The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)S13E17: Eva Ahn (33), From Motherwell free porn video

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We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks...

The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day...

We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark.

And then our host steps into frame ... This week it’s our former pornstar from Blackburn – the dimpled dimbo, the brunette bimbo – Renae Russell, whose cute looks and sexy figure never cease to amaze. Like our other regular hostess, aging ex-Playboy model Jenna McCartney, she’s far too hot to be a regular on a show like this ... But we’re not complaining.

“Hello, and welcome to ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’, with me, your host, Renae Russell ... This week I’ve travelled all the way up to Motherwell, in Scotland, to meet a young lady with a very naughty fantasy that we’ve never seen on our show before...”

We cut to inside the building and discover that it has one of those pretentious lobbies ... It’s doing its best to look like a sophisticated European headquarters, rather than a budget homebase. Over-compensating with moody lighting, polished concrete floors, and a show-off terrarium ... We get an unsubtle close-up of the tank where we can see two large snakes sliding over each other – no prizes for guessing this week’s guest’s fantasy...

Then we see our guest ... Top heavy, but slimmish – an Asian women with long wavy black hair tied back in a loose pony-tail. She has a round face and a loose mouth, and right now, rather than cleaning she’s standing infront of the snakes, her face inches from the glass, chewing on her bottom lip as she thinks about playing with those snakes.

We hear her in voice-over, struggling to introduce herself in English, her accent barely penetrable ... We considered subtitles, but then decided our audience was bright enough to understand her as she says...

“Hilo ... I em Eva Ahn ... I em 33 year old. I born Vietnam, now leev Scotalan ... I wan snayyyk for sex.” She lets out a little laugh.

We cut to a high angle shot of her using a floor-buffing machine, she seems very comfortable and confident with it, sweeping it from left-to-right, then back, shining up the concrete floor.

Then see Renae entering, walking across the large room, approaching Eva – who sees her coming and turns off the machine in time for us to hear the last few clicks of our host’s heels on the concrete.

Cut to a two shot of the ladies as they come face-to-face. The sexy-as-hell former pornstar, and the round-faced, large chested cleaning lady.

Renae gives her guest a big welcoming smile. “Hello there Eva...” – and gets the biggest, brightest smile in return. A genuinely happy welcome. Then continues, over pronouncing her words to make sure the Asian woman understands. “How long has it been your fantasy to ‘play’ with snakes?”

Eva nods, then pauses – waiting just long enough for us to think she’s not going to answer, then letting us know that, “I thing of this is for two year. Two year now.” She holds up two fingers.

“I see lady on tv with dog. I see with pig. I see with horse. Even with the bug and the fish ... Then I see with long fish, and I think snayyk ... And I think you can give me snayyk to sex on.”

Renae nods throughout her (short) answers, offering her encouragement as she struggles to make the words clear – then, when she finishes, asks, “Where did your fantasy come from? What made you think of having sex with snakes?”

Eva indicates the large snake display... “I begin work here two years. I look at snayyk evvy nihh ... Look them slippy on glass, slippy on other snayyk ... I thing bout them on me – on me body, on me leg, on me...” She touches her crotch as if she either doesn’t know the word, or is ashamed to say it ... Then continues, “I wan feel snayyyk on me now or I can’t wait.”

Not much that the Vietnamese woman says is clear, but we know what she wants, and being the United Kingdom of Zoo, you can be damned sure we’re going to make it happen!

Renae talks to Eva, but half talks to the camera, filling in the details for the viewers at home – who really don’t need the help ... We know what this Asian whore wants...

“For Eva ... The language barrier, cultural difficulties, and worries about her job, and her immigration status, have stopped her from chasing her dreams ... She thinks that if she’s caught she could get in a lot of trouble ... But on a show like ours – if a girl wants to have live snakes slithering all over her naked body, even inside her naked body ... Well ... All she has to do is ask!!”

She looks at Eva and smiles, and Eva smiles and nods ... And we cut to:

A large white tiled room. We’ve relocated to the executive bathroom in one of the company offices. It’s a good-sized room with several toilet stalls, a urinal, and most importantly for us, enough room for our guest to lay down and have some fun on the floor...

