The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)S11: E02: Chelsea Ferguson (34), From Chelmsford free porn video

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This week, we start the show with establishing shots of the most boring suburban estate you could ever hope to see. Lots of ‘nice’ double story semi-detached homes, each with their own little square of grass and concrete driveway out front, separated from the public footpath by low brick walls.

We can see a chunky, out of breath looking man walking along the street toward us, perky, elegant and mean-looking Doberman by his side ... This week’s host – the love-him-or-hate-him Cockney geezer – Dennis Baxter.

He announces his presence in a loud, gruff Cockney accent, showing plenty of excitement for the day ahead as her talks. “Hello, and welcome to another episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ ... I’m Dennis Baxter, and this is my boy Casanova the Third ... And this week we’ve made the short drive to Chelmsford in Essex – to meet a lady who knows how to have fun, and wants to take things to another level with my boy here...”

We turn to face a particularly boring semi-detached house ... The front door opens and a brunette steps into view – she’s half-wearing a white dress that’s so short we can almost see her panties, and so wide open at the front that can see almost all of her 38C boobs, her nipples barely covered by the sides. There’s little left to the imagination - her body is curvy but not fat, her flesh nicely tanned. Looking up she gives us a self-confident smirk as we hear her introducing herself in voice-over. Her accent hard and confident.

“My name’s Chelsea Ferguson, and I’m 34 years of age. I’m from Chelmsford in Essex, and I’m a dirty slut!”

She raises a hand and crooks a finger toward us, coaxing us to follow her into the house ... And who are we to refuse?

We cut to a shot of Dennis, looking down at his dog, then into the camera, then tipping his head toward the house – “Come on then...” – he sets off up the garden pathway with his loyal dog by his side...

In the bedroom, with Chelsea kneeling on the bed, her knees wide, that dress still draped over her, barely covering points of interest. She moves around in a suggestive and apparently excited manner – in her head she appears to be already riding our dog. We can’t see the dog, but he whines occasionally throughout the interview, clearly keen to get up on that bed and play with his new bitch.

Dennis stands beside the bed, Casanova standing beside him. “First things first, before you tell us your story ... We’ve got to address this ... Chelsea? What kind of a name is Chelsea?” His distain for the west end of London and one of the biggest clubs in English football quite clear in the tone of his voice.

Our guest laughs, “Yeah ... I don’t think it’s anything to do wif football ... You don’t ‘ave to worry...”

Dennis reacts with an almost disappointed tone... “Ooooh, that’s a bit of a leftdaan ... We don’t like uvva London clubs ... Cas always gives it a little bit more, just to make them pay!”

Chelsea laughs again, “Oh, in that case...” She attempts to mimic a football chant, “Chelsea – Chelsea ... Chelsea – Chelsea...”

“Alright then ... Tell us your story so this big boy can teach you a lesson with his fucking huge cock!”

We close in on her, getting a better look at her face as her smile broadens. She’s pretty, but with a harsh edge. Pointed nose, strong cheek-bones, a narrow mouth with thin lips. Too much make-up ... And when she speaks, her mouth is all over the place – lower jaw moving almost sideways rather than open and shut. It’s almost as distracting as her tits...

She continually refers to ‘we’, but she’s the only one here.

“We’ve been swingin’ for a couple of years now ... We’ve got our nice little group, just three couples, and we love to have fun together ... One of the other girls tried to get her dog involved at one of our get-togethers, but he didn’t have a clue ... I don’t think she knew you have to train dogs for that ... But it was so exciting – trying it ... Just finkin’ about it ... So we decided it would be fun to have some genuine talent there for the next get-together we host ... And I fought, I might get the jump on the rest of ‘em ... Get a bit of practise in, like! And that’s why you’re here...”

She brings her fingers down the front of her dress and hooks it around the outside of her impressive boobs. Considering we know what she’s about to do, it shouldn’t be that impressive – but a good pair of amateur boobs being exposed is always a nice start to a show!

“You mentioned ‘we’ a few times there...” Notes Dennis, leaving the comment hanging for our guest to explain...

“Yeah ... My husband, Lee...”

“And where’s Lee today? Didn’t he want to be here to see this?” Checks our gruff host.

