traces of the cult. You see, about a hundred years ago, supposedly the goddess Ishtar reappeared out of her old temple and threatened the Byzantine rule. So they say! "That caused quite a bit of chaos, understandably, and soon afterwards several ships sailed from here with people who wanted away from the Byzantine government and those who were still Ishtar devotees. I think they went east, to the Caucasus region. I heard the city Zernos mentioned. There must have been about a hundred families in all. It was a drain on Genoria as a lot of them were skilled and educated workers. Maybe that started the decline of the city but maybe we are well rid of them if they still believed in a heathen goddess." He crossed himself. "There's an old temple to Ishtar?" I asked. "Yes, the ruins are still there up near the pass over the mountains. Oh, wherever you look around here, if you dig enough you'll find traces of the cult. It must have been quite a society." He grinned. "The legend is that in the old days, before the ancient Genorians allowed men to live here, they would arrange for men from neighboring tribes to come to the temple and sleep with the Genorian woman to get them pregnant. There's another old legend too, that the queen used to make suitable men they captured into women. More nonsense." This was intriguing. It was more confirmation of what Bartholomew had said and the book that I had seen in the Templars' loot. My heart was thumping, but I feigned a scornful laugh and made my next comments as casual as I could. "That must have led to as many male children as females. How did they handle that, I should say, supposed to handle it? It's a myth, after all." Julian burst out laughing. "There's a Greek myth about some man called Tiresias who the old Greek gods made into a woman. Maybe the goddess Ishtar could change male children too as well as captured men! Ah, all nonsense. Lot's of myths!" Still chuckling, he got up and left. But I was almost tingling with excitement. I was on the right track! It was the same story as I had heard earlier. When we arrived in Genoria, we thought it would be better not to dress as monks, especially Catholic ones and, after all, we really were not in the religious orders anymore. We also stopped shaving the tops of our heads and we gradually adopted more and more Genorian style clothing. At first we even started going to the local Orthodox services. Some parts of these were familiar, but much was not and gradually we stopped attending. No one seemed too concerned anyway. I also decided that the religious name I had used, Brother Louis, was not appropriate and I began using Merones, after my own surname. Then gradually too, as we dropped our overtly religious manner, I became aware that we were attracting the attention of several women. It seemed they were quite keen to talk to us and smile too. It was more than just casual conversation and increasingly this was mixed with sidelong glances, fluttering eyelashes and discreet brushing against us and touching our arms. They were flirting with us! I was annoyed with the women's behavior as over the years I had gradually discovered I was not really interested in women! I felt no particular attraction to these women and after a month or so I was relieved when their attentions moved to more receptive subjects. In that way my vows of chastity for the monk's order had been quite easy. There was something about Paul too. He was uncomfortable too for some reason. He would fidget in the presence of these women and look very uncomfortable at their mild flirting. Then, to my dismay, I realized he would open up and pay attention when there were men around. He would try to be close to them and start talking to them and I noticed that he used the same kind of mannerisms that the woman had used, along with little suggestive comments, so much so that I began to feel uncomfortable. I was bewildered as I did not know any way to adjust to his manner. At least he left me alone. Each day we worked away steadily through some of the jumble of records, examining it all and setting the newest in order. The rest were put aside for Julian to look at and each week most of these were burned. I was uncomfortable with destroying old records, but they were those of an almost moribund nation and alien to me anyway. Occasionally in some documents I saw words that looked like the old Genorian script but I discarded these too. Then, one day, close to the bottom of the pile, we uncovered an old ledger. I opened it casually and started leafing through the pages. I was astonished when I saw it contained two scripts. One was Greek, with the writing on the left-hand pages, but on the facing right-hand pages were words made up of symbols, just like those I had seen in the clay tablet and the little book in in the Templar's loot back in Constantinople I had seen and copied. Perhaps I could now access it. Paul was busy with another pile of documents so I was able to study them privately. I noticed that among the strange symbols were some Greek type letters, and these were in about the same place on the facing pages. I wondered if the book actually contained some official document in both the old letters and a Greek translation. That would be needed for a society in transition. If it did I finally had the key to the strange symbols I had copied from the Templars book. I now had a way of being able to translate the old spells, if that what they were. I was elated. Paul had noticed. "What are you so pleased about?" "Oh, I'll tell you later!" It took me another day of covert work to get them all copied on some parchment sheets and I put them into a folder. Now I needed to try them out, but the last part, the important part, was finding out how these letters sounded. That night I pulled out my copy and tried the spell, the one that supposedly healed cuts, sounding out the letters by the nearest Greek equivalent to their shapes. I had accidentally scratched myself on a wooden box. I watched the cut carefully and absolutely nothing happened. When I repeated it there was no change. Cursing under my breath, I went over my notes, checking the letters and sounds again. I had been right the first time but I read them again. Still nothing happened! It was obvious that if I wanted the spells to work I needed to get the proper sounds of the ancient language and I had no way of doing that. Frustrated and a little annoyed with myself for the amount of time I had wasted I was about to throw the book away but on second thoughts I decided to keep it, just in case something else turned up. The result had been disappointing but when I thought more about it the failure was not unexpected. What I really needed was someone who knew the sounds of the letters of the old language. I racked my brains but I had no way of doing that. Occasionally I wondered if I could find that if I travelled to Zernos. A week or so later the senior citizens met and confirmed Nicholas as a governor and he arranged a small celebration in honor of his assuming the position. The senior council, other leading citizens of Genoria and even his palace staff were invited. I was mildly flattered that the invitation included us. We were newcomers, and rather insignificant employees, but maybe it showed that Paul and I were finally fully accepted. I had been standing with Paul, at the back, enjoying some wine, and watching the more important citizens when a woman approached us. She was old, but like all Genorians she was tall and straight. She must have been a beautiful woman in her prime. "I have heard your name is Merones and you work in the archives?" she asked. "Uncovered anything interesting yet?" "How do you mean, my lady?" "This is an ancient city. Its records go back a long time." "So I have heard, but they were looted and left in almost total chaos by some Templar Knights. They have been so mixed up that that the Governor has ordered us to get rid of them. Many were badly decaying as well. He says the space could be better used." "Did you uncover any stuff from before the Byzantine era, even pre-Roman stuff, like from old Genoria? Oh, I should tell you my name. I am Joannina, Joannina Tagaris." I debated what I should tell her. "Yes, there are some records, but they are very old, some falling apart, and no one can read it anyway. It's some old language, definitely not Greek." Joannina looked at me slyly. "Are you sure about that? You see, maybe I could help." She shook her head. " I hate to see the old stuff going. You never know when it might be useful. My grandmother could read the old language and she taught me as she liked the old ways and wanted them preserved. She was in one of the ships that left here, about a hundred years ago. Her daughter, my mother, wanted to go too but she was married to Greek so she remained here while her parents went off." "Look, I did find some old ledger. I think it had some symbols that may be some of the old language. Can I show it to you? Uh, I think it would be better kept secret." She looked over her shoulder. "I agree. Many people don't want to know about the old days. I think you should bring it to me and we can go over it." The very next day I took the ledger to Joannina and she read the two scripts over, "Yes, the Greek is a good translation of the other writing, but you say you want to know how it sounds. And I see you have copied them carefully into parchment. Any reason?" "No, just idle curiosity. Well, I've always been interested in languages, how they sound. You see, I am originally from a far country called France. Its language has a lot of influence from Latin, but sounds different. I am interested in these things." "Well, let me see. That first letter, it sounds 'na', the next, 'cay', and the one after that 'xo'." Over the next hour I wrote down each letter with the nearest corresponding sound that I could think of using Greek or Latin or French. "So can I read this to you, to check?" and I began. It took me only a minute and she clapped her hands. "Wonderful, you have an good ear for sounds. Oh, it's strange to hear the sounds of the old language again, even though it's only a ledger." I could hardly wait to try it and when I got home I took out my hidden copy of the spell book and wrote down the letters and words sounded. I had been fairly successful. This had given me the correct sounds for more than more than three quarters of the letters. I wrote down the others and arranged to see Joannina again. This time she looked at me more shrewdly. "Thorough, aren't