Right now she’s standing in the middle of the room, looking nervous but wearing a wide smile as she unbuttons the front of her blue blouse, gradually revealing deep cleavage behind a white bra. Once the blouse is off she takes a step to the side and hangs it carefully over the door of one of the toilet stalls. She steps back to the middle of the room, then reaches up to flip off the shoulder straps of her bra, pulling the whole thing down, away from her big boobs, around her middle. The boobs hang down and spread wider across her chest, large brown nipples pointing away at 5 and 7 o’clock angles. They’re not perfect, but you’d love to fondle them – as would our host by the sound of things...

She fills in the silence with a little squeaky-voiced commentary, “That’s a lovely, and completely natural pair of titties there ... If I had a pair like that I could have saved myself five thousand pounds!!”

As we focus on those lovely tits, she spins the bra around her middle and unhooks the fastener, then steps to the side again and hangs the bra on the handle of the stall door.

She turns to face us again, wearing an expression that suggests she doesn’t really get what Renae is saying about her boobs as she moves her hands to the button and zip on the front of her trousers. Unfastening the front, then peeling it open and wriggling them down over her narrow hips, and thin thighs, revealing the briefest pair of white panties – then lifting one foot and pulling it out, and repeating with the other foot. The trousers go the same way as the blouse and the bra, placed over the toilet stall door ... She holds onto the door with one hand and uses the other to slip the panties down, off her non-behind, and off. Bunching them up and pushing them into a pocket on the trousers. Even as she strips, she keeps things tidy – she’s well trained!

When she turns back to face us, she is stark naked. Her pussy is a surprisingly hairy bush – a very natural look. Black, thick and curly.

We hear Renae’s squeaky voice indicating that we’re about to begin, “Okay then ... Let’s get you started...” – and then see her reaching into the shot, a three-foot-long snake suspended over and between her hands...

As she raises the snake up toward our guest, the Asian slut looks as happy as any guest we’ve had on the show ... She leans forward, bending slightly to allow Renae to drape the reptile carefully over her head and around her neck, arranging it so that the long tail hang down between those big tits...

As the snake gets used to its new location, it tests out where it is by curling its tail backwards, accidentally wrapping it under one of those tits, slipping into the under-boob, snug to her flesh.

Eva reacts with that huge, genuine smile of wonder and joy ... Her mouth opening as she gasps a little at the sensation of the snake’s tail under her tit, the rest of the long beast moving around the back of her neck ... Slipping and rippling over her dark skin...

She giggles, “Sexy...” – but we’re not sure if this is her telling us what we’re seeing, or how she’s feeling...

We cut to a shot of her sitting back on the white floor ... Resting on her elbows ... The snake now resting on her chest, folded back against himself on top of those big tits ... His head raised, tongue flicking out ... Eva settling down onto her back, her skin against the cold floor, running her fingers over his body, one hand near his head – gently pushing his ‘neck’ to steer him away from her face. She’s writhing slightly against the tiles, obviously extremely turned on by having the snake against her flesh...

We can’t help wondering how many people have used this bathroom – how many more will do it over the next few weeks, unaware that a filthy slut was naked, playing with a snake, right here on the floor...

In this shot we can also see our host standing to the side, a second (darker) snake across her shoulders and around the back of her neck, his head moving down toward that tight valley of fake cleavage – we’d like to see him pushing in there, but Renae is wise to his move and brings up a hand to steer him away. She never stops watching Eva as she handles the snake, clearly very comfortable with the long reptiles...

We cut back to a close up of just our Vietnamese cleaning lady ... Laid back on the floor, with her feet now raised up onto the seat on either side of her hips, her thighs spread, her pussy exposed ... The lighter snake is curled over on her belly, moving around, his head/neck pinched gently between the Asian’s fingers. Renae is reaching in to lower the middle of the darker snake onto Eva’s large chest, positioning him between her big tits, so that it looks like the biggest tit-fuck ever as he slides up between them toward her neck, and begins to slip his head into the darkness between her neck and her long black hair, the thickest part of his body still between her tits.

“OOoooohhh...” Gasps our host, “That’s sooooo sexy...”