Chelsea rises and falls again, excitable. “I’m sure Lee would love to be here, if ‘e knew ... But sometimes it’s nice to ‘ave a little secret ... Being ‘ere would turn ‘im on...” She’s moved a hand to one of those lovely tits, and the other is down between her thighs as she talks. “But me telling him about it later on will drive him crazy!” She smiles at the thought, then adds, “And then we can watch it together, and we’ll have another turn-on ... And then I can do it infront of him, and it’s ANOTHER turn-on ... So he gets to be turned on four times instead of once!”

“You’ve got this all figured out...” Confirms Dennis.

“Yeah ... I’m an expert at turning him on!” She smiles. “It’s my job...! And I love my job!!”

There’s a little pause as our guest continues to ride her hand, looking off to the floor to the side of our camera – at our off-camera canine star ... The only thing we can hear is his heavy breathing and occasional whines, then Dennis changes up the pace... “In that case ... I think it’s time for you to get to work!”

Chelsea smiles, happy to move things along, and ‘stands’ upright on her knees – taking the bottom of the dress and pulling it up over her body and head, confirming that she’s not wearing any panties, and that her pussy is shaved completely bald. Her belly almost flat – but not hard. Her boobs we’ve already seen – full and round.

“All right then – I’m ready...” She states confidently, a crooked smile crossing her sharp jaw, “Bring me that fucking gorgeous Doberman!” She’s already reaching her hands out to the side of the bed, summoning her co-star...

The sleek black beast bounds into frame, a couple of short steps and then onto the bed as if it was only a jump of couple of inches rather than almost two feet. He rushes her, pushing up against her – head against her beautiful chest, turning sides to push her backward onto her heels.

She’s not at all intimidated by him – pointed face, open mouth and sharp teeth ... Reaching out to push at him playfully, stroking his neck, back and sides. “Who’s a big boy? Who’s a big boy? Eh?” Looking off sideways to Dennis (off camera) and adding, “He better be a ‘big’ boy...” with a little laugh.

“Oh, ‘e’s a big boy, don’t you worry about that...” Confirms Dennis.

She lets her hands run down his sides and over his back, letting him push up against her – his flank against her belly, the underside of her boobs pretty much resting on his back. Stretching on arm over him, around his belly, to reach his heavy sheath and fondle. “Come on ... Let me feel that gorgeous cock of yours!”

He’s standing there, looking around to Dennis, then up to Chelsea’s face, caught between wanting to just jump her, and enjoying the way she’s stroking him. Leaning a bit further forward, boobs squashing down against his spine, rubbing against the fur as she reaches around further and jerks his shaft within the hairy sheath, exposing the tip of his cock ... Making him bend his back and jerk a little at her hand... “Yeah ... Fuck my hand ... OOoohhh ... You dirty boy ... Getting excited, eh?” She snarls. “Ready to fuck your bitch?”

She tips her head forward as she snarls, bringing her face down to his – licking the air toward him ... Tempting him – taunting him – to lick back at her ... Which he does – just a couple of careful ‘test’ licks ... The first missing her completely, the second just catching her pursed lips...

We think we’re about to witness another face licking session, but Casanova is over stimulated by the hand around his shaft, his cock growing rapidly until there is suddenly three or four inches on show – he’s already ready for action, and he’s not a patient beast ... He breaks away, fucking the air, his cock on show under his belly ... Staggering around the bed...

As he moves away, our guest ‘over balances’, ‘falling’ forward onto her hands so that she’s suddenly on all fours. “Oooopps! I’ve fallen...” She gasps, looking up into the camera as she says it to confirm that she was in full control of her ‘fall’.

Casanova recognises that she’s ready – leaning forward, arse up, legs apart, pussy exposed ... Here we go! He moves around behind her, bouncing from foot to foot on the soft mattress, already beginning the mount before he’s fully behind her ... She’s fully primed, ready to start, keen as fuck... “Fuck me ... Come on ... Ohhh yeaasss! Now ... Fuck me...”

He’s on her back, his chest over her arse, but his cock lined-up with her hip rather than her hole ... Wrapping his front legs around her waist, shuffling those hindlegs, stepping over her calves ... Slowly staggering into position, trying to fuck her the whole time...