you? Maybe you should make up a dictionary." She shook her head. " I'm joking, the old language is gone. No one is around to read it anyway." "It's just in case I miss anything important on old manuscripts." "Merones, I think you have more reasons or motives than you are telling me, but all right, let me see them." This time I got a few more sounds and I was almost there but there were still one or two letters that she could not remember. This was very frustrating, to be so near but not quite completed ! I even spent many more hours rechecking old documents in the archives to see if I could get more clues but I was totally unsuccessful. Then, some months later, I was sent to the harbour to check the contents of a ship coming from the east when I saw a small rowboat on its deck. Like the main ship it had a name at its prow, and when I looked at it I saw it had the two the symbols I wanted to find sounds for! I was elated but I tried to act casually. "How was the trading on this voyage?" I asked the old man who appeared to be the captain. "Not too bad, but I wish I had a newer boat. This one sprung a few leaks in some heavy seas a week ago. I'd better not get into any storm." "Your boat is old?" "You noticed, did you? Yes, I 'm surprised it has lasted so long. This will probably be the last year I can use it." "I see you carry a small boat too. Just for emergencies?" "Yes, and it's handy if I want to get ashore for anything." He tapped his foot on the deck. "This old boat is too clumsy." "You have a name for the little boat at its bows? I can't read what it says." He laughed. "No wonder, No it's not Greek. It's the old Genorian language. My family came from here, oh, maybe a hundred years ago. There's a tradition in my family to give ships old Genorian names. That means 'Beautiful Girl of the Waves'. A bit fancy for a simple little boat on an old tub like this!" "How do you pronounce that?" He did so and I had him repeat it. "It sounds strange compared to Greek but the sounds roll off the tongue," I said. "Yes, old Genorian was a beautiful language." I practised it several times until I had it committed to memory. He was amused at my attempts and laughed. "It sounds good coming from you. You have traces of a strange accent but a good ear. Still, I wonder why you bother! Nobody speaks it any more. I'm from a village on the sea, called Peraga. It's about a day's journey from Zernos. That's where my ancestors settled but they don't use the language any more either, except for boats!" At last I had all I needed and scarcely able to believe my luck I rushed back home and wrote down the sounds of the old language. It passed my mind that the original spells, wherever they came from, might not have even been in Genorian, but it was likely the Genorian language sounds were close to the original. The sailor may have dismissed the old language but I was now ready for another trial. I deliberately cut myself slightly and read out the strange sounds of the healing spell. I drew in my breath when I saw the bleeding stop quickly, but there it remained with no further change! It was still an open cut. The spell had only been half effective and there was still something missing. I pounded the table and cried out my frustration. Paul was outside and had heard my cry, "What's the matter, Louis?" I hastily put the book away and hid my cut. "Oh, nothing, I think I fell asleep and had a bad dream." I thought about it that night and then I remembered that the book the Templars had tried to hide from me had a cover of human skin. I had wondered at the reason then and now the realization hit me that the spell book or the spells themselves needed to be covered in human skin to be properly effective! I sighed. That would be next to impossible. I thought briefly of corpses and shuddered, but I had seen a few funerals and any bodies in Genoria were guarded by relatives and then quickly buried or burned, apparently an old Genorian rite. I thought about the tanning process to preserve skins and with a jolt I got the idea that the human skin might not need be dead! The next day I copied the letters carefully onto to my thigh. Then, my heart pounding, I cut myself slightly and read the spell out when Paul was out on some errand. I felt a quick sting at my cut, and this time the bleeding stopped, the slight tear in my skin also sealed up and there was absolutely no sign of it after a few minutes. Even the wound of the previous night healed up completely too. I was exhilarated, yet awestruck too. I now possessed a powerful tool but it was also magic or witchcraft and would be suppressed if anyone heard about it. My life could be in danger too. I finally had access to a powerful collection of magic if I could fit sounds to all the words and letters of the supposed spells and I set to work through them. It was slow at first but by the time I reached those that did the men to women and other changes, at the end, I was getting quite proficient in the old language. I wondered if I was now one of the few people in the world who could use it fluently. Cautiously, carefully, I began to try each of them out, writing the words on my thigh or arm and then reading them out, and always with success, although I had to be as secretive as possible. For this I needed subjects to try the spells out. That was what they were, spells, magic, and utterly forbidden! Perhaps they were part of some black arts, but my curiosity had grown too great for the danger to deter me. I would work my way through all the remedies to check them but although cuts and injuries were common in the small population, others maladies were not. Difficulties in women's labor were probably the next most common and I saved several women a great deal of suffering. I may even have saved a few mothers' and infants' lives too but eventually, working through the book, I cured enough harelips, broken bones, club feet, and cast eyes and other such stuff to convince myself that all the spells worked. In spite of my efforts to keep the collection of spells secret, word of my cures got out and gradually I became known as Merones, the physician. It was awkward too having to copy them to my skin and then hide the words as I read them off. Finally, all that was left was to try the last spells in the book, those that made men into women or women into men. Unfortunately trouble in the Genoria administration had been brewing and about that time there was kind of palace revolution and Nicholas was deposed from his office by his deputy Mark Palekaris and sent to a mild arrest on his farm near the surrounding mountains. He was guarded at first but gradually that was relaxed. The usurper had little time for the older servants and employees too and we were dismissed. At least, with what I got paid for my physician's services, money was not a problem for us any longer but I could see suspicion of outsiders creeping in. I was worried when Paul was arrested one night. Fortunately he was released soon after. His face looked scuffed but he would not tell me anything about it. I wondered if there was more to it than he wanted to tell me. Still, there was now danger and I began to think it was time I got away from Genoria. I thought of the Genorians who had left some generations earlier and gone to the lands at the eastern end of the Black Sea. I was curious about Zernos and eventually I decided I needed to see what had become of them and possiblyI might even be able to pick up more magic spells from them. One day I came back from helping a woman in labor to find Paul staring at the floor, the picture of dejection. "What's the matter?" I asked. "It doesn't matter!" he muttered, but he started crying. I was uncomfortable being around anyone who was crying, especially a man, but we had become good friends so I reluctantly put my arms around him and held him while he sobbed. "Come on, tell me!" "Merones, Louis, I think you have realized that I am not like most men. That time, a few weeks back. I said I was arrested. It wasn't because I was a foreigner. It was because,.... "Merones, I like women, but I'm not attracted to them, sexually, I mean. It's really that I'm envious of them. Instead I think... I know... I am attracted to men. I tried to resist my feelings in the monastery, but it was the wrong place. It was all men, no women at all and I had to be very careful not to let my inclinations be known. I was careless once, with another monk and I think that was one reason why the abbot sent me to France. "That's what I was arrested for a week or so ago. I had met a man and I thought we were,.... would be.. friends but some other men saw us and started insulting us. Some of Mark's men came on the scene and the disturbance was blamed on us and we were arrested then beaten. "Then, it was when I walking in the marketplace today I passed three young women. There was something about the way they looked that... I don't know, did something to me. "They were having great fun, laughing and obviously thoroughly enjoying themselves. They all must have been from rich families as their clothing was high quality and stylish and fitted them beautifully. It was fancy expensive stuff, with a lot of silk, not like the simple plain clothes the stall keepers wear. They were all done up with cosmetics too and ornaments in their hair and gold and silver and amber jewellery and elaborate earrings. Their chatter attracted attention but they didn't mind, especially if it was from young men. They just smiled at them and fluttered their eyelashes. They were all quite pretty, just like most native Genorians." He was right. I had also noticed how the beauty and grace of the Genorian women. The men were well proportioned and good looking too. I wondered what it was about Genoria that had made them so. One of the spells supposedly made beautiful women. Could its results have been passed down through the generations? Paul smiled sadly. "They were alive and vivacious, all enjoying life. One of them smiled at me, as if she wanted to flirt with me. I thought she had lovely white teeth and red lips. She was pretty and slim, and her clothing showed off her figure. Her shiny hair was set in ringlets hanging to her shoulders and she wore an exotic perfume too. Her bright appearance made me aware of my dull clothing." I was puzzled. "You were attracted to her?" Paul shook his head. "No, her manner were suggestive but did not stir me, but I... I actually was jealous of her. I wanted to be her! To have her vivacity and joy in life and her