Our guest has got her head tipped forward, looking down over her body, admiring the snakes – an expression of mild fear coupled with excitement, flickering to an amazed smile every few seconds as the snake moves over her body and around behind her neck.

Meanwhile, ‘downstairs’, she’s spreading her thighs wider, reaching down with one hand to slip a couple of fingers into her pussy and open the slot up ... Showing off the glistening pink insides ... Bringing her other hand, with the snake’s head, down to the opening ... Letting his tongue, forked-tongue, flick out to sample her scent ... Trying to position him so that the tongue will flick over her clit ... Letting out a little giggle at the first moment of contact – not indicating any pleasure, just amusement that she’s been licked by a snake.

Eva looks up at our host and asks, “I push it in?” in broken English, “All in?”

Renae confirms, “Just give him a start, then let him go where he’s comfortable ... If he’s happy he’ll push in and ‘explore’ – ha ha ha...” She loves it!

The big chested cleaner reaches down, moving the snake’s head, twisting him around gently so he is facing her pussy, then carefully, playfully, pushes him forward ... His pointed head slipping between her pussy lips ... She opens them wider with the fingers of her other hand, and then slowly lets go of the snake’s head ... The look on her face is a combination of excitement of what’s to come, and fear that it might not happen ... Looking down at the snake between her thighs, then up at her host...

And then the snake decides to explore ... Moving in that strange way snakes do – slow and smooth ... Into her hole ... His head slowly disappearing from view – with our guest leaning back, arching her back, pushing those big tits forward, eyes rolling back ... Sighing “Ooooaaahhhhhh!” ever so quietly...

It’s like an endless, slow, single inward stroke of the biggest cock in the world ... Inch after inch disappearing into her flesh ... A little bit, then a pause, then a bit more ... Each movement making Eva gasp a little, arching her back or throwing her head back again ... Ten inches, a foot, eighteen inches – and the snake is half gone inside her...

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We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a perverted version of Supergirl ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea level over the Severn Estuary, between Wales (with a cartoonish huge flag waving on the coast, and the south-west coast of England, with...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e10 Alison Latham

Series 5, Episode 10: Alison Latham (47) – Wolverhampton We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then our very cartoonish, top heavy and slutty caricature of Charley appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” Then she waves for us to follow her, turns and skydives toward the country below at...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e7 Effat Hassan 41

Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e3 Rebecca

“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e7 Asha

Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess12e07 Cora Toney 25 from Newcastle

We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e5 Andrea

Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e18 Sylvia Distin 55 from Chelmsford

We’re cruising along a wide and quiet suburban street. Green lawns stretch back from the pavement to the nice semi-detached homes. There’s a slim woman walking a large dog along the side of the road, and we pan around to look at her as we pass – it’s no-one we know, but we kind of wish we did! Then we’re looking forward again – seeing an intersection infront of us ... Then pulling up, looking out of the side window right at a single story, flat-roofed building. A sign outside reads,...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e8 Patricia

Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e13 AnneMarie Silverwood

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e6 Maria

Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e6 Simone Butt 27 pig lover

Series 8, Episode 6: Simone Butt (27), from Bristol We open with an establishing shot of an impressive, modern brick and glass façade of a six-story office block on a busy street. Very clean, under a clear blue sky. We can see a figure approaching along the pavement, a slim lady with blonde hair. She’s wearing ripped blue jeans and a tight t-shirt, and her nice round boobs bounce on every step. It’s our Polish princess, Petra – and this week there’s no sign of her lovely Labrador. She...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e10 Imogen

Series 4, Episode 10: IMOGEN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Then we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town - windy, cold and rainy,...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e15 Donna Ferry 51

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – dropping all the way down to the North Sea, just off the coast ... Reaching sea level in a few seconds. From here we race toward the coast, between two piers, under a couple of bridges, and up a wide and winding river ... Under an old steel bridge, over a new concrete bridge, then deep inland ... At speed ......

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e8 Rosie

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home... Now we’re at a railway station, a big, clean and vibrant space. A sign on the wall reads ‘BIRMINGHAM NEW STREET’. It’s a large modern space, with...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e9 Shelly

Series 4, Episode 9: SHELLEY We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures... Now we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town. Out of season and on a windy, cold and rainy day, the place is virtually...

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