She’s giggling and laughing, calling him a “Silly cunt...” and telling him to, “Try harder ... Come on ... I want my doggy cock!”

Then he’s behind her, in position, pulling himself in close with his front legs, wrapping them around her thighs and under her crotch ... Thrusting at her cunt...

We cut down to a close-up – looking up between their legs – watching as he bashes the flat tip of his cock against her meaty pussy lips ... Against ... Between... “Ohh fFFFUUCCCCKKK! Yes YESS YEESSSS!” She screams – louder than most of our girls, this slut knows how to let the world know she’s having fun.

Back to the wide angle to see it ... Her open-mouthed smile, the dialogue continuing, “Fuck my CUNT ... FUCK ME! YEAAAHHH!” as he pummels her with his ugly, long, canine cock. His belly slapping up against her round arse. Legs wrapped around her ... His head up, mouth closed, looking like a streamlined, pointy-nosed perverted sex missile ... Under her, those lovely tits of hers hang down and jiggle under the assault. “FUCK FUCK YEEEAAAHHH!!”

The natural tendency for first time dog-fuckers is to start on the hands, then drop to the elbows, but Chelsea’s taken plenty of poundings from behind, and she handles the balancing job of staying in the classic four-point stance as the dog thumps into her ... Her titties wobbling under her as she is fucked hard... “Fuck my pussy ... Yeah ... Oh ... Fuck me ... Fuck mee...”

Another low-angle close-up of her pussy shows that fat shaft slipping in and out of her body – spreading her pussy lips, filling her up, then sliding backwards before being launched back deep inside her. Fast. Wet. Hot.

Back to a close-up of her face – looking right into camera, snarling and whispering now – playing to the lens and the close-up microphone, almost whispering, “So good ... So fucking good ... I love it ... I love iiiiiiit!”

We cut back to a side angle, a clear view of her boobies swinging as the sleek monster pumps up against her round behind, his paws wrapped around her, his head up ... In profile he’s towering over her – and he clearly thinks he owns her. Right now, he does.

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We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures... Now we’re looking at a sandy beach on a perfect summer’s day – small waves rolling...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e7 Siobhan

Series 4, Episode 7: SIOBHAN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Now we’re in the middle of a busy food-court - restaurants...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e1 Sammy Murty

We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a perverted version of Supergirl ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea level over the Severn Estuary, between Wales (with a cartoonish huge flag waving on the coast, and the south-west coast of England, with...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e10 Alison Latham

Series 5, Episode 10: Alison Latham (47) – Wolverhampton We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then our very cartoonish, top heavy and slutty caricature of Charley appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” Then she waves for us to follow her, turns and skydives toward the country below at...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e7 Effat Hassan 41

Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e3 Rebecca

“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e7 Asha

Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e02 Hiruni Jayasinghe 41 from West Bromwich

We’re back on our Stage 1 at our studio ‘complex’. The room is dark, but in the middle of the floor there’s a single steel-framed bed in a pool of light from a couple of spotlights. The bed is as basic as it gets – a steel frame, old bedstead. It looks vaguely rusty and pretty dirty (as it should – two weeks ago it was on a scrapheap in Rochdale). An old mattress sits on of the frame, the mattress looks soft and lumpy, and its cover is bordering on threadbare. We move around the bed, looking...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E17 Eva Ahn 33 from Motherwell

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess12e07 Cora Toney 25 from Newcastle

We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12 E20 Eva Straskova 30 from Notting Hill London

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e5 Andrea

Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e8 Patricia

Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e13 AnneMarie Silverwood

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e6 Maria

Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e6 Simone Butt 27 pig lover

Series 8, Episode 6: Simone Butt (27), from Bristol We open with an establishing shot of an impressive, modern brick and glass façade of a six-story office block on a busy street. Very clean, under a clear blue sky. We can see a figure approaching along the pavement, a slim lady with blonde hair. She’s wearing ripped blue jeans and a tight t-shirt, and her nice round boobs bounce on every step. It’s our Polish princess, Petra – and this week there’s no sign of her lovely Labrador. She...

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