attractiveness. I wanted to have beautiful clothes like her and decorate myself like them to make myself attractive .. to men. " I squeezed my eyes shut and groaned internally but he seemed to have found his voice and I let him carry on. "I'm envious when I see how women move their bodies, I mean how they sway their hips and how their breasts move and the ways they toss their hair, or wave their hands in conversation, how they tilt their faces and purse their lips as they talk. I don't know if they do it deliberately to show themselves off to men but I am envious I want to be free to do that too, to men. "Merones, I have thought this way for years. Maybe it has been building up." I watched him as he went into a kind of reverie. "I often wondered what it would have been like if I had been born a girl," he continued. "Even when I was a boy I ..I envied my sisters and their female friends. I played with other boys well enough, and being semi nobility we were expected to learn swordplay and fighting and riding warhorses and so on but I never liked any of it, not even the pretend stuff that boys do. I wanted to be like my sisters and have more intimate fun and their pretty clothes. They got compliments about how pretty they were. I wanted that too. "As I grew to become a .. man... my feelings did not change, and I still found myself looking a little enviously at girls, singly or in groups. They always seemed to look after their appearance and kept fresh and clean, more so than men. I think that much of it is the joy of just being young women, enjoying life, and their friends, yes, their own bodies and having pride in them. "I wish that I had been born a girl and grow up to get a lovely curved figure with breasts and a slim waist and wide hips and more intimate parts, not a hairy body with and ugly dangling penis and scrotum. Yes, I would have a woman's body's with its demands and monthly rhythms but I would welcome these. "I would have different emotions too. I would confide in girlish things with my mother and with other girls and we would help each other. My father, he would be much more protective and no longer push me to compete and be aggressive. "I tried to hide these feelings, but maybe my ... inclinations were recognized and that was why I was sent to a monastery, to get rid of me. Of course, we did not see any women there. "But now we have abandoned monastic life and we are exposed to men and women daily. This is a warm climate too, not like cold of Europe with its rains and clouds, so women's and men's bodies are not nearly so hidden under heavy clothes and one can see their bodies more easily." He went into a reverie again. " Then if I was a woman I would be attracted to men and they to me. I think I would be pretty. I have seen how women act differently when men are around. I watch men too. I wonder what it would be like to be a woman and embrace a man, lie with him and have him kiss and caress me. As a woman I would lie on my back, hold my legs open, and allow him to enter me. Maybe he would drive me to ecstasy and I would hold him as he filled me. Or maybe I could be on my belly, my hips raised, welcoming him fully in me. "I could get pregnant and carry new life in me. Yes, I have wondered how it would be to have life grow inside me, birth a child and then feed it at my breasts. But I will never be able to do that." I put my head in my hands and shook it. Life had become complicated. He slid his hands down his loose gown. "But, when I look at my body I only see a man, not a woman and I know I can never be like these girls. My wishes are just fantasies. I have a man's body and I have to accept that. But I will live miserably." He gave a shuddering sigh. "Yes, all these are unreachable but I often fantasized about them." He wiped his tears. "There you have it, Merones." He sniffed again. "So I have unburdened myself?" I was totally overwhelmed with his admissions and could not think of appropriate words. "You poor thing, " I said lamely. He must have seen my embarrassment as he voiced his thoughts, but he carried on. "I still continually try to push these to the back of my mind. I suppose I could put on woman's clothing, but I'd never be able to live fully as a woman. It would be too difficult, and futile too. Even if I did try to live as a sort of woman, the ultimate part of being a woman, to bear children, would be beyond me." His voice went husky. He spread his hands. "At least I've broken with my past life as a monk and we've started to establish a new identity here but this new regime makes life more difficult . "When I joined the monastery I honestly tried to suppress my feelings. I threw myself into the religious life with my studies and devotions but they have never gone away. I desperately resisted them, as I was supposed to. I even flagellated myself until I bled, but they kept intruding into my thoughts and dreams, maybe as a welcome escape from the dreary monastery life. Just today, seeing these girls, these thoughts have suddenly come back in full force. I just feel depressed." He gave a brave smile. "Sorry, Louis, showing that I'm sorry for myself is not a sympathetic trait." Paul had unburdened himself to me and I was almost overwhelmed with pity for him. I thought of the spell lurking in my little book. If it worked like the others I could make him into a woman but there were problems too. I wondered if he had really thought about them. The differences between men and women were not trivial. I thought of some rats I had recently dissected for my own curiosity. Male and female rats were different internally and it was logical that men and women would be too. With so many changes the spell would be drastic and possibly severe and I wondered if I dared try it. I would not want to risk Paul's life. After his soul baring Paul did not mention it again. I was relieved but I could not think of a suitable response and I felt completely helpless. Then I had a visit from the woman Joannina who had given me information before. Her face was filled with concern and worry. "Merones, I hear you are now established as some kind of physician. Some people say you use magic, but we all know that it is because you have studied healing, using the old ways." She gave me a faint knowing smile. "Yes, I know you have been interested in the old Genorian language. I remember my grandmother telling me that the old Genorians had spells that could do all sorts of healings. So, please, Merones, I need your help. My oldest grandson has been injured badly. He fell from a tree and broke a leg, but I think he is injured internally too. I am afraid for his life. Please can you help us?" "By all means, Joannina. I am glad to help. You helped me in the past." We hurried over to her daughter's house where her grandson was lying on a bed. I did not like the look of the boy. He was flushed and in great pain and barely conscious. I had found some plant extracts that helped in controlling pain but this injury was away beyond these. I would have to use one of the spells from the book. The correct spell did not have many words and while Joannina looked intrigued, I pulled up my sleeve and bared my arm, wrote the words down on my bare skin and read them to the boy. Even I was surprised when it only took two minutes to work. The boy first gave a wince of pain but almost immediately relaxed. Soon, his complexion changed, his labored breathing became even, the swelling on his leg subsided and when I gently tested it the break had healed. I pressed his belly and he did not gasp or wince. In a few minutes more he was up and walking. His mother burst into tears and embraced him then me. Joannina embraced me too. "Merones, I thank you with all my heart. Your healing arts saved my grandson. We are eternally grateful. Please, if you need any help just ask us." She looked round furtively. "Merones, I know you are from the other end of Europe and your countrymen have done many crimes here but it is good for Genoria that you now have these skills. You see, my grandmother told me that some combinations of words similar to these were once used by certain wise women in Genoria. So, I see you have been very successful at unearthing them. I am glad I helped you." Her voice lowered. " A word of caution, it will be in your best interests to use these skills discreetly, so they do not draw the notice of the Church. But rest assured, no one will hear of them from me. But how many do you have?" "More than a dozen so far." She looked impressed. "You have tried them all?" "Yes, except for two that change sex and their reversals. I am still working on some others to get them to work better. " "Reverse spells, to change sex? Now I wonder what they were about?" She gave a mischievous knowing smile. Joannina knew something but I felt I could trust her. "Actually, I am afraid to try these. You see, one makes a man into a woman and another makes a woman into a man. And these both can be reversed." She nodded quietly. "Yes, in old Genoria, ancient Genoria, there are legends that the queen used things like these." It seemed to me that she knew more about the old days than she had first admitted, but I suppose she also needed to be careful who she spoke to. She pointed to my arm. "But I notice you wrote the words on your arm. Why is that?" I sighed. "I found out that they needed to be written in human skin, or at least in a book covered with human skin." I shook my head in disgust. "It's awkward, I know, but I have tried it. The spells do not work properly otherwise." "Maybe you could get some skin and cover them." She gave a small laugh. "It would save you having to write them all the time. Your skin is getting quite stained with ink. People might start to ask questions." I flushed. "I have no way of getting human skin." I remembered my distaste at the book the Templars had plundered. "Then perhaps I can help you. My late husband loved history and in his library there are many old books he collected and I believe one of them is covered in the skin of an executed criminal. It's only an old history book and I don't need it so perhaps you can try that. I owe you immensely for the life of my grandson." When we got to her house she pulled an old book from a shelf and passed it to me. I examined the cover and indeed it looked like prepared human skin. I idly opened the book. It was filled with Greek words and appeared to be a history, as she had said. I raised my eyebrows. "Are you sure you don't need it?" "Some old history, I don't need it. I think you can use it better." I took a deep breath. "Joannina, I would like to try these other spells. There is a young man with me, Paul, my companion, who is terribly unhappy as a man. He.. he wants to be a woman, desperately. I think if he became a woman it would help him. I could try to change him with the spell but I have never tried it before and I am afraid to take risks. Where we live too is not private enough. Joannina, you live in this big house with only one servant. Your children have their own houses. I want to try this with Paul. Could I prevail on you to..." "Merones, of course," she said, interrupting me. "That would be a kindness to the young man. However, perhaps sometime he will have second thoughts about being a woman. He really should be sure." She spoke very seriously. "He may feel envious of woman's lives but many women envy men their lives too. He may be disillusioned if he found himself as a woman and having to live as one. He would have a lot to learn." "Yes, I am aware of that. I will make sure Paul has thought carefully about it." "You would have to be careful too, Merones. If the change is successful a new woman will have appeared. With this new regime here, eyebrows could be raised at you living with her, unmarried. Maybe fingers would start wagging. This new administration may not be as tolerant as Nicholas'. I think, perhaps, if the new woman is willing, she should come to live with me. It would be more private. As a woman she would have much to learn, and what better way than have her live with me? I would be delighted to advise her and guide her." She gave a wistful smile. "Actually, it would be a pleasure to have a young woman around the house again. I miss having my daughters around, but they have their own lives to lead." So now I had an effective and convenient way of using the spell and I had a place to do it, but I would have to approach Paul delicately to see if he really was willing to try the spell. I started after we had finished our evening meal, feeling very nervous and hesitant. "Paul, some weeks back you talked about wishing to be a woman. Do you still feel that way?" He blushed. "Yes, even more so. Why?" He sounded even more enthusiastic. "I did not tell you but one of my spells could perhaps do this." His eyes lit up but I held up my hand. "Paul, I have no idea how long it will take, or how good the effects are. It could be a risk to your life, but would you be willing to try it? Become a woman?" He looked at me, incredulous. "You could do that? Yes, yes, of course I want to try it." "But Paul, have you thought about it fully? You would find yourself in an entirely different body, one that is smaller and weaker. Your anatomy will be changed completely. You will have breasts, wide hips, and no longer a penis at the bottom of your belly. You will have the vulva, I mean the folds and cavity of a woman. Are you ready for that? He tensed and I saw his hand edge towards his groin. " It will mean a totally different life. If you become a woman, men will be attracted to you. Just now you say that you are attracted to men. You have found that causes difficulties but if you are like most young women I hope you will find yourself still attracted to men. At least that will be accepted and expected. But some men may just lust after your body so will have to be much more careful where you go and with whom. I mean that your life will be more restricted. There are certain things you could not do and should not do, I mean as a woman." "Then, like women, you will bleed every month. You could get pregnant, bear children, birth them. You would have to look after them." I took a deep breath. I was embarrassed by this in two ways, his confessions and the feeling I was behaving like a fussy parent. I saw conflicting emotions cross his face, but he nodded. "I told you earlier I wanted these things. So I want to try the spell. Please, Louis, I mean Merones, I want to do it as soon as I can." It looked as if he had made up his mind. "All right, I have spoken to Joannina about it. You will stay at her house while you undergo the spell and then, afterwards, we think it will be best if you continued to stay with her. She will certainly help and advise in how women live much better than I can, you know, clothes and uh... women's intimate stuff. We will do it tomorrow evening." "You've tried other spells but do you know how this one works?" I shook my head. "I don't and that's what worries me. The effects will be drastic, after all. Maybe it will be painful." He grimaced. "Well, if it works, I am willing to put up with the risk and the pain." Paul may have agreed but he became increasingly nervous as the day went on. I suggested that we wait until he thought it over but he shook his head. "No, I want to do it," he said, and that afternoon we made our way to Joannina's house. After a light meal, tastier and better than our usual fare, she showed us the room where we could try the spell. Joannina, " I said. "It will have to be you or Paul that reads the spell. I obviously can't." "You don't want to be a woman too?" She smiled merrily. We were almost ready but then there was a distraction. A group of men was causing a commotion outside. We watched them for a bit then turned away. Joannina shook her head." This city has been in some turmoil after Nicholas was deposed. Some want to return to the old days. That was some argument between some of Mark Palekaris' supporters and those who want Nicholas to return. "I'm not sure who would be best for Genoria. Nicholas wanted to get back to the old days. Mark wants to sweep these all away." "Joannina, no wonder. It was quite prosperous in the past. You know, I find the old history fascinating. I was reading that old book you gave me. The cult of the Babylonian goddess Ishtar here was quite strong and there's that old ruined temple, quite a big one. I've always wanted to look in it but I've never had enough time. Anyway, I have removed the book's cover but I put another one on. It's ordinary leather but it will keep the book better. You know, this area has an interesting history. I would like to study it more, but there is history all over." "Yes, lots of history. How did you get here, Merones? What is your own history?" I was flattered that she wanted to know about me and I told her about my background and the travels that had brought me to Genoria. It was not often that people were interested in me. When I had finished she smiled encouragingly."You know, Merones, and Paul, it's quite remarkable that you have travelled right across Europe and into Asia Minor. It's a long way. And now you have put that ancient spell book together. That is just wonderful. You are very talented." Her interest and compliments got me talking again about my background, and my attention became totally taken up until I noticed that Paul had been flicking through the book. I suddenly realized he was reading it and sounding out the words. Then he closed it laid it down. "They are certainly strange sounding words," he commented. "Yes, I wrote the Greek or Latin equivalents. They sound pleasant, but strange." I suddenly felt very apprehensive. "Words, how do you mean?" I blurted. "Which ones?" "The transformation spell. Well, I just read the words." "What?" I gasped and almost simultaneously I had a small shiver. Paul looked at me in surprise then his mouth gaped open with understanding and I saw him hunch his shoulders. Joannina gave a small gasp as well. I was panicking. "Paul, Paul, you didn't read them all, did you?" I babbled. "Well I..." He stopped with a shiver while I felt another enormous shiver. "No, not all of them, just the transformation one I'm going to use." "What? You fool." I screamed. "It must be the spell. It's started. It's affecting us all!" My teeth started chattering and I began shaking violently. I saw Paul's body shaking the same way and his eyes rolling with panic. Joannina was grimacing and had tensed. I slid to the floor and blackness closed over me. I slowly woke up but the closer I reached consciousness the pain coursing all through my body increased too so I was groaning and gasping. My head was pounding, my throat was dry and I hurt all over. I had endured fevers before, but this was the worst I had ever experienced. I must have lain in that state, semi-conscious, unable to move, turbulent incoherent dreams running through my head for an hour then I felt someone wash my face and put water at my lips. I gulped a little but I began coughing, each cough sending stabs of pain through my chest. But whoever it was giving me water was patient. It was a woman's voice. "Try to drink a little, Merones. I've got an extract from willow bark. It will taste bitter so I've sweetened it with honey and it will help with the pain." Almost choking, I managed to swallow some of the bitter brew. I became aware that someone else, another woman by the sound of her voice, was groaning too. Slowly my aches gradually lessened, possibly the willow bark working. Then someone washed me with cool water again, all over my face and chest, my belly and between my legs. Some how my chest felt more sensitive than usual and I found it awkward to lie on my front but it was all too much to bother about and I must have fallen asleep or unconscious again. The next time I woke, I tried to open my eyes but they were too sore and painful to open further. My mouth was dry again and my groans came out as high-pitched croaks. I struggled to rise, but my arms were too weak to support me and I had to lie back on the bed. At least I did not feel as bad as before. I decided I would probably live. I wondered where I was. It did not feel like my usual bed. "Merones?" I heard, a woman's voice. "Can you hear me? Nod if you can." "Yes," I said. "Ohh, my head. What happened?" My throat was parched but for some reason my voice was higher pitched. I felt my eyes gently bathed and I forced them open, blinking in the light. Joannina was looking down at me. At least I think it was Joannina. Her face had changed subtly. She held another drink to my lips. This tasted like watered wine, and I sipped it, carefully swallowing then drank more deeply to quench my thirst. "Merones, it must have been the spell. Paul sounded it out and we were all affected. You'll be glad to know it certainly works." Spell? What spell? My mind was still too fuzzy and I could not concentrate. I rubbed my eyes and my face, but my skin felt smoother somehow. My chin and neck were itchy and when I scratched them some of the hair on my beard began falling out as little wisps that stuck to my hands. I looked closely at my hands and for some reason they looked smaller too. "God, I feel awful." I gasped. Something did not seem right. My voice was hoarse, and had a funny tone to it. Joannina held another cup to me. "Here, have another sip. This is ordinary wine this time but I think it would be better if you slept a bit more." I lay back and did as she said and when I woke up I felt much better. I tried to sit up but there was something shifting and pulling at my chest, like weights. I idly felt at my chest and felt soft firm warm projections. Wondering what it was I looked down and screamed. I registered that it was a woman's scream but worse, right in my view, were two woman's breasts, full, and each tipped with a prominent rosy nipple. "Oh no! "I gasped. As the realization hit me I jerked upright, pulled my legs openand looked down. I screamed again. My penis and scrotum were nowhere to be seen. I stretched my legs further and fumbled between them desperately. All my manhood was gone and in their places were a set of vertical folds, and a moist opening. I was a woman there too! I remembered that I had been about to try a transformation spell on Paul, but he had thoughtlessly read it before I was ready. Joannina was at my side and she put her arms around me while I screamed until I was hoarse. "It's the spell. It changed you," she said. "You have felt down there, but test your breasts too. Squeeze them, but gently. You only touched them before. Go on! you're stuck with them so you might as well get used to them." Gritting my teeth, I tested them, a strange soft but firm texture. I flinched at the sensitivity of the nipples. "You like how they feel? They are a woman's birthright." Having sensitive projections on my chest was not in my plans. "I don't want to be a woman. I will change back when I can," I cried. But anger was not helping matters and I breathed deeply and forced myself to calm down, remembering that there was a way to reverse the spell. "At least I know it now works. Paul read it. Oh, where is Paul?" "He woke up much earlier or I should say 'she'. She is changed like you. Shall I fetch her? She has recovered faster too. Yes, she is a woman, quite a pretty one too." She beckoned and a young woman came over to me, hesitant, and looking very nervous. She was wearing a light woman's gown. I saw bulges in the top, and the points of nipples. Further down, the dress fitted close to her body, showing women's hips but hinting at a slim waist. "Merones, it's Paul," she said. "I'm terribly sorry. I did not think." My anger was almost worn out and shouting at her would not help. "Well, at least you are changed, as we wanted." "And me too," said Joannina. "Actually I like what it has done for me." She sounded very pleased. I looked at her carefully. She was subtly changed too, her face smoother, her body more upright. Her hair was still gray but it looked much shinier and healthier. She looked like a much younger woman. I told her and she looked pleased. "Your whole appearance is changed too! But did you fall unconscious?" I asked. "I went into a kind of mild fever with aches but it did not last long, not much more than an hour. Now I feel much younger and I know I look much younger. You know, Genorians, especially the women, were known for their physical beauty. It's said that's because many of their ancestors had been subjects of the spell and then the effect carried on to their children and descendants. But even then it has still affected me." Her eyes twinkled. "A wonderful spell for me!" I looked back to the woman who had been Paul and she gave an embarrassed look. She apologized again. I shook my head. "Look, Paul, Joannina, I am glad for you but I don't want a woman's body. I will have to use the reverse spell as soon as I can but just now I feel too weak. It would not be a good idea to use another spell right away if the effects of that last one were so severe." "You're sure you don't want to stay a woman?" Joannina asked. "You are quite attractive too." "No, certainly not!" I swung my woman's feet and legs over the bed and stood up, swaying as I tried to get my balance. Looking back on that it may have been lingering effect of the spell, but it may have been that I was not used my wider hips and the sway of my breasts. Joannina supported me as I lurched to a chair and I took another gulp of water. "How long was I unconscious?" "Almost two full days. Paul woke up about twelve hours earlier." I shook my head and glared at the woman who had been Paul. "Two days I have lost! All right, what happened during the spell?" "You went into a kind of shivering fit first. Maybe you remember that bit but then you fell unconscious. So did Paul. I felt a bit feverish too but I managed to get you both lying onto the floor on blankets and by then you both had started to shrink. It went gradually but steadily and your features softened, and your bodies changed proportions." She gave an embarrassed smile. "You'll forgive me but I was curious too and I wondered what would happen to your male bodies so I removed your clothes. At least it was not cold. I was much less affected. "The change was quite an astounding process. So, over the few hours your bodies gradually shrank and rearranged into women's. As you have found, you have women's waists and hips. Your arms and legs have become smoother, your rears have filled out and you both now have pretty breasts. Down between your legs your penises just shrank and the rest pulled into your bodies but finally your groins split and rearranged into a women's pattern. "Actually you are both quite pretty." She brought over a mirror, "Have a look at yourself, Merones. Paul has already been admiring him.... herself. Quite a bit!" I did so. I was completely taken aback. In the mirror I saw a young woman with what could have been a beautiful oval face, slightly prominent cheekbones, except that her complexion was blotchy. Her colouring was like mine had been. Her eyes were a bluish gray, set under delicately curved eyebrows. I grimaced when I saw her lips were more prominent, curved into a pretty bow, delicate and inviting. She would easily attract men and I did not want that at all. Her neck was longer and slimmer, and missing the bulge of the adamsapple that I used to have. "My face is blotchy and my chest is hairy," I complained. She grinned."Vain about your appearance? Probably these will go. Paul was the same but his face looks clear now and the small amount of male hair just fell off him when he washed. Try it yourself." I pulled at the hair on my chest and it came away with virtually no sting. When I rubbed my arm the long male hairs stripped from that too. I slanted and turned the mirror to see my groin. It was easier than looking down on it past the two full mounds of my breasts. The woman in the mirror was slim, with a slender waist, but wide hips. Her breasts were generous but perfectly shaped, and tipped with pink nipples. Her legs began at slim thighs, tapering to delicate knees, shapely calves, neat ankles and small feet. I turned slightly. The image had a curved female rear, but it balanced the rest of her figure. She would have looked entirely like a woman but for one thing, her dark hair was too short. I scowled at the image, a little in awe at its beauty, yet angry that the spell had happened to me. I had no intention of staying as a woman. However, Paul had become quite a beautiful young woman too. I expected she would be pleased with the result. I hoped she would like attracting men's attention. "Well, I suppose, Paul, you'd better get a woman's name. Joannina, what do you think is appropriate?" She shook her head. "That's for Paul to decide." Paul's face lit up. "I would like something simple, like Maria," he said. "All right, Maria it shall be. Joannina, do you like that?" I asked. "Maria? Yes, that's suitable," said Joannina. "So the confused young man called Paul no longer exists. In his place there is a young woman called Maria." She embraced and kissed Maria. "You wanted a new life. The beginnings of a lovely young woman were in Paul waiting to burst out, then be developed and nurtured. Now we have a chance to do that. I am going to help you." "Joannina" I said "I want to thank you for caring for us but I have to ask something else. Please, can I stay here for a few more days until I can change back?" "'That is a good idea. You need to get your strength but I have some bad news. The new authorities are looking for you. Somehow the word of your spells and cures has got out and the Church has accused you of being a necromancer. A bunch of Mark's rowdies ransacked your house last night and burned it. All your possessions are gone." I held my head in my hands and cried out in frustration but on thinking about it I actually had not lost much. Any money I had I always carried it with me. We had only minimal furnishings, our beds had been simple and so were our cooking utensils. Any male clothes I had left there would no longer fit me anyway so they were no great loss. Still, I was without a home. Probably my most important possession was the book and I had that with me too but I would now definitely have to leave as soon as I could. Again I thought of further east, to Zernos, where some Genorians had gone several generations before. "So, Merones, you had better stay here until things quieten down. I don't think anyone noticed you coming here and of course, no one will know you now. But still, when you go out you will be noticed as a stranger here and could be questioned. So you need a good background story. I will say that you and Maria are distant relatives from Constantinople. There's still enough boats trading along the coast so people won't think it too strange. Just try to use the right accent. "Oh yes, you will need a woman's name too. Just in case anyone asks." She raised her eyebrows. "All right, I'll use Constantia." Joannina was very generous and gave us food and shelter. She did not even ask for any money from us. It took some time to get used to my new body. My size and shape had changed drastically but I did not want to wear clothes that were particularly female. Usually I just wore a long gown whose style could have belonged to either sex and Joannina left me mostly to my own devices. Maria got a more intense treatment. Joannina immediately began to treat her as a girl, starting her with female clothes and supervising all parts of Maria's life, behavior, her appearance, her manners, her walk, and even the way she sat, all the things expected of a girl. She often advised Maria on her grooming and how to do her hair. Our hair had grown longer since we came to Genoria, but it was still much shorter than the style Genorian women wore theirs in so Joannina gave us head coverings to wear when we were out. Maria decorated hers. I just kept mine plain. Maria was actually a willing participant, but in the first days she got tired with the continual instruction and complained. Joannina was a stern but loving mistress and Maria's protests fell on mostly deaf ears. She was firm. "That is the way a woman lives," she would insist. "You wanted to be a woman. So you need to learn so no one asks about you. I am teaching you." She did not ever mention Maria's past at all. It was as if an untrained girl had simply appeared on her doorstep. Joannina's servants had been sworn to secrecy. "You will find it strange at first, Maria. Your body is wonderfully changed but how you think, how you react, your manners, and your interests will have to change too. You will have to suppress away most of your previous male attitudes. I know you did not feel like most men when you were growing up but there is a lot to learn. You are missing the memories of growing up a girl, playing with other girls, using dolls and playing girl's games." I thought it was ironic that Paul had thought of these things too. "You are now almost nineteen, you say. That means you are missing an enormous amount that a young woman of that age would have experienced. You have grown up to see or feel your body changing, or find your hips and rear swelling or your breasts budding. You haven't yet had the monthly bleeding that shows you are a woman but I imagine that will come too. "You have not felt the pride a young woman would have when she is first allowed to wear adult women's clothing, to show to everybody that you have become a woman, her rite of passage. "Then there are all the domestic things a girl and then woman would have been exposed to since she was a child. For instance, you have not had any training in housekeeping, or helping to raise children. You have no experience of preparing meals, washing clothes and caring for a house. I have some servants here but like most women, I am proud of my home and I still do much work myself." Actually Joannina was wrong there. Maybeour standards would not have been up to her own but as monks we continually had to do our share in monastery activities and life. "One other thing, you are almost nineteen. Most young woman your age would already be married. Maybe you have some catching up to do. You need to learn how to act around men. Maybe I should introduce you to some suitable young men." I even heard Maria's gulp. Joannina embraced her. "If you get to be like most young women you will like men. That is good because men will be attracted to a pretty girl like you. Remember that men and women have different roles in life. That is why our bodies are so different." I was sitting in the library making notes on more Genoria history when I heard Joannina give Maria her first lesson on cosmetics. "Maria, I think it's time you got more practise on the use of cosmetics and perfume. They will enhance your looks. You are lucky that you are so beautiful but a little use of cosmetics helps too. Egyptian women like them. The Byzantine empresses and nobility used cosmetics too." She sighed. "I am getting so that I don't bother so much but my daughters certainly decorate themselves." "Now first. You have a nice complexion. But let me just put a trace of red colour for your lips and a little l color on your cheeks to emphasize your pretty cheekbones. There! How do you like that?" I only heard a grunt, but it sounded like approval and I heard an intensive discussion on Maria's eye makeup, then hairstyles. I heard Joannina laugh. "This reminds me of when I was a girl, experimenting with cosmetics with my friends, and then helping my own daughters." Maria may have sighed at the preparations, but her reluctance was only half hearted and when Joannina was done Maria proudly ran through to me and twirled to show off her face and clothes. Joannina had given Maria some of her brightly patterned silks and brocades. She was even wearing some jewellery, amber beads at her neck, enamelled bracelets on her wrists and jewelled pins in her hair. I complimented her. I was pleased for her. The young woman was beautiful and much happier. I wondered what life had for her. Over the following weeks I watched, half intrigued, as Joannina, as she had promised, further molded her pupil into a young woman in all respects, in learning household tasks, in her mannerisms and how she walked and sat and her speech. Then there was her dress, getting Maria to accept the longer and more restrictive robes of women but also to enjoy the textures and colours of the fabrics and the subtle variety of styles. I was in two minds about other effects of Maria's transformation. I was glad for her, but she began to spend more and more time with Joannina and less with me. Maria, as Paul, and I had been close companions but now I was increasingly by myself and with my own thoughts and I began to feel isolated. Maria had become immersed in learning her woman's life but I was still not interested. Then, three or so weeks after the spell Maria had her first woman's monthly bleeding and mine followed a day later. She accepted it, maybe even welcomed it but I hated it. I came to realize that I wanted my male body back and to get away as soon as I could. I still had the spell book but I was not confident enough to go out to use it. My female form was a good disguise, but I did not want to get re- established as a healer and risk suspicion in this new regime. To pass the time, I spent a lot of time in Joannina's extensive library scanning the history, especially for information on the ancient Genorians, and their cult of Ishtar. I was delighted when I unearthed another old book in the old language and I could practice it more. I was becoming quite an expert in it. When Paul and I lived together, we had prepared meal for ourselves and cared for the house, minimal and crude as it was. Maria took easily to helping Joannina prepare our meals and helping with the housework in our more elaborate accommodation. By a few weeks Maria had also had taken easily to caring for her looks, dress and grooming, and become completely skilled. Joannina pushed me to do the same and occasionally out of curiosity I let her fuss around me and even let her dress me in more colourful and stylish women's clothes. When she had finished she put a mirror in front of me. "Don't you like it? You are beautiful too!" I shrugged. She was right. The spell had made me into a beautiful woman but I really was not interested in my appearance or clothes. Altogether it was too much fuss and bother. She sighed."All right, Constantia. I can see you are not really interested. Look, Constantia, have you thought of what is ahead for you when you leave here?" Her voice sounded more brusque. I suddenly felt guilty. "I'm sorry," I blurted. "I'm taking advantage of your hospitality." "Oh no, its not that." She shook her head. "I'm happy to help you but it's just that I have a beautiful young woman in front of me. Not as young as Maria, but still, an elegible young woman. It's a pity to waste that. But you have shown almost no interest in your dress or appearance. You are attractive too. Would you not like to get out and meet young men? Or I could invite some here?" "Joannina, please, I don't want to. I think I want to change back to a man when I can." "Don't you like your female body?" I shrugged. "It is different in so many ways, some good, others not so good, but I supposed I am used to it now. But I know I would not like to live with a man, I mean as a woman. You see, Joannina, even when I was a man I was not too interested in women. I suppose a monk's life was a good calling for me. Now as a woman, I have almost no interest in attracting men either . And then, if I was with a man. married to one, I would have to accept his .. attentions.- you know what I mean. I could get pregnant, then bear children. I'd have to look after them. I don't want that." Joannina took my hands. "That is for you to decide, but I was born a woman. I think how fortunate I was to enjoy the company of other girls. When I was growing up we played with each other and showed off our pretty dresses to each other. Then later it was becoming a woman and getting the attentions of young men, flirting, finding my taste, then finally falling in love and getting married. I have birthed three children. That was hard work, but the most rewarding thing I have done. I feel fulfilled. Now I see Maria accepting her role too, looking forward to life as a woman and she is supremely happy. Don't you think you could be too?" I thought for a minute. "I don't think so. " You have been very good to me and I am very grateful. Maybe it would even work if I really tried to work hard at a woman's way of life as you suggest but I really don't think it's for me. In fact I wonder why I should try them at all as I have come to the decision that it is time I left Genoria and resumed a man's body and existence. Here, in a woman's body, I feel restricted and I want to be free to explore." Joannina looked at me sadly. "It is your life, Constantia. I see the old footloose Merones has not left you, despite your new body. You still have too much restlessness in your character. I only hope it will lead you to happiness." However, after several more weeks and getting increasingly bored, I gradually started getting out and about, usually along with Joannina and Maria. With just a little attention to dress and minimal cosmetics I was totally unrecognizable as the former male Merones. Joannina still had hopes for me. I think, but I only used the clothes for disguise. I still felt wary on our outings but Maria needed no persuasion to go along with Joannina on her little visits to the bazaars or merchants or to visit to her daughters and friends. Joannina just described us as the daughters of an old friend in Constantinople who had come to visit. We had to be fairly careful. Mark Palekaris' rule was not unpopular at first, but he began to lose favour with the Genorians when he made regulations 'to preserve public morals' as Joannina said. This involved shutting down the two brothels operating in Genoria, then he started restricting taverns. He even attempted to regulate women's dress, without success fortunately, and finally set curfew hours as the grumbling of the inhabitants increased. His policies meant too I had to be very careful how I used the book. Yes, I had gradually started using it again at Joanina's pleading, first for one of her granddaughters in her first pregnancy, then to cure a hunchbacked boy, a club footed girl, and a woman badly scarred by fire. Now that I had a purpose I was more confident about getting out. In my travels I began to hear comments about Mark and I commented on it to Joannina. "Mark will be losing the support of the people." "He already has, quite a bit. More and more citizens are calling for the return of Nicholas." "Where is he?" "He lives quietly on his farm up by the hills. He keeps protesting that he has absolutely no wish to return to power. Mind you, that may be for his safety. Mark is a bit jealous of his own power. I think Nicholas might just be persuaded." She was right. In another month Joannina arranged a visit by Nicholas to meet several influential citizens. When they were finished the meeting she took him aside and told him about Maria and me and my use of the book. His eyes opened wide and he started to object but she calmed him down. "I do not like the idea of magic," he said finally, "but I will keep quiet." "You never know. Perhaps Constantia may be able to help you." Joannina said. Nicholas was sceptical and I rolled my eyes but I certainly had no idea how at the time. But there was another shock one day. We were told that a larger ship from Constantinople had come into the harbour and we watched apprehensively as a group of twenty Templars disembarked, all heavily armed and with horses. They would be a powerful force and Genoria did not have enough trained men to resist them if they were after plunder. Worse, we saw Mark and some of his supporters at the harbour to welcome them. So he had sensed that his rule was becoming unpopular and must have called for help from Constantinople. Nicholas had been watching too and shook his head. "So my successor has called on the Crusaders for help. That means there will be few here who want support him now. These men are the same ones who looted here once before. I wonder what Mark promised them this time in exchange for their help. Now they are here they will probably look for anything they missed earlier and if they think they don't get enough, they will take their frustration out with more destruction. We have little enough left. They will also be wanting food and accommodation like the last time and guess who will have to supply it? It looks as if they will even be lodged at the palace. Mark wants to sweep away the old days but he is playing a dangerous game." Then, as we watched the men mount their horses and take the short ride to the palace, I had a shock of recognition and it reminded me I had a score to settle for an old injury. One knight been wearing a hood against the cool wind off the sea and when he threw it off I saw the red hair of Raymonde deGaladier, the red bearded Templar who had made an attempt on my life, killed my fellow monks Jerome and Bartholomew, and insulted the old woman. I remembered that she had once wished that he would become a woman. I had an idea. Perhaps I could now grant the old woman her wish. As Nicholas had thought, the knights simply appropriated a part of the old palace for their quarters while their ship remained moored in the harbour to take any loot back to Constantinople. That was good. I needed them the knights all in one place. As Nicholas had thought, they had all demanded food too and we watched as groups of conscripted Genorian girls brought in the food. I took Nicholas aside. "Nicholas. I once said that I might be able to help you. I think that time is now." "What do you mean?" "I have an idea, but in case I am unsuccessful, it's better you don't know. Hopefully you will see the results later. But tonight, have your supporters outside the palace." I waited until the serving girls had left and the men were all busy at their meal and drinking then I sneaked into the palace and hid behind a screen. One of Mark's guards was sympathetic to us and ushered me in. Unfortunately the space was narrow and when I tried to get settled the screen scraped over the tiled floor. I flinched at the screech it made and tried to get out but it was too late. The screen was pushed aside and I found myself looking up at deGaladier. "Who are you? What are you doing here, girl?" he asked. He was speaking in French but I was supposed to be a Genorian woman. I shook my head as if I did not understand and he asked again in crude Greek, louder this time. "Nothing, sir," I mumbled. "I just wanted to see the knights." I tried some flattery. "They just look so proud and magnificent." I noted that his face had a scar. The result of his encounter with my staff back in Constantinople, I hoped. But I saw a gleam in his eyes and he pulled my cloak from me, exposing my face fully. "Oh, a pretty one!" I tried to pull back but he took hold of the neck of my gown and as I tried to pull away from him it ripped, exposing the top of my breasts. He gave a feral smile and I shrank back further. He pulled my gown again and I was naked to the waist. I was about to scream when we were interrupted by another knight. "What is it, Raymonde?" he asked. It was clear deGaladier did not like being interrupted but he threw the remnants of my gown over me and gave an annoyed scowl. "Ah, just a nosy Genorian woman." He gave me a backhanded slap and turned and left me huddled in the corner. The nearer knights were laughing at my half nakedness. I pretended to be embarrassed and pulled the screen in front of me again. My face was stinging but I uncovered my book, turned to the right page for the spell that made men into women, waited until the knights sounded as if they were well into their meal again and I cried out the transformation spell as fast and as loud as I could. I don't know if the knights heard my voice, in the general hubbub of their eating and conversation but as I finished the room had become silent. I heard them mutter among themselves then as the noise increased again I crept from my hiding place to escape. I had made it as far as the vestibule when a man stood in front of me. It was deGaladier again. "Noisy woman, interrupting us!" he dragged me to a corner and he pulled my gown completely from me so I was totally naked. I held my hands over my breasts and my groin. He began to unfasten his clothing. "Please, sir," I pleaded. "You are a warrior. But a monk too!" "What of it? You need a lesson!" He snorted contemptuously but he caught sight of the book lying by me and picked it up. "What's this?" Then I saw his eyes grow larger as he opened it. Perhaps he recognized the symbols. "Where did you get this?" he hissed. He slapped my face and took my wrist, as if to drag me in front of the others but he stopped as if a cold blast had hit him. "You she-devil," he gasped in realization and drew back his hand to strike me again but he was stopped by another spell of shivering. In seconds he sank to his knees and slowly collapsed onto the stone floor. His eyes stared at me, terror stricken. He struggled to get back up but his legs would not obey him. "You recognise the words?" I hissed to him. "You are going to experience their work. I hope you enjoy your new life. This is for an old woman," and I kicked him as hard as I could." This is for Brother Jerome!" I kicked him again. "This is for Brother Bartholomew," I said and drew back my foot again but he had become unconscious. I watched until his body began to shake and shimmer. So he would be yet another who would take the spell. I had only felt a slight frisson. I stepped over him and looked back into the hall. Many alarmed cries had started, in less than a minute subsiding to some moans, then only gasps and finally silence. The spell had worked its effect on them too. Only two knights were still upright and these sank to the floor in a minute. It had been close but I had done what I wanted to. I pulled my cloak over me and ran outside to where Nicholas, Maria, and Joannina were waiting with armed citizens. "It is done. You can see to them." I pulled my cloak more carefully about myself as they stared at the chaos, incredulous. Templars lying over the tables in the ruins of their meal or on the floor. Already most were shaking and beginning to change. We stripped them and waited for some hours, marvelling at the changes until all the knights had gone completely through them and changed into women. I had experienced the spell but this was the first time I had watched it. All were quite attractive too although two, including deGaladier, had died under the spell. They had been well on their way to being women when they suddenly went rigid, relaxed and stopped breathing. So deGaladier had died as a woman as the old woman had once wished. A group brought a struggling Mark Palekaris before us. He was completely bewildered. "So what will we do with him? "asked Nicholas. "Change him too " said Joannina. I handed the book to her. "How would you like to use it? Nicholas, you had better leave for a few minutes." In a few minutes Mark was showing the first effects of the spell and was stripped and set with the unconscious women who had been the knights. We called other citizens to help, bundled the survivors into carts and rolled them to the harbor. "We have cargo for you," shouted Nicholas to the ship's captain. "You can take it back to Constantinople." He threw some coins, taken from a knight. "This will pay their passage." "Who are these?" asked the captain. "These are women. Why are they naked!" he protested when we carried the women aboard. " Where are the knights?" "The knights wanted to plunder us, but we had a sorceress change them to women and we want them out of here." Nicholas tipped out the contents of a cart. "There are their swords and armor too. Take them all back to Constantinople and tell them there that such a fate waits for all who would plunder our city. If you do not want them throw them overboard or sell them in some slave market. You have one hour to depart or we will attack and burn your ship. Muttering, captain rushed from the thwarts. We heard orders shouted and the vessel unfurled its sail and set out to sea. We were rid of the Templars but we kept the horses. They were strong beasts and would be useful around Genoria. "Contantia? Merones?" Nicholas laughed. "You have preserved our city. I admit I mistrusted your spells but they have saved us. Please forgive me. You may stay here unmolested as an honoured citizen." I shook my head. "Thank you, but I think my time here is done." I was more than ready to leave. Joannina said that through a friend she was able to contact the captain of a small boat trading between the Caucasus and Constantinople. We met the captain on his voyage west and, with the promise of two gold coins, arranged that on his return in some weeks, he would take me east towards the Caucasus. I had sighed when I saw it was the same old captain that I had seen before but at least he had a newer boat, but again he had put old Genorian symbols at its bows. His name was Mardus My plan was that I would embark as a woman, but once hidden away in a cabin I would use the reverse spell. Then, I would emerge after two days as a man, I hoped. I expected that the reverse spell would have the same severe effect as the first, and I did not look forward to it but it had to be done. It was in my mind that at some future time I might be able to modify the spell to make it less severe. Finally I would be landed on the Black Sea shore near the city of Zernos. There were risks. I might simply be thrown overboard but Joannina assured me that Mardus was honest, so three weeks later, when it returned to Genoria, I prepared to embark. It was a small party that saw me off. Joannina, her friend who knew the captain, and Maria. The young woman looked absolutely lovely in her brocaded gown. Her hair was still short but swept up into an elaborate headdress. She was entirely feminine. Then I saw a young man who had been standing apart casually walk over to her and she slid her arm into his. I raised my eyebrows. "I did not expect that." Joannina laughed. "Constantia, You have been so busy thinking about your own plans that you did not notice that Maria had a friend come to call on her? And I think our beautiful young woman is enjoying the attention. The young man is called Alexius. " I wish you success in the future, I mean when you become Merones again. I want to thank you again for what you did for my grandson. Yes, and what you have done for Maria. And me! And Genoria! Be safe." She embraced me. Maria came up to me shyly and embraced me. "Merones, my best wishes to you. I can't thank you enough for working out the contents of the book. The spell has made me I am happier than ever I have been." She embraced me and kissed me on the cheek but then turned and snuggled into the young man. I felt a tear at my eye and I turned and quickly walked on board the ship. Almost immediately it cast off and the gap between it and the wharf grew wider and wider. I waved to my friends as the distance grew between us. Then the ship was out of the harbour, soon past a headland and they and the city were lost to view. Mardus interrupted my thoughts. "You use the name Constantia, but I think there is some mystery there. What now?" "This is a small boat but I need a space to myself, very private. Keep your crew away from me. You have been told what I am going to do, and I will get started right away. Just now I have a woman's body but I will wake as a man and it would be best for all if am not disturbed while this happens. I have been told this voyage should take some days so I hope to reappear before you dock." He shrugged. "A strange business, and I am uncomfortable with such magic! But you paid me well." He had given me a small cabin hardly bigger than a cupboard with just enough room to lie down in. Just in case I would be thirsty, I gulped down a large drink of water first, then loosened my robe, pulled out the book and read the reverse spell. It was short too, about as long as the first spell. I lay back waiting for its effect, wondering what I would do if it was unsuccessful, even wondering if it would kill me. Then, a minute or so later, the change began as a tingling in my belly, spreading out over all of my body, increasing until I felt I was burning with a fever. The tiny cabin became stifling hot. I became so weak I could not have moved from the floor. Finally I fell unconscious. It was like the first spell and I awoke only gradually. My mouth was parched dry, and my body hurt all over. I was gasping, groaning in discomfort and I tried to concentrate. I forced my eyes open and gradually became aware of the floor moving and I remembered I was on a boat. I remembered what I had attempted and I felt at my chest. I heaved a sigh of relief when I felt a flat male chest. My breasts were gone and even the nipples had shrunk. Apprehensive, I put my hand between my legs and gave another sigh of relief. My penis and scrotum were restored, sore and tender to the touch, but they were back. I held up my hands and squinted at them. They were now male sized hands on sinewy and muscled arms. I had grown too. My small cabin had been just adequate for a woman. Now my male body was hunched up in the space, even more cramped. I gradually sat up and shifted to allow me to straighten my legs, groaning as I did so, but in a man's voice. So the reverse spell had worked there too. I lay for a while breathing deeply, feeling the pain gradually lessen. Some time later I pushed myself to my knees, then upright, as far as the cramped hold of the boat would allow. With another deep breath I pushed open the door to my space and stepped through but with a sudden roll of the boat I overbalanced and fell on the boards with a cry. I looked up to see Mardus bent over me. "So, you are awake." He looked me up and down. "I remember you. You were the clerk who was very interested in the old language. Well, well! But you only look half alive. Hmm, you are well changed. You warned me this would happen but it is a shock to see magic actually at work. How do you feel?" I breathed deeply. "A bit weak but feeling better all the time." "You got this magic from old Genoria?" "Yes, I got some help from the archives and even from a little boat of your's. You remember? Then I gave it a lot of study so I could use the spells. Where are we now?" "Still at sea. It's getting dark so we will anchor soon, near to land. Then we'll have another full day at sea and the day after that we should reach our destination. The wind is with us." He felt at my brow. "You still feel a bit hot. You had better take something to drink. Are you hungry?" "Not yet," I said. He brought me some water and I gulped it down and when he handed me a piece of flat bread I ate it ravenously too. "All right, I think you need some fresh air. Come on. I'll help you up," and he supported me as I staggered up to the deck and the cool breeze. It took a full day to recover and longer to get used again to a male body. It actually felt strange after having lived as a woman for some months. I was weak and would have to take things easy. At some time in the future I would have to investigate to see if the spell could be modified to make the transitions easier. "Over there, Merones!" Mardus pointed to mountainous masses on the eastern horizon almost hidden in the haze. It was two days after I woke up. "These are the Caucasus Mountains and there's where we are heading. There's a little port called Peraga. You are going to Zernos, I believe. It's about a day's walk inland from the port." "That looks like smoke, " I commented some time later. Looking to the east I saw a small smudge of smoke against the bulk of the mountains. Mardus peered into the haze. "You're right. That could be about where Zernos is situated. I wonder what's caused the fire?" He sucked in his breath. "You know, I heard that the Mongol invaders are heading this way. These are fierce mounted warriors from the east. They have already captured and sacked many cities in Persia and this may be next." He shook his head." I just hope.... Merones, you had better be very careful if you are heading to Zernos." "I have to go there." As the ship drew nearer to the land the smoke seemed to disappear and I persuaded myself there was nothing to worry about. Peraga was a mean crude looking fishing village, small compared even to Genoria, and I looked askance at its wharf, only a little better than a pile of logs lashed together. But I gathered my few possessions and disembarked anyway. I could not go back. Mardus took my hand and pointed. "Head to that cleft in the foothills and go along the valley. There is a path, of sorts. Then the valley will split into two branches. Take the left one. The land rises quite steeply at first to a pass but eventually it starts to slope down. Carry on in that direction and in a day you will suddenly see level land with Zernos lying below you in a bend of the river. Good fortune there, Merones. And try to avoid the Mongols." It was as he said and the valley split but after that the path was hard going and I spent an uncomfortable night shivering in the shelter of an uprooted tree. In the morning I made my way down from the pass and when the valley suddenly opened up I saw the city of Zernos nestled by the river in the plain below. I walked for an hour or so more and finally climbed a small hill to see the lie of the land. I was well above the city, but overlooking it and near enough to see it well, even people below me. But something caught my eyes. In contrast to the city's quite appearance there were hordes of mounted men moving around it, following strange primitive looking banners then they suddenly gathered together. I heard their shouts and even the strains of weird sounding instruments. In an hour they had formed into a line and begun heading away from the city. From my vantage point I saw that some areas of the city had actually been touched by fire, leaving ugly dark stains on the white buildings. The captain had been right. It looked as if Zernos had felt the force of the Mongols and fallen to them. At least it did not look as if much had been destroyed. I watched carefully, but there were no sign of any more smoke and the Mongols were actually well to the north and almost out of sight. It looked as if the defenders had been wise and had opened their gates to the Mongols. They would have been plundered, and possibly some Mongols would be left as a garrison but probably most of the citizens' lives would have been spared. I sat down and thought of my options. It was dangerous, but I could not go back. My curiosity was driving me too much. I had to go to the city. Still, the city's capture would have been accompanied by bloodshed and injuries. There would be work for a physician